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Anons gf is a boomer | /r/Greentext

Anonymous My gf is a boomer ¿ 175 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)18:23:44 No.70969226 >have awesome,sweet, pretty gf >mid 20s >shes completely oblivious to technology though >feels like she time traveled from the 1950s >she cant call a uber with the app,she calls taxi companies by phone >she uses facebook >i caught her watching a youtube video ON HER PHONE BROWSER and she didnt know how to skip the adds >she says she watches the adds cuz she didnt know she can skip them >mostly she watches tv (talking boomer stuff like news, talk shows) Its not even annoying, just weird af.Anyone else know people like this?
Anonymous My gf is a boomer ¿ 175 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)18:23:44 No.70969226 >have awesome,sweet, pretty gf >mid 20s >shes completely oblivious to technology though >feels like she time traveled from the 1950s >she cant call a uber with the app,she calls taxi companies by phone >she uses facebook >i caught her watching a youtube video ON HER PHONE BROWSER and she didnt know how to skip the adds >she says she watches the adds cuz she didnt know she can skip them >mostly she watches tv (talking boomer stuff like news, talk shows) Its not even annoying, just weird af.Anyone else know people like this?

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Work smarter not harder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try No.49047062 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours
: Anonymous 11/01/18(Thu)20:30:36 >Have a whole week to do an assignment >Wait until the last 4 hours >have panic attack and total meltdown because 4 hours isn't enough to do it >have to try No.49047062 58 KB PNG >do it in 2 hours >get 95% on the assignment >one week to do assignment >wait until the last 2 hours

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Anon doesn’t like Gabe Newell | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: JmrURBC3) 609 KB PNG 12/14/20(Mon)17:39:46 No.296529735 Gabe Newell escaped to New Zealand just before the corona hysteria. Is it a safe heaven for the elite? Anonymous (ID: N7cAcaTk 12/14/20(Mon)17:41:26 No.296529950 >Scamming lying a------ now lives in my country F--- off Gabe you're not welcome here >>296531024 # >>296538786 # >>296549410 # >>296554071 # Anonymous (ID: KO >>296529950 # f--- you 12/14/20(Mon)21:21:45 No.296554071 behee.jpg 702 KB JPG >>206554225 # 2296554233# >>206554303 # 39
: Anonymous (ID: JmrURBC3) 609 KB PNG 12/14/20(Mon)17:39:46 No.296529735 Gabe Newell escaped to New Zealand just before the corona hysteria. Is it a safe heaven for the elite? Anonymous (ID: N7cAcaTk 12/14/20(Mon)17:41:26 No.296529950 >Scamming lying a------ now lives in my country F--- off Gabe you're not welcome here >>296531024 # >>296538786 # >>296549410 # >>296554071 # Anonymous (ID: KO >>296529950 # f--- you 12/14/20(Mon)21:21:45 No.296554071 behee.jpg 702 KB JPG >>206554225 # 2296554233# >>206554303 # 39

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Anon is a virgin | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 32 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)02:53:39 No.888998937 Is there anything more cucked than wearing a condom? >allows society and people who aren't even in your lives to tell you what to do >allows women telling you what to do instead of you telling her what to do >"hurrrr I have sex though so that means I'm right and I won at life" even rats and worms have sex. keep teling yourself what a winner you are as you get ready to go to your $15/hr job 6 Replies / 1 Image Anonymous : Anonymous >>888998937 (OP) # Virgin lol 11/13/22(Sun)02:57:10 No.888999042 View Thread 11/13/22(Sun)02:57:13 No.888999044 >getting cucked into child support Been down that road. Have fun, anon.
Anonymous 32 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)02:53:39 No.888998937 Is there anything more cucked than wearing a condom? >allows society and people who aren't even in your lives to tell you what to do >allows women telling you what to do instead of you telling her what to do >"hurrrr I have sex though so that means I'm right and I won at life" even rats and worms have sex. keep teling yourself what a winner you are as you get ready to go to your $15/hr job 6 Replies / 1 Image Anonymous : Anonymous >>888998937 (OP) # Virgin lol 11/13/22(Sun)02:57:10 No.888999042 View Thread 11/13/22(Sun)02:57:13 No.888999044 >getting cucked into child support Been down that road. Have fun, anon.

