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Anon is a fan of skibidi toilet | /r/Greentext

Chud Just now No4040116 File (hide): 1689956294584.png (32.94 KB, 600x800, 7547363267883.png) ImgOps >Made by whites (no ESL elsagate slop) >No globohomo brainwashing >Cameramen use clever engineering and strategy while toilets just launch masses at you (metaphor for coming race war) >RuZZian artist Skibidi toilet is the most a---- thing a gen alpha kid can watch right now.
Chud Just now No4040116 File (hide): 1689956294584.png (32.94 KB, 600x800, 7547363267883.png) ImgOps >Made by whites (no ESL elsagate slop) >No globohomo brainwashing >Cameramen use clever engineering and strategy while toilets just launch masses at you (metaphor for coming race war) >RuZZian artist Skibidi toilet is the most a---- thing a gen alpha kid can watch right now.

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The crow war screencap

GI Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:57:13 UTC-5 No.520558752 ! So /b/ I've been having fun over the past few weeks and figured I'd share. File: 1386662233025.jpg-(11 KB, 247x204, crow.jpg) > Where I work there are thousands of crows that show up every single night. > They hang around for like 4 hours at night, then take off, and show up the next night. > Was reading up on crows because f--- it, interested. > Apparently they're smart as s---. > They recognize faces, and can form preferences in people depending on how they're treated. > A wild idea appears. > I start trying to piss off this group of crows that hang out in the trees near work. > I throw rocks at them, and shake the tree and chase them whenever I can. > Meanwhile, the grass crows across the street, just chill by the mcdicks. > Every time I go to mcd's, I get extra large fries, and feed the grass crows. > They start to like me, while the tree crows hate my s---. > Tree crows throw nuts and try to s--- on me all the time (i dodge bird s--- like I dodge wrenches now) > Grass crows still super bros, and now try to follow me when I walk into mcd's. > I keep this up for a few more weeks, and I'm noticing a bigger divide in the crows. > Grass crows now follow me across the road to make sure I get back to work safe. > Tree crows getting more aggressive and sit on my building and wait for me to walk out. > I've created a great war between two formerly friendly nations. > World War Crow commences. > I am fueling it with french fries. Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:58:03 UTC-5 No.520558845 > Both nations now jockeying for position near my work. > Grass crows try to defend me as the Tree crows fly over me and throw nuts and rocks at me. Replies: >>520559326 > After a few days of tense defense/offense, all goes calm. > I expect the usual squawking and flapping as I walk out, but there's nothing. > I walk out from the covered entry way and look up. > All across the trees surrounding my building are crows. More than there have ever been before. >I recognize one of the grass bros in the tree closest to me. (Called him Reggie. Always gave him the warm fries) > I hear one squawk as one of the tree bros flies out and drops a rock on my shoulder. > All hell breaks loose. > Crows flying all across the sky, and I can hardly see through the clown. > No wonder they call it a murder (huehue) Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:59:05 UTC-5 No.520558960 ! > I sit and watch as literally 1000-2000 crows charge at each other. > Bloodied bird carcasses falling left and right. > Sit in awe of what I've created. > Nearly an hour passes and the cloud thins. > Only grassbros left. > Reggie flies down to the ground and lands beside me. > Has big scar across left eye. Gives no f----. >I stand, and all the grassbros look up to me. > I march across the street, and into mcd's, leaving the door open for all the crows to follow. > Cashiers face. > I order 12 XL french fries, and celebrate my grand victory with the grassbros.
GI Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:57:13 UTC-5 No.520558752 ! So /b/ I've been having fun over the past few weeks and figured I'd share. File: 1386662233025.jpg-(11 KB, 247x204, crow.jpg) > Where I work there are thousands of crows that show up every single night. > They hang around for like 4 hours at night, then take off, and show up the next night. > Was reading up on crows because f--- it, interested. > Apparently they're smart as s---. > They recognize faces, and can form preferences in people depending on how they're treated. > A wild idea appears. > I start trying to piss off this group of crows that hang out in the trees near work. > I throw rocks at them, and shake the tree and chase them whenever I can. > Meanwhile, the grass crows across the street, just chill by the mcdicks. > Every time I go to mcd's, I get extra large fries, and feed the grass crows. > They start to like me, while the tree crows hate my s---. > Tree crows throw nuts and try to s--- on me all the time (i dodge bird s--- like I dodge wrenches now) > Grass crows still super bros, and now try to follow me when I walk into mcd's. > I keep this up for a few more weeks, and I'm noticing a bigger divide in the crows. > Grass crows now follow me across the road to make sure I get back to work safe. > Tree crows getting more aggressive and sit on my building and wait for me to walk out. > I've created a great war between two formerly friendly nations. > World War Crow commences. > I am fueling it with french fries. Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:58:03 UTC-5 No.520558845 > Both nations now jockeying for position near my work. > Grass crows try to defend me as the Tree crows fly over me and throw nuts and rocks at me. Replies: >>520559326 > After a few days of tense defense/offense, all goes calm. > I expect the usual squawking and flapping as I walk out, but there's nothing. > I walk out from the covered entry way and look up. > All across the trees surrounding my building are crows. More than there have ever been before. >I recognize one of the grass bros in the tree closest to me. (Called him Reggie. Always gave him the warm fries) > I hear one squawk as one of the tree bros flies out and drops a rock on my shoulder. > All hell breaks loose. > Crows flying all across the sky, and I can hardly see through the clown. > No wonder they call it a murder (huehue) Anonymous 12/10/13(Tue)02:59:05 UTC-5 No.520558960 ! > I sit and watch as literally 1000-2000 crows charge at each other. > Bloodied bird carcasses falling left and right. > Sit in awe of what I've created. > Nearly an hour passes and the cloud thins. > Only grassbros left. > Reggie flies down to the ground and lands beside me. > Has big scar across left eye. Gives no f----. >I stand, and all the grassbros look up to me. > I march across the street, and into mcd's, leaving the door open for all the crows to follow. > Cashiers face. > I order 12 XL french fries, and celebrate my grand victory with the grassbros.

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Anon takes down a terrorist | /r/Greentext

File: enough.jpg (469 KB, 935x644) That's enough David! >he doesn't do anything violent with them >s--- we need to get bigger >agents sell him an AK-47 >he doesn't do anything >why won't he do anything >we get bigger >agents sell him grenades >he doesn't do anything >f--- it >send in the boys >bust down his door >he pulls out a hand gun >shoots two of our officers I'm such a good agent Anonymous 07/18/23(Tue)02:11:36 No.74070250 >be me >be high ranking official in the FBI >one of my agents hears of a teenager using slurs during a school fight he didn't start >we have 5 agents checking his social media >banned from Reddit for disagreeing about trans in sports >frequents the forbidden frog sight which shall not be named >more extremist views like mass immigration is bad >send in undercover agents >agents sell him illegal handguns >he buys them >the remaining officer retreats to the barricade >the terrorist comes out and fires off an automatic weapon >he kills another nine officers before he is downed >we investigate his house >he had many illegal weapons including grenades and the AK-47 which he used against us >I knew he was a criminal >get promoted for taking down the extremist >>74070291
File: enough.jpg (469 KB, 935x644) That's enough David! >he doesn't do anything violent with them >s--- we need to get bigger >agents sell him an AK-47 >he doesn't do anything >why won't he do anything >we get bigger >agents sell him grenades >he doesn't do anything >f--- it >send in the boys >bust down his door >he pulls out a hand gun >shoots two of our officers I'm such a good agent Anonymous 07/18/23(Tue)02:11:36 No.74070250 >be me >be high ranking official in the FBI >one of my agents hears of a teenager using slurs during a school fight he didn't start >we have 5 agents checking his social media >banned from Reddit for disagreeing about trans in sports >frequents the forbidden frog sight which shall not be named >more extremist views like mass immigration is bad >send in undercover agents >agents sell him illegal handguns >he buys them >the remaining officer retreats to the barricade >the terrorist comes out and fires off an automatic weapon >he kills another nine officers before he is downed >we investigate his house >he had many illegal weapons including grenades and the AK-47 which he used against us >I knew he was a criminal >get promoted for taking down the extremist >>74070291

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Anon sees barbie alone | /r/Greentext

Do not watch Barbie alone! Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:18 No. 187814618 ► >>187814759 >>187814993 >>187815576 >>187815592 >>187815653 >>187815960 >>187816020 >>187816036 >>187816085 >>187816124 >>187816126 >>187816156 >>187816166 >>187816200 >>187816233 >>187816271 >>187816273 >>187816306 >>187816353 >>187816464>>187816718 >>187816726 >>187816770 >>187816937 >>187816951 >>187817272 >>187817390 >>187817551 >>187817876 >>187819108 >>187819111 >>187819284>>187819320 >>187819901 >>187820178 >>187820449 >>187820743 >>187820788 >>187820828 >>187820839 >>187821068 >>187821079 >>187821115 >>187821630 >>187821714>>187821962 >>187822011 >>187822417 >>187822987 >>187824219 >>187824541 >>187825009 >>187825114 >>187826453 >>187826492 >>187826977 >>187827119 >>187827166 Just had the worst cinema experience of my life >Book ticket to see Barbie to see what all the hype is about >No frens so just me, seated in the middle of the theatre, only a few other seats booked far away >Check back on the booking shortly before the movie and almost the entire theatre is booked out >Arrive at the kinoplex, get my popcorn and drink, notice everyone else in the queue is wearing pink, 90% women >panic.jpg >When I enter the cinema everyone is in groups of 4 or more, all wearing matching outfits, pink, sparkly, cowboy hats etc. >I'm wearing a grey hoodie and jeans >Have to squeeze past group of girls to get to my seat, they start giggling and whispering >Accidentally step on one of their feet >Sit down in my seat, immediately the girl next to me swaps seats so her boyfriend is next to me >Couple minutes later the seat on my other side is taken by a couple with children >Hear whispers, giggling, snickering during the entirety of the trailers, can see the girls looking at me >The boyfriend asks me why I'm seeing Barbie alone >Say I'm waiting for my friend to arrive >He doesn't reply, turns to girlfriend and they whisper to eachother >Heart beating fast, start sweating >Father of the family on my other side keeps glaring at me >Decide it's not worth it, get up and leave, squeeze past girls again and hear them laughing as I leave the theatre Do not see this movie alone, that was awful and completely ruined my week. I see every movie alone and I've never had this kind of experience before, probably not going to the cinema again anytime soon
Do not watch Barbie alone! Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:18 No. 187814618 ► >>187814759 >>187814993 >>187815576 >>187815592 >>187815653 >>187815960 >>187816020 >>187816036 >>187816085 >>187816124 >>187816126 >>187816156 >>187816166 >>187816200 >>187816233 >>187816271 >>187816273 >>187816306 >>187816353 >>187816464>>187816718 >>187816726 >>187816770 >>187816937 >>187816951 >>187817272 >>187817390 >>187817551 >>187817876 >>187819108 >>187819111 >>187819284>>187819320 >>187819901 >>187820178 >>187820449 >>187820743 >>187820788 >>187820828 >>187820839 >>187821068 >>187821079 >>187821115 >>187821630 >>187821714>>187821962 >>187822011 >>187822417 >>187822987 >>187824219 >>187824541 >>187825009 >>187825114 >>187826453 >>187826492 >>187826977 >>187827119 >>187827166 Just had the worst cinema experience of my life >Book ticket to see Barbie to see what all the hype is about >No frens so just me, seated in the middle of the theatre, only a few other seats booked far away >Check back on the booking shortly before the movie and almost the entire theatre is booked out >Arrive at the kinoplex, get my popcorn and drink, notice everyone else in the queue is wearing pink, 90% women >panic.jpg >When I enter the cinema everyone is in groups of 4 or more, all wearing matching outfits, pink, sparkly, cowboy hats etc. >I'm wearing a grey hoodie and jeans >Have to squeeze past group of girls to get to my seat, they start giggling and whispering >Accidentally step on one of their feet >Sit down in my seat, immediately the girl next to me swaps seats so her boyfriend is next to me >Couple minutes later the seat on my other side is taken by a couple with children >Hear whispers, giggling, snickering during the entirety of the trailers, can see the girls looking at me >The boyfriend asks me why I'm seeing Barbie alone >Say I'm waiting for my friend to arrive >He doesn't reply, turns to girlfriend and they whisper to eachother >Heart beating fast, start sweating >Father of the family on my other side keeps glaring at me >Decide it's not worth it, get up and leave, squeeze past girls again and hear them laughing as I leave the theatre Do not see this movie alone, that was awful and completely ruined my week. I see every movie alone and I've never had this kind of experience before, probably not going to the cinema again anytime soon

