Greentext Stories - Images
leaf finally understands the purpose of mass immigration | /r/Greentext
![File: 55p3cn.png (144 KB, 400x300) All is lost ☐ Anonymous (ID: B4pyMfso) 10/25/23(Wed)13:43:43 No.446265717 ► >>446265900 >>446265910 >>446268334 >be canadian >wife is from florida >been together 7 years >she moves to live in canada with me >gets permanent residency >applies for citizenship >passes the test >today is her citizenship ceremony, which is now done over zoom ever since covid >there's something like 100 people in the in the call >take a peek at the zoom call >she's literally the only white person it's so f------ over. I don't even know what to say. There's no turning back from this.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/553/d18.png)
![File: 55p3cn.png (144 KB, 400x300) All is lost ☐ Anonymous (ID: B4pyMfso) 10/25/23(Wed)13:43:43 No.446265717 ► >>446265900 >>446265910 >>446268334 >be canadian >wife is from florida >been together 7 years >she moves to live in canada with me >gets permanent residency >applies for citizenship >passes the test >today is her citizenship ceremony, which is now done over zoom ever since covid >there's something like 100 people in the in the call >take a peek at the zoom call >she's literally the only white person it's so f------ over. I don't even know what to say. There's no turning back from this.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/553/d18.png)
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Anon likes trains | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)20:57:35 No.189120415 Fren TRAIN 307 KB PNG >go to train station on Saturday night >see all the pretty women all dressed up in nice revealing outfits >start taking pictures of them for nefarious activities later >"eww are you taking pictures of me you little creep?!" >"umm no, I was actually taking a picture of this class 158 train currently approaching the platform" >get away with it Another reason why trains are amazing.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/534/6f6.jpg)
![: Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)20:57:35 No.189120415 Fren TRAIN 307 KB PNG >go to train station on Saturday night >see all the pretty women all dressed up in nice revealing outfits >start taking pictures of them for nefarious activities later >"eww are you taking pictures of me you little creep?!" >"umm no, I was actually taking a picture of this class 158 train currently approaching the platform" >get away with it Another reason why trains are amazing.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/534/6f6.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Whoopsie Daisy | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 22 KB JPG 10/25/23(Wed)17:29:50 No.908278335 >>Be me >>Pee in tub >>Forget about it >>Go to take a shower >>Slip in piss, almost fall >>mfw](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/533/371.jpg)
![: Anonymous 22 KB JPG 10/25/23(Wed)17:29:50 No.908278335 >>Be me >>Pee in tub >>Forget about it >>Go to take a shower >>Slip in piss, almost fall >>mfw](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/533/371.jpg)
Greentext Stories
The Inevitable Star Wars Reboot | /r/Greentext
![File: l-intro-1686067436.jpg (203 KB, 1600x900) Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)23:28:41 No.191399257 >>191399280 >>191399326 >>191399473 >So yeah, THAT happened.. >So THAT was a thing.. >I guess I'm sorry for, y'know, being a d---? >Mmmyeah. You were. But it's whatevs. ☐ Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)23:32:56 No.191399326 ► >>191399372 >>191399376 File: FCBE07CC-9F1C-4202-9C59-9(...).jpg (8 KB, 195x258) ANT >>191399257 (OP) >It's not coming off. CO NATIO DIE >What?! >Yeah it's stuck. How do I get this thing off? >Push both buttons in and lift. >I am pushing both buttons in, still not coming off. I'm gonna try wiggling it. >No don't wiggle it; you'll make it worse.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/532/6bf.png)
![File: l-intro-1686067436.jpg (203 KB, 1600x900) Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)23:28:41 No.191399257 >>191399280 >>191399326 >>191399473 >So yeah, THAT happened.. >So THAT was a thing.. >I guess I'm sorry for, y'know, being a d---? >Mmmyeah. You were. But it's whatevs. ☐ Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)23:32:56 No.191399326 ► >>191399372 >>191399376 File: FCBE07CC-9F1C-4202-9C59-9(...).jpg (8 KB, 195x258) ANT >>191399257 (OP) >It's not coming off. CO NATIO DIE >What?! >Yeah it's stuck. How do I get this thing off? >Push both buttons in and lift. >I am pushing both buttons in, still not coming off. I'm gonna try wiggling it. >No don't wiggle it; you'll make it worse.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/532/6bf.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon thinks with his pp | /r/Greentext
