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Anon loses the ability to pair bond | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 276 KB JPG 03/01/23(Wed)22:21:08 No.895214169 I am a disgusting man w---- >break up with gf two years ago >sad for a full year then slowly cope >mass media and social media always cracking jokes about guys who don't get laid often are losers >general "body count" seems to be in 20s or 30s >movies show that cool guys sleep around >the influence gets to me >want to "live a fun party life", "let loose", "live my youth" Huge mistake >slept with 13 different women in the last 8 months >can't feel any emotions for any woman anymore >they're just walking vagina kiosks >same flirty jokes and topics on repeat, just new faces >I miss the nervous feeling in my stomach before a date >I miss feeling like I have a crush on someone >I want a woman I love play woth my hair, not a nameless tinder chick >feel depressed and empty >also feel like a dirty w---- >also feel disgusting just moving from vagina to vagina, never having a human connection Hookups have ruined me emotionally

Anonymous 276 KB JPG 03/01/23(Wed)22:21:08 No.895214169 I am a disgusting man w---- >break up with gf two years ago >sad for a full year then slowly cope >mass media and social media always cracking jokes about guys who don't get laid often are losers >general "body count" seems to be in 20s or 30s >movies show that cool guys sleep around >the influence gets to me >want to "live a fun party life", "let loose", "live my youth" Huge mistake >slept with 13 different women in the last 8 months >can't feel any emotions for any woman anymore >they're just walking vagina kiosks >same flirty jokes and topics on repeat, just new faces >I miss the nervous feeling in my stomach before a date >I miss feeling like I have a crush on someone >I want a woman I love play woth my hair, not a nameless tinder chick >feel depressed and empty >also feel like a dirty w---- >also feel disgusting just moving from vagina to vagina, never having a human connection Hookups have ruined me emotionally

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Brotherly bond | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: zq1yzoyj) 11/07/20(Sat)09:43:45 No.11606892 ARE YA WINNING, SON? 3522582.2550000157_image.png 100 KB PNG One of the best things happened today >brother plays CS, very good at it >he's in a game with his friends as I'm writing this >decide to send him image >pic related >hear loud laughter from the other room >smile 6 Replies 3 Images View Thread

Anonymous (ID: zq1yzoyj) 11/07/20(Sat)09:43:45 No.11606892 ARE YA WINNING, SON? 3522582.2550000157_image.png 100 KB PNG One of the best things happened today >brother plays CS, very good at it >he's in a game with his friends as I'm writing this >decide to send him image >pic related >hear loud laughter from the other room >smile 6 Replies 3 Images View Thread

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Real men use a VGA cable | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/07/24(Sun)00:58:13 No.201006607 Guy who likes you but you're not quite attracted to him starterpack "Oh I never had time to < 6ft date in college, just looking to put my best foot forward" AT&T LTE 7:46 PM 100% - <Back 341-555-1092 They 1942 Hey! I had a great time, hope you did too. It was so fun getting to know you Contact I did) thanks for dropping me Somewhat cute, non-threatening appearance Hinge No problem, and I'd love to see you again soon :) Today 1:42 Hey, how's your day going? Are you free this Saturday? I might get tickets to that show we talked about Tay If you're interested, if not totally cool, just wanted to ask Introduced himself with a corny pickup line iMessage Send "I don't know, what are your thoughts about me?" Makes just under 6 figures Let him pay for the dates and he is always happy to. MARVEL STUDIOS 1706491035267318.png 694 KB PNG >when he connects the laptop to the tv with an HDMI cable

Anonymous 07/07/24(Sun)00:58:13 No.201006607 Guy who likes you but you're not quite attracted to him starterpack "Oh I never had time to < 6ft date in college, just looking to put my best foot forward" AT&T LTE 7:46 PM 100% - <Back 341-555-1092 They 1942 Hey! I had a great time, hope you did too. It was so fun getting to know you Contact I did) thanks for dropping me Somewhat cute, non-threatening appearance Hinge No problem, and I'd love to see you again soon :) Today 1:42 Hey, how's your day going? Are you free this Saturday? I might get tickets to that show we talked about Tay If you're interested, if not totally cool, just wanted to ask Introduced himself with a corny pickup line iMessage Send "I don't know, what are your thoughts about me?" Makes just under 6 figures Let him pay for the dates and he is always happy to. MARVEL STUDIOS 1706491035267318.png 694 KB PNG >when he connects the laptop to the tv with an HDMI cable

