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Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)14:28:59 No.4842740 Cat logic literally be like: IMG_1860.jpg 72 KB JPG >you feed me and give me a home for 5+ years >you love me and pet me and snuggle me >you bring me toys and treats to spoil me >but you still might kill me and eat me at any moment because I heard a piece of paper slide across the floor
Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)14:28:59 No.4842740 Cat logic literally be like: IMG_1860.jpg 72 KB JPG >you feed me and give me a home for 5+ years >you love me and pet me and snuggle me >you bring me toys and treats to spoil me >but you still might kill me and eat me at any moment because I heard a piece of paper slide across the floor

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Anon reports the news in'it | /r/Greentext

B C ] Anonymous (ID: OFT8cm9x 08/26/24(Mon)08:08:23 No.479630546 >be BBC 5 min after a white dude sprees >Here's a picture of the gunman Mr. Twatcrumpet, who is known to have been radicalized on far right messageboards >coming up - Are lax laws on online hate speech to blame? >be BBC 5 months after a Syrian sprees >the Met have yet to release the suspect's identity and are still investigating why he was heard repeatedly screaming the Hawaiian word for "hello", followed by "snackbar" >coming up: Plus Size Association sues airliners for refusing to modernize their seats
B C ] Anonymous (ID: OFT8cm9x 08/26/24(Mon)08:08:23 No.479630546 >be BBC 5 min after a white dude sprees >Here's a picture of the gunman Mr. Twatcrumpet, who is known to have been radicalized on far right messageboards >coming up - Are lax laws on online hate speech to blame? >be BBC 5 months after a Syrian sprees >the Met have yet to release the suspect's identity and are still investigating why he was heard repeatedly screaming the Hawaiian word for "hello", followed by "snackbar" >coming up: Plus Size Association sues airliners for refusing to modernize their seats

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Anon has friends | /r/Greentext

Anyone else has this s---? >Be me >Have a friend >We used to message each other frequently >Then they became distant >No texting and no reading messages for MONTHS which is then followed by "Sorry I was busy uwu" which is b------- since their last online would be 10 min ago or something around this time >If they ever text you. it's either because it's Christmas (They text every single contact of theirs) or it's your birthday (Which they may not even remember about). >This s--- happens too often to be a coincidence that it started to feel like a conspiracy because there is no realistic way why so many people are distant and almost never text what should I do in situations like these anons?
Anyone else has this s---? >Be me >Have a friend >We used to message each other frequently >Then they became distant >No texting and no reading messages for MONTHS which is then followed by "Sorry I was busy uwu" which is b------- since their last online would be 10 min ago or something around this time >If they ever text you. it's either because it's Christmas (They text every single contact of theirs) or it's your birthday (Which they may not even remember about). >This s--- happens too often to be a coincidence that it started to feel like a conspiracy because there is no realistic way why so many people are distant and almost never text what should I do in situations like these anons?

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Anon turns 30 | /r/Greentext

>cold approach girls online for sexo >old ones agree, then say i'm too young, their youngest son is older than me >young ones agree, then say i'm too old, i could be their dad so being 30 is really the worst of both worlds. huh
>cold approach girls online for sexo >old ones agree, then say i'm too young, their youngest son is older than me >young ones agree, then say i'm too old, i could be their dad so being 30 is really the worst of both worlds. huh

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Anon Likes Garth Marenghi's Darkplace (2004) | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_5780.jpg (40 KB, 457x319) ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)09:59:35 No.202894147 ► File: images-143.jpg (20 KB, 659x465) ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:10:28 No.202887745 >>202890290 >>202890305 >>202893472 >>202893632 >>202897381 >>202902989 >I'm Garth Marenghi. Author. Dreamweaver. Visionary. Plus actor. You're about to enter the world of my imagination. You are entering my Darkplace. ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:45:21 No.202888767 >>202888985 They should pay you a hero's wage. >I'm not jesus chroist, i know that now. Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:52:03 No.202888985 >>202888767 >... >nevertakedrugs >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)08:51:11 No.202892413 ►>>202892462 >>202894147 File: 1644696305299.png (427 KB, 470x700) All I do is sit at the typewriter and start hitting the keys. I know writers who use subtext, and they're all cowards >>202892413 Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 11:53:33 No.202897381 >>202887745 (OP) You and he were, mmmbuddies, weren't you? ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)11:56:17 No.202897464 blood? blood >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 12:02:33 No.202897696 ► >>202897464 >>202897696 >"Mike stared in disbelief as his hands fell off. From them arose millions of tiny maggots. Maggots? Maggots... Maggots. Maggots! MAGGOTS!" >"Maggots" >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)12:25:11 No.202898442 ► >> >>If Won Ton finds out, my arse is grass, and he's got a lawnmower! You dig? ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 12:33:21 No.202898709 ► "She was like a candle in the wind. Unreliable." Is one of the best lines ever written in any show ever. >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 14:04:42 No.202901176 >>202902594 >>202903343 File: kinge.png (245 KB, 729x601) Stephen King ✪ @StephenKing Putin assumed the was dealing with a lapdog. What he got was a wolverine. Slava Ukraini! 9:43 AM 5/14/22 Twitter Web App 2,330 Retweets 149 Quote Tweets 17.3K Likes Getting them in the right order - that's the trick. That's the trick The commentary parts are f------ great. >> Is Garth Steven King? Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 15:16:49 No.202902594 >>202901176 He's way more Clive Barker >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 15:58:40 No.202903343 ► >>202901176 He's the only author who has written more books than he has read. So yes.
File: IMG_5780.jpg (40 KB, 457x319) ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)09:59:35 No.202894147 ► File: images-143.jpg (20 KB, 659x465) ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:10:28 No.202887745 >>202890290 >>202890305 >>202893472 >>202893632 >>202897381 >>202902989 >I'm Garth Marenghi. Author. Dreamweaver. Visionary. Plus actor. You're about to enter the world of my imagination. You are entering my Darkplace. ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:45:21 No.202888767 >>202888985 They should pay you a hero's wage. >I'm not jesus chroist, i know that now. Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)06:52:03 No.202888985 >>202888767 >... >nevertakedrugs >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)08:51:11 No.202892413 ►>>202892462 >>202894147 File: 1644696305299.png (427 KB, 470x700) All I do is sit at the typewriter and start hitting the keys. I know writers who use subtext, and they're all cowards >>202892413 Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 11:53:33 No.202897381 >>202887745 (OP) You and he were, mmmbuddies, weren't you? ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)11:56:17 No.202897464 blood? blood >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 12:02:33 No.202897696 ► >>202897464 >>202897696 >"Mike stared in disbelief as his hands fell off. From them arose millions of tiny maggots. Maggots? Maggots... Maggots. Maggots! MAGGOTS!" >"Maggots" >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)12:25:11 No.202898442 ► >> >>If Won Ton finds out, my arse is grass, and he's got a lawnmower! You dig? ☐ Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 12:33:21 No.202898709 ► "She was like a candle in the wind. Unreliable." Is one of the best lines ever written in any show ever. >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 14:04:42 No.202901176 >>202902594 >>202903343 File: kinge.png (245 KB, 729x601) Stephen King ✪ @StephenKing Putin assumed the was dealing with a lapdog. What he got was a wolverine. Slava Ukraini! 9:43 AM 5/14/22 Twitter Web App 2,330 Retweets 149 Quote Tweets 17.3K Likes Getting them in the right order - that's the trick. That's the trick The commentary parts are f------ great. >> Is Garth Steven King? Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 15:16:49 No.202902594 >>202901176 He's way more Clive Barker >> Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon) 15:58:40 No.202903343 ► >>202901176 He's the only author who has written more books than he has read. So yes.

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Anon would never buy a luxury car | /r/Greentext

Anonymous How does a minimalist man find(...) kat hasty @kathasty guys really live in apartments like this and don't see any issue 12/12/18, 7:15 PM 102 KB JPG 'college student' 08/26/24(Mon)08:58:27 No.31889576 this meme unironically came to life for me. >gf broke up with me because she was horrified by my lifestyle >started a big fight and she dumped everything that she hated about my life >didn't like how I lived like a >didn't like how my apartment wasn't cozy >didn't like how I had nothing on the walls >didn't like how my couch was cheap >didn't like how I didn't have a rug on the floor >didn't like how I didn't have a kitchen table >didn't like how I ate out 2-3 times a week (it wasn't a health reason im physically fit) >didn't like how I had workout equipment taking up space >didn't like how dusty the TV stand was (ok this ones fair but I would have dusted it better if I knew) >was disappointed when I said I would never buy a luxury car It's also not because I'm poor btw, I have a good career and savings. I was also super generous in the relationship with dates and trips. I just gave her the ick.
Anonymous How does a minimalist man find(...) kat hasty @kathasty guys really live in apartments like this and don't see any issue 12/12/18, 7:15 PM 102 KB JPG 'college student' 08/26/24(Mon)08:58:27 No.31889576 this meme unironically came to life for me. >gf broke up with me because she was horrified by my lifestyle >started a big fight and she dumped everything that she hated about my life >didn't like how I lived like a >didn't like how my apartment wasn't cozy >didn't like how I had nothing on the walls >didn't like how my couch was cheap >didn't like how I didn't have a rug on the floor >didn't like how I didn't have a kitchen table >didn't like how I ate out 2-3 times a week (it wasn't a health reason im physically fit) >didn't like how I had workout equipment taking up space >didn't like how dusty the TV stand was (ok this ones fair but I would have dusted it better if I knew) >was disappointed when I said I would never buy a luxury car It's also not because I'm poor btw, I have a good career and savings. I was also super generous in the relationship with dates and trips. I just gave her the ick.

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Growing up | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/19/24(Mon)01:45:21 No.202643109 1669237233183352.png 595 KB PNG >ONCE YOU'RE 18, YOU'RE OUT! Why is this trope so common in American TV shows? This would never happen in real life.
Anonymous 08/19/24(Mon)01:45:21 No.202643109 1669237233183352.png 595 KB PNG >ONCE YOU'RE 18, YOU'RE OUT! Why is this trope so common in American TV shows? This would never happen in real life.

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Life is deranged | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/11/24(Tue) 07:53:29 No.679315376 HARD CHOICES IN GAMING Bacon omelette. Belgian waffle. IMG_3873.png 703 KB PNG >game sells itself as having "choices that matter and affect the storyline" >the only choice that matters is the final one >game only has two possible endings I hate this s---
: Anonymous 06/11/24(Tue) 07:53:29 No.679315376 HARD CHOICES IN GAMING Bacon omelette. Belgian waffle. IMG_3873.png 703 KB PNG >game sells itself as having "choices that matter and affect the storyline" >the only choice that matters is the final one >game only has two possible endings I hate this s---

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Anon got bamboozled | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG like me 08/25/24(Sun)14:40:13 No.201418717 >Fell for the trad Asian waifu meme back in 2016 >Married a 7/10 Japanese tourist and turned her into a trad housewife >Had our first and only daughter in 2017 >Thought it was gonna be an epic bleaching like /pol/ told me and my kid would be blonde and blue eyed >Kiddo is basically 100% Asian, looks identical to any other J-- kid >Only sign of being a hapa is chestnut brown hair >People don't believe me when I say she's my daughter, they think I'm a cuck >Had the police called on me at the park because Karen thought I abducted an Asian child >Wife teases me for it, says other wives ask what Asian country the father is from >tfw she taughter daughter Japanese >tfw she's pregnant again >tfw genetic line dies with me Don't fall for the meme bros. I am a genetic dead end. Learn from my mistakes. Biggest regret of my life.
Anonymous 8 KB JPG like me 08/25/24(Sun)14:40:13 No.201418717 >Fell for the trad Asian waifu meme back in 2016 >Married a 7/10 Japanese tourist and turned her into a trad housewife >Had our first and only daughter in 2017 >Thought it was gonna be an epic bleaching like /pol/ told me and my kid would be blonde and blue eyed >Kiddo is basically 100% Asian, looks identical to any other J-- kid >Only sign of being a hapa is chestnut brown hair >People don't believe me when I say she's my daughter, they think I'm a cuck >Had the police called on me at the park because Karen thought I abducted an Asian child >Wife teases me for it, says other wives ask what Asian country the father is from >tfw she taughter daughter Japanese >tfw she's pregnant again >tfw genetic line dies with me Don't fall for the meme bros. I am a genetic dead end. Learn from my mistakes. Biggest regret of my life.