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Anon is insulted | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 176741958 390.2 kB JPG >skyscraper mud huts >fighting with spears >flying around in a spaceship that looks like a tribal mask 8 REPLIES 10 IMAGES 1 REPLY >magical rhythmic water chopping to open and close the main gate >the woman on the counsel with the mud covered dreadlocks >the man on the counsel with the giant lip plate >stated to be the most powerful, benevolent country on the planet with the most advanced technology and smartest people How does this not come off as insultingly patronizing? I seriously have no idea how they are not only getting away with this, but also having people applaud this as some culturally significant work of art. Anonymous | 176743090 that's exactly what brazil is like though 3 hr ago... Anonymous 176743523 >>176741958 (OP) What's Wakanda's tax policy? REPLY 2 hr ago ●●● 2 hr ago.
Anonymous | 176741958 390.2 kB JPG >skyscraper mud huts >fighting with spears >flying around in a spaceship that looks like a tribal mask 8 REPLIES 10 IMAGES 1 REPLY >magical rhythmic water chopping to open and close the main gate >the woman on the counsel with the mud covered dreadlocks >the man on the counsel with the giant lip plate >stated to be the most powerful, benevolent country on the planet with the most advanced technology and smartest people How does this not come off as insultingly patronizing? I seriously have no idea how they are not only getting away with this, but also having people applaud this as some culturally significant work of art. Anonymous | 176743090 that's exactly what brazil is like though 3 hr ago... Anonymous 176743523 >>176741958 (OP) What's Wakanda's tax policy? REPLY 2 hr ago ●●● 2 hr ago.

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Anon likes dinosaurs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Dinosaurs 1.01 MB JPG 08/05/22(Fri)15:48:02 No.883319932 Happened earlier today >Be Me >Watching p--- >Get bored and decide to watch cam girls instead. >Have an account already with tokens and s---. >Click on hot girl with big t------ >After watching for a while I get an idea. >type in chat: "What's your favorite Dinosaur?" >Message pops up on her stream, and she thinks about it. >try's describing a stegosaurus before remembering what it's called. >she starts happily talking about how she used to go to the park with her dad as a kid, and pretend to search for dinosaur bones in the sand. >She looks sad after she finish the story. >She seems deep in thought. >She gets up and ends the stream. My autism wanted to know what dinosaurs online strippers liked, and instead I sent a cam-girl into depression over her poor current relationship with her father.
: Anonymous Dinosaurs 1.01 MB JPG 08/05/22(Fri)15:48:02 No.883319932 Happened earlier today >Be Me >Watching p--- >Get bored and decide to watch cam girls instead. >Have an account already with tokens and s---. >Click on hot girl with big t------ >After watching for a while I get an idea. >type in chat: "What's your favorite Dinosaur?" >Message pops up on her stream, and she thinks about it. >try's describing a stegosaurus before remembering what it's called. >she starts happily talking about how she used to go to the park with her dad as a kid, and pretend to search for dinosaur bones in the sand. >She looks sad after she finish the story. >She seems deep in thought. >She gets up and ends the stream. My autism wanted to know what dinosaurs online strippers liked, and instead I sent a cam-girl into depression over her poor current relationship with her father.

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Anon likes long bois | /r/Greentext

I really love this animal The bonzai
I really love this animal The bonzai

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anon forgot his pills | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: TSEV+zXr 11/15/21(Mon)21:48:35 No.347728380 Reminder that if you are still unvaxxed you survived the biggest psyop in human history. They elaborated an evil plan for decades. Do you realize how much time, resources and effort they put into this? They studied all the possible ways to enslave your mind and make you take the vaxx. They tried to demoralize you by corrupting society from every possible corner. They tried to vilify and desensitize your mind with p---. They tried to lure you with money, gifts and rewards. They tried to confuse you and make you doubt your own reality and identity. They tried to make you walk on your own principles, values and ethics. They even turned your close ones against you. Almost everyone felt for it. Almost all of them cucked in. But not you. Just realize how much b------- you went through and overcame. You never cucked. You are still unvaxxed. You are still a pure blood. Their tricks didn't work on you. So to all the unvaxxed I say to you Cheers gentlemen! Stay based. 7 KB JPG
: Anonymous (ID: TSEV+zXr 11/15/21(Mon)21:48:35 No.347728380 Reminder that if you are still unvaxxed you survived the biggest psyop in human history. They elaborated an evil plan for decades. Do you realize how much time, resources and effort they put into this? They studied all the possible ways to enslave your mind and make you take the vaxx. They tried to demoralize you by corrupting society from every possible corner. They tried to vilify and desensitize your mind with p---. They tried to lure you with money, gifts and rewards. They tried to confuse you and make you doubt your own reality and identity. They tried to make you walk on your own principles, values and ethics. They even turned your close ones against you. Almost everyone felt for it. Almost all of them cucked in. But not you. Just realize how much b------- you went through and overcame. You never cucked. You are still unvaxxed. You are still a pure blood. Their tricks didn't work on you. So to all the unvaxxed I say to you Cheers gentlemen! Stay based. 7 KB JPG

