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Anon is Alpha as fuck | /r/Greentext

File: 1474885625692.jpg (39 KB, 509x619) times where you have almost made it Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)11:23:00 No.40643882 [Reply] >>40644281 >>40644891 >>40643911 >>40643931 >>40643932 >>40643942 >>40643946 >>40644094 >>40644105 >>40644114 >>40644126 >>40644145 I am considering to renovate my apartment just to distract me from being myself /fit/ >visiting female friend I have known for many years >do friend stuff, nothing fancy >plan was that I stay the night if it gets too late >oh boy I have prepared myself so long for this >clean shaven, got my best cologne out and even bought a nice new tracksuit to hang around at her place (we are long past gone the point where we pretend to not be hobo-tier while being at home) >at night >we go to sleep and browse s--- on our phones >could clearly see her miring when I got out of the shower before bed >I have lifted so long for this very moment >decide to be bold it's now or never >"hey wanna have sex?" >ALPHA AS F--- this is my new me >she puts phone down and smirks "uhm haha what? I mean yea sure why not" >stare at her for 5 seconds >bros you can't imagine how long 5 seconds can be >autism spike >look at her and say "yea well I didn't expect that answer" >silence >she looks at me for a few seconds clearly expecting me to make a move >she eventually rolls over with her back to me and gets back on her phone >don't talk or even mention it next morning Hold me, /fit/. Please hold me and tell me everything is going to be alright
File: 1474885625692.jpg (39 KB, 509x619) times where you have almost made it Anonymous 03/09/17(Thu)11:23:00 No.40643882 [Reply] >>40644281 >>40644891 >>40643911 >>40643931 >>40643932 >>40643942 >>40643946 >>40644094 >>40644105 >>40644114 >>40644126 >>40644145 I am considering to renovate my apartment just to distract me from being myself /fit/ >visiting female friend I have known for many years >do friend stuff, nothing fancy >plan was that I stay the night if it gets too late >oh boy I have prepared myself so long for this >clean shaven, got my best cologne out and even bought a nice new tracksuit to hang around at her place (we are long past gone the point where we pretend to not be hobo-tier while being at home) >at night >we go to sleep and browse s--- on our phones >could clearly see her miring when I got out of the shower before bed >I have lifted so long for this very moment >decide to be bold it's now or never >"hey wanna have sex?" >ALPHA AS F--- this is my new me >she puts phone down and smirks "uhm haha what? I mean yea sure why not" >stare at her for 5 seconds >bros you can't imagine how long 5 seconds can be >autism spike >look at her and say "yea well I didn't expect that answer" >silence >she looks at me for a few seconds clearly expecting me to make a move >she eventually rolls over with her back to me and gets back on her phone >don't talk or even mention it next morning Hold me, /fit/. Please hold me and tell me everything is going to be alright

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Anon likes to mess around | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 0 128 KB PNG mouths 06/19/22(Sun)16:36:37 No.18003938 >working as waiter >only ever ask "is everything alright" when they have a mouthful of food >all they can do is nod their head awkwardly while covering their >>18004712 # >>18005408 # >>18005746 # >>18006385 # Anonymous06/19/22(Sun)19:58:55 No.18004712 >>18003938 # you are a menace to society 18003952
: Anonymous 0 128 KB PNG mouths 06/19/22(Sun)16:36:37 No.18003938 >working as waiter >only ever ask "is everything alright" when they have a mouthful of food >all they can do is nod their head awkwardly while covering their >>18004712 # >>18005408 # >>18005746 # >>18006385 # Anonymous06/19/22(Sun)19:58:55 No.18004712 >>18003938 # you are a menace to society 18003952

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Anon doesn’t like UK | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: MNUC8ZRw) 260 KB PNG 09/29/21 (Wed)02:27:49 No.341311539 94 KB PNG What the f--- is wrong with people? There is a literal island made of garbage out there in the sea. Anonymous (ID: MNUC8ZRw) 09/29/21 (Wed)02:28:10 No.341311591 oops wrong pic
Anonymous (ID: MNUC8ZRw) 260 KB PNG 09/29/21 (Wed)02:27:49 No.341311539 94 KB PNG What the f--- is wrong with people? There is a literal island made of garbage out there in the sea. Anonymous (ID: MNUC8ZRw) 09/29/21 (Wed)02:28:10 No.341311591 oops wrong pic

