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Anon worries about his first kiss while literally getting raped | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)08:34:59 No.64048147 >be me, 18yo kissless virgin >go out for a night with the boys >get s-------- drunk and end up passing out on the street >wake up to some disgusting man making out with my half passed out self 3 KB JPG >mfw my first kiss was with a man what should I do from here? should I just kms? : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)09:28:09 No.64048651 >>64048147 (OP) # You should get the f--- off this board before you start downloading Grinder and get TOPPED by a Dilf you f-----
: Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)08:34:59 No.64048147 >be me, 18yo kissless virgin >go out for a night with the boys >get s-------- drunk and end up passing out on the street >wake up to some disgusting man making out with my half passed out self 3 KB JPG >mfw my first kiss was with a man what should I do from here? should I just kms? : Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)09:28:09 No.64048651 >>64048147 (OP) # You should get the f--- off this board before you start downloading Grinder and get TOPPED by a Dilf you f-----

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Anon finds happiness | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/25/21(Fri)00:28:21 No.857586033 >be me >twitch grind >Town of Salem gaming >have really good stream >4 new followers, 8 max viewers >fun stream, new frens 8 KB PNG Am happy 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/25/21(Fri)00:44:15 No.857587154 >>857586033 (OP)_# n-----
: Anonymous 06/25/21(Fri)00:28:21 No.857586033 >be me >twitch grind >Town of Salem gaming >have really good stream >4 new followers, 8 max viewers >fun stream, new frens 8 KB PNG Am happy 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/25/21(Fri)00:44:15 No.857587154 >>857586033 (OP)_# n-----

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Anon got protection | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)21:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high-crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent some time 1.19 MB JPG in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice >leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing
: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)21:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high-crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent some time 1.19 MB JPG in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice >leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing

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Hunter eyes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:13:07 No.64279825 I wanna go kayaking with a cute boy in a frilly dress! 99 KB PNG 7 Replies / 5 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:38:00 No.64280114 >>64280229 # : Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:46:54 No.64280229 >>64280114 # >go kayaking with dad >he gets upset with me for rowing too hard and getting ahead of everyone, as if it's not a 1.29 MB PNG competition, ha ha just enjoy yourself, enjoy the nature, bro We can go, but only if you bring the will to win with you.
: Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:13:07 No.64279825 I wanna go kayaking with a cute boy in a frilly dress! 99 KB PNG 7 Replies / 5 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:38:00 No.64280114 >>64280229 # : Anonymous 06/23/21(Wed)16:46:54 No.64280229 >>64280114 # >go kayaking with dad >he gets upset with me for rowing too hard and getting ahead of everyone, as if it's not a 1.29 MB PNG competition, ha ha just enjoy yourself, enjoy the nature, bro We can go, but only if you bring the will to win with you.

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I Should Be Doing Something. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/31/21(Wed)17:56:24 No.63001106 >Feel like I should be doing something >Don't know what >Vague sense of uneasiness that I'm not doing it 59 KB JPG View Thread
: Anonymous 03/31/21(Wed)17:56:24 No.63001106 >Feel like I should be doing something >Don't know what >Vague sense of uneasiness that I'm not doing it 59 KB JPG View Thread

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Anon dreams. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/07/19(Sun)07:06:08 No.53261066 >be me >college student >decent guitarist >decent bandmate >actually pretty popular too >bigmanoncampus.mp4 >walking through hallway 54 KB JPG >run into goth qt 22/7 simplified >asks if we're still on for later >hellyeahweare.png >get this warm feeling of belonging >feels like a warm embrace in my soul >wake up >fell asleep watching tv >time to go to work Gets me every time, robots.
: Anonymous 07/07/19(Sun)07:06:08 No.53261066 >be me >college student >decent guitarist >decent bandmate >actually pretty popular too >bigmanoncampus.mp4 >walking through hallway 54 KB JPG >run into goth qt 22/7 simplified >asks if we're still on for later >hellyeahweare.png >get this warm feeling of belonging >feels like a warm embrace in my soul >wake up >fell asleep watching tv >time to go to work Gets me every time, robots.

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Anon has flashback | /r/Greentext

No.4576021 4 hours ago broccoli 05.jpg JPG 35.6 KiB 460x460 >>at the grocery store with mom >>getting vegetables >>she tells me to get a cucumber and bag it >>touching it makes me think about all the p--- I've seen where cucumbers are being used as dildos >>l imagine it as being a beautifully thick c--- >>get a boner No.4576036 4 hours ago kek ! ...
No.4576021 4 hours ago broccoli 05.jpg JPG 35.6 KiB 460x460 >>at the grocery store with mom >>getting vegetables >>she tells me to get a cucumber and bag it >>touching it makes me think about all the p--- I've seen where cucumbers are being used as dildos >>l imagine it as being a beautifully thick c--- >>get a boner No.4576036 4 hours ago kek ! ...