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Anon builds a coop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous yeah nah you're a c--- 24 KB JPG >>4563436 # 07/06/23(Thu)13:41:50 No.4562399 >Build coop >Chickens don't go in and just chill in the run >Build roosts >Chickens refuse to use them and just sleep on the floor Just thankless work
: Anonymous yeah nah you're a c--- 24 KB JPG >>4563436 # 07/06/23(Thu)13:41:50 No.4562399 >Build coop >Chickens don't go in and just chill in the run >Build roosts >Chickens refuse to use them and just sleep on the floor Just thankless work

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Anon takes a shit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/19/19(Thu)10:31:39 No.54480871 >be in public bathroom >it's empty >I can finally take a dump >go to one of the stalls and start cranking a fat s--- out of my ass >turd is 90% out of my a------ before the bathroom door bursts open >I hear punching and grunting >I look under my stall and see 2 pairs of feet >they are beating the s--- out of each other >suddenly hear a mirror shatter and hear one of the guys fall to the ground >bathroom is silent except for heavy breathing >feel my turd disconnecting from the mainland >f--- no f--- no f--- no >turd plops into water >echos >heavy breathing stops 125 KB JPG
: Anonymous 09/19/19(Thu)10:31:39 No.54480871 >be in public bathroom >it's empty >I can finally take a dump >go to one of the stalls and start cranking a fat s--- out of my ass >turd is 90% out of my a------ before the bathroom door bursts open >I hear punching and grunting >I look under my stall and see 2 pairs of feet >they are beating the s--- out of each other >suddenly hear a mirror shatter and hear one of the guys fall to the ground >bathroom is silent except for heavy breathing >feel my turd disconnecting from the mainland >f--- no f--- no f--- no >turd plops into water >echos >heavy breathing stops 125 KB JPG

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It be like that | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 266 KB JPG 4 Replies Anonymous >no inheritance bonus points 07/21/23(Fri)09:48:32 No.74105776 Anonymous >have never had own room as a kid >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent >have to share a rented room with people I don't know >mfw will never experience having personal space >have never had own room as a kid check >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent check >have to share a rented room with people I don't know check >mfw will never experience having personal space check >>74106026 # View Thread 07/21/23(Fri)10:03:02 No.74105877 07/21/23(Fri)10:16:52 No.74105965 Be sure to thank the world economic forum for what they have blessed you with.
Anonymous 266 KB JPG 4 Replies Anonymous >no inheritance bonus points 07/21/23(Fri)09:48:32 No.74105776 Anonymous >have never had own room as a kid >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent >have to share a rented room with people I don't know >mfw will never experience having personal space >have never had own room as a kid check >grew up to live in the age when almost no one can afford a rent check >have to share a rented room with people I don't know check >mfw will never experience having personal space check >>74106026 # View Thread 07/21/23(Fri)10:03:02 No.74105877 07/21/23(Fri)10:16:52 No.74105965 Be sure to thank the world economic forum for what they have blessed you with.

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Anon is a gaybo | /r/Greentext

: Sage Am I aromantic? I have never been attracted to a woman romantically. I've never imagine myself with a woman going to a park and have a fun time. Romance in general seems totally ubiquitous to me. I am only interested in raw animalistic sex tbqh. I cringe every time someone says that f------ a girl without getting romantically attracted to her is unfulfilling. I am a virgin but I think having sex with hookers is 100% hotter than cuddling with a cute girl. 197 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)20:37:30 No.74101485 7 Replies View Thread
: Sage Am I aromantic? I have never been attracted to a woman romantically. I've never imagine myself with a woman going to a park and have a fun time. Romance in general seems totally ubiquitous to me. I am only interested in raw animalistic sex tbqh. I cringe every time someone says that f------ a girl without getting romantically attracted to her is unfulfilling. I am a virgin but I think having sex with hookers is 100% hotter than cuddling with a cute girl. 197 KB JPG 07/20/23(Thu)20:37:30 No.74101485 7 Replies View Thread

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Anon know an Iranian | /r/Greentext

1h (5/28 15:38) 63880930 5 Re 2 Img JPG 45KB (680 × 760) 4 Replies . GENDER REVEAL >have an Iranian online friend >he is secretly an atheist and basically a liberal >I tell him everything about western women >he changes his mind and becomes a muslim again Umm, based?
1h (5/28 15:38) 63880930 5 Re 2 Img JPG 45KB (680 × 760) 4 Replies . GENDER REVEAL >have an Iranian online friend >he is secretly an atheist and basically a liberal >I tell him everything about western women >he changes his mind and becomes a muslim again Umm, based?

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Anon shits his britches | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri) 13:33:44 No.902994122 8 KB JPG >Be me >5 months ago in class >Stomach upset from s----- state- funded school "lunch" > Take a chance on a fart > End up loudly and wetly s------- myself in Calculus class >So loud that people in the hallway heard and are laughing > Bubbling s--- leaks from the top of my jeans so I try to shove it in with no luck >Liquid feces all over my chair so I try to pick it up and scoop it back in my s----- pants >Coughing and gagging with tears in my eyes >Realize everyone including the teacher is staring at me >Run out crying but leave a s----- trail of dump to the bathroom >Wash my s----- pants out in the sink to no avail >There's liquid s--- all over the bathroom > Just f------ walk out I got f------ suspended for the remainder of the year. Kids got videos on snapchat and the whole school calls me Captain S----shake. I might genuinely kill myself over this. The rest of my life is completely f----- and I can't recover from this man what the f---
Anonymous 07/21/23(Fri) 13:33:44 No.902994122 8 KB JPG >Be me >5 months ago in class >Stomach upset from s----- state- funded school "lunch" > Take a chance on a fart > End up loudly and wetly s------- myself in Calculus class >So loud that people in the hallway heard and are laughing > Bubbling s--- leaks from the top of my jeans so I try to shove it in with no luck >Liquid feces all over my chair so I try to pick it up and scoop it back in my s----- pants >Coughing and gagging with tears in my eyes >Realize everyone including the teacher is staring at me >Run out crying but leave a s----- trail of dump to the bathroom >Wash my s----- pants out in the sink to no avail >There's liquid s--- all over the bathroom > Just f------ walk out I got f------ suspended for the remainder of the year. Kids got videos on snapchat and the whole school calls me Captain S----shake. I might genuinely kill myself over this. The rest of my life is completely f----- and I can't recover from this man what the f---

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Anon eats some Scooby Snacks | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Nel SCOOBY-DON GRAHAM CRACKER SNACKS CINNAMON SLODEV. SORBY WASTN NET WT1 02 2 07/21/23(Fri)12:28:15 No.74107163 ZomboMeme 1741.jpg 67 KB JPG >Be me, school f-- >Fat f--- that cant wait for lunch >Start eating some Scooby snack crackers >Some asian kid sees me "Ha, youre eating dog food?" "F--- you, you eat dogs" >The skinny s--- runs to tell the teacher >Get sent to principals office Fml >Get chewed out "This is a bully free zone, blah blah blah, racism will not be tolerated, blah blah blah" >Zone out for a bit and wonder about lunch >Principal notices "Are you listening?!" "Yes" "What was the last thing I said?" >F---, start panicking "You asked if I was listening" Principal calls my home. Dad just laughs at me but my mom shakes her head in disappointment
: Anonymous Nel SCOOBY-DON GRAHAM CRACKER SNACKS CINNAMON SLODEV. SORBY WASTN NET WT1 02 2 07/21/23(Fri)12:28:15 No.74107163 ZomboMeme 1741.jpg 67 KB JPG >Be me, school f-- >Fat f--- that cant wait for lunch >Start eating some Scooby snack crackers >Some asian kid sees me "Ha, youre eating dog food?" "F--- you, you eat dogs" >The skinny s--- runs to tell the teacher >Get sent to principals office Fml >Get chewed out "This is a bully free zone, blah blah blah, racism will not be tolerated, blah blah blah" >Zone out for a bit and wonder about lunch >Principal notices "Are you listening?!" "Yes" "What was the last thing I said?" >F---, start panicking "You asked if I was listening" Principal calls my home. Dad just laughs at me but my mom shakes her head in disappointment

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Aron dont know what to do at UNI | /r/Greentext

File: 1397837437585.jpg-(44 KB, 421x834, 21f.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 8rz7iHpQ) 04/18/14(Fri) 19:10:37 UTC+3 No.542805150 [Reply] >Be me >At University (college for you amerifags) >Boring as f--- lecture, and my stomach is churning because I was out drinking last night >Chance a fart >Doesn't make any noise but suddenly I feel something down there >shatmypants.jpg >oh f--- >Pants filled with semi-liquid s---, cant risk leaving to clean up >People start to smell it and are turning and looking in my direction >I figure f--- it I'm not sitting with my pants full of s---- >Get up slowly and waddle carefully towards the doors >Literally 1 metre from the door and I feel something roll down my leg >Look behind me, see a p------------ on the floor, people are pointing and whispering >Freeze like a rabbit in the headlights >What the f--- am I supposed to do? Leave it there? Play it off? Pretend it's not mine? Take it with me? >For some reason I decide the best course of action is to pretend to faint >Fall over badly, shoulder lands on the s--- >Roll over to get out of s--- >Realise how fake this looks so I start twitching >Really badly faked seizure, nobody gets up to help, everyone just staring at me rolling around on the floor in my own s--- >No one buying it >Get up and walk out Have to see these people every day.
File: 1397837437585.jpg-(44 KB, 421x834, 21f.jpg) Anonymous (ID: 8rz7iHpQ) 04/18/14(Fri) 19:10:37 UTC+3 No.542805150 [Reply] >Be me >At University (college for you amerifags) >Boring as f--- lecture, and my stomach is churning because I was out drinking last night >Chance a fart >Doesn't make any noise but suddenly I feel something down there >shatmypants.jpg >oh f--- >Pants filled with semi-liquid s---, cant risk leaving to clean up >People start to smell it and are turning and looking in my direction >I figure f--- it I'm not sitting with my pants full of s---- >Get up slowly and waddle carefully towards the doors >Literally 1 metre from the door and I feel something roll down my leg >Look behind me, see a p------------ on the floor, people are pointing and whispering >Freeze like a rabbit in the headlights >What the f--- am I supposed to do? Leave it there? Play it off? Pretend it's not mine? Take it with me? >For some reason I decide the best course of action is to pretend to faint >Fall over badly, shoulder lands on the s--- >Roll over to get out of s--- >Realise how fake this looks so I start twitching >Really badly faked seizure, nobody gets up to help, everyone just staring at me rolling around on the floor in my own s--- >No one buying it >Get up and walk out Have to see these people every day.

