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Anon has finally made it. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 52353826 1,5 MB JPG >have cute cardiobunny neighbour >she asks me if we can go running together >women running outside have been r---- and killed in our city, so she wants to take me with her for protection >we have been doing this once a week for a year, getting take out food afterwards Have I made it, /fit/? 34 REPLIES 63 IMAGES 21 REPLIES Anonymous | 52353835 leri why haven't you r---- and killed her yet? REPLY leri ...
Anonymous | 52353826 1,5 MB JPG >have cute cardiobunny neighbour >she asks me if we can go running together >women running outside have been r---- and killed in our city, so she wants to take me with her for protection >we have been doing this once a week for a year, getting take out food afterwards Have I made it, /fit/? 34 REPLIES 63 IMAGES 21 REPLIES Anonymous | 52353835 leri why haven't you r---- and killed her yet? REPLY leri ...

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Anon slaps a girl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous here we go 34 KB JPG >3rd grade >grew up with dad, had an absentee mom >Told me to hit people back if they hit me first, didn't tell me it doesn't apply to girls >in class, a roastie talks s--- to me for no reason >politely told her to stop, kept talking s---. >she eventually shoves me >whothefuckisthisbitch >slam one on her face >flies across the room, knocked unconscious with her skull cracked and starting to bleed >class runs away in fear of me >principal comes down >screams at me and calls the cops >got fired later that day >f--- 4
: Anonymous here we go 34 KB JPG >3rd grade >grew up with dad, had an absentee mom >Told me to hit people back if they hit me first, didn't tell me it doesn't apply to girls >in class, a roastie talks s--- to me for no reason >politely told her to stop, kept talking s---. >she eventually shoves me >whothefuckisthisbitch >slam one on her face >flies across the room, knocked unconscious with her skull cracked and starting to bleed >class runs away in fear of me >principal comes down >screams at me and calls the cops >got fired later that day >f--- 4

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Anon has one chance | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12 KB JPG 03/31/19(Sun)02:40:30 No.796269811 >be me >one chance at life >filipino
Anonymous 12 KB JPG 03/31/19(Sun)02:40:30 No.796269811 >be me >one chance at life >filipino

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It's a challenge | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 10 KB JPG Anonymous 114 KB PNG 06/05/19(Wed)17:57:40 No.52771831 >Life going unusually well lately >Check engine light comes on 06/05/19(Wed)18:01:50 No.52771891 >>52771831 (OP) # >>52772118 # >>52772175 # >>52772688 # >>52772696 # >>52772722 # >>52773112 # >>52773312 # >>52773328 # >>52773372 # >>52773532 #
: Anonymous 10 KB JPG Anonymous 114 KB PNG 06/05/19(Wed)17:57:40 No.52771831 >Life going unusually well lately >Check engine light comes on 06/05/19(Wed)18:01:50 No.52771891 >>52771831 (OP) # >>52772118 # >>52772175 # >>52772688 # >>52772696 # >>52772722 # >>52773112 # >>52773312 # >>52773328 # >>52773372 # >>52773532 #

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Anon has a very cool lunch box | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat) 19:16:44 No.73392987 >be me >collegefag >hanging out on campus >some a------ with his friends makes fun of me for my transformers lunch box >after he leaves i find his student ID on the ground >use it to print solid black pages front and back in the computer lab i love my lunch box
Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat) 19:16:44 No.73392987 >be me >collegefag >hanging out on campus >some a------ with his friends makes fun of me for my transformers lunch box >after he leaves i find his student ID on the ground >use it to print solid black pages front and back in the computer lab i love my lunch box

