Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

anon gets his mom's recommendin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)02:41:30 No.65173498 >be f------ me >mom tells me about black mirror and recommends one episode >keeps talking about it and decide to watch it so she shuts the hell up >its about some coomer that gets 38 KB JPG blackmailed because he watched loli p--- >tell her it was cool >tells me it reminded her of me Anons what the f--- did she mean by that? What the f--- does she know?
: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)02:41:30 No.65173498 >be f------ me >mom tells me about black mirror and recommends one episode >keeps talking about it and decide to watch it so she shuts the hell up >its about some coomer that gets 38 KB JPG blackmailed because he watched loli p--- >tell her it was cool >tells me it reminded her of me Anons what the f--- did she mean by that? What the f--- does she know?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism happy font

Anon is autistic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)19:41:24 No.65181098 >cute girl asks for my number >walk away without saying anything ITS F------ OVER. ITS. F------. OVER. TRULY THE 719 KB PNG MOST AUTISTIC F----- IN THIS WORLD. View Thread
: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)19:41:24 No.65181098 >cute girl asks for my number >walk away without saying anything ITS F------ OVER. ITS. F------. OVER. TRULY THE 719 KB PNG MOST AUTISTIC F----- IN THIS WORLD. View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon Goes For the Record | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:57:07 No.65173592 >goes on vacation for week >Doesn't s--- once >Gets home >Still doesn't s--- I'm literally on a roll here. Let's see how long I can keep this up. 18 KB JPG Pic unrelated
: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:57:07 No.65173592 >goes on vacation for week >Doesn't s--- once >Gets home >Still doesn't s--- I'm literally on a roll here. Let's see how long I can keep this up. 18 KB JPG Pic unrelated

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext organism font terrestrial plant

Anons are just pretending | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/20/21(Sun)21:19:38 No.64234583 Imagine if everyone else other than you on this board is actually a normie in real life and they were just playing along with the r9k Bdamy stock photo culture >what are you doing anon? >oh it's just this funny internet 128 KB JPG meme where we pretend to be virgins haha. >what? Why would you do that? >its just funny. We make fun of each other but we all know we are all just lying >look at this guy! Haha! He's saying he's 25 year old kissless virgin? >What? Does that kind of person even exist? >of course not. They are just saying it as a meme. here let me reply to him >'same. I am 5'6 and ugly. It's over for me. I cant even afford plastic surgery." >Anon just come to the bed with me >yea yea. after just one more post lol
: Anonymous 06/20/21(Sun)21:19:38 No.64234583 Imagine if everyone else other than you on this board is actually a normie in real life and they were just playing along with the r9k Bdamy stock photo culture >what are you doing anon? >oh it's just this funny internet 128 KB JPG meme where we pretend to be virgins haha. >what? Why would you do that? >its just funny. We make fun of each other but we all know we are all just lying >look at this guy! Haha! He's saying he's 25 year old kissless virgin? >What? Does that kind of person even exist? >of course not. They are just saying it as a meme. here let me reply to him >'same. I am 5'6 and ugly. It's over for me. I cant even afford plastic surgery." >Anon just come to the bed with me >yea yea. after just one more post lol

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon thinks evolution failed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)17:01:39 No.862040639 >be me >ram >tryna mate so gotta assert my dominance >this usually involves bashing my face into competing male rams on >the side of a f------ cliff >bunch of fine ass ram biddys 11 KB JPG watchin >winnertakeall.mp4 >theres no rules to this s--- >you be squarin up one dude and some d--- just side swipes you in the knees >rams just getting yeeted off this cliff until only I remain iamthealpharam.jpeg >battered and broken I go to collect my prizes butwaittheresmore.rip >some new beta says 1v1 me bro wherewereyouonthecliffmelee.bitch >hosed but I gotta accept >we bash our skulls together with enough force to kill a grown man >just keep smashing brain buckets like this until I eventually tap >beta cucks me out of my harem >they are only fertile two days a year how the f--- has evolution not wiped this species out of existence?
: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)17:01:39 No.862040639 >be me >ram >tryna mate so gotta assert my dominance >this usually involves bashing my face into competing male rams on >the side of a f------ cliff >bunch of fine ass ram biddys 11 KB JPG watchin >winnertakeall.mp4 >theres no rules to this s--- >you be squarin up one dude and some d--- just side swipes you in the knees >rams just getting yeeted off this cliff until only I remain iamthealpharam.jpeg >battered and broken I go to collect my prizes butwaittheresmore.rip >some new beta says 1v1 me bro wherewereyouonthecliffmelee.bitch >hosed but I gotta accept >we bash our skulls together with enough force to kill a grown man >just keep smashing brain buckets like this until I eventually tap >beta cucks me out of my harem >they are only fertile two days a year how the f--- has evolution not wiped this species out of existence?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

