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Anon discuss literary master sister trio | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11 KB JPG 05/25/24(Sat)16:24:40 No.23422918 >be final surviving member of literary master sister trio >Destroy your sisters works because they're, idk, bad or offensive or whatever >Go down in history as the most talented and celebrated of the trio Why are women like this?
Anonymous 11 KB JPG 05/25/24(Sat)16:24:40 No.23422918 >be final surviving member of literary master sister trio >Destroy your sisters works because they're, idk, bad or offensive or whatever >Go down in history as the most talented and celebrated of the trio Why are women like this?

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Anon almost dies from norovirus | /r/Greentext

Anonymous THESE STUPID PIECES OF S--- CA(...) 05/25/24(Sat)03:19:01 No.2735828 avity Bag 9060 991 KB PNG >be a few hours innawoods camping >filter water with one of these badboys from a large, clear water lake >go to s--- one night, open my ass and its like the bathtub faucet was turned on >never shat like that in my life >whole camp is wretching within hours >we later learn we likely caught norovirus >am the only one strong enough to carry much gear and another guy has to be carried out >other guy is completely fine along with me, but within an hour he's keeled over puking everywhere barely keeping his face off the ground >we start the drive back >can't even make it, have to pull into a motel next to a hospital >within hours, we are delirious from dehydration as we puke 3.5x the volume of whatever we can drink >barely able to lift myself out of bed, make the call we gotta go to the hospital >collapse in the entry way, scared of my own reflection in the mirror when I see it >doctor hooks us up to IV >no longer insane after 15 minutes of the jesus hydration gravy train >tells me I was starting to die from dehydration >turns out these filters advertise as safe for camping, but very few filter viruses, and those that do are ultra slow DON'T USE THESE S------- EVER. ITS NOT WORTH IT. USE PURIFICATION TABS AND/OR BOIL WATER 20 Replies View Thread
Anonymous THESE STUPID PIECES OF S--- CA(...) 05/25/24(Sat)03:19:01 No.2735828 avity Bag 9060 991 KB PNG >be a few hours innawoods camping >filter water with one of these badboys from a large, clear water lake >go to s--- one night, open my ass and its like the bathtub faucet was turned on >never shat like that in my life >whole camp is wretching within hours >we later learn we likely caught norovirus >am the only one strong enough to carry much gear and another guy has to be carried out >other guy is completely fine along with me, but within an hour he's keeled over puking everywhere barely keeping his face off the ground >we start the drive back >can't even make it, have to pull into a motel next to a hospital >within hours, we are delirious from dehydration as we puke 3.5x the volume of whatever we can drink >barely able to lift myself out of bed, make the call we gotta go to the hospital >collapse in the entry way, scared of my own reflection in the mirror when I see it >doctor hooks us up to IV >no longer insane after 15 minutes of the jesus hydration gravy train >tells me I was starting to die from dehydration >turns out these filters advertise as safe for camping, but very few filter viruses, and those that do are ultra slow DON'T USE THESE S------- EVER. ITS NOT WORTH IT. USE PURIFICATION TABS AND/OR BOIL WATER 20 Replies View Thread

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Anon analyzes a certain Pokémon episode. | /r/Greentext

►Anonymous 01/27/16 (Wed) 19:33:33 ID: bef0a2 No.4737009 File (hide): 1453952013985.png (Spoiler Image, 151.84 KB, 549x322, 549:322, hero of the episode.png) >>4734029 No movie I can think of but here's a cartoon, courtesy of /tv/'s thread on Angry Birds. It's the episode of Pokémon where the Charmander evolves. >Character of the week is Melvin the magician >He's not drawn like any other character in the show >>Shep haircut >>Big nose >>Beady little eyes >>The most heinous Jew accent ever to be on television >Vid of Melvin here: https://youtu.be /yymlq0tvGXo?t=1m38s The plot of the episode >Melvin's first seen getting scolded by a woman because he refuses to pay her >He's an eccentric cheapo >He is trying desperately to get into show business >Gets Misty on her own and pressures her into being his assistant and wearing a revealing outfit >He hypnotizes and brainwashes Ash to do all his work for him >Catches an army of Exeggutor and plans to use them to hypnotise everyone in town so they'll give him all their money (seriously) >Most important is pic related, the carnival owner who confronts Melvin about the army of Exeggutors and plans on firebombing them
►Anonymous 01/27/16 (Wed) 19:33:33 ID: bef0a2 No.4737009 File (hide): 1453952013985.png (Spoiler Image, 151.84 KB, 549x322, 549:322, hero of the episode.png) >>4734029 No movie I can think of but here's a cartoon, courtesy of /tv/'s thread on Angry Birds. It's the episode of Pokémon where the Charmander evolves. >Character of the week is Melvin the magician >He's not drawn like any other character in the show >>Shep haircut >>Big nose >>Beady little eyes >>The most heinous Jew accent ever to be on television >Vid of Melvin here: https://youtu.be /yymlq0tvGXo?t=1m38s The plot of the episode >Melvin's first seen getting scolded by a woman because he refuses to pay her >He's an eccentric cheapo >He is trying desperately to get into show business >Gets Misty on her own and pressures her into being his assistant and wearing a revealing outfit >He hypnotizes and brainwashes Ash to do all his work for him >Catches an army of Exeggutor and plans to use them to hypnotise everyone in town so they'll give him all their money (seriously) >Most important is pic related, the carnival owner who confronts Melvin about the army of Exeggutors and plans on firebombing them

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Anon has a medical condition | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)22:50:21 No.918852351 ile: IMG_1596.jpg (265 KB, 700x521) uncurable >Get BJ on prom night >Week later massive red spot on c--- >Herpes >F--- >doctor say this s--- is >No woman will want me >Struggle with shame and depression >Lose all interest in sex >Go years without being with a woman >Finally regain some self confidence >Brainwave.exe >Need woman who already has the disease >Find old h----- on craigslist >Looks pretty ragged on the blurred photo >Has probably had a million diseased cocks in her >Call her up >Explain I have herpes >Tell her I presume she has it too >Silence >Then she hangs up I dont know where to go from here bros
Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)22:50:21 No.918852351 ile: IMG_1596.jpg (265 KB, 700x521) uncurable >Get BJ on prom night >Week later massive red spot on c--- >Herpes >F--- >doctor say this s--- is >No woman will want me >Struggle with shame and depression >Lose all interest in sex >Go years without being with a woman >Finally regain some self confidence >Brainwave.exe >Need woman who already has the disease >Find old h----- on craigslist >Looks pretty ragged on the blurred photo >Has probably had a million diseased cocks in her >Call her up >Explain I have herpes >Tell her I presume she has it too >Silence >Then she hangs up I dont know where to go from here bros

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Ebrahim Anon | /r/Greentext

WRSEURSEU ♥ Anonymous (ID: TXt3pfDL) 05/20/24(Mon)09:37:57 No.468598033 >>46859814 >>468599719 >>468599737 >>468601013 >>468601040 >>468601492 >>468602086 >>4686 >spends +15 hours trying to locate crashed helicopter of nation's president >couldn't start search because it was raining >had to be given nightvision technology from turkey because their drones had no nightvision >still couldn't find the helicopter or their president >had to be given coordinates of crash by a third party that simply checked the heat map >thinks they can win a war against Israel and the West ☐☐ Anonymous (ID: fqU3c9Pt) 05/20/24(Mon)09:39:47 No.468598134 >>46859932 Cousin f------ 80 IQ Muslim bros... ☐ Anonymous (ID: Bknwc3x3) 05/20/24(Mon)09:39:53 No.468598141 >>468604488 >>468598033 (OP) pretty embarrassing desu
WRSEURSEU ♥ Anonymous (ID: TXt3pfDL) 05/20/24(Mon)09:37:57 No.468598033 >>46859814 >>468599719 >>468599737 >>468601013 >>468601040 >>468601492 >>468602086 >>4686 >spends +15 hours trying to locate crashed helicopter of nation's president >couldn't start search because it was raining >had to be given nightvision technology from turkey because their drones had no nightvision >still couldn't find the helicopter or their president >had to be given coordinates of crash by a third party that simply checked the heat map >thinks they can win a war against Israel and the West ☐☐ Anonymous (ID: fqU3c9Pt) 05/20/24(Mon)09:39:47 No.468598134 >>46859932 Cousin f------ 80 IQ Muslim bros... ☐ Anonymous (ID: Bknwc3x3) 05/20/24(Mon)09:39:53 No.468598141 >>468604488 >>468598033 (OP) pretty embarrassing desu

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What tf is wrong with them | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 37987271 >psychic energy vampires keep creeping at my window at night what's their f------ problem JPG | 62.03 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 13:10:48 3 hours ago 5 Replies 0 Images 2< REPLY
Anonymous 37987271 >psychic energy vampires keep creeping at my window at night what's their f------ problem JPG | 62.03 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 13:10:48 3 hours ago 5 Replies 0 Images 2< REPLY

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Anon deals with the devil | /r/Greentext

Anonymous I think I f----- up 10 KB JPG 05/23/24(Thu)21:20:34 No.37977423 >be me >having panic attack >pray to God to help me >nothing happens >pray to Satan to help me >feel better immediately >thinks to myself "damn I should pray to the devil more often >order food >food arrives >look at ticket number >666 >mfw How bad did I just f--- up? Will God forgive me for my sin? I'm scared bros
Anonymous I think I f----- up 10 KB JPG 05/23/24(Thu)21:20:34 No.37977423 >be me >having panic attack >pray to God to help me >nothing happens >pray to Satan to help me >feel better immediately >thinks to myself "damn I should pray to the devil more often >order food >food arrives >look at ticket number >666 >mfw How bad did I just f--- up? Will God forgive me for my sin? I'm scared bros

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Anon ponders about American politics | /r/Greentext

File: jrjfy4bxe4lc1.png (67 KB, 334x508) 1980 United States Senate election in North Carolina -1974 November 4, 1980 1986- Nominee John East Robert Morgan Party Republican Democratic Popular vote 898,064 887,653 Percentage 49.96% 49.38% Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed) 09:01:06 No.16331782 >named John East >wins every western district while losing in every eastern district What did he mean by this?
File: jrjfy4bxe4lc1.png (67 KB, 334x508) 1980 United States Senate election in North Carolina -1974 November 4, 1980 1986- Nominee John East Robert Morgan Party Republican Democratic Popular vote 898,064 887,653 Percentage 49.96% 49.38% Anonymous 02/28/24(Wed) 09:01:06 No.16331782 >named John East >wins every western district while losing in every eastern district What did he mean by this?

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Anon visits the family | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_20240524_104210293.jpg (635 KB, 3120x4160) We had to put a chicken down for /b/otulism Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)23:30:32 No.4805965 >Visit my folks for the weekend >He and mom have like 24 chickens I love chickens, I feel at peace when I'm surrounded by chickens >The chicks escape the greenhouse >Spend like 2 hours getting them back inside, see picrel >Dog mauled one of the chickens last week >Chicken is infected >Rotting black-green skin, maggots everywhere Dad tried bringing the chicken inside, cleaning it with isopropyl alcohol, and saving the chicken >LostCause.jpg >Takes chicken out back >Shoots it with a 12 gauge to euthanize it >It explodes >He gives it a viking funeral pyre This story ultimately adds up to nothing, I just am sad a chicken died
File: IMG_20240524_104210293.jpg (635 KB, 3120x4160) We had to put a chicken down for /b/otulism Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)23:30:32 No.4805965 >Visit my folks for the weekend >He and mom have like 24 chickens I love chickens, I feel at peace when I'm surrounded by chickens >The chicks escape the greenhouse >Spend like 2 hours getting them back inside, see picrel >Dog mauled one of the chickens last week >Chicken is infected >Rotting black-green skin, maggots everywhere Dad tried bringing the chicken inside, cleaning it with isopropyl alcohol, and saving the chicken >LostCause.jpg >Takes chicken out back >Shoots it with a 12 gauge to euthanize it >It explodes >He gives it a viking funeral pyre This story ultimately adds up to nothing, I just am sad a chicken died

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Anon is a sleuth | /r/Greentext

File: 1507418676688-468x475.png (239 KB, 468x475) ☐ Anonymous 05/25/24(Sat)01:07:28 No.918858168 >guy on grindr with no pic constantly hounding me bc he's super close >don't respond to him just ignore it >roommate goes camping >all of a sudden grindr guy isn't so close >curious >look up campsite >16 miles away >look at grindr guy >16 miles away >oh f--- I think my roommates banging the grindr guy Anonymous 05/25/24(Sat)01:09:20 No.918858263 >>918858168 How is the conclusion not that the roommate is the grindr guy?
File: 1507418676688-468x475.png (239 KB, 468x475) ☐ Anonymous 05/25/24(Sat)01:07:28 No.918858168 >guy on grindr with no pic constantly hounding me bc he's super close >don't respond to him just ignore it >roommate goes camping >all of a sudden grindr guy isn't so close >curious >look up campsite >16 miles away >look at grindr guy >16 miles away >oh f--- I think my roommates banging the grindr guy Anonymous 05/25/24(Sat)01:09:20 No.918858263 >>918858168 How is the conclusion not that the roommate is the grindr guy?

