Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Anon takes in a movie | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/26/14(Sun)23:45:49 No.29298147 >ask girl out on a date >she says yes sask her what time her dad can drive us to the movies >she just gives me a blank stare 153 KB JPG >ok well you guys should pick me up around 7 >give her fist bump and run home in excitement >her and her dad pick me up around 7 >no one says a word on the way there >he drops us off >as I'm getting out of the car I stop and ask him for the money for the movie >he just stares at me >politely inform him movies don't grow on trees >he gives me $30 >l clear my throat and keep my hand out >he gives me another $10 >I roll my eyes and "thanks, guy" really sarcastically >girl I asked out is looking super embarrassed >get to the ticket window >did your dad give you any money for the movie? >she looks like she's about to cry >well you should call him because he only gave me enough for myself and some food >we didn't go on a second date
Anonymous 10/26/14(Sun)23:45:49 No.29298147 >ask girl out on a date >she says yes sask her what time her dad can drive us to the movies >she just gives me a blank stare 153 KB JPG >ok well you guys should pick me up around 7 >give her fist bump and run home in excitement >her and her dad pick me up around 7 >no one says a word on the way there >he drops us off >as I'm getting out of the car I stop and ask him for the money for the movie >he just stares at me >politely inform him movies don't grow on trees >he gives me $30 >l clear my throat and keep my hand out >he gives me another $10 >I roll my eyes and "thanks, guy" really sarcastically >girl I asked out is looking super embarrassed >get to the ticket window >did your dad give you any money for the movie? >she looks like she's about to cry >well you should call him because he only gave me enough for myself and some food >we didn't go on a second date

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon works | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)15:11:46 No.849659169 >be me >work as a phone salesman >95% of calls are old peope >nobody ever actually buys anything >get paid per time spent in calls >most old people are lonely and 110 КВ PNG just want to talk >talk to old people about how they water their plants for hours >basically everyone at my job just talks to old people for 12 hours a day >even have regular callers that know us by names >supposed to advertise products but i actually just talk to grandma Lauren every day for 8 hours about how she used to live back in the day >she appears to forget what she said, repeats the same thing 10s of times. >my job is basically to register when Lauren made a pause in her speech and say "Very interesting, keep going"
: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)15:11:46 No.849659169 >be me >work as a phone salesman >95% of calls are old peope >nobody ever actually buys anything >get paid per time spent in calls >most old people are lonely and 110 КВ PNG just want to talk >talk to old people about how they water their plants for hours >basically everyone at my job just talks to old people for 12 hours a day >even have regular callers that know us by names >supposed to advertise products but i actually just talk to grandma Lauren every day for 8 hours about how she used to live back in the day >she appears to forget what she said, repeats the same thing 10s of times. >my job is basically to register when Lauren made a pause in her speech and say "Very interesting, keep going"

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is no longer depressed | /r/Greentext

Hitler plays among us 09/25/20(Fri)18:20:59 No.526132461 >Be me sick & depressed loser >Play among us >Name myself "Der Führer" >shitsandgiggles.jpeg >Go to Euro f-- servers >Join game 11 KB GIF >Players see name >Everyone says "heil hitler" >mfw when playing with actual nazis >Random f-- calls me sus >Everyone votes him out >Everyone says "heil" >Thirdreich.mp4 >Emergency meetings left and right >Purging un loyal players >Players say "what do >"Take him to ze camp" you think my führer" %3D >mfw when I'm actually important in life >Players say "heil" every meeting >No heil = sus >Horrified I turned game into nazi germany >shitmypants.zip >Imposter sent to camp >Game finishes >Decide that's enough games >Become cured >No longer sick & depressed
Hitler plays among us 09/25/20(Fri)18:20:59 No.526132461 >Be me sick & depressed loser >Play among us >Name myself "Der Führer" >shitsandgiggles.jpeg >Go to Euro f-- servers >Join game 11 KB GIF >Players see name >Everyone says "heil hitler" >mfw when playing with actual nazis >Random f-- calls me sus >Everyone votes him out >Everyone says "heil" >Thirdreich.mp4 >Emergency meetings left and right >Purging un loyal players >Players say "what do >"Take him to ze camp" you think my führer" %3D >mfw when I'm actually important in life >Players say "heil" every meeting >No heil = sus >Horrified I turned game into nazi germany >shitmypants.zip >Imposter sent to camp >Game finishes >Decide that's enough games >Become cured >No longer sick & depressed