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Anon loves Toy Story | /r/Greentext

File: 1277701026.jpg (97 KB, 540x800, 1277700841402.jpg) >> y CXAR JUNE 18 Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:57:06 No.245158XXX So did you all buy your Jessie toy, masturbate and c-- on her face, then leave the room while you imagine all your other toys trying to console her while she cries, knowing she can't get the c-- off her face because it would cause suspicion? Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:10 No.245159XXX lol Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:26 No.245159XXX WHAT Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:33 No.245159XXX Yes Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:57 No.245159XXX If this were facebook I would like this Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:59:05 No.245159XXX I did it to buzz too Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:59:27 No.245159XXX oh my f------ god sir, good point you've made
File: 1277701026.jpg (97 KB, 540x800, 1277700841402.jpg) >> y CXAR JUNE 18 Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:57:06 No.245158XXX So did you all buy your Jessie toy, masturbate and c-- on her face, then leave the room while you imagine all your other toys trying to console her while she cries, knowing she can't get the c-- off her face because it would cause suspicion? Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:10 No.245159XXX lol Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:26 No.245159XXX WHAT Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:33 No.245159XXX Yes Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:58:57 No.245159XXX If this were facebook I would like this Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:59:05 No.245159XXX I did it to buzz too Anonymous 06/28/10(Mon)00:59:27 No.245159XXX oh my f------ god sir, good point you've made

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anon ponders | /r/Greentext

mouth anas Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:11:20 No.70957221 >>70957239 >>70957286 (You) Honestly speaking how can the digestive treat be one unique tube. I don't understand. If true, if you open the mouth and unclutch the anus (like in draing) you would be divided into two Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:13:16 No.70957238 File: 1666746637855211.jpg (44 KB, 512x512) google yandex iqdb wait LIVE SLUG REACTION Some kind of based retard thread goin on here Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:13:32 No.70957239 >>70957221 (OP) Were you born in Flatland? Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:17:59 No.70957286 >>70957221 (OP) bro forgot the third dimension
mouth anas Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:11:20 No.70957221 >>70957239 >>70957286 (You) Honestly speaking how can the digestive treat be one unique tube. I don't understand. If true, if you open the mouth and unclutch the anus (like in draing) you would be divided into two Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:13:16 No.70957238 File: 1666746637855211.jpg (44 KB, 512x512) google yandex iqdb wait LIVE SLUG REACTION Some kind of based retard thread goin on here Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:13:32 No.70957239 >>70957221 (OP) Were you born in Flatland? Anonymous 11/12/22(Sat)13:17:59 No.70957286 >>70957221 (OP) bro forgot the third dimension

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Anon studied the blade | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: bb73RTWr RENTIES RISE UP 08/12/21(Thu)17:33:22 No.39675057 US renter accused of cutting off landlord's head with samurai sword after dispute 31/07/2020 Matt Burrows 8945865A-3622-4D8F-A384-73712E03F71A.jpg 382 KB JPG >HEY RENTIE, YER FIVE MINUTES LATE ON THE RENT, IM KEEPING YOUR DEPOSIT >"keep it...I'll just keep...YOUR SOUL" *unzips katana* >*SHWING SHWING SHWING* *landie explodes into a million pieces* >"heh...nothing personnel...landcuck. while you studied real estate, I studied the blade."
: Anonymous (ID: bb73RTWr RENTIES RISE UP 08/12/21(Thu)17:33:22 No.39675057 US renter accused of cutting off landlord's head with samurai sword after dispute 31/07/2020 Matt Burrows 8945865A-3622-4D8F-A384-73712E03F71A.jpg 382 KB JPG >HEY RENTIE, YER FIVE MINUTES LATE ON THE RENT, IM KEEPING YOUR DEPOSIT >"keep it...I'll just keep...YOUR SOUL" *unzips katana* >*SHWING SHWING SHWING* *landie explodes into a million pieces* >"heh...nothing personnel...landcuck. while you studied real estate, I studied the blade."