See You Later, Virgins | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is 5’8 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/30/21(Mon)00:55:36 No.65180548 >be me early 20s >unemployed >go to interview >a woman takes me to the door of PR room >another woman comes and talks 31 KB PNG to her and they both leave >as they get farther she says "are they hiring children?" Living life as a short man is a curse
: Anonymous 08/30/21(Mon)00:55:36 No.65180548 >be me early 20s >unemployed >go to interview >a woman takes me to the door of PR room >another woman comes and talks 31 KB PNG to her and they both leave >as they get farther she says "are they hiring children?" Living life as a short man is a curse

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext human body jaw rectangle font

Still Got a XBox Though | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/18(Sat)16:24:34 No.788547098 >be me >a few years ago >9 years old >it's Christmas Eve >we're staying at my uncle and aunts house , ours was being fumigated 50 KB JPG >I know l've been a p------------ all year so I just f------ knew Santa was gonna give me coal >get an idea >'ll atay up late and when he tries to give me coal l'll surprise him and just take whatever I want >perfect plan.jpg >so I sneak out of bed at about 10:30 and go down to the living room and hide behind the couch >wind up falling asleep >wake up because I hear a noise >ohfuckitssanta.wav >jump out to apprise that fat f--- >it wasn't Santa >it was my uncle f------ the ever loving s--- out of my mom on the couch. Merry f------ Christmas 9 yr old me.
: Anonymous 12/29/18(Sat)16:24:34 No.788547098 >be me >a few years ago >9 years old >it's Christmas Eve >we're staying at my uncle and aunts house , ours was being fumigated 50 KB JPG >I know l've been a p------------ all year so I just f------ knew Santa was gonna give me coal >get an idea >'ll atay up late and when he tries to give me coal l'll surprise him and just take whatever I want >perfect plan.jpg >so I sneak out of bed at about 10:30 and go down to the living room and hide behind the couch >wind up falling asleep >wake up because I hear a noise >ohfuckitssanta.wav >jump out to apprise that fat f--- >it wasn't Santa >it was my uncle f------ the ever loving s--- out of my mom on the couch. Merry f------ Christmas 9 yr old me.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon gets swindled | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Wedding cucked 08/29/21(Sun)15:39:26 No.24827347 >Be 16 >Get a gf - my first relationship >Now 30 >Still with gf, so suggest getting married >She says yes! >Recently made some dollar on crypto 139 KB JPG >Offer to pay fully for the wedding >"Aww, love you hun, since you're paying let me do all the organising work so you don't have to worry about it" >Cool, transfer all the money to her account so she can get organising >We talk about the organisation asking me if I like certain things, food tastings etc. Standard wedding things >Breaks up with me 1 week before the wedding >Doesn't cancel wedding plans and marries someone else What the f--- can I do? I just paid for someone else's wedding to marry my f------ ex after 14 years ffs, never thought l'd be f------ cucked this bad this hard.
: Anonymous Wedding cucked 08/29/21(Sun)15:39:26 No.24827347 >Be 16 >Get a gf - my first relationship >Now 30 >Still with gf, so suggest getting married >She says yes! >Recently made some dollar on crypto 139 KB JPG >Offer to pay fully for the wedding >"Aww, love you hun, since you're paying let me do all the organising work so you don't have to worry about it" >Cool, transfer all the money to her account so she can get organising >We talk about the organisation asking me if I like certain things, food tastings etc. Standard wedding things >Breaks up with me 1 week before the wedding >Doesn't cancel wedding plans and marries someone else What the f--- can I do? I just paid for someone else's wedding to marry my f------ ex after 14 years ffs, never thought l'd be f------ cucked this bad this hard.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon's "girlfriend" gets a boyfriend | /r/Greentext

You're a good man, charli(...).png L (559 KB, 318x827) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:54:07 No.65172248 v >>65172264 >>65172280 >>651722 >>65172296 >>65172345 >Have spent nearly $2,000 on a girl I met here >Random stuff from anime figures to sex toys >Did this mostly as "gifts" that I told her not to worry about paying me back, though she has sent me a couple of nude pics in return >I thought we were obviously dating, what with the i-love-you's and everything >Today she revealed to me that she's getting back with her ex-boyfriend >l said, "But I thought I was your boyfriend?" >She says, "Anon, you're my best friend in the whole world, I love you, but not like that" >"What about all that s--- l've bought you?" >"That's whatI love most about you, your gifts!" I think this is it. I think this is what l'll kill myself over.
You're a good man, charli(...).png L (559 KB, 318x827) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:54:07 No.65172248 v >>65172264 >>65172280 >>651722 >>65172296 >>65172345 >Have spent nearly $2,000 on a girl I met here >Random stuff from anime figures to sex toys >Did this mostly as "gifts" that I told her not to worry about paying me back, though she has sent me a couple of nude pics in return >I thought we were obviously dating, what with the i-love-you's and everything >Today she revealed to me that she's getting back with her ex-boyfriend >l said, "But I thought I was your boyfriend?" >She says, "Anon, you're my best friend in the whole world, I love you, but not like that" >"What about all that s--- l've bought you?" >"That's whatI love most about you, your gifts!" I think this is it. I think this is what l'll kill myself over.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant font

The Cheese Stands Alone | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:28:30 No.65173417 >wake up >try to fart >s--- the bed I F------ HATE LACTOSE INTOLERANCE I WISH I WAS DEAD 37 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)23:28:30 No.65173417 >wake up >try to fart >s--- the bed I F------ HATE LACTOSE INTOLERANCE I WISH I WAS DEAD 37 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext product font

The Secret to Chadhood | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)17:30:19 No.2403215 Luchadores >get paid for training all day and beating other guys >fights are actually scripted and you act the fighting, low risk of being beaten up like in LUCHA LIBRE mma >get famous and get hundreds of latinas >why haven't you taken the luchapill yet? 25 KB JPG
: Anonymous 08/28/21(Sat)17:30:19 No.2403215 Luchadores >get paid for training all day and beating other guys >fights are actually scripted and you act the fighting, low risk of being beaten up like in LUCHA LIBRE mma >get famous and get hundreds of latinas >why haven't you taken the luchapill yet? 25 KB JPG

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext terrestrial plant line font

anon gets a haircut | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/27/21(Fri)19:55:12 No.65157281 >finally muster the courage to get a haircut >lady cutting my hair was young girl my age with the whole indie look and her booba out with no bra 148 KB JPG >spend whole time full of anxiety trying to avoid her eyes and not look at her booba which were eye level f---, why do women dress like this. I felt like a moron the whole time . Like of course she was was cutting my hair so she saw my eyes flying all over the place trying no to look at her. Any similar experiences?
: Anonymous 08/27/21(Fri)19:55:12 No.65157281 >finally muster the courage to get a haircut >lady cutting my hair was young girl my age with the whole indie look and her booba out with no bra 148 KB JPG >spend whole time full of anxiety trying to avoid her eyes and not look at her booba which were eye level f---, why do women dress like this. I felt like a moron the whole time . Like of course she was was cutting my hair so she saw my eyes flying all over the place trying no to look at her. Any similar experiences?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext smile happy font