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is getting old | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 49679001 16 mins ago •.. >tfw you ask people how old do they think you are and they say 30 >tfw I was offered a seat on the bus yesterday I'm only 27 I still have time.. 181.9 kB JPG
Anonymous | 49679001 16 mins ago •.. >tfw you ask people how old do they think you are and they say 30 >tfw I was offered a seat on the bus yesterday I'm only 27 I still have time.. 181.9 kB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext plant terrestrial plant font line fruit tree

anon is a excited easily | /r/Greentext

File: CA08378A-9CA4-4340-BA25-6(...).jpg (289 KB, 640x663) EXODUS 17A/ U Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)16:56:51 No.849605257 [Reply] >girl looks at me and smiles >i immediately get an erection what the f--- have i become
File: CA08378A-9CA4-4340-BA25-6(...).jpg (289 KB, 640x663) EXODUS 17A/ U Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)16:56:51 No.849605257 [Reply] >girl looks at me and smiles >i immediately get an erection what the f--- have i become

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext among us smile erection aroused

Anon is born | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)11:07:36 No.849648570 >one chance at life >born in Bosnia and Herzegovina 45 KB JPG
: Anonymous 03/15/21(Mon)11:07:36 No.849648570 >one chance at life >born in Bosnia and Herzegovina 45 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font

Anon has a hot mom | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon was happy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/23/20(Sun)08:59:18 No.56866189 >be me, lonely guy >go out at night walking around my city >suddenly see a group of people >go up to them and start a conversation, we hit it off >everyone finds me funny and nice, 8 KB JPG there are a few girls in the group as well who are into me >we all grab some beers and go to a park and sit on the grass >sit with them for three hours, it feels like no time has passed at all >at the end we make a group chat on WhatsApp and plan to meet up again >happiest l've felt in years >wake up
: Anonymous 02/23/20(Sun)08:59:18 No.56866189 >be me, lonely guy >go out at night walking around my city >suddenly see a group of people >go up to them and start a conversation, we hit it off >everyone finds me funny and nice, 8 KB JPG there are a few girls in the group as well who are into me >we all grab some beers and go to a park and sit on the grass >sit with them for three hours, it feels like no time has passed at all >at the end we make a group chat on WhatsApp and plan to meet up again >happiest l've felt in years >wake up

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon has lucid dream | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/23/21(Sat)11:13:36 No.27427172 >read a thread on a ritual that supposedly allows you to lucid dream >attempt it >it actually works >l can lucid dream 56 KB JPG >all I have to do is say something and it happens >if I say "I can fly" I can fly >if I were to say "I used to be President" | immediately flashback to my time in office >other characters appear in my dream >they start having flashbacks of their own >I can't control them >l have to stick to the script until their flashbacks are over >Peter Griffin is a character in my dreams >l have no power over him >every time he has a flashback I'm force to play along >every night I'm trapped in an episode of Family Guy >become terrified of sleeping >eventually my body caves and I fall asleep >every night I'm subjected to a hellscape of pop culture references and poop jokes 14 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 01/23/21(Sat)11:13:36 No.27427172 >read a thread on a ritual that supposedly allows you to lucid dream >attempt it >it actually works >l can lucid dream 56 KB JPG >all I have to do is say something and it happens >if I say "I can fly" I can fly >if I were to say "I used to be President" | immediately flashback to my time in office >other characters appear in my dream >they start having flashbacks of their own >I can't control them >l have to stick to the script until their flashbacks are over >Peter Griffin is a character in my dreams >l have no power over him >every time he has a flashback I'm force to play along >every night I'm trapped in an episode of Family Guy >become terrified of sleeping >eventually my body caves and I fall asleep >every night I'm subjected to a hellscape of pop culture references and poop jokes 14 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon likes pizza | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/27/19(Sun)22:25:39 No.812748545 >go eat at local pizza place >eat entire large peperoni pizza >still hungry >Too embarassed to order more cause qt cashier will think I'm a f------ fatass >pretend go get a call from friend 6 KB JPG >stage an entire 3 minute conversation >end call asking him if he wants anything from the pizza place >order another pizza to go for "friend" >proceed to devour the pizza in my car >cashier walks up to my car with my backpack >sees i'm halfway done with my “friends" pizza >"you forgot your backpack" >I smile and nod with my mouth full >she f------ giggles and walks away F------ bitch I've never been this embarassed in my life. I can never go back there
: Anonymous 10/27/19(Sun)22:25:39 No.812748545 >go eat at local pizza place >eat entire large peperoni pizza >still hungry >Too embarassed to order more cause qt cashier will think I'm a f------ fatass >pretend go get a call from friend 6 KB JPG >stage an entire 3 minute conversation >end call asking him if he wants anything from the pizza place >order another pizza to go for "friend" >proceed to devour the pizza in my car >cashier walks up to my car with my backpack >sees i'm halfway done with my “friends" pizza >"you forgot your backpack" >I smile and nod with my mouth full >she f------ giggles and walks away F------ bitch I've never been this embarassed in my life. I can never go back there

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon thinks he's special | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:24:41 No.53599618 >be me in highschool >one day the teacher asks the class what album or song he should play >most of the class asked him to play lil pump or BTS or whatever s--- to have the teacher play >teacher picks me and I say Master of Puppets album from Metallica >he plays it and the entire class is saying to pick 73 KB JPG something else >MFW I'm the only one that enjoys rock and metal music of my class >MFW everyone is saying that it's garbage : Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:28:12 No.53599650 >>53599618 (OP) # Yeah you were born in the wrong generation huh? Take your boomer rock and f--- off to the nursing home. >>53599805 #
: Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:24:41 No.53599618 >be me in highschool >one day the teacher asks the class what album or song he should play >most of the class asked him to play lil pump or BTS or whatever s--- to have the teacher play >teacher picks me and I say Master of Puppets album from Metallica >he plays it and the entire class is saying to pick 73 KB JPG something else >MFW I'm the only one that enjoys rock and metal music of my class >MFW everyone is saying that it's garbage : Anonymous 07/27/19(Sat)08:28:12 No.53599650 >>53599618 (OP) # Yeah you were born in the wrong generation huh? Take your boomer rock and f--- off to the nursing home. >>53599805 #

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is sad. I'm sad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/13/17(Thu)23:08:41 No.738807804 >be me >riding my motorcycle >get hit by a car >damn it hurts but I walk it off >the girl that hit me is hammered >call 911 because she has a 60 KB JPG massive gash on her head >she's off to the ambulance >after the crash we get to know each other >she's tall, blonde and cute >we begin to date after 6 months of talking >3 years later >got married and my wife just got pregnant. We have a house on the bottom of a beautiful hill >reminds me of Bliss >kek >1 year later >my 3 month old son is growing so fast. >drive him to the doctor's office for a checkup >turn left >a car heading towards me >l swerve out of the way holding my son >l wake up in a hospital >I had gotten into a motorcycle crash 3 weeks ago >but wasn't In a car? >been in a coma the whole time >l ask what happened to the driver >she died I want my family back.
: Anonymous 07/13/17(Thu)23:08:41 No.738807804 >be me >riding my motorcycle >get hit by a car >damn it hurts but I walk it off >the girl that hit me is hammered >call 911 because she has a 60 KB JPG massive gash on her head >she's off to the ambulance >after the crash we get to know each other >she's tall, blonde and cute >we begin to date after 6 months of talking >3 years later >got married and my wife just got pregnant. We have a house on the bottom of a beautiful hill >reminds me of Bliss >kek >1 year later >my 3 month old son is growing so fast. >drive him to the doctor's office for a checkup >turn left >a car heading towards me >l swerve out of the way holding my son >l wake up in a hospital >I had gotten into a motorcycle crash 3 weeks ago >but wasn't In a car? >been in a coma the whole time >l ask what happened to the driver >she died I want my family back.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon has a fren | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/24/19(Wed)15:59:52 No.805441893 >be me 25 >basicslly no friends irl no one cares for me >parents ignore me because i grew up to become a failure >work as car mechanic 245 KB JPG >been smoking weed for 9 years daily >order my stuff from a guy who ive known from school >he basically has anything Weed, speed, Mdma, even heroin or Crocodile and some s--- > works like this i have 2 letterboxes infront of my house >one for usual mail one for him >he has a key i have one i put money inside text him what i want he takes money and leaves the weed > never disapointed me > decide to end my lofe because its s--- no love no friends no family only weed vidya car repairs and me > text him i want heroin about 1 gram > come home from work next day open "drug letterbox" > find a Blunt and a note Note reads:"Hey anon, come around sometime im always home after 7pm" and an adress in my city written on Friday 7:30 pm >go to adress >ring doorbell >dealer opens door >a burst off weed smell hits me in the face with the force of a thousand raging gods >we go inside >sit on couch >he asks why i want the H >tell him i wanted to od >we sit there for 4 hours tslking and smoking >he tells me i can come around whenever i want >calls me a friend >even gives me discount on weed if i promise him not to order anything else >promise him >mfw someone cared for me >MFW someone called me friend for the first time in years Thanks dealer fren
: Anonymous 07/24/19(Wed)15:59:52 No.805441893 >be me 25 >basicslly no friends irl no one cares for me >parents ignore me because i grew up to become a failure >work as car mechanic 245 KB JPG >been smoking weed for 9 years daily >order my stuff from a guy who ive known from school >he basically has anything Weed, speed, Mdma, even heroin or Crocodile and some s--- > works like this i have 2 letterboxes infront of my house >one for usual mail one for him >he has a key i have one i put money inside text him what i want he takes money and leaves the weed > never disapointed me > decide to end my lofe because its s--- no love no friends no family only weed vidya car repairs and me > text him i want heroin about 1 gram > come home from work next day open "drug letterbox" > find a Blunt and a note Note reads:"Hey anon, come around sometime im always home after 7pm" and an adress in my city written on Friday 7:30 pm >go to adress >ring doorbell >dealer opens door >a burst off weed smell hits me in the face with the force of a thousand raging gods >we go inside >sit on couch >he asks why i want the H >tell him i wanted to od >we sit there for 4 hours tslking and smoking >he tells me i can come around whenever i want >calls me a friend >even gives me discount on weed if i promise him not to order anything else >promise him >mfw someone cared for me >MFW someone called me friend for the first time in years Thanks dealer fren