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Can someone make anon feel less sad? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/09/18(Mon)10:38:54 No.44540287 > be middle school loner with no friends > close to summer holidays > all students were told to read the book > having nothing better to do, read it 45 KB JPG > because school is inviting the obscure author of the book > he was the guest speaker during assembly > principal asks the school about what we thought of his book and questions about it > quiet, awkward silence > people were muttering nobody read it > felt bad for the author > told the author I enjoyed it and answered the questions > one question after another, only I answered > author was happy that I knew about the details > school staff felt less embarassed > after assembly classmates started to make fun of me > called kiss ass and book worm etc. > got the nickname ass-worm for the rest of the middle school mfw made an obscure author proud of his work in exchange of my dignity in middle school
: Anonymous 04/09/18(Mon)10:38:54 No.44540287 > be middle school loner with no friends > close to summer holidays > all students were told to read the book > having nothing better to do, read it 45 KB JPG > because school is inviting the obscure author of the book > he was the guest speaker during assembly > principal asks the school about what we thought of his book and questions about it > quiet, awkward silence > people were muttering nobody read it > felt bad for the author > told the author I enjoyed it and answered the questions > one question after another, only I answered > author was happy that I knew about the details > school staff felt less embarassed > after assembly classmates started to make fun of me > called kiss ass and book worm etc. > got the nickname ass-worm for the rest of the middle school mfw made an obscure author proud of his work in exchange of my dignity in middle school

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Anon is ungrateful | /r/Greentext

Board /lgbt/ - LGBT [Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: 75799850-5B9B-4A5A-9B5D-7(...).jpg (26 KB, 300x400) NA >>31068136 Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:18:51 No.31064469 >>31064477 >>31064481 >>31064513 >>31065883 >>31068080 Settings Mobile Home 37/1/16/9 >parents found my injections earlier this week >they didn't really say anything and have been acting the same >except every other day they ask me if i want to transition and urge me to see a doctor and ease off diy i want to kms Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:19:41 No.31064477 ► >>31064499 >>31064469 (OP) # shut the f--- up humble bragger Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:19:53 No.31064479 >parents find hrt >are supportive kys. when i came out to my dad he told me not to transition or he'd kick me out. lucky little s---.
Board /lgbt/ - LGBT [Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: 75799850-5B9B-4A5A-9B5D-7(...).jpg (26 KB, 300x400) NA >>31068136 Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:18:51 No.31064469 >>31064477 >>31064481 >>31064513 >>31065883 >>31068080 Settings Mobile Home 37/1/16/9 >parents found my injections earlier this week >they didn't really say anything and have been acting the same >except every other day they ask me if i want to transition and urge me to see a doctor and ease off diy i want to kms Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:19:41 No.31064477 ► >>31064499 >>31064469 (OP) # shut the f--- up humble bragger Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)06:19:53 No.31064479 >parents find hrt >are supportive kys. when i came out to my dad he told me not to transition or he'd kick me out. lucky little s---.

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Anon that's just bad etiquette | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 748 KB PNG haunting 08/24/21(Tue)12:59:52 No.65114223 >be me at friends house watching lord of the rings back in 2005 >we eat dinner >suddenly his mother >"does your friend not have his own home?" >mfw
Anonymous 748 KB PNG haunting 08/24/21(Tue)12:59:52 No.65114223 >be me at friends house watching lord of the rings back in 2005 >we eat dinner >suddenly his mother >"does your friend not have his own home?" >mfw

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Anons just asking. | /r/Greentext

Anyone else use their neighbors for dry fire practice? Anyone else use their neighbor(...) 10/12/22(Wed)17:10:42 No.556
Anyone else use their neighbors for dry fire practice? Anyone else use their neighbor(...) 10/12/22(Wed)17:10:42 No.556

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Anon goes to Burger King | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)12:30:30 No.899649304 ► >Be Me >Go to Burger King >Have to poop >There is a sign on the stair leading to the toilets >"2nd floor closed" >Decide to bypass thus unholy barrier to tackle bowel evacuation >Employee shouts at me and says I am not allowed to do this >Have to go to toilet for disabled f--- >Idea.wac >S--- on floor to show this retard employee who's the alpha >Leave without buying anything, just leaving my genetically superior feces. You'll never shout at me again
Anonymous 05/21/23(Sun)12:30:30 No.899649304 ► >Be Me >Go to Burger King >Have to poop >There is a sign on the stair leading to the toilets >"2nd floor closed" >Decide to bypass thus unholy barrier to tackle bowel evacuation >Employee shouts at me and says I am not allowed to do this >Have to go to toilet for disabled f--- >Idea.wac >S--- on floor to show this retard employee who's the alpha >Leave without buying anything, just leaving my genetically superior feces. You'll never shout at me again

