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What did they mean by this? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/24/24(Sat) 13:04:35 No.202842849 59f8787f3cec115efb36238b.png 83 KB PNG >Looks don't matter, even a literal ogre can get a wife!... Unless you're short, then it's ok to make fun of you and you deserve no love
Anonymous 08/24/24(Sat) 13:04:35 No.202842849 59f8787f3cec115efb36238b.png 83 KB PNG >Looks don't matter, even a literal ogre can get a wife!... Unless you're short, then it's ok to make fun of you and you deserve no love

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Anon is on the hunt | /r/Greentext

File: IMG_3697.jpg (1.57 MB, 1800x2400) TRACKING BIGFOOT Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:00:16 No.38679840 >>38679854 >>38679950 >>38679968 >>38680064 >>38680292 >>38680602 >>38681042 >>38681660 >>38681728 >>38682295 >>38684121 >>38684695>>38685620 >>38687296 >>38691191 >>38692180 >> >> I am currently on a mission to become the first man on earth to slay a Bigfoot. I've spotted him a few times on my property running across my driveway while i pull down it coming home. I got home early today, I'm posted up in my driveway waiting on him this time. I'm going to take this Bigfoot f----- down once and for all. >pic related >my driveway >my weapon of choice ☐ Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:01:57 No.38679854 >>38679859 >>38679840 (OP) # >fps bigfoot hunt I'm in, anon. I'd watch that. Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:03:06 No.38679859 >>38679867 >>38679854 # I'll keep you posted I hear something loud in the woods right now i think he's getting close Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:04:10 No.38679867 ► >>38679859 # Bump. Get that son of a bitch. Anonymous 08/27/21(Tue)17:06.20
File: IMG_3697.jpg (1.57 MB, 1800x2400) TRACKING BIGFOOT Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:00:16 No.38679840 >>38679854 >>38679950 >>38679968 >>38680064 >>38680292 >>38680602 >>38681042 >>38681660 >>38681728 >>38682295 >>38684121 >>38684695>>38685620 >>38687296 >>38691191 >>38692180 >> >> I am currently on a mission to become the first man on earth to slay a Bigfoot. I've spotted him a few times on my property running across my driveway while i pull down it coming home. I got home early today, I'm posted up in my driveway waiting on him this time. I'm going to take this Bigfoot f----- down once and for all. >pic related >my driveway >my weapon of choice ☐ Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:01:57 No.38679854 >>38679859 >>38679840 (OP) # >fps bigfoot hunt I'm in, anon. I'd watch that. Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:03:06 No.38679859 >>38679867 >>38679854 # I'll keep you posted I hear something loud in the woods right now i think he's getting close Anonymous 08/27/24(Tue)17:04:10 No.38679867 ► >>38679859 # Bump. Get that son of a bitch. Anonymous 08/27/21(Tue)17:06.20

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Anon is drunk | /r/Greentext

>be me >hear a lot about how people get addicted to alcohol >"if they're getting addicted it must feel really great" >tastes really bitter >makes you feel confused for a while >no actual good feelings no high no nothing just a lot of mental impariment What's the point of this even? I'm drunk right now and I never want to do this again.
>be me >hear a lot about how people get addicted to alcohol >"if they're getting addicted it must feel really great" >tastes really bitter >makes you feel confused for a while >no actual good feelings no high no nothing just a lot of mental impariment What's the point of this even? I'm drunk right now and I never want to do this again.

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I don't see why people crushed so hard on Katie Leung | /r/Greentext

XXX >Albus Severus, did I ever tell you about Ching Chong? She was your father's exotic teenage witch apprentice, a fine piece of j------- from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the school; barely legal by Muggle laws. Harry and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful training during our attempted high school militia, and once in a while we'd even have the entire Dumbledore Army run a train over her, part of official witch "training" of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatwand better than anyone in 55 KB JPG Hogwart. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in the wizarding world, and since she was constantly doing nothing useful you'd get a glimpse of her chink p---- mid cry as she'd betray you while slicing a House elf in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her wand backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by gobelins and dementors almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant p---- Albus Severus, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
XXX >Albus Severus, did I ever tell you about Ching Chong? She was your father's exotic teenage witch apprentice, a fine piece of j------- from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the school; barely legal by Muggle laws. Harry and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful training during our attempted high school militia, and once in a while we'd even have the entire Dumbledore Army run a train over her, part of official witch "training" of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatwand better than anyone in 55 KB JPG Hogwart. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in the wizarding world, and since she was constantly doing nothing useful you'd get a glimpse of her chink p---- mid cry as she'd betray you while slicing a House elf in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her wand backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by gobelins and dementors almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant p---- Albus Severus, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.

