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Anons gay brother wants to visit the world cup | /r/Greentext

Anonymous GIGA 1.68 MB GIF 10/27/22(Thu)11:48:17 No.124717100 >older brother is gay >very flamboyant >wears rainbow flags on all his clothes, floppy wristed, has a backpack which is printed so it looks like a naked man without arms or legs etc >insists on going to Qatar >says he will be himself, says I am hoomophobic for saying he is clearly gay >said "if the police bother me, I'll sprinkle them with GAY FAIRYTALE MAGIC" >my sister responded with "yassss" He's going to die isn't he? Suppose its my fault for letting him blow me when we were both in our early twenties >>124717113 # >>124717127 #
Anonymous GIGA 1.68 MB GIF 10/27/22(Thu)11:48:17 No.124717100 >older brother is gay >very flamboyant >wears rainbow flags on all his clothes, floppy wristed, has a backpack which is printed so it looks like a naked man without arms or legs etc >insists on going to Qatar >says he will be himself, says I am hoomophobic for saying he is clearly gay >said "if the police bother me, I'll sprinkle them with GAY FAIRYTALE MAGIC" >my sister responded with "yassss" He's going to die isn't he? Suppose its my fault for letting him blow me when we were both in our early twenties >>124717113 # >>124717127 #

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anon likes brochures | /r/Greentext

Anonymous SPTSPAN 11/12/22(Sat)07:57:07 No.888950927 JESSE JAMES BANK MUSEUM EB6F9F1F-FAED-4FAF-A684-5714341DA5CD.jpg 45 KB JPG walk in > tell the docents to put 'em up > it's a robbery > "sir, this is a museum, not a bank" > demand all of their brochures > "don't be a hero, just put the goods in the bag" > now I've got all of the brochures
Anonymous SPTSPAN 11/12/22(Sat)07:57:07 No.888950927 JESSE JAMES BANK MUSEUM EB6F9F1F-FAED-4FAF-A684-5714341DA5CD.jpg 45 KB JPG walk in > tell the docents to put 'em up > it's a robbery > "sir, this is a museum, not a bank" > demand all of their brochures > "don't be a hero, just put the goods in the bag" > now I've got all of the brochures

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 18 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat)07:04:09 No.173641010 >university only has intersex toilets >have to poop >lock the door and get to business >lock was actually broken >girl accidently walked in as I was unloading a massive s--- Whoever thought that these toilets were a good idea is an idiot 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
Anonymous 18 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat)07:04:09 No.173641010 >university only has intersex toilets >have to poop >lock the door and get to business >lock was actually broken >girl accidently walked in as I was unloading a massive s--- Whoever thought that these toilets were a good idea is an idiot 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon is under a wrong impression | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 30 KB JPG 01/06/22(Thu)19:55:09 No.66876081 >First day of college, orientation day >Nurse is going around handing out condoms to everyone >Makes eye contact with me, pauses for a brief second >Doesn't give me one She wanted me to do her raw, r-right
: Anonymous 30 KB JPG 01/06/22(Thu)19:55:09 No.66876081 >First day of college, orientation day >Nurse is going around handing out condoms to everyone >Makes eye contact with me, pauses for a brief second >Doesn't give me one She wanted me to do her raw, r-right

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Anon school | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous School 08/24/22(Wed)11:23:29 No.884460822 >be me, high school >Don't know s--- in class >Decide to download an app to cheat >The app takes me to a YouTube channel where a guy tells me answers and explains how to do the problem so I can pass the tests >I use this to get through high school Did anyone else cheat like this? 142 KB PNG 08/24/22(Wed)11:24:42 No.884460867 Anonymous >>884460822 (OP) # W-- are you on about? : Anonymous You literally just learned.. with extra steps 08/24/22(Wed)11:24:50 No.884460873
: Anonymous School 08/24/22(Wed)11:23:29 No.884460822 >be me, high school >Don't know s--- in class >Decide to download an app to cheat >The app takes me to a YouTube channel where a guy tells me answers and explains how to do the problem so I can pass the tests >I use this to get through high school Did anyone else cheat like this? 142 KB PNG 08/24/22(Wed)11:24:42 No.884460867 Anonymous >>884460822 (OP) # W-- are you on about? : Anonymous You literally just learned.. with extra steps 08/24/22(Wed)11:24:50 No.884460873

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Anon cums to Rami Malek | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 109 KB JPG 11/11/22(Fri)22:25:25 No.888929440 >Be 17 gf 16 go to the movies to see Night at the museum >late showing so theater empty >both horny af >tell her to sit on my lap and raise skirt >lower her panties she starts grinding me >she asks for condom tell her I forgot to bring >into the pooper it goes >she takes it like a champ >starts riding me really hard >close to c------ close eyes >I grab her by the waist she is 5'0 very light >basically use her as a living fleshlight >rami malek appears on screen as I c-- >weird c-- my gf presses down real hard feel my peen go in really deep >after balls empty she stays for 5 mins on top of me while im inside her ass >we hear theater doors open she gets off and asscum drips all over my lap >couple sits next to us >mfw watched movie with c-- drying on my pants
: Anonymous 109 KB JPG 11/11/22(Fri)22:25:25 No.888929440 >Be 17 gf 16 go to the movies to see Night at the museum >late showing so theater empty >both horny af >tell her to sit on my lap and raise skirt >lower her panties she starts grinding me >she asks for condom tell her I forgot to bring >into the pooper it goes >she takes it like a champ >starts riding me really hard >close to c------ close eyes >I grab her by the waist she is 5'0 very light >basically use her as a living fleshlight >rami malek appears on screen as I c-- >weird c-- my gf presses down real hard feel my peen go in really deep >after balls empty she stays for 5 mins on top of me while im inside her ass >we hear theater doors open she gets off and asscum drips all over my lap >couple sits next to us >mfw watched movie with c-- drying on my pants

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Anon is in a midlife crisis | /r/Greentext

07/04/17(Tue)09:52:59 No.38148964 >it'll get better in high school >it'll get better in college >it'l' get better in university >it will get better when i have a job 142 KB PNG >ive wasted my entire f------ life, my youth is gone ive missed out on love and any important milestones in a normal persons life : Anonymous View Thread
07/04/17(Tue)09:52:59 No.38148964 >it'll get better in high school >it'll get better in college >it'l' get better in university >it will get better when i have a job 142 KB PNG >ive wasted my entire f------ life, my youth is gone ive missed out on love and any important milestones in a normal persons life : Anonymous View Thread

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Kissing cousin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 31 KB JPG 05/28/22(Sat) 19:14:21 No.68820108 >be me >have retarded bimbo cousin come over >stay in my room as much as possible to avoid her, mostly studying or playing games >she comes in my room while im playing >"heyyyyyy anonnnnn, can i talk to your friends? theyd looove me" >she puts on my headphones and tries "seducing" (?) my friends >obviously doesnt work, so she becomes super hostile >"you fat f----, total losers", spewing random insults at them >one of them replies back "anon called you a burden" >she begins crying and screaming at me, goes to complain to her mother How the f--- do people like her exist? I'm ashamed to be related to her. I feel bad I let my friends listen to her b-------
: Anonymous 31 KB JPG 05/28/22(Sat) 19:14:21 No.68820108 >be me >have retarded bimbo cousin come over >stay in my room as much as possible to avoid her, mostly studying or playing games >she comes in my room while im playing >"heyyyyyy anonnnnn, can i talk to your friends? theyd looove me" >she puts on my headphones and tries "seducing" (?) my friends >obviously doesnt work, so she becomes super hostile >"you fat f----, total losers", spewing random insults at them >one of them replies back "anon called you a burden" >she begins crying and screaming at me, goes to complain to her mother How the f--- do people like her exist? I'm ashamed to be related to her. I feel bad I let my friends listen to her b-------

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Anon scores low on a test | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 30 KB JPG low iq idiot. 11/09/22(Wed)17:08:07 No.70916511 >took a professional iq test >scored an 84 does this mean I should give up on life? I mean the test was just a bunch of f------ scribbles and guessing. Is the growth mindset a good mindset because right now it feels like the growth mindset is b------- and I'm a
: Anonymous 30 KB JPG low iq idiot. 11/09/22(Wed)17:08:07 No.70916511 >took a professional iq test >scored an 84 does this mean I should give up on life? I mean the test was just a bunch of f------ scribbles and guessing. Is the growth mindset a good mindset because right now it feels like the growth mindset is b------- and I'm a