![11 10 KB JPG >be horny >go on doublelist >find post for girl looking to suck d--- >think with pp >send her a fully nude body shot with face >she asks for more and wants to know my name >send her more and tell her my name >she then blackmails me >threatens to send pictures of me to all my family members on facebook >jokes on her >I don't have Facebook >she doesn't know >I act scared and tell her to tell me where to send the money >she gives me her cashapp >I report it to the authorities and tell her I need a few days to gather the money >they continue to threaten me by sending my photos of my linked in account >not too long after, they get caught >get call from detective >turns out it's some 23 year old dude from California](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/497/f59.jpg)
![11 10 KB JPG >be horny >go on doublelist >find post for girl looking to suck d--- >think with pp >send her a fully nude body shot with face >she asks for more and wants to know my name >send her more and tell her my name >she then blackmails me >threatens to send pictures of me to all my family members on facebook >jokes on her >I don't have Facebook >she doesn't know >I act scared and tell her to tell me where to send the money >she gives me her cashapp >I report it to the authorities and tell her I need a few days to gather the money >they continue to threaten me by sending my photos of my linked in account >not too long after, they get caught >get call from detective >turns out it's some 23 year old dude from California](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/497/f59.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon receives a message from a female co-worker | /r/Greentext
![File: empty.jpg (97 KB, 600x532) never received a message from a girl before Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)10:26:01 No.75195765 >>75195787 >>75195789 >receive message from female coworker asking whether I can cover one of her shifts >instantly imagine life together with her when does it end?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/496/940.jpg)
![File: empty.jpg (97 KB, 600x532) never received a message from a girl before Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)10:26:01 No.75195765 >>75195787 >>75195789 >receive message from female coworker asking whether I can cover one of her shifts >instantly imagine life together with her when does it end?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/496/940.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Its so over shithole bros... | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 20231020_234614.jpg 10 KB JPG 10/25/23(Wed)10:27:50 No.655285769 Steam is removing regional pricing and game prices will be based on USD from now on.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/471/f65.jpg)
![: Anonymous 20231020_234614.jpg 10 KB JPG 10/25/23(Wed)10:27:50 No.655285769 Steam is removing regional pricing and game prices will be based on USD from now on.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/471/f65.jpg)
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Anon is questioned | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)12:01:36 No.75196637 365 KB PNG >be me >have carpenter housemate who works from home >take out trash >car pull up next to me >woman asking me if I lived with the carpenter >"yes" >woman asking me if he drinks >start thinking she was insulting his work and calling him a drunk >lies >"never drunk in his life" >"you sure? He doesn't like beer, vodka?" >mfw I realised it was xmas soon and she just wanted to buy him a gift why do I immediately think the worst of people](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/470/940.png)
![: Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)12:01:36 No.75196637 365 KB PNG >be me >have carpenter housemate who works from home >take out trash >car pull up next to me >woman asking me if I lived with the carpenter >"yes" >woman asking me if he drinks >start thinking she was insulting his work and calling him a drunk >lies >"never drunk in his life" >"you sure? He doesn't like beer, vodka?" >mfw I realised it was xmas soon and she just wanted to buy him a gift why do I immediately think the worst of people](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/470/940.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon breaks up with his girlfriend | /r/Greentext
![File: tereyt.jpg (112 KB, 768x512) codependent Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)13:03:14 No.75196649 >>75196654 >gf is codependent >starts talking about wanting "guy friends" to hang out with >immediately break up and find another That's how I run things. That's how you should, too. Ignore the psychology toxic b-------. Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)13:04:09 No.75196654 >>75196649 (OP) # >immediately break up and find another codependent >Ignore the psychology toxic b------- Imao](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/469/7c3.jpg)
![File: tereyt.jpg (112 KB, 768x512) codependent Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)13:03:14 No.75196649 >>75196654 >gf is codependent >starts talking about wanting "guy friends" to hang out with >immediately break up and find another That's how I run things. That's how you should, too. Ignore the psychology toxic b-------. Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)13:04:09 No.75196654 >>75196649 (OP) # >immediately break up and find another codependent >Ignore the psychology toxic b------- Imao](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/469/7c3.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon has a purpose | /r/Greentext
![: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 10 Replies / 3 Images : Anonymous 8) 63 KB JPG 10/26/23(Thu)11:58:20 No.75194297 I broke down in tears while thinking my purpose again View Thread 10/26/23(Thu)12:20:26 No.75194473 >>75194297 (OP) # You pass butter WUBBALUBBADUBDUB](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/387/d67.jpg)
![: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 10 Replies / 3 Images : Anonymous 8) 63 KB JPG 10/26/23(Thu)11:58:20 No.75194297 I broke down in tears while thinking my purpose again View Thread 10/26/23(Thu)12:20:26 No.75194473 >>75194297 (OP) # You pass butter WUBBALUBBADUBDUB](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/387/d67.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon questions his sexuality | /r/Greentext
![File: IMG_1966.jpg (41 KB, 640x557) Am I gay? Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)09:32:19 No.75195458 >>75195483 >>75195493 >>75195506 >>75195523 >>75195467 >be me >straight >friend says that if he can show me his d--- over discord vc he would give me a free lunch ($9.50+ each) >Imao what >money eyes.gif >agree >he asks if I can show my d--- to him he would give me another free lunch >what Imao >decline >money on my mind.png >eventually agree >millionare.mp3 Robots, is this gay? I don't think so, and I did it for the money so it's ok. Is this normal?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/386/9ee.jpg)
![File: IMG_1966.jpg (41 KB, 640x557) Am I gay? Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)09:32:19 No.75195458 >>75195483 >>75195493 >>75195506 >>75195523 >>75195467 >be me >straight >friend says that if he can show me his d--- over discord vc he would give me a free lunch ($9.50+ each) >Imao what >money eyes.gif >agree >he asks if I can show my d--- to him he would give me another free lunch >what Imao >decline >money on my mind.png >eventually agree >millionare.mp3 Robots, is this gay? I don't think so, and I did it for the money so it's ok. Is this normal?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/386/9ee.jpg)
Greentext Stories
anon shares a not so fun story | /r/Greentext
![>be me last year >Taking my girlfriend home >She's my f------ everything >Drop her off, tell her I love her >She asks me to come in for a bit before I close the door >I accept and go in >She bought a new love sack >We lay in it like pic related >She keeps trying to get me to stay longer but I have to get home to let my dog out and I know she needs sleep >She accepts and I leave >On the way out I get a call from her and she's saying she's feeling kinda sick >She tells me she loves me and goodnight >I get home, let my dog out and fall asleep >Next morning wake up to 3 missed calls from her >Her mom called me The Get Up Kids 618 KB PNG >Her mom is still crying and says my gf took her life >I can't even breathe and I hang up >My dog hops on my lap and I just lay there for hours >Still haven't recovered a year later.. I wish I couldve helped her bros.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/385/68a.png)
![>be me last year >Taking my girlfriend home >She's my f------ everything >Drop her off, tell her I love her >She asks me to come in for a bit before I close the door >I accept and go in >She bought a new love sack >We lay in it like pic related >She keeps trying to get me to stay longer but I have to get home to let my dog out and I know she needs sleep >She accepts and I leave >On the way out I get a call from her and she's saying she's feeling kinda sick >She tells me she loves me and goodnight >I get home, let my dog out and fall asleep >Next morning wake up to 3 missed calls from her >Her mom called me The Get Up Kids 618 KB PNG >Her mom is still crying and says my gf took her life >I can't even breathe and I hang up >My dog hops on my lap and I just lay there for hours >Still haven't recovered a year later.. I wish I couldve helped her bros.](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/385/68a.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon asked the real question | /r/Greentext
![R: 4/1: 1 Would your country be a good axe?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/348/949.jpg)
![R: 4/1: 1 Would your country be a good axe?](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/348/949.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anon eats LOADS of carrots | /r/Greentext
![Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)19:06:54 No.908269590 ► >>908269667 >>908269713 >>908270270 >>908270445 >>908270918 >>908271357 >>908271437 >>908271654 >>908272108 >>908272265 >>908272911 >>908273382 >>908269397 >be dog >do a poo >my owner ignores it >people complain and tell them to pick it up >be horse >do a poo >my owner ignores it >go home to castle >eat more carrots >do a big race >lose >get shot dog poo is small.. horse poo is big.. what size or weight is enough for ME to be able to s--- in the streets? Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)19:08:15 No.908269667 >>908270150 >>908270649 >>908270844 >>908271275 >>908271324 >>908272258 >>908272618 >>908273159 >>908274512 >>908275008 >>908275349 >>908275532 >>908275849 >>908276139 >>908269590 If this was /pol/ I could 100% guarantee your flag wouldn't be India](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/330/818.png)
![Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)19:06:54 No.908269590 ► >>908269667 >>908269713 >>908270270 >>908270445 >>908270918 >>908271357 >>908271437 >>908271654 >>908272108 >>908272265 >>908272911 >>908273382 >>908269397 >be dog >do a poo >my owner ignores it >people complain and tell them to pick it up >be horse >do a poo >my owner ignores it >go home to castle >eat more carrots >do a big race >lose >get shot dog poo is small.. horse poo is big.. what size or weight is enough for ME to be able to s--- in the streets? Anonymous 10/25/23(Wed)19:08:15 No.908269667 >>908270150 >>908270649 >>908270844 >>908271275 >>908271324 >>908272258 >>908272618 >>908273159 >>908274512 >>908275008 >>908275349 >>908275532 >>908275849 >>908276139 >>908269590 If this was /pol/ I could 100% guarantee your flag wouldn't be India](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/330/818.png)
Greentext Stories
Anon uses dating apps | /r/Greentext
![File: IMG_4360.jpg (21 KB, 220x275) Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)07:59:28 No.908296520 >>908296792 >be me >download tinder and bumble >get no matches >get a haircut, trim beard so it looks nice and put on nice clothes >take new pics >get no matches still >one week goes by and I finally get a match >open bumble and it's a massive woman with acne on her face >looks like fat is overtaking her face, eyes nose and mouth look small and surrounded by fat >fuckit >chat her up for a bit >15 minutes >she tells me she is a size queen and asks how big my penis is >I tell her the true size >she says that isn't enough for her >go to message her again and I am unmatched >zero matches since then](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/311/072.jpg)
![File: IMG_4360.jpg (21 KB, 220x275) Anonymous 10/26/23(Thu)07:59:28 No.908296520 >>908296792 >be me >download tinder and bumble >get no matches >get a haircut, trim beard so it looks nice and put on nice clothes >take new pics >get no matches still >one week goes by and I finally get a match >open bumble and it's a massive woman with acne on her face >looks like fat is overtaking her face, eyes nose and mouth look small and surrounded by fat >fuckit >chat her up for a bit >15 minutes >she tells me she is a size queen and asks how big my penis is >I tell her the true size >she says that isn't enough for her >go to message her again and I am unmatched >zero matches since then](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/311/072.jpg)
Greentext Stories
Anons sister says bad words | /r/Greentext
![KUNG FU KISSES QUZSA 41 KB JPG >be me in like 2007 >12-13 years old >Watching pucca with my younger sister who's 8 >For no reason whatsoever she says "this show is so f------ stupid" >My mom and I look at each other in shock >Turns out my sister had learned some bad words at school >Ffw a week >Walking through casino to find our dad who works at a restaurant >Sister taps my shoulder and says "look at that n****r over there" >I look at her and start laughing my ass off >Mom pulls her aside and spanks her for being racist >Ffw again to today >Sister has black boyfriend my temptation to tell this story at family dinner is at an all time high](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/masonry/002/688/310/f22.png)
![KUNG FU KISSES QUZSA 41 KB JPG >be me in like 2007 >12-13 years old >Watching pucca with my younger sister who's 8 >For no reason whatsoever she says "this show is so f------ stupid" >My mom and I look at each other in shock >Turns out my sister had learned some bad words at school >Ffw a week >Walking through casino to find our dad who works at a restaurant >Sister taps my shoulder and says "look at that n****r over there" >I look at her and start laughing my ass off >Mom pulls her aside and spanks her for being racist >Ffw again to today >Sister has black boyfriend my temptation to tell this story at family dinner is at an all time high](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/002/688/310/f22.png)
Greentext Stories