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They didn't have a crowbar | /r/Greentext

1.89 MB PNG >this took over earth in 7 hours, has the entirety of humanity under its heels, and has conquered numerous other worlds and galaxy's >gets beaten by a nerd with a crowbar and like a couple dozen bulgarian dudes with beanies and shotguns how??? the combine is set up to be this great technological unstoppable threat and it gets beaten so damn easily
1.89 MB PNG >this took over earth in 7 hours, has the entirety of humanity under its heels, and has conquered numerous other worlds and galaxy's >gets beaten by a nerd with a crowbar and like a couple dozen bulgarian dudes with beanies and shotguns how??? the combine is set up to be this great technological unstoppable threat and it gets beaten so damn easily

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Spacial effects | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/21/24(Sun)02:05:23 No.201523356 O-STAR-WARS-facebook.jpg 306 KB JPG >fire >sound of an explosion >in space >where there is no oxygen
: Anonymous 07/21/24(Sun)02:05:23 No.201523356 O-STAR-WARS-facebook.jpg 306 KB JPG >fire >sound of an explosion >in space >where there is no oxygen

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Anon is panicking. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 188 KB PNG 10/06/22(Thu)22:32:25 No.70486472 >new guy at work started this week >he's small, like 5'5 but not pathetic and thin small just short >long blonde hair, blue eyes >really pleasant face, round and soft features >didn't think about it until we were taking a break and talking >he asked me a question and I looked over and he looked deep into my eyes >unironically froze up >his expression was almost mystical, I couldn't look away >stammer out an answer and move on >now every time I see him I catch myself looking at his ass >think about how his slender frame makes me want to grab him around the shoulders >everything he does is graceful >he unironically is just elegant >I catch myself trying to impress him constantly >accidentally laugh at every slight joke he makes >realized today that I was eagerly waiting for him to show up dudes what the f--- I'm not gay I've been attracted to women my whole life what is going on
Anonymous 188 KB PNG 10/06/22(Thu)22:32:25 No.70486472 >new guy at work started this week >he's small, like 5'5 but not pathetic and thin small just short >long blonde hair, blue eyes >really pleasant face, round and soft features >didn't think about it until we were taking a break and talking >he asked me a question and I looked over and he looked deep into my eyes >unironically froze up >his expression was almost mystical, I couldn't look away >stammer out an answer and move on >now every time I see him I catch myself looking at his ass >think about how his slender frame makes me want to grab him around the shoulders >everything he does is graceful >he unironically is just elegant >I catch myself trying to impress him constantly >accidentally laugh at every slight joke he makes >realized today that I was eagerly waiting for him to show up dudes what the f--- I'm not gay I've been attracted to women my whole life what is going on

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Race Loser | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 07/27/24(Sat) 16:24:26 No.78300001 181 KB PNG >Be Radical Christians >Burn you own religious symbol Is the KKK retarded?
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 07/27/24(Sat) 16:24:26 No.78300001 181 KB PNG >Be Radical Christians >Burn you own religious symbol Is the KKK retarded?

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Anon and his Gf | /r/Greentext

>be me >girlfriend and I argued today >tempers flared >hurtfeelings.jpg >didn't talk for hours >I finally apologized to her >kissed her >grabbed her makeup bag >applied eyeliner on her n------ >inserted her lipstick into her vagina >slowly pushed her mascara into her butthole makeup sex is the best
>be me >girlfriend and I argued today >tempers flared >hurtfeelings.jpg >didn't talk for hours >I finally apologized to her >kissed her >grabbed her makeup bag >applied eyeliner on her n------ >inserted her lipstick into her vagina >slowly pushed her mascara into her butthole makeup sex is the best

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Was Judas stupid? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard
: Anonymous 07/25/24(Thu)05:52:31 No.16889066 Judas-2.jpg 2.77 MB JPG >sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard

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pattern recognition | /r/Greentext