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font material property

Anon's first post | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/18/21(Thu)21:10:00 No.847744971 >be me >decide to finally make a post on 4chan after years of lurking >nobody responds >keep waiting >keep waiting >keep waiting 70 KB JPG >the only person who responds calls me a f----- >post dies >even in a website full of losers I'm a bigger one then all of them >mfw : Anonymous 02/18/21(Thu)21:10:55 No.847745022 f-----
: Anonymous 02/18/21(Thu)21:10:00 No.847744971 >be me >decide to finally make a post on 4chan after years of lurking >nobody responds >keep waiting >keep waiting >keep waiting 70 KB JPG >the only person who responds calls me a f----- >post dies >even in a website full of losers I'm a bigger one then all of them >mfw : Anonymous 02/18/21(Thu)21:10:55 No.847745022 f-----

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

High Pains Drifter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)21:09:58 No.62753517 >really bad pain in back and chest above heart >think I'm having a heart attack >let out huge fart >it's gone how THE F--- does gas give me 32 KB JPG pain in my upper chest?
: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)21:09:58 No.62753517 >really bad pain in back and chest above heart >think I'm having a heart attack >let out huge fart >it's gone how THE F--- does gas give me 32 KB JPG pain in my upper chest?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext jaw organism mammal font terrestrial plant

Parrots aren’t real | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)13:26:13 No.849599360 31C40665-E7C9-46C3-8EF2-F7CCB1CC1631.jpg 729 KB JPG >Got into an argument today with some jackass >he kept insisting that pareots are real >l told him that parrits are not real and were just made up by Hollywood in order to make pirate movies more interesting >he got really defensive and started making cringe arguments in defense of pairots >punched him in this stupid face and left the Safeway I was shopping in >imagine believing that there's such a thing as a talking bird
: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)13:26:13 No.849599360 31C40665-E7C9-46C3-8EF2-F7CCB1CC1631.jpg 729 KB JPG >Got into an argument today with some jackass >he kept insisting that pareots are real >l told him that parrits are not real and were just made up by Hollywood in order to make pirate movies more interesting >he got really defensive and started making cringe arguments in defense of pairots >punched him in this stupid face and left the Safeway I was shopping in >imagine believing that there's such a thing as a talking bird