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Anon is a theoretical phycisit | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/15/23(Fri)13:27:23 No.660769336 IMG_0113.jpg 908 KB JPG >Be Theoretical Physicist >Game starts with you doing an experiment 0/10 immersion ruined
Anonymous 12/15/23(Fri)13:27:23 No.660769336 IMG_0113.jpg 908 KB JPG >Be Theoretical Physicist >Game starts with you doing an experiment 0/10 immersion ruined

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Anon goes to a bar | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I got AIDS doing the right thi(...) 109 KB JPG 08/29/24(Thu)05:13:56 No.21107841 Be me: >go to bar for some fun >walk in and some n----- shoots someone and runs >dudes bleeding from his leg, artery nicked >run to med kit, glove up, and begin packing bullet hole with goss on the artery >Dude still bleeds, but is slowed >emt comes and the dude who got shot tells the emt he has aids >my face when I hear that >get blood tested days later >it's positive I saved someone's life and paid the price for doing good. My life is ruined at 25 and knowing there's nothing I can do to fix it. I want to kill myself...
: Anonymous I got AIDS doing the right thi(...) 109 KB JPG 08/29/24(Thu)05:13:56 No.21107841 Be me: >go to bar for some fun >walk in and some n----- shoots someone and runs >dudes bleeding from his leg, artery nicked >run to med kit, glove up, and begin packing bullet hole with goss on the artery >Dude still bleeds, but is slowed >emt comes and the dude who got shot tells the emt he has aids >my face when I hear that >get blood tested days later >it's positive I saved someone's life and paid the price for doing good. My life is ruined at 25 and knowing there's nothing I can do to fix it. I want to kill myself...

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Anon understands | /r/Greentext

128,0 kB PNG >playing a single player shooter game >spend the entire playthrough hoarding all the primo ammo types and never using them >only use the s-------- weapons and ammo because "I might need the good stuff later" >complete the final mission >suddenly realize I got through the whole game without ever having fun with the coolest weapons in it >realize I'm doing the same thing with my actual life
128,0 kB PNG >playing a single player shooter game >spend the entire playthrough hoarding all the primo ammo types and never using them >only use the s-------- weapons and ammo because "I might need the good stuff later" >complete the final mission >suddenly realize I got through the whole game without ever having fun with the coolest weapons in it >realize I'm doing the same thing with my actual life

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Against all odds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/24/24(Sat) 08:42:34 No.686532052 1661040134048.jpg 176 KB JPG >I am a lesbian in a desolate, cruel, post-apocalyptic society, where humanity has been put on the endangered list due to nuclear warfare, raiding cannibals and mutant monsters.
: Anonymous 08/24/24(Sat) 08:42:34 No.686532052 1661040134048.jpg 176 KB JPG >I am a lesbian in a desolate, cruel, post-apocalyptic society, where humanity has been put on the endangered list due to nuclear warfare, raiding cannibals and mutant monsters.

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Anon hungers | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/16/22(Fri)13:25:40 No.885734753 >these freshmen get smaller every year >i want to eat them >i hunger 200 KB JPG
Anonymous 09/16/22(Fri)13:25:40 No.885734753 >these freshmen get smaller every year >i want to eat them >i hunger 200 KB JPG

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Draco has had enough! | /r/Greentext