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Anon likes bananas | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Ban the P--- 11/11/22(Fri) 13:35:58 No.888890926 >A banana is an elongated, edible fruit (botanically a berry) produced by several kinds of large herbaceous flowering plants in the genus Musa. >Bananas are a staple starch for many tropical populations. Depending upon cultivar and ripeness, the flesh can vary in taste from starchy to sweet, and texture from firm to mushy. Both the skin and inner part can be eaten raw or cooked. 271 KB PNG >In addition to being eaten raw, bananas are eaten deep fried, baked in their skin in a split bamboo, or steamed in glutinous rice wrapped in a banana leaf. View Thread
: Anonymous Ban the P--- 11/11/22(Fri) 13:35:58 No.888890926 >A banana is an elongated, edible fruit (botanically a berry) produced by several kinds of large herbaceous flowering plants in the genus Musa. >Bananas are a staple starch for many tropical populations. Depending upon cultivar and ripeness, the flesh can vary in taste from starchy to sweet, and texture from firm to mushy. Both the skin and inner part can be eaten raw or cooked. 271 KB PNG >In addition to being eaten raw, bananas are eaten deep fried, baked in their skin in a split bamboo, or steamed in glutinous rice wrapped in a banana leaf. View Thread

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bruh moment when gangnam style | /r/Greentext

Anonymous| 46019378 6,5 kB JPG 37 perccel ezelőtt ... EPIC GANGNAM STYLE CRINGE STORY >Be me, 12 years old >Gangnam style is top of the charts everywhere >Teacher approaches me and my cousin for a special gangnam request >She asks us to dance to gangnam style when they play it in assembly so that other people will join in >The time comes, music starts >OPPA GANGNAM STYLE >Me and my cousin both start doing le epic gangnam style dance >1000+ students in the hall, nobody joins in... > People are staring, we keep going > Eventually the music stops and nobody ever mentions what just happened ever again, thank f---
Anonymous| 46019378 6,5 kB JPG 37 perccel ezelőtt ... EPIC GANGNAM STYLE CRINGE STORY >Be me, 12 years old >Gangnam style is top of the charts everywhere >Teacher approaches me and my cousin for a special gangnam request >She asks us to dance to gangnam style when they play it in assembly so that other people will join in >The time comes, music starts >OPPA GANGNAM STYLE >Me and my cousin both start doing le epic gangnam style dance >1000+ students in the hall, nobody joins in... > People are staring, we keep going > Eventually the music stops and nobody ever mentions what just happened ever again, thank f---

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Can confirm it works. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous akinator 14 KB JPG >profit 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences
: Anonymous akinator 14 KB JPG >profit 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences

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pedo hunter... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Jpy0pvu8 Unfathomably Based Thread 06/19/21 (Sat)02:09:23 No.326552993 >trusted local man kidnaps his son >takes boy to motel and rapes him >the r----- gets caught by the cops >father goes to the local bars and find out when the r----- will be brought back to town >local guy who worked for media lets him know the time and place >arrives at the airport and waits for cops to arrive with r----- >live TV crews also at the scene 1.05 MB GIF >cops and r----- walking through airport >pulls out a pistol and shoots his son's r----- straight through the head, killing him with a single shot >father literally assassinates his son's r----- on live television (pic related) >gets arrested >local community unanimously decides he's not guilty of any crime and is a hero >goes to court >judge doesn't convict him, only gets 300 hours community service >carries on and lives his life as normal, and is forever regarded as a hero His name was Gary Plauché. Say his name /pol/.
: Anonymous (ID: Jpy0pvu8 Unfathomably Based Thread 06/19/21 (Sat)02:09:23 No.326552993 >trusted local man kidnaps his son >takes boy to motel and rapes him >the r----- gets caught by the cops >father goes to the local bars and find out when the r----- will be brought back to town >local guy who worked for media lets him know the time and place >arrives at the airport and waits for cops to arrive with r----- >live TV crews also at the scene 1.05 MB GIF >cops and r----- walking through airport >pulls out a pistol and shoots his son's r----- straight through the head, killing him with a single shot >father literally assassinates his son's r----- on live television (pic related) >gets arrested >local community unanimously decides he's not guilty of any crime and is a hero >goes to court >judge doesn't convict him, only gets 300 hours community service >carries on and lives his life as normal, and is forever regarded as a hero His name was Gary Plauché. Say his name /pol/.

