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Tutorial gods | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 38 KB JPG 06/19/22(Sun)02:31:41 No.69095438 >*clicks video* >slight indian accent >thumbs down and reports the video >keeps watching anyway
: Anonymous 38 KB JPG 06/19/22(Sun)02:31:41 No.69095438 >*clicks video* >slight indian accent >thumbs down and reports the video >keeps watching anyway

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Anon has a broken home | /r/Greentext

06/18/22(Sat)06:03:50 No.69082302 >parents are drunk and screaming again >can't move away because I am mentally f----- up autist and can't sustain myself, neetbux won't suffice to live alone 06/18/22(Sat)06:04:38 No.69082305 06/18/22(Sat)06:05:09 No.69082310 : Anonymous 45 KB JPG I didn't deserve this Anonymous >>69082302 (OP) # Get a roommate and food stamps : Anonymous >>69082302 (OP) # Start drinking too, maybe it'll provide a bonding opportunity. >>69082459 # >>69083206 #
06/18/22(Sat)06:03:50 No.69082302 >parents are drunk and screaming again >can't move away because I am mentally f----- up autist and can't sustain myself, neetbux won't suffice to live alone 06/18/22(Sat)06:04:38 No.69082305 06/18/22(Sat)06:05:09 No.69082310 : Anonymous 45 KB JPG I didn't deserve this Anonymous >>69082302 (OP) # Get a roommate and food stamps : Anonymous >>69082302 (OP) # Start drinking too, maybe it'll provide a bonding opportunity. >>69082459 # >>69083206 #

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Anon likes coke | /r/Greentext

06/28/17(Wed)17:57:22 No.1223025 Ask a Korean that is proud of his country anything View Thread 06/28/17(Wed) 22:54:10 No.1225455 : Anonymous ? 40 KB PNG 243 Replies /19 Images : Anonymous (ID: OE0plP6b) >>1223025 (OP) # Pepsi isn't a f------ country retard
06/28/17(Wed)17:57:22 No.1223025 Ask a Korean that is proud of his country anything View Thread 06/28/17(Wed) 22:54:10 No.1225455 : Anonymous ? 40 KB PNG 243 Replies /19 Images : Anonymous (ID: OE0plP6b) >>1223025 (OP) # Pepsi isn't a f------ country retard

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Anon is jacking off | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/01/19(Mon)23:19:28 >be me jacking off late at night >run out of tissue to wipe up >what do? >lightbulb.wav >I take showers in the morning >youseewherethisisgoing.jpg >wipe c-- on my stomach until dry 62 KB JPG >wake up the next morning >usually have acne on my torso >I don't this morning >wotmate.stl >c-- is good for your skin >start doing it regularly >acne gone >few weeks later realize what I'm doing >realize that I'm an autist that rubs c-- on himself >mfw No.796451665
: Anonymous 04/01/19(Mon)23:19:28 >be me jacking off late at night >run out of tissue to wipe up >what do? >lightbulb.wav >I take showers in the morning >youseewherethisisgoing.jpg >wipe c-- on my stomach until dry 62 KB JPG >wake up the next morning >usually have acne on my torso >I don't this morning >wotmate.stl >c-- is good for your skin >start doing it regularly >acne gone >few weeks later realize what I'm doing >realize that I'm an autist that rubs c-- on himself >mfw No.796451665

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anon got wasted | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/27/22(Fri)15:37:49 No.878953191 IMG_20220527_103051.jpg 1.48 MB JPG >started this c-- jar from when i first discovered 4chan >fill it religiously >looking solid after 5 months >get really wasted yesterday >wake up during the night thirsty >drink from the water jar next to my c-- jar >woke up seeing this >mfw how was your morning frens? View Thread
: Anonymous 05/27/22(Fri)15:37:49 No.878953191 IMG_20220527_103051.jpg 1.48 MB JPG >started this c-- jar from when i first discovered 4chan >fill it religiously >looking solid after 5 months >get really wasted yesterday >wake up during the night thirsty >drink from the water jar next to my c-- jar >woke up seeing this >mfw how was your morning frens? View Thread

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Anon talks about the confederacy | /r/Greentext

* * **** *** 94 KB PNG >enslave people >other states decide it's wrong >"hey yall should stop that s---" >"MUH STATE RIGHTS!!!!" >secede >fight 1 war >lose
* * **** *** 94 KB PNG >enslave people >other states decide it's wrong >"hey yall should stop that s---" >"MUH STATE RIGHTS!!!!" >secede >fight 1 war >lose

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Anon becomes an legend | /r/Greentext

04/12/21(Mon)16:59:08 No.63187112 : Anonymous >>63183798 (OP) # >sophomore year >sitting in geography class nothing special >try to let out a fart >for some reason all the muscles in my anus decide to call it quits for the day >torrent of rancid and burning diarrhea flows from my ass >literally cannot stop it >the stench is so potent people have to leave the classroom >school has to call an ambulance for me it was so bad >turns out some of the chicken in the cafeteria was undercooked and it adamantly disagreed with my stomach >take week off of school and dread going back because ill forever be know as the guy who s--- his pants >come back to find the classroom is still off limits because they had to recarpet the entire thing and replace some of the drywall >since it was spring the class was held outside until the room was done >classmates treat me like a legend for having such toxic s--- I got an entire room remodeled and getting class in the fresh air Could have went worse I guess
04/12/21(Mon)16:59:08 No.63187112 : Anonymous >>63183798 (OP) # >sophomore year >sitting in geography class nothing special >try to let out a fart >for some reason all the muscles in my anus decide to call it quits for the day >torrent of rancid and burning diarrhea flows from my ass >literally cannot stop it >the stench is so potent people have to leave the classroom >school has to call an ambulance for me it was so bad >turns out some of the chicken in the cafeteria was undercooked and it adamantly disagreed with my stomach >take week off of school and dread going back because ill forever be know as the guy who s--- his pants >come back to find the classroom is still off limits because they had to recarpet the entire thing and replace some of the drywall >since it was spring the class was held outside until the room was done >classmates treat me like a legend for having such toxic s--- I got an entire room remodeled and getting class in the fresh air Could have went worse I guess

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anon lives in brazil | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: +kjCKehh) >Live in Brazil >there are no schools >there are no movie theaters >there are no malls >still get shot 39 KB JPG >>52856936 # >>52857008 # >>52857059 # >>52857158 # 10/01/15(Thu)14:33:21 No.52856597
: Anonymous (ID: +kjCKehh) >Live in Brazil >there are no schools >there are no movie theaters >there are no malls >still get shot 39 KB JPG >>52856936 # >>52857008 # >>52857059 # >>52857158 # 10/01/15(Thu)14:33:21 No.52856597

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Anon cuts people. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/01/18(Sat)11:58. >be me >surgeon >35 hour operation >do it perfectly with no mistakes everyone thanks god
Anonymous 09/01/18(Sat)11:58. >be me >surgeon >35 hour operation >do it perfectly with no mistakes everyone thanks god

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Me when the when | /r/Greentext

ttom] jpg (18 KB, 389x389) 1 [Update] [ Auto] Anonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.
ttom] jpg (18 KB, 389x389) 1 [Update] [ Auto] Anonymous 05/ >have "problem" >don't care >have no problem Life is literally so easy.

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Anon is in a ERP DND server | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/03/21(Sun)18:08:32 >friend wants me to be wingman for him in some weird ERP DnD inspired discord server >tell him im not really into DnD so dont know a f------ thing 105 KB JPG >tells me not to worry i'll have a 'fun' time >the discord server is suppose to be in a inn for weary adventurers >have to tell everyone name, race & class >im vizathar, human sorcerer >friend seems to be having a good time >i just s--- there doing other s--- >get message from a female bartender half elf >'hello mighty sorcerer, would you like to lay with me in thy bed?' >'afraid i cant stunning wench' >'but why not master of the arcane arts?' >'herpitus haveitus' >mfw i get banned from server Told him i didnt know s--- No.843900872
: Anonymous 01/03/21(Sun)18:08:32 >friend wants me to be wingman for him in some weird ERP DnD inspired discord server >tell him im not really into DnD so dont know a f------ thing 105 KB JPG >tells me not to worry i'll have a 'fun' time >the discord server is suppose to be in a inn for weary adventurers >have to tell everyone name, race & class >im vizathar, human sorcerer >friend seems to be having a good time >i just s--- there doing other s--- >get message from a female bartender half elf >'hello mighty sorcerer, would you like to lay with me in thy bed?' >'afraid i cant stunning wench' >'but why not master of the arcane arts?' >'herpitus haveitus' >mfw i get banned from server Told him i didnt know s--- No.843900872

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Anon goes to school online | /r/Greentext

/b/ Anonymous 11/05/20(Thu)23:58:05 No.839380552 (first greentext btw) >be me >in online school >usually when I'm on the phone and I have to fart I mute my mic do my business and then unmute 19 KB JPG >in online school we are muted the entire time >have to fart >already muted >unmute my mic, let out the Hiroshima of farts, 11 seconds at the least >mute my mic >my teacher starts laughing >mfw how the f--- do I join back class after this
/b/ Anonymous 11/05/20(Thu)23:58:05 No.839380552 (first greentext btw) >be me >in online school >usually when I'm on the phone and I have to fart I mute my mic do my business and then unmute 19 KB JPG >in online school we are muted the entire time >have to fart >already muted >unmute my mic, let out the Hiroshima of farts, 11 seconds at the least >mute my mic >my teacher starts laughing >mfw how the f--- do I join back class after this

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Anon is waiting | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 65 KB JPG 2 Replies 06/18/22(Sat)01:38:41 No.69088430 View Thread >day 9000 something >no big booty latina gf >depression continues
Anonymous 65 KB JPG 2 Replies 06/18/22(Sat)01:38:41 No.69088430 View Thread >day 9000 something >no big booty latina gf >depression continues

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Anon encounters a normie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous -- 507 KB PNG F------ STOP 05/05/18(Sat)14:40:21 No.767701466 >browsing 4chan >reading greentext >random kid looks over my shoulder >sees that f------ wojak feels guy > "oh lol its a troll face"
: Anonymous -- 507 KB PNG F------ STOP 05/05/18(Sat)14:40:21 No.767701466 >browsing 4chan >reading greentext >random kid looks over my shoulder >sees that f------ wojak feels guy > "oh lol its a troll face"

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Anon Plays Dodgeball | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/18/22(Sat) 09:54:28 No.69090799 >Be me >Be in gym class >Teacher announces that we're playing a new game of dodgeball 15 KB PNG >game is basically the same, but if you get hit, you get shot >everyone doesn't want to play >teacher forces us to >game starts >immediately get hit by some 6'7" chad >Teacher pulls out a gun and shoots me >everyone laughs F--- gym class.
: Anonymous 06/18/22(Sat) 09:54:28 No.69090799 >Be me >Be in gym class >Teacher announces that we're playing a new game of dodgeball 15 KB PNG >game is basically the same, but if you get hit, you get shot >everyone doesn't want to play >teacher forces us to >game starts >immediately get hit by some 6'7" chad >Teacher pulls out a gun and shoots me >everyone laughs F--- gym class.

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Anon finally gets a gf | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/22(Fri)01:58:08 No.26706250 >Finally get a gf >She wants to eat out multiple times a week >Go shopping for clothes, perfumes, and cute sunglasses then eat lunch at café once a month 286 KB JPG >Travel to expensive southern destinations during the summer >Road trips every weekend Jesus christ this is expensive as f---, how do most guys afford this??
: Anonymous 06/17/22(Fri)01:58:08 No.26706250 >Finally get a gf >She wants to eat out multiple times a week >Go shopping for clothes, perfumes, and cute sunglasses then eat lunch at café once a month 286 KB JPG >Travel to expensive southern destinations during the summer >Road trips every weekend Jesus christ this is expensive as f---, how do most guys afford this??

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Religious Anon spitting facts | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 5zHehz6R) 01/02/22(Sun)12:49:05 No.354684737 50 KB PNG >Atheists are mentally ill!! The universe was created in six days by a desert genie, who was the father of a Jewish carpenter, who was born of a virgin and spent his time turning water into wine and walking on the surface of sea until he was crucified by an angry mob in order to save mankind from some vague, nebulous concept known as "sin" which is present in all of mankind because a full grown woman, who was a few days old and made out of a rib, was tricked by a talking snake into eating a cursed piece of fruit from a forbidden tree!! >>354685012 #
: Anonymous (ID: 5zHehz6R) 01/02/22(Sun)12:49:05 No.354684737 50 KB PNG >Atheists are mentally ill!! The universe was created in six days by a desert genie, who was the father of a Jewish carpenter, who was born of a virgin and spent his time turning water into wine and walking on the surface of sea until he was crucified by an angry mob in order to save mankind from some vague, nebulous concept known as "sin" which is present in all of mankind because a full grown woman, who was a few days old and made out of a rib, was tricked by a talking snake into eating a cursed piece of fruit from a forbidden tree!! >>354685012 #

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Anon hates gatekeepers | /r/Greentext

06/18/22(Sat)09:07:51 No.69086682 why is everyone such a pretentious f----- about hobbies now? it's so f------ horrible >say i like drinking a beer or something >pffft that's not a REAL beer you need the belgian hoppy $12 IPA craft beer >no thank you i just like the s--- i can grab : Anonymous 53 KB JPG at the store and i'm cool >NO YOU F------ NEEEEEEED TO BUY THE OVERPRICED IPA THAT TASTES HORRIBLE JUST BECAUSE OKAY?!?! DOWNVOTED >say i like video games or something >PFFFT you need a $2000 gaming pc with an RTX 5090 and inner cooling >no i like how i can carry my switch my around and i have a console i'm okay with >N0000000000 you need a gaming pc with a new gpu and cpu from ryzen tech for the extra 20% of graphix dood >say i like a casual video game >that's not a real game f-- you need to play the new indie steam bull s--- and elden ring bro it's like totally HARD and stuff >no this game is free and fun i'm fine thank you >NOOOOO YOU NEED TO PLAY THIS GAME ITS THE NEW THING AND GETS THE MOST POSITIVE COMMENTS WHEN I TALK ABOUT IT CONSUME >say i like iphone instead of android >LOL DUDE ANDROID GOT THAT FEATURE 10 YEARS AGO DUDE BRO LOL F------ IDIOT >thats okay i don't care about that feature i just like being able to turn on my phone and use it >NOOOOO YOU NEED THE NEW GALAXY S12 24 FOLD Z
06/18/22(Sat)09:07:51 No.69086682 why is everyone such a pretentious f----- about hobbies now? it's so f------ horrible >say i like drinking a beer or something >pffft that's not a REAL beer you need the belgian hoppy $12 IPA craft beer >no thank you i just like the s--- i can grab : Anonymous 53 KB JPG at the store and i'm cool >NO YOU F------ NEEEEEEED TO BUY THE OVERPRICED IPA THAT TASTES HORRIBLE JUST BECAUSE OKAY?!?! DOWNVOTED >say i like video games or something >PFFFT you need a $2000 gaming pc with an RTX 5090 and inner cooling >no i like how i can carry my switch my around and i have a console i'm okay with >N0000000000 you need a gaming pc with a new gpu and cpu from ryzen tech for the extra 20% of graphix dood >say i like a casual video game >that's not a real game f-- you need to play the new indie steam bull s--- and elden ring bro it's like totally HARD and stuff >no this game is free and fun i'm fine thank you >NOOOOO YOU NEED TO PLAY THIS GAME ITS THE NEW THING AND GETS THE MOST POSITIVE COMMENTS WHEN I TALK ABOUT IT CONSUME >say i like iphone instead of android >LOL DUDE ANDROID GOT THAT FEATURE 10 YEARS AGO DUDE BRO LOL F------ IDIOT >thats okay i don't care about that feature i just like being able to turn on my phone and use it >NOOOOO YOU NEED THE NEW GALAXY S12 24 FOLD Z

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Anon lives with older sister | /r/Greentext

10/14/18(Sun)12:39:16 No.48693227 : Anonymous >be me, living with older sister >she's the one who's usually cooking >she's a terrible cook >I barely know how to make a sandwich so we've got no options >one day get into a fight and I tell her that her food is disgusting 8 KB JPG >"if you don't like my food then you can eat my p----" >go into my room >hottest fapping session of my life also, how do I apologize to her? She's the main source of income and the only one who does housework and laundry while I just sit at my computer all day. She could go out and f--- with Chad all day yet she'd rather provide me shelter. How could I return her favor?
10/14/18(Sun)12:39:16 No.48693227 : Anonymous >be me, living with older sister >she's the one who's usually cooking >she's a terrible cook >I barely know how to make a sandwich so we've got no options >one day get into a fight and I tell her that her food is disgusting 8 KB JPG >"if you don't like my food then you can eat my p----" >go into my room >hottest fapping session of my life also, how do I apologize to her? She's the main source of income and the only one who does housework and laundry while I just sit at my computer all day. She could go out and f--- with Chad all day yet she'd rather provide me shelter. How could I return her favor?

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Anon is home | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/02/19(Sat)07:17:04 No.793960993 > be 14 y/o me > find 4chan > everyone calls each other autistic and gay > "this is stupid" > leave 4chan 137 KB PNG > ffw 3 years > realize I'm gay > ffw another year > get diagnosed with autism > mfw > I'm home bois
: Anonymous 03/02/19(Sat)07:17:04 No.793960993 > be 14 y/o me > find 4chan > everyone calls each other autistic and gay > "this is stupid" > leave 4chan 137 KB PNG > ffw 3 years > realize I'm gay > ffw another year > get diagnosed with autism > mfw > I'm home bois

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