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Anon has a plague problem | /r/Greentext

Anonymous GIF | 117.45 KB Tuesday 2024-02-06 05:27:07 4 hours ago 37140191 locusts Hey /xros, I have had some issues with locusts lately and thought y'all could help. >see locusts out of the corner of my eye >feel quaking and a loud buzzing sound when I try to sleep >everything in closet is full of holes when I wake up >food I leave out gets eaten >wake up with sores and nips covering my legs >papers, cords, etc knocked off my desk while I'm away >vivid nightmares Does anyone have any solutions? I've tried mosquito nets while I sleep and they don't work, always get new sores in the morning. Applying essential oils worked at first, but they only grew in numbers after. Any help would be appreciated. Are there maybe any encantations or rituals that could help? Again, any help or info is appreciated.
Anonymous GIF | 117.45 KB Tuesday 2024-02-06 05:27:07 4 hours ago 37140191 locusts Hey /xros, I have had some issues with locusts lately and thought y'all could help. >see locusts out of the corner of my eye >feel quaking and a loud buzzing sound when I try to sleep >everything in closet is full of holes when I wake up >food I leave out gets eaten >wake up with sores and nips covering my legs >papers, cords, etc knocked off my desk while I'm away >vivid nightmares Does anyone have any solutions? I've tried mosquito nets while I sleep and they don't work, always get new sores in the morning. Applying essential oils worked at first, but they only grew in numbers after. Any help would be appreciated. Are there maybe any encantations or rituals that could help? Again, any help or info is appreciated.

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anon need to work out | /r/Greentext

ID: 65c1728dd2c65 no f------ way you're not gonna believe this, robots >be me >straight, m, 23, 5'6 >work for ubereats on the weekends, just some extra cash >delivering to some rando's apartment >the dude ordered 2 big macs combos >assume it's for him and someone else >ring doorbell on apartment (don't knock cause it's 6am and people might still be sleeping on a saturday), had to climb stairs to get there, hip hurts like a bitch now (gotta work out more probably) >guy says "be right there" through the s----- doorbell speaker >wait a few seconds >he opens the door guess that food wasn't for two people o.o >bro is built as f--- >like 6'3 at least >wearing gym shorts and a tank top, i can see a basic bench with some weights set up in the apartment behind him >smiles as he takes the food from me, looks into my eyes and says "thanks!" >i mutter "no problem" and watch as he closes the door >get back down to my car and realize my heart is going a little faster than usual >look in the mirror and i can see red fading from my cheeks anons... time for the question: am i gay? eff09dd6e5f3e7039a3e3e06133e6bdd
ID: 65c1728dd2c65 no f------ way you're not gonna believe this, robots >be me >straight, m, 23, 5'6 >work for ubereats on the weekends, just some extra cash >delivering to some rando's apartment >the dude ordered 2 big macs combos >assume it's for him and someone else >ring doorbell on apartment (don't knock cause it's 6am and people might still be sleeping on a saturday), had to climb stairs to get there, hip hurts like a bitch now (gotta work out more probably) >guy says "be right there" through the s----- doorbell speaker >wait a few seconds >he opens the door guess that food wasn't for two people o.o >bro is built as f--- >like 6'3 at least >wearing gym shorts and a tank top, i can see a basic bench with some weights set up in the apartment behind him >smiles as he takes the food from me, looks into my eyes and says "thanks!" >i mutter "no problem" and watch as he closes the door >get back down to my car and realize my heart is going a little faster than usual >look in the mirror and i can see red fading from my cheeks anons... time for the question: am i gay? eff09dd6e5f3e7039a3e3e06133e6bdd

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anon, what the fuck? | /r/Greentext

72,000 CALORIES A DAY DIET Bottleall OLIVE OIL 159 KB JPG 10/18/22(Tue)16:21:36 No.68682981 For the past 3-4 days I've been drinking three 2 litre tins of olive oil a day and each tin is 24,000 calories. It was going ok apart from some minor bathroom problems but now i'm suddenly feeling super sluggish, getting headaches and feeling somewhat unwell now. Should I try and push forward with my bulkmaxxxing or give up? Anonymous 10/18/22(Tue)16:22:23 No.68682991 I'm looking for genuine opinions, especially if you have any medical knowledge because I was feeling good at the start of this and now I feel like absolute s--- for some reason. >>68683000 # >>68683016 # : Anonymous >>68682991 # >for some reason 10/18/22(Tue)16:23:37 No.68683000
72,000 CALORIES A DAY DIET Bottleall OLIVE OIL 159 KB JPG 10/18/22(Tue)16:21:36 No.68682981 For the past 3-4 days I've been drinking three 2 litre tins of olive oil a day and each tin is 24,000 calories. It was going ok apart from some minor bathroom problems but now i'm suddenly feeling super sluggish, getting headaches and feeling somewhat unwell now. Should I try and push forward with my bulkmaxxxing or give up? Anonymous 10/18/22(Tue)16:22:23 No.68682991 I'm looking for genuine opinions, especially if you have any medical knowledge because I was feeling good at the start of this and now I feel like absolute s--- for some reason. >>68683000 # >>68683016 # : Anonymous >>68682991 # >for some reason 10/18/22(Tue)16:23:37 No.68683000

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This is why Anon will be lonely forever | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous My ideal girlfriend 245 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)22:10:51 No.76361525 >social anxiety >Executive dysfunction/ADHD/"lazy"/lethargic but wants to find ways to fix this >Spends most of her time indoors >1 or no friends >No male friends > east European or east Asian >ass not flat >Brown or black hair >has some quality or hidden talent like drawing or affinity for a stem subject >Shorter than me >Soft female voice >Can't hold down a conversation, often gets anxious in live text chat >scared to VC but wants to do it one day >Low self esteem, probably hates herself >Was bullied in school >Not a moralfag >Not very skinny or very fat >Wants to spend all her time with one person Things we would do together: -talk on voice -play video games -she would tell me she loves me -sleep on call -meet irl some day and be happy ever after 10 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous My ideal girlfriend 245 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)22:10:51 No.76361525 >social anxiety >Executive dysfunction/ADHD/"lazy"/lethargic but wants to find ways to fix this >Spends most of her time indoors >1 or no friends >No male friends > east European or east Asian >ass not flat >Brown or black hair >has some quality or hidden talent like drawing or affinity for a stem subject >Shorter than me >Soft female voice >Can't hold down a conversation, often gets anxious in live text chat >scared to VC but wants to do it one day >Low self esteem, probably hates herself >Was bullied in school >Not a moralfag >Not very skinny or very fat >Wants to spend all her time with one person Things we would do together: -talk on voice -play video games -she would tell me she loves me -sleep on call -meet irl some day and be happy ever after 10 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Left behind | /r/Greentext

39m (2/6 1:04) · 76365642 - 2 Re - 0 Img JPG 120KB (1333 × 1333) · IMG_8150.jpg >be me >lonely as f--- >just went through a horrible breakup >desperately try to talk to women >fail continuously >give up and start paying onlyfans girls for custom content >get addicted to talking to them >eventually ask one to send me Snapchat photos of her saying she misses me and cant wait to come home from work >Ask her to do it clothed for the immersion >stops feeling the same >Pay $1000 for a girl to send me a voicemail of her saying she misses me and loves me >furiously masturbate to those >needmore.jpg >ask again and offer $1500 this time >she tells me to get a therapist and denies my request So is this rock bottom or should I be happy I havent sank further and done crack or something?
39m (2/6 1:04) · 76365642 - 2 Re - 0 Img JPG 120KB (1333 × 1333) · IMG_8150.jpg >be me >lonely as f--- >just went through a horrible breakup >desperately try to talk to women >fail continuously >give up and start paying onlyfans girls for custom content >get addicted to talking to them >eventually ask one to send me Snapchat photos of her saying she misses me and cant wait to come home from work >Ask her to do it clothed for the immersion >stops feeling the same >Pay $1000 for a girl to send me a voicemail of her saying she misses me and loves me >furiously masturbate to those >needmore.jpg >ask again and offer $1500 this time >she tells me to get a therapist and denies my request So is this rock bottom or should I be happy I havent sank further and done crack or something?