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext bird nature organism terrestrial plant plant macaw beak parrot

Anon is Turkish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/18/20(Wed)09:42:48 No.840348913 >be me >one chance at life >turkish 30 KB JPG
: Anonymous 11/18/20(Wed)09:42:48 No.840348913 >be me >one chance at life >turkish 30 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext gesture font rectangle terrestrial plant

Anon plays truth or dare | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)22:27:47 No.849603433 >be me >18 >on a school trip >staying in a hotel for 3 days >play truth or dare with my whole class in a room 8 KB JPG >get drunk >a guy dares me to take my pants off in front of everyone >i do it >we all go to sleep >a qt girl sneaks up to my bed >"wow anon i would have never guessed you have such a big d---" >"hheh t-thank you becky, i guess i do" >"can i maybe see it again?" >"we arent playing truth or dare anymore becky, youre drunk. Go to sleep" >she leaves >wake up sober tommorow and realize what i did >mfw
: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)22:27:47 No.849603433 >be me >18 >on a school trip >staying in a hotel for 3 days >play truth or dare with my whole class in a room 8 KB JPG >get drunk >a guy dares me to take my pants off in front of everyone >i do it >we all go to sleep >a qt girl sneaks up to my bed >"wow anon i would have never guessed you have such a big d---" >"hheh t-thank you becky, i guess i do" >"can i maybe see it again?" >"we arent playing truth or dare anymore becky, youre drunk. Go to sleep" >she leaves >wake up sober tommorow and realize what i did >mfw

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

Anon sleeps | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)22:39:46 No.849604187 >be me >i have to put a different object under my pillow every night or i cant fall asleep >used every single object in my house 61 KB JPG >cant sleep for 3 days >its my birthday >mom buys me a gift >i can sleep now >i love you mom
: Anonymous 03/14/21(Sun)22:39:46 No.849604187 >be me >i have to put a different object under my pillow every night or i cant fall asleep >used every single object in my house 61 KB JPG >cant sleep for 3 days >its my birthday >mom buys me a gift >i can sleep now >i love you mom

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext happy font

Anon talks about growing up russian | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/14/19(Thu)00:52:27 No.51441855 > »51441927 >51441933 File: 1489810847089.jpg (40 KB, 533x600) >>51441489 >Talk about what it was like growing up where you grew up >be kid in russia, late 90s-early 2000s >needles lying all over kindergarden's playground, parents warmed me not to play with them. Other kids liked to step on them and crush them (hope they didn't get f------ aids) >making firearms and weak bombs out of anything we could find >used to fight with homeless people with wooden sticks >smoking in school, sometimes right in front of the teacher just for a joke >pour vodka in pepsi bottles and bring them to school and get wasted >inhaling gas from lighters to get high >stealing s--- from shops with the whole class just for fun >fight with chairs and throw them at each other during a craftsmanship class >in a physical education class steal gym mats and build forts out of them >knock out the gym door of it's hinges and put a mat there >we had history classes in a conference-like room with a long rectangular table in the middle >me and my friends sat at the opposite side from the teacher, watched p--- on our phones and masturbated >masturbate literally in every class man I had a great childhood
Anonymous 03/14/19(Thu)00:52:27 No.51441855 > »51441927 >51441933 File: 1489810847089.jpg (40 KB, 533x600) >>51441489 >Talk about what it was like growing up where you grew up >be kid in russia, late 90s-early 2000s >needles lying all over kindergarden's playground, parents warmed me not to play with them. Other kids liked to step on them and crush them (hope they didn't get f------ aids) >making firearms and weak bombs out of anything we could find >used to fight with homeless people with wooden sticks >smoking in school, sometimes right in front of the teacher just for a joke >pour vodka in pepsi bottles and bring them to school and get wasted >inhaling gas from lighters to get high >stealing s--- from shops with the whole class just for fun >fight with chairs and throw them at each other during a craftsmanship class >in a physical education class steal gym mats and build forts out of them >knock out the gym door of it's hinges and put a mat there >we had history classes in a conference-like room with a long rectangular table in the middle >me and my friends sat at the opposite side from the teacher, watched p--- on our phones and masturbated >masturbate literally in every class man I had a great childhood

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font