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Anon mocks pc players | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)19:47:28 No.554623690 >4k with ray tracing enabled > NO0O IT DROPS A FEW FRAMES UNPLAYABLE shut the f--- up 201 KB PNG
: Anonymous 05/06/21(Thu)19:47:28 No.554623690 >4k with ray tracing enabled > NO0O IT DROPS A FEW FRAMES UNPLAYABLE shut the f--- up 201 KB PNG

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Anon gets leaked | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:38:10 No.63572031 >massive 4chan data leak happens >IPs for every post are leaked >they can now all be traced back to you What do in this situation? 21 KB JPG 13 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:46:14 No.63572130 >yeah i made all those racist, sexist, antisemetic, gay shitposts. What are you going to do about it? Cry? 229 KB PNG >>63572211 # : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:47:01 No.63572143 : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:50:54 No.63572193 : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:52:37 No.63572211 >>63572130 # >No, you're just going to lose your job. >Also, you can't be within 300 meters of a school. >>63572234 # : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:54:23 No.63572234 >>63572211 # >Lose my what? >Why would i want to go to a school?
: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:38:10 No.63572031 >massive 4chan data leak happens >IPs for every post are leaked >they can now all be traced back to you What do in this situation? 21 KB JPG 13 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:46:14 No.63572130 >yeah i made all those racist, sexist, antisemetic, gay shitposts. What are you going to do about it? Cry? 229 KB PNG >>63572211 # : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:47:01 No.63572143 : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:50:54 No.63572193 : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:52:37 No.63572211 >>63572130 # >No, you're just going to lose your job. >Also, you can't be within 300 meters of a school. >>63572234 # : Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)21:54:23 No.63572234 >>63572211 # >Lose my what? >Why would i want to go to a school?

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Anon is on autopilot | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/27721(Tue)02:02:40 Nó.61176759 >>61173933 (OP) # F--- I can actually relate to this >first month in gym >getting used to talking with people, gym lingo, not being intimidated by people using the weights etc 30 KB JPG >need to take a mad s--- >go to the bathroom, all the stalls are occupied >brain is on full autopilot >knock and ask the guy "how many sets do you have left in there" >realize what I just said >hear the guy inside say what the f--- man >all others laughing >run out and don't come back for a few days >realize no one found out It still keeps me up at night bros >>61176799 # >>61176803 # >>61176818 # >>61176835 # >>61176906 # >>61177071 # >>61177082 # >>61177707 # >>61178136 # >>61178305 #
: Anonymous 04/27721(Tue)02:02:40 Nó.61176759 >>61173933 (OP) # F--- I can actually relate to this >first month in gym >getting used to talking with people, gym lingo, not being intimidated by people using the weights etc 30 KB JPG >need to take a mad s--- >go to the bathroom, all the stalls are occupied >brain is on full autopilot >knock and ask the guy "how many sets do you have left in there" >realize what I just said >hear the guy inside say what the f--- man >all others laughing >run out and don't come back for a few days >realize no one found out It still keeps me up at night bros >>61176799 # >>61176803 # >>61176818 # >>61176835 # >>61176906 # >>61177071 # >>61177082 # >>61177707 # >>61178136 # >>61178305 #

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Anon was high | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.643622648 1 hour ago High stories? >Be me, 17 >Going on a boat ride with my 2 bros >High as f--- off brownies >Sitting in some aluminum cheap ass chairs waiting >Taking it all in >Suddenly realize there's something between my thighs >Oh f--- I shat myself >Pretty f------ disappointed in myself >How the f--- did this happen >Walk to the bathroom awkwardly so the s--- nugget doesn't fall out of my shorts >Bathroom is near the booth to get the tickets >Huge crowd >F--- man I'm too high for this. >Have to pass through people whilst also trying to keep my legs closed. >For a high person this is very frustrating >Get in bathroom >mfw it was just my balls >mfw I spent 20 mins getting to the bathroom >mfw I have no face
Anonymous No.643622648 1 hour ago High stories? >Be me, 17 >Going on a boat ride with my 2 bros >High as f--- off brownies >Sitting in some aluminum cheap ass chairs waiting >Taking it all in >Suddenly realize there's something between my thighs >Oh f--- I shat myself >Pretty f------ disappointed in myself >How the f--- did this happen >Walk to the bathroom awkwardly so the s--- nugget doesn't fall out of my shorts >Bathroom is near the booth to get the tickets >Huge crowd >F--- man I'm too high for this. >Have to pass through people whilst also trying to keep my legs closed. >For a high person this is very frustrating >Get in bathroom >mfw it was just my balls >mfw I spent 20 mins getting to the bathroom >mfw I have no face