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Anon solves his porn addiction | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous = 06/23/21(Wed)22:46:08 No.64284722 >be me >decide to abstain from masturbating for 1 week so l'm pent up when I do it and it feels better >1 week goes by >"I'm already here, why not take it further and get the ultimate coom 84 KB JPG after 1 month" >1 month goes by >don't feel the need to masturbate anymore >l can easily ignore p--- now whitout needing to bust a nut >mfw I accidentally solved my p--- addiction
: Anonymous = 06/23/21(Wed)22:46:08 No.64284722 >be me >decide to abstain from masturbating for 1 week so l'm pent up when I do it and it feels better >1 week goes by >"I'm already here, why not take it further and get the ultimate coom 84 KB JPG after 1 month" >1 month goes by >don't feel the need to masturbate anymore >l can easily ignore p--- now whitout needing to bust a nut >mfw I accidentally solved my p--- addiction

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Anon is a professional retard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I HATE BEING A ROBOT 06/24/21(Thu)14:33:40 No.64289325 >Be at airport >Plane leaves in two hours >Decide to go the airport restaurant >Order some food >Kinda nervous about flying, only done it a few times before 8 KB JPG >Call parents to calm my nerves >Food arrives, get some water >Friends detect l'm nervous, try to cheer me up >Water arrives >Girl who gives me it is supermodel-tier 10/10 >Immediately lock up, total robot moment >Start shaking really bad when she puts the water down >Know that she knows >Feel like I'm going to be sick, s--- myself and c-- at the same time >She turns and leaves >Shaking so bad >My gf gives me a hug >l move to hug her back, accidentally knock over the water >Shitshitshitshitshit >Realise I'm going to have to ask the 10/10 for a tissue >Nope.jpg >Pay for the food whilst trying to ignore the giant puddle >Leave immediately, tell my friends I don't feel good >Spend next two hours playing candy crush >Still thinking about it a week later WHY AM I LIKE THIS???
: Anonymous I HATE BEING A ROBOT 06/24/21(Thu)14:33:40 No.64289325 >Be at airport >Plane leaves in two hours >Decide to go the airport restaurant >Order some food >Kinda nervous about flying, only done it a few times before 8 KB JPG >Call parents to calm my nerves >Food arrives, get some water >Friends detect l'm nervous, try to cheer me up >Water arrives >Girl who gives me it is supermodel-tier 10/10 >Immediately lock up, total robot moment >Start shaking really bad when she puts the water down >Know that she knows >Feel like I'm going to be sick, s--- myself and c-- at the same time >She turns and leaves >Shaking so bad >My gf gives me a hug >l move to hug her back, accidentally knock over the water >Shitshitshitshitshit >Realise I'm going to have to ask the 10/10 for a tissue >Nope.jpg >Pay for the food whilst trying to ignore the giant puddle >Leave immediately, tell my friends I don't feel good >Spend next two hours playing candy crush >Still thinking about it a week later WHY AM I LIKE THIS???

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Anon has weird tastes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/09/21(Tue)21:47:25 No.849212403 >Be me >Love picking scabs >Have picked scabs since a child >Covered in scars >Have several open scabs at all times 36 KB JPG >Try keep them open so they remain dry and not fleshy, so I can pick them off better >Aim to not make the scabs bleed as I pick them >Eat the scabs >Have one scab thats been open for almost 2 years >Love the scab >Have eaten from it almost every day Why do I do this?
: Anonymous 03/09/21(Tue)21:47:25 No.849212403 >Be me >Love picking scabs >Have picked scabs since a child >Covered in scars >Have several open scabs at all times 36 KB JPG >Try keep them open so they remain dry and not fleshy, so I can pick them off better >Aim to not make the scabs bleed as I pick them >Eat the scabs >Have one scab thats been open for almost 2 years >Love the scab >Have eaten from it almost every day Why do I do this?

