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/r9k/ is a place of science | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:02:01 No.62516348 >mom sent me the solution to the c-- conundrum 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:29:12 No.62516586 >uncle proved the Poo Postulate 17 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:31:02 No.62516603 >brother telegraphed me the key to the pee plight 9 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:32:03 No.62516613 >>62516348 (OP) # >cousins brothers wife ( my mom) found the piss closet 233 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:35:16 No.62516640 >aunt solved the c--- conjecture 46 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:35:37 No.62516642 >professor proved the problem of the peepee poopoo paradox 72 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:37:13 No.62516658 >dad denounced the d--- declaration 67 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:40:09 No.62516684 >>62516348 (OP) # >Uncle uncovered undetectable cumtowel technique 165 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:41:05 No.62516697 >father re-awakened the primordial penis prophecy 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:43:43 No.62516714 >parents discovered the blueprints for the quantum testicle entangler 54 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:02:01 No.62516348 >mom sent me the solution to the c-- conundrum 31 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:29:12 No.62516586 >uncle proved the Poo Postulate 17 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:31:02 No.62516603 >brother telegraphed me the key to the pee plight 9 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:32:03 No.62516613 >>62516348 (OP) # >cousins brothers wife ( my mom) found the piss closet 233 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:35:16 No.62516640 >aunt solved the c--- conjecture 46 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:35:37 No.62516642 >professor proved the problem of the peepee poopoo paradox 72 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:37:13 No.62516658 >dad denounced the d--- declaration 67 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:40:09 No.62516684 >>62516348 (OP) # >Uncle uncovered undetectable cumtowel technique 165 KB PNG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:41:05 No.62516697 >father re-awakened the primordial penis prophecy 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:43:43 No.62516714 >parents discovered the blueprints for the quantum testicle entangler 54 KB JPG

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Anon goes to a party | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:20:01 No.62519021 >get told to go to address I've never been to for 21st bday >show up with food from work >tons of ppl there drunk as f---, some I've never seen before some from high school >we all get hammered >drunk white qt from high school with fat thighs plops down next to me on couch 296 KB JPG >couch is leather and extremely plush so we slide closer together >lays on my chest >too drunk to get a boner so I just accept it larping as a chad >she eventually gets up and i can't think about anyone else all night >eventually get home >look her up on Facebook >she's gay as f--- every time bros
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:20:01 No.62519021 >get told to go to address I've never been to for 21st bday >show up with food from work >tons of ppl there drunk as f---, some I've never seen before some from high school >we all get hammered >drunk white qt from high school with fat thighs plops down next to me on couch 296 KB JPG >couch is leather and extremely plush so we slide closer together >lays on my chest >too drunk to get a boner so I just accept it larping as a chad >she eventually gets up and i can't think about anyone else all night >eventually get home >look her up on Facebook >she's gay as f--- every time bros

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Anon respects women | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)09:08:30 No.62519421 Tr I respect women >be me >take vacant seat in class because there's no where else to sit >girl next to me abruptly tells me to leave because "her friend's gonna sit there" >leave because I don't want to be rude >all of her friends laugh at me and mock 7 KB PNG me >turns out no one was going to sit there they just didn't want to sit next to me even though I've never met them before >mfw
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)09:08:30 No.62519421 Tr I respect women >be me >take vacant seat in class because there's no where else to sit >girl next to me abruptly tells me to leave because "her friend's gonna sit there" >leave because I don't want to be rude >all of her friends laugh at me and mock 7 KB PNG me >turns out no one was going to sit there they just didn't want to sit next to me even though I've never met them before >mfw

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Anon is a class act | /r/Greentext

File: 144109619434.jpg (35 KB, 535x577) Anonymous 02/14/17(Tue)18:25:23 No.34876891 [Reply) >>34877236 >get up the courage and ask a girl on a date >she said yes >l suggest pizza hut >she likes the idea because its nostalgic and sounds quirky >never been on a date before >try acting mature even though I am 25 >she starts getting uncomfortable >some how manage to salvage it >we order >pizza comes >i am still trying to impress her >l ask the waitress If i can pay complements to the chef >l thought the chef comes out, but you you have to go into to the kitchen >date doesn't come with me >start complementing the chef by myself on a beautiful pizza well done >get back to the table and she gone >wait for a while >ask for takeout >waitress is laughing >sat for 5min holding back the tears
File: 144109619434.jpg (35 KB, 535x577) Anonymous 02/14/17(Tue)18:25:23 No.34876891 [Reply) >>34877236 >get up the courage and ask a girl on a date >she said yes >l suggest pizza hut >she likes the idea because its nostalgic and sounds quirky >never been on a date before >try acting mature even though I am 25 >she starts getting uncomfortable >some how manage to salvage it >we order >pizza comes >i am still trying to impress her >l ask the waitress If i can pay complements to the chef >l thought the chef comes out, but you you have to go into to the kitchen >date doesn't come with me >start complementing the chef by myself on a beautiful pizza well done >get back to the table and she gone >wait for a while >ask for takeout >waitress is laughing >sat for 5min holding back the tears

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Anon's a hero | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/25/20(Tue)19:44:06 No.821462560 >be me >playing left 4 dead 2 >guy with chinese username joins >get idea >spam free tibet tianamen square 1989 etc. etc. in game chat 49 KB JPG >10 minutes later >guy leaves server >save thousands of lives from the coronavirus by posting pasta in the game chat >guy gets sent to labour camp >mfw
: Anonymous 02/25/20(Tue)19:44:06 No.821462560 >be me >playing left 4 dead 2 >guy with chinese username joins >get idea >spam free tibet tianamen square 1989 etc. etc. in game chat 49 KB JPG >10 minutes later >guy leaves server >save thousands of lives from the coronavirus by posting pasta in the game chat >guy gets sent to labour camp >mfw

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Anon finally figured it out | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:47:08 No.62520146 >6 foot >6 pack >6 figure >666 44 KB JPG CHAD IS THE ANTI-CHRIST 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:48:20 No.62520155 Holy f------ s--- its the final redpill : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:49:57 No.62520175 >You want a girlfriend? Ok, just sell me your soul. 89 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:47:08 No.62520146 >6 foot >6 pack >6 figure >666 44 KB JPG CHAD IS THE ANTI-CHRIST 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:48:20 No.62520155 Holy f------ s--- its the final redpill : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)08:49:57 No.62520175 >You want a girlfriend? Ok, just sell me your soul. 89 KB JPG

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Anon confuses Chad and Tyrone | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)07:46:43 No.848358672 >Be Me >Mommy's 69Olb 30 year old mistake >Wake at up at 2pm and see that I have enough GBP for an extra large tendie feels good man meal. >Waddle downstairs as fast as I can and barge in on Mommy deep throating 565 KB JPG Chad's big white c---. >Start yelling "GIVE ME TENDIES CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK." On repeat while doing the Chicken dance. >Mommy and Tyrone immediately stop what they're doing and start praying "Oh good lord please let the diabetes and high blood pressure take him." >After their prayer I start yelling "TENDIE TUESDAY TENDIE TUESDAY." >Chad rolls his eyes and tells me "Anon it's not Tuesday, it's Friday." >I start yelling "FRY CHAD FRIDAY!" And slap him really hard. >Chad passes out. >l take Chad's body and toss it into the deep fryer. >I then take his wallet and buy so many tendies that Wendy's had to close after I left. >MFW I got more tendies that day than I ever had in my entire life. >Feels good man.
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)07:46:43 No.848358672 >Be Me >Mommy's 69Olb 30 year old mistake >Wake at up at 2pm and see that I have enough GBP for an extra large tendie feels good man meal. >Waddle downstairs as fast as I can and barge in on Mommy deep throating 565 KB JPG Chad's big white c---. >Start yelling "GIVE ME TENDIES CLUCK CLUCK CLUCK." On repeat while doing the Chicken dance. >Mommy and Tyrone immediately stop what they're doing and start praying "Oh good lord please let the diabetes and high blood pressure take him." >After their prayer I start yelling "TENDIE TUESDAY TENDIE TUESDAY." >Chad rolls his eyes and tells me "Anon it's not Tuesday, it's Friday." >I start yelling "FRY CHAD FRIDAY!" And slap him really hard. >Chad passes out. >l take Chad's body and toss it into the deep fryer. >I then take his wallet and buy so many tendies that Wendy's had to close after I left. >MFW I got more tendies that day than I ever had in my entire life. >Feels good man.

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Anon tries tea | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 06/10/19(Mon)23:57:31 No.256056764 >>256056860 >>256056942 >>256056986 >>256057042 >>256057090 >>256057107 >>256057130 >>256057236 File: f85cb694209487e5b1dd553cf(..).png (3.1 MB, 1413x2000) Just tried tea for the first time and I really don't understand why the bongs love it so much. Drinking the broth was fine but when it actually came time to eat the thing I was almost sick. Bongs actually like this? O Anonymous 06/10/19(Mon)23:58:53 No.256056860 ► >>256057003 File: 1559854782662.png (67 KB, 239x410) >>256056764 >when it actually came time to eat the thing I was almost sick. w-what did you eat? >>256056860 The teabag. O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:00:43 No.256057003 >>256057082 >>256057107 >>256057164 >>256057183 >>256057241 >256057245 >>256057249 >>256057278 File: b11dce44af9d071a50f5d1610(...).png (483 KB, 888x1222) >>256056860 The teabag. O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:02:45 No.256057164 File: 69A6E80D-28ED-4145-8E3E-9(..).gif (83 KB, 132x142) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:01 No.256057183 File: laughingshikikan.jpg (48 KB, 680x432) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:51 No.256057241 >>256057003 Are you retarded? >>256057003 >He ate the teabag >>256057003 Did you drink hot water after putting the teabag in your mouth? O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:51 No.256057245 ► >>256057003 dude what O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:04:22 No.256057278 ► File: 1543823942475.jpg (20 KB, 200x200) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:06:44 No.256057465 ► >>256057003 O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:54 No.256057249 ► >>256057003 You're supposed to eat that first >>256057003 Based and tea-pilled O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:08:48 No.256057615 ► File: 12352456436.jpg (32 KB, 454x550) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:06:13 No.256057425 ► File: 73416111_p0.jpg (2.35 MB, 1700x1204) >>256057003 Anon you're supposed to eat the teabag first then drink the water >>256057003 >not only drinking the tea brewed with a teabag, but also eating the teabag itself What the actual f---
O Anonymous 06/10/19(Mon)23:57:31 No.256056764 >>256056860 >>256056942 >>256056986 >>256057042 >>256057090 >>256057107 >>256057130 >>256057236 File: f85cb694209487e5b1dd553cf(..).png (3.1 MB, 1413x2000) Just tried tea for the first time and I really don't understand why the bongs love it so much. Drinking the broth was fine but when it actually came time to eat the thing I was almost sick. Bongs actually like this? O Anonymous 06/10/19(Mon)23:58:53 No.256056860 ► >>256057003 File: 1559854782662.png (67 KB, 239x410) >>256056764 >when it actually came time to eat the thing I was almost sick. w-what did you eat? >>256056860 The teabag. O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:00:43 No.256057003 >>256057082 >>256057107 >>256057164 >>256057183 >>256057241 >256057245 >>256057249 >>256057278 File: b11dce44af9d071a50f5d1610(...).png (483 KB, 888x1222) >>256056860 The teabag. O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:02:45 No.256057164 File: 69A6E80D-28ED-4145-8E3E-9(..).gif (83 KB, 132x142) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:01 No.256057183 File: laughingshikikan.jpg (48 KB, 680x432) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:51 No.256057241 >>256057003 Are you retarded? >>256057003 >He ate the teabag >>256057003 Did you drink hot water after putting the teabag in your mouth? O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:51 No.256057245 ► >>256057003 dude what O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:04:22 No.256057278 ► File: 1543823942475.jpg (20 KB, 200x200) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:06:44 No.256057465 ► >>256057003 O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:03:54 No.256057249 ► >>256057003 You're supposed to eat that first >>256057003 Based and tea-pilled O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:08:48 No.256057615 ► File: 12352456436.jpg (32 KB, 454x550) O Anonymous 06/11/19(Tue)00:06:13 No.256057425 ► File: 73416111_p0.jpg (2.35 MB, 1700x1204) >>256057003 Anon you're supposed to eat the teabag first then drink the water >>256057003 >not only drinking the tea brewed with a teabag, but also eating the teabag itself What the actual f---