File: However.jpg (25 KB, 474x357) Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:35:00 No.203001650 >Yes, Yes well done Slytherin, well done indeed... Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:36:46 No.203001704 File: file.png (156 KB, 468x415) >>203001650 (OP) >>203001704 >>203001818 >>203001835 The points, you old f-----! Give me the points! Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:39:43 No.203001776 Canonically Dumbledore is drunk here
File: However.jpg (25 KB, 474x357) Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:35:00 No.203001650 >Yes, Yes well done Slytherin, well done indeed... Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:36:46 No.203001704 File: file.png (156 KB, 468x415) >>203001650 (OP) >>203001704 >>203001818 >>203001835 The points, you old f-----! Give me the points! Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)20:39:43 No.203001776 Canonically Dumbledore is drunk here

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Anon made an mistake | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 23andme 658 KB PNG 11/19/23(Sun)20:25:06 No.30203134 Guys me and my sister did the 23andMe and it turned out me and my sister aren't related at all. We both speculated she was adopted and we started flirting and was having sex within the week. A few months pass and our mom catches us f------ midorgasm. She spazzed out and started crying told dad and started vomiting. I told that that we know she was adopted and the 23andMe proved it. My mom said she wasn't adopted between sobs. I contacted 23andMe support and they apparently we got the results of someone else. I went to move in with my dad and I'm not allowed contact with my sister anymore. My sister is freaking out over the fact she f----- her bio brother. I still want to keep f------ her though. Do I have a lawsuit here against 23andMe? I feel like they are at fault here. 5 Replies View Thread
Anonymous 23andme 658 KB PNG 11/19/23(Sun)20:25:06 No.30203134 Guys me and my sister did the 23andMe and it turned out me and my sister aren't related at all. We both speculated she was adopted and we started flirting and was having sex within the week. A few months pass and our mom catches us f------ midorgasm. She spazzed out and started crying told dad and started vomiting. I told that that we know she was adopted and the 23andMe proved it. My mom said she wasn't adopted between sobs. I contacted 23andMe support and they apparently we got the results of someone else. I went to move in with my dad and I'm not allowed contact with my sister anymore. My sister is freaking out over the fact she f----- her bio brother. I still want to keep f------ her though. Do I have a lawsuit here against 23andMe? I feel like they are at fault here. 5 Replies View Thread

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Anon meets a nice man | /r/Greentext

14 KB JPG >I look up >when I was 9 I went to Vegas >we were at a hotel I can't remember which one and getting on an elevator >I hear a burley voice ask to hold the door >my parents look like they've just seen a ghost >John f------ Goodman is standing there in a nice suit fairly tipsy >my parents are in awe same as me >I said "you're the guy from the Flintstones!" >he yells "oh boy are you right! yabadabadoo!" asks my dad to hold his cigar and picks me up >points down at my shirt and says "whats that?" and then flicks my nose >I was laughing and he chuckled and said "good kid you got here" >he put me down reaches in his pocket, pulls out a money clip and gave my parents a couple hundred dollars each and a cigar and said "you guys enjoy your trip huh?" >we walk out of the elevator and look back and he points a finger gun at me and clicks his tongue, waves goodbye to my parents >totally awesome dude 10/10 celebrity >I will never not be a fan
14 KB JPG >I look up >when I was 9 I went to Vegas >we were at a hotel I can't remember which one and getting on an elevator >I hear a burley voice ask to hold the door >my parents look like they've just seen a ghost >John f------ Goodman is standing there in a nice suit fairly tipsy >my parents are in awe same as me >I said "you're the guy from the Flintstones!" >he yells "oh boy are you right! yabadabadoo!" asks my dad to hold his cigar and picks me up >points down at my shirt and says "whats that?" and then flicks my nose >I was laughing and he chuckled and said "good kid you got here" >he put me down reaches in his pocket, pulls out a money clip and gave my parents a couple hundred dollars each and a cigar and said "you guys enjoy your trip huh?" >we walk out of the elevator and look back and he points a finger gun at me and clicks his tongue, waves goodbye to my parents >totally awesome dude 10/10 celebrity >I will never not be a fan

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Anon and the Camp Counselor | /r/Greentext

