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There is no reason Canada should be allowed to exist. | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Me when it comes to the idea of America annexing Canada Authoritarian Authoritarian Left Economic- Left Libertarian Left Authoritarian Right Economic- "noninterventionist" Right "Thinks most recent wars were Libertarian pointless." "doesn't want the US to be in any conflict since I have brother in army." Libertarian Right Me normally
Me when it comes to the idea of America annexing Canada Authoritarian Authoritarian Left Economic- Left Libertarian Left Authoritarian Right Economic- "noninterventionist" Right "Thinks most recent wars were Libertarian pointless." "doesn't want the US to be in any conflict since I have brother in army." Libertarian Right Me normally

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How ghosts scare lib right | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Boo Воо Right Right Воо The national debt is 31 trillion dollars Right ANNNN!!! Right
Boo Воо Right Right Воо The national debt is 31 trillion dollars Right ANNNN!!! Right

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"stop strawmanning the right" no, i dont think i will | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Stop strawmanning the right! You're an emily, the left cant meme! & C as QUIT HAVING FUN Lat le
Stop strawmanning the right! You're an emily, the left cant meme! & C as QUIT HAVING FUN Lat le

Political Compass
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all of these things are happening | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

clear strawman against the left F--- THIS S------- F--- THE RETARDS IN THIS COUNTRY.F--- THE CULTURE.I WISH SOMEONE WILL NUKE HERE This is a beautiful country with a magnificent culture.I am glad to be a citizen of this place. Economic F--- off you p-------- THE WHOLE WORLD MUST SEE THAT ISRAEL MUST EXIST AND HAS THE www.lomi RIGHT TO EXIST AND IS ONE OF THE GREAT OUTPOSTS OF DEMOCRACY IN THE WORLD. MARTIN LUTHER KING clear strawman against the right I HATE THIS S--- PLACE!!!IT IS NOT PROGRESSIVE ENOUGH!!!!IT IS BASICALLY A THIRD WORLD COUNTRY!!! SO DO I. Right I look at children's genitals Conomi I look at children's Thanks for your service officer genitals to prevent trans kids from using the correct bathroom r/PCM i sleep r/PCM Low Engineering 3846 - 5 hr. ago -Lib-Center PON Woodsman Dan - 3 hr. ago -Lib-Center I like the part where you pretended this is actually happening and not just a strawman Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow ↑ 14 Dayum. Beat the s--- outta that strawman. Great job. ↑ 88 Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow berserkerboi1269. 3 hr. ago - Auth-Center How much strawmen do you want with your meme sir 10 tastychuncks 4 hr. ago ■ - Lib-Right Do you have a rabbit who is eating all this straw? 35 Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow real s---
clear strawman against the left F--- THIS S------- F--- THE RETARDS IN THIS COUNTRY.F--- THE CULTURE.I WISH SOMEONE WILL NUKE HERE This is a beautiful country with a magnificent culture.I am glad to be a citizen of this place. Economic F--- off you p-------- THE WHOLE WORLD MUST SEE THAT ISRAEL MUST EXIST AND HAS THE www.lomi RIGHT TO EXIST AND IS ONE OF THE GREAT OUTPOSTS OF DEMOCRACY IN THE WORLD. MARTIN LUTHER KING clear strawman against the right I HATE THIS S--- PLACE!!!IT IS NOT PROGRESSIVE ENOUGH!!!!IT IS BASICALLY A THIRD WORLD COUNTRY!!! SO DO I. Right I look at children's genitals Conomi I look at children's Thanks for your service officer genitals to prevent trans kids from using the correct bathroom r/PCM i sleep r/PCM Low Engineering 3846 - 5 hr. ago -Lib-Center PON Woodsman Dan - 3 hr. ago -Lib-Center I like the part where you pretended this is actually happening and not just a strawman Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow ↑ 14 Dayum. Beat the s--- outta that strawman. Great job. ↑ 88 Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow berserkerboi1269. 3 hr. ago - Auth-Center How much strawmen do you want with your meme sir 10 tastychuncks 4 hr. ago ■ - Lib-Right Do you have a rabbit who is eating all this straw? 35 Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow Reply Give Award Share Report Save Follow real s---

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Iran 1984 | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Aut DE Some face recognition in use in Iran today comes from Chinese camera and artificial intelligence company Tiandy. Its dealings in Iran were featured UnoriginalitumanBeing Pinterest rian Iran Says Face Recognition Will ID Women Breaking Hijab Laws Won't stop me 4 Libertarian
Aut DE Some face recognition in use in Iran today comes from Chinese camera and artificial intelligence company Tiandy. Its dealings in Iran were featured UnoriginalitumanBeing Pinterest rian Iran Says Face Recognition Will ID Women Breaking Hijab Laws Won't stop me 4 Libertarian

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How the compass sees one another | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

