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Water is the essence of wetness | /r/Greentext


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Anon has eye strain | /r/Greentext

>21 years old >starting to slowly lose my eye vision because i keep sitting in a dark room for almost 3 years now with the only source of light being my monitor this f------ sucks 3h (7/6 6:47) ·64459586 1 Reply >>64459554 (OP) What? You know that's a myth right? You don't lose your vision from being in the dark. 3h (7/6 6:51) · 64459612 1 Reply >>64459586 If the only light source is a computer, it's bad Too much contrast between the computer and surrounding area forces your eye to constantly adjust to the level of light in the room as your eye shifts from the computer screen to the dark room.
>21 years old >starting to slowly lose my eye vision because i keep sitting in a dark room for almost 3 years now with the only source of light being my monitor this f------ sucks 3h (7/6 6:47) ·64459586 1 Reply >>64459554 (OP) What? You know that's a myth right? You don't lose your vision from being in the dark. 3h (7/6 6:51) · 64459612 1 Reply >>64459586 If the only light source is a computer, it's bad Too much contrast between the computer and surrounding area forces your eye to constantly adjust to the level of light in the room as your eye shifts from the computer screen to the dark room.

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Everything in its right place | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)07:52:14 No.858479442 *autistic screeching* ITT we post the highest levels of autism ever seen on 4chan. Bonus points for personal experience or a full blown thread. I'll start: >be me, 15 at the time 36 KB JPG >find a s----ton of baseball cards in my attic from varying years >take them to my room, and sit on the floor >no carpet in the basement, only a cold stone floor >organize all 12,396 of them in alphabetical order by last name of the player featured on the card, and if there were duplicates, in order from earliest to latest edition. >doesn't seem right >decide to reorder all of them in order from earliest year cards to latest, then by the companies that produced the cards, then by alphabetical order >still doesn't seem right >go by height of players from shortest to tallest >nope.avi >6 hours wasted, then figure out a perfect order >by serial number of the cards themselves >PERFECTION
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)07:52:14 No.858479442 *autistic screeching* ITT we post the highest levels of autism ever seen on 4chan. Bonus points for personal experience or a full blown thread. I'll start: >be me, 15 at the time 36 KB JPG >find a s----ton of baseball cards in my attic from varying years >take them to my room, and sit on the floor >no carpet in the basement, only a cold stone floor >organize all 12,396 of them in alphabetical order by last name of the player featured on the card, and if there were duplicates, in order from earliest to latest edition. >doesn't seem right >decide to reorder all of them in order from earliest year cards to latest, then by the companies that produced the cards, then by alphabetical order >still doesn't seem right >go by height of players from shortest to tallest >nope.avi >6 hours wasted, then figure out a perfect order >by serial number of the cards themselves >PERFECTION

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Anon developed a new fetish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)15:40:29 No.64462622 >hiking with friends >tomboy friend asks me to tag along with her while friends chill at bonfire >she proceeds to pull down her shorts and starts pissing while maintaining conversation with me 114 KB PNG
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)15:40:29 No.64462622 >hiking with friends >tomboy friend asks me to tag along with her while friends chill at bonfire >she proceeds to pull down her shorts and starts pissing while maintaining conversation with me 114 KB PNG