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Anon joins the military. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)16:21:07 No.853879669 >Be me. >Join the Army at 18 to move away from home and become my own man. Decide to go Infantry to kick in doors and kill. Badass s---. >Make friends unlike any others. Bonding like you would never bond with anyone 9 KB JPG anywhere else. Going through s--- that most can't even image, dangers that most only see in the movies. A lifelong bond. >Get deployed to Iraq right after invasion. >Lose several friends in the deployment, hits where it hurts something deep. >Lose several more friends the next deployment. Even my own 1SG shooting himself in the head right in front of us because we are losing so many. >Things are getting out of hand. >Friends are leaving, getting stationed elsewhere, getting out. Haven't made many friends after. >Met a cool SGT in my next unit, same rank and interests as me. He lives right next door to me. Invite him over to meet wife and kids and play MTG. He begins teaching me to play guitar. Get real close. He's a mechanic, so small chance he can die. >Deploy to Afghanistan. >Guy dies trying to recover a stuck vehicle in the beginning of the deployment. >FF to today. 40 years old disabled vet with bad leg and back, PTSD, TBI. >Feeling kind of lonely, have nothing in common with anyone around me, nothing to talk about. >Wife's friends think I'm weird because my humor is dark. Humor had to be dark because you learn to laugh at it or be consumed. >Talk with VA who say I need social structures outside of family like spots, which I hurt too much to play, church, with the things l've seen there can't possibly be a “loving" god, or with other vets. >Meet other vets but hate them mostly. Can't say why. Don't know what to do. >Beginning to think that l'll never have any friends. Too scared to. Every friend of mine is dead by war or by suicide. Is this why people thank me for my service?
: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)16:21:07 No.853879669 >Be me. >Join the Army at 18 to move away from home and become my own man. Decide to go Infantry to kick in doors and kill. Badass s---. >Make friends unlike any others. Bonding like you would never bond with anyone 9 KB JPG anywhere else. Going through s--- that most can't even image, dangers that most only see in the movies. A lifelong bond. >Get deployed to Iraq right after invasion. >Lose several friends in the deployment, hits where it hurts something deep. >Lose several more friends the next deployment. Even my own 1SG shooting himself in the head right in front of us because we are losing so many. >Things are getting out of hand. >Friends are leaving, getting stationed elsewhere, getting out. Haven't made many friends after. >Met a cool SGT in my next unit, same rank and interests as me. He lives right next door to me. Invite him over to meet wife and kids and play MTG. He begins teaching me to play guitar. Get real close. He's a mechanic, so small chance he can die. >Deploy to Afghanistan. >Guy dies trying to recover a stuck vehicle in the beginning of the deployment. >FF to today. 40 years old disabled vet with bad leg and back, PTSD, TBI. >Feeling kind of lonely, have nothing in common with anyone around me, nothing to talk about. >Wife's friends think I'm weird because my humor is dark. Humor had to be dark because you learn to laugh at it or be consumed. >Talk with VA who say I need social structures outside of family like spots, which I hurt too much to play, church, with the things l've seen there can't possibly be a “loving" god, or with other vets. >Meet other vets but hate them mostly. Can't say why. Don't know what to do. >Beginning to think that l'll never have any friends. Too scared to. Every friend of mine is dead by war or by suicide. Is this why people thank me for my service?

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anon got a critical hit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)19:43:23 No.554686786 File: 1617048593725.jpg (6 KB, 236x285) >vending machine stole a dollar >smack the machine on the side >critical hit >all the snacks fall down
Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)19:43:23 No.554686786 File: 1617048593725.jpg (6 KB, 236x285) >vending machine stole a dollar >smack the machine on the side >critical hit >all the snacks fall down

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Anon is abusing a tranny. | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)20:08:58 No.853872049 >be me >14 >playing cricket in gym class >balls thrown at trans kid >didn't catch it >friend said "at least try next time you f------ t-----" >trans kid just stood there and started 8 KB JPG to cry >l fell to the floor laughing >my teacher screamed at us both and we got put in exclusion all day >it was put into our permanent records as "LGBTQ abuse and harassment"
: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)20:08:58 No.853872049 >be me >14 >playing cricket in gym class >balls thrown at trans kid >didn't catch it >friend said "at least try next time you f------ t-----" >trans kid just stood there and started 8 KB JPG to cry >l fell to the floor laughing >my teacher screamed at us both and we got put in exclusion all day >it was put into our permanent records as "LGBTQ abuse and harassment"