The fighters for the people Economic- Left Naive Authoritarian people who are loyal to the cause Forced Ethics imgflip.com Economic- Left The people who will save the world Facists who endangers the lives of the people Libertarian Authoritarian Authoritarian The Bourgeoisie who enslaves the people Economic Right Facists who want to kill us all Libertarian Economic Right Greedy, Selfish Bastards Authoritarian Commies that threaten the balance of society Economic- Left Idiots that bend to the will of commie overlords Libertarian Commie bastards who will ruin our way of life The people who follow traditon and rejects immoral change Economic- Left Naive idiots who think the world is sunshine and rainbows Economic Right Immoral mercs Libertarian that is useful to have around Authoritarian Oppressors that gives freedom a bad name Economic Right The people free from tyranny Libertarian
The fighters for the people Economic- Left Naive Authoritarian people who are loyal to the cause Forced Ethics imgflip.com Economic- Left The people who will save the world Facists who endangers the lives of the people Libertarian Authoritarian Authoritarian The Bourgeoisie who enslaves the people Economic Right Facists who want to kill us all Libertarian Economic Right Greedy, Selfish Bastards Authoritarian Commies that threaten the balance of society Economic- Left Idiots that bend to the will of commie overlords Libertarian Commie bastards who will ruin our way of life The people who follow traditon and rejects immoral change Economic- Left Naive idiots who think the world is sunshine and rainbows Economic Right Immoral mercs Libertarian that is useful to have around Authoritarian Oppressors that gives freedom a bad name Economic Right The people free from tyranny Libertarian

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pretty sure the us could start hunting the homeless for sport and people would support it | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Homeless people are lazy, they steal and should just get a job. I hate them being around me so much they should stop being lazy and taking drugs. Walgreens executive says the company 'cried too much' about theft and may cut back on private security guards The truth is that many do- in fact, a 2021 study from the University of Chicago estimates that 53% of people living in homeless shelters and 40% of unsheltered people were employed, either full or part-time, in the year that people were observed homeless between 2011 - 2018. ņ What was that uhhh I have to go
Homeless people are lazy, they steal and should just get a job. I hate them being around me so much they should stop being lazy and taking drugs. Walgreens executive says the company 'cried too much' about theft and may cut back on private security guards The truth is that many do- in fact, a 2021 study from the University of Chicago estimates that 53% of people living in homeless shelters and 40% of unsheltered people were employed, either full or part-time, in the year that people were observed homeless between 2011 - 2018. ņ What was that uhhh I have to go

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The White House has found its new host | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY THINK THAT THE POLITICAL COMPASS IS AN ACCURATE DEPICTION OF COMPLEX POLITICO-ECONOMIC BELIEFS I feel bad for you. PEOPLE WHO SCROLL R/PCM TO SEE FUNNY MEMES I don't think about you at all.
PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY THINK THAT THE POLITICAL COMPASS IS AN ACCURATE DEPICTION OF COMPLEX POLITICO-ECONOMIC BELIEFS I feel bad for you. PEOPLE WHO SCROLL R/PCM TO SEE FUNNY MEMES I don't think about you at all.

Political Compass
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The duality of authright | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

n Economi F--- off you p-------- www.lomi Right I look at children's genitals an Economi I look at children's Thanks for your service officer genitals to prevent trans kids from using the correct bathroom
n Economi F--- off you p-------- www.lomi Right I look at children's genitals an Economi I look at children's Thanks for your service officer genitals to prevent trans kids from using the correct bathroom

Political Compass
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Islamic greece is just Turkey with extra steps | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

So CSA flag proposals included: The Pride Flag: The Political Compass: PLATE DEL GRATIA PLATE Islamic Greece: PLATE
So CSA flag proposals included: The Pride Flag: The Political Compass: PLATE DEL GRATIA PLATE Islamic Greece: PLATE

Political Compass
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Mods discussing what flairs can be added | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Left Libright but p-------- Centrist but with equally extreme radical views Libleft but SJW X X i sleep i sleep real s---
Left Libright but p-------- Centrist but with equally extreme radical views Libleft but SJW X X i sleep i sleep real s---

Political Compass
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Armed minorities are harder to oppress | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

"guns should be banned becuase safety" "we need guns because the government can never be fully trusted"
"guns should be banned becuase safety" "we need guns because the government can never be fully trusted"

Political Compass
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Someone is REALLY trying to get this sub banned and surprisingly it's not AuthRight this time | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Current state of this Sub Apprehensiv -Lib-Left I'm down to hunt the homeless for sport : Reply AnriAstolfe - Lib-Left What? Apprehensiv -Lib-Left 1h AnriAstolf ■-Lib-Left What would you use? Apprehensive -Lib-Left An AR-7 of course AnriAstolfe -Lib-Left : 1h Did I stutter? I said I am down to hunt the homeless for sport 1h ⠀ ⠀ 1h 413 + 1h 42 ↓ 49 ↓ 2凸 45+ Why waste the ammo. Their homeless, not the vietcong. I am going to use a kilij and ride on a horse. ⠀ ↑ 6 ↓
Current state of this Sub Apprehensiv -Lib-Left I'm down to hunt the homeless for sport : Reply AnriAstolfe - Lib-Left What? Apprehensiv -Lib-Left 1h AnriAstolf ■-Lib-Left What would you use? Apprehensive -Lib-Left An AR-7 of course AnriAstolfe -Lib-Left : 1h Did I stutter? I said I am down to hunt the homeless for sport 1h ⠀ ⠀ 1h 413 + 1h 42 ↓ 49 ↓ 2凸 45+ Why waste the ammo. Their homeless, not the vietcong. I am going to use a kilij and ride on a horse. ⠀ ↑ 6 ↓

