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Anon plays runescape | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/10/21(Wed)19:17:28 No.62270789 1599948256146.png (17 KB, 172x152) >grinding mining on oldschool runescape >suddenly ask myself what's the whole point of it anyway >remember there's no point to life at all >keep grinding
Anonymous 02/10/21(Wed)19:17:28 No.62270789 1599948256146.png (17 KB, 172x152) >grinding mining on oldschool runescape >suddenly ask myself what's the whole point of it anyway >remember there's no point to life at all >keep grinding

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Anon decides to use 4chan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/17/21(Wed)09:27:34 No.847581444 >decide to use 4chan >go on AN >instantly get morbidly obese and racist 27 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/17/21(Wed)09:27:34 No.847581444 >decide to use 4chan >go on AN >instantly get morbidly obese and racist 27 KB JPG

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At least he admitted to being an asshole | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)08:52:13 No.62328987 Kinda reminds me of when I got outted as a virgin. Guy I went to high school with got hired at my workplace. >typically normie talk occurs about relationships. >everyone is of course chatting it up 437 KB JPG about exes >someone asks if I have any horrible exes and before I could even answer the new guy started shouting how back in school I never had a gf and am a virgin >round of laughter ensued and someone asked if it was true >as to NOT be made into a laughing stock and made a fool of I decided to double down on this and make the new guy look like an ads >"yeah, it's true I'm a virgin. I got molested when I was young and have personal contact issues" >room went dead silent followed by several appollogies for laughing at me. >other coworker straight up calls new guy an ass for making fun of me. Being a manipulative c--- has it's moments
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)08:52:13 No.62328987 Kinda reminds me of when I got outted as a virgin. Guy I went to high school with got hired at my workplace. >typically normie talk occurs about relationships. >everyone is of course chatting it up 437 KB JPG about exes >someone asks if I have any horrible exes and before I could even answer the new guy started shouting how back in school I never had a gf and am a virgin >round of laughter ensued and someone asked if it was true >as to NOT be made into a laughing stock and made a fool of I decided to double down on this and make the new guy look like an ads >"yeah, it's true I'm a virgin. I got molested when I was young and have personal contact issues" >room went dead silent followed by several appollogies for laughing at me. >other coworker straight up calls new guy an ass for making fun of me. Being a manipulative c--- has it's moments

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Anon has a shitty friend | /r/Greentext

File: 79129414.png (111 KB, 294x348) Women reaction to finding out you're a virgin Anonymous 02/14/21(Sun)19:36:30 No.62326339 [Reply] Hey robots (especially older robots), l'd like to hear how some women reacted to finding out you're a virgin. Whether it was positive or negative. >25 and started a job and worked there for 3 months >male co-workers are talking about sex >they ask me when my first time was >tried to lie and said "oh I was like 17 so kinda late" >have friend that works there >he yells out "W-- NO HE DIDN'T HE'S A VIRGIN!" >coworkers all gasp and some laugh >they ask how that's possible because I'm fit and they say they love talking to me >have female coworkers coming up to me throughout the day asking questions >"Are you religious or something?" "How is that possible you're so cute." It's okay anon I don't judge you." "Yeah you have a virgin look to you." >felt like s--- throughout the day and from then on I was known as the virgin I'd say bad experience overall.
File: 79129414.png (111 KB, 294x348) Women reaction to finding out you're a virgin Anonymous 02/14/21(Sun)19:36:30 No.62326339 [Reply] Hey robots (especially older robots), l'd like to hear how some women reacted to finding out you're a virgin. Whether it was positive or negative. >25 and started a job and worked there for 3 months >male co-workers are talking about sex >they ask me when my first time was >tried to lie and said "oh I was like 17 so kinda late" >have friend that works there >he yells out "W-- NO HE DIDN'T HE'S A VIRGIN!" >coworkers all gasp and some laugh >they ask how that's possible because I'm fit and they say they love talking to me >have female coworkers coming up to me throughout the day asking questions >"Are you religious or something?" "How is that possible you're so cute." It's okay anon I don't judge you." "Yeah you have a virgin look to you." >felt like s--- throughout the day and from then on I was known as the virgin I'd say bad experience overall.

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Anon is weak | /r/Greentext

>try doing one push up >fall on my stomach >arms ache >chest suddenly feels tight and squeezing sensation like im having a heart attack i'll stay weak forever 1h (2/16 13:44) · 62355382 1 Reply >>62355278 (OP) Have you tried not being origanoli fat? 1h (2/16 13:51) · 62355447 1 Reply >>62355278 (OP) Start with woman push ups. Instead of your toes, use your knees.
>try doing one push up >fall on my stomach >arms ache >chest suddenly feels tight and squeezing sensation like im having a heart attack i'll stay weak forever 1h (2/16 13:44) · 62355382 1 Reply >>62355278 (OP) Have you tried not being origanoli fat? 1h (2/16 13:51) · 62355447 1 Reply >>62355278 (OP) Start with woman push ups. Instead of your toes, use your knees.

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Anon has a boyfriend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/27/19(Tue)16:20:29 No.13223338 Gave my boyfriend the same perfume my dad uses now every time i smell him i get instantly horny 1.27 MB GIF : Anonymous 08/27/19(Tue)16:23:49 No.13223374 >>13223338 (OP) # 19 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/27/19(Tue)16:20:29 No.13223338 Gave my boyfriend the same perfume my dad uses now every time i smell him i get instantly horny 1.27 MB GIF : Anonymous 08/27/19(Tue)16:23:49 No.13223374 >>13223338 (OP) # 19 KB JPG

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Anon N The Hood | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)16:48:08 No.847531039 I wouldn't call this getting jumped but idk what else to call it >be me >just got out of after school music lesson >it's 5pm in november >very dark outside >not scared because i dont live in 78 KB JPG compton or the bronx >take shortcut through park >no streetlights in the park for some reason >spot a small group of three delinquent tards >don't think much of it because im pretty chill with most of the people like that where i live >walk past them >one says something like anon whats in the suitcase >it was my instrument >tells tard it's my instrument >continue walking >tardgang starts walking behind me >muttering amongst themselves about this f----- that walks in front of them >one says some s--- to his friends like i'll f------ hit him >doubt.png >he runs up behind me and puts me in some gay headlock >christ >he complains to me that my hair is in his face >sorry that you grabbed me from behind and buried your face into my hair retard >did not say this >politely apologises like a f------ bottom dude can i just go home yeah ok anon >speech 100 >i escape the jaws of death tf did he gain from that
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)16:48:08 No.847531039 I wouldn't call this getting jumped but idk what else to call it >be me >just got out of after school music lesson >it's 5pm in november >very dark outside >not scared because i dont live in 78 KB JPG compton or the bronx >take shortcut through park >no streetlights in the park for some reason >spot a small group of three delinquent tards >don't think much of it because im pretty chill with most of the people like that where i live >walk past them >one says something like anon whats in the suitcase >it was my instrument >tells tard it's my instrument >continue walking >tardgang starts walking behind me >muttering amongst themselves about this f----- that walks in front of them >one says some s--- to his friends like i'll f------ hit him >doubt.png >he runs up behind me and puts me in some gay headlock >christ >he complains to me that my hair is in his face >sorry that you grabbed me from behind and buried your face into my hair retard >did not say this >politely apologises like a f------ bottom dude can i just go home yeah ok anon >speech 100 >i escape the jaws of death tf did he gain from that

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Anon isn't very smart | /r/Greentext

most retarded moments thread ? > be me > be 11 > in car with family heading home from county fair 100 KB JPG > dad wants dinner > mom hands me the phone book and tells me to look up the number for the place dad wanted so she could check the wait > for whatever f------ reason I hear "get rid of this" > roll down the window and chunk the phone book as we're going 80 on the interstate
most retarded moments thread ? > be me > be 11 > in car with family heading home from county fair 100 KB JPG > dad wants dinner > mom hands me the phone book and tells me to look up the number for the place dad wanted so she could check the wait > for whatever f------ reason I hear "get rid of this" > roll down the window and chunk the phone book as we're going 80 on the interstate

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What lies in our power to do, lies in our power not to do | /r/Greentext

File: 1610068571082.jpg (33 KB, 657x527) Anonymous 02/10/21(Wed)18:57:26 No.62270508 [Reply] >>62270665 >>62270677 >>62270781 >>62270796 >lesbian strapon p--- >about to nut >realize im alone im my room, behind my computer screen, how pathetic i am >f--- this s--- >close p--- and go take a shower I consider this a win L 2 roplies omitted Click boro to viow
File: 1610068571082.jpg (33 KB, 657x527) Anonymous 02/10/21(Wed)18:57:26 No.62270508 [Reply] >>62270665 >>62270677 >>62270781 >>62270796 >lesbian strapon p--- >about to nut >realize im alone im my room, behind my computer screen, how pathetic i am >f--- this s--- >close p--- and go take a shower I consider this a win L 2 roplies omitted Click boro to viow

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anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

File: apu sing.jpg (30 KB, 810x362) Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)13:04:08 No.59886904 [Reply] ► >>59891650 2700 > walk into gym > THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST > OF YOU
File: apu sing.jpg (30 KB, 810x362) Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)13:04:08 No.59886904 [Reply] ► >>59891650 2700 > walk into gym > THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST THE BEST > OF YOU

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Dad of the year | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)16:06:25 No.62362046 >live with friend and his wife >lockdown hit last March and got bored as he'll being stuck home all the time so I fap a bunch >friends wife walks in on me tuggin not once but three times in a week. 63 KB JPG >suggests a threesome with her and my friend >we all fug. Friend notes how I have high sex drive wouldn't mind loaning me his wife whenever I feel backed up. >once a week turned into 2 or e times and snowballed into daily. >flash foreword to 4 months ago and u was getting it on with her 2 or 3 times as often as my friend. Legit multiple times a day sometimes. >her period runs late >find out she is 5 weeks along >friend is jumping for joy at the thought of becoming a father I'm a horrible person.
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)16:06:25 No.62362046 >live with friend and his wife >lockdown hit last March and got bored as he'll being stuck home all the time so I fap a bunch >friends wife walks in on me tuggin not once but three times in a week. 63 KB JPG >suggests a threesome with her and my friend >we all fug. Friend notes how I have high sex drive wouldn't mind loaning me his wife whenever I feel backed up. >once a week turned into 2 or e times and snowballed into daily. >flash foreword to 4 months ago and u was getting it on with her 2 or 3 times as often as my friend. Legit multiple times a day sometimes. >her period runs late >find out she is 5 weeks along >friend is jumping for joy at the thought of becoming a father I'm a horrible person.

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Anon finds happiness from porn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/09/18(Sun)10:50:38 No.49755013 >tfw I see a d--- in a p--- vid that's smaller than mine Is there a better feel than this? 806 KB PNG View Thread
: Anonymous 12/09/18(Sun)10:50:38 No.49755013 >tfw I see a d--- in a p--- vid that's smaller than mine Is there a better feel than this? 806 KB PNG View Thread

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Full employment act | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)09:16:12 No.62356259 >read provided course math textbook >be hopelessly confused, not even begin to understand >go to 2 hr class, lose track in 5 minutes 267 KB PNG >go home and copy paste homework instructions into youtube >understand how to do it in 5 minutes
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)09:16:12 No.62356259 >read provided course math textbook >be hopelessly confused, not even begin to understand >go to 2 hr class, lose track in 5 minutes 267 KB PNG >go home and copy paste homework instructions into youtube >understand how to do it in 5 minutes