File: NVmnBXze9EIHZU6SmykrJLIV.jpg (1.67 MB, 2880x2160) Bloodborne Anonymous 07/26/24(Fri)22:39:14 No.683861037 >A cult of big nose doctors and academics use the fluids of an alien neovagina to give hormone replacement treatment to people, making them lose their sanity and become frenzied gooners, eventually morphing into furries you are appointed to hunt Is this THE chud game?
File: NVmnBXze9EIHZU6SmykrJLIV.jpg (1.67 MB, 2880x2160) Bloodborne Anonymous 07/26/24(Fri)22:39:14 No.683861037 >A cult of big nose doctors and academics use the fluids of an alien neovagina to give hormone replacement treatment to people, making them lose their sanity and become frenzied gooners, eventually morphing into furries you are appointed to hunt Is this THE chud game?

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Anon Watches the Olympics | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 07/27/24(Sat)13:11:04 No.78298386 257 KB PNG >Watches the Paris Olympics ceremony This is really going to be a shitshow
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous ▼ Settings Mobile Home 07/27/24(Sat)13:11:04 No.78298386 257 KB PNG >Watches the Paris Olympics ceremony This is really going to be a shitshow

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Anon had a great brother | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 112 KB PNG 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:03 No.921964021 > be me, 9yo > Love Mister Rogers > Watch Mister Rogers' Neighborhood every day > Big brother doesn't like the show > Calls it boring > Idc because Mister Rogers seems really nice and so do all of his friends > Kids at school are mean to me, Mister Rogers was my friend > 2006 > Mister Rogers fkn dies > Mom breaks the news > bigfknsad.jpeg > I literally cry for days > Big brother tells me he's not really gone > wut > Tells me that when people die you can still talk to them if you have their email > No idea what an email is, ask him if he could get it for me > Big bro delivers, helps me write emails to Mister Rogers' ghost using his email account > Mister Rogers always replies a day later and Big bro reads them with me > They're all really nice, Mister Rogers thanks me for missing him and for being his friend > Keep this up for like three months before I no longer feel the need to talk to Mister Rogers every day > FF to last year > Big bro on chemo, terminal > Doctor tells us he doesn't have much longer > Big bro gives me an envelope, makes me promise not to open it until he's gone > fknhurtsman > Bro passes on > Can't bring myself to open the envelope for months > Finally open it > Login info for Mister Rogers' email I miss you bro :c
Anonymous 112 KB PNG 07/27/24(Sat)22:13:03 No.921964021 > be me, 9yo > Love Mister Rogers > Watch Mister Rogers' Neighborhood every day > Big brother doesn't like the show > Calls it boring > Idc because Mister Rogers seems really nice and so do all of his friends > Kids at school are mean to me, Mister Rogers was my friend > 2006 > Mister Rogers fkn dies > Mom breaks the news > bigfknsad.jpeg > I literally cry for days > Big brother tells me he's not really gone > wut > Tells me that when people die you can still talk to them if you have their email > No idea what an email is, ask him if he could get it for me > Big bro delivers, helps me write emails to Mister Rogers' ghost using his email account > Mister Rogers always replies a day later and Big bro reads them with me > They're all really nice, Mister Rogers thanks me for missing him and for being his friend > Keep this up for like three months before I no longer feel the need to talk to Mister Rogers every day > FF to last year > Big bro on chemo, terminal > Doctor tells us he doesn't have much longer > Big bro gives me an envelope, makes me promise not to open it until he's gone > fknhurtsman > Bro passes on > Can't bring myself to open the envelope for months > Finally open it > Login info for Mister Rogers' email I miss you bro :c

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Divine relationship | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 07/20/24(Sat)21:07:24 No.201512837 youre-only-remaining-link-the-world-s1.jpg 64 KB JPG >man becomes a literal god >woman complains because they can't relate and spend time together like they used to What the f--- is wrong with women?
Anonymous 07/20/24(Sat)21:07:24 No.201512837 youre-only-remaining-link-the-world-s1.jpg 64 KB JPG >man becomes a literal god >woman complains because they can't relate and spend time together like they used to What the f--- is wrong with women?

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Anon is tired of multiplayer games | /r/Greentext

← /v/683880597/ а 56m (07/27/24 13:45) · 683880597 · 6 Re· 1 Img JPG 101KB (690 × 564) 1693255715144523.jpg 2 Replies No humanity OK >pick character a girl in my team wanted to pick >stupid bitch shittalks me the entire match and obsesses over ever mistake I make while playing worse than me >finally have enough and respond "oh my god, shut up you dumb hole" >entire team instantly turns against me >get kicked I am so done with multiplayer games. 36m (07/27/24 14:04) 683881547 Deserved
← /v/683880597/ а 56m (07/27/24 13:45) · 683880597 · 6 Re· 1 Img JPG 101KB (690 × 564) 1693255715144523.jpg 2 Replies No humanity OK >pick character a girl in my team wanted to pick >stupid bitch shittalks me the entire match and obsesses over ever mistake I make while playing worse than me >finally have enough and respond "oh my god, shut up you dumb hole" >entire team instantly turns against me >get kicked I am so done with multiplayer games. 36m (07/27/24 14:04) 683881547 Deserved

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anon tries dating | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 16 KB JPG 10/04/21(Mon)11:57:15 No.65633207 >start dating girl >we're both 23 >she looks so normal totally not what you would call a "slut" >her body count is 22 I legit can't cope and uts killing me
Anonymous 16 KB JPG 10/04/21(Mon)11:57:15 No.65633207 >start dating girl >we're both 23 >she looks so normal totally not what you would call a "slut" >her body count is 22 I legit can't cope and uts killing me

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What did I mean by this? | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 64 KB JPG 07/18/22(Mon)03:25:11 No.882243039 >be me in high school >im the one person that uses my own personal laptop instead of the dogshit chromebooks loaded with spyware >everyone around me thinks im a god with computers despite me knowing basic s--- >take linux basics class for IT program at a uni nearby >decide to do homework for linux class during lunch at HS >run an update for the os through command line >bigfuckinmistake.exe "Bruh h-------- hes hacking!" >crowd swarms over to me >try to explain that im just updating packages but retards wont listen >gets the attention of school resource officer >mfw im chewed out for the next hour and a half about trying to hack the school network >fine i guess, just wont do homework at school anymore >go home and boot up pc to finish homework and open up linux vm "See! I told you he was right!" >apparently school resource officer called my parents >mfw they think im hacking too >mfw my parents call the cops in response >mfw the investigation showed no evidence of me hacking and my parents dont believe them >mfw i literally just tried to update the f------ os
Anonymous 64 KB JPG 07/18/22(Mon)03:25:11 No.882243039 >be me in high school >im the one person that uses my own personal laptop instead of the dogshit chromebooks loaded with spyware >everyone around me thinks im a god with computers despite me knowing basic s--- >take linux basics class for IT program at a uni nearby >decide to do homework for linux class during lunch at HS >run an update for the os through command line >bigfuckinmistake.exe "Bruh h-------- hes hacking!" >crowd swarms over to me >try to explain that im just updating packages but retards wont listen >gets the attention of school resource officer >mfw im chewed out for the next hour and a half about trying to hack the school network >fine i guess, just wont do homework at school anymore >go home and boot up pc to finish homework and open up linux vm "See! I told you he was right!" >apparently school resource officer called my parents >mfw they think im hacking too >mfw my parents call the cops in response >mfw the investigation showed no evidence of me hacking and my parents dont believe them >mfw i literally just tried to update the f------ os

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Putting a smile on your face | /r/Greentext

Anonymous FO 07/19/24(Fri)17:02:52 No.201461986 3 1716015472970156.png 1.23 MB PNG >hear a knock on the door >see these two guys saying they want to make you smile and become happy what do here
Anonymous FO 07/19/24(Fri)17:02:52 No.201461986 3 1716015472970156.png 1.23 MB PNG >hear a knock on the door >see these two guys saying they want to make you smile and become happy what do here