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Anon was the victim of a practical joke | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and realise I've been the victim 71 KB JPG of a practical joke >I am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street
Anonymous 01/13/18(Sat)09:06:41 No.10531852 >walking home at night >pass a group of youths >one of them tells me I dropped my gay card >I look down for it and realise I've been the victim 71 KB JPG of a practical joke >I am unmoved, I tell the youth that his provocations are futile because I am a stoic >he bursts out laughing and says it's pronounced stow-ic, not stoike >break down and cry in the street

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When /b/ really meant random. | /r/Greentext

File: 1252452749.jpg-(76 KB, 629x768, 1249394077592.jpg) Anonymous 09/08/09(Tue)19:32:29 No.158954336 i'll straight eat the back half a goat while the front half still breathin m----------- you skinny f------ wanna talk food lets f----- talk food you p---- bitches got my teeth cut the f--- out and replaced with teflon coated titanium bitch i got a thirteen million dollar artificial intelligence bionic swallow muscle designed by nasa that can straight push an unplucked turkey down my f----- throat f----- feet and all you f----- busters sometimes i order like three four double quarter pounders and walk out into the parking lot and just start cold whippin em at passing police cars i don't give a s--- n---- the cops know i eat taser electricity like a german n----- eat mustard that s---- like f----- parsley to me the sun don't set bitch i just get hungry at dusk >> Anonymous 09/08/09(Tue) 19:33:18 No.15895451100 File 1252452798.jpg-(48 KB, 480x315, 1240762874965.jpg) what the f--- am i reading. ROBINS Washington Urenay Lous Budere
File: 1252452749.jpg-(76 KB, 629x768, 1249394077592.jpg) Anonymous 09/08/09(Tue)19:32:29 No.158954336 i'll straight eat the back half a goat while the front half still breathin m----------- you skinny f------ wanna talk food lets f----- talk food you p---- bitches got my teeth cut the f--- out and replaced with teflon coated titanium bitch i got a thirteen million dollar artificial intelligence bionic swallow muscle designed by nasa that can straight push an unplucked turkey down my f----- throat f----- feet and all you f----- busters sometimes i order like three four double quarter pounders and walk out into the parking lot and just start cold whippin em at passing police cars i don't give a s--- n---- the cops know i eat taser electricity like a german n----- eat mustard that s---- like f----- parsley to me the sun don't set bitch i just get hungry at dusk >> Anonymous 09/08/09(Tue) 19:33:18 No.15895451100 File 1252452798.jpg-(48 KB, 480x315, 1240762874965.jpg) what the f--- am i reading. ROBINS Washington Urenay Lous Budere

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show tiddies | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: iafwLgzD) 331 KB PNG 05/21/23(Sun)14:33:47 No.427785875 >be me >mid looking femanon >create an okcupid account >spend 20 minutes filling out everything. >upload nice pictures >create profile.exe >200 likes in 30 minutes >wow.jpeg >most dudes are balding and have babyfaces. the good looking dudes aren't interested in long-term relationships (neither are the ugly ones) >dudes start to look more or less the same. >Eventually only start to care about the match score and not the faces >.... >starts to feel like dice rolls in a Tabletop game >try for 2 hours >match score 97%! >good looking >smart >doesn't want a long-term relationship >logout That's it, anons, Just wanted to demystify the female experience for you. Hope you have a nice day <3
: Anonymous (ID: iafwLgzD) 331 KB PNG 05/21/23(Sun)14:33:47 No.427785875 >be me >mid looking femanon >create an okcupid account >spend 20 minutes filling out everything. >upload nice pictures >create profile.exe >200 likes in 30 minutes >wow.jpeg >most dudes are balding and have babyfaces. the good looking dudes aren't interested in long-term relationships (neither are the ugly ones) >dudes start to look more or less the same. >Eventually only start to care about the match score and not the faces >.... >starts to feel like dice rolls in a Tabletop game >try for 2 hours >match score 97%! >good looking >smart >doesn't want a long-term relationship >logout That's it, anons, Just wanted to demystify the female experience for you. Hope you have a nice day <3

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Anon is the joker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Call me Mr. J 88 KB JPG 05/21/23(Sun)10:26:34 No.73399142 >be me >first year of college >meet some guy and introduce myself >says he wont remember my name so he is just gonna call me Mr. J >idc so I go with it >fast forward a year >I start hanging out with this girl >dude walks up to me and says howdy Mr. J >talk briefly and part ways >girl starts giggling and saying Mr. Jay >Are we gonna kill the bats Mr. Jay? >This joke forms a foundational memory in her mind >Fast forward a few months and start dating her >Still randomly calls me Mr. Jay >I'm taking her on our third date this week >It's a marvel movie, but I don't think it's gonna make a difference. tfw I'm gonna have to wear makeup while f------ her arent I : Anonymous fake thread f----- 05/21/23(Sun)10:40:14 No.73399280
: Anonymous Call me Mr. J 88 KB JPG 05/21/23(Sun)10:26:34 No.73399142 >be me >first year of college >meet some guy and introduce myself >says he wont remember my name so he is just gonna call me Mr. J >idc so I go with it >fast forward a year >I start hanging out with this girl >dude walks up to me and says howdy Mr. J >talk briefly and part ways >girl starts giggling and saying Mr. Jay >Are we gonna kill the bats Mr. Jay? >This joke forms a foundational memory in her mind >Fast forward a few months and start dating her >Still randomly calls me Mr. Jay >I'm taking her on our third date this week >It's a marvel movie, but I don't think it's gonna make a difference. tfw I'm gonna have to wear makeup while f------ her arent I : Anonymous fake thread f----- 05/21/23(Sun)10:40:14 No.73399280

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Anon lives in China | /r/Greentext

>live in China >try to prepare breakfast but one of my 7 concubines drank the last of the leaded milk >get in car >car won't start because intake is clogged with a toddler's torso >oh yeah, forgot about that >pluck it out >car is still immobilized due to several human heads jamming up the wheel as well >no time to fix it, I'm late for work >use concubine #3's bicycle >bike is broken because it's chinese just like you >f@#*! >have to walk, I guess >put on standard outdoor chinese facemask >visibility is 20 feet due to smog >best it's been all year, what a beautiful day >see neighbor lady sweeping her dead child into trash bin >again?! >she shrugs and says "china will go larger" and goes back into house >a sewer explodes, I narrowly dodge a flying manhole cover >get to train station >doors open, suffocated and smothered dead bodies pour out >oh this is the dead body train, I'll take the next one >living people train arrives >doors open, suffocated and smothered dead bodies pour out >trample over them because I'm late, dammit >driver announces "scheduled derailment in 10 seconds, please hold on" >train derails, me and some other guy in the back row survive >he waves to me with the one arm he has left and smiles >says "We will live in prosperity!" >finally get to the wilderness park where I work >take escalator up to office to clock in >plate at the top of escalator gives way, gears and torque would've eaten my left leg if I still had one >feed it my left hand instead as an offering >for China >get in car to drive a visitor and her family around tiger enclosure >remind them that one of them has to die here as per the rules of the park >daughter says it's her turn and jumps out, mom says "bull (bleep)" and jumps out after her >Tiger kills the mother but breaks its leg while trying to kill daughter due to calcium defiency >I have to apologize to the daughter: "sorry, Tiger is broken today, come back tomorrow" >China will grow larger
>live in China >try to prepare breakfast but one of my 7 concubines drank the last of the leaded milk >get in car >car won't start because intake is clogged with a toddler's torso >oh yeah, forgot about that >pluck it out >car is still immobilized due to several human heads jamming up the wheel as well >no time to fix it, I'm late for work >use concubine #3's bicycle >bike is broken because it's chinese just like you >f@#*! >have to walk, I guess >put on standard outdoor chinese facemask >visibility is 20 feet due to smog >best it's been all year, what a beautiful day >see neighbor lady sweeping her dead child into trash bin >again?! >she shrugs and says "china will go larger" and goes back into house >a sewer explodes, I narrowly dodge a flying manhole cover >get to train station >doors open, suffocated and smothered dead bodies pour out >oh this is the dead body train, I'll take the next one >living people train arrives >doors open, suffocated and smothered dead bodies pour out >trample over them because I'm late, dammit >driver announces "scheduled derailment in 10 seconds, please hold on" >train derails, me and some other guy in the back row survive >he waves to me with the one arm he has left and smiles >says "We will live in prosperity!" >finally get to the wilderness park where I work >take escalator up to office to clock in >plate at the top of escalator gives way, gears and torque would've eaten my left leg if I still had one >feed it my left hand instead as an offering >for China >get in car to drive a visitor and her family around tiger enclosure >remind them that one of them has to die here as per the rules of the park >daughter says it's her turn and jumps out, mom says "bull (bleep)" and jumps out after her >Tiger kills the mother but breaks its leg while trying to kill daughter due to calcium defiency >I have to apologize to the daughter: "sorry, Tiger is broken today, come back tomorrow" >China will grow larger

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Yurop anon illustrates life | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)12:25:33 No.899296476 >be me, europeen >live in a 400 euros/month apartment in a walkable city, have licence but don't need a car >live on junk food, nicotine and wine, stay fit by biking everywhere >sometimes go on walks through the 500-year-old cobblestones, looking at castles and historical churches just for fun >breathtakingly beautiful university girls sit at cafés and in the parks, in short skirts and heels because they like feeling pretty and none of them grew up going to church that'd tell them they can't do that >condoms are free and abortions easily accessible >they don't mind that I'm ugly as s--- for as long as I'm funny >can walk to the library whenever I please, no books are banned for displeasing religious militants >bike right past it every week on my way to a highly educated and licensed therapist whose sessions are reimbursed by free national health care system >making progress in therapy, still on sick leave with a government pension until I'm fully recovered >still a depressed p------------ with childhood trauma and an eating disorder, but at least I'm not living in some Bumfuckistan, USA
Anonymous 05/15/23(Mon)12:25:33 No.899296476 >be me, europeen >live in a 400 euros/month apartment in a walkable city, have licence but don't need a car >live on junk food, nicotine and wine, stay fit by biking everywhere >sometimes go on walks through the 500-year-old cobblestones, looking at castles and historical churches just for fun >breathtakingly beautiful university girls sit at cafés and in the parks, in short skirts and heels because they like feeling pretty and none of them grew up going to church that'd tell them they can't do that >condoms are free and abortions easily accessible >they don't mind that I'm ugly as s--- for as long as I'm funny >can walk to the library whenever I please, no books are banned for displeasing religious militants >bike right past it every week on my way to a highly educated and licensed therapist whose sessions are reimbursed by free national health care system >making progress in therapy, still on sick leave with a government pension until I'm fully recovered >still a depressed p------------ with childhood trauma and an eating disorder, but at least I'm not living in some Bumfuckistan, USA

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anon hears a noise | /r/Greentext

File: sd.jpg (12 KB, 474x219) 50 O Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)23:26:39 No.899620677 >>899622546 >*chirp!* Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)23:29:26 No.899620805 Always in the middle of the night when I'm the only one up.
File: sd.jpg (12 KB, 474x219) 50 O Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)23:26:39 No.899620677 >>899622546 >*chirp!* Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)23:29:26 No.899620805 Always in the middle of the night when I'm the only one up.

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Anon have a doll | /r/Greentext

Anonymous (ID: NQRRG5bi) 02/25/20(Tue)11:38:39 No.245243961 >>245244329 >>245244405>>245244465>>245244507 >>245244786 >>245244899 >>245245760 >>245245772 >>245246171 >>245247133 >>245249325 File: gretasexbot95.jpg (61 KB, 1024x680) >>245242014 (OP) . I spent 3400$ to commision a sexbot based on Greta. Its being constructed by a Japanese company. She will be here in 2 more months. I am going to rent her out on craiglist for 300$ a night. So hot. the best part is her voice is now programmable. I am goign to tech her to say: "Dump your carbon in me Daddy", "And I dont even have to shave it", "Stop teasing, they are NOT misquito bites", and of course when anally penetrated she will exclaim "How dare you." Also she will have her n------ pierced, and a tongue stud. This is the endgame dude. They will all be turned into Al sexbots.
Anonymous (ID: NQRRG5bi) 02/25/20(Tue)11:38:39 No.245243961 >>245244329 >>245244405>>245244465>>245244507 >>245244786 >>245244899 >>245245760 >>245245772 >>245246171 >>245247133 >>245249325 File: gretasexbot95.jpg (61 KB, 1024x680) >>245242014 (OP) . I spent 3400$ to commision a sexbot based on Greta. Its being constructed by a Japanese company. She will be here in 2 more months. I am going to rent her out on craiglist for 300$ a night. So hot. the best part is her voice is now programmable. I am goign to tech her to say: "Dump your carbon in me Daddy", "And I dont even have to shave it", "Stop teasing, they are NOT misquito bites", and of course when anally penetrated she will exclaim "How dare you." Also she will have her n------ pierced, and a tongue stud. This is the endgame dude. They will all be turned into Al sexbots.

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Can confirm it works. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous akmator: 14 KB JPG >profit 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences
Anonymous akmator: 14 KB JPG >profit 05/21/17(Sun)14:36:47 No.733287790 >go on akinator >say yes when asked if your character is a p----star >answer in accordance to what you want your p----star to look like >akinator gives you a hand-picked p----star to fit your preferences

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Anon is an online school casualty | /r/Greentext

File: 20220204_232317.jpg (59 KB, 400x415) ME DUMB AND NO KNOW HOW SPEAK Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)21:03:20 No.28982443 >Be me, 20 year old autist >Ugly as s--- for majority of my life, was kinda bullied in middle school >Have major glowup, go from a 4 to around an 8 out of 10. >Parents decide to have me put in Online School because their scared of Public Schools being violent >Online School for all of High School, never talked to anyone but my teachers and a couple guys from my Middle school >Me now, out of school but have virtually no friends and my social skills are almost non-existent outside of a small friend group >Meet cute chick I like but half the time I talk to her I start stuttering like a retard or say something autistic as f--- that I don't realize until after I say it What the f--- do I do? I feel like I missed an extremely important piece of youth by not being able to actually talk to people my age during High School. She's nice, I don't want to be a weirdo and make her uncomfortable because I literally just don't know how to talk to people.
File: 20220204_232317.jpg (59 KB, 400x415) ME DUMB AND NO KNOW HOW SPEAK Anonymous 05/20/23(Sat)21:03:20 No.28982443 >Be me, 20 year old autist >Ugly as s--- for majority of my life, was kinda bullied in middle school >Have major glowup, go from a 4 to around an 8 out of 10. >Parents decide to have me put in Online School because their scared of Public Schools being violent >Online School for all of High School, never talked to anyone but my teachers and a couple guys from my Middle school >Me now, out of school but have virtually no friends and my social skills are almost non-existent outside of a small friend group >Meet cute chick I like but half the time I talk to her I start stuttering like a retard or say something autistic as f--- that I don't realize until after I say it What the f--- do I do? I feel like I missed an extremely important piece of youth by not being able to actually talk to people my age during High School. She's nice, I don't want to be a weirdo and make her uncomfortable because I literally just don't know how to talk to people.

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