XBOX 360 KINECT Cabela's ADVENTURE REQUIRES CAMP MAVE FUR GREEING E ACTIVISION ☐ Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)07:27:52 No.686992587 >Be me >9 >Go to Summer Camp >The Camp Counselor is a religious nut. Couldn't keep his job as a pastor since he screamed too loud indoors. >Gives mini sermons every time there's a camp role call. >Goes on a rant about video games. >"If you play video games you can't go to Heaven because you'll be so obsessed with them you won't like Heaven and find it boring." >Bummed out that I'm probably going to Hell for the rest of the day. Now that I sit down and think about it, how f------ boring is Heaven that it gets soloed by a video game and what specifically is it that God finds so offensive about Vidya?
XBOX 360 KINECT Cabela's ADVENTURE REQUIRES CAMP MAVE FUR GREEING E ACTIVISION ☐ Anonymous 08/28/24(Wed)07:27:52 No.686992587 >Be me >9 >Go to Summer Camp >The Camp Counselor is a religious nut. Couldn't keep his job as a pastor since he screamed too loud indoors. >Gives mini sermons every time there's a camp role call. >Goes on a rant about video games. >"If you play video games you can't go to Heaven because you'll be so obsessed with them you won't like Heaven and find it boring." >Bummed out that I'm probably going to Hell for the rest of the day. Now that I sit down and think about it, how f------ boring is Heaven that it gets soloed by a video game and what specifically is it that God finds so offensive about Vidya?

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The War Machine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/18/24(Thu)01:52:48 No.4842970 >Be me tumblr_mdcd66YvQT1qg7bdoo1_1280.jpg 110 KB JPG >Go to Summer camp >One of the activity blocks for the week is spending 1 hour a day at the Nature Center. >My group is in the Reptile portion of the center. >I get paired with this smoking hot blonde in mini shorts and a tube top. >She's constantly giving me bedroom eyes and "accidentally" lets the snake we're supposed to be taking care of crawl under her shirt and on her t---. >Finally get up the courage to ask for number on the last day of camp >Find out she already gave it to four other guys right before I ask. >Decide to not even bother Still wonder to this day whether or not I made the right choice.
Anonymous 07/18/24(Thu)01:52:48 No.4842970 >Be me tumblr_mdcd66YvQT1qg7bdoo1_1280.jpg 110 KB JPG >Go to Summer camp >One of the activity blocks for the week is spending 1 hour a day at the Nature Center. >My group is in the Reptile portion of the center. >I get paired with this smoking hot blonde in mini shorts and a tube top. >She's constantly giving me bedroom eyes and "accidentally" lets the snake we're supposed to be taking care of crawl under her shirt and on her t---. >Finally get up the courage to ask for number on the last day of camp >Find out she already gave it to four other guys right before I ask. >Decide to not even bother Still wonder to this day whether or not I made the right choice.

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No Faith in Medicine | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous eteezy cteezy ▼ Settings Mobile Home 08/28/24(Wed)18:44:01 No.78635333 Vecteezy 19 Vecte Vecteez Vecteez 2.58 MB PNG >Be doctors as recently as pre 1999 >Believe babies couldn't feel pain >Circumcise it >It cries during the process >"Nah, babies just cry just because" Were they retarded? Anonymous >>78635333 (OP) >you can't study this, that's anti-semitic 08/28/24(Wed)18:44:37 No.78635336
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous eteezy cteezy ▼ Settings Mobile Home 08/28/24(Wed)18:44:01 No.78635333 Vecteezy 19 Vecte Vecteez Vecteez 2.58 MB PNG >Be doctors as recently as pre 1999 >Believe babies couldn't feel pain >Circumcise it >It cries during the process >"Nah, babies just cry just because" Were they retarded? Anonymous >>78635333 (OP) >you can't study this, that's anti-semitic 08/28/24(Wed)18:44:37 No.78635336

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The War Machine | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 50 KB JPG something funny" >I say yes 07/18/24(Thu)00:33:06 No.4842903 >be me >1995 >six years old >my homeless druggie uncle is living with us for a few months >one day he comes in high as f--- with a very small baby kitten he found outside >"Hey Justin do you want to see >he squeezes the kitten as hard as he can and it quickly dies Is it pathetic that I still cry like a baby sometimes whenever I remember that despite being a 35 year old man my uncle died in 2002 from a drug overdose if anyone's curious
Anonymous 50 KB JPG something funny" >I say yes 07/18/24(Thu)00:33:06 No.4842903 >be me >1995 >six years old >my homeless druggie uncle is living with us for a few months >one day he comes in high as f--- with a very small baby kitten he found outside >"Hey Justin do you want to see >he squeezes the kitten as hard as he can and it quickly dies Is it pathetic that I still cry like a baby sometimes whenever I remember that despite being a 35 year old man my uncle died in 2002 from a drug overdose if anyone's curious

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Average American lore | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/04/24(Thu)19:26:03 No.194371461 RONALD REAGAN speaks out against SOCIALIZED MEDICINE Reagan-LPcover.jpg 86 KB JPG >a c-list actor's career flopped so now I have to pay $1000 to set foot in an ambulance any other examples like this?
: Anonymous 01/04/24(Thu)19:26:03 No.194371461 RONALD REAGAN speaks out against SOCIALIZED MEDICINE Reagan-LPcover.jpg 86 KB JPG >a c-list actor's career flopped so now I have to pay $1000 to set foot in an ambulance any other examples like this?

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Anon destroys a dream | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)08:33:19 No.31891275 >>31891287 >>31891302 >>31901714 >>31891201 (OP). >be me >boss is a f------ a------, hate him >suddenly big brain moment >pay a clickfarm to boost the lame content of my boss >watch him get delusional about becoming a tiktok influencer >he quits his job to chase the influencer dream >cancel the clickfarm, lol >he comes crawling back to the company >not as my boss anymore but as my assistant >life's good
Anonymous 08/26/24(Mon)08:33:19 No.31891275 >>31891287 >>31891302 >>31901714 >>31891201 (OP). >be me >boss is a f------ a------, hate him >suddenly big brain moment >pay a clickfarm to boost the lame content of my boss >watch him get delusional about becoming a tiktok influencer >he quits his job to chase the influencer dream >cancel the clickfarm, lol >he comes crawling back to the company >not as my boss anymore but as my assistant >life's good

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The gender conundrum | /r/Greentext

20 posts by this ID Anonymous (ID: IOSNCtWP) ☑ 08/21/24(Wed)10:01:24 No.479048057 IMG_0717.png 7 KB PNG >man sleeps with 20 chicks >he is a high test based alpha gigachad >woman sleeps with 20 dudes >she is a dirty w---- that destroys the fabric of society But >woman doesn't sleep with anybody >she is pure angel that waits for her prince >man doesn't sleep with anybody >he is a pathetic looser who should be laughed at
20 posts by this ID Anonymous (ID: IOSNCtWP) ☑ 08/21/24(Wed)10:01:24 No.479048057 IMG_0717.png 7 KB PNG >man sleeps with 20 chicks >he is a high test based alpha gigachad >woman sleeps with 20 dudes >she is a dirty w---- that destroys the fabric of society But >woman doesn't sleep with anybody >she is pure angel that waits for her prince >man doesn't sleep with anybody >he is a pathetic looser who should be laughed at

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anon is cringe | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Cringiest Alpha Moves Part 1 of 3 Accepting Your D 475 KB PNG check my mail 05/12/17(Fri)15:19:49 No.36972961 >be me >be 14 or so >live in college apartments and above a cute girl >think of some way to impress her >lightbulb.png >walk downstairs one night to >quietly drop a $1 bill on the ground >cute girl outside, notices I dropped it >sir, you dropped your dollar bill! >turn around slowly >"you can keep it" >walk away >mfw remembering this a few years later and realizing how cringe this was
Anonymous Cringiest Alpha Moves Part 1 of 3 Accepting Your D 475 KB PNG check my mail 05/12/17(Fri)15:19:49 No.36972961 >be me >be 14 or so >live in college apartments and above a cute girl >think of some way to impress her >lightbulb.png >walk downstairs one night to >quietly drop a $1 bill on the ground >cute girl outside, notices I dropped it >sir, you dropped your dollar bill! >turn around slowly >"you can keep it" >walk away >mfw remembering this a few years later and realizing how cringe this was

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