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Give Me Novacaine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/05/24 (Mon)16:20:13 No.76365149 2.62 MB PNG >be me >swimming at local pool >try and pull myself out of the pool >lose grip and smash my nuts between the pool and my pelvis >feel nothing for like a split second >pain slowly starts to hit >doggy paddle to the pool ladder and try to rest in the hot tub >pain doesn't stop after +30 minutes >force myself out of the hot tub and to the car because I had work in >pain really starts hitting on the drive to work >in complete agony my whole shift >pain didn't subside for three days
Anonymous 02/05/24 (Mon)16:20:13 No.76365149 2.62 MB PNG >be me >swimming at local pool >try and pull myself out of the pool >lose grip and smash my nuts between the pool and my pelvis >feel nothing for like a split second >pain slowly starts to hit >doggy paddle to the pool ladder and try to rest in the hot tub >pain doesn't stop after +30 minutes >force myself out of the hot tub and to the car because I had work in >pain really starts hitting on the drive to work >in complete agony my whole shift >pain didn't subside for three days

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Yukon suck on dees nuts | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 99 KB JPG 03/06/22 (Sun)06:38:56 No.873898797 >be Canadian, live in Yukon >wolves are an occasional worry, but usually avoid people >some are brave enough to get close to us, but there's never any contact >be 13 >sitting on school steps one day >just after school, enjoying a poptart >big white dog comes up to me >without even thinking, I give the dog some pats on the back >look up, it's not a dog >this wolf is looking at me with the most offended look I've seen on a canine >take my hand back >he looks at me for a few seconds like he's about to call HR for inappropriate touching >teacher comes out and starts screaming bloody murder to get away from it >throw poptart as distraction and retreat >wolf casually takes poptart and leaves >mfw I realize I've just recreated how dogs were first domesticated
: Anonymous 99 KB JPG 03/06/22 (Sun)06:38:56 No.873898797 >be Canadian, live in Yukon >wolves are an occasional worry, but usually avoid people >some are brave enough to get close to us, but there's never any contact >be 13 >sitting on school steps one day >just after school, enjoying a poptart >big white dog comes up to me >without even thinking, I give the dog some pats on the back >look up, it's not a dog >this wolf is looking at me with the most offended look I've seen on a canine >take my hand back >he looks at me for a few seconds like he's about to call HR for inappropriate touching >teacher comes out and starts screaming bloody murder to get away from it >throw poptart as distraction and retreat >wolf casually takes poptart and leaves >mfw I realize I've just recreated how dogs were first domesticated

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Guns? Knives | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 457 KB PNG >McMansions? Newbuilds >SUV's? Crossovers >Walmart? ASDA >Hurricane? Weather >Stroads? Dual Carriageways >McDonalds? Wimpey's >College? Sixth form >Welfare? Benefits >Morbidly Obese? Overweight >Chips? Crisps >Drama? Documentary UK is just a mini, less exaggerated USA. >Democrats? Labour >Republicans? Tory >Hotel? Motel >Borderline Slavery? Work 02/05/24(Mon)16:09:56 No.193420766
Anonymous 457 KB PNG >McMansions? Newbuilds >SUV's? Crossovers >Walmart? ASDA >Hurricane? Weather >Stroads? Dual Carriageways >McDonalds? Wimpey's >College? Sixth form >Welfare? Benefits >Morbidly Obese? Overweight >Chips? Crisps >Drama? Documentary UK is just a mini, less exaggerated USA. >Democrats? Labour >Republicans? Tory >Hotel? Motel >Borderline Slavery? Work 02/05/24(Mon)16:09:56 No.193420766

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Anon is a lazy cunt | /r/Greentext

Anonymous JPG | 1.22 MB Tuesday 2024-02-06 07:48:15 about an hour ago 457702338 id: sh5KyQKI... >wake up at 6:00 >stress about job until 8:00 >start job at 8:00 and work until 3:00 >get home, undress, showered by 4:00 >entire body aches until 10:00 >go to sleep and wake up at 6:00 When did you realize the anti-work people were right? 43 Replies 10 Images 33 Poster 194 REPLY
Anonymous JPG | 1.22 MB Tuesday 2024-02-06 07:48:15 about an hour ago 457702338 id: sh5KyQKI... >wake up at 6:00 >stress about job until 8:00 >start job at 8:00 and work until 3:00 >get home, undress, showered by 4:00 >entire body aches until 10:00 >go to sleep and wake up at 6:00 When did you realize the anti-work people were right? 43 Replies 10 Images 33 Poster 194 REPLY

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Small town, big hell | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 34 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)19:13:16 No.913495910 >live in small town >only so many jobs >quit like 10 jobs >everybody knows me and won't hire me now >not even wal-mart will hire me What the f--- do I do bros?
Anonymous 34 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)19:13:16 No.913495910 >live in small town >only so many jobs >quit like 10 jobs >everybody knows me and won't hire me now >not even wal-mart will hire me What the f--- do I do bros?

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Holy based | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 78 KB JPG "based" 02/06/24(Tue)06:34:32 No.195992305 >watching a movie with the folks >accidentally say "based" during one scene >parents hear and ask me what it means >panic slightly and say it's just a way of saying something is cool >parents now regularly refer to things as
: Anonymous 78 KB JPG "based" 02/06/24(Tue)06:34:32 No.195992305 >watching a movie with the folks >accidentally say "based" during one scene >parents hear and ask me what it means >panic slightly and say it's just a way of saying something is cool >parents now regularly refer to things as

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We should have gate keeped harder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/01/24 (Mon)05:57:48 No.662375645 loyl.jpg 55 KB JPG What was the turning point where devs went from: >"Hey dude, check out this sick game" to >"Listen, we have a message to share, we're going to educate you, this is what you're supposed to like"
: Anonymous 01/01/24 (Mon)05:57:48 No.662375645 loyl.jpg 55 KB JPG What was the turning point where devs went from: >"Hey dude, check out this sick game" to >"Listen, we have a message to share, we're going to educate you, this is what you're supposed to like"

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Anon is starved of love | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 24 minutes ago 76365642 >be me >lonely as f--- >just went through a horrible breakup >desperately try to talk to women >fail continuously >give up and start paying onlyfans girls for custom content >get addicted to talking to them >eventually ask one to send me Snapchat photos of her saying she misses me and cant wait to come home from work >Ask her to do it clothed for the immersion >stops feeling the same >Pay $1000 for a girl to send me a voicemail of her saying she misses me and loves me >furiously masturbate to those >needmore.jpg >ask again and offer $1500 this time >she tells me to get a therapist and denies my request So is this rock bottom or should I be happy I havent sank further and done crack or something?
Anonymous 24 minutes ago 76365642 >be me >lonely as f--- >just went through a horrible breakup >desperately try to talk to women >fail continuously >give up and start paying onlyfans girls for custom content >get addicted to talking to them >eventually ask one to send me Snapchat photos of her saying she misses me and cant wait to come home from work >Ask her to do it clothed for the immersion >stops feeling the same >Pay $1000 for a girl to send me a voicemail of her saying she misses me and loves me >furiously masturbate to those >needmore.jpg >ask again and offer $1500 this time >she tells me to get a therapist and denies my request So is this rock bottom or should I be happy I havent sank further and done crack or something?

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Time of need | /r/Greentext

5m (2/6 1:34) · 76365994 - 1 Re - 0 Img JPG 107KB (748 × 1080) · 1706482946123268.jpg 1 Reply >turn 18 >mom is an off and on drug addict >she's in the middle of one of the times where she's using daily >she kicks me out because "I'm too expensive" >call my brother who cut us off in desperation >he seems legitimately excited to hear from me >says he'll pick me up >unironically flies in with a ticket for me to fly home with him >surprises me with his boyfriend when we get there >turns out he was excommunicated because our mom hates gays >he didn't know my phone number and had no idea that I had his >weird for me because anti-gay upbringing but I can deal with it >except I noticed immediately that his boyfriend is like 6'5 and my brother is shorter than me, and I'm only 5'7 >have to hear him getting piped every night
5m (2/6 1:34) · 76365994 - 1 Re - 0 Img JPG 107KB (748 × 1080) · 1706482946123268.jpg 1 Reply >turn 18 >mom is an off and on drug addict >she's in the middle of one of the times where she's using daily >she kicks me out because "I'm too expensive" >call my brother who cut us off in desperation >he seems legitimately excited to hear from me >says he'll pick me up >unironically flies in with a ticket for me to fly home with him >surprises me with his boyfriend when we get there >turns out he was excommunicated because our mom hates gays >he didn't know my phone number and had no idea that I had his >weird for me because anti-gay upbringing but I can deal with it >except I noticed immediately that his boyfriend is like 6'5 and my brother is shorter than me, and I'm only 5'7 >have to hear him getting piped every night

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Anon includes a shocking turn of events in his story | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Penis Th 7 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)23:41:51 No.913491581 be me, 22 y/o nursing student > straight, have f----- 2 girls in college and loved it > only watch straight p--- > 3 weeks ago > doing my clinical practice in the ER > new patient, 20 y/o male with priapism > go see him > first time in my life seeing an erect c--- other than mine > it was about 18-20 cm long, good girth, uncut > suddenly start picturing myself sucking that c--- > get horny for the rest of the day, can't take that picture out of my mind > first thing I do when I get home is watch gay p--- and masturbate > ff to now, still can't get the picture of me sucking c--- out of my mind > thinking about making a grindr profile and sucking the first c--- that I match with What do you think/b? Why do I suddenly want to suck d--- after a lifetime of being straight?
Anonymous Penis Th 7 KB JPG 02/05/24(Mon)23:41:51 No.913491581 be me, 22 y/o nursing student > straight, have f----- 2 girls in college and loved it > only watch straight p--- > 3 weeks ago > doing my clinical practice in the ER > new patient, 20 y/o male with priapism > go see him > first time in my life seeing an erect c--- other than mine > it was about 18-20 cm long, good girth, uncut > suddenly start picturing myself sucking that c--- > get horny for the rest of the day, can't take that picture out of my mind > first thing I do when I get home is watch gay p--- and masturbate > ff to now, still can't get the picture of me sucking c--- out of my mind > thinking about making a grindr profile and sucking the first c--- that I match with What do you think/b? Why do I suddenly want to suck d--- after a lifetime of being straight?

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Fall Right In | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why does this keep happening 1.86 MB GIF >be me >wake up early today >kek 02/05/24 (Mon)14:18:25 No.76364121 >let's seize the day! I have so much time, I can accomplish so many goals today! Let's take a walk, read a book, start working on that presentation I have to do >take break >I wonder what the f------ at 4chan are up to >end up spending entire day arguing with random chuds on /pol/ Why does this site keep sucking me in?
Anonymous Why does this keep happening 1.86 MB GIF >be me >wake up early today >kek 02/05/24 (Mon)14:18:25 No.76364121 >let's seize the day! I have so much time, I can accomplish so many goals today! Let's take a walk, read a book, start working on that presentation I have to do >take break >I wonder what the f------ at 4chan are up to >end up spending entire day arguing with random chuds on /pol/ Why does this site keep sucking me in?

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