Anon makes a recommendation | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: rGdK4W5c ) 08/29/21(Sun)05:25:29 No.336671569 >be me, 26 >try noporn several times >fail every time after 3-21 days because it makes me feel like absolute s--- (anxiety, depression, limp d---, fatigue) >nopornisajudenmeme.bmp >fail to realize it is just withdrawal CLICK 312 KB JPG symptoms caused by years of bathing my brain in dopamine >try again and decide to push through this time >fail >try again >fail again >letsdothis.sat >1 month passes >withdrawal symptoms getting better >2 months in >social anxiety and depression GONE >better posture >better breath >yes read that again, BETTER BREATH >look people in the eyes while i talk with them >able to study longer and more efficiently >more confidence >able to lift more >desire to read increases >laugh about things that i usually don't find funny, more humorous in general >rock hard erections >girls start noticing me >automatically sorting myself out Jordan Peterson style without even actively trying >etc. etc. p--- is killing you anons, anyone who disagrees is a shill and/or a juden. Give NoPorn a try. 32 Replies / 9 Images View Thread
: Anonymous (ID: rGdK4W5c ) 08/29/21(Sun)05:25:29 No.336671569 >be me, 26 >try noporn several times >fail every time after 3-21 days because it makes me feel like absolute s--- (anxiety, depression, limp d---, fatigue) >nopornisajudenmeme.bmp >fail to realize it is just withdrawal CLICK 312 KB JPG symptoms caused by years of bathing my brain in dopamine >try again and decide to push through this time >fail >try again >fail again >letsdothis.sat >1 month passes >withdrawal symptoms getting better >2 months in >social anxiety and depression GONE >better posture >better breath >yes read that again, BETTER BREATH >look people in the eyes while i talk with them >able to study longer and more efficiently >more confidence >able to lift more >desire to read increases >laugh about things that i usually don't find funny, more humorous in general >rock hard erections >girls start noticing me >automatically sorting myself out Jordan Peterson style without even actively trying >etc. etc. p--- is killing you anons, anyone who disagrees is a shill and/or a juden. Give NoPorn a try. 32 Replies / 9 Images View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font material property

Anon is fat | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)07:40:28 No.65174832 >be me >Summer >FattyFatFuck.png >Go out for beer >Extra hot/humid that day >Leave in shame in less than an hour cause I was sweating buckets 31 KB JPG I'm literally stealing away the best years of my life cause I can't stop eating all the time. 2 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)07:40:28 No.65174832 >be me >Summer >FattyFatFuck.png >Go out for beer >Extra hot/humid that day >Leave in shame in less than an hour cause I was sweating buckets 31 KB JPG I'm literally stealing away the best years of my life cause I can't stop eating all the time. 2 Replies View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon thinking of moving to usa | /r/Greentext

O N 36% O1 8:50 4G K/s Is moving to.. 四 ロ: Is moving to America a financially sound decision? No.248254776 hours ago PEPE (12).jpg JPG 8.7 KİB 245x206 >be southern europoor >met white west coast american girl online >decided to travel France and Spain together for 2 weeks >she tells me to come to America to live with her and eventually get married >l actually like very much >Both in our mid 20's She really sold me on the American dream lads. >She makes 9OK in the military >Her sister makes 170k as a chemist at some medical weed extraction plant >170k in Europe is not even an option >90k is extremely rare Meanwhile my Europoor ass is barely earning 10k as a PhD student in STEM. I have 0 debt, 30k cash, 2k stocks, 3k crypto and a bachelor's degree in STEM from a good British University. Do I drop out of the PhD to go to America? 20 replies No.24825478 6 hours ago No f--- that bitch. Tell her the importance of yor comitments and tell her you cant leave. 1 reply No 24825470 6 houre agn
O N 36% O1 8:50 4G K/s Is moving to.. 四 ロ: Is moving to America a financially sound decision? No.248254776 hours ago PEPE (12).jpg JPG 8.7 KİB 245x206 >be southern europoor >met white west coast american girl online >decided to travel France and Spain together for 2 weeks >she tells me to come to America to live with her and eventually get married >l actually like very much >Both in our mid 20's She really sold me on the American dream lads. >She makes 9OK in the military >Her sister makes 170k as a chemist at some medical weed extraction plant >170k in Europe is not even an option >90k is extremely rare Meanwhile my Europoor ass is barely earning 10k as a PhD student in STEM. I have 0 debt, 30k cash, 2k stocks, 3k crypto and a bachelor's degree in STEM from a good British University. Do I drop out of the PhD to go to America? 20 replies No.24825478 6 hours ago No f--- that bitch. Tell her the importance of yor comitments and tell her you cant leave. 1 reply No 24825470 6 houre agn