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Anon is normal | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.643300058 1 minute ago >Be me >Best friend and I move into a house together >Neither of us have GFs >F--- each other because it's better than masturbating >Decide to get married for tax benefits >Adopt a kid to be our little bro >One day while we f--- our balls touch >He doesnt stop and say "no h---" Am I married to a f-----? How do I tell our son?
Anonymous No.643300058 1 minute ago >Be me >Best friend and I move into a house together >Neither of us have GFs >F--- each other because it's better than masturbating >Decide to get married for tax benefits >Adopt a kid to be our little bro >One day while we f--- our balls touch >He doesnt stop and say "no h---" Am I married to a f-----? How do I tell our son?

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anon damaged his bike | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 33 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat) 19:04:49 No.70961680 >Be pizza delivery guy >Some hood n----- orders a pizza >Drive to his shack >Ring the doorbell >N----- opens the door with a submachine gun pointed in my general direction >Starts spraying >Misses every shot >Says "My bad, man" >Takes the pizza and gives me a large tip >Turn around >He hit my bike >Get back to restaurant >Boss docks my pay because of damaged bike Kinda wish the n----- hadn't missed
: Anonymous 33 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat) 19:04:49 No.70961680 >Be pizza delivery guy >Some hood n----- orders a pizza >Drive to his shack >Ring the doorbell >N----- opens the door with a submachine gun pointed in my general direction >Starts spraying >Misses every shot >Says "My bad, man" >Takes the pizza and gives me a large tip >Turn around >He hit my bike >Get back to restaurant >Boss docks my pay because of damaged bike Kinda wish the n----- hadn't missed

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Anon makes a sacrifice | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/14/17 (Fri) 15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood 19 KB JPG >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?
: Anonymous 07/14/17 (Fri) 15:49:12 No.38371043 >uncle was dying of cancer >on hospital bed >doctors said he had 1 day left to live >sad, go to my room and lock the door >radomly decide to do a blood sacrifice by sacrificing my life for his >drew a pentagram on a piece of paper and then cut my palm with a knife and soaked the paper with blood 19 KB JPG >prayed that my uncle gets better in exchange for my life >next day uncle makes a miraculous recovery This was just a coincidence r-right?

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Anon thinks about trans girls | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 564 KB PNG : Anonymous : Anonymous 11/09/22(Wed)18:32:13 No.28306038 >don't want to date trans people bigot >want to date trans people chaser 11/09/22(Wed)18:33:29 No.28306053 11/09/22(Wed)18:34:50 No.28306065 >>28306038 (OP) # trans women are women and therefore they are completely retarded
: Anonymous 564 KB PNG : Anonymous : Anonymous 11/09/22(Wed)18:32:13 No.28306038 >don't want to date trans people bigot >want to date trans people chaser 11/09/22(Wed)18:33:29 No.28306053 11/09/22(Wed)18:34:50 No.28306065 >>28306038 (OP) # trans women are women and therefore they are completely retarded

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Anon’s chain got jerked | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/09/22(Mon)20:10:43 No.68563456 >84 year old grandfather tells me that he's joined a message board devoted to discussing cars >based on the way he speaks, he clearly had no idea what a message board was until very recently 117 KB JPG >he shows me some of his post history >he enjoys posting stupid, obviously false and ridiculous information just to see how people reply >he doesn't know the terms shitposting or trolling, so he says "I'm jerkin' their chains!" and scrolls down, busting a gut with laughter as he reads off some of the replies An 84 year old man is an online troll. I am genuinely ashamed to be his grandson. Anonymous >>68563456 (OP) lol sounds like your chain got jerked 05/09/22(Mon)20:37:06 No.68563759
Anonymous 05/09/22(Mon)20:10:43 No.68563456 >84 year old grandfather tells me that he's joined a message board devoted to discussing cars >based on the way he speaks, he clearly had no idea what a message board was until very recently 117 KB JPG >he shows me some of his post history >he enjoys posting stupid, obviously false and ridiculous information just to see how people reply >he doesn't know the terms shitposting or trolling, so he says "I'm jerkin' their chains!" and scrolls down, busting a gut with laughter as he reads off some of the replies An 84 year old man is an online troll. I am genuinely ashamed to be his grandson. Anonymous >>68563456 (OP) lol sounds like your chain got jerked 05/09/22(Mon)20:37:06 No.68563759