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)12:32:12 No.62359806 >restroom finally empty >walk in stall to take a dump >start power s------- >someone walks in and goes into 1S the stall next to me 43 KB JPG EVERY F------ TIME. WHY
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)12:32:12 No.62359806 >restroom finally empty >walk in stall to take a dump >start power s------- >someone walks in and goes into 1S the stall next to me 43 KB JPG EVERY F------ TIME. WHY

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Anon has a Good Day | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)18:50:41 No.847537835 >be me >wakes up in morning >got to thank god >idk why but today seemed weird >dog wasn't barking >los angeles sky wasn't polluted >mom cooked breakfast without bacon which was a nice change 9 KB JPG >didn't overeat >crush called me >said i'd see her later while i was leaving the house >wondering if i'm going to get shot >get in my convertible >girls love it >stopped at red light >looked around, no one sketchy >s---- chill >kym hit me up saying she's horny >asked the guys where they were playing basketball >i kick ass at basketball >got a trip dub >freaking people out like michael jackson Today was a good day
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)18:50:41 No.847537835 >be me >wakes up in morning >got to thank god >idk why but today seemed weird >dog wasn't barking >los angeles sky wasn't polluted >mom cooked breakfast without bacon which was a nice change 9 KB JPG >didn't overeat >crush called me >said i'd see her later while i was leaving the house >wondering if i'm going to get shot >get in my convertible >girls love it >stopped at red light >looked around, no one sketchy >s---- chill >kym hit me up saying she's horny >asked the guys where they were playing basketball >i kick ass at basketball >got a trip dub >freaking people out like michael jackson Today was a good day

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Anon lives in Texas | /r/Greentext

Техas Customers Tracked: 12,264,998 State Outages: 1,834,260 Last Updated: 2/15/2021, 11:25:31 AM Outage Scale: 0% 10% 30% 60% 100s >be me >be texasfag >be today >power out >fuckfuckfuck.jpg >le idea >put router on server UPS >thiswillholditover.xml >be now >12 hours later >ups is dying, 20 minutes left >fuckfuckfuck(2).jpg
Техas Customers Tracked: 12,264,998 State Outages: 1,834,260 Last Updated: 2/15/2021, 11:25:31 AM Outage Scale: 0% 10% 30% 60% 100s >be me >be texasfag >be today >power out >fuckfuckfuck.jpg >le idea >put router on server UPS >thiswillholditover.xml >be now >12 hours later >ups is dying, 20 minutes left >fuckfuckfuck(2).jpg

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Anon has a cat | /r/Greentext

1h: 45652232·9 Replies · 3 Images JPG 13KB · (255 × 218) 2 Replies good feels thread! I'll start. >have cat >cat wanna be pet >petting makes cat happy >i'm happy thank you cat
1h: 45652232·9 Replies · 3 Images JPG 13KB · (255 × 218) 2 Replies good feels thread! I'll start. >have cat >cat wanna be pet >petting makes cat happy >i'm happy thank you cat

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Anon goes to the cinema | /r/Greentext