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Anon goes to a hockey game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)07:15:29 No.858472207 I got cancelled IRL >be 37 year old loser no job no life rot in moms house >hate the n---- >saw local fb page for a youth hockey team >there is one n----- on the team and these are I think 15 year olds 68 KB JPG >go to hockey game and start walking around the outside of the rink yelling "die n-----" "f--- you n-----" etc >get caught and kicked out >literally one person knew me there and outted me >can't sleep was threatened and followed home by a couple f----- hockey dads >stuck inside again I thought it would be the start of me getting out of the house and starting to live a little >f--- woke culture 6 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)07:15:29 No.858472207 I got cancelled IRL >be 37 year old loser no job no life rot in moms house >hate the n---- >saw local fb page for a youth hockey team >there is one n----- on the team and these are I think 15 year olds 68 KB JPG >go to hockey game and start walking around the outside of the rink yelling "die n-----" "f--- you n-----" etc >get caught and kicked out >literally one person knew me there and outted me >can't sleep was threatened and followed home by a couple f----- hockey dads >stuck inside again I thought it would be the start of me getting out of the house and starting to live a little >f--- woke culture 6 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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anon lives in the best country | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/04/21(Sun)21:48:57 No.858354928 >be me, american >taking night classes at the local high school so i can get a phd and earn $15 an hour >school shooter enters classroom the third time this week 59 KB JPG >shoots me, i go unconscious >wake up in hospital, apparently my thirteen inches of chest fat stopped the bullet from hitting my heart >sell house, car and dog to pay hospital debt >finish treatment after a week >get shot by cop and die
: Anonymous 07/04/21(Sun)21:48:57 No.858354928 >be me, american >taking night classes at the local high school so i can get a phd and earn $15 an hour >school shooter enters classroom the third time this week 59 KB JPG >shoots me, i go unconscious >wake up in hospital, apparently my thirteen inches of chest fat stopped the bullet from hitting my heart >sell house, car and dog to pay hospital debt >finish treatment after a week >get shot by cop and die

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Anon is feeling trolley | /r/Greentext

>Wake up feeling trolley >Go on Twitter >Be extremely homophobic >All the Emilys ACAB BLM (she/her) immediately start to attack me 43 KB JPG >They call me a p------------ >l call them anti-semetic nazi scums for not respecting one of my religious beliefs >Go on a rant about how my religious views aren't respected my the them western imperialistic fascists >Finish by saying someday Allah will show them his light >Watch their little brains blue screen Seethe F------
>Wake up feeling trolley >Go on Twitter >Be extremely homophobic >All the Emilys ACAB BLM (she/her) immediately start to attack me 43 KB JPG >They call me a p------------ >l call them anti-semetic nazi scums for not respecting one of my religious beliefs >Go on a rant about how my religious views aren't respected my the them western imperialistic fascists >Finish by saying someday Allah will show them his light >Watch their little brains blue screen Seethe F------

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Anon doesn't need a tent | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)02:00:16 No.2128676 >>2122263 # >be me >go camping with friends >"Anon, where is your tent and sleeping bag?" >pull out carton of cigarettes, gallon of tang, extra large bottle of cheap vodka >"Here's my plan, use supplies to get someone drunk enough to let me sleep with them." >get to camp site >bunch of hippies partying nearby >go hang out with them >Oh s---, they don't have any smokes, good thing I have a carton of Marlboro reds >Oh s---, they haven't had a ghetto ass screwdriver, good thing I have enough to share >party into the night >hook up with some cracked out, hippie chick with 2 different colored eyes >"Achievement: Lose my VCard" - obtained >sleep in their van >rejoin my group next day >"W-- Anon?" >"S--- worked out last night." II Not sure how the f--- I made it out of my later teen years >>2132419 # >>2132551 # >>2133410 # >>2153692 #
Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)02:00:16 No.2128676 >>2122263 # >be me >go camping with friends >"Anon, where is your tent and sleeping bag?" >pull out carton of cigarettes, gallon of tang, extra large bottle of cheap vodka >"Here's my plan, use supplies to get someone drunk enough to let me sleep with them." >get to camp site >bunch of hippies partying nearby >go hang out with them >Oh s---, they don't have any smokes, good thing I have a carton of Marlboro reds >Oh s---, they haven't had a ghetto ass screwdriver, good thing I have enough to share >party into the night >hook up with some cracked out, hippie chick with 2 different colored eyes >"Achievement: Lose my VCard" - obtained >sleep in their van >rejoin my group next day >"W-- Anon?" >"S--- worked out last night." II Not sure how the f--- I made it out of my later teen years >>2132419 # >>2132551 # >>2133410 # >>2153692 #

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Anon writes a song | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 20:06:57 No.63219574 hi my name is Alvin I am 11 years old I really like among us and memes and I have seen a lot of funny 4chan stories on reddit. I wrote this song about Among us for you guys I hope it's funny and please share other cool stuff with me thanks 17 KB JPG > oh yea when the imposster is sussy >I do your mom in the p---- > sussy sussy sussy > your fat moms p---- > if you are sus > you ride the short bus
: Anonymous 20:06:57 No.63219574 hi my name is Alvin I am 11 years old I really like among us and memes and I have seen a lot of funny 4chan stories on reddit. I wrote this song about Among us for you guys I hope it's funny and please share other cool stuff with me thanks 17 KB JPG > oh yea when the imposster is sussy >I do your mom in the p---- > sussy sussy sussy > your fat moms p---- > if you are sus > you ride the short bus

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Anon gets hired | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/03/20(Mon)01:52:34 No.137379681 >You must be anon right? 25 unemployed, no drivers license, no university degree and no signs of a girlfriend in the registry. >Welcome aboard. 54 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/03/20(Mon)01:52:34 No.137379681 >You must be anon right? 25 unemployed, no drivers license, no university degree and no signs of a girlfriend in the registry. >Welcome aboard. 54 KB JPG

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Anon points out a useful skill to have | /r/Greentext

SOCIAL O Anonymous 07/02/21(Fri)19:30:47 No.858197549 tiy dyeoeits at nata >best cheat code for life: be sociable >that's literally it, just have social skills and you're set for life >life is kind to rich and attractive people, but even kinder to socially competent people witid gang dmiti wng o If you look closely, you'll notice that people with the best jobs aren't necessarily the ones with the best curriculum or gpa or whatever but rather the ones who networked the best. Same for school, the class representative or leader of the school's union wasn't the one with the best grades but rather the one who knew how to handle most social situations to lift themselves in the social hierarchy. And the healthiest people are the ones with a good social circle - socializing is important for our mental health as well.
SOCIAL O Anonymous 07/02/21(Fri)19:30:47 No.858197549 tiy dyeoeits at nata >best cheat code for life: be sociable >that's literally it, just have social skills and you're set for life >life is kind to rich and attractive people, but even kinder to socially competent people witid gang dmiti wng o If you look closely, you'll notice that people with the best jobs aren't necessarily the ones with the best curriculum or gpa or whatever but rather the ones who networked the best. Same for school, the class representative or leader of the school's union wasn't the one with the best grades but rather the one who knew how to handle most social situations to lift themselves in the social hierarchy. And the healthiest people are the ones with a good social circle - socializing is important for our mental health as well.

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Anon hates life | /r/Greentext

File: 8184EA66-E997-4420-897F-1(..).jpg (23 KB, 474x266) Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)00:51:01 No.858457164 >tfw I'm alive for a time where people trust blatant misinformation >tfw I'm alive for a time where American politics are a joke and both sides are full of old men >tfw I'm alive for a time where people will be cancelled for a single statement from decades ago >tfw I'm alive for a time when the left calls you a bigot for not accepting p--------- as a sexuality >tfw I'm alive for a time when it's considered "fat shaming" to tell someone who's morbidly obese to get in shape >tfw I live in a time where my country is encouraged to be hated on by sjw's on Twitter >tfw billionaires control most of the world and its economy >ffw I'm alive in a time when the main entity that controls the earth is a corrupt megacorporation >tfw I'm alive in a time where most children are raised by screens and not by their parents >tfw I'm not alive to fight for my country over anything that matters >tfw my life lacks any meaning now that humanity is so overpopulated >tfw people are so afraid of death that they'd rather overpopulate the planet and live in their own filth and disease than lose a couple of people "But life isn't that bad anon" [Return] [Catalog] [Top]
File: 8184EA66-E997-4420-897F-1(..).jpg (23 KB, 474x266) Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)00:51:01 No.858457164 >tfw I'm alive for a time where people trust blatant misinformation >tfw I'm alive for a time where American politics are a joke and both sides are full of old men >tfw I'm alive for a time where people will be cancelled for a single statement from decades ago >tfw I'm alive for a time when the left calls you a bigot for not accepting p--------- as a sexuality >tfw I'm alive for a time when it's considered "fat shaming" to tell someone who's morbidly obese to get in shape >tfw I live in a time where my country is encouraged to be hated on by sjw's on Twitter >tfw billionaires control most of the world and its economy >ffw I'm alive in a time when the main entity that controls the earth is a corrupt megacorporation >tfw I'm alive in a time where most children are raised by screens and not by their parents >tfw I'm not alive to fight for my country over anything that matters >tfw my life lacks any meaning now that humanity is so overpopulated >tfw people are so afraid of death that they'd rather overpopulate the planet and live in their own filth and disease than lose a couple of people "But life isn't that bad anon" [Return] [Catalog] [Top]

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Pain, suffering, agony even | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)12:36:19 No.64461890 True story thread? >be me, lonely virgin >never held hands with a girl >finally meet someone that likes me >she comes over to my house, we start talking 141 KB JPG >find out we have a lot of the same interests >have sex later, never been happier in my entire life Few days later >we order pizza but it never arrives >decide f--- it, lets eat at a restaurant >end up on the beach >sunset >we kiss >feels like everything is perfect in this moment >wake up >mfw it was all a dream >cry for hours The dream litteraly felt like it lasted for days. Why does this s--- happen to me?
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)12:36:19 No.64461890 True story thread? >be me, lonely virgin >never held hands with a girl >finally meet someone that likes me >she comes over to my house, we start talking 141 KB JPG >find out we have a lot of the same interests >have sex later, never been happier in my entire life Few days later >we order pizza but it never arrives >decide f--- it, lets eat at a restaurant >end up on the beach >sunset >we kiss >feels like everything is perfect in this moment >wake up >mfw it was all a dream >cry for hours The dream litteraly felt like it lasted for days. Why does this s--- happen to me?

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Anons have smooth brain moments | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)08:30:00 No.64461133 >go pee >take underwear all the way off for some reason >throw underwear in toilet >wet plap of it hitting the water >watch it sink into the bowl a little 8 KB JPG >start peeing before I realize what I just did >mfw 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)08:33:50 No.64461154 >>64461133 (OP) # >go to change the toilet paper >get a fresh roll out >throw it right into the toilet Based OP making me not feel as bad
: Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)08:30:00 No.64461133 >go pee >take underwear all the way off for some reason >throw underwear in toilet >wet plap of it hitting the water >watch it sink into the bowl a little 8 KB JPG >start peeing before I realize what I just did >mfw 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 07/06/21(Tue)08:33:50 No.64461154 >>64461133 (OP) # >go to change the toilet paper >get a fresh roll out >throw it right into the toilet Based OP making me not feel as bad

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Anon runs a resturant. | /r/Greentext


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Anon meets a British person | /r/Greentext


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I'll be your mirror | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Istalk/ but not actual stalkin(...) 07/05/21(Mon)06:30:29 No.64450356 Anyone else have individuals they are obsessed with and they follow STALKER obsessively on social media? >crush has TikTok >Made an account, follow her and she accepted (kinda stupid of her but I aint gonna complain) 52 KB JPG >Pretend to be LGBT even though I hate LGBT (except her. she is LGBT so I gotta pretend) >Make stupid dumb f------ tik tok videos >Do this all just so I can follow her private account without her getting suspicious Anyone in a similar boat?
: Anonymous Istalk/ but not actual stalkin(...) 07/05/21(Mon)06:30:29 No.64450356 Anyone else have individuals they are obsessed with and they follow STALKER obsessively on social media? >crush has TikTok >Made an account, follow her and she accepted (kinda stupid of her but I aint gonna complain) 52 KB JPG >Pretend to be LGBT even though I hate LGBT (except her. she is LGBT so I gotta pretend) >Make stupid dumb f------ tik tok videos >Do this all just so I can follow her private account without her getting suspicious Anyone in a similar boat?