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Anon finishes early | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/25/13(Sat)00:55 No.16442287 Replies: >>16442341 >>16442343 >>16442433 >>16442460 >>16442510 >listening to music >cleaning up my man cave >gf says she is going to the store >decide it's time for a fap >wait a few minutes after she left >strip naked because that's how I do >searching for that perfect fap video >getting close hear the door open and shut >shut my computer down but keep fapping hoping gf will come down and finish me off >decide I am going to surprise her and j--- the second she walks in (seemed better at the time) >hear someone walking down the stairs >decide to stand for this >as the door opens shoot my load all over some dude in a ski mask >I literally fall back stunned and reach for my gun >he is yelling w-- >hold him at gunpoint until the cops come >cop asks what is all over the guys shirt and pants >explain and give my statement >I can still hear them laughing...
Anonymous 05/25/13(Sat)00:55 No.16442287 Replies: >>16442341 >>16442343 >>16442433 >>16442460 >>16442510 >listening to music >cleaning up my man cave >gf says she is going to the store >decide it's time for a fap >wait a few minutes after she left >strip naked because that's how I do >searching for that perfect fap video >getting close hear the door open and shut >shut my computer down but keep fapping hoping gf will come down and finish me off >decide I am going to surprise her and j--- the second she walks in (seemed better at the time) >hear someone walking down the stairs >decide to stand for this >as the door opens shoot my load all over some dude in a ski mask >I literally fall back stunned and reach for my gun >he is yelling w-- >hold him at gunpoint until the cops come >cop asks what is all over the guys shirt and pants >explain and give my statement >I can still hear them laughing...

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Carbonara Cuck | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/22/22(Mon)23:02:20 No.18269511 >get a tinder date >have couple of drinks >hit it off >she doesn't want to go home >bring her back to my place >cook a carbonara but f--- it up >it's scrambled eggs with pasta >she tries to be nice and nibbles it >roommate comes home >notices what happens >asks to talk to me in private >says not to worry and he's gonna save my date >whips up a perfect carbonara for us and leaves to his room >rest of the night goes OK >we don't f--- and she stops acting interested >next morning she says she had fun but is not interested >next week roommate brings her over >realize I've been carbonara cucked >have to hear them banging for the 3 months they dated can't even be mad >>18269532 # >>18270787 #
: Anonymous 08/22/22(Mon)23:02:20 No.18269511 >get a tinder date >have couple of drinks >hit it off >she doesn't want to go home >bring her back to my place >cook a carbonara but f--- it up >it's scrambled eggs with pasta >she tries to be nice and nibbles it >roommate comes home >notices what happens >asks to talk to me in private >says not to worry and he's gonna save my date >whips up a perfect carbonara for us and leaves to his room >rest of the night goes OK >we don't f--- and she stops acting interested >next morning she says she had fun but is not interested >next week roommate brings her over >realize I've been carbonara cucked >have to hear them banging for the 3 months they dated can't even be mad >>18269532 # >>18270787 #

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Anon gets fired | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 336 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)03:07:03 No.888984381 > get laid off from twitter > go home > enter the garage > close the door > sit in my car > turn it on > wait > 3 hours later the battery finally dies > goddamn you Elon View Thread
: Anonymous 336 KB JPG 11/13/22(Sun)03:07:03 No.888984381 > get laid off from twitter > go home > enter the garage > close the door > sit in my car > turn it on > wait > 3 hours later the battery finally dies > goddamn you Elon View Thread

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Anon likes Fallout New Vegas | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Fallout NEW VEGAS 12 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat)20:29:40 No.888982766 2 Replies >is the best title ever released by Bethesda How did Todd f--- up the fallout series so bad after NV? Fallout could have been the best intellectual property in videogames EVER, but then Bethesda made Fallout 4 and it all went to s---. View Thread : Anonymous >>888982766 (OP) # >fallout new vegas >most loved by trannies 11/12/22(Sat)20:31:04 No.888982830
Anonymous Fallout NEW VEGAS 12 KB JPG 11/12/22(Sat)20:29:40 No.888982766 2 Replies >is the best title ever released by Bethesda How did Todd f--- up the fallout series so bad after NV? Fallout could have been the best intellectual property in videogames EVER, but then Bethesda made Fallout 4 and it all went to s---. View Thread : Anonymous >>888982766 (OP) # >fallout new vegas >most loved by trannies 11/12/22(Sat)20:31:04 No.888982830

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