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Anon recall halloween | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ? 10/31/18(Wed)18:44:49 No.6799421 >1993 >older boy in neighborhood is always playing pranks >Halloween night he puts out huge bowl of candy >bowl sits in chair in the center of the yard with a sign that reads "please take only one piece" >kid hides in house upstairs with the lights off >spends night shooting at people who take more than one piece with a BB gun from a cracked open second story window.
: Anonymous ? 10/31/18(Wed)18:44:49 No.6799421 >1993 >older boy in neighborhood is always playing pranks >Halloween night he puts out huge bowl of candy >bowl sits in chair in the center of the yard with a sign that reads "please take only one piece" >kid hides in house upstairs with the lights off >spends night shooting at people who take more than one piece with a BB gun from a cracked open second story window.

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Anon has a weird body | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)08:14:31 No.853856286 >be me RS >struggle keeping a decent sleep schedule Ci get on a normal schedule >keep at it for a good few days >feel energetic early in the morning and >finally after weeks of training my body 32 KB JPG sleepy at around 9pm every night| >start feeling drowsy at around 2pm one day "Ive got work in a few hours, and l've been doing good at sleeping at normal times recently. Might as well treat myself to a short power nap" >take half hour nap at mid day >l've now been wide awake for 32 hours straight Why is my body like this?
: Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)08:14:31 No.853856286 >be me RS >struggle keeping a decent sleep schedule Ci get on a normal schedule >keep at it for a good few days >feel energetic early in the morning and >finally after weeks of training my body 32 KB JPG sleepy at around 9pm every night| >start feeling drowsy at around 2pm one day "Ive got work in a few hours, and l've been doing good at sleeping at normal times recently. Might as well treat myself to a short power nap" >take half hour nap at mid day >l've now been wide awake for 32 hours straight Why is my body like this?

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I can fit 13 crumpets up my ass | /r/Greentext

Typical everyday average British morning: >wake up >bobby knocks on door >"oi! open up you cheeky bastard and show me your 47 KB JPG sleeping licence!" >fumble around and finally find my licence >"s-sorry good sir. It's right here... God save the Queen." >bobby peers in and catches a glimpse of me telly >"halt! where's your TV licence you c---?!" >"draw TV licence from me wallet" >bobby gives a look like the bloody Queen's dodger >"oi mate! where's your permit for this licence?" >show him my licence permit >"this licence permit is expired. I'm taking you in!" >bobby draws his toy gun >stab him with my unregistered butterknife
Typical everyday average British morning: >wake up >bobby knocks on door >"oi! open up you cheeky bastard and show me your 47 KB JPG sleeping licence!" >fumble around and finally find my licence >"s-sorry good sir. It's right here... God save the Queen." >bobby peers in and catches a glimpse of me telly >"halt! where's your TV licence you c---?!" >"draw TV licence from me wallet" >bobby gives a look like the bloody Queen's dodger >"oi mate! where's your permit for this licence?" >show him my licence permit >"this licence permit is expired. I'm taking you in!" >bobby draws his toy gun >stab him with my unregistered butterknife

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Anon forgets that gamers like tards | /r/Greentext

12/11/18(Tue)00:32:50 No.49786155 Anonymous lel >play csgo >really good at game but no one adds me >send friend requests >never get befriended pic unrelated but wanted to give something in return for your ears 178 KB JPG >try small talk >get ignored >chad brother comes over to apt >"got any games on your pc?" >boot up csgo for him >does horrible in the competitive match >just spends his game laughing while dying >and talking s--- >name calling >blaming team mates Next day in the morning I see I got 7 friend requests from the people he was playing with
12/11/18(Tue)00:32:50 No.49786155 Anonymous lel >play csgo >really good at game but no one adds me >send friend requests >never get befriended pic unrelated but wanted to give something in return for your ears 178 KB JPG >try small talk >get ignored >chad brother comes over to apt >"got any games on your pc?" >boot up csgo for him >does horrible in the competitive match >just spends his game laughing while dying >and talking s--- >name calling >blaming team mates Next day in the morning I see I got 7 friend requests from the people he was playing with

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> thought i had to eat the whole thing | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/04/17(Tue)19:11:53 No.8771033 >two weeks ago >make thread asking how to eat these >today >Can't stop eating these Why did you uncage this demon 2.79 MB JPG 18 Replies /1 Image View Thread Anonymous 04/04/17(Tue)19:13:07 No.8771037 >asking how to eat sunflower seeds are you more stupid than a bird
Anonymous 04/04/17(Tue)19:11:53 No.8771033 >two weeks ago >make thread asking how to eat these >today >Can't stop eating these Why did you uncage this demon 2.79 MB JPG 18 Replies /1 Image View Thread Anonymous 04/04/17(Tue)19:13:07 No.8771037 >asking how to eat sunflower seeds are you more stupid than a bird

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OP finds a possum | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/27/13(Wed)05:01 No.55852 >be 16 >hear dogs obviously attacking something in back yard >go out and get them to leave it alone >oh s--- it's a bloody 33 KB PNG >think Its dead, go to put it in garbage >notice Its still breathing >decide to put it out of it's misery >grab a broken skateboard and smash it over it's head unssod >possum starts convulsing >oh god why aren't you dying >keep beating it >feel like Christopher bale killing Jared letto In American psycho >it finally dies >check the body and see the dogs barely scratched It >mfw I remember possums play dead
Anonymous 03/27/13(Wed)05:01 No.55852 >be 16 >hear dogs obviously attacking something in back yard >go out and get them to leave it alone >oh s--- it's a bloody 33 KB PNG >think Its dead, go to put it in garbage >notice Its still breathing >decide to put it out of it's misery >grab a broken skateboard and smash it over it's head unssod >possum starts convulsing >oh god why aren't you dying >keep beating it >feel like Christopher bale killing Jared letto In American psycho >it finally dies >check the body and see the dogs barely scratched It >mfw I remember possums play dead

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Anon is lonely | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/30/17(Fri)14:19:33 No.3806115 >teacher assigns you a female partner >she is visibly upset >38061228 # >>38061362 # >>38061387 # >>38062246 # >>38062251 # >>38063036 # >>38063288 # >>38063910 # >>38064091 #
: Anonymous 06/30/17(Fri)14:19:33 No.3806115 >teacher assigns you a female partner >she is visibly upset >38061228 # >>38061362 # >>38061387 # >>38062246 # >>38062251 # >>38063036 # >>38063288 # >>38063910 # >>38064091 #

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Anon is gay | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No. 49384163 (3 m) >be me >have one shot at life >born gay in iran mfw PNG 429.57 KB
Anonymous No. 49384163 (3 m) >be me >have one shot at life >born gay in iran mfw PNG 429.57 KB

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Anon Hustles | /r/Greentext

04/27/21(Tue)19:05:05 No.6341537: >Go on Onlyfans >Tip for 500$ worth of personal content >Open bank dispute once girl sends content >Get money back and resell her content to simps
04/27/21(Tue)19:05:05 No.6341537: >Go on Onlyfans >Tip for 500$ worth of personal content >Open bank dispute once girl sends content >Get money back and resell her content to simps

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Anon is bad in real life | /r/Greentext

E500C3AB-FCBD-4C06-B75F-F3DC53E35607.png 58 KB PNG >walk into Subway by myself >forget im in real life >see white woman >audibly say "white woman spotted"
E500C3AB-FCBD-4C06-B75F-F3DC53E35607.png 58 KB PNG >walk into Subway by myself >forget im in real life >see white woman >audibly say "white woman spotted"

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Anon makes a big splash | /r/Greentext


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Anon is nostalgic | /r/Greentext


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Anon gets saved | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: boi8mKM9 ) 04/25/14(Fri)14:11:39 No.543818057 > Be year 2040, women rule the world > Rihanna is their leader > Be stuck in concentration camp for men > Rihanna killing all the dudes 83 KB PNG because they found a way to reproduce without us > Group of us overpower gaurdesses > Be running > Get surrounded > standoff.PNG > all of a sudden a masked hero appears, with his schlong flapping in the wind > beats up all the women > sets all the dudes free > much wow, many thanks > takes mask off > mfw it was Chris Brown
Anonymous (ID: boi8mKM9 ) 04/25/14(Fri)14:11:39 No.543818057 > Be year 2040, women rule the world > Rihanna is their leader > Be stuck in concentration camp for men > Rihanna killing all the dudes 83 KB PNG because they found a way to reproduce without us > Group of us overpower gaurdesses > Be running > Get surrounded > standoff.PNG > all of a sudden a masked hero appears, with his schlong flapping in the wind > beats up all the women > sets all the dudes free > much wow, many thanks > takes mask off > mfw it was Chris Brown

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