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Anon's parents thought he's gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/03/23(Mon)21:50:01 No.73888947 1688392153604.jpg 76 KB JPG >tell parents I'm heterosexual >they've been crying for an hour thinking I'm gay how educated are your parents
: Anonymous 07/03/23(Mon)21:50:01 No.73888947 1688392153604.jpg 76 KB JPG >tell parents I'm heterosexual >they've been crying for an hour thinking I'm gay how educated are your parents

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anon gets blocked... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 33 KB JPG 07/16/23(Sun)22:23:08 No.29372061 >message female friend that lives overseas once in like, 6-12 months usually response to her story or whatever >pretty clear that she doesn't really want anything to do with me anymore, which is fine and I'm cool with people move on >one day she just blocks me Ultimately it doesn't really affect my life but it still kinda feels bad that she felt uncomfortable enough to block me like that.
: Anonymous 33 KB JPG 07/16/23(Sun)22:23:08 No.29372061 >message female friend that lives overseas once in like, 6-12 months usually response to her story or whatever >pretty clear that she doesn't really want anything to do with me anymore, which is fine and I'm cool with people move on >one day she just blocks me Ultimately it doesn't really affect my life but it still kinda feels bad that she felt uncomfortable enough to block me like that.

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)07:06:56 No.34199147 flat,800x800,075,f.jpg 71 KB JPG >go to a camping trip by yourself in the woods >spend the night there >days later casually check your phone >there are pictures of you sleeping in your sleep bag What gives
: Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)07:06:56 No.34199147 flat,800x800,075,f.jpg 71 KB JPG >go to a camping trip by yourself in the woods >spend the night there >days later casually check your phone >there are pictures of you sleeping in your sleep bag What gives

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Aron is a prmavirgin | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 97 KB JPG 01/16/22(Sun)02:29:10 No.67007794 >be 20 y/o permavirgin >horny 24/7 >no attention from girls >get desperate thinking im gonna die a virgin >might aswell go full h--- >start to hit on this discord femboy >we actually get along >ffw 4 months >we now do erp where he is the bottom and im the top pretty much daily >actually gets me horny like crazy >ask him if he wants to come to my place >he says yes >shows up in one of those anime sundresses >rocksolid.png >we do a little chat and then ask him if he wants to do it >he says yes and starts to undress >seeing his petite body makes me go full a------ >pin him down and the rest is history >ffw 3 weeks >he moved in with me calls me darling, pretends to be my wife, cooks do the dishes etc. >mfw I actually got wife now
Anonymous 97 KB JPG 01/16/22(Sun)02:29:10 No.67007794 >be 20 y/o permavirgin >horny 24/7 >no attention from girls >get desperate thinking im gonna die a virgin >might aswell go full h--- >start to hit on this discord femboy >we actually get along >ffw 4 months >we now do erp where he is the bottom and im the top pretty much daily >actually gets me horny like crazy >ask him if he wants to come to my place >he says yes >shows up in one of those anime sundresses >rocksolid.png >we do a little chat and then ask him if he wants to do it >he says yes and starts to undress >seeing his petite body makes me go full a------ >pin him down and the rest is history >ffw 3 weeks >he moved in with me calls me darling, pretends to be my wife, cooks do the dishes etc. >mfw I actually got wife now