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Anon gets a visit from the Ghostbusters | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/02/15(Sun)14:13:20 No.59484314 >>59484351 >>59484376 >>59484493 >>59484588 >>59484933 >>59485128 >>59485712 >>59485924 >>59486195 >>59486254 >>59486967 >>59487526 >>59489001 >be 8 >terminal brain cancer >make a wish ask me what my dream is >I want to meet my favourite ghostbuster >big day comes >can't wait to meet Bill Murray >"We managed to get all four of them to come anon, isn't that great?" >4? But Harold Ramis is dead. >The door opens and I hear shrill laughter and mumbled ebonics >Four women shamble in to the room wearing cheap cosplay outfits. >The largest, a barely human looking sheboon swaggers over to me looking like she thinks she's made my day >"Who ya gun call lil guy?" >The rest of them roar with laughter >I hear a voice screaming "Ay gurls, lemme holla at ya" >A strange n---- runs in to my room and starts whooping. >The 4 women begin to whoop along with him and chant "PHOTO OP, PHOTO OP" >A camera flashes as I drift in to the abyss
Anonymous 08/02/15(Sun)14:13:20 No.59484314 >>59484351 >>59484376 >>59484493 >>59484588 >>59484933 >>59485128 >>59485712 >>59485924 >>59486195 >>59486254 >>59486967 >>59487526 >>59489001 >be 8 >terminal brain cancer >make a wish ask me what my dream is >I want to meet my favourite ghostbuster >big day comes >can't wait to meet Bill Murray >"We managed to get all four of them to come anon, isn't that great?" >4? But Harold Ramis is dead. >The door opens and I hear shrill laughter and mumbled ebonics >Four women shamble in to the room wearing cheap cosplay outfits. >The largest, a barely human looking sheboon swaggers over to me looking like she thinks she's made my day >"Who ya gun call lil guy?" >The rest of them roar with laughter >I hear a voice screaming "Ay gurls, lemme holla at ya" >A strange n---- runs in to my room and starts whooping. >The 4 women begin to whoop along with him and chant "PHOTO OP, PHOTO OP" >A camera flashes as I drift in to the abyss

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Zoomers did 911 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/01/22(Wed)02:57:12 No.68863410 RE N Cas 28403582-FCB5-4929-A194-7761686666F1.jpg 80 KB JPG No cap sir a plane has deadass crashed into the world trade center and another one into the mf pentagon no cap the situation is NOT bussin 06/01/22(Wed)02:59:18 No.68863436 Anonymous >>68863410 (OP) # >you say the jet fuel melted the steel beams? Kinda sus fr fr no cap on God
Anonymous 06/01/22(Wed)02:57:12 No.68863410 RE N Cas 28403582-FCB5-4929-A194-7761686666F1.jpg 80 KB JPG No cap sir a plane has deadass crashed into the world trade center and another one into the mf pentagon no cap the situation is NOT bussin 06/01/22(Wed)02:59:18 No.68863436 Anonymous >>68863410 (OP) # >you say the jet fuel melted the steel beams? Kinda sus fr fr no cap on God

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does this count ? | /r/Greentext

oldzoomer.jpg 136 KB JPG >>617848234 (OP) # >>617849716 # prettycooltim >fortnite & battle royale was da s--- back then bruh >so much nostalgia cuh >kidz deez days r missin out fr fr no cap
oldzoomer.jpg 136 KB JPG >>617848234 (OP) # >>617849716 # prettycooltim >fortnite & battle royale was da s--- back then bruh >so much nostalgia cuh >kidz deez days r missin out fr fr no cap

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