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Anon is a coomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)00:05:41 No.66850356 >live with gf of three years >in one bedroom apartment >masturbate 3+ times daily >usually to p---, nudes from exes, fantasies of previous one night stands etc 45 KB JPG >get up early and go to sleep late so I can coom without her noticing >usually at my desk or on living room couch >she's started to ask why we are not having sex as much >struggling to get it up around her now how do I break out of this habit? I wanted to be a changed man for 2022 but so far I have been cooming the usual amount
: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)00:05:41 No.66850356 >live with gf of three years >in one bedroom apartment >masturbate 3+ times daily >usually to p---, nudes from exes, fantasies of previous one night stands etc 45 KB JPG >get up early and go to sleep late so I can coom without her noticing >usually at my desk or on living room couch >she's started to ask why we are not having sex as much >struggling to get it up around her now how do I break out of this habit? I wanted to be a changed man for 2022 but so far I have been cooming the usual amount

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Anon downloads a video game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/08/20(Tue)02:43:04 No.535226782 1606304985763.gif 331 KB GIF >download video game for free >default search engine changes
: Anonymous 12/08/20(Tue)02:43:04 No.535226782 1606304985763.gif 331 KB GIF >download video game for free >default search engine changes

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Built for the job | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)10:54:45 No.66845628 >be me >20 year old virgin >considering visiting a w---- >don't want to visit one until I have a peak physique >working out consistently ever 151 KB GIF since What kind of mental disorder do I have? My sole reason for building a dream body is so I can f--- w----- without being insecure.
: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)10:54:45 No.66845628 >be me >20 year old virgin >considering visiting a w---- >don't want to visit one until I have a peak physique >working out consistently ever 151 KB GIF since What kind of mental disorder do I have? My sole reason for building a dream body is so I can f--- w----- without being insecure.

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Maze runner | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous What were your happy days /r9k(...) 01/04/22(Tue)10:07:34 No.66845307 >13~ years old in 2008 >on a school field trip, going to a corn maze >walking around in the maze with a friend talking about whatever >he says "How do they know that we're actually in here?" >l say "...they'd have to come find 189 KB JPG us" >I look at him >he looks at me >go to the edge of the maze and go out the other end >cross a road >go to McDonalds >go watch street performers >go to the skate park >go to the pond and talk to ducks >go to a pawn shop >go down to a river and find an abandoned truck, inside is a rusty pair of binoculars that looked like it was from the 1950s >return 6 hours later back through the maze, overly tanned and having done literally everything except walk around in a corn maze
: Anonymous What were your happy days /r9k(...) 01/04/22(Tue)10:07:34 No.66845307 >13~ years old in 2008 >on a school field trip, going to a corn maze >walking around in the maze with a friend talking about whatever >he says "How do they know that we're actually in here?" >l say "...they'd have to come find 189 KB JPG us" >I look at him >he looks at me >go to the edge of the maze and go out the other end >cross a road >go to McDonalds >go watch street performers >go to the skate park >go to the pond and talk to ducks >go to a pawn shop >go down to a river and find an abandoned truck, inside is a rusty pair of binoculars that looked like it was from the 1950s >return 6 hours later back through the maze, overly tanned and having done literally everything except walk around in a corn maze

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Anon meets a fallout fan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)23:19:33 No.66849726 >send asian girl a fallout meme >"omg anon I love fallout!" >ask her what her favourite fallout game is >"oh i've only played fallout shelter on my iphone"| 23 KB JPG 7 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)23:19:33 No.66849726 >send asian girl a fallout meme >"omg anon I love fallout!" >ask her what her favourite fallout game is >"oh i've only played fallout shelter on my iphone"| 23 KB JPG 7 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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Anon is circumcised | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)23:34:32 No.869984954 >playing video game >start thinking about how im circumcised >cant play game because im too angry How do i cope with this 215 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)23:34:32 No.869984954 >playing video game >start thinking about how im circumcised >cant play game because im too angry How do i cope with this 215 KB JPG 2 Replies View Thread

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Anon gets a gril pregnant | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/18/19(Mon)10:51:11 No.795297085 >get girl pregnant >tell parents im getting bullied at school >we move >mfw 26 KB JPG
: Anonymous 03/18/19(Mon)10:51:11 No.795297085 >get girl pregnant >tell parents im getting bullied at school >we move >mfw 26 KB JPG

