Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Anon does the Jeet Shaker | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon has political advice for Putin | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Texas in the 80s: | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/17/24(Wed)08:39:51 No.195078031 IMG_9291.jpg 32 KB JPG >Shotgun battle in the middle of the night. >Not one cop shows up.

: Anonymous 01/17/24(Wed)08:39:51 No.195078031 IMG_9291.jpg 32 KB JPG >Shotgun battle in the middle of the night. >Not one cop shows up.

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon's fun weekend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 98 KB JPG 01/17/24(Wed)03:45:34 No.912513922 >be me recently >Work construction in major city >All the guys go to the club on weekends >Join in for once >We meet a group of ladies who are in town and they're flirting us up all night >Things are kinda getting freaky as one of the girls asks me if I wanna go back to her room >Tell her I've got a micropenis and jokingly say "but you know what they say about us micro boys, great tongue and finger action" >Somehow this worked and I got laid, could barely penetrate but she helped me finish Having confidence really was the key all along wasn't it? F---

: Anonymous 98 KB JPG 01/17/24(Wed)03:45:34 No.912513922 >be me recently >Work construction in major city >All the guys go to the club on weekends >Join in for once >We meet a group of ladies who are in town and they're flirting us up all night >Things are kinda getting freaky as one of the girls asks me if I wanna go back to her room >Tell her I've got a micropenis and jokingly say "but you know what they say about us micro boys, great tongue and finger action" >Somehow this worked and I got laid, could barely penetrate but she helped me finish Having confidence really was the key all along wasn't it? F---

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is fucking stupid | /r/Greentext

MG_4057.png (150 KB, 640x628) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)07:20:03 No.76134506 ✓ >>76134514 >>76134521 What the f--- just happened >be me, 18, last year of HS >khhv >been talking to these 2 girls >school prom is coming up >i mention "i don't think im going to go, i have nobody to go with" >sad.png >both of them say "wanna come with me?" >badump.gif >then they look at each other and start arguing >i thought they were joking around >"haha why don't you both come with me then?" >they stop for a second >"sure!" Turns out they are serious. What the f---? I am a KHHV incel and I have always been rejected by girls, I think they are trying to humiliate me, I am scared bros

MG_4057.png (150 KB, 640x628) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)07:20:03 No.76134506 ✓ >>76134514 >>76134521 What the f--- just happened >be me, 18, last year of HS >khhv >been talking to these 2 girls >school prom is coming up >i mention "i don't think im going to go, i have nobody to go with" >sad.png >both of them say "wanna come with me?" >badump.gif >then they look at each other and start arguing >i thought they were joking around >"haha why don't you both come with me then?" >they stop for a second >"sure!" Turns out they are serious. What the f---? I am a KHHV incel and I have always been rejected by girls, I think they are trying to humiliate me, I am scared bros

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon eats peanut butter | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

I don't get it either | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

anon gets called a goblino by latina coworker | /r/Greentext

File: WHAT THE FUCKKKCKFKFJDE.jpg (238 KB, 1080x1354) Lol no u defo not white Haha yeah Em White Why do you say that? fym? i can tell be lookin at u that ur mixed half yt at most but thats okay if u a goblino 20 + G Text message Sure Ⓒ Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)12:41:46 No.192572604>>192572626 >>192572635 >>192572663 >>192572667 >>192572730 >>192572772 >>192572950 >>192573072 >>192573122 >>192573413 >>192573430 >>192573587 >>192573638 >>192573952 >>192573979 >>192574370 >>192574439 >>192574541 >>192575995 >>192576311 >>192576698 >>192577924 >>192578320 >>192578440 >>192578944 >Flirting with a Latina coworker via text >Topic of our racial background comes up >Tell her I'm White >She calls me a f------ goblino Bros what the f--- do I do? How does one respond to this? >> Anonymous fym? Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)12:43:40 No.192572626 ► >>192572604 (OP) latrinos really be throwing rocks from glass houses 01/16/24(Tue)12:44:06 No.192572635 ► Lol no u defo not white >>192572604 (OP) I already want to Wife her and make castizos >t. Actual A---- + 哈 Haha yeah I'm White Why do you say that? i can tell be lookin at u that ur mixed half yt at most but thats okay if u a goblino 20 →∞ Text message Okay Sure

