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Grandmas are literally the best | /r/Greentext

174 KB JPG >be me >be 13 >visiting grandmas house >grandma is really good at cooking a pork dinner >sit down with family >eat >pork dinner is really nice >yum >chocolate cake is nice >yum yum >thank you grandma >say to myself "I will remember this" >I still do >thank you for the memories
174 KB JPG >be me >be 13 >visiting grandmas house >grandma is really good at cooking a pork dinner >sit down with family >eat >pork dinner is really nice >yum >chocolate cake is nice >yum yum >thank you grandma >say to myself "I will remember this" >I still do >thank you for the memories

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Field deployment gone wrong | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/13/24(Tue) 17:14:58 No.202440654 DuelonCoruscant.jpg 499 KB JPG >Spend decades training up a Jedi in all manners of the force, its applications, and how to wield a lightsaber. >Die in mere seconds from Palpy >One guy only managed to block 1 hit before being dispatched.
: Anonymous 08/13/24(Tue) 17:14:58 No.202440654 DuelonCoruscant.jpg 499 KB JPG >Spend decades training up a Jedi in all manners of the force, its applications, and how to wield a lightsaber. >Die in mere seconds from Palpy >One guy only managed to block 1 hit before being dispatched.

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Crisis it is?! | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/12/24(Sun)21:28:46 No. 199094327 MV5BZWEYZmNIZGEtNmEwZi00ZjcyLThIM2ltMmFmMDY2N2JjMGVmX >crisis situation >woman immediately cuts her hair short Name this phenomenon 71 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/12/24(Sun)21:28:46 No. 199094327 MV5BZWEYZmNIZGEtNmEwZi00ZjcyLThIM2ltMmFmMDY2N2JjMGVmX >crisis situation >woman immediately cuts her hair short Name this phenomenon 71 KB JPG

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Probably greed | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)15:25:41 No.83193870 >Company goes public >It gets significantly worse Serious question. Why the f--- would any company go public ever. Valve is private and is doing f------ amazing. Everytime you hear a company go public it dies 3-5 years later. Why go public
Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)15:25:41 No.83193870 >Company goes public >It gets significantly worse Serious question. Why the f--- would any company go public ever. Valve is private and is doing f------ amazing. Everytime you hear a company go public it dies 3-5 years later. Why go public

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Anon loves to confuse people | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)18:41:18 No.78533310 >be me >train myself not to laugh >past month go to dunkin and ask for pickles and onions in water >sit there every morning and drink it in front of them like it's a coffee >they never ask
Anonymous 8 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)18:41:18 No.78533310 >be me >train myself not to laugh >past month go to dunkin and ask for pickles and onions in water >sit there every morning and drink it in front of them like it's a coffee >they never ask

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Anons at the polls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 59 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)16:25:38 No.78532222 >tfw major trumpfag but i literally can't afford groceries anymore might vote for kamala this election.. please forgive me bros i dont care about the gays or trannies or n------ i just want to afford food Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # >>tfw major trumpfag 08/18/24(Sun)16:27:48 No.78532236 Cuckservative retards shouldn't be allowed food Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # 08/18/24(Sun)17:49:43 No.78532904 How does it make sense to vote for someone who was in office as the vice president when the cost of food went up, OP? Walk me through your thinking process here. >>78532964 # Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # 08/18/24(Sun)17:53:30 No.78532938 It doesn't matter who you vote for, everything will still be expensive and you will still be poor
Anonymous 59 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)16:25:38 No.78532222 >tfw major trumpfag but i literally can't afford groceries anymore might vote for kamala this election.. please forgive me bros i dont care about the gays or trannies or n------ i just want to afford food Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # >>tfw major trumpfag 08/18/24(Sun)16:27:48 No.78532236 Cuckservative retards shouldn't be allowed food Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # 08/18/24(Sun)17:49:43 No.78532904 How does it make sense to vote for someone who was in office as the vice president when the cost of food went up, OP? Walk me through your thinking process here. >>78532964 # Anonymous >>78532222 (OP) # 08/18/24(Sun)17:53:30 No.78532938 It doesn't matter who you vote for, everything will still be expensive and you will still be poor

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"The most dangerous place on the Internet" | /r/Greentext

- File: 91408619_55df76d5-2245-4(...).jpg (58 KB, 976x850) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:45:13 No.78532866 [1] [Reply] >be me >take a s--- >flush toilet well that just happened ☐☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:46:54 No.78532879 this thread is stupid af but it made me laugh so thanks i guess ☐☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:51:19 No.78532916 the only believable gt lately - File: fat grease.png (81 KB, 347x288) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:08:24 No.78532538 [1] [Reply] you are poopy e ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:08:55 No.78532543 >>78532915 File: 1723584003604993.jpg (58 KB, 976x850) google yandex iqdb wait Hey you know what? f--- you e ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:51:16 No.78532915 >>78532543 ok poopy
- File: 91408619_55df76d5-2245-4(...).jpg (58 KB, 976x850) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:45:13 No.78532866 [1] [Reply] >be me >take a s--- >flush toilet well that just happened ☐☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:46:54 No.78532879 this thread is stupid af but it made me laugh so thanks i guess ☐☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:51:19 No.78532916 the only believable gt lately - File: fat grease.png (81 KB, 347x288) google yandex iqdb wait Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:08:24 No.78532538 [1] [Reply] you are poopy e ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:08:55 No.78532543 >>78532915 File: 1723584003604993.jpg (58 KB, 976x850) google yandex iqdb wait Hey you know what? f--- you e ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:51:16 No.78532915 >>78532543 ok poopy

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Anon lives with roommates | /r/Greentext

Anonymous VEN 08/18/24(Sun)16:46:45 No.78532355 >new roommates move in >THEY'RE USING MY F------ CONDIMENTS AGAIN HOW DOES ONE M----------- USE SO MUCH KETCHUP IN 3 DAYS?????? 14 KB JPG
Anonymous VEN 08/18/24(Sun)16:46:45 No.78532355 >new roommates move in >THEY'RE USING MY F------ CONDIMENTS AGAIN HOW DOES ONE M----------- USE SO MUCH KETCHUP IN 3 DAYS?????? 14 KB JPG

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Anon is a theologist | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: uJCWG4VT) How we can know the Bible is f(...) HO 11 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)18:16:42 No.478739263 >Be God, the omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent creator of reality >Require slaughtering innocent life to make you happy so you forgive humans for sinning >"You do bad things, so you better kill the highest quality innocent living things you can get or else I'll hate you." >For some reason, mutilating little boys penises is absolutely necessary. In fact, mutilate every male's penis for him, but especially 8-day old boys, that's what God, who created an entire universe, wants the most. >"If you kill the absolute best quality, best bred, most lovely innocent life you have for me, I'll make sure you can genocide your enemy tribes to the last man, woman, child, and animal. >"......except the Scythians, cause like, they have steel chariots and s--- and f--- all that mess. Of course I'm a real God, I created the universe you stupid f---! Now go mutilate more boy penises and kill the best innocent creatures you can find for me, idiot."
Anonymous (ID: uJCWG4VT) How we can know the Bible is f(...) HO 11 KB JPG 08/18/24(Sun)18:16:42 No.478739263 >Be God, the omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent creator of reality >Require slaughtering innocent life to make you happy so you forgive humans for sinning >"You do bad things, so you better kill the highest quality innocent living things you can get or else I'll hate you." >For some reason, mutilating little boys penises is absolutely necessary. In fact, mutilate every male's penis for him, but especially 8-day old boys, that's what God, who created an entire universe, wants the most. >"If you kill the absolute best quality, best bred, most lovely innocent life you have for me, I'll make sure you can genocide your enemy tribes to the last man, woman, child, and animal. >"......except the Scythians, cause like, they have steel chariots and s--- and f--- all that mess. Of course I'm a real God, I created the universe you stupid f---! Now go mutilate more boy penises and kill the best innocent creatures you can find for me, idiot."

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Doll lover | /r/Greentext

OB Anonymous ID: //gCW7n0 Tue 22 Aug 2023 17:14:45 No.438801146 >>438800979 View >I cant even imagine how sad and pathetic must feel a lonely man on a friday evening when he's done with the doll and with disgusts he watch at the dead plastic body filled with his weak c-- while normal people have their cozy/chad evenings. >I feel sad for you, anons. Hope you get better pic related t.poland
OB Anonymous ID: //gCW7n0 Tue 22 Aug 2023 17:14:45 No.438801146 >>438800979 View >I cant even imagine how sad and pathetic must feel a lonely man on a friday evening when he's done with the doll and with disgusts he watch at the dead plastic body filled with his weak c-- while normal people have their cozy/chad evenings. >I feel sad for you, anons. Hope you get better pic related t.poland

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Shifting Attack | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)10:46:52 No.27818406 1720067312948545.jpg 84 KB JPG >Car approaches you from behind doing 10+ mph more than you >move over to let them pass >they match your speed and hang out in your blind spot >they match your speed as you speed up, slow down, or even slam on the brakes I swear to god I hope these f----- NPC drivers hit a wall and burn to death
Anonymous 07/17/24(Wed)10:46:52 No.27818406 1720067312948545.jpg 84 KB JPG >Car approaches you from behind doing 10+ mph more than you >move over to let them pass >they match your speed and hang out in your blind spot >they match your speed as you speed up, slow down, or even slam on the brakes I swear to god I hope these f----- NPC drivers hit a wall and burn to death

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Anon Likes Grand Designs | /r/Greentext

File: 88a18d8279ab563ab91235e5f(...).jpg (672 KB, 1600x1200) GRAND DESIGNS Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:30:09 No.202619144 >>202621632 >its the Glass panes are 6mm too big after waiting 6 months for them to come from Italy Episode ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:38:25 No.202619291 >>202620564 >year five of the six month build >originally budgeted at £400,000 they're now at 1.5 million >the german factory capable of making the 2 inch thick custom curved glass has closed down >the builders used the wrong chemical portaloos and the council is about to remove their eco-friendly green belt planning permission >the tasteful modernisation they planned for the watermill has been halted after five grams of droppings of an endangered bat were found on the rafters >josephine, craig and little phineas have had to leave the caravan after their son developed brain fungus from the damp >they are now living in tarp chrysalises in the adjoining meadow >kevin mccloud is wearing a scarf and haranguing the two of them for their hubris ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)18:40:58 No.202620564 >>202619291 >kevin hosts a "where are they now" episode >phineas is f------ dead and the house still isn't finished ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:21:09 No.202621272 >It's another endless rain episode Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:29:05 No.202621410 >>202621433 i like when people say they'll be done in 6 months and kevin laughs at them Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:30:55 No.202621433 >>202621410 >backhandedly tells them the design is s--- Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:32:20 No.202621458 >We're spending all our money and energy building the most complicated house we can >I know, a new baby is the perfect addition to this stress! Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:34:37 No.202621494 >2 months into the build the wife gets cancer >she survives but it's crippled their finances >then the husband gets cancer ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:36:22 No.202621530 >>202621600 >>202621661 >>202621705 >>202621714 File: IMG_3432.jpg (1.36 MB, 3000x2002) >house is too big to sell Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:39:09 No.202621593 >Project is delayed and a little over budget >Couple say they are confident they can make up time >Cuts to next scene >Caption says 2020 oh nononono Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:41:05 No.202621632 >>202619144 (OP) It always ends up being a glass box. Middle class people have zero taste.
File: 88a18d8279ab563ab91235e5f(...).jpg (672 KB, 1600x1200) GRAND DESIGNS Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:30:09 No.202619144 >>202621632 >its the Glass panes are 6mm too big after waiting 6 months for them to come from Italy Episode ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)17:38:25 No.202619291 >>202620564 >year five of the six month build >originally budgeted at £400,000 they're now at 1.5 million >the german factory capable of making the 2 inch thick custom curved glass has closed down >the builders used the wrong chemical portaloos and the council is about to remove their eco-friendly green belt planning permission >the tasteful modernisation they planned for the watermill has been halted after five grams of droppings of an endangered bat were found on the rafters >josephine, craig and little phineas have had to leave the caravan after their son developed brain fungus from the damp >they are now living in tarp chrysalises in the adjoining meadow >kevin mccloud is wearing a scarf and haranguing the two of them for their hubris ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)18:40:58 No.202620564 >>202619291 >kevin hosts a "where are they now" episode >phineas is f------ dead and the house still isn't finished ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:21:09 No.202621272 >It's another endless rain episode Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:29:05 No.202621410 >>202621433 i like when people say they'll be done in 6 months and kevin laughs at them Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:30:55 No.202621433 >>202621410 >backhandedly tells them the design is s--- Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:32:20 No.202621458 >We're spending all our money and energy building the most complicated house we can >I know, a new baby is the perfect addition to this stress! Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:34:37 No.202621494 >2 months into the build the wife gets cancer >she survives but it's crippled their finances >then the husband gets cancer ☐ Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:36:22 No.202621530 >>202621600 >>202621661 >>202621705 >>202621714 File: IMG_3432.jpg (1.36 MB, 3000x2002) >house is too big to sell Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:39:09 No.202621593 >Project is delayed and a little over budget >Couple say they are confident they can make up time >Cuts to next scene >Caption says 2020 oh nononono Anonymous 08/18/24(Sun)19:41:05 No.202621632 >>202619144 (OP) It always ends up being a glass box. Middle class people have zero taste.

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Anon watch a documentary | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)01:29:11 No.47665686 074e7c5b-329e-49d7-b555-91929a374b37.jpg 57 KB JPG >be me >Watching Netflix health documentary >"haha fat people" >They're filming fatties in the street >"hey, I have that shirt" >"hey, I have those cargo shorts" >"hey, I know that building" >mfw 1 Reply Anonymous View Thread 08/22/18(Wed)01:31:06 No.47665705 so dont be fat you fat idiot
Anonymous 08/22/18(Wed)01:29:11 No.47665686 074e7c5b-329e-49d7-b555-91929a374b37.jpg 57 KB JPG >be me >Watching Netflix health documentary >"haha fat people" >They're filming fatties in the street >"hey, I have that shirt" >"hey, I have those cargo shorts" >"hey, I know that building" >mfw 1 Reply Anonymous View Thread 08/22/18(Wed)01:31:06 No.47665705 so dont be fat you fat idiot

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She was "The one" | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/13/24(Tue)04:24:27 No.202426434 IMG_3059.jpg 44 KB JPG >only wake up one woman Bro could have picked a dozen woman and lived the rest of his life having them fight over him.
: Anonymous 08/13/24(Tue)04:24:27 No.202426434 IMG_3059.jpg 44 KB JPG >only wake up one woman Bro could have picked a dozen woman and lived the rest of his life having them fight over him.

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Anon goes to a job interview | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 08/17/24(Sat)23:27:52 No.78525767 >see job listing online for a cook at a restaurant >apply for job >few hours later get an automated text saying they want me to schedule an interview >schedule the interview for the next day >the next day drive 20 minutes to the place for the interview >arrive right on time >walk in and tell the cashier im here for an interview >they get the manager >manager comes out and asks me what i want to do >i say "i applied to be a cook" >he says "sorry we're not hiring cooks right now have a good day" well that was a f------ waste of my time. why the hell would you post a job listing for a cook then? >inb4 its an old job listing it was posted 1 day ago
Anonymous 8 KB JPG 08/17/24(Sat)23:27:52 No.78525767 >see job listing online for a cook at a restaurant >apply for job >few hours later get an automated text saying they want me to schedule an interview >schedule the interview for the next day >the next day drive 20 minutes to the place for the interview >arrive right on time >walk in and tell the cashier im here for an interview >they get the manager >manager comes out and asks me what i want to do >i say "i applied to be a cook" >he says "sorry we're not hiring cooks right now have a good day" well that was a f------ waste of my time. why the hell would you post a job listing for a cook then? >inb4 its an old job listing it was posted 1 day ago

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Gassy nightmare | /r/Greentext

R: 4/1:1 Nightmare: Hello anons I'm creating a nightmare and would love some input
R: 4/1:1 Nightmare: Hello anons I'm creating a nightmare and would love some input

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1st and 2nd amendment furry | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8/17/2024, 8:24:26 PM No.58799177 >be me 11 KB JPEG >23 years old NEET >spending all day browsing 4chan and playing video games > one day stumble upon furry art >tfw I actually think some of it is kinda cute > never thought I'd consider joining the furry fandom > kinda curious though > decide to check out some furry forums >immediately bombarded with fursuits and OCs >what even is an OC >spend hours reading about fursonas > can't stop thinking about making my own >spend all my savings on a nice fursona design >tfw finally get it and it's a cute wolf >name it 'Wolfie' (real original, I know) >spend days drawing and writing backstory for 'Wolfie' >start to feel like I'm living a double life >current life = boring NEET > furry life = epic adventure with Wolfie > decide to join a local furry meet-up > nervous but excited > everyone is super friendly and welcoming >realize I've found my tribe >completely forget about real-life responsibilities >months go by, I'm fully immersed >shout out to all my new furry friends >haven't even bothered to look for a job >mom finds my furry art stash >'What is this, honey?' > awkward silence as I try to explain >she just shakes her head, says she loves me >tfw I actually feel accepted > never going back >mfw I became a furry and found my new purpose in life
Anonymous 8/17/2024, 8:24:26 PM No.58799177 >be me 11 KB JPEG >23 years old NEET >spending all day browsing 4chan and playing video games > one day stumble upon furry art >tfw I actually think some of it is kinda cute > never thought I'd consider joining the furry fandom > kinda curious though > decide to check out some furry forums >immediately bombarded with fursuits and OCs >what even is an OC >spend hours reading about fursonas > can't stop thinking about making my own >spend all my savings on a nice fursona design >tfw finally get it and it's a cute wolf >name it 'Wolfie' (real original, I know) >spend days drawing and writing backstory for 'Wolfie' >start to feel like I'm living a double life >current life = boring NEET > furry life = epic adventure with Wolfie > decide to join a local furry meet-up > nervous but excited > everyone is super friendly and welcoming >realize I've found my tribe >completely forget about real-life responsibilities >months go by, I'm fully immersed >shout out to all my new furry friends >haven't even bothered to look for a job >mom finds my furry art stash >'What is this, honey?' > awkward silence as I try to explain >she just shakes her head, says she loves me >tfw I actually feel accepted > never going back >mfw I became a furry and found my new purpose in life

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Anon Helps Quiet Kid | /r/Greentext

484 KB PNG >be me >in highschool >decide to give the quiet kid a chance, he seems alright >my friend and i approach him "hey dude yeah wassup u alright" >he has like no one to talk to he gives in >6 months go by, we are talking like usual >since i like to talk to lots of different people, people always come to talk to me >also, since quiet kid has no one he just kinda sticks by me most times >overtime, we talk less; other people see that he is likeable and hang out with him at school >eventually, we stop talking >no problem, my main intention was for him to have friends anyway fast forward months later >schools ended >check his instagram story >its him and his friends from our old highschool hanging out >see it quite frequently now >proud of him mission passed, glad that he actually has friends now
484 KB PNG >be me >in highschool >decide to give the quiet kid a chance, he seems alright >my friend and i approach him "hey dude yeah wassup u alright" >he has like no one to talk to he gives in >6 months go by, we are talking like usual >since i like to talk to lots of different people, people always come to talk to me >also, since quiet kid has no one he just kinda sticks by me most times >overtime, we talk less; other people see that he is likeable and hang out with him at school >eventually, we stop talking >no problem, my main intention was for him to have friends anyway fast forward months later >schools ended >check his instagram story >its him and his friends from our old highschool hanging out >see it quite frequently now >proud of him mission passed, glad that he actually has friends now

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Anon is a small village in france | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 43 KB JPG shore 07/26/21(Mon)13:35:44 No.124703397 >Be a small town in France >Beach keeps getting littered by Garfield phones for 30 years >Scuba diver finally locates an old shipping container underwater that got caught between rocks decades ago, filled with Garfield phones that keep washing out to >Government says it's too expensive to remove, they'd rather just let you deal with it >Estimates say you have 50 more years of Garfield phones to go 17 Replies Anonymous 07/26/21(Mon) 14:11:47 No.124704214 >>124703397 (OP) # >50 more years of Garfield phones to go This truly is a Monday moment
: Anonymous 43 KB JPG shore 07/26/21(Mon)13:35:44 No.124703397 >Be a small town in France >Beach keeps getting littered by Garfield phones for 30 years >Scuba diver finally locates an old shipping container underwater that got caught between rocks decades ago, filled with Garfield phones that keep washing out to >Government says it's too expensive to remove, they'd rather just let you deal with it >Estimates say you have 50 more years of Garfield phones to go 17 Replies Anonymous 07/26/21(Mon) 14:11:47 No.124704214 >>124703397 (OP) # >50 more years of Garfield phones to go This truly is a Monday moment

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Anon criticises the war crime game | /r/Greentext

Anonymous SPEC OPS THE LINE 08/16/24(Fri)12:38:14 No.685733403 >ITT games only low IQ people hate I'll start with a classic YAGER 11 KB JPG GAMES : Anonymous >>685733403 (OP) # 08/16/24(Fri)12:47:33 No.685734154 >s-see your a bad person!!! a bad soldier!!!!! >but killing those civilian was my only option to proceed with the game, an action has no morality attached if there's no choice >U COULD OF TURN OFF DA GAME!!!!!! U THE PLAYER BAD!!!!!! ooookay - >>685734418 # >>685736185 # >>685736881 # >>685739636 # >>685740805 #1
Anonymous SPEC OPS THE LINE 08/16/24(Fri)12:38:14 No.685733403 >ITT games only low IQ people hate I'll start with a classic YAGER 11 KB JPG GAMES : Anonymous >>685733403 (OP) # 08/16/24(Fri)12:47:33 No.685734154 >s-see your a bad person!!! a bad soldier!!!!! >but killing those civilian was my only option to proceed with the game, an action has no morality attached if there's no choice >U COULD OF TURN OFF DA GAME!!!!!! U THE PLAYER BAD!!!!!! ooookay - >>685734418 # >>685736185 # >>685736881 # >>685739636 # >>685740805 #1

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