File: 1442571422947.jpg (220 KB, 1182x966) Anonymous 03/07/16(Mon)18:05:16 No.672747306 [Reply] ► >>672749164 >be me >going to see the viewing of Zootopia >in the theater here they have an RPX viewing place where you can reserve seats >reserve the entire row, costs me almost $150 >this is the best row, the one right by the stairs >the one that all the moms with their little s---- go to sit at because it's the easiest to get to >sit right in the middle >hot cooked food to the left, drink, popcorn to the right >moms start pouring in with their spawn >trying to sit down >"sorry but all of these seats are reserved" >"for who?" >"for me" >"you can't do thať" >"yes, I can" >almost every single one of them ask to go see a manager, carrying their spawn along with them >manager comes in, I show him the tickets with the seat spot numbers as proof that I reserved the seats >"sorry ma'am, he reserved them, but there are plenty of other seats to sit at" >at this point they don't even care where they sit, they just don't want me to win >they start complaining to the manager about how it's b------- that I get to reserve every seat in the row and how they should change their policy to where each person can only reserve one seat and bla bla bla >manager backs me up though, what a trooper >they accept defeat and take their seats >few moments later, some people come in without kids, and go to sit down in the row I reserved >soccer mom in the row above me tells them in a very bitchy way "you can't sit there, he reserved every single seat in that row just for him. It's b-------" >"no it's fine, you guys can sit here" >this just pisses her off more >she storms out and gets a manager again >hear her yelling at the manager about how he's discriminating against her >she threatens to leave >he kid starts crying >she admits defeat again and sits down >l audibly laugh >"that's it" >she grabs her kid by the arm and leaves >mfw
File: 1442571422947.jpg (220 KB, 1182x966) Anonymous 03/07/16(Mon)18:05:16 No.672747306 [Reply] ► >>672749164 >be me >going to see the viewing of Zootopia >in the theater here they have an RPX viewing place where you can reserve seats >reserve the entire row, costs me almost $150 >this is the best row, the one right by the stairs >the one that all the moms with their little s---- go to sit at because it's the easiest to get to >sit right in the middle >hot cooked food to the left, drink, popcorn to the right >moms start pouring in with their spawn >trying to sit down >"sorry but all of these seats are reserved" >"for who?" >"for me" >"you can't do thať" >"yes, I can" >almost every single one of them ask to go see a manager, carrying their spawn along with them >manager comes in, I show him the tickets with the seat spot numbers as proof that I reserved the seats >"sorry ma'am, he reserved them, but there are plenty of other seats to sit at" >at this point they don't even care where they sit, they just don't want me to win >they start complaining to the manager about how it's b------- that I get to reserve every seat in the row and how they should change their policy to where each person can only reserve one seat and bla bla bla >manager backs me up though, what a trooper >they accept defeat and take their seats >few moments later, some people come in without kids, and go to sit down in the row I reserved >soccer mom in the row above me tells them in a very bitchy way "you can't sit there, he reserved every single seat in that row just for him. It's b-------" >"no it's fine, you guys can sit here" >this just pisses her off more >she storms out and gets a manager again >hear her yelling at the manager about how he's discriminating against her >she threatens to leave >he kid starts crying >she admits defeat again and sits down >l audibly laugh >"that's it" >she grabs her kid by the arm and leaves >mfw

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Anon old classmate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: GiVukYbo) 06/20/14(Fri)10:28:03 No.552114428 [Reply] ► >went to highschool with this guy >dude literally had no neck >had to turn his whole body to look at something. >pivot master >he was kind of a prick too >in gym class one day >go back to locker rooms and s--- >after showering >goes to get his bag with clothes >some filled it full of bottles of head & shoulders >i laughed for goddamn week.
Anonymous (ID: GiVukYbo) 06/20/14(Fri)10:28:03 No.552114428 [Reply] ► >went to highschool with this guy >dude literally had no neck >had to turn his whole body to look at something. >pivot master >he was kind of a prick too >in gym class one day >go back to locker rooms and s--- >after showering >goes to get his bag with clothes >some filled it full of bottles of head & shoulders >i laughed for goddamn week.

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Anon appreciates modern conveniences | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Shitpost 02/16/21(Tue)10:20:32 No.62357986 >be me in 2021 >sit down on toilet >s--- >turn on bidet, ass gets sprayed clean >dry asscrack off with toilet paper >flush >s--- disappears 22 KB JPG Thank you modern conveniences
: Anonymous Shitpost 02/16/21(Tue)10:20:32 No.62357986 >be me in 2021 >sit down on toilet >s--- >turn on bidet, ass gets sprayed clean >dry asscrack off with toilet paper >flush >s--- disappears 22 KB JPG Thank you modern conveniences

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