File: WHAT THE FUCKKKCKFKFJDE.jpg (238 KB, 1080x1354) Lol no u defo not white Haha yeah Em White Why do you say that? fym? i can tell be lookin at u that ur mixed half yt at most but thats okay if u a goblino 20 + G Text message Sure Ⓒ Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)12:41:46 No.192572604>>192572626 >>192572635 >>192572663 >>192572667 >>192572730 >>192572772 >>192572950 >>192573072 >>192573122 >>192573413 >>192573430 >>192573587 >>192573638 >>192573952 >>192573979 >>192574370 >>192574439 >>192574541 >>192575995 >>192576311 >>192576698 >>192577924 >>192578320 >>192578440 >>192578944 >Flirting with a Latina coworker via text >Topic of our racial background comes up >Tell her I'm White >She calls me a f------ goblino Bros what the f--- do I do? How does one respond to this? >> Anonymous fym? Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)12:43:40 No.192572626 ► >>192572604 (OP) latrinos really be throwing rocks from glass houses 01/16/24(Tue)12:44:06 No.192572635 ► Lol no u defo not white >>192572604 (OP) I already want to Wife her and make castizos >t. Actual A---- + 哈 Haha yeah I'm White Why do you say that? i can tell be lookin at u that ur mixed half yt at most but thats okay if u a goblino 20 →∞ Text message Okay Sure

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

were they stupid? | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anons and family | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous resentment I'm planning on disowning my family. I just can't be around them anymore. The holidays were a f------ nightmare. Every family gathering feels like a pissing contest for my siblings. My mother is an alcoholic who regularly booze cruises to and from her dead end job. I don't think she'll ever be able to retire and I refuse to take care of her when she's too old to work. Stock 01/16/24(Tue)20:46:01 No.76140317 93 KB JPG I know I'm supposed to love them unconditionally but I've just never felt very much towards any of them. I don't hate them but I know I won't feel guilty when I finally burn the bridge. Anyone else resent their family members? Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)20:58:12 No.76140448 2 christmases ago i s--- my pants at the family reunion to prove a point and they never invited me back

: Anonymous resentment I'm planning on disowning my family. I just can't be around them anymore. The holidays were a f------ nightmare. Every family gathering feels like a pissing contest for my siblings. My mother is an alcoholic who regularly booze cruises to and from her dead end job. I don't think she'll ever be able to retire and I refuse to take care of her when she's too old to work. Stock 01/16/24(Tue)20:46:01 No.76140317 93 KB JPG I know I'm supposed to love them unconditionally but I've just never felt very much towards any of them. I don't hate them but I know I won't feel guilty when I finally burn the bridge. Anyone else resent their family members? Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)20:58:12 No.76140448 2 christmases ago i s--- my pants at the family reunion to prove a point and they never invited me back

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is concerned | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)20:49:06 No.76140346 My room mate took the fattest s--- I have ever seen in my life and didn't bother to flush it. No lie this thing looked like a f------ football, could have done a 30 yard pass with had I tried, I've seen Pringles cans smaller than this s---, hell I've seen newborns smaller than this thing. At this point I get concerned, did it just fall out? Were they giving birth and I was oblivious because I was blowing my ears out with my AirPods? Why was it left in there? Are they permanently dilated? Are they ok? Did I save 15% or more on car insurance by switching to Geico? 26 KB JPG

Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)20:49:06 No.76140346 My room mate took the fattest s--- I have ever seen in my life and didn't bother to flush it. No lie this thing looked like a f------ football, could have done a 30 yard pass with had I tried, I've seen Pringles cans smaller than this s---, hell I've seen newborns smaller than this thing. At this point I get concerned, did it just fall out? Were they giving birth and I was oblivious because I was blowing my ears out with my AirPods? Why was it left in there? Are they permanently dilated? Are they ok? Did I save 15% or more on car insurance by switching to Geico? 26 KB JPG

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon realizes Childhood is a Scam | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)19:46:11 No.261908910 >>261905748 # >teenage used to be young adulthood, being a teenager comes from school curriculum going on for more years >become "adult" faster, have more time to get ready for middle age >now we all get over the hill before realising 375 KB PNG >retire when you're too tired to enjoy yourself and health is in decline >only have about 10 years to enjoy freedom >everyone says they "got old" all of a sudden

: Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)19:46:11 No.261908910 >>261905748 # >teenage used to be young adulthood, being a teenager comes from school curriculum going on for more years >become "adult" faster, have more time to get ready for middle age >now we all get over the hill before realising 375 KB PNG >retire when you're too tired to enjoy yourself and health is in decline >only have about 10 years to enjoy freedom >everyone says they "got old" all of a sudden

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon likes the three Stooges | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Republicans be like | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon does not enjoy Reddit | /r/Greentext

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is out of touch | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)10:25:48 No.912470060 29 KB JPG Have no friends so you guys get to hear this >eating lunch at a pizza buffet >kid walks by my table, looks around 12y/o >he walks up to his friends and says "Yo guys I took the last slice of cheese. I'm now officially a bitch!" >said it like he was all that and all his friends gave him like a nod of approval w-- does that mean? I'm only 25, I can't be that out of touch with gen alpha slang.

: Anonymous 01/16/24(Tue)10:25:48 No.912470060 29 KB JPG Have no friends so you guys get to hear this >eating lunch at a pizza buffet >kid walks by my table, looks around 12y/o >he walks up to his friends and says "Yo guys I took the last slice of cheese. I'm now officially a bitch!" >said it like he was all that and all his friends gave him like a nod of approval w-- does that mean? I'm only 25, I can't be that out of touch with gen alpha slang.

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is a tourist | /r/Greentext

File: 1376421194696.jpg-(1.56 MB, 2448x3264, image.jpg) Anonymous (ID: zri23dQ1) 08/13/13(Tue)15:13:14 No.499550295 Replies: >>499550661 >>499551303 >>499551374 >>499551564 >>499551673 >>499551825 >Be 25 year old American >go to Germany, first time in Europe >plane lands, I applaud >İn german airport, take off shoes, pants, leave 3 oz sample of blood, semen in quart sized ziploc >"sir, you don't need to do that. Just walk through the metal detector" >"sorry, nicht spriche deutsch" >"sir, I am speaking english. >Go directly through metal detector, do not get irradiated, do not get groped by TSA monopoly >Tip the security guard 5 Euro because that is the smallest paper money Spend the first day in Frankfurt. Frankfurt is a great city because there is nothing to do so literally anywhere else you go is great. >Walk to train station >lots of foreigners around, can't hear any english >walk with hand in back pocket to protect wallet >keep other hand in side pocket to protect phone. >Unable to operate ticket machine. Language options are Union Jack, Deutsch Flag, and France. >Get on train without ticket. >Gestapo officers in uniform comes up to me >"Morgen, karte bitte" >"I'm not Morgan." >"Apologies, Good Morning, ticket, please." >"Nicht spriche deutch" >"Sir, I speak english. >Can't understand his crazy nazimouth, tip him $30 Euro to leave me alone. >He tips me back for being a cool American. >Train arrives in Munich. Begin applauding. >Nobody claps, don't want to ruin my solid American applause. >tip every passenger for letting me solo. >Get rental car. >Too many pedals. >Walk to MacDonalds to get order Double Quarter Pounder. >F------ idiot gives me wrong meal, end up with Hamburger Royale Kasse >Only tip him 30% >use burger to weigh down extra pedal >car rolls backwards into river. >applaud the whole way in.

File: 1376421194696.jpg-(1.56 MB, 2448x3264, image.jpg) Anonymous (ID: zri23dQ1) 08/13/13(Tue)15:13:14 No.499550295 Replies: >>499550661 >>499551303 >>499551374 >>499551564 >>499551673 >>499551825 >Be 25 year old American >go to Germany, first time in Europe >plane lands, I applaud >İn german airport, take off shoes, pants, leave 3 oz sample of blood, semen in quart sized ziploc >"sir, you don't need to do that. Just walk through the metal detector" >"sorry, nicht spriche deutsch" >"sir, I am speaking english. >Go directly through metal detector, do not get irradiated, do not get groped by TSA monopoly >Tip the security guard 5 Euro because that is the smallest paper money Spend the first day in Frankfurt. Frankfurt is a great city because there is nothing to do so literally anywhere else you go is great. >Walk to train station >lots of foreigners around, can't hear any english >walk with hand in back pocket to protect wallet >keep other hand in side pocket to protect phone. >Unable to operate ticket machine. Language options are Union Jack, Deutsch Flag, and France. >Get on train without ticket. >Gestapo officers in uniform comes up to me >"Morgen, karte bitte" >"I'm not Morgan." >"Apologies, Good Morning, ticket, please." >"Nicht spriche deutch" >"Sir, I speak english. >Can't understand his crazy nazimouth, tip him $30 Euro to leave me alone. >He tips me back for being a cool American. >Train arrives in Munich. Begin applauding. >Nobody claps, don't want to ruin my solid American applause. >tip every passenger for letting me solo. >Get rental car. >Too many pedals. >Walk to MacDonalds to get order Double Quarter Pounder. >F------ idiot gives me wrong meal, end up with Hamburger Royale Kasse >Only tip him 30% >use burger to weigh down extra pedal >car rolls backwards into river. >applaud the whole way in.

