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Anon on the plight of the zoomers | /r/Greentext

File: 1721884549847434.jpg (6 KB, 200x202) ☐ Anonymous (ID: yyTSDhgw 08/03/24(Sat) 18:11:50 No.476823935 >>476824099 >>476824318 >>476825346 >>476826603 >Zoomies get scammed with $160,000 of debt for college >Get their degree in poopoonomics with a side of gender studies >Get out can't find a job and cri on TikTok >Complain they can't buy food >Vote Kamala
File: 1721884549847434.jpg (6 KB, 200x202) ☐ Anonymous (ID: yyTSDhgw 08/03/24(Sat) 18:11:50 No.476823935 >>476824099 >>476824318 >>476825346 >>476826603 >Zoomies get scammed with $160,000 of debt for college >Get their degree in poopoonomics with a side of gender studies >Get out can't find a job and cri on TikTok >Complain they can't buy food >Vote Kamala

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Anon receives guidance | /r/Greentext

5h (7/6 19:44) · 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024 x 1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man
5h (7/6 19:44) · 71510310 JPG 43KB (1024 x 1024) 1613510906010.jpg 5 Replies back when I was first starting, like 4 months in >at my gym there was always this super jacked black guy that would put up huge numbers >everytime he's done with his set he yells out "0000000 BABY" >it was never obnoxious or anything, I found it funny >he catches me smirking at him after he did it once >he tells me that it helps with the next set >I laugh >a few weeks pass and I'm on a hard set of deadlifts >was still doing stronglifts so these are my max >push through them and for some reason yell out "000000 BABY" >I hear "DAS RIGHT" from across the gym >my next was easier Thank you jacked black man

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Anon is lonley | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/30/22(Fri)16:31:02 No.886526720 >be me, 30 years old >write greentext >screenshot it and post it on plebbit >some retards make fun of "anon" 106 KB JPG The only notifications I ever get on my phone. >keep writing greentexts just to have some human contact Wish I knew how to make friends. Anyway, going to post this there too. How are you doing /b/
Anonymous 09/30/22(Fri)16:31:02 No.886526720 >be me, 30 years old >write greentext >screenshot it and post it on plebbit >some retards make fun of "anon" 106 KB JPG The only notifications I ever get on my phone. >keep writing greentexts just to have some human contact Wish I knew how to make friends. Anyway, going to post this there too. How are you doing /b/

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Anon gets a puppy | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 31 KB PNG >be me 02/13/19(Wed)13:55:42 No.792533342 >be loser who drives a delivery van all day >work is f------ boring as f--- >get new puppy >puppy is sad when I go to work >have idea >I will take puppy to work with me >Next day put puppy in van >Puppy sits shotgun all day, does not piss or poop in cab >Take puppy to park during lunch break >Puppy waits patiently while I make deliveries >Drive home >Realize work was fun with my little puppy buddy >Have never had this much enjoyment of work >Thank you puppy
Anonymous 31 KB PNG >be me 02/13/19(Wed)13:55:42 No.792533342 >be loser who drives a delivery van all day >work is f------ boring as f--- >get new puppy >puppy is sad when I go to work >have idea >I will take puppy to work with me >Next day put puppy in van >Puppy sits shotgun all day, does not piss or poop in cab >Take puppy to park during lunch break >Puppy waits patiently while I make deliveries >Drive home >Realize work was fun with my little puppy buddy >Have never had this much enjoyment of work >Thank you puppy

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anon has a meltdown | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 No.49047062 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours
Anonymous 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 No.49047062 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours

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Anon learns the trade | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 43 KB JPG pathetic it is >start to laugh 04/02/22(Sat)20:46:41 No.875559943 >tired of the last 6 years spent stagnant >decide to end it >remember my uncle gifted me a revolver >it's a .22 >f---, but aye hollow points >wonder if i have any pills >benadryl >look at my options and think of how >slight breakdown of laughing and crying >phone vibrates >my brother-in-law >says he feels bad i've been unhappy with my dead end job, want to know if i'm open to becoming an electrician like he is >offers to help me every part of the way "i know it's not your thing, anon, but i think it could benefit you in the long run" >looking at pills and gun again "alright. thanks, man" that was about 3 years back. dude unknowingly pulled me up at a low point in my life, and introduced me to a trade i really enjoy. this is gay ass ramble, but i'm just thankful to be in a better place than have missed out on how much better things could be.
: Anonymous 43 KB JPG pathetic it is >start to laugh 04/02/22(Sat)20:46:41 No.875559943 >tired of the last 6 years spent stagnant >decide to end it >remember my uncle gifted me a revolver >it's a .22 >f---, but aye hollow points >wonder if i have any pills >benadryl >look at my options and think of how >slight breakdown of laughing and crying >phone vibrates >my brother-in-law >says he feels bad i've been unhappy with my dead end job, want to know if i'm open to becoming an electrician like he is >offers to help me every part of the way "i know it's not your thing, anon, but i think it could benefit you in the long run" >looking at pills and gun again "alright. thanks, man" that was about 3 years back. dude unknowingly pulled me up at a low point in my life, and introduced me to a trade i really enjoy. this is gay ass ramble, but i'm just thankful to be in a better place than have missed out on how much better things could be.

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Anon bonds with dad before dad passes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 2 KB JPG 08/15/19(Thu)22:34:36 No.807214230 >be me,5 years ago >sitting alone in hospital room with 94 year old dad >nothing wrong with him just old and his time is coming >just sitting there with him when suddenly he starts whistling we,ll meet again by Vera Lynn >after he finishes I look at him and tell him it was a good song >he looks up at me from his bed "Damn f------ right it was. Best song in the world" >I go onto my phone and put on the song and we listen for a while >after awhile more of hanging out I leave and go home for the night >wake up in the morning to a text from my sister that he died a bit after I left >mfw we'll meet again pops. some day
Anonymous 2 KB JPG 08/15/19(Thu)22:34:36 No.807214230 >be me,5 years ago >sitting alone in hospital room with 94 year old dad >nothing wrong with him just old and his time is coming >just sitting there with him when suddenly he starts whistling we,ll meet again by Vera Lynn >after he finishes I look at him and tell him it was a good song >he looks up at me from his bed "Damn f------ right it was. Best song in the world" >I go onto my phone and put on the song and we listen for a while >after awhile more of hanging out I leave and go home for the night >wake up in the morning to a text from my sister that he died a bit after I left >mfw we'll meet again pops. some day

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Anon is a good citizen | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 7 KB PNG >be me 09/11/21(Sat)23:59:37 No.862886219 >walking home from work on my usual route smoking a cigi >see couple with a stroller >they are walking pretty fast but im a bit faster >realise i wont pass them quickly enough and the baby will inhale my smoke >take different route
Anonymous 7 KB PNG >be me 09/11/21(Sat)23:59:37 No.862886219 >walking home from work on my usual route smoking a cigi >see couple with a stroller >they are walking pretty fast but im a bit faster >realise i wont pass them quickly enough and the baby will inhale my smoke >take different route

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Anon is in love | /r/Greentext

File: 1456575533337.jpg (8 KB, 213x255) Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)06:58:28 No.853835864 >turned 29 today >feels like any normal day >mom, dad and 2 other friends greet me >nothing special going on today >hot Korean neighbour rings doorbell >been friends with her for 3 years now >she greets me and hands me a box of sushi >fall in love I wanna marry her.
File: 1456575533337.jpg (8 KB, 213x255) Anonymous 05/07/21(Fri)06:58:28 No.853835864 >turned 29 today >feels like any normal day >mom, dad and 2 other friends greet me >nothing special going on today >hot Korean neighbour rings doorbell >been friends with her for 3 years now >she greets me and hands me a box of sushi >fall in love I wanna marry her.