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Women even can't understand simply language | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/14/23(Sat)21:41:13 No.63265334 >Talking to a therapist, she asks me about my sexual history >Tell her I'm a virgin still at 28 >"Oh, so you're asexual?" >"No, I'm not, I want to have sex I just haven't." >"What do you mean?" >"What do you mean what do I mean?" >"You can't tell me you've honestly been trying this long and are still a virgin?" >mfw 55 KB JPG I didn't know what to f------ say to that and she changed the subject. Therapy is f------ useless.
Anonymous 07/14/23(Sat)21:41:13 No.63265334 >Talking to a therapist, she asks me about my sexual history >Tell her I'm a virgin still at 28 >"Oh, so you're asexual?" >"No, I'm not, I want to have sex I just haven't." >"What do you mean?" >"What do you mean what do I mean?" >"You can't tell me you've honestly been trying this long and are still a virgin?" >mfw 55 KB JPG I didn't know what to f------ say to that and she changed the subject. Therapy is f------ useless.

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Hand of Cthulhu | /r/Greentext

dqv7qdxijg341.jpg 77 KB JPG How would history change if there was a giant disembodied hand that zooms around the planet and crushes one random person with its index finger every day? It's called The Hand and it's always slightly faster than you.
dqv7qdxijg341.jpg 77 KB JPG How would history change if there was a giant disembodied hand that zooms around the planet and crushes one random person with its index finger every day? It's called The Hand and it's always slightly faster than you.

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Anon dates a tranny | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Found out my girlfriend used t(...) 23 KB JPG f----- dating a troon. : Anonymous : Anonymous Why are you dating an apple? 07/21/23(Fri)09:50:44 No.902974809 My gf recently told me she was born male and I honestly feel confused and angry. We've been together for over 4 years. She told me she had the surgery before we ever met and I feel disgusted. The love of my life, the mother of my child, the apple of my eye, a f------ t-----. Should I dump her? I don't want to be a >t----- >mother of kids >kids are poo and pee : Anonymous 30 KB PNG Gae 07/21/23(Fri)09:55:19 No.902974944 : Anonymous >>902974809 (OP) # 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:57 No.902975084 07/21/23(Fri)10:48:45 No.902976331 >>902974809 (OP) # >>mother of my child dumb dumb 07/21/23(Fri) 10:49:45 No.902976350
: Anonymous Found out my girlfriend used t(...) 23 KB JPG f----- dating a troon. : Anonymous : Anonymous Why are you dating an apple? 07/21/23(Fri)09:50:44 No.902974809 My gf recently told me she was born male and I honestly feel confused and angry. We've been together for over 4 years. She told me she had the surgery before we ever met and I feel disgusted. The love of my life, the mother of my child, the apple of my eye, a f------ t-----. Should I dump her? I don't want to be a >t----- >mother of kids >kids are poo and pee : Anonymous 30 KB PNG Gae 07/21/23(Fri)09:55:19 No.902974944 : Anonymous >>902974809 (OP) # 07/21/23(Fri)10:00:57 No.902975084 07/21/23(Fri)10:48:45 No.902976331 >>902974809 (OP) # >>mother of my child dumb dumb 07/21/23(Fri) 10:49:45 No.902976350

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Rescue vehicle | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 46 KB PNG 03/21/21(Sun)22:06:45 No.62856647 >>62849459 (OP) # >Be me >17 >Have younger sister, 13 at the time >Parents going out for the night >Take sister out to a movie cause bored >Popcorn, soda, the works. Some capeshit movie. >Have a fun night, she gives me a hug and says thanks after >Feelsgoodman Probably would have roped years ago if not for my family
: Anonymous 46 KB PNG 03/21/21(Sun)22:06:45 No.62856647 >>62849459 (OP) # >Be me >17 >Have younger sister, 13 at the time >Parents going out for the night >Take sister out to a movie cause bored >Popcorn, soda, the works. Some capeshit movie. >Have a fun night, she gives me a hug and says thanks after >Feelsgoodman Probably would have roped years ago if not for my family

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