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Anon is oblivious | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 239 KB PNG >16 miles away >oh f--- 05/24/24(Fri)22:07:28 No.918858168 >guy on grindr with no pic constantly hounding me bc he's super close >don't respond to him just ignore it >roommate goes camping >all of a sudden grindr guy isn't so close >curious >look up campsite >16 miles away >look at grindr guy I think my roommates banging the grindr guy : Anonymous >>918858168 (OP) # 05/24/24(Fri)22:09:20 No.918858263 How is the conclusion not that the roommate is the grindr guy?
: Anonymous 239 KB PNG >16 miles away >oh f--- 05/24/24(Fri)22:07:28 No.918858168 >guy on grindr with no pic constantly hounding me bc he's super close >don't respond to him just ignore it >roommate goes camping >all of a sudden grindr guy isn't so close >curious >look up campsite >16 miles away >look at grindr guy I think my roommates banging the grindr guy : Anonymous >>918858168 (OP) # 05/24/24(Fri)22:09:20 No.918858263 How is the conclusion not that the roommate is the grindr guy?

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Abnormal activity | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 117 KB JPG 03/27/24(Wed)03:21:46 No.37549755 >get phone stolen one night >get home in the early hours of the morning >open bedroom door >phone is on floor My whole worldview changed. Not larping
: Anonymous 117 KB JPG 03/27/24(Wed)03:21:46 No.37549755 >get phone stolen one night >get home in the early hours of the morning >open bedroom door >phone is on floor My whole worldview changed. Not larping

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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAÀAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11526537 AAAAAAA AAAAAA AAAAAA ААААААААААААААААААААААА AAAA JPG | 27.86 KB AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA Friday 2024-05-24 20:28:08 7 hours ago АААААААААААААА AAAAAAA ААААААААААААААААААААААА AAAAAA AAAAAA AAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAA AAAAAAAA
Anonymous 11526537 AAAAAAA AAAAAA AAAAAA ААААААААААААААААААААААА AAAA JPG | 27.86 KB AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA Friday 2024-05-24 20:28:08 7 hours ago АААААААААААААА AAAAAAA ААААААААААААААААААААААА AAAAAA AAAAAA AAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAA AAAAAAAA

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Anon loves wierd girls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous JPG | 37.30 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 00:57:37 2 hours ago 77606165 Why Weird Girls Rule >be me >high school sophomore >awkward AF, no game >one day notice this girl in math class >always sits alone, nose in a book, total weirdo 4 Replies 1 Image >decide to sit next to her because why not >silence so loud I can hear my own cringe >ask her what she's reading >her eyes light up like I just offered her a million bucks >starts talking about dragons and wizards like it's a TED talk >turns out she's into sci-fi and fantasy, same weird stuff I'm into >start talking more, she's actually cool in a "I don't talk to people" way >start sitting together at lunch, bonding over nerdy stuff >she's basically Hermione Granger, helps me with homework >one day she invites me over to her place >expecting a haunted house, turns out her family's normal >spend the day watching old sci-f movies and playing vintage vide >realize I'm catching feels for this quirky book goblin >nervous but decide to confess my feelings >after school, tell her I like her >its raining >its cold >she looks like a tomato >think I've just committed social suicide >she looks up, smiles, says she likes me too mfw no regrets still together, still geeking out over dragons and spaceships REPLY
Anonymous JPG | 37.30 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 00:57:37 2 hours ago 77606165 Why Weird Girls Rule >be me >high school sophomore >awkward AF, no game >one day notice this girl in math class >always sits alone, nose in a book, total weirdo 4 Replies 1 Image >decide to sit next to her because why not >silence so loud I can hear my own cringe >ask her what she's reading >her eyes light up like I just offered her a million bucks >starts talking about dragons and wizards like it's a TED talk >turns out she's into sci-fi and fantasy, same weird stuff I'm into >start talking more, she's actually cool in a "I don't talk to people" way >start sitting together at lunch, bonding over nerdy stuff >she's basically Hermione Granger, helps me with homework >one day she invites me over to her place >expecting a haunted house, turns out her family's normal >spend the day watching old sci-f movies and playing vintage vide >realize I'm catching feels for this quirky book goblin >nervous but decide to confess my feelings >after school, tell her I like her >its raining >its cold >she looks like a tomato >think I've just committed social suicide >she looks up, smiles, says she likes me too mfw no regrets still together, still geeking out over dragons and spaceships REPLY

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Anon doesn't want a gf | /r/Greentext