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon gets a massage | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)09:35:08 No.65174184 Went for massage yesterday lids, anyone who's ever been for one should relate >be in spa resort >robes, slippers, complimentary drinks etc >have full body massage booked >meet masseuse >3/10 little fat gremlin >oh well my eyes will be closed it's fine >get on the table, starkers under a towel >she starts rubbing my back and shoulders >all relaxed by now, thoughts drift to all the massage p--- ive watched >wishing by now this 6/10's hands will wander where they shouldnt >thinking only of bending that sexy 8/10 over this table and f------ her brains out >massage ends after 40 mins >get up and say our goodbyes >violently masturbate in the showers over this 10/10 qt3.14
: Anonymous 08/29/21(Sun)09:35:08 No.65174184 Went for massage yesterday lids, anyone who's ever been for one should relate >be in spa resort >robes, slippers, complimentary drinks etc >have full body massage booked >meet masseuse >3/10 little fat gremlin >oh well my eyes will be closed it's fine >get on the table, starkers under a towel >she starts rubbing my back and shoulders >all relaxed by now, thoughts drift to all the massage p--- ive watched >wishing by now this 6/10's hands will wander where they shouldnt >thinking only of bending that sexy 8/10 over this table and f------ her brains out >massage ends after 40 mins >get up and say our goodbyes >violently masturbate in the showers over this 10/10 qt3.14

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

Anon is going places. He will be making a jump suit from dead hookers’ skin by age 18 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: V+cdTMB1) 11/11/14(Tue)05:49:31 No.578820617 File: Screen Shot 2014-11-11 at(.).png (179 KB, 310x294) greentxt time > be me at age 8 > always hung out around woods by playground where i grew up > thought i was too cool for the playground > one day decide to "booby-trap" the playground's sandbox BA > dig 3' diameter hole to bottom of sand > gather epic trap supplies from woods > lay near perfectly-spaced grid of long, thin sticks on top of hole > weave giant fern leaves on top of sticks > delicately cover with sand again > mymasterpiece.jpg > hang out on swing, waiting for victims > get impatient and go home > go to playground next day > group of mom's circling my now broken trap > one of their young has fallen in. victory is mine > hear them say "a child couldn't have done this" > "must have been some loser teenagers" > realize i'm a god damn evil genius at the age of 8 > mfw
Anonymous (ID: V+cdTMB1) 11/11/14(Tue)05:49:31 No.578820617 File: Screen Shot 2014-11-11 at(.).png (179 KB, 310x294) greentxt time > be me at age 8 > always hung out around woods by playground where i grew up > thought i was too cool for the playground > one day decide to "booby-trap" the playground's sandbox BA > dig 3' diameter hole to bottom of sand > gather epic trap supplies from woods > lay near perfectly-spaced grid of long, thin sticks on top of hole > weave giant fern leaves on top of sticks > delicately cover with sand again > mymasterpiece.jpg > hang out on swing, waiting for victims > get impatient and go home > go to playground next day > group of mom's circling my now broken trap > one of their young has fallen in. victory is mine > hear them say "a child couldn't have done this" > "must have been some loser teenagers" > realize i'm a god damn evil genius at the age of 8 > mfw

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext sleeve

Anon hits a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/17/18(Sat)18:17:01 No.49343343 >3rd grade >grew up with dad, had an absentee mom >Told me to hit people back if they hit me first, didn't tell me it doesn't here we go apply to girls >in class, a roastie talks s--- to me 34 KB JPG for no reason >politely told her to stop, kept talking s---. >she eventually shoves me >whothefuckisthisbitch >slam one on her face >flies across the room, knocked unconscious with her skull cracked and starting to bleed >class runs away in fear of me >principal comes down >screams at me and calls the cops >got fired later that day >f---
: Anonymous 11/17/18(Sat)18:17:01 No.49343343 >3rd grade >grew up with dad, had an absentee mom >Told me to hit people back if they hit me first, didn't tell me it doesn't here we go apply to girls >in class, a roastie talks s--- to me 34 KB JPG for no reason >politely told her to stop, kept talking s---. >she eventually shoves me >whothefuckisthisbitch >slam one on her face >flies across the room, knocked unconscious with her skull cracked and starting to bleed >class runs away in fear of me >principal comes down >screams at me and calls the cops >got fired later that day >f---

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext font

suspicious circumstances | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/26/21(Thu)20:39:33 No.155481485 file.png 1.04 MB PNG >peter Parker turns evil >suddenly says "shalom" when answering the phone Unironically for real no bullshitting actual question legitimately what the absolute f--- did Raimi mean by this?
: Anonymous 08/26/21(Thu)20:39:33 No.155481485 file.png 1.04 MB PNG >peter Parker turns evil >suddenly says "shalom" when answering the phone Unironically for real no bullshitting actual question legitimately what the absolute f--- did Raimi mean by this?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext forehead chin eyebrow smile jaw organism happy font screenshot