Political Compass
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New Compass drop | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

F--- POLITICAL COMPASS CHARTS 50 WHICH INTEREST GROUP ARE YOU A PART OF
F--- POLITICAL COMPASS CHARTS 50 WHICH INTEREST GROUP ARE YOU A PART OF

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I wanted to see how much my beliefs would change. I’m not surprised tbh | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Me 12 weeks ago Me after subjecting myself to right wing propaganda for 12 weeks for an experiment
Me 12 weeks ago Me after subjecting myself to right wing propaganda for 12 weeks for an experiment

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WTF??? Tax the rich is America tradition??? | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

REJECT MODERNITY TAX CUTS FOR THE PLUTOCRACY RULES CUT CORPORATE TAX RICH NOW TAX CUTS FOR THE 1% EMBRACE TRADITION 1932 1936 1940 1941 1942 1944 1946 1948 1950 1951 1952 1954 1964 1965 1968 1969 1970 1971 1981 55 31 31 32 24 24 24 24 24 24 26 26 26 25 33 33 33 33 17 63% $1,000,000 $19.9 million 4% 79% $5,000,000 4.4% 81.1% $5,000,000 $97.6 million $96.7 million $92.1 million $3.32 million 10% 19% 23% 19% 16.6% 17.4% 20.4% 22.2% 81% $5,000,000 88% $200,000 94% $200,000 86.45% $200,000 82.13% $400,000 84.36% $400,000 91% $400,000 92% $400,000 91% $400,000 $3.08 million $2.78 million $4.51 million $4.51 million $4.18 million $4.08 million $4.04 million 20% 16% 77% $400,000 14% 14% $3.49 million $1.72 million $1.56 million $1.48 million $1.4 million $1.34 million 70% $200,000 75.25% $200,000 77% $200,000 71.75% $200,000 70% $200,000 14% 14% 14% 13.825% 69.125% $215,400 4% $642,021
REJECT MODERNITY TAX CUTS FOR THE PLUTOCRACY RULES CUT CORPORATE TAX RICH NOW TAX CUTS FOR THE 1% EMBRACE TRADITION 1932 1936 1940 1941 1942 1944 1946 1948 1950 1951 1952 1954 1964 1965 1968 1969 1970 1971 1981 55 31 31 32 24 24 24 24 24 24 26 26 26 25 33 33 33 33 17 63% $1,000,000 $19.9 million 4% 79% $5,000,000 4.4% 81.1% $5,000,000 $97.6 million $96.7 million $92.1 million $3.32 million 10% 19% 23% 19% 16.6% 17.4% 20.4% 22.2% 81% $5,000,000 88% $200,000 94% $200,000 86.45% $200,000 82.13% $400,000 84.36% $400,000 91% $400,000 92% $400,000 91% $400,000 $3.08 million $2.78 million $4.51 million $4.51 million $4.18 million $4.08 million $4.04 million 20% 16% 77% $400,000 14% 14% $3.49 million $1.72 million $1.56 million $1.48 million $1.4 million $1.34 million 70% $200,000 75.25% $200,000 77% $200,000 71.75% $200,000 70% $200,000 14% 14% 14% 13.825% 69.125% $215,400 4% $642,021

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If each quadrant got to pick the voting age | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

voting? Economic- Left Authoritarian 25 and older when brain is fully developed 25-50 so only fully mature brains are voting Upper limit of 50 when mental decline begins Economic- Right 16 and older so nobody is taxed without a say Libertarian
voting? Economic- Left Authoritarian 25 and older when brain is fully developed 25-50 so only fully mature brains are voting Upper limit of 50 when mental decline begins Economic- Right 16 and older so nobody is taxed without a say Libertarian

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Emily and the lib left. | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Left Are you two friends? No. O SUAVANI Economic- Right YERBA MATE L Switch Yes.
Left Are you two friends? No. O SUAVANI Economic- Right YERBA MATE L Switch Yes.

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Characters in my neighborhood 8x6 wojak compass | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

MY PROFESSOR NEIGHBOR MOST PROFESSORS Openly Marxist, has books by Mao and Stalin on his shelf Has tried to convince me multiple times that capitalism is doomed to extinction COMMUNIST VANDAL Beginning in 2020 and reoccurring every -4 months, red spraypainted hammer and sickles appear everywhere throughout the neighborhood along with slogans such as "liