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Anon describes his gym | /r/Greentext

nope !!j197tWRYTzo 06/21/14(Sat)07:40:23 No.27205550 >>27205565>>27205759 >>27206436 >>27206685>>272 >that guy who wears all black and breathes heavy as f--- >that old guy who thinks he can control people minds and gives unwarranted advice >the joggers in weighted white track suits >that cardio bunny who wears a dress and keeps blabbering on about a stolen routine and her precious homegym >that pilot who let's his malcoloured pet yeti run amuck >that young guy with daddy issues who thinks he's the next zyzz >tfw nothing but machines everywhere >tfw lifting on the Death Star
nope !!j197tWRYTzo 06/21/14(Sat)07:40:23 No.27205550 >>27205565>>27205759 >>27206436 >>27206685>>272 >that guy who wears all black and breathes heavy as f--- >that old guy who thinks he can control people minds and gives unwarranted advice >the joggers in weighted white track suits >that cardio bunny who wears a dress and keeps blabbering on about a stolen routine and her precious homegym >that pilot who let's his malcoloured pet yeti run amuck >that young guy with daddy issues who thinks he's the next zyzz >tfw nothing but machines everywhere >tfw lifting on the Death Star

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Anon has a BONE to pick with a certain band | /r/Greentext

View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 50b.jpg, 41KiB, 500x375 Anonymous Tue 08 Aug 2023 18:03:01 No.117713473 Report >>117713455 King jizzard
View Same Google ImgOps iqdb SauceNAO 50b.jpg, 41KiB, 500x375 Anonymous Tue 08 Aug 2023 18:03:01 No.117713473 Report >>117713455 King jizzard

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Not addictive btw | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous How did you quit weed? 10/27/23(Fri)09:44:53 No.30039196 26 KB JPG >Started using marijuana recreationally mid-2022 >"this stuff is medicine. It's not bad like alcohol!" >Haven't gone more than a week without it since then >attention span has decreased, can't remember long digit numbers in my head >Used to study multiple hours with ease; now can't go 30 minutes without feeling the urge to procrastinate >Cant speak properly at all and mind always coming to a blank >haven't made any friends or progressed in my hobbies what was it like when you quit? Im really scared that I f----- up my brain's development and it can never go back to way it was. I drive out of campus back to my parents home every weekend and get high on by older sis's vape pen. Should I just stay on campus until the semester ends?
: Anonymous How did you quit weed? 10/27/23(Fri)09:44:53 No.30039196 26 KB JPG >Started using marijuana recreationally mid-2022 >"this stuff is medicine. It's not bad like alcohol!" >Haven't gone more than a week without it since then >attention span has decreased, can't remember long digit numbers in my head >Used to study multiple hours with ease; now can't go 30 minutes without feeling the urge to procrastinate >Cant speak properly at all and mind always coming to a blank >haven't made any friends or progressed in my hobbies what was it like when you quit? Im really scared that I f----- up my brain's development and it can never go back to way it was. I drive out of campus back to my parents home every weekend and get high on by older sis's vape pen. Should I just stay on campus until the semester ends?

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Anon goes for a swim | /r/Greentext

File: 1698258356177200.png (87 KB, 433x433) ☐ Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat) 20:54:57 No.908419501 >>908420303 >>908420382 >>908420983 >>908419879 Just remembered this from childhood >Be me >Maybe 12 at the time >At friend's house who is the same age >Just finished swimming in his pool >for some reason every time after swimming when we showered we needed to shower together to apparently save water >One time I tired to close and lock the door but my friends dad got mad and said to leave it open because "they're not a family of perverts" Was this normal? Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)20:56:28 No.908419879 >>908419501 (OP) # uhhhhh I think you might've been molested, anon.
File: 1698258356177200.png (87 KB, 433x433) ☐ Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat) 20:54:57 No.908419501 >>908420303 >>908420382 >>908420983 >>908419879 Just remembered this from childhood >Be me >Maybe 12 at the time >At friend's house who is the same age >Just finished swimming in his pool >for some reason every time after swimming when we showered we needed to shower together to apparently save water >One time I tired to close and lock the door but my friends dad got mad and said to leave it open because "they're not a family of perverts" Was this normal? Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)20:56:28 No.908419879 >>908419501 (OP) # uhhhhh I think you might've been molested, anon.

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Anon goes to a strip club | /r/Greentext

File: beae3209b8454727f99b077da(...).jpg (62 KB, 644x941) Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:17:55 No.908420798 >get first paycheck from new job >decide to treat myself >go to strip club >find girl who's exactly my type looks-wise >tall, fair skin, dark hair, huge natural t---, fat ass, thicc thighs, even the minor details like a soft but not round tummy >it's like I made her in a character creator >pay her to dance for me >we get along, talk while she dances >not sure if she really thinks I'm cute or if she just wants more money >decide to say something charming >she's wearing her hair in a bun >"I'd love to see you with your hair down some time." >I meant I might come back some time to see her again >"Sure! Like at a cafe or something?" >she thought I was asking her out >"Yeah! Totally!" >somehow get her number >feel so proud, tell all my friends I somehow successfully rizzed hot stripper >exchange text messages, phone calls >can't set a date until I get my next schedule from work >decide to make small talk in the mean time >ask her what she likes to do for fun >she says shopping, going to the gym, asks what I do for fun >decide to be honest >mostly gaming, also write fantasy stories >have to explain what I mean by fantasy >realize she's a bit of a normie, but that's actually what I want >"I know I'm a bit of a nerd." >"Yeah, it's a bit nerdy, but cute." >get my schedule, ask when she wants to meet >she ghosts me >realize I showed my power level too soon I bumbled my way in. Makes sense I'd bumble my way back out.
File: beae3209b8454727f99b077da(...).jpg (62 KB, 644x941) Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:17:55 No.908420798 >get first paycheck from new job >decide to treat myself >go to strip club >find girl who's exactly my type looks-wise >tall, fair skin, dark hair, huge natural t---, fat ass, thicc thighs, even the minor details like a soft but not round tummy >it's like I made her in a character creator >pay her to dance for me >we get along, talk while she dances >not sure if she really thinks I'm cute or if she just wants more money >decide to say something charming >she's wearing her hair in a bun >"I'd love to see you with your hair down some time." >I meant I might come back some time to see her again >"Sure! Like at a cafe or something?" >she thought I was asking her out >"Yeah! Totally!" >somehow get her number >feel so proud, tell all my friends I somehow successfully rizzed hot stripper >exchange text messages, phone calls >can't set a date until I get my next schedule from work >decide to make small talk in the mean time >ask her what she likes to do for fun >she says shopping, going to the gym, asks what I do for fun >decide to be honest >mostly gaming, also write fantasy stories >have to explain what I mean by fantasy >realize she's a bit of a normie, but that's actually what I want >"I know I'm a bit of a nerd." >"Yeah, it's a bit nerdy, but cute." >get my schedule, ask when she wants to meet >she ghosts me >realize I showed my power level too soon I bumbled my way in. Makes sense I'd bumble my way back out.

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Femanon is a woman on the Internet | /r/Greentext

File: ___rosa_tears_of_themis_dr(...).jpg (325 KB, 2048x1663) Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:43:54 No.75222719 >>75222743 >pretend to be a guy online >"anon you type like a girl are you a f----- or something?" >Get ghosted after 1 or 2 conversations because apparently I am not all that interesting >be myself online >"hey can I see your t--- and a picture of your fingering yourself? No? Ok, if I ever meet you I will r---- and behead you because that is what a w---- like you deserve!" >very often get sent a picture of their cocks What is wrong with you people like seriously? Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:46:36 No.75222743 >>75222719 (OP) # I hate f------ and women. Simple as
File: ___rosa_tears_of_themis_dr(...).jpg (325 KB, 2048x1663) Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:43:54 No.75222719 >>75222743 >pretend to be a guy online >"anon you type like a girl are you a f----- or something?" >Get ghosted after 1 or 2 conversations because apparently I am not all that interesting >be myself online >"hey can I see your t--- and a picture of your fingering yourself? No? Ok, if I ever meet you I will r---- and behead you because that is what a w---- like you deserve!" >very often get sent a picture of their cocks What is wrong with you people like seriously? Anonymous 10/28/23(Sat)21:46:36 No.75222743 >>75222719 (OP) # I hate f------ and women. Simple as

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Anon thinks hes a chad | /r/Greentext

>Me and qt coworker finishing work late and closing up >"Ah anon can you drive me home? my dad bailed on me and it's pretty dark" " >"..yeah I drive" >She smiles and gets in the car with me >On the way home she ask to stop by a gas station to pick up some things >"you give me a time and a place, I give you a five minute window. Anything happens in that five minutes and I'm yours. No matter what. Anything happens a minute either side of that and you're on your own. Do you understand? >she laughs softly and says "you're so cute sometimes anon, I'll be back in a second" >5 minute 1 second later she isn't back floor it
>Me and qt coworker finishing work late and closing up >"Ah anon can you drive me home? my dad bailed on me and it's pretty dark" " >"..yeah I drive" >She smiles and gets in the car with me >On the way home she ask to stop by a gas station to pick up some things >"you give me a time and a place, I give you a five minute window. Anything happens in that five minutes and I'm yours. No matter what. Anything happens a minute either side of that and you're on your own. Do you understand? >she laughs softly and says "you're so cute sometimes anon, I'll be back in a second" >5 minute 1 second later she isn't back floor it

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The whale fron finding nemo turned Anon gay and a vore and domination fetishist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/17/23(Tue)13:44:12 No.140074432 106 KB JPG >The whale from finding Nemo turned me gay. Im not kidding. I had the movie on DVD growing up and I would always get this weird feeling in my stomach when the scene with the whale came on. Something about the way the whales mouth is animated makes it seem so inviting and welcoming. The scene also invoked a sense of domination as marlin and dory are forced inside the mouth and then to the back of the throat and are unable to resist it. Turns out I had a vore fetish but did not understand it until I discovered vore online when I was entering high school. I used to grind against my mattress when I was little pretending it was the whales tongue and I would always end up hard but unable to c-- since I was unaware of m----------- at the time. Eventually I outgrew vore and started watching normal p--- although I believe this scene warped my psyche and caused me to have a domination fetish. The whale in the movie is male so I would always imagine a male whale in my fantasies and somewhere along the line I think that turned me gay.
Anonymous 10/17/23(Tue)13:44:12 No.140074432 106 KB JPG >The whale from finding Nemo turned me gay. Im not kidding. I had the movie on DVD growing up and I would always get this weird feeling in my stomach when the scene with the whale came on. Something about the way the whales mouth is animated makes it seem so inviting and welcoming. The scene also invoked a sense of domination as marlin and dory are forced inside the mouth and then to the back of the throat and are unable to resist it. Turns out I had a vore fetish but did not understand it until I discovered vore online when I was entering high school. I used to grind against my mattress when I was little pretending it was the whales tongue and I would always end up hard but unable to c-- since I was unaware of m----------- at the time. Eventually I outgrew vore and started watching normal p--- although I believe this scene warped my psyche and caused me to have a domination fetish. The whale in the movie is male so I would always imagine a male whale in my fantasies and somewhere along the line I think that turned me gay.

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One of the most amazing species | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 4 KB PNG 10/28/23(Sat)16:30:19 No.908403560 >Be me >Wife gets pregnant with twins S--- >Don't have my own place >Beg strangers to let me and my wife a place to stay > They agree >My wife gives birth > The room we live in is not big for the four of us > Ask strangers to leave their house > They refuse > Throw their children from a treetop to make room for my own > Be a Cuckoo Bird Pic unrelated
: Anonymous 4 KB PNG 10/28/23(Sat)16:30:19 No.908403560 >Be me >Wife gets pregnant with twins S--- >Don't have my own place >Beg strangers to let me and my wife a place to stay > They agree >My wife gives birth > The room we live in is not big for the four of us > Ask strangers to leave their house > They refuse > Throw their children from a treetop to make room for my own > Be a Cuckoo Bird Pic unrelated

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Anon says something you cannot unhear. | /r/Greentext

File 1187554435.jpg-(198 KB, 867x1026, megassasqueezethem.jpg) MAY BREASTS MEGASSA SQUEEZE THEM PLEASE NORD >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:13 No.5410954 >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:14 No.5410970 File :1187554466.jpg-(21 KB, 289x372, jarjar.jpg) >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:16 No.5411011 >>5410970 GODDAMNIT >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:15 No.5410994 >> Eurofag !qUytODkcyE 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411026 >>5410970 OH F--- >>5410970 BURN BUUUURRRRNNNN! AAAAA Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411031 F--- I CAN'T UNHEAR IT >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411037 "My breasts... Megassa squeeze them." File : 1187554662.jpg-(133 KB, 720x480, AAAAHH.jpg) >>5410970 HHHHHHHHHH!!!
File 1187554435.jpg-(198 KB, 867x1026, megassasqueezethem.jpg) MAY BREASTS MEGASSA SQUEEZE THEM PLEASE NORD >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:13 No.5410954 >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:14 No.5410970 File :1187554466.jpg-(21 KB, 289x372, jarjar.jpg) >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:16 No.5411011 >>5410970 GODDAMNIT >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:15 No.5410994 >> Eurofag !qUytODkcyE 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411026 >>5410970 OH F--- >>5410970 BURN BUUUURRRRNNNN! AAAAA Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411031 F--- I CAN'T UNHEAR IT >> Anonymous 08/19/07(Sun)16:17 No.5411037 "My breasts... Megassa squeeze them." File : 1187554662.jpg-(133 KB, 720x480, AAAAHH.jpg) >>5410970 HHHHHHHHHH!!!

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Anon is nervous | /r/Greentext

Anonymous This whole Al thing can't end (...) MS SUDOE Subanibe Lots of people are getting this deepfake com ad of me are social media platforms ady to handle theme of as deepfases? This is serinlem >Scammers using Deepfakes to mimic famous youtubers. >Al-Generated images begging to Trojan horse their way into meme culture to the dismay of photographers and artists. >Lifelike Al voices being used Willy-Nilly with zero consent or regulation. >All of this technology is decoloping at rapid speed and is becoming more and more lifelike by the day. >Governments are either doing nothing or are already actively using it. you're of the 10.000 aby p wallpape 15 Pro for at AN 10/27/23(Fri)21:01:05 No.96954899 116 KB JPG This is the begging of something terrible, I can feel it in my gut. Anonymous 10/27/23(Fri)21:02:43 No.96954923 good. i only use the internet because i'm forced to. i hope the entire thing crashes and burns 10/27/23(Fri)21:03:02 No.96954926 : Anonymous I'm glad it won't end well, I want everyone to be miserable like me.
Anonymous This whole Al thing can't end (...) MS SUDOE Subanibe Lots of people are getting this deepfake com ad of me are social media platforms ady to handle theme of as deepfases? This is serinlem >Scammers using Deepfakes to mimic famous youtubers. >Al-Generated images begging to Trojan horse their way into meme culture to the dismay of photographers and artists. >Lifelike Al voices being used Willy-Nilly with zero consent or regulation. >All of this technology is decoloping at rapid speed and is becoming more and more lifelike by the day. >Governments are either doing nothing or are already actively using it. you're of the 10.000 aby p wallpape 15 Pro for at AN 10/27/23(Fri)21:01:05 No.96954899 116 KB JPG This is the begging of something terrible, I can feel it in my gut. Anonymous 10/27/23(Fri)21:02:43 No.96954923 good. i only use the internet because i'm forced to. i hope the entire thing crashes and burns 10/27/23(Fri)21:03:02 No.96954926 : Anonymous I'm glad it won't end well, I want everyone to be miserable like me.

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Anon is socially retarded | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 190 KB JPG 10/27/23(Fri)16:02:26 No.908352424 >Everytime I'm emotionally vulnerable with a woman I get hurt. >Open up with highschool gf of 2 years that my father used to beat me >She says she wasn't ready for that and leaves >Open up to my gf in college that I want a pet vampire bat and plan to feed it with my own blood >She leaves >S-surely it's not all w-women right...?
: Anonymous 190 KB JPG 10/27/23(Fri)16:02:26 No.908352424 >Everytime I'm emotionally vulnerable with a woman I get hurt. >Open up with highschool gf of 2 years that my father used to beat me >She says she wasn't ready for that and leaves >Open up to my gf in college that I want a pet vampire bat and plan to feed it with my own blood >She leaves >S-surely it's not all w-women right...?

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Anon is insecure | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 21 KB JPG 10/28/23(Sat)15:21:15 No.655596860 >start playing a new game >check protagonist's height on the internet >quit playing if he is taller than me anyone else?
: Anonymous 21 KB JPG 10/28/23(Sat)15:21:15 No.655596860 >start playing a new game >check protagonist's height on the internet >quit playing if he is taller than me anyone else?

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Anon is an introvert | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 7 KB JPG 09/19/18 (Wed)15:20:34 No.48226468 >This Uber driver is known for great conversation View Thread
: Anonymous 7 KB JPG 09/19/18 (Wed)15:20:34 No.48226468 >This Uber driver is known for great conversation View Thread

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Anon is ready for Fortnite's old map | /r/Greentext

FORTNITE 2.24 MB PNG >be me >18 year old zoomer >See Fortnite chapter 1 announcement >Friend texts me >"Prime fortnite is back baby" >He comes over and starts sucking my c--- >Tells me my d--- is a reference to Fortnite because it's tilted >l e-------- all over him and he tells me it's like jonesy shooting with a tac shot >He buttfucks me and tells me he's gonna leave a purple Scar in my dusty divot >He moans "I'm one shot bro" >C--- everywhere turning my a------ into salty springs >We're both laying on my mattress in need of a revive >He has to get to work >I sit down at the edge of my bed with my taint feeling like moisty mire >"back to my lonely lodge" I say >I slurp the remaining juice from my ass getting one last taste of my bro before I see him again on November 3rd
FORTNITE 2.24 MB PNG >be me >18 year old zoomer >See Fortnite chapter 1 announcement >Friend texts me >"Prime fortnite is back baby" >He comes over and starts sucking my c--- >Tells me my d--- is a reference to Fortnite because it's tilted >l e-------- all over him and he tells me it's like jonesy shooting with a tac shot >He buttfucks me and tells me he's gonna leave a purple Scar in my dusty divot >He moans "I'm one shot bro" >C--- everywhere turning my a------ into salty springs >We're both laying on my mattress in need of a revive >He has to get to work >I sit down at the edge of my bed with my taint feeling like moisty mire >"back to my lonely lodge" I say >I slurp the remaining juice from my ass getting one last taste of my bro before I see him again on November 3rd

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Anon is a complete fucking dumbass | /r/Greentext

File: 1697473421412463.png (188 KB, 909x879) M. M Anonymous (ID: ackk11NC) 10/27/23 (Fri) 22:46:38 No.56491369 ► >>56491378 >>56491429 >>56491800 >>56491813 >>56491814 I'm too low IQ to work fast food. I couldn't wrap the burgers in the plastic wrappers right and they made me take a bun and wrapper home to practice. I quit out of pure humiliation and shame the next day. Anonymous (ID: GJL5thG8) 10/27/23(Fri)22:48:15 No.56491378 >>56491369 (OP) # Yeah when I worked at BK I was scared to talk to the cute girls
File: 1697473421412463.png (188 KB, 909x879) M. M Anonymous (ID: ackk11NC) 10/27/23 (Fri) 22:46:38 No.56491369 ► >>56491378 >>56491429 >>56491800 >>56491813 >>56491814 I'm too low IQ to work fast food. I couldn't wrap the burgers in the plastic wrappers right and they made me take a bun and wrapper home to practice. I quit out of pure humiliation and shame the next day. Anonymous (ID: GJL5thG8) 10/27/23(Fri)22:48:15 No.56491378 >>56491369 (OP) # Yeah when I worked at BK I was scared to talk to the cute girls

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