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Anon DM’s a jojo reference | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:13:41 No.68628658 >Be me >DMing a party for Curse of Strahd, 5e >Giving very brief description of module, something about traveling across the lands to defeat an ultra-powerful vampire lord 100 KB JPG >See players all start to look at each other >One asks if all the players can have known each other before the game started >"Sure" >They tell me they'll make the party >l ask if they're sure they want to do this on their own, as I usually help them with character creation >They ensure me they've got it this time >Not even a day later on Discord >Realize all my players are weebs as they send me pic related and ask if it's okay if they play them for this campaign >Can't tell if they're serious >Haven't responded yet I can't tell if this will be the worst or best game I'm about to DM : Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:31:06 No.68628877 >>68628658_(OP) # Do it. You have to do it. Assume they're serious until proven otherwise. FIVE DIOS 63 KB PNG
: Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:13:41 No.68628658 >Be me >DMing a party for Curse of Strahd, 5e >Giving very brief description of module, something about traveling across the lands to defeat an ultra-powerful vampire lord 100 KB JPG >See players all start to look at each other >One asks if all the players can have known each other before the game started >"Sure" >They tell me they'll make the party >l ask if they're sure they want to do this on their own, as I usually help them with character creation >They ensure me they've got it this time >Not even a day later on Discord >Realize all my players are weebs as they send me pic related and ask if it's okay if they play them for this campaign >Can't tell if they're serious >Haven't responded yet I can't tell if this will be the worst or best game I'm about to DM : Anonymous 09/30/19(Mon)02:31:06 No.68628877 >>68628658_(OP) # Do it. You have to do it. Assume they're serious until proven otherwise. FIVE DIOS 63 KB PNG

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Anon's b-day | /r/Greentext

File: images.jpg (8 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:15:45 No.64286630 >be me >Today is my birthday >No friends or anyone to celebrate >Supposed to be sad because social stigma >Choose not to be and have a good night >Pic related And that's how you flip their normie script boys O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:17:42 No.64286645 File: mg7wjnt4wqr41.jpg (93 KB, 1125x1107) Happy birth date anniversary anon
File: images.jpg (8 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:15:45 No.64286630 >be me >Today is my birthday >No friends or anyone to celebrate >Supposed to be sad because social stigma >Choose not to be and have a good night >Pic related And that's how you flip their normie script boys O Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:17:42 No.64286645 File: mg7wjnt4wqr41.jpg (93 KB, 1125x1107) Happy birth date anniversary anon

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Anon doesn't like women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Do you think you will be MGTOW(...) 06/24/21(Thu)12:31:44 No.64287025 when you are older will you >see blackpills daily about the evils of women >last one was about a guy giving up his dream of being a doctor for his high school sweetheart to be a dad 413 KB JPG >has 3 kids and reach their 50s together >daughter does DNA test and turns out this guys wife had an 11 year affair with neighbor and none of the kids are his >kills himself I just cant even like females anymore besides sexually wanting to f--- them Im coming to the conclusion even when they want to settle because they are getting ugly and old that they wont be loyal at all so I will have to accept being alone vs being with those selfish things caring for one
: Anonymous Do you think you will be MGTOW(...) 06/24/21(Thu)12:31:44 No.64287025 when you are older will you >see blackpills daily about the evils of women >last one was about a guy giving up his dream of being a doctor for his high school sweetheart to be a dad 413 KB JPG >has 3 kids and reach their 50s together >daughter does DNA test and turns out this guys wife had an 11 year affair with neighbor and none of the kids are his >kills himself I just cant even like females anymore besides sexually wanting to f--- them Im coming to the conclusion even when they want to settle because they are getting ugly and old that they wont be loyal at all so I will have to accept being alone vs being with those selfish things caring for one

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Anon hustles | /r/Greentext

No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars
No.772995598 06/30/18(Sat)05:29:45 R14kkDj.jpg JPG 35.1 KiB 657x527 >be me >be in 5th grade >class is planning field trip, need money >everyone needs to bring 20 dollars >go home, ask mom for 30 dollars so I can have 10 dollars extra for myself >mom doesn't believe me, goes to friend's house who lives on the same street >ohshit.gif >comes back angry, saying I need to pay more attention in class meetings >tfw I found out my friend told his parents that he needed 50 dollars

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We all know anon is lying about having a gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:07:14 No.63077507 >used to have a hot ass gf >big ass DD t--- and skinny >they were perky and super nice >looked like tessa fowler or gianna michaels type s--- >miss them and still j------- to them 38 KB JPG >she has kids now and its been years and im pretty sure shes fat and destroyed >i lost a bunch of the pictures since then so ive just been jerking off to them same ones 10 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:36:12 No.63077832 >>63077507 (OP) # Well anon i come to r9k nowadays to laugh at people, so how or why did you lose her?
: Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:07:14 No.63077507 >used to have a hot ass gf >big ass DD t--- and skinny >they were perky and super nice >looked like tessa fowler or gianna michaels type s--- >miss them and still j------- to them 38 KB JPG >she has kids now and its been years and im pretty sure shes fat and destroyed >i lost a bunch of the pictures since then so ive just been jerking off to them same ones 10 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 04/06/21(Tue)10:36:12 No.63077832 >>63077507 (OP) # Well anon i come to r9k nowadays to laugh at people, so how or why did you lose her?

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anon finds a loli | /r/Greentext

>be me, work at pizza place >sometimes a little girl will come in and pick up a pizza by herself every week or so >female staff love her and know her by name >i always thought she lived across the street or something >today she came in soaked from head to toe >find out she lives a mile away >mfw this little loli walked a mile in the rain to pick up a pizza
>be me, work at pizza place >sometimes a little girl will come in and pick up a pizza by herself every week or so >female staff love her and know her by name >i always thought she lived across the street or something >today she came in soaked from head to toe >find out she lives a mile away >mfw this little loli walked a mile in the rain to pick up a pizza

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Anons tinder match hasn't done DMT | /r/Greentext

No.244428596 hours ago 1601829110194.jpg JPG 336.1 KIB 2000x1000 >match with girl >Get her number >Text >Asks me what type of podcasts I like >l tell her I listen to Joe rogan >She says "...seriously dude?" >Me: "hell yeah I love joe rogan!" >She gives me a peace sign emoji >"Unable to deliver message" 11 >Check tinder >She unmatched me Why does this s--- happen? 3 replies
No.244428596 hours ago 1601829110194.jpg JPG 336.1 KIB 2000x1000 >match with girl >Get her number >Text >Asks me what type of podcasts I like >l tell her I listen to Joe rogan >She says "...seriously dude?" >Me: "hell yeah I love joe rogan!" >She gives me a peace sign emoji >"Unable to deliver message" 11 >Check tinder >She unmatched me Why does this s--- happen? 3 replies

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Anon doesn’t like Steven Coward | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)04:36:49 No.857528642 >Loser who hangs around college campuses he is not enrolled at >Picks fights with retarded freshmen cause he thinks it makes him look good >Picks fight with some 80 KB JPG other retard online >Retard brings along a professional >NoShows because of professional >Cries online about how unfair the retard was to him Why is the right so full of cowards?
: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)04:36:49 No.857528642 >Loser who hangs around college campuses he is not enrolled at >Picks fights with retarded freshmen cause he thinks it makes him look good >Picks fight with some 80 KB JPG other retard online >Retard brings along a professional >NoShows because of professional >Cries online about how unfair the retard was to him Why is the right so full of cowards?

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Anon hates the therapy crisis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:27:17 No.857553114 >be me >depressed as f--- >contemplating suicide >try to see therapist >every single therapist in the entire state is taking no Mron nerged 102 KB JPG patients >go to gp >says the hospital has a therapist and refers her to me >have to wait three weeks to see her >have a somewhat awkward but good talk that lasts 50 minutes >my next session with her is in 2 months >f--- 2021 >f--- therapy crisis View Thread
: Anonymous 06/24/21(Thu)08:27:17 No.857553114 >be me >depressed as f--- >contemplating suicide >try to see therapist >every single therapist in the entire state is taking no Mron nerged 102 KB JPG patients >go to gp >says the hospital has a therapist and refers her to me >have to wait three weeks to see her >have a somewhat awkward but good talk that lasts 50 minutes >my next session with her is in 2 months >f--- 2021 >f--- therapy crisis View Thread

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Autismatic for the people | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/23/21 (Wed)15:37:22 No.64279436 >be me >kinda feminine so people automatically assume l'm gay >haven't had any emotional or physical connection to a person in a long time >really f------ shy 59 KB PNG >don't understand social queues >never been able to get a gf >meet this one girl >think she understands me >shes really f------ cool, helps me a lot with emotions n stuff >thought this girl was flirting with me >she was really f------ hot, had the same sense of humor as me >finally ask her out >goes on a massive tangent about how she has no attraction to me and doesn't want me to get the wrong idea >next day starts telling me about boys she likes >flash forward a few months to today, been diagnosed with autism >just want a hug I know this isn't exactly the place to ask for advice on this stuff, just kinda wanted to get it out of my system. what am I doing wrong?
: Anonymous 06/23/21 (Wed)15:37:22 No.64279436 >be me >kinda feminine so people automatically assume l'm gay >haven't had any emotional or physical connection to a person in a long time >really f------ shy 59 KB PNG >don't understand social queues >never been able to get a gf >meet this one girl >think she understands me >shes really f------ cool, helps me a lot with emotions n stuff >thought this girl was flirting with me >she was really f------ hot, had the same sense of humor as me >finally ask her out >goes on a massive tangent about how she has no attraction to me and doesn't want me to get the wrong idea >next day starts telling me about boys she likes >flash forward a few months to today, been diagnosed with autism >just want a hug I know this isn't exactly the place to ask for advice on this stuff, just kinda wanted to get it out of my system. what am I doing wrong?

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