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

DAMAGED psychopaths try cooking | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous MAREN 291 KB JPG Anonymous Anonymous ADD LITTLE BIT OF HORSE MEAT TO FOOD AND EVERYBODY LOSES THEIR MINDS 42 KB JPG : Anonymous :Anonymous 01/15/24(Mon)06:28:45 No.20103722 6 KB JPG >>20103752 # >frozen chicken tenders box says flip halfway through cooking >dont 01/15/24(Mon)06:30:58 No.20103726 01/15/24(Mon)06:31:06 No.20103727 >not supposed to use the popcorn button >use it >season to taste >season it without tasting 01/15/24(Mon)06:34:17 No.20103740 01/15/24(Mon) 06:34:33 No.20103742 >Expiration date was 3 days ago 17 >I ate it and I'm fine

: Anonymous MAREN 291 KB JPG Anonymous Anonymous ADD LITTLE BIT OF HORSE MEAT TO FOOD AND EVERYBODY LOSES THEIR MINDS 42 KB JPG : Anonymous :Anonymous 01/15/24(Mon)06:28:45 No.20103722 6 KB JPG >>20103752 # >frozen chicken tenders box says flip halfway through cooking >dont 01/15/24(Mon)06:30:58 No.20103726 01/15/24(Mon)06:31:06 No.20103727 >not supposed to use the popcorn button >use it >season to taste >season it without tasting 01/15/24(Mon)06:34:17 No.20103740 01/15/24(Mon) 06:34:33 No.20103742 >Expiration date was 3 days ago 17 >I ate it and I'm fine

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon Gets Burned | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 39 KB JPG 01/16/24(Tue)07:15:15 No.912463378 >be me lolichad >Single af >Visit prostitutes on a daily basis, whenever I feel like >About to be 35 >Think to myself "Time to get some Woman for myself" >Start hooking up >25yo woman >Date her >F--- her >Get STD >Spend f------ thousands to get back to normal Stay single bros, bitches ain't worth s---. Women red flags thread: >25yo or older >Tattoos 01/16/24(Tue)07:16:52 No.912463422 : Anonymous >>912463378 (OP) # >be me lolichad You're a chad prepubescent girl?

Anonymous 39 KB JPG 01/16/24(Tue)07:15:15 No.912463378 >be me lolichad >Single af >Visit prostitutes on a daily basis, whenever I feel like >About to be 35 >Think to myself "Time to get some Woman for myself" >Start hooking up >25yo woman >Date her >F--- her >Get STD >Spend f------ thousands to get back to normal Stay single bros, bitches ain't worth s---. Women red flags thread: >25yo or older >Tattoos 01/16/24(Tue)07:16:52 No.912463422 : Anonymous >>912463378 (OP) # >be me lolichad You're a chad prepubescent girl?

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

53 nominations and zero wins | /r/Greentext

> I am not crazy! I know they swapped those envelopes! I knew the winner was Better Call Saul. The one before Breaking Bad. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. They covered their tracks, they got that idiot at Ernst & Young to lie for them. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? They've done worse. The Wire! Are you telling me that the greatest TV show just happens to have 2 nominations? No! They orchestrated it! Emmy! They gave Game of Thrones' last season 14 nominations! And I watched them! and I shouldn't have. I promoted them on my own Twitter feed! What was I thinking? They'll never change. They'll NEVER change! Ever since they first aired, always the same! Couldn't keep their hands out of the ballot box! But not our Emmy! Couldn't be precious Emmy! Snubbing us blind! And they get to be on primetime!? What a sick joke! I should've stopped them when I had the chance! And you - you have to stop them! You-

> I am not crazy! I know they swapped those envelopes! I knew the winner was Better Call Saul. The one before Breaking Bad. As if I could ever make such a mistake. Never. Never! I just - I just couldn't prove it. They covered their tracks, they got that idiot at Ernst & Young to lie for them. You think this is something? You think this is bad? This? This chicanery? They've done worse. The Wire! Are you telling me that the greatest TV show just happens to have 2 nominations? No! They orchestrated it! Emmy! They gave Game of Thrones' last season 14 nominations! And I watched them! and I shouldn't have. I promoted them on my own Twitter feed! What was I thinking? They'll never change. They'll NEVER change! Ever since they first aired, always the same! Couldn't keep their hands out of the ballot box! But not our Emmy! Couldn't be precious Emmy! Snubbing us blind! And they get to be on primetime!? What a sick joke! I should've stopped them when I had the chance! And you - you have to stop them! You-

Greentext Stories

reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext