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Anon is planning an insurrection. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 66 KB JPG 2 Replies 08/11/22(Thu)01:34:08 No.69764070 >If we cant solve our problems we must DESTROY our problems One day incels will realise their true strength and numbers and will overthrow this oppressive feminist system. Start envisioning a world where WOMEN FEAR YOU View Thread Anonymous 08/11/22(Thu)01:36:40 No.69764105 What are you some kind of batman villain, anon? Anonymous >>69764070 (OP) # lol I love that point where incels go so far off the deep end they start sounding like insurrectionary communists. 08/11/22(Thu)01:38:43 No.69764123
Anonymous 66 KB JPG 2 Replies 08/11/22(Thu)01:34:08 No.69764070 >If we cant solve our problems we must DESTROY our problems One day incels will realise their true strength and numbers and will overthrow this oppressive feminist system. Start envisioning a world where WOMEN FEAR YOU View Thread Anonymous 08/11/22(Thu)01:36:40 No.69764105 What are you some kind of batman villain, anon? Anonymous >>69764070 (OP) # lol I love that point where incels go so far off the deep end they start sounding like insurrectionary communists. 08/11/22(Thu)01:38:43 No.69764123

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Anon fights against female temptations | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 438 KB JPG 1 Reply / 1 Image : Anonymous 20 KB JPG 08/11/22(Thu)03:54:53 No.883672270 I really need a man. Can I sleep in your bed anon? ...with you? I'm drunk and stoned and I thought we could cuddle maybe... I want you closer to me. View Thread 08/11/22(Thu)03:57:11 No.883672368 >>883672270 (OP) # F--- OFF BITCH IM TRYING TO SLEEP
: Anonymous 438 KB JPG 1 Reply / 1 Image : Anonymous 20 KB JPG 08/11/22(Thu)03:54:53 No.883672270 I really need a man. Can I sleep in your bed anon? ...with you? I'm drunk and stoned and I thought we could cuddle maybe... I want you closer to me. View Thread 08/11/22(Thu)03:57:11 No.883672368 >>883672270 (OP) # F--- OFF BITCH IM TRYING TO SLEEP

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Anon's mind is a temple | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 216 KB PNG 4 Replies 06/17/22 (Fri)15:32:52 No.880295634 I'm never going to look at p---, play League of Legends, eat junk food, or use social media ever again. My mind is a temple not to be contaminated with such meaningless, unhealthy things. View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/22 (Fri)15:36:22 No.880295728 >'m never going to look at p---, play League of Legends, eat junk food, or use social media ever again. My mind is a temple not to be contaminated with such meaningless, unhealthy things. >immediately posts on 4chan
: Anonymous 216 KB PNG 4 Replies 06/17/22 (Fri)15:32:52 No.880295634 I'm never going to look at p---, play League of Legends, eat junk food, or use social media ever again. My mind is a temple not to be contaminated with such meaningless, unhealthy things. View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/22 (Fri)15:36:22 No.880295728 >'m never going to look at p---, play League of Legends, eat junk food, or use social media ever again. My mind is a temple not to be contaminated with such meaningless, unhealthy things. >immediately posts on 4chan

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Anon quotes American Psycho | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Favorite movie lines 10/04/20(Sun)15:07:39 No.140245384 161AA42A-EDA1-4F0D-832B-B18023B797D1.jpg 50 KB JPG >Patrick, it's you!! You're the American Psycho?!!" : Anonymous >>140245384 (OP) # He didn't say that. 10/04/20(Sun)15:08:00 No.140245402 >>140245447 # >>140245550 # >>140245578 # >>140245615 # >>140247082 # >>140247322 # >>140247340 # >>140248981 # >>140250088 # >>140250383 # >>140251549 # >>140251745 #
: Anonymous Favorite movie lines 10/04/20(Sun)15:07:39 No.140245384 161AA42A-EDA1-4F0D-832B-B18023B797D1.jpg 50 KB JPG >Patrick, it's you!! You're the American Psycho?!!" : Anonymous >>140245384 (OP) # He didn't say that. 10/04/20(Sun)15:08:00 No.140245402 >>140245447 # >>140245550 # >>140245578 # >>140245615 # >>140247082 # >>140247322 # >>140247340 # >>140248981 # >>140250088 # >>140250383 # >>140251549 # >>140251745 #

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Anon gets mugged | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Be me 115 KB JPG instead 10/14/19(Mon)03:30:02 No.42892771 >walking home one night >Mugger comes out of nowhere >"Give me your wallet!" >Unload my FN Five-seveN on him >Realize that I used 20 rounds of 5.7*28mm ammo MFW it would have been cheaper to just hand over the wallet
Anonymous Be me 115 KB JPG instead 10/14/19(Mon)03:30:02 No.42892771 >walking home one night >Mugger comes out of nowhere >"Give me your wallet!" >Unload my FN Five-seveN on him >Realize that I used 20 rounds of 5.7*28mm ammo MFW it would have been cheaper to just hand over the wallet

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Anon eavesdrops | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12 KB PNG Anonymous 08/10/22 (Wed)19:44:32 No.69752816 >dad is having loud sex with mom again 08/10/22(Wed)19:45:16 No.69752820 Probably sick of you living at home. : Anonymous >>69752816 (OP) # join them, problem solved 08/10/22(Wed)20:01:17 No.69752914
Anonymous 12 KB PNG Anonymous 08/10/22 (Wed)19:44:32 No.69752816 >dad is having loud sex with mom again 08/10/22(Wed)19:45:16 No.69752820 Probably sick of you living at home. : Anonymous >>69752816 (OP) # join them, problem solved 08/10/22(Wed)20:01:17 No.69752914

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Tharr she blows | /r/Greentext

ile: image.jpg (16 KB, 409x307) Anonymous (ID: yayTxwp3) 05/19/14(Mon)01:31:58 Worst sex story thread? >Be me >Just graduated >Hanging out with qt3.14 girlfriend after Graduation party >Both extremely drunk >On my bed >She starts rubbing my c--- through my jeans >Says that she's never role played and wants to try >"O-okay what do you want to do?" >"I've always wanted to f--- Jack Sparrow" >Wat.jpg >Only thing I have pirate related is an eyepatch and a pirate hat from a few halloweens ago >Letsdothis.avi >She starts sucking me off >in the spurr of the moment shout "THARR SHE BLOWS!" >Realize what I just said >She starts laughing and ends up gagging on my d--- and puking >C-- because she was deepthroating when it happened >Dad walks in >Mixture of c-- and puke all over bed > Look at dad and say "A-ahoy matey" >He backs out and closes my door >Pretty sure he ran after closing the door >Never looks me in the eye again >Mfw >"Hey anon do you...." >Stares at the horrific scene that has just happend
ile: image.jpg (16 KB, 409x307) Anonymous (ID: yayTxwp3) 05/19/14(Mon)01:31:58 Worst sex story thread? >Be me >Just graduated >Hanging out with qt3.14 girlfriend after Graduation party >Both extremely drunk >On my bed >She starts rubbing my c--- through my jeans >Says that she's never role played and wants to try >"O-okay what do you want to do?" >"I've always wanted to f--- Jack Sparrow" >Wat.jpg >Only thing I have pirate related is an eyepatch and a pirate hat from a few halloweens ago >Letsdothis.avi >She starts sucking me off >in the spurr of the moment shout "THARR SHE BLOWS!" >Realize what I just said >She starts laughing and ends up gagging on my d--- and puking >C-- because she was deepthroating when it happened >Dad walks in >Mixture of c-- and puke all over bed > Look at dad and say "A-ahoy matey" >He backs out and closes my door >Pretty sure he ran after closing the door >Never looks me in the eye again >Mfw >"Hey anon do you...." >Stares at the horrific scene that has just happend

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Anon's a time traveler | /r/Greentext

58m (8/10 9:10) 69754456 2 Re1 Img PNG 848KB (1797 × 2086) >YEAR: 2040 >healthcare advances have essentially eradicated all obesity-related health problems, without eradicating obesity >90% of women, aged 18 to 25, have a BMI over 40 >99% have a BMI over 30 >any woman with a BMI under 25 is considered a statistical anomaly, and they are most often institutionalized to treat their anorexia Are you looking forward to this era?
58m (8/10 9:10) 69754456 2 Re1 Img PNG 848KB (1797 × 2086) >YEAR: 2040 >healthcare advances have essentially eradicated all obesity-related health problems, without eradicating obesity >90% of women, aged 18 to 25, have a BMI over 40 >99% have a BMI over 30 >any woman with a BMI under 25 is considered a statistical anomaly, and they are most often institutionalized to treat their anorexia Are you looking forward to this era?

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Anon has a question | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 232 KB JPG 08/11/22(Thu)10:24:37 No.54738401 Congratulations! You are a hotshot movie director with a storied history. The US Army has reached out to you because they want a movie that does for tanks what Top Gun did for aviation. Who do you cast? What is the mission? What time period and vehicles do you choose? The US Army is okay splitting its screen time with the tank of another NATO ally so long as an American crew is the protagonist and the American vehicle takes up the large majority of the screentime. You have a fuckhuge budget; the Army gives no f---- and will supply you with as much fuel and ammunition as you need to shoot your film. 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
Anonymous 232 KB JPG 08/11/22(Thu)10:24:37 No.54738401 Congratulations! You are a hotshot movie director with a storied history. The US Army has reached out to you because they want a movie that does for tanks what Top Gun did for aviation. Who do you cast? What is the mission? What time period and vehicles do you choose? The US Army is okay splitting its screen time with the tank of another NATO ally so long as an American crew is the protagonist and the American vehicle takes up the large majority of the screentime. You have a fuckhuge budget; the Army gives no f---- and will supply you with as much fuel and ammunition as you need to shoot your film. 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Beavis and Butthead in: Silent Hill 3 | /r/Greentext

file.png 1007 KB PNG >uhh, this mall sucks >hhhuhuh yeah, this sucks. i want nachos. >hey ask that girl over there if she like knows where the food is >uhhhhhhhuhuhu >hey baby
file.png 1007 KB PNG >uhh, this mall sucks >hhhuhuh yeah, this sucks. i want nachos. >hey ask that girl over there if she like knows where the food is >uhhhhhhhuhuhu >hey baby

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Pronouns company 08/08/22(Mon)22:10:32 No.88058822 I'm an europoor. I've been contacted by a murican tech company that uses "pronouns" in the mail signature. Can some burger anon explain what they are for? Also why are there two? (e.g.: "he/him"). Isn't the second one implied in the first, or is it possible to mix them (e.g.: "he/her"). 16 KB JPG Finally, how common is this in american tech companies? Would this particular company that contacted me be more globohomo than the average? 08/08/22(Mon) 22:13:32 No.88058857 : Anonymous >>88058822 (OP) # Use the european pronoun Euro/pean
: Anonymous Pronouns company 08/08/22(Mon)22:10:32 No.88058822 I'm an europoor. I've been contacted by a murican tech company that uses "pronouns" in the mail signature. Can some burger anon explain what they are for? Also why are there two? (e.g.: "he/him"). Isn't the second one implied in the first, or is it possible to mix them (e.g.: "he/her"). 16 KB JPG Finally, how common is this in american tech companies? Would this particular company that contacted me be more globohomo than the average? 08/08/22(Mon) 22:13:32 No.88058857 : Anonymous >>88058822 (OP) # Use the european pronoun Euro/pean

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Anon lives in a double standard society | /r/Greentext

09/30/18(Sun)09:23:11 No.47829822 >>47829862 >>47829884 >>47829907 >>47829939 >>47829951 >>47829956 >>47829960 >>47830118 >>47830125 >>47830163 >>47830168 >>47830182 >>47830452 >>47830501 >>47830536 >>47830601 >>47830697 >>47830737 >>47830847 >>47830857 >>47831328 >>47832066 >>47832229 >>47832302 >>47832353 >>47832354 >>47832513 >>47832696 >>47833199 >>47833530 >>47833818 >>47833850 >>47834179 >>47834587 >>47834632 >female coworker makes a joke at my expense about something I can't control (being bald) >I make a joke back about something she can control (being fat) >she goes home early and everybody is mad at me How was I the bad guy here? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:56:06 No.47830163 ► >>47830238 >>47829822 (OP) # What was her joke? And what did you answer? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)10:06:34 No.47830238 ► >>47830163 # >broke up with gf a few weeks ago (I ended it) >coworkers were talking about their exes (working with women is Hell) >>Anon, why don't you ever talk s--- about your ex? Didn't she break up with you because you were bald ha ha? >Ha ha, good one. Didn't you have a miscarriage because you're so fat?
09/30/18(Sun)09:23:11 No.47829822 >>47829862 >>47829884 >>47829907 >>47829939 >>47829951 >>47829956 >>47829960 >>47830118 >>47830125 >>47830163 >>47830168 >>47830182 >>47830452 >>47830501 >>47830536 >>47830601 >>47830697 >>47830737 >>47830847 >>47830857 >>47831328 >>47832066 >>47832229 >>47832302 >>47832353 >>47832354 >>47832513 >>47832696 >>47833199 >>47833530 >>47833818 >>47833850 >>47834179 >>47834587 >>47834632 >female coworker makes a joke at my expense about something I can't control (being bald) >I make a joke back about something she can control (being fat) >she goes home early and everybody is mad at me How was I the bad guy here? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)09:56:06 No.47830163 ► >>47830238 >>47829822 (OP) # What was her joke? And what did you answer? Anonymous 09/30/18(Sun)10:06:34 No.47830238 ► >>47830163 # >broke up with gf a few weeks ago (I ended it) >coworkers were talking about their exes (working with women is Hell) >>Anon, why don't you ever talk s--- about your ex? Didn't she break up with you because you were bald ha ha? >Ha ha, good one. Didn't you have a miscarriage because you're so fat?

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Juanonjuanon | /r/Greentext


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Yankeesyankees | /r/Greentext

>be today >be Australian 9 KB PNG >Woke up sick >Call work to let them know I can't come in >"Yeahnoworries.mate" >contact local GP >Appointment free and same day because subsidised social healthcare >Paid sick leave because strong labour movement that guarantees working rights >Now nobody at work will catch my cold. >Food for customers not contaminated by my cold. >Company doesn't lose money because my sick leave is government subsidised >All bills continue to be paid on time, my day is stress-free because I have time to relax and recover. Today is yet another day I'm glad I'm not an American.
>be today >be Australian 9 KB PNG >Woke up sick >Call work to let them know I can't come in >"Yeahnoworries.mate" >contact local GP >Appointment free and same day because subsidised social healthcare >Paid sick leave because strong labour movement that guarantees working rights >Now nobody at work will catch my cold. >Food for customers not contaminated by my cold. >Company doesn't lose money because my sick leave is government subsidised >All bills continue to be paid on time, my day is stress-free because I have time to relax and recover. Today is yet another day I'm glad I'm not an American.

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Candy Eugenics | /r/Greentext

File:1192563983.jpg-(26 KB, 400x300) Anonymous 10/16/07(Tue)15:46:23 No. 42979025 [Reply] Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack. I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading. "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes." This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.
File:1192563983.jpg-(26 KB, 400x300) Anonymous 10/16/07(Tue)15:46:23 No. 42979025 [Reply] Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels. Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round. I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world. Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment. When I reach the end of the pack. I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3x5 card reading. "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes." This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion. There can be only one.

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Touch of a woman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 939 KB GIF 08/10/22(Wed)16:44:23 No.69755059 >Be me >Hate Women >Go to Mcdonald's to order some tendies >Cashier is a stacy, must probably f----- a lot guys in high school now she hit the wall now she has to support a kid who's father is unidentified lol >Cashier gives me a smile and shows me a bit of kindness with the most softest calm voice >Literally break down in the middle of my order. >It's like my hate has just been lifted by an angel >Why am I like this?
: Anonymous 939 KB GIF 08/10/22(Wed)16:44:23 No.69755059 >Be me >Hate Women >Go to Mcdonald's to order some tendies >Cashier is a stacy, must probably f----- a lot guys in high school now she hit the wall now she has to support a kid who's father is unidentified lol >Cashier gives me a smile and shows me a bit of kindness with the most softest calm voice >Literally break down in the middle of my order. >It's like my hate has just been lifted by an angel >Why am I like this?

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