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Work at taco bell | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Taco tards TACO BELL 35 KB JPG 07/27/24(Sat) 08:33:12 No.921951500 >work at taco bell >get new coworker >complete tard Not talking autist or downie but one of those f------ that thinks they were funny in middle school and still funny >moans randomly >pulls his shirt up while working with food >screams randomly >grabbed my chest and when I grabbed his ass he looked actually scared >whitey who thinks he's a thug >f------ 5'6" and thinks he can take someone who's literally a foot taller than him >when customers see him I have to explain we have a mentality challenged worker >they look at me with sympathy Seeing this f--- from afar would be funny, working with him makes me wanna strangle him and his parents
Anonymous Taco tards TACO BELL 35 KB JPG 07/27/24(Sat) 08:33:12 No.921951500 >work at taco bell >get new coworker >complete tard Not talking autist or downie but one of those f------ that thinks they were funny in middle school and still funny >moans randomly >pulls his shirt up while working with food >screams randomly >grabbed my chest and when I grabbed his ass he looked actually scared >whitey who thinks he's a thug >f------ 5'6" and thinks he can take someone who's literally a foot taller than him >when customers see him I have to explain we have a mentality challenged worker >they look at me with sympathy Seeing this f--- from afar would be funny, working with him makes me wanna strangle him and his parents

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Anon does a political analysis | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>61130873 # 03/10/24(Sun)21:45:34 No.61133690 No. There are parts of the US doing quite well, and parts that are doing quite poorly. That's been pretty normal throughout. As far as NYC, the subways weren't quite as nice as the DC subways (or at least, the underground DC terminals which were very nice and cool), but they weren't disgusting by and large. What HAS changed is that the opiate, homeless, and fringe political populations now make up at least 5% of the US, and probably more in lower income areas. Probably at least 5%-10 of the US working age population is just permanently out of commission post-COVID and are limping along, having either fallen so far behind socioeconomically in life they cant possibly recover, are so mentally ill that working 9-5 without random mental health days off is impossible, have some insane ideology that keeps them from having a normal life without bitching about fascists or trump or jews or trumpjewfascists, had social development impaired or reversed due to covid lockdowns, or they have become so addicted to drugs that they are stuck in a permanent brain fog of dopamine surges and crashes. Its like the 70s socially where all the vietnam veterans came back addicted to heroin, drugs were cheap and widely available, there were black panthers/kkk standoffs everywhere, and tons of people had bachelors of basketweaving but no other useful skills (to get out of the draft). Except now people are terminally online and survive on a drip feed of social media outrage which is naturally more profitable than actual news or informational content. >>61134129 #
: Anonymous >>61130873 # 03/10/24(Sun)21:45:34 No.61133690 No. There are parts of the US doing quite well, and parts that are doing quite poorly. That's been pretty normal throughout. As far as NYC, the subways weren't quite as nice as the DC subways (or at least, the underground DC terminals which were very nice and cool), but they weren't disgusting by and large. What HAS changed is that the opiate, homeless, and fringe political populations now make up at least 5% of the US, and probably more in lower income areas. Probably at least 5%-10 of the US working age population is just permanently out of commission post-COVID and are limping along, having either fallen so far behind socioeconomically in life they cant possibly recover, are so mentally ill that working 9-5 without random mental health days off is impossible, have some insane ideology that keeps them from having a normal life without bitching about fascists or trump or jews or trumpjewfascists, had social development impaired or reversed due to covid lockdowns, or they have become so addicted to drugs that they are stuck in a permanent brain fog of dopamine surges and crashes. Its like the 70s socially where all the vietnam veterans came back addicted to heroin, drugs were cheap and widely available, there were black panthers/kkk standoffs everywhere, and tons of people had bachelors of basketweaving but no other useful skills (to get out of the draft). Except now people are terminally online and survive on a drip feed of social media outrage which is naturally more profitable than actual news or informational content. >>61134129 #

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Different standards | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 60 KB PNG 07/24/24(Wed)14:14:01 No.683580675 >l pirate movies __(ツ)_/¯ >l pirate music __(ツ)_¯ >l pirate software __(ツ)_¯ >I pirate video games (Д')~ — Why do people act like this?
Anonymous 60 KB PNG 07/24/24(Wed)14:14:01 No.683580675 >l pirate movies __(ツ)_/¯ >l pirate music __(ツ)_¯ >l pirate software __(ツ)_¯ >I pirate video games (Д')~ — Why do people act like this?

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Anon is a groomer. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous idiot 64 KB JPG >Be me 26 >khhv all my life 07/27/24(Sat)01:10:44 No.78293759 >Get desperate and try to groom a girl >Talk to a girl on Discord >16 year old egirl >The zoomer stuff she talks about makes me want to rope >Keeps making me listen to Taylor Swift for some reason >Give up after a week You know what maybe being incel for life isn't that bad after all
Anonymous idiot 64 KB JPG >Be me 26 >khhv all my life 07/27/24(Sat)01:10:44 No.78293759 >Get desperate and try to groom a girl >Talk to a girl on Discord >16 year old egirl >The zoomer stuff she talks about makes me want to rope >Keeps making me listen to Taylor Swift for some reason >Give up after a week You know what maybe being incel for life isn't that bad after all

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Just trust me bro | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Fallout London FOLON Fallout 4 downgrader 07/26/24(Fri)02:53:31 No.683724828 Login to Steam Please log into Steam beføre downgrading Fallout 4. To downgrade Fallout 4 we will need to download files via Steam, please login to do so. Username: Password: Password hidden: You can also do this process manually if you'd like, Developed by Comelus Rosenaa nope.png 150 KB PNG Login to Stear >"Just give us your Steam login to play our mod, trust us bro" Anonymous 07/26/24(Fri)02:55:59 No.683725067 Just check Password Hidden and it will be hidden from them retard >>683725287 # >>683725495 # >>683725823 # >>683731005 # >>683734980 # >>683735163 # >>683735436 # >>683735524 # >>683737830 # >>683738336 # >>683740829 # >>683741452 # >>683741707 # >>683742323 # >>683742374 # >>683742471 # >>683742480 # >>683742482 #
Anonymous Fallout London FOLON Fallout 4 downgrader 07/26/24(Fri)02:53:31 No.683724828 Login to Steam Please log into Steam beføre downgrading Fallout 4. To downgrade Fallout 4 we will need to download files via Steam, please login to do so. Username: Password: Password hidden: You can also do this process manually if you'd like, Developed by Comelus Rosenaa nope.png 150 KB PNG Login to Stear >"Just give us your Steam login to play our mod, trust us bro" Anonymous 07/26/24(Fri)02:55:59 No.683725067 Just check Password Hidden and it will be hidden from them retard >>683725287 # >>683725495 # >>683725823 # >>683731005 # >>683734980 # >>683735163 # >>683735436 # >>683735524 # >>683737830 # >>683738336 # >>683740829 # >>683741452 # >>683741707 # >>683742323 # >>683742374 # >>683742471 # >>683742480 # >>683742482 #

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Anon has somebody watching their back | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 1.19 MB JPG 06/17/21(Thu)20:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high- crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent some time in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice > leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing
Anonymous 1.19 MB JPG 06/17/21(Thu)20:44:00 No.857076209 >be 2nd grade teacher >school is in low-income, high- crime neighborhood >one of my kids often gets picked up by his grandpa >grandpa is an OG who used to be a gangbanger in the 80s, spent some time in prison, and got his s--- together >he's big and scary-looking, but super f------ nice > leave the school after working late one day, some dudes walk up to me and ask what time it is >look down at my watch and one of them sucker punches me >try to fight back but it's 3-on-1 >get my watch, phone, and wallet taken >next day during dismissal >students grandpa notices bruises, asks what the hell happened >oh I got jumped by some guys on my way home >he asks what they looked like >don't know but I remember they drove away in a white Camaro >he nods and says okay >about a week later, student comes back and hands me a plastic bag from his backpack >inside is my phone, wallet, and watch >see a news report a few months later about a white Camaro found at the bottom of a nearby lake >owner is still missing

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