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Anon lives in the big apple | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 6 KB JPG >BADDA BING >be me >20 05/08/16(Sun)23:04:54 No.683368161 >walking around Brooklyn >new to the city >feel and opportunity come up >yell at the top of my lungs > some fat guy in a greasy tank top yells from his apartment window >BADDA BOOM >mfw
Anonymous 6 KB JPG >BADDA BING >be me >20 05/08/16(Sun)23:04:54 No.683368161 >walking around Brooklyn >new to the city >feel and opportunity come up >yell at the top of my lungs > some fat guy in a greasy tank top yells from his apartment window >BADDA BOOM >mfw

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when someone finds out | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 49 KB WEBP 8/3/2024, 3:31:34 PM > going through twitter No.39786797 > find a about some artist having a freakout about there oc being on the banner > check to see if this is true > it is
Anonymous 49 KB WEBP 8/3/2024, 3:31:34 PM > going through twitter No.39786797 > find a about some artist having a freakout about there oc being on the banner > check to see if this is true > it is

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Judas was a fool | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard
: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard

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anon resists gluttony | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 51 KB JPG 05/31/23(Wed)10:03:20 No.73514876 >at McDonald's drive thru >approaching to the window >"What can I get for you, sir?" >being silent for several minutes >hearing angry swearings from people behind you and nervous honking >10 minutes later >finally giving an answer >"Nothing" >Driving away immediately
Anonymous 51 KB JPG 05/31/23(Wed)10:03:20 No.73514876 >at McDonald's drive thru >approaching to the window >"What can I get for you, sir?" >being silent for several minutes >hearing angry swearings from people behind you and nervous honking >10 minutes later >finally giving an answer >"Nothing" >Driving away immediately

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Anon is not a fan of the USA | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 140 KB JPG 06/28/21(Mon)14:52:01 No.857854052 >highest number of prisoners PER CAPITA >highest violent crime rate in the western world >highest number of mass shootings of any developed country >no universal healthcare >super high tuition, high student loan debt >richest corporations pay exactly $0 in taxes >2 party political system that produces nothing >staggering amounts of homelessness >has been at war every decade >opioid and prescription pill addicted youth Be sure to celebrate it all on July 4th.
Anonymous 140 KB JPG 06/28/21(Mon)14:52:01 No.857854052 >highest number of prisoners PER CAPITA >highest violent crime rate in the western world >highest number of mass shootings of any developed country >no universal healthcare >super high tuition, high student loan debt >richest corporations pay exactly $0 in taxes >2 party political system that produces nothing >staggering amounts of homelessness >has been at war every decade >opioid and prescription pill addicted youth Be sure to celebrate it all on July 4th.

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Anon becomes a redditor | /r/Greentext

[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: d7e-3011696890.jpg (76 KB, 1200x1200) [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [☐ Auto] Anonymous 08/03/24(Sat) 10:54:43 No.922315967 ► >be me >Download reddit to see what normies are up to >Make a joke about a guy being a cuck that calls someone a white supremacist over minor disagreement on r/rare insults >Get called a white supremacist >Click on their profile >"Active in these communities r/whiteboy discussion r/BNWobsessed >Uninstall app These people are beyond parody [Post a Reply] 0/0/? 0/0/?
[Return] [Catalog] [Bottom] [Update] [Auto] File: d7e-3011696890.jpg (76 KB, 1200x1200) [Return] [Catalog] [Top] [Update] [☐ Auto] Anonymous 08/03/24(Sat) 10:54:43 No.922315967 ► >be me >Download reddit to see what normies are up to >Make a joke about a guy being a cuck that calls someone a white supremacist over minor disagreement on r/rare insults >Get called a white supremacist >Click on their profile >"Active in these communities r/whiteboy discussion r/BNWobsessed >Uninstall app These people are beyond parody [Post a Reply] 0/0/? 0/0/?

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Honor and Loyalty | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)07:49:56 No.201439924 ultraboglight.jpg 58 KB JPG >YOU HAD SEX WITH THAT SHIFTER 20 TIMES??? >WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME AND HAD ACCESS TO ALL MY MEMORIES SO SHE PERFECTED MY PERSONALITY TOO?? >YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN IT WASN'T ME! >I DON'T CARE IF THE SHIFTER BASICALLY R---- YOU DAYS AFTER TEK-KNIGHT DID >ME, THE SUPERHERO, COULDN'T ESCAPE FROM A CHAIN FOR 10 DAYS! THATS WORSE! >APOLOGIZE TO ME NOWWWW! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE DAD JUST DIED. I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE FELT BAD FOR >MY MOM IS ANGRY THAT I GOT AN ABORTION, I'M DEPRESSED, I'M THE VICTIM Why do the writers expect us to like this character?
: Anonymous 07/19/24(Fri)07:49:56 No.201439924 ultraboglight.jpg 58 KB JPG >YOU HAD SEX WITH THAT SHIFTER 20 TIMES??? >WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE LOOKS JUST LIKE ME AND HAD ACCESS TO ALL MY MEMORIES SO SHE PERFECTED MY PERSONALITY TOO?? >YOU SHOULD'VE KNOWN IT WASN'T ME! >I DON'T CARE IF THE SHIFTER BASICALLY R---- YOU DAYS AFTER TEK-KNIGHT DID >ME, THE SUPERHERO, COULDN'T ESCAPE FROM A CHAIN FOR 10 DAYS! THATS WORSE! >APOLOGIZE TO ME NOWWWW! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE DAD JUST DIED. I'M THE ONE WHO SHOULD BE FELT BAD FOR >MY MOM IS ANGRY THAT I GOT AN ABORTION, I'M DEPRESSED, I'M THE VICTIM Why do the writers expect us to like this character?

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anon watches hamza | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 8 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)23:40:56 No.31451466 >waking up early >sun exposure >cold shower >water, coffee, and milk only >heavy reading >lifting, running, calisthenics, swimming (some kind of physical activity) >balanced diet with good intake of protein >no p--- >8-9 hours of sleep what else?
Anonymous 8 KB JPG 06/15/24(Sat)23:40:56 No.31451466 >waking up early >sun exposure >cold shower >water, coffee, and milk only >heavy reading >lifting, running, calisthenics, swimming (some kind of physical activity) >balanced diet with good intake of protein >no p--- >8-9 hours of sleep what else?

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Iron Domed | /r/Greentext

mother I want to die and become a martyr inshallah my son Iron dome your son died >>476724599 # why did you kill him?! IMG_5579.jpg 636 KB JPG >wants to become a martyr >becomes a martyr >his family complains >rinse and repeat
mother I want to die and become a martyr inshallah my son Iron dome your son died >>476724599 # why did you kill him?! IMG_5579.jpg 636 KB JPG >wants to become a martyr >becomes a martyr >his family complains >rinse and repeat

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Peeping tom | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:23 No.201810891 BROWARD COUNTY PESCUE DEPARTMENT CAN RESCUE BUREAU 1297957008179_ORIGINAL.jpg 31 KB JPG >Did you just look at my boobs just now? How do you respond without sounding like a misogynist pervert?
Anonymous 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:23 No.201810891 BROWARD COUNTY PESCUE DEPARTMENT CAN RESCUE BUREAU 1297957008179_ORIGINAL.jpg 31 KB JPG >Did you just look at my boobs just now? How do you respond without sounding like a misogynist pervert?

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Anon chews 5 gum | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 5 KB PNG >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum
Anonymous 10/07/18(Sun)22:59:29 No.781775753 >be me >19 yo 6/10 >Go out to movie with bestie of 3 years >9/10 5 KB PNG >Its technically a date >Dinner and movie >Get ice cream afterwards >Give her a glass flower I bought earlier in the month >She loves it and we go for a walk >Pull out 5GUM:TRUTH OR DARE PACK >Her wrapper says take a selfie with eyes closed >She does >I read mine It says to ask the most beautiful person in the room to kiss >We laugh it off but u remember the glass flower base has a mirror on the bottom side Where's the most beautiful girl at though? >Look at the mirrored base Oh look I found her! >Showed her the mirrored base of the flower >We smile and kiss for the first time ever >She reads the other part of the wrapper >"What's the most romantic moment you've shared with the person next to you?" >"This one right now" >mfw how it feels to chew 5gum

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