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I am anon, this is my own greentext. I need some asprin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous MIGRAINE 81 KB JPG house once. 07/07/24(Sun)01:19:25 No.78073903 >be me 3 years old, f------ monkey child >climb on table, chandelier, all sorts of things. >fell and hit my head, broke arm off table once >be me 6 years old >was on the other side of the railing on my balcony in my >fell, not sure if I hit my head though. Still hurt >be me in playhouse 7 year old, being an idiot. >fall and hit head >be me 11 years old > jump over my twin sister full force into a wall >stiches on forehead >be me 16 Fall out of tree, break arm, doctor said I suffered a blow to the head and they gave me a cognitive test >I passed it >they still recommend me to go to another doctor >be me 19 today when after looking at my brain doctors say I've had multiple untreated concussions in the past >picrel tfw You can only imagine what this has done to me as a person irl Anonymous >>78073903 (OP) # 07/07/24(Sun)01:33:06 No.78073985 Sorry when I was 16 the fall from the tree knocked me out, forgot to add that

: Anonymous MIGRAINE 81 KB JPG house once. 07/07/24(Sun)01:19:25 No.78073903 >be me 3 years old, f------ monkey child >climb on table, chandelier, all sorts of things. >fell and hit my head, broke arm off table once >be me 6 years old >was on the other side of the railing on my balcony in my >fell, not sure if I hit my head though. Still hurt >be me in playhouse 7 year old, being an idiot. >fall and hit head >be me 11 years old > jump over my twin sister full force into a wall >stiches on forehead >be me 16 Fall out of tree, break arm, doctor said I suffered a blow to the head and they gave me a cognitive test >I passed it >they still recommend me to go to another doctor >be me 19 today when after looking at my brain doctors say I've had multiple untreated concussions in the past >picrel tfw You can only imagine what this has done to me as a person irl Anonymous >>78073903 (OP) # 07/07/24(Sun)01:33:06 No.78073985 Sorry when I was 16 the fall from the tree knocked me out, forgot to add that

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Anons fucks around and finds out | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1 hour ago >be me >8 years old 813862559 >want to know what happens to poop if you don't flush it down the toilet >s--- in mcdonalds happy meal toy >leave it on the shelf in my closet >few months later >forgot all about the toy >woken up at 2 am by a loud ass bang followed by the WORST smell of s--- possible >parents are also woken up and are panicking >911 is called >police arrive and explosion is traced back to closet >closet is opened >s--- everywhere >suddenly remember the mcdonalds toy >turns out the mcdonalds toy container was air tight, and kept all the gas in from decomposition until the thing reached critical pressure and exploded >entire second floor now smells like s--- >mfw

Anonymous 1 hour ago >be me >8 years old 813862559 >want to know what happens to poop if you don't flush it down the toilet >s--- in mcdonalds happy meal toy >leave it on the shelf in my closet >few months later >forgot all about the toy >woken up at 2 am by a loud ass bang followed by the WORST smell of s--- possible >parents are also woken up and are panicking >911 is called >police arrive and explosion is traced back to closet >closet is opened >s--- everywhere >suddenly remember the mcdonalds toy >turns out the mcdonalds toy container was air tight, and kept all the gas in from decomposition until the thing reached critical pressure and exploded >entire second floor now smells like s--- >mfw

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Serious ass whooping time | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/07/24(Sun)14:17:28 No.201014652 3.jpg 50 KB JPG >MC is heavily beaten, almost dead >he gets up for the last attack >the main theme starts playing

: Anonymous 07/07/24(Sun)14:17:28 No.201014652 3.jpg 50 KB JPG >MC is heavily beaten, almost dead >he gets up for the last attack >the main theme starts playing