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Anon explains attractiveness to a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1 2 3 >be me >texting with girl I met on bumble >go on date and really hit it off >texting next day and I mention that I'm surprised she gave me a chance >she asks why she wouldn't >I have negative canthal tilt and rate around a 4.6 attractiveness while she has good facial structure and probably ranks a 5.8 >explain this to her >she asks "what the f--- is canthal tilt" >also seems upset for some reason >assure her that I'm not being self deprecating I just know that I'm not that attractive >send her pic rel and explain how canthal tilt, sexual dimorphism, and cranial size all determine male attractiveness 4 5 6 7 8 07/27/23(Thu)23:48:34 No.74186071 345 KB JPG >she asks why I'm so obsessed with hot men >"It's just a hobby I guess haha" >she ghosts me soon after I'm pretty sure I convinced her that she could do better. I know I'm rusty but I didn't think I was THAT rusty.
: Anonymous 1 2 3 >be me >texting with girl I met on bumble >go on date and really hit it off >texting next day and I mention that I'm surprised she gave me a chance >she asks why she wouldn't >I have negative canthal tilt and rate around a 4.6 attractiveness while she has good facial structure and probably ranks a 5.8 >explain this to her >she asks "what the f--- is canthal tilt" >also seems upset for some reason >assure her that I'm not being self deprecating I just know that I'm not that attractive >send her pic rel and explain how canthal tilt, sexual dimorphism, and cranial size all determine male attractiveness 4 5 6 7 8 07/27/23(Thu)23:48:34 No.74186071 345 KB JPG >she asks why I'm so obsessed with hot men >"It's just a hobby I guess haha" >she ghosts me soon after I'm pretty sure I convinced her that she could do better. I know I'm rusty but I didn't think I was THAT rusty.

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Female character choices | /r/Greentext

☐damn i hate when games let me pick gender Anonymous 07/27/23(Thu)13:46:52 No.32139902 ► >>32139945 >last year i was straight 17 y/o boy >got a new game for switch >lets me pick gender at start >female looks pretty cute, i choose her >i play the game happily >one guy in the game is really sweet >f--- h <he is super attractive: polite, tragic backstory, completely unhinged >finish the game >last cutscene he confesses his love for me >i keep giggling >"i am straight, i am a man" i keep telling myself >been binging otome games ever since i was f------ ruined by a small choice in one game. can i sue someone?
☐damn i hate when games let me pick gender Anonymous 07/27/23(Thu)13:46:52 No.32139902 ► >>32139945 >last year i was straight 17 y/o boy >got a new game for switch >lets me pick gender at start >female looks pretty cute, i choose her >i play the game happily >one guy in the game is really sweet >f--- h <he is super attractive: polite, tragic backstory, completely unhinged >finish the game >last cutscene he confesses his love for me >i keep giggling >"i am straight, i am a man" i keep telling myself >been binging otome games ever since i was f------ ruined by a small choice in one game. can i sue someone?

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Anon is a christian | /r/Greentext

its insane how beautiful life can be M ■ Anonymous (ID: XUkCxynQ) 06/08/23(Thu)18:16:44 No.429921863 >>429924427 >>429924555 BD4BB1FB-8687-4820-A15C-B(...).jpg (86 KB, 790x960) google yandex iqdb wait The main benefit is that I took control of my own life instead of waiting on god to make everything better or give me a "sign". Once you learn that the Calvary isn't coming, you start to actually live, and appreciate the true blessings in life, and your loved ones. Because now I know that my time with them is limited, and once they're gone, they're gone. Life is more beautiful now than it ever was when I was a theist. If there is a god, then hopefully they forgive me, and maybe they're even proud of me for making the most of their creations.
its insane how beautiful life can be M ■ Anonymous (ID: XUkCxynQ) 06/08/23(Thu)18:16:44 No.429921863 >>429924427 >>429924555 BD4BB1FB-8687-4820-A15C-B(...).jpg (86 KB, 790x960) google yandex iqdb wait The main benefit is that I took control of my own life instead of waiting on god to make everything better or give me a "sign". Once you learn that the Calvary isn't coming, you start to actually live, and appreciate the true blessings in life, and your loved ones. Because now I know that my time with them is limited, and once they're gone, they're gone. Life is more beautiful now than it ever was when I was a theist. If there is a god, then hopefully they forgive me, and maybe they're even proud of me for making the most of their creations.

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A gun made by the French | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10/17/22(Mon) 20:01:00 No.706227 148a.jpg 17 KB JPG >be french >made one gun that shoots 3 bullets at once >mag capacity is not divisible by 3
: Anonymous 10/17/22(Mon) 20:01:00 No.706227 148a.jpg 17 KB JPG >be french >made one gun that shoots 3 bullets at once >mag capacity is not divisible by 3

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Anon wonders what to do in the 9/11 plane. | /r/Greentext

File: 1690479171066.jpg (85 KB, 1024x677) Anonymous (ID: aUjMn/Rg) 07/27/23(Thu)18:33:40 No.435962037 [Reply]► >>435962180 >>435962250 >>435962253 >POV: You're inside 9/11 plane what you do Anonymous (ID: (IBDfn0/8) 07/27/23(Thu)18:34:41 No.435962130 Ever read Berserk? >> Anonymous (ID: an4SQeA2) 07/27/23(Thu)18:35:17 No.435962180 ► >>435962037 (OP) Turn 360° and walk away □ Anonymous (ID: uuBtsqko) 07/27/23 (Thu)18:35:58 No.435962250 >>435962037 (OP) Get life warranty □ Anonymous (ID: YwV3KTcz) 07/27/23 (Thu)18:36:02 No.435962253 ► >>435962037 (OP) I make a call in my cell phone to air on CNN and then put all the terrorist passports in an invincible fireproof box
File: 1690479171066.jpg (85 KB, 1024x677) Anonymous (ID: aUjMn/Rg) 07/27/23(Thu)18:33:40 No.435962037 [Reply]► >>435962180 >>435962250 >>435962253 >POV: You're inside 9/11 plane what you do Anonymous (ID: (IBDfn0/8) 07/27/23(Thu)18:34:41 No.435962130 Ever read Berserk? >> Anonymous (ID: an4SQeA2) 07/27/23(Thu)18:35:17 No.435962180 ► >>435962037 (OP) Turn 360° and walk away □ Anonymous (ID: uuBtsqko) 07/27/23 (Thu)18:35:58 No.435962250 >>435962037 (OP) Get life warranty □ Anonymous (ID: YwV3KTcz) 07/27/23 (Thu)18:36:02 No.435962253 ► >>435962037 (OP) I make a call in my cell phone to air on CNN and then put all the terrorist passports in an invincible fireproof box

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Who the fuck will you main?! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous ljiranaide,%20Nagatoro-san%20-%2003%20-%20Large%2009.jpg 187 KB JPG S4 Don't bully me, Nagatoro fighting game from Arc Sys will come soon! 1vs1 with assists launch roster >Senpai >Nagatoro >Gamo-chan >Yoshi >Sakura 12/19/22(Mon)17:56:38 No.411477876- >Art Club President >Guy A >Guy B >Misaki Nagatoro >>411478083 # Who the f--- will you main?!
: Anonymous ljiranaide,%20Nagatoro-san%20-%2003%20-%20Large%2009.jpg 187 KB JPG S4 Don't bully me, Nagatoro fighting game from Arc Sys will come soon! 1vs1 with assists launch roster >Senpai >Nagatoro >Gamo-chan >Yoshi >Sakura 12/19/22(Mon)17:56:38 No.411477876- >Art Club President >Guy A >Guy B >Misaki Nagatoro >>411478083 # Who the f--- will you main?!

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Anon Thanks to a "APPLE LADY" | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7/14/23(Fri)05:56:06 No.10298738 >be me, walking past local market >pass stand with many different apples >desire to eat apple intensifies >select good-looking apple, approach apple lady to pay >"Just the one? You can just have it." >nice early fall day >walk streets eating free apple >it's super juicy and crunchy to the max, 9.5/10 >Thanks, apple lady
: Anonymous 7/14/23(Fri)05:56:06 No.10298738 >be me, walking past local market >pass stand with many different apples >desire to eat apple intensifies >select good-looking apple, approach apple lady to pay >"Just the one? You can just have it." >nice early fall day >walk streets eating free apple >it's super juicy and crunchy to the max, 9.5/10 >Thanks, apple lady

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Anon Tries Acid | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 135 KB JPG Never again 07/27/23(Thu)15:50:41 No.74180932 >be me >do lsd >all my walls now are faces breathing and morphing >end up drawing faces all around my room
: Anonymous 135 KB JPG Never again 07/27/23(Thu)15:50:41 No.74180932 >be me >do lsd >all my walls now are faces breathing and morphing >end up drawing faces all around my room

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How SpongeBob Saved My Life


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Anon said hi | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/27/23(Thu)18:11:07 No.74181776 7 KB JPG >Walking home from my job >notice a little girl (12-13) ahead looking at me >as i walk past her she nerviously says "hi" >I saw hi to her and she runs away giggling What should one take away from a situation like this? 07/27/23(Thu)18:12:47 No.74181792 Anonymous >>74181776 (OP) # Well obviously she wants the D, go ask her father for her hand in marriage 07/27/23(Thu)18:14:23 No.74181816 Anonymous >>74181776 (OP) # you should be locked away if you think theres anything to be taken away from this >>74182068 # >>74182083 # >>74182258 # >>74182316 # 07/27/23(Thu)18:37:48 No.74182068 : Anonymous >>74181816 # Jesus Christ he's a working man. This is the green text board. He posted shrek for christs sake. He didnt even argue with you after 20 minutes. You really think he's a bad guy? I seriously dont read him as one. You better be baiting s--- poster.
: Anonymous 07/27/23(Thu)18:11:07 No.74181776 7 KB JPG >Walking home from my job >notice a little girl (12-13) ahead looking at me >as i walk past her she nerviously says "hi" >I saw hi to her and she runs away giggling What should one take away from a situation like this? 07/27/23(Thu)18:12:47 No.74181792 Anonymous >>74181776 (OP) # Well obviously she wants the D, go ask her father for her hand in marriage 07/27/23(Thu)18:14:23 No.74181816 Anonymous >>74181776 (OP) # you should be locked away if you think theres anything to be taken away from this >>74182068 # >>74182083 # >>74182258 # >>74182316 # 07/27/23(Thu)18:37:48 No.74182068 : Anonymous >>74181816 # Jesus Christ he's a working man. This is the green text board. He posted shrek for christs sake. He didnt even argue with you after 20 minutes. You really think he's a bad guy? I seriously dont read him as one. You better be baiting s--- poster.

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Anon has time to kill | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 32 KB JPG 07/04/23(Tue)09:23:18 No.902026315 >be me >have a job 30 kilometers away from home >finished earlier so i can relax today since next 3 days are gonna be extremely stressful >on the way home there was an accident >got stuck in traffic for an hour >the road will be closed for the next 2-3 hours >drove back to the city as its extremely hot and now its raining >battery is on 4% What do i do for the next 2-3 hours anons
: Anonymous 32 KB JPG 07/04/23(Tue)09:23:18 No.902026315 >be me >have a job 30 kilometers away from home >finished earlier so i can relax today since next 3 days are gonna be extremely stressful >on the way home there was an accident >got stuck in traffic for an hour >the road will be closed for the next 2-3 hours >drove back to the city as its extremely hot and now its raining >battery is on 4% What do i do for the next 2-3 hours anons

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Looks good ngl | /r/Greentext

File: pizzanewyortk.jpg (3.68 MB, 4032x2697) Delicio Anonymous 07/19/23 (Wed) 22:05:28 No.184894239 >>184894249 >>184894251 Thank you USA for fixing pizza
File: pizzanewyortk.jpg (3.68 MB, 4032x2697) Delicio Anonymous 07/19/23 (Wed) 22:05:28 No.184894239 >>184894249 >>184894251 Thank you USA for fixing pizza

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anon fucks up | /r/Greentext

115 KB JPG instead >walking home one night >Mugger comes out of nowhere >"Give me your wallet!" >Unload my FN Five-seveN on him >Realize that I used 20 rounds of 5.7*28mm ammo
115 KB JPG instead >walking home one night >Mugger comes out of nowhere >"Give me your wallet!" >Unload my FN Five-seveN on him >Realize that I used 20 rounds of 5.7*28mm ammo

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Anon Is Ugly | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 60 KB PNG 07/27/23(Thu)16:28:13 No.74181304 >walking to my car >group of teen girls walks past >one of them goes "ewwww"
: Anonymous 60 KB PNG 07/27/23(Thu)16:28:13 No.74181304 >walking to my car >group of teen girls walks past >one of them goes "ewwww"

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Anon is healthy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/27/16(Wed)19:17:04 No.38070954 >>38070966 >>38071020 >>38071056 >>38071097 >>38071132 >>38071171 >>38070935 (OP) Why not have beans AND rice and some veggies mixed in for the ultimate dish? Oh, lemme guess. You're a meat eating f----- contributing to global warming, animal torture, disease, heart attacks, diabetes, and cancer. Anonymous 07/27/16(Wed)19:42:20 No.38071097 >>38071122 >>38071162 File: 5ba6a875a5b9143269c6ab0af().jpg (10 KB, 236x161) >>38070954 >be this anon >wake up from GMO free sleep >get out F%105 recycled tissue bed >take 10 BPA free steps and I'm in the kitchen >no breakfast >only breakslow >eating too fast causes gases to build up in intestines and contributes to greenhouse gases >open cabinet made out of recycled condoms >grab some mushrooms growing in the back comer >euthanize them >give them a funeral >cry as you mourn their death while consuming them >time to get ready for day >but on potato sack shirt made from all natural hemp >slip into cargo shorts >MorePockets MorePussy.png >sit on rock >begin peddling furiously >computer turns on >"Time to save the world" >begin shitposting on /fit/ furiously >make sure if there is even a single mention of food to remind everyone that meat eaters will burn in organic vegan hell A true hero
Anonymous 07/27/16(Wed)19:17:04 No.38070954 >>38070966 >>38071020 >>38071056 >>38071097 >>38071132 >>38071171 >>38070935 (OP) Why not have beans AND rice and some veggies mixed in for the ultimate dish? Oh, lemme guess. You're a meat eating f----- contributing to global warming, animal torture, disease, heart attacks, diabetes, and cancer. Anonymous 07/27/16(Wed)19:42:20 No.38071097 >>38071122 >>38071162 File: 5ba6a875a5b9143269c6ab0af().jpg (10 KB, 236x161) >>38070954 >be this anon >wake up from GMO free sleep >get out F%105 recycled tissue bed >take 10 BPA free steps and I'm in the kitchen >no breakfast >only breakslow >eating too fast causes gases to build up in intestines and contributes to greenhouse gases >open cabinet made out of recycled condoms >grab some mushrooms growing in the back comer >euthanize them >give them a funeral >cry as you mourn their death while consuming them >time to get ready for day >but on potato sack shirt made from all natural hemp >slip into cargo shorts >MorePockets MorePussy.png >sit on rock >begin peddling furiously >computer turns on >"Time to save the world" >begin shitposting on /fit/ furiously >make sure if there is even a single mention of food to remind everyone that meat eaters will burn in organic vegan hell A true hero

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Anon improves his life with one simple trick | /r/Greentext

jfk.jpg (235 KB, 1200x1556) google yandex iqdb wait O Anonymous 07/26/23 (Wed)21:22:18 No.903301730 ✓ >live in apartment >shower has bad water pressure >think "damn, this building has bad water pressure, ah well" >after literal years buy a new faucet >it has great water pressure what the F---
jfk.jpg (235 KB, 1200x1556) google yandex iqdb wait O Anonymous 07/26/23 (Wed)21:22:18 No.903301730 ✓ >live in apartment >shower has bad water pressure >think "damn, this building has bad water pressure, ah well" >after literal years buy a new faucet >it has great water pressure what the F---

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kino incoming | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2.19 MB PNG 07/24/23(Mon)19:53:12 No.187958150 Okay now I can see Nolan doing a 9/11 movie >huge no CGI building explosion >thriller aspects >multiple timelines or some kind of trick
: Anonymous 2.19 MB PNG 07/24/23(Mon)19:53:12 No.187958150 Okay now I can see Nolan doing a 9/11 movie >huge no CGI building explosion >thriller aspects >multiple timelines or some kind of trick

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