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Anon really showed them | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/02/14(Sun)22:39:08 No.530509968 >Be me >First day of first grade >Dont really know anybody >See some girl that looks really 1.42 MB GIF cute >I start walking over >Random kid walks up >Says, yo thats my girlfriend >Girl in back starts laughing >So many emotions come forth >Decide the only logical thing to do is punch the f----- in jaw >Yell, "GET WRECKED F------ >Nurse runs up says, "What have you done?" >Turns out I broke the f------ jaw >Never allowed to teach at that school again.

Anonymous 02/02/14(Sun)22:39:08 No.530509968 >Be me >First day of first grade >Dont really know anybody >See some girl that looks really 1.42 MB GIF cute >I start walking over >Random kid walks up >Says, yo thats my girlfriend >Girl in back starts laughing >So many emotions come forth >Decide the only logical thing to do is punch the f----- in jaw >Yell, "GET WRECKED F------ >Nurse runs up says, "What have you done?" >Turns out I broke the f------ jaw >Never allowed to teach at that school again.

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Writer's block | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:52:26 No.64791948 >builds small block house >truly happy 2E3 13 KB PNG 7 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:06:36 No.64792054 >>64791987 # >been working at a kindergarten last year >one day, not a single child showed up (covid just started) >just spent the whole day building a giant building block castle with the other employers >best day of my life

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:52:26 No.64791948 >builds small block house >truly happy 2E3 13 KB PNG 7 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:06:36 No.64792054 >>64791987 # >been working at a kindergarten last year >one day, not a single child showed up (covid just started) >just spent the whole day building a giant building block castle with the other employers >best day of my life

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Chick flick | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:43:52 No.64792284 >cuddle with bf for a while after waking up and morning sex >say i dont want to get up and go to church todsy >bf flicks my forehead >it kinda hurt was this abuse or something Imao, i mean i know what he meant by it but ow, it actually hurt, i didnt know he 455 KB GIF was that string 9 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:10:29 No.64792435 >>64792284 (OP)# >having sex outside of marriage both going into the lake of fire.

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)08:43:52 No.64792284 >cuddle with bf for a while after waking up and morning sex >say i dont want to get up and go to church todsy >bf flicks my forehead >it kinda hurt was this abuse or something Imao, i mean i know what he meant by it but ow, it actually hurt, i didnt know he 455 KB GIF was that string 9 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:10:29 No.64792435 >>64792284 (OP)# >having sex outside of marriage both going into the lake of fire.

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Anon is a doomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:51:59 No.860103561 >be me >somewhat a p------------ >I hate my life and want to die >nothing gets better >I make changes >nothing gets better 22 KB JPG >mfw 22 Replies / 15 Images View Thread

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)07:51:59 No.860103561 >be me >somewhat a p------------ >I hate my life and want to die >nothing gets better >I make changes >nothing gets better 22 KB JPG >mfw 22 Replies / 15 Images View Thread

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Anon asks Lebron about the chaos emeralds | /r/Greentext

IERS lebron.jpg 62 KB JPG >LeBron chuckled. >"You mean the chaos emeralds?"

IERS lebron.jpg 62 KB JPG >LeBron chuckled. >"You mean the chaos emeralds?"

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Liars, damned liars, and statisticians | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:52:34 No.64792688 >Around 90% of single women are sexually active >Only around 20% of single men are sexually active >When girls complain about "all guys being the same", it's because they're literally f------ the same guys 22 KB JPG 5 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:54:56 No.64792716 >made up statistic lol

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:52:34 No.64792688 >Around 90% of single women are sexually active >Only around 20% of single men are sexually active >When girls complain about "all guys being the same", it's because they're literally f------ the same guys 22 KB JPG 5 Replies View Thread : Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)09:54:56 No.64792716 >made up statistic lol

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Anon makes a special friend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: D3z0W/5c ) I JUST NUTTED ON A MILLIPEDE 08/01/21(Sun)03:54:24 No.39350523 So something really interesting just happened to me: >fapping before bed >got my air strip of toilet paper all ready to catch my load >watching this sexy blondie get 3.38 MB JPG railed in a mini skirt >ohhh s--- i'm about to c-- >check to make sure i'm not about to miss the runway >there's a f------ millipede crawling on the toilet раper >already c------ at this point, too late to turn back >a fat wad just plops down on top of the poor bastard >it wiggles around for a second trying to find a way out of this hell >can't crawl through it because it's too thick >it stops moving, pretty sure it died in there >took pic related and flushed it How do we profit off of this bros?

: Anonymous (ID: D3z0W/5c ) I JUST NUTTED ON A MILLIPEDE 08/01/21(Sun)03:54:24 No.39350523 So something really interesting just happened to me: >fapping before bed >got my air strip of toilet paper all ready to catch my load >watching this sexy blondie get 3.38 MB JPG railed in a mini skirt >ohhh s--- i'm about to c-- >check to make sure i'm not about to miss the runway >there's a f------ millipede crawling on the toilet раper >already c------ at this point, too late to turn back >a fat wad just plops down on top of the poor bastard >it wiggles around for a second trying to find a way out of this hell >can't crawl through it because it's too thick >it stops moving, pretty sure it died in there >took pic related and flushed it How do we profit off of this bros?

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Anon finds Winston Churchill attractive | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)19:37:09 No.59126160 >wife has our 2nd kid >belly starts looking like this >accidentally refer to her tummy as 'Winston Churchill' when I am kissing it >only way to make her think its not 285 KB JPG cos it looks like an old wrinkled man is to tell her I find him sexually attractive >she has been dressing as him for 2 months now to have sex with me >am starting to actually find him hot >>59126193 # >>59126202 # >>59126837 # >>59127439 # >>59128547 # >>59128577 # >>59129694 # >>59138374 # >>59142250 #

: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)19:37:09 No.59126160 >wife has our 2nd kid >belly starts looking like this >accidentally refer to her tummy as 'Winston Churchill' when I am kissing it >only way to make her think its not 285 KB JPG cos it looks like an old wrinkled man is to tell her I find him sexually attractive >she has been dressing as him for 2 months now to have sex with me >am starting to actually find him hot >>59126193 # >>59126202 # >>59126837 # >>59127439 # >>59128547 # >>59128577 # >>59129694 # >>59138374 # >>59142250 #

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based anon cares about the planet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)13:50:52 No.860095367 >Meat industry is killing this planet. >It's wasteful on natural resourses >cruel to the animals >heavy contributor to global warming >exploitative of people in third world countries 43 KB JPG Don't believe me? Go check meatspin.com where all the data is presented in easy to digest format and properly sourced. STOP EATING MEAT YOU DUMB F----.

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)13:50:52 No.860095367 >Meat industry is killing this planet. >It's wasteful on natural resourses >cruel to the animals >heavy contributor to global warming >exploitative of people in third world countries 43 KB JPG Don't believe me? Go check meatspin.com where all the data is presented in easy to digest format and properly sourced. STOP EATING MEAT YOU DUMB F----.

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Man this is just sad... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/29/21(Thu)14:16:38 No.154241320 >Gf just left for bachelorette party in Vegas >Have the house all to myself >off work the rest of this week >Going to marathon some manly kino 147 KB JPG >fridge stocked with beer and pizza pre ordered Need some manly movie recommendations for the marathon, what do you think bros? : Anonymous 07/29/21(Thu)14:21:16 No.154241431 >>154241320 (OP)_# bros... who's gonna tell him?

: Anonymous 07/29/21(Thu)14:16:38 No.154241320 >Gf just left for bachelorette party in Vegas >Have the house all to myself >off work the rest of this week >Going to marathon some manly kino 147 KB JPG >fridge stocked with beer and pizza pre ordered Need some manly movie recommendations for the marathon, what do you think bros? : Anonymous 07/29/21(Thu)14:21:16 No.154241431 >>154241320 (OP)_# bros... who's gonna tell him?

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Chadanon buys Legos | /r/Greentext

File: gigachad.jpg (33 KB, 680x763) Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)03:31:36 No.860095856 ► >be me >buy Lego set off Amazon >receive package >leave 1 star review >"product was broken when shipped"

File: gigachad.jpg (33 KB, 680x763) Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)03:31:36 No.860095856 ► >be me >buy Lego set off Amazon >receive package >leave 1 star review >"product was broken when shipped"

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Anon finds true love | /r/Greentext

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Anon brings home a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)17:34:41 No.860103986 story time, this just happened >after years of trying, finally take a girl home >already diamonds with anticipation >undress her, go 'down there' >surprisingly warm, interesting bouquet >spread it because curiosity 9 KB JPG >fold back layers >keep folding back, trying to see deep >keep folding??? >realize she's not a girl after all >she's a 1/2 Ib arbys beef n cheddar >cheese all over my fingers >five more of these in the bag >i f--- my sandwich while crying

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)17:34:41 No.860103986 story time, this just happened >after years of trying, finally take a girl home >already diamonds with anticipation >undress her, go 'down there' >surprisingly warm, interesting bouquet >spread it because curiosity 9 KB JPG >fold back layers >keep folding back, trying to see deep >keep folding??? >realize she's not a girl after all >she's a 1/2 Ib arbys beef n cheddar >cheese all over my fingers >five more of these in the bag >i f--- my sandwich while crying

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Anon is dumb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)04:37:32 No.860096105 >l failed my iq test 3 KB JPG

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)04:37:32 No.860096105 >l failed my iq test 3 KB JPG

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Anon is in a Bind | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/24/17(Sun)19:15:01 No.754797723 >no social media >only go on reddit and 4chan >I hate reddit >4chan hates me 18 KB PNG

: Anonymous 12/24/17(Sun)19:15:01 No.754797723 >no social media >only go on reddit and 4chan >I hate reddit >4chan hates me 18 KB PNG

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Anon hates choking chickens | /r/Greentext

File: Brad.png (7 KB, 205x246) Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)18:53:25 No.860076027 >"Why yes I think homosexuals and marijuana users are degenerates" >Proceeds to masturbate multiple times a day This is at least 50% of you

File: Brad.png (7 KB, 205x246) Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)18:53:25 No.860076027 >"Why yes I think homosexuals and marijuana users are degenerates" >Proceeds to masturbate multiple times a day This is at least 50% of you

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Anon gets saved | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/27/21(Wed)17:15:19 No.845914110 >taking massive s--- >coming out sideways >hurts like hell >feel and hear anus tearing >losing lots of blood >pass out from blood loss >wake up around 15 minutes later 52 KB PNG >go to wipe >cleanwipe.doc >no blood, no s--- >feel around a------ >someone sewn up my gaping wound and cleaned it >blood and s--- still in toilet Thank you mystery a------ mender, i am forever in your debt

: Anonymous 01/27/21(Wed)17:15:19 No.845914110 >taking massive s--- >coming out sideways >hurts like hell >feel and hear anus tearing >losing lots of blood >pass out from blood loss >wake up around 15 minutes later 52 KB PNG >go to wipe >cleanwipe.doc >no blood, no s--- >feel around a------ >someone sewn up my gaping wound and cleaned it >blood and s--- still in toilet Thank you mystery a------ mender, i am forever in your debt

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Code Breaker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:05:41 No.64781585 >No, I will not learn how to code 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:08:27 No.64781604 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:09:15 No.64781609 >>64781585 (OP)# >l'm glad you can find comfort in that, fellow non-coder >l, personally, am a self-hating non-programmer >l can write fizzbuzz in a couple of languages and that's about it 5 KB JPG >l wish I had the interest to continue pursuing this, but unfortunately, I find myself quite depressed and, hence, unable to work up motivation to anything other than post on 4channel. >We should compare our lack of notes sometime.

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:05:41 No.64781585 >No, I will not learn how to code 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:08:27 No.64781604 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:09:15 No.64781609 >>64781585 (OP)# >l'm glad you can find comfort in that, fellow non-coder >l, personally, am a self-hating non-programmer >l can write fizzbuzz in a couple of languages and that's about it 5 KB JPG >l wish I had the interest to continue pursuing this, but unfortunately, I find myself quite depressed and, hence, unable to work up motivation to anything other than post on 4channel. >We should compare our lack of notes sometime.

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anon eats ass | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:30:54 No.18759024 spugeboob.jpg 17 KB JPG >mfw I lick her bussy and it fart (stinky)

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:30:54 No.18759024 spugeboob.jpg 17 KB JPG >mfw I lick her bussy and it fart (stinky)

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Anon gets a qt | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:46:36 No.785368644 >Be me >Be dating really hot middle eastern qt >Also niece of middle eastern president >FeelsBadman.jpeg Should I be scared? 92 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:48:30 No.785368751 >>785368644 (OP) # Lock her in your basement and ask for ransom you retard

: Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:46:36 No.785368644 >Be me >Be dating really hot middle eastern qt >Also niece of middle eastern president >FeelsBadman.jpeg Should I be scared? 92 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:48:30 No.785368751 >>785368644 (OP) # Lock her in your basement and ask for ransom you retard

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