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Level 0 programmer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous THE 21 YEAR OLD SELF TAUGHT COOMITTER AAAAAAAAAA I'm coooommittiing commits readme formatting changes 30 times per hour GitHub git commit-m "readme updates" 103 KB JPG 07/07/24(Sun)08:54:18 No.78074462 > be me > computer science student > people talk about high level and low level programmers > So I think it's like a game! The higher the level a programmer is, the better they are > I start to hear more of: > Businesses demand more low level programmers > w-- > "I'm going to start this intro course by giving you the highest possible level of overview" > huh? > This low level threat is the worst thing we've faced in a good while. > WHAT > Turns out that I'm retarded, it's not like a game > High level programmers are the type of programmer who still has the training wheels on and have no idea what memory allocation means, they only interact with abstractions > Low level programmers are the supersweaty nerds who can code assembly, modify their own kernel, and manually allocate memory and all kinds of wizard s---, no abstraction Do I just drop off at this point?

Anonymous THE 21 YEAR OLD SELF TAUGHT COOMITTER AAAAAAAAAA I'm coooommittiing commits readme formatting changes 30 times per hour GitHub git commit-m "readme updates" 103 KB JPG 07/07/24(Sun)08:54:18 No.78074462 > be me > computer science student > people talk about high level and low level programmers > So I think it's like a game! The higher the level a programmer is, the better they are > I start to hear more of: > Businesses demand more low level programmers > w-- > "I'm going to start this intro course by giving you the highest possible level of overview" > huh? > This low level threat is the worst thing we've faced in a good while. > WHAT > Turns out that I'm retarded, it's not like a game > High level programmers are the type of programmer who still has the training wheels on and have no idea what memory allocation means, they only interact with abstractions > Low level programmers are the supersweaty nerds who can code assembly, modify their own kernel, and manually allocate memory and all kinds of wizard s---, no abstraction Do I just drop off at this point?

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Anon subverts the psyop | /r/Greentext

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HSKTKTR | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Rate my routine 03/21/24(Thu)12:43:03 No.73870352 Monday: Head Tuesday: Shoulders Wednesday: Knees 47 KB JPG Thursday: Toes Friday: Knees Saturday: Toes Sunday: Rest

Anonymous Rate my routine 03/21/24(Thu)12:43:03 No.73870352 Monday: Head Tuesday: Shoulders Wednesday: Knees 47 KB JPG Thursday: Toes Friday: Knees Saturday: Toes Sunday: Rest

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They be so desperate lol | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)21:34:16 No.20033811 tv.jpg 1.02 MB JPG >Hey virgin. Your parents have paid me to f--- you. How would /tv/ react to this situation?

: Anonymous 06/21/24(Fri)21:34:16 No.20033811 tv.jpg 1.02 MB JPG >Hey virgin. Your parents have paid me to f--- you. How would /tv/ react to this situation?

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An absolute classic | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: VpsQfP9F 4 KB JPG 06/20/19(Thu)07:16:45 No.21688053C >date is going well >politics gets brought up >don't want to scare her >spout the most normie, bluepilled, centrist opinions I can think of >nothing even remotely close to right of center >"Oh god, you're not an alt-righter, are you?"

Anonymous (ID: VpsQfP9F 4 KB JPG 06/20/19(Thu)07:16:45 No.21688053C >date is going well >politics gets brought up >don't want to scare her >spout the most normie, bluepilled, centrist opinions I can think of >nothing even remotely close to right of center >"Oh god, you're not an alt-righter, are you?"

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happens everytime | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/24/24(Mon)17:09:09 No.200430922 IMG_9717.jpg 115 KB JPG >buys a $5 pizza >chef fancies it up >charge $299.99 for the meal never turned off my tv so fast

Anonymous 06/24/24(Mon)17:09:09 No.200430922 IMG_9717.jpg 115 KB JPG >buys a $5 pizza >chef fancies it up >charge $299.99 for the meal never turned off my tv so fast

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Anon has a workout routine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Rate my routine 03/21/24(Thu)12:43:03 No.73870352 Monday: Head Tuesday: Shoulders Wednesday: Knees 47 KB JPG Thursday: Toes Friday: Knees Saturday: Toes Sunday: Rest

Anonymous Rate my routine 03/21/24(Thu)12:43:03 No.73870352 Monday: Head Tuesday: Shoulders Wednesday: Knees 47 KB JPG Thursday: Toes Friday: Knees Saturday: Toes Sunday: Rest

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How lucky am I to have had something so hard to say goodbye to. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 21 KB JPG 07/07/24(Sun)09:25:19 No.36432801 >i remember going to the shelter with dad to pick a puppy >i remember how you ran into my arms >its not that i picked you, but rather that you picked me >i named you blossom, and from that day you've been my best friend. >i remember how you always knew when i was sad >i remember how you let me s-- into your fur when mom left >i remember how you were the only one didnt stare at me when i started looking different >you didnt judge me like everyone else did >you unconditionally accepted me for who i was >i remember how you used to wait for the mailman >he would always bring treats for you, and i know he loved you too. >i remember how goofy you were when we played fetch >you always ran for the ball even if i didnt throw it >i remember that this time i threw the ball a little too hard >it rolled into the street >you ran for it at full speed >i remember a white sedan going way too fast >i called your name, but it was too late. >i remember hearing a thud, and seeing blood splatter on the car >i remember how it never stopped or slowed down >i ran to you faster than ive ever run in my life >i remember how bent your leg was >we rushed you to the vet. >i held you in my arms the entire way there. >i remember how dark your blood was >i begged them to save you >the vet came out, and i looked to him, >he only answered in silence. >there was only one thing we could do for you >i found you on a table, your blood soaked the white sheet. >i cried in your fur one last time, and you licked my face as if to say goodbye. >the vet stuck you with a syringe >i remember your wimpers, god, ill never forget. >i held your paw the entire time. >i never wanted to let go, but i knew you were already gone. >youve left this world, but i know youre prancing in sunflower meadows waiting for me. >i feel selfish, because i want you to stay so bad, and now youre not here to cry with me. >i remember it all. and i dont think ill ever forget. >i can only hope that i gave you as much love as you gave me.

Anonymous 21 KB JPG 07/07/24(Sun)09:25:19 No.36432801 >i remember going to the shelter with dad to pick a puppy >i remember how you ran into my arms >its not that i picked you, but rather that you picked me >i named you blossom, and from that day you've been my best friend. >i remember how you always knew when i was sad >i remember how you let me s-- into your fur when mom left >i remember how you were the only one didnt stare at me when i started looking different >you didnt judge me like everyone else did >you unconditionally accepted me for who i was >i remember how you used to wait for the mailman >he would always bring treats for you, and i know he loved you too. >i remember how goofy you were when we played fetch >you always ran for the ball even if i didnt throw it >i remember that this time i threw the ball a little too hard >it rolled into the street >you ran for it at full speed >i remember a white sedan going way too fast >i called your name, but it was too late. >i remember hearing a thud, and seeing blood splatter on the car >i remember how it never stopped or slowed down >i ran to you faster than ive ever run in my life >i remember how bent your leg was >we rushed you to the vet. >i held you in my arms the entire way there. >i remember how dark your blood was >i begged them to save you >the vet came out, and i looked to him, >he only answered in silence. >there was only one thing we could do for you >i found you on a table, your blood soaked the white sheet. >i cried in your fur one last time, and you licked my face as if to say goodbye. >the vet stuck you with a syringe >i remember your wimpers, god, ill never forget. >i held your paw the entire time. >i never wanted to let go, but i knew you were already gone. >youve left this world, but i know youre prancing in sunflower meadows waiting for me. >i feel selfish, because i want you to stay so bad, and now youre not here to cry with me. >i remember it all. and i dont think ill ever forget. >i can only hope that i gave you as much love as you gave me.

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Active imagination | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/29/24(Sat) 19:45:35 No. 200657920 images - 2024-06-29T124222.448.jpg 22 KB JPG >random woman is nice to him for 5 seconds >imagines an entire relationship with her You don't do this, right /tv/?

Anonymous 06/29/24(Sat) 19:45:35 No. 200657920 images - 2024-06-29T124222.448.jpg 22 KB JPG >random woman is nice to him for 5 seconds >imagines an entire relationship with her You don't do this, right /tv/?

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Ancient Empire | /r/Greentext

N Anonymous 07/05/24(Fri)07:38:49 No.78050512 84761a89a574b7e05172966b238ac0a4.jpg >israel invades Palestine 125 KB JPG >somehow this is Palestine's fault

N Anonymous 07/05/24(Fri)07:38:49 No.78050512 84761a89a574b7e05172966b238ac0a4.jpg >israel invades Palestine 125 KB JPG >somehow this is Palestine's fault

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Devs thought of everything | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/06/24(Sat)05:27:31 No.681861531 1689560107596623.png 2.02 MB PNG >game setting has multiple sentient species >established in-universe racial slurs

: Anonymous 07/06/24(Sat)05:27:31 No.681861531 1689560107596623.png 2.02 MB PNG >game setting has multiple sentient species >established in-universe racial slurs

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Watching people grow up | /r/Greentext

Anonymous feels edition BORN TO FEEL 321 KB JPG 08/08/23(Tue)16:56:19 No.74313851 >be me in 2013 >age 21 >working as a server at a sushi restaurant >notice that this one kid comes with a girl pretty regularly (once every week or 2) >ask why they stop by so often >he says they had their first date here 6 months ago >feel happy for them but bittersweet >17 year old kids going on dates and I'm just a server >ffw to 2017 >they're still regulars >they come in to be seated and she has a ring on >congratulate them and get them free drinks >still feel sad because I'm still just a server >ffw to last week >they come in for a meal >girl stops me before I get their drinks and asks for no alcohol >she's pregnant >mfw I watched this couple go from high school kids on a date to married and starting a family >mfw I'm still just a server I feel so happy for them but I also feel so sad. Didn't know I could feel both of those things at once. Huh. 3 Replies View Thread

Anonymous feels edition BORN TO FEEL 321 KB JPG 08/08/23(Tue)16:56:19 No.74313851 >be me in 2013 >age 21 >working as a server at a sushi restaurant >notice that this one kid comes with a girl pretty regularly (once every week or 2) >ask why they stop by so often >he says they had their first date here 6 months ago >feel happy for them but bittersweet >17 year old kids going on dates and I'm just a server >ffw to 2017 >they're still regulars >they come in to be seated and she has a ring on >congratulate them and get them free drinks >still feel sad because I'm still just a server >ffw to last week >they come in for a meal >girl stops me before I get their drinks and asks for no alcohol >she's pregnant >mfw I watched this couple go from high school kids on a date to married and starting a family >mfw I'm still just a server I feel so happy for them but I also feel so sad. Didn't know I could feel both of those things at once. Huh. 3 Replies View Thread

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anon visits the zoo | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/07/2024, 13:12:28 No.31013465 > be me, 12 15 KB JPEG > zoo day, pumped for monkeys > get to feed them > small monkey comes over, takes snack from my hand > we lock eyes > he munches, throws poop > narrowly misses me, hits guy behind >mfw still love monkeys

Anonymous 07/07/2024, 13:12:28 No.31013465 > be me, 12 15 KB JPEG > zoo day, pumped for monkeys > get to feed them > small monkey comes over, takes snack from my hand > we lock eyes > he munches, throws poop > narrowly misses me, hits guy behind >mfw still love monkeys

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anon has a crush on his teacher | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Teachers you had a crush on 04/02/21(Fri)16:56:30 No.63023996 >2008, be 16 >Trip to France >Already have a thing for my teacher >Mid-late 30s, not *super* "businesswoman" look to her, also 135 KB JPG attractive, but she has a quite strict >France trip she dresses like pic related >Can't stop thinking about her >Friends make fun of me for having a crush on her >Don't care, continue to 'hang' near her and admire her >Eventually she catches on and pulls me to one side >Tells me she knows I like her and that i'm being inappropriate >Unironically crushed, feel like i've been rejected even though I knew deep down I had NO chance from the start

Anonymous Teachers you had a crush on 04/02/21(Fri)16:56:30 No.63023996 >2008, be 16 >Trip to France >Already have a thing for my teacher >Mid-late 30s, not *super* "businesswoman" look to her, also 135 KB JPG attractive, but she has a quite strict >France trip she dresses like pic related >Can't stop thinking about her >Friends make fun of me for having a crush on her >Don't care, continue to 'hang' near her and admire her >Eventually she catches on and pulls me to one side >Tells me she knows I like her and that i'm being inappropriate >Unironically crushed, feel like i've been rejected even though I knew deep down I had NO chance from the start

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