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21 (Sat)21:54:49 No.62520213 So angry lads. >Go out to local shop to buy bread >Lady at the cash machine puts her card in, tries to draw out money, gets rejected >She doesn't have the money in 50 KB JPG her bank to withdraw >She turns to me and says how the machine is s--- >So she tries again >And again >Each time looking at me and saying it doesn't have cash in it >7 times shes tried it now >Ask if I could quickly use it to draw out my tenner >She looks at me and asks who the f--- do I think I am >Stand there and think this woman whos half my size is nuts, stand back let her continue >Shes calling me every name under the sun and trying to draw out money still >Get fed up, tell her to let me draw out my money and she can continue >She f------ explodes at me >Staff run over and get aggressive >They know her from outside of work >They stroke her hair whilst she pretends to walk up to me and be "held back" by the staff >She shouts loudly that shes shopping for her kids and I'm stopping her using the machine >More people come over >l tell her I feel sorry for her kids to have a white trash mum like her >Staff turn around to me and tell me to shut my mouth, people from the crowd start telling me l can't talk to her like that >All this time shes alternating from sticking a finger in my face and trying to draw out money >Staff give her money and hugs, she saunters off going down the line telling them what a c--- I am >Flags people down outside the store coming in telling them that I tried to stop her from feeding her kids and what a prick I am >She has a chat with the staff casually about what a prick I am >She walks off shouting she'll see me outside >Go outside >Shes not there I don't even know what to make of it. I've never felt so put down by an entire f------ store including the staff because they know the person. Only one guy came up to me and said "you should report that, out of order that is" who was behind me in the line All I wanted was a couple of cans >>62520315 # >>62520475 # >>62520532 #
: Anonymous 02/27/21 (Sat)21:54:49 No.62520213 So angry lads. >Go out to local shop to buy bread >Lady at the cash machine puts her card in, tries to draw out money, gets rejected >She doesn't have the money in 50 KB JPG her bank to withdraw >She turns to me and says how the machine is s--- >So she tries again >And again >Each time looking at me and saying it doesn't have cash in it >7 times shes tried it now >Ask if I could quickly use it to draw out my tenner >She looks at me and asks who the f--- do I think I am >Stand there and think this woman whos half my size is nuts, stand back let her continue >Shes calling me every name under the sun and trying to draw out money still >Get fed up, tell her to let me draw out my money and she can continue >She f------ explodes at me >Staff run over and get aggressive >They know her from outside of work >They stroke her hair whilst she pretends to walk up to me and be "held back" by the staff >She shouts loudly that shes shopping for her kids and I'm stopping her using the machine >More people come over >l tell her I feel sorry for her kids to have a white trash mum like her >Staff turn around to me and tell me to shut my mouth, people from the crowd start telling me l can't talk to her like that >All this time shes alternating from sticking a finger in my face and trying to draw out money >Staff give her money and hugs, she saunters off going down the line telling them what a c--- I am >Flags people down outside the store coming in telling them that I tried to stop her from feeding her kids and what a prick I am >She has a chat with the staff casually about what a prick I am >She walks off shouting she'll see me outside >Go outside >Shes not there I don't even know what to make of it. I've never felt so put down by an entire f------ store including the staff because they know the person. Only one guy came up to me and said "you should report that, out of order that is" who was behind me in the line All I wanted was a couple of cans >>62520315 # >>62520475 # >>62520532 #

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Anon dies at Pompeii | /r/Greentext

Embracing figures at Pompeii 'could have been gay lovers', after scan reveals they are both men >be me >drinking wine with best bro >served 10 years in army together >saved my life once >named my son after the guy >mountain f------ explodes >find house and hide for shelter >give each other one last bro hug >ash burys us both >1900 years later get found >lol gay bois
Embracing figures at Pompeii 'could have been gay lovers', after scan reveals they are both men >be me >drinking wine with best bro >served 10 years in army together >saved my life once >named my son after the guy >mountain f------ explodes >find house and hide for shelter >give each other one last bro hug >ash burys us both >1900 years later get found >lol gay bois

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new yorkers so phony | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [ Auto] File: bitchass.jpg (231 KB, 1204x856) I Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)10:39:31 >doesn't even skate why are new yorkers such posers prame [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [D Auto]
[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [ Auto] File: bitchass.jpg (231 KB, 1204x856) I Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)10:39:31 >doesn't even skate why are new yorkers such posers prame [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [D Auto]

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Anon became his own grandpa. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.623065567 4 minutes ago >be 23 >marry hot chick cougar who's husband died >rebound sex was cray >she has daughter my age >my single dad thinks my wife's daughter is a fox >wtfdad.jpg >they date for a few months and get married. >my stepdaughter is now my stepmother >my father is my son in law. >w--.exe >have kid with cougar wife >dad has kid with my stepdaughter >my baby became a brother in law to dad >my baby is now my uncle >Jerry springer.PNG >my dad's kid is my sister and my stepdaughters baby thus my grandchild >my wife is my step-mothers mother who is now a grandma to my new half-sibling >l am married to my grandma >l am my own grandpa.
Anonymous No.623065567 4 minutes ago >be 23 >marry hot chick cougar who's husband died >rebound sex was cray >she has daughter my age >my single dad thinks my wife's daughter is a fox >wtfdad.jpg >they date for a few months and get married. >my stepdaughter is now my stepmother >my father is my son in law. >w--.exe >have kid with cougar wife >dad has kid with my stepdaughter >my baby became a brother in law to dad >my baby is now my uncle >Jerry springer.PNG >my dad's kid is my sister and my stepdaughters baby thus my grandchild >my wife is my step-mothers mother who is now a grandma to my new half-sibling >l am married to my grandma >l am my own grandpa.

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Anon likes a horse girl | /r/Greentext

File: itried.jpg (13 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)19:52:27 I f----- up /bros >be 2 weeks ago >crushing on a horse girl >all she loves is horses >jumps horses, dressages with horses >all horse things. >Saw her jumps on social >She always competes >loves winning, loves ribbons >soon ads pop up for me for ribbons >Scrolling ribbons even on p--- sites >Custom ribbons >l order one. Get it embroidered >"#1 Crush. Will you go out with me Tuesday" >Tuesday is my only night off >fastfoodworkerlife.gif > get to school on Friday >It'll give her the weekend to think about it >l spring it on her after lunch >she stops me, starts talking >I don't hear words at first because her eyes are on me >"flattered...but" >Something like that. Expected it. >Accept like a man and go on my way >Hear laughter later >The ribbon is passing around >She told everyone >F------ rekt >I sill watch her jump videos. Ha P* ARLOWEEN HarP* SALOWEEN
File: itried.jpg (13 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)19:52:27 I f----- up /bros >be 2 weeks ago >crushing on a horse girl >all she loves is horses >jumps horses, dressages with horses >all horse things. >Saw her jumps on social >She always competes >loves winning, loves ribbons >soon ads pop up for me for ribbons >Scrolling ribbons even on p--- sites >Custom ribbons >l order one. Get it embroidered >"#1 Crush. Will you go out with me Tuesday" >Tuesday is my only night off >fastfoodworkerlife.gif > get to school on Friday >It'll give her the weekend to think about it >l spring it on her after lunch >she stops me, starts talking >I don't hear words at first because her eyes are on me >"flattered...but" >Something like that. Expected it. >Accept like a man and go on my way >Hear laughter later >The ribbon is passing around >She told everyone >F------ rekt >I sill watch her jump videos. Ha P* ARLOWEEN HarP* SALOWEEN

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Anon is ugly | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)00:55:37 No.62515652 >5000 (five thousand) years of evolution for the modern h--- sapiens >somehow through all these years, the ugly/short/bald genes have not been bred out >5000 years of sexual selection where 17 KB JPG only chads get the girl Is evolution fake? was darwin a f----- hack? or am i unlucky enough to be born in the exact same moment women decided to only choose the top 1% of men? : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)00:57:26 No.62515672 >>62515652 (OP) # Dude are you retarded? For most of the last 5000 years organised religion and governments forced monogamy on commoners. Meaning that every man got a wife, usually by arranged marriage. Even the ugly dudes. Civilization completely wiped out natural and sexual selection.
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)00:55:37 No.62515652 >5000 (five thousand) years of evolution for the modern h--- sapiens >somehow through all these years, the ugly/short/bald genes have not been bred out >5000 years of sexual selection where 17 KB JPG only chads get the girl Is evolution fake? was darwin a f----- hack? or am i unlucky enough to be born in the exact same moment women decided to only choose the top 1% of men? : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)00:57:26 No.62515672 >>62515652 (OP) # Dude are you retarded? For most of the last 5000 years organised religion and governments forced monogamy on commoners. Meaning that every man got a wife, usually by arranged marriage. Even the ugly dudes. Civilization completely wiped out natural and sexual selection.

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Inventive anon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)01:44:43 No.848353057 eeeyy artworks-000483644889-nmmqf2-t500x500.jpg 72 KB JPG >be me in high school >snakes are cool >suicidal >idea.jpeg >save money and get a constrictor snake >try and get it to kill me itself >best way to go 3 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)01:44:43 No.848353057 eeeyy artworks-000483644889-nmmqf2-t500x500.jpg 72 KB JPG >be me in high school >snakes are cool >suicidal >idea.jpeg >save money and get a constrictor snake >try and get it to kill me itself >best way to go 3 Replies View Thread

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Op eats applesauce really early in the morning | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)02:28:17 No.848393993 >be me >eating applesauce at 2:30 in the morning > be you >not eating applesauce at 2:30 in the morning >why live? 3 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)02:29:12 No.848394042 i once put hot sauce on my applesauce
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)02:28:17 No.848393993 >be me >eating applesauce at 2:30 in the morning > be you >not eating applesauce at 2:30 in the morning >why live? 3 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)02:29:12 No.848394042 i once put hot sauce on my applesauce

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Anon lies via greentext | /r/Greentext

>be me >mom make my favorite food for lunch >after studying for my exams I won my first game in Warzone >lift weights and then take a shower to go to my girlfriend's house >she cooks 3 eggs for me, and gave me half a pizza and 2 redbulls 11 KB PNG >cuddle time.jpg >watch Scarface on Netflix >she starts to suck my D >c-- in her mouth as I watch Al Pacino yell "say hello to my little friend" >l gotta say it was a good day
>be me >mom make my favorite food for lunch >after studying for my exams I won my first game in Warzone >lift weights and then take a shower to go to my girlfriend's house >she cooks 3 eggs for me, and gave me half a pizza and 2 redbulls 11 KB PNG >cuddle time.jpg >watch Scarface on Netflix >she starts to suck my D >c-- in her mouth as I watch Al Pacino yell "say hello to my little friend" >l gotta say it was a good day

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not greentext but what the fuck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:23:53 No.848410707 so i ordered this doll online and put a jessie james fleshlight inside it and i've been f------ it for a couple of weeks mom found it help what do i do she's talking on the phone and crying i'm 28 years old BAR been 126 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:26:32 No.848410832 >>848410707 (OP) # W.. w.. why.. did you do that Anon? 29 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:23:53 No.848410707 so i ordered this doll online and put a jessie james fleshlight inside it and i've been f------ it for a couple of weeks mom found it help what do i do she's talking on the phone and crying i'm 28 years old BAR been 126 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/27/21(Sat)15:26:32 No.848410832 >>848410707 (OP) # W.. w.. why.. did you do that Anon? 29 KB JPG

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anon carrys the guild | /r/Greentext

File: girl joins the guild.jpg (92 KB, 715x537) Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:43:48 No.546036070 >>546036354 >>546036528 >girl joins the guild O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:46:04 No.546036298 >>546036589 >>546036 >dates leader >leaves him for another member a month later >guild splits >you, an unrelated party now have to choose a faction in this shitshow >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:46:37 No.546036354 ► >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:48:02 No.546036528 >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:48:44 No.546036589 >>546036298 >Leave the guild >Don't ever join a guild again >Remove all those f------ from your circle there
File: girl joins the guild.jpg (92 KB, 715x537) Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:43:48 No.546036070 >>546036354 >>546036528 >girl joins the guild O Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:46:04 No.546036298 >>546036589 >>546036 >dates leader >leaves him for another member a month later >guild splits >you, an unrelated party now have to choose a faction in this shitshow >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:46:37 No.546036354 ► >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:48:02 No.546036528 >> Anonymous 02/26/21(Fri)22:48:44 No.546036589 >>546036298 >Leave the guild >Don't ever join a guild again >Remove all those f------ from your circle there

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Anon plays God | /r/Greentext

>have pubic lice (crabs) OD >no shampoo works >decide to get some fire ants and place on pubes to fight the crabs >they scrap for a bit >they both have established strongholds on the opposite ends 2 KB JPG of my jungle >to the north lie the wiley crabs of pubendorf >to the south lie the barbaric fire ants of fort scrotum >one morning notice a fire ant on horseback riding towards the crabs stronghold >look closer >its a f------ threaty of alliance F--- f--- their joining sides!!! There is a rumble in my jungle and i dont what to do about it
>have pubic lice (crabs) OD >no shampoo works >decide to get some fire ants and place on pubes to fight the crabs >they scrap for a bit >they both have established strongholds on the opposite ends 2 KB JPG of my jungle >to the north lie the wiley crabs of pubendorf >to the south lie the barbaric fire ants of fort scrotum >one morning notice a fire ant on horseback riding towards the crabs stronghold >look closer >its a f------ threaty of alliance F--- f--- their joining sides!!! There is a rumble in my jungle and i dont what to do about it

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