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Anon has made it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Inflection point: Should I bec(...) 07/05/21 (Mon)22:05:02 No.64455881 >27 yo >khvirgin >Meet a cute 31 year old single mom >She has a 7 year old boy >Starts showing interest in me >Thinks I'm cool, flirts, eventually asks 183 KB JPG me out. >The date was awesome, I was nervous and she thought it was cute. >Drops her at her place, the nanny is just leaving >"Hey anon, my kid is already sleeping, don't you want to come in?" >holyshititshappening.jpg >Small talk on the couch, she jumps on top of me and starts making out with me. >Sex.jpg >l never felt so happy in my life >Been together for two months >Her kid is a cool guy, loves dinosaurs >We go to the museum, see some fossils I buy him ice cream and a toy triceratops. >"uncle anon, this is the best day ever" For the first time in my life, I feel a fraction of what a being a father is like. I feel purpose and drive, my job doesn't seem pointless anymore. I look forward to meeting them and doing family stuff together. Am I making a huge mistake? I think I'm gonna marry this woman and adopt the little guy.
: Anonymous Inflection point: Should I bec(...) 07/05/21 (Mon)22:05:02 No.64455881 >27 yo >khvirgin >Meet a cute 31 year old single mom >She has a 7 year old boy >Starts showing interest in me >Thinks I'm cool, flirts, eventually asks 183 KB JPG me out. >The date was awesome, I was nervous and she thought it was cute. >Drops her at her place, the nanny is just leaving >"Hey anon, my kid is already sleeping, don't you want to come in?" >holyshititshappening.jpg >Small talk on the couch, she jumps on top of me and starts making out with me. >Sex.jpg >l never felt so happy in my life >Been together for two months >Her kid is a cool guy, loves dinosaurs >We go to the museum, see some fossils I buy him ice cream and a toy triceratops. >"uncle anon, this is the best day ever" For the first time in my life, I feel a fraction of what a being a father is like. I feel purpose and drive, my job doesn't seem pointless anymore. I look forward to meeting them and doing family stuff together. Am I making a huge mistake? I think I'm gonna marry this woman and adopt the little guy.

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Anon does a little trolling | /r/Greentext

No.858448729 07/05/21(Mon)20:53:49 2FF96163-8F5C-4F2A-BBB1-316F07C56ADF.png PNG 550.9 Kiв 619х562 >be me >friends share p--- all the time in group chat >decide to do a little trolling >save an entire folder of traps that pass as female if you don't know better >every time they send sauce, I send a trap >they always respond with reaction images and gifs about how hot the pics are >l do this for a year >finally tell them they were all dudes >some are p-----, one actually came out as gay in the midst of all the chaos >group chat is still blowing up >eating tendies and laughing my ass off
No.858448729 07/05/21(Mon)20:53:49 2FF96163-8F5C-4F2A-BBB1-316F07C56ADF.png PNG 550.9 Kiв 619х562 >be me >friends share p--- all the time in group chat >decide to do a little trolling >save an entire folder of traps that pass as female if you don't know better >every time they send sauce, I send a trap >they always respond with reaction images and gifs about how hot the pics are >l do this for a year >finally tell them they were all dudes >some are p-----, one actually came out as gay in the midst of all the chaos >group chat is still blowing up >eating tendies and laughing my ass off

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Anon bout to drop his spaghetti | /r/Greentext

NHH Norges Handelshayskole Am ae O Anonymous (ID: 2otgtgwJ)E 07/05/21 (Mon)20:17:19 No.328877168 >>328878497 >>328878922 >>328879170 >>328879729 >>328879803 >>328879914 >>328 >>328883515 >>328883596 >>328884325 >>328885545 >>328885606 >have lecture >walk in room >see pic related >faint artificial strawberry scent in the air >hot summer day >24 degrees in the room >walk up to front of the class >knees are weak, legs can hardly carry you >turn around to face the class >100 fertile, breeding age nord female faces >sweat leaking out of every part of your body >r----------- coming on >aint nothing stopping this bad boy What do?
NHH Norges Handelshayskole Am ae O Anonymous (ID: 2otgtgwJ)E 07/05/21 (Mon)20:17:19 No.328877168 >>328878497 >>328878922 >>328879170 >>328879729 >>328879803 >>328879914 >>328 >>328883515 >>328883596 >>328884325 >>328885545 >>328885606 >have lecture >walk in room >see pic related >faint artificial strawberry scent in the air >hot summer day >24 degrees in the room >walk up to front of the class >knees are weak, legs can hardly carry you >turn around to face the class >100 fertile, breeding age nord female faces >sweat leaking out of every part of your body >r----------- coming on >aint nothing stopping this bad boy What do?

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