Anonymous JPG | 127.67 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 03:01:47 9 minutes ago 77607513 Why would have a girlfriend? >I need you to pick me up from b------- nowhere >How come you don't have that promotion yet? >I'm not in the mood right now >What do you mean you didn't make reservations? >I thought you would've spent more on my birthday >Why don't you buy some new clothes? >If we're going to have a wedding I need you to earn more >I wasn't cheating I was just flirting F--- this s--- 0 Replies 0 Images REPLY
Anonymous JPG | 127.67 KB Saturday 2024-05-25 03:01:47 9 minutes ago 77607513 Why would have a girlfriend? >I need you to pick me up from b------- nowhere >How come you don't have that promotion yet? >I'm not in the mood right now >What do you mean you didn't make reservations? >I thought you would've spent more on my birthday >Why don't you buy some new clothes? >If we're going to have a wedding I need you to earn more >I wasn't cheating I was just flirting F--- this s--- 0 Replies 0 Images REPLY

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Anon trying to sleep | /r/Greentext

BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK 68 KB JPG : Anonymous >>806284614 (OP) # 08/04/19(Sun)19:05:55 No.806284768 SHUT THE F--- UP IM TRYING TO SLEEP >>806284792 #
BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK 68 KB JPG : Anonymous >>806284614 (OP) # 08/04/19(Sun)19:05:55 No.806284768 SHUT THE F--- UP IM TRYING TO SLEEP >>806284792 #

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Resourcefulness | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)19:40:07 No.76887705 1624823782052.png 123 KB PNG >You have to contribute to society Why?
: Anonymous 03/24/24(Sun)19:40:07 No.76887705 1624823782052.png 123 KB PNG >You have to contribute to society Why?

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Anon goes to France | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 52818309 416.0 KB PNG >visit france >they use "le" unironically 4 min. ago
Anonymous | 52818309 416.0 KB PNG >visit france >they use "le" unironically 4 min. ago

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Anon makes a mess | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >be 18 06/22/22(Sat) 09:49:54 No.876784436 >at second house party >drank a bit too much everything this wavy >brrrrrrrpppppppttthhhhhsss.wav >go outside >use hand as first responder >covered in s---, wipe on wall, go back inside 670 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/22/22(Sat)09:54:04 No.876784458 i've also s--- myself at a party once, used the bathroom for 30 minutes ultimately i just smeared it in s--- and ran lol >>876784489 #
: Anonymous >be 18 06/22/22(Sat) 09:49:54 No.876784436 >at second house party >drank a bit too much everything this wavy >brrrrrrrpppppppttthhhhhsss.wav >go outside >use hand as first responder >covered in s---, wipe on wall, go back inside 670 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/22/22(Sat)09:54:04 No.876784458 i've also s--- myself at a party once, used the bathroom for 30 minutes ultimately i just smeared it in s--- and ran lol >>876784489 #

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Anons discuss society | /r/Greentext

File: RDT 20240513 174315717820(...).png (756 KB, 1080x1350) Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)07:10:25 No.77600483 [Reply] >>77601035 >>77601127 In my ideal society people are segregated into those who do physical and mental work. There will be four classes. >Untouchables: do work that makes you dirty or sweaty >Servants: do cleaner physical work >Managers: do mental work that involves interacting with physical workers >Nobles: do work that is purely mental and free from having to interact with physical workers People will only be allowed to interact with the classes directly above them to receive orders or those directly below them to give orders. Anyone who does things that are not befitting their class, like being dirty, will be punished by demotion to a more fitting class. In order to ensure a balance of the classes, every class will receive a certain number of licences for marriage and children. They will be bred for their respective forms of work. Anyone who has sex outside of these rules will be killed along with any bastard spawn which may have been created. 4 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)08:40:49 No.77601035 >>77601081 >>77600483 (OP) >>77600491 Your parents should have beaten you
File: RDT 20240513 174315717820(...).png (756 KB, 1080x1350) Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)07:10:25 No.77600483 [Reply] >>77601035 >>77601127 In my ideal society people are segregated into those who do physical and mental work. There will be four classes. >Untouchables: do work that makes you dirty or sweaty >Servants: do cleaner physical work >Managers: do mental work that involves interacting with physical workers >Nobles: do work that is purely mental and free from having to interact with physical workers People will only be allowed to interact with the classes directly above them to receive orders or those directly below them to give orders. Anyone who does things that are not befitting their class, like being dirty, will be punished by demotion to a more fitting class. In order to ensure a balance of the classes, every class will receive a certain number of licences for marriage and children. They will be bred for their respective forms of work. Anyone who has sex outside of these rules will be killed along with any bastard spawn which may have been created. 4 replies and 1 image omitted. Click here to view. Anonymous 05/24/24(Fri)08:40:49 No.77601035 >>77601081 >>77600483 (OP) >>77600491 Your parents should have beaten you

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