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Anon goes to reddit | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)00:24:47 No.66850604 >browsing reddit >see a generic BOOHOO depression meme >caption reads something along the lines of would you take 1000 dollars but become ugly >EVERY SINGLE reply is "haha I'm already ugly" >l reply "no because I don't want to become ugly" 25 KB JPG >357 downvotes The miserable bring down others 1 Reply View Thread
: Anonymous 01/05/22(Wed)00:24:47 No.66850604 >browsing reddit >see a generic BOOHOO depression meme >caption reads something along the lines of would you take 1000 dollars but become ugly >EVERY SINGLE reply is "haha I'm already ugly" >l reply "no because I don't want to become ugly" 25 KB JPG >357 downvotes The miserable bring down others 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon is smart | /r/Greentext

Convince me the Egyptians weren't ancient 4chan >Loved cats >Used cryptic pictures to communicate >Hated the Jews 72 KB JPG >Lived in a desert s------- >Obsessed with triangles and symmetry because ancient autismo >Were smart as f--- >Had a woman that ruled them that people orbit to this day >Literally had a frog God called kek All the evidence is here you just have to understand it
Convince me the Egyptians weren't ancient 4chan >Loved cats >Used cryptic pictures to communicate >Hated the Jews 72 KB JPG >Lived in a desert s------- >Obsessed with triangles and symmetry because ancient autismo >Were smart as f--- >Had a woman that ruled them that people orbit to this day >Literally had a frog God called kek All the evidence is here you just have to understand it

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anon remembers a pepe | /r/Greentext

37 KB JPG I tried this for the first time recently and it pretty much just tasted like semen. Anonymous 04/11/17(Tue)09:39:47 No.8799612 >>8799585 (OP) >tasted like semen umm anon, how would you be able to make that compairson..you've sucked penis before haven't you? ..... Anonymous 04/11/17(Tue)09:42:52 No.8799615 >>8799612 Yes, I'm gay. So what? Grow up.
37 KB JPG I tried this for the first time recently and it pretty much just tasted like semen. Anonymous 04/11/17(Tue)09:39:47 No.8799612 >>8799585 (OP) >tasted like semen umm anon, how would you be able to make that compairson..you've sucked penis before haven't you? ..... Anonymous 04/11/17(Tue)09:42:52 No.8799615 >>8799612 Yes, I'm gay. So what? Grow up.

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Spoon bender | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)10:17:52 No.66845376 >keep having dream where I have cool ass telekinetic powers >wake up >don't have telekinetic powers this is b------- 321 KB PNG
: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)10:17:52 No.66845376 >keep having dream where I have cool ass telekinetic powers >wake up >don't have telekinetic powers this is b------- 321 KB PNG

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Can confirm it works. | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences akmatur 14 KB JPG >profit
| Anonymous 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences akmatur 14 KB JPG >profit

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Anon has made it | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/22/18(Thu)16:49:15 No.44875069 >fap all around my neighborhood, in bushes, behind trees etc >get noticed several times >"Police are looking for a man aged 20-30, muscular build" 158 KB JPG >"muscular build" >tfw finally made it Tell me your success stories, bros
: Anonymous 02/22/18(Thu)16:49:15 No.44875069 >fap all around my neighborhood, in bushes, behind trees etc >get noticed several times >"Police are looking for a man aged 20-30, muscular build" 158 KB JPG >"muscular build" >tfw finally made it Tell me your success stories, bros

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anon doesn't do well with the ladies! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/21(Wed)13:39:26 No.61737841 > be me > in highschool > accidentally bump into girl in the hallway > she says "ew" > mfw this happens on multiple occasions > mfw they aren't even trying to be mean, its just a gut reaction 54 KB JPG one girl was even very sweet and apologetic. She said she was sorry and it just slipped out. i said it was fine and i continued my way to class. what henious crimes must i have committed in a past life to deserve this? is this punishment for prior sins?
: Anonymous 01/06/21(Wed)13:39:26 No.61737841 > be me > in highschool > accidentally bump into girl in the hallway > she says "ew" > mfw this happens on multiple occasions > mfw they aren't even trying to be mean, its just a gut reaction 54 KB JPG one girl was even very sweet and apologetic. She said she was sorry and it just slipped out. i said it was fine and i continued my way to class. what henious crimes must i have committed in a past life to deserve this? is this punishment for prior sins?