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Anon uses Reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.52 MB PNG 08/25/24(Sun)17:52:50 No.78624 >hates Twitter and says it's dead >look inside >80% of popular posts are just screenshots from Twitter
: Anonymous 1.52 MB PNG 08/25/24(Sun)17:52:50 No.78624 >hates Twitter and says it's dead >look inside >80% of popular posts are just screenshots from Twitter

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The meme candidate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: FVHA717E 08/18/24(Sun) 20:12:23 No.478749594 CERTIFIED FRESH Rotten Tomatoes 80% Tomatometer 235 Reviews >brat meme dead 17% Audience Score 25,000+ Ratings @nicksdankmemess 1722701124771691.jpg 72 KB JPG >coconut meme dead >weird meme dead What can we expect next from the Kamala meme committee?
Anonymous (ID: FVHA717E 08/18/24(Sun) 20:12:23 No.478749594 CERTIFIED FRESH Rotten Tomatoes 80% Tomatometer 235 Reviews >brat meme dead 17% Audience Score 25,000+ Ratings @nicksdankmemess 1722701124771691.jpg 72 KB JPG >coconut meme dead >weird meme dead What can we expect next from the Kamala meme committee?

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Anon likes that gummy feeling | /r/Greentext

File: 1396677992428.jpg-(22 KB, 640x480, Misty-got-shy-misty-27762(...).jpg) GI Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:06 UTC-4 No. 104998391 Replies: >>104998869 >>104999198 >>104999624 >>105000212 >>105000496 >>105002561 >>105006150 >>105014103 >>105015128 >>105016361 >>105017381 Who was your first anime crush? >>105016500 >>105022352 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:12 UTC-4 No. 104998681 Replies: >>104998734 >>104999590 >>104999879 >>104999927 >>105000915 >>105004467 >>105005046 >>105005091 >>105010804 >>105011756 >>105012143 >>105014174 File: 1396678342356.jpg-(21 KB, 324x239, karitailmon.jpg) GI Not the cat • Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 02:13 UTC-4 No. 104998734 >>104998681 I had a crush on her brother instead. I'm a possible homosexual, and I'm okay with that. Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:15 UTC-4 No. 104998832 Replies: >>104999198 >>105006050 >>105016455 File: 1396678542698.jpg-(36 KB, 412x561, washu.jpg) GI ☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)12:27 UTC-4 No.105020372 Replies: >>105020442 >>105020503 >>105020512 >>105020522 >>105020719 File: 1396715269791.png-(141 KB, 400x300, 138.png) GI I don't even ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:30 UTC-4 No. 105020503 Replies: >>>105021092 >>>105021423 >>105021519 >>105021671 >>105023399 >>105020372 It's fine, man. You can't control what your d--- does as a kid. I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi. You get over it eventually. • Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:40 UTC-4 No.105021092 Replies: >>105021191 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:51 UTC-4 No.105021671 File: 1396716054374.jpg-(148 KB, 723x600, 1296970207703.jpg) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi File: 1396716669808.png-(189 KB, 500x342, 1344719524146.png) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi you can't be serious Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)12:46 UTC-4 No.105021423 File: 1396716417217.png-(90 KB, 225x248, only the dead can know pe(...).png) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:48 UTC-4 No.105021519 ile: 1396716506257.jpg-(31 KB, 400x400, 1394228424893.jpg) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi. You get over it eventually. Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:23 UTC-4 No.105023399 File: 1396718605643.gif-(450 KB, 488x275, Gin.gif) G >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi I love you /a/ ■ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:42 UTC-4 No. 105021191 Replies: >>105021331 >>105021388 >>105025102 >>105025937 >>105021092 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:38 UTC-4 No.1 File: 1396719538325.png-(229 KB, 709x711, On >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it the Jedi It was his raspy little voice and the way his mouth hung open a little bit. Like, you know he was dying but I wanted to stick my d--- in there while he tried to talk and cough around it. I wouldn't hurt him, but the thought of him lightly gumming my d--- while he tried to talk to Luke got me hard as a rock. ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:45 UTC-4 No. 105021331 File: 1396716329217.png-(94 KB, 317x274, 1334389824798.png) GI >>105021191 ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:52 UTC-4 No. 105025102 >>105021191 It's okay anon. I fapped to birth scenes on TV when I was a kid....actually I think your thing is worse.
File: 1396677992428.jpg-(22 KB, 640x480, Misty-got-shy-misty-27762(...).jpg) GI Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:06 UTC-4 No. 104998391 Replies: >>104998869 >>104999198 >>104999624 >>105000212 >>105000496 >>105002561 >>105006150 >>105014103 >>105015128 >>105016361 >>105017381 Who was your first anime crush? >>105016500 >>105022352 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:12 UTC-4 No. 104998681 Replies: >>104998734 >>104999590 >>104999879 >>104999927 >>105000915 >>105004467 >>105005046 >>105005091 >>105010804 >>105011756 >>105012143 >>105014174 File: 1396678342356.jpg-(21 KB, 324x239, karitailmon.jpg) GI Not the cat • Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 02:13 UTC-4 No. 104998734 >>104998681 I had a crush on her brother instead. I'm a possible homosexual, and I'm okay with that. Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)02:15 UTC-4 No. 104998832 Replies: >>104999198 >>105006050 >>105016455 File: 1396678542698.jpg-(36 KB, 412x561, washu.jpg) GI ☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)12:27 UTC-4 No.105020372 Replies: >>105020442 >>105020503 >>105020512 >>105020522 >>105020719 File: 1396715269791.png-(141 KB, 400x300, 138.png) GI I don't even ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:30 UTC-4 No. 105020503 Replies: >>>105021092 >>>105021423 >>105021519 >>105021671 >>105023399 >>105020372 It's fine, man. You can't control what your d--- does as a kid. I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi. You get over it eventually. • Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:40 UTC-4 No.105021092 Replies: >>105021191 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:51 UTC-4 No.105021671 File: 1396716054374.jpg-(148 KB, 723x600, 1296970207703.jpg) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi File: 1396716669808.png-(189 KB, 500x342, 1344719524146.png) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi you can't be serious Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat)12:46 UTC-4 No.105021423 File: 1396716417217.png-(90 KB, 225x248, only the dead can know pe(...).png) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:48 UTC-4 No.105021519 ile: 1396716506257.jpg-(31 KB, 400x400, 1394228424893.jpg) GI >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi. You get over it eventually. Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:23 UTC-4 No.105023399 File: 1396718605643.gif-(450 KB, 488x275, Gin.gif) G >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it to Yoda's death scene in Return of the Jedi I love you /a/ ■ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:42 UTC-4 No. 105021191 Replies: >>105021331 >>105021388 >>105025102 >>105025937 >>105021092 Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:38 UTC-4 No.1 File: 1396719538325.png-(229 KB, 709x711, On >>105020503 >I ended up jacking it the Jedi It was his raspy little voice and the way his mouth hung open a little bit. Like, you know he was dying but I wanted to stick my d--- in there while he tried to talk and cough around it. I wouldn't hurt him, but the thought of him lightly gumming my d--- while he tried to talk to Luke got me hard as a rock. ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 12:45 UTC-4 No. 105021331 File: 1396716329217.png-(94 KB, 317x274, 1334389824798.png) GI >>105021191 ☐☐ Anonymous 04/05/14(Sat) 13:52 UTC-4 No. 105025102 >>105021191 It's okay anon. I fapped to birth scenes on TV when I was a kid....actually I think your thing is worse.

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anon describes open office spaces | /r/Greentext

✓ Anonymous 08/25/24(Sun)22:35:41 No.102080437 >>102080496 1724608801598102.jpg (15 KB, 290x299) google yandex iqdb wait >HEY DAN DID YOU GET THAT EMAIL? >*slurp slurp slurp* >*some guy chewing with an open mouth* >*lip smacking* >YEAH NO I GOT THE EMAIL, YOU MOVED THE MEETING? >*chair creaking* >*beeep beep BEEEP** Teams call* >*fart!* >YEAH WE MOVED THE MEETING SINCE RANDY CALLED IN SICK >*burp* >*fingers cracking* >*SIGH* >HEY GET A ROOM YOU TWO >WHAT?! IM TAKING THIS TO HR >I JUST MEAN IM TRYING TO WORK HERE, BOOK A F------ MEETING ROOM >*cough* >*slurp slurp* >OH YOU WEREN'T BEING HOMOPHOBIC? >HUH? >I SAID- >*WhirrrrrrrRRRRR* *windows update* >*Zoom Call on some guy without headphone* >*keys clacking*
✓ Anonymous 08/25/24(Sun)22:35:41 No.102080437 >>102080496 1724608801598102.jpg (15 KB, 290x299) google yandex iqdb wait >HEY DAN DID YOU GET THAT EMAIL? >*slurp slurp slurp* >*some guy chewing with an open mouth* >*lip smacking* >YEAH NO I GOT THE EMAIL, YOU MOVED THE MEETING? >*chair creaking* >*beeep beep BEEEP** Teams call* >*fart!* >YEAH WE MOVED THE MEETING SINCE RANDY CALLED IN SICK >*burp* >*fingers cracking* >*SIGH* >HEY GET A ROOM YOU TWO >WHAT?! IM TAKING THIS TO HR >I JUST MEAN IM TRYING TO WORK HERE, BOOK A F------ MEETING ROOM >*cough* >*slurp slurp* >OH YOU WEREN'T BEING HOMOPHOBIC? >HUH? >I SAID- >*WhirrrrrrrRRRRR* *windows update* >*Zoom Call on some guy without headphone* >*keys clacking*

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What a dick. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/25/24(Sun)01:52:07 No.202870433 1720074011150.jpg 32 KB JPG >these people are richer than me therefore I am entitled to rob and abuse them What kind of logic is this?
Anonymous 08/25/24(Sun)01:52:07 No.202870433 1720074011150.jpg 32 KB JPG >these people are richer than me therefore I am entitled to rob and abuse them What kind of logic is this?

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Anon grunts | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 171 KB PNG 08/25/24(Sun)01:34:42 No. 78594250 >be me at work >girl co-worker walks by me and sighs in an exhausted sounding way >make an amused grunt sound to non-verbally relate to her sigh >she asks what that noise I made was >says it was "lowkey offensive" >panic and just say "sorry" >inb4 i get fired for sexual harassment for grunting View Thread
Anonymous 171 KB PNG 08/25/24(Sun)01:34:42 No. 78594250 >be me at work >girl co-worker walks by me and sighs in an exhausted sounding way >make an amused grunt sound to non-verbally relate to her sigh >she asks what that noise I made was >says it was "lowkey offensive" >panic and just say "sorry" >inb4 i get fired for sexual harassment for grunting View Thread

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Anons play RPG | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 88 KB JPG Level 1 fighter 03/23/20(Mon)06:10:10 No.71591141 As a GM, and a pretty damned fine one, I've banned martial classes from my table (5e) because they're so boring and useless. Level 1 wizard >I can move stuff with my mind! >hurrdurr I can hit with sword Level 20 wizard >can summon interplanar creatures and cause handfuls of dice of damage Level 20 fighter >hurr I hit it 3 times with my sword See the problem here? Players are not to bring martial classes to my table. Anonymous 03/23/20(Mon)15:38:26 No.71598243 >>71591141 (OP) # > I am a Barbarian > I have the highest hit die in the game (2x that of the Wizard) > i have a natural armor that allows me to tank damage without wearing anything > i have the rage ability which not only gives me resistance to the most common damage types in the game (Slashing, Piercing, and Bludgeoning) but also gives me proficiency on every melee attack. (This increases as i get more powerful) > by level 2, i can sense traps and deal more damage at the cost of getting more damage > by level 5, i can attack twice and move faster > by level 7, i gain advantage on initiative and cant be surprised at the beginning of combat > by level 9, i deal 3x damage on critical hits (this increases to 4x damage at level 13 and 5x damage at level 17) > by level 11, i gain the ability to not die if enraged > by level 15, my rage lasts an entire encounter > by level 18, my strength score can be used for strength checks and saving throws > by level 20, rage and all its benefits becomes permanent > decide to join group > DM tells me he doesn't allow Martial classes > he tells me martials a useless. > meanwhile, the wizard gets a paper cut and has to roll death saves.
Anonymous 88 KB JPG Level 1 fighter 03/23/20(Mon)06:10:10 No.71591141 As a GM, and a pretty damned fine one, I've banned martial classes from my table (5e) because they're so boring and useless. Level 1 wizard >I can move stuff with my mind! >hurrdurr I can hit with sword Level 20 wizard >can summon interplanar creatures and cause handfuls of dice of damage Level 20 fighter >hurr I hit it 3 times with my sword See the problem here? Players are not to bring martial classes to my table. Anonymous 03/23/20(Mon)15:38:26 No.71598243 >>71591141 (OP) # > I am a Barbarian > I have the highest hit die in the game (2x that of the Wizard) > i have a natural armor that allows me to tank damage without wearing anything > i have the rage ability which not only gives me resistance to the most common damage types in the game (Slashing, Piercing, and Bludgeoning) but also gives me proficiency on every melee attack. (This increases as i get more powerful) > by level 2, i can sense traps and deal more damage at the cost of getting more damage > by level 5, i can attack twice and move faster > by level 7, i gain advantage on initiative and cant be surprised at the beginning of combat > by level 9, i deal 3x damage on critical hits (this increases to 4x damage at level 13 and 5x damage at level 17) > by level 11, i gain the ability to not die if enraged > by level 15, my rage lasts an entire encounter > by level 18, my strength score can be used for strength checks and saving throws > by level 20, rage and all its benefits becomes permanent > decide to join group > DM tells me he doesn't allow Martial classes > he tells me martials a useless. > meanwhile, the wizard gets a paper cut and has to roll death saves.

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Anon plays Bloodborne | /r/Greentext

Anonymous B PS4. Only On PlayStation. Bloodborne 16 www.seguint Game of The Year Edition. JAPANStudio FROM SOFTWARE 97 KB JPG 08/24/24(Sat) 19:26:47 No.686607592 >Be me, its late at night >Mobs patrol with pitchforks and torches >The narrow streets are littered with bloody vials and needles >Some random prostitute quarantined in her home yells at me, "Away! Away! You're not wanted here!" >The begrimed alleyways are fogged with miasma and fetid smog. >Ogres armed with bricks, madmen with knives, vampires, werewolves, witches, corrupt ministers and lawmen. >Suddenly on the roof of a cathedral, a monstrous spider-like alien. >It grabs me and my mind shatters from the sheer horror. Just an average night in London. Pic unrelated.
Anonymous B PS4. Only On PlayStation. Bloodborne 16 www.seguint Game of The Year Edition. JAPANStudio FROM SOFTWARE 97 KB JPG 08/24/24(Sat) 19:26:47 No.686607592 >Be me, its late at night >Mobs patrol with pitchforks and torches >The narrow streets are littered with bloody vials and needles >Some random prostitute quarantined in her home yells at me, "Away! Away! You're not wanted here!" >The begrimed alleyways are fogged with miasma and fetid smog. >Ogres armed with bricks, madmen with knives, vampires, werewolves, witches, corrupt ministers and lawmen. >Suddenly on the roof of a cathedral, a monstrous spider-like alien. >It grabs me and my mind shatters from the sheer horror. Just an average night in London. Pic unrelated.

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Anon Is Irrational | /r/Greentext

File: 261417.jpg (9 KB, 200x268) ☐ Anonymous 08/23/24(Fri)15:16:33 No.37008648 >>37008666 >>37009129 >>37009604 >>37009802 >>37009905 >>37010387 >>37010641 >>37010814 >>37011040 >>37011227 >>37011243 >>37011246 >>37011376 >>37012138 >>37012365 >>37012533 >>37012541 >>37014737 >>37015592 >>37017912 >>37017949 >>37018136 >>37018161 >>37018798 >be me >far right trans girl dating a leftie chaser >I'm always telling him my beliefs about how the Holocaust didn't happen, outer space isn't real, black people aren't actually human beings but some middle ground between monkeys and humans, 5G causes cancer and it's specifically designed to do so so that the elites can cull humanity, etc >he usually clams up and goes silent >I ask him why my politics views seem to annoy him >"You have some really f------ bizarre viewpoints, but I'm not going to waste my time trying to debunk every bigoted viewpoint or conspiracy theory you s--- out. Can't reason someone out of a perspective they never reasoned themselves into to begin with." > "How do you know I didn't use reason to reach my beliefs?" >"Nobody who actually uses their head could believe the things you do. So either you're the dumbest, most wildly irrational person alive, or you just don't think about the stupid s--- you spew out before doing so." Why he so mad tho Anonymous 08/23/24(Fri)15:18:19 No.37008666 >>37008648 (OP) >top is rational and levelheaded >>37008693 >>37011123 >>37017989 >>37019153 >bottom is irrational and engages in magical thinking what a surprise
File: 261417.jpg (9 KB, 200x268) ☐ Anonymous 08/23/24(Fri)15:16:33 No.37008648 >>37008666 >>37009129 >>37009604 >>37009802 >>37009905 >>37010387 >>37010641 >>37010814 >>37011040 >>37011227 >>37011243 >>37011246 >>37011376 >>37012138 >>37012365 >>37012533 >>37012541 >>37014737 >>37015592 >>37017912 >>37017949 >>37018136 >>37018161 >>37018798 >be me >far right trans girl dating a leftie chaser >I'm always telling him my beliefs about how the Holocaust didn't happen, outer space isn't real, black people aren't actually human beings but some middle ground between monkeys and humans, 5G causes cancer and it's specifically designed to do so so that the elites can cull humanity, etc >he usually clams up and goes silent >I ask him why my politics views seem to annoy him >"You have some really f------ bizarre viewpoints, but I'm not going to waste my time trying to debunk every bigoted viewpoint or conspiracy theory you s--- out. Can't reason someone out of a perspective they never reasoned themselves into to begin with." > "How do you know I didn't use reason to reach my beliefs?" >"Nobody who actually uses their head could believe the things you do. So either you're the dumbest, most wildly irrational person alive, or you just don't think about the stupid s--- you spew out before doing so." Why he so mad tho Anonymous 08/23/24(Fri)15:18:19 No.37008666 >>37008648 (OP) >top is rational and levelheaded >>37008693 >>37011123 >>37017989 >>37019153 >bottom is irrational and engages in magical thinking what a surprise

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Sudden Strike | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed) 05:45:45 No.4842528 PXL 20240716_205036565~3.jpg >100 degrees out 2.13 MB JPG >Faggy little hairy Himalayan lap dog insists on going outside and sun bathing W-- is his problem
Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed) 05:45:45 No.4842528 PXL 20240716_205036565~3.jpg >100 degrees out 2.13 MB JPG >Faggy little hairy Himalayan lap dog insists on going outside and sun bathing W-- is his problem

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Talent before looks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)13:53:08 No.202623829 1697451418468901.jpg 139 KB JPG >JJ Abrams' daughter >a literal 10/10 >failed to make it in Hollywood why?
: Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)13:53:08 No.202623829 1697451418468901.jpg 139 KB JPG >JJ Abrams' daughter >a literal 10/10 >failed to make it in Hollywood why?

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