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Anon plays gta | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: (raynb/g First post here so yeah 03/19/19(Tue)19:31:43 No.207057313 >be me 5 minutes ago >playing gta v >some guy is hacking >notice he's spamming non english characters F----- XIba >idea 77 KB JPG >type "1989 tiananmen square massacre winnie the pooh" >chinese hacker has disappeared hows your day been anons?
: Anonymous (ID: (raynb/g First post here so yeah 03/19/19(Tue)19:31:43 No.207057313 >be me 5 minutes ago >playing gta v >some guy is hacking >notice he's spamming non english characters F----- XIba >idea 77 KB JPG >type "1989 tiananmen square massacre winnie the pooh" >chinese hacker has disappeared hows your day been anons?

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Anon tells the truth about Joe | /r/Greentext

Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his show is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works "glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow" but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like "Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? Tiny hat man say fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong" and people just nervously go "oh-oh ok h-Haha yah I guess so" 83 KB JPG "Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and sword, but joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe."
Joe Rogan is like some barbarian Khan from the steppes that took an interest in intellectual things and his show is basically him bringing slightly nervous scholars and magicians to come before him to explain how the world works "glasses man, you explain to Joe why sky big, and how tree grow" but he will also believe almost anything you tell him, and only recently (in the past few years) does he clap back like "Tiny hat man say otherwise, do you lie to Joe? Tiny hat man say fat not bad for you, that sugar is enemy, so which is truth? Joe thinks you are wrong" and people just nervously go "oh-oh ok h-Haha yah I guess so" 83 KB JPG "Joe spend many moons on horseback and training with bow and sword, but joe also wonder why skyfire rise from mountains every morning, you will explain this to Joe."

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Anon leaves a mark | /r/Greentext

File: image jpg (76 KB, 640x960) Anonymous 07/14/15(Tue)23:37:15 No.627954199 (Reply] story time /b/ Alright. Never told anyone this but I guess f--- it. Here it goes. >be me >23 >finally move out and start life with gf >small apartment >pretty nice >we f----- a lot but she didn't like anything nasty. >just f------ and handjobs ask if I can t---- f--- her one night >we're both ass naked. >she agrees >l get on top of her and she squeezes her t--- on my c--- f--- her t------ intensely >c-- everywhere >get off >man! That was f------ awesomel >she stays quiet >ask her what's wrong >she's still quiet. >turn around and look at her >she has a dead stare to her stomach >I look >I left a giant skid mark from my ass thrusting >I tell her l'm so sorry and I didn't know >she gets her clothes and leaves >didn't see her for about a week >she broke up with me >went suicidal for a few days
File: image jpg (76 KB, 640x960) Anonymous 07/14/15(Tue)23:37:15 No.627954199 (Reply] story time /b/ Alright. Never told anyone this but I guess f--- it. Here it goes. >be me >23 >finally move out and start life with gf >small apartment >pretty nice >we f----- a lot but she didn't like anything nasty. >just f------ and handjobs ask if I can t---- f--- her one night >we're both ass naked. >she agrees >l get on top of her and she squeezes her t--- on my c--- f--- her t------ intensely >c-- everywhere >get off >man! That was f------ awesomel >she stays quiet >ask her what's wrong >she's still quiet. >turn around and look at her >she has a dead stare to her stomach >I look >I left a giant skid mark from my ass thrusting >I tell her l'm so sorry and I didn't know >she gets her clothes and leaves >didn't see her for about a week >she broke up with me >went suicidal for a few days

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Anon finds a frog | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)15:00:47 No.869960186 >>869960076 (OP) # when I was 5 I found a frog in the backyard and I ran and showed my mother and she thought it was beautiful and told me to go out to the pond and set it free and for 23 KB PNG some f------ reason I put it down on a stone and stomped on it and killed it >>869960416 # >>869960576 # >>869961389 # : Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)15:06:44 No.869960416 >>869960186 # >for some f------ reason f----- retard. >>869960532 #
: Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)15:00:47 No.869960186 >>869960076 (OP) # when I was 5 I found a frog in the backyard and I ran and showed my mother and she thought it was beautiful and told me to go out to the pond and set it free and for 23 KB PNG some f------ reason I put it down on a stone and stomped on it and killed it >>869960416 # >>869960576 # >>869961389 # : Anonymous 01/04/22(Tue)15:06:44 No.869960416 >>869960186 # >for some f------ reason f----- retard. >>869960532 #

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anon loves his dad. | /r/Greentext


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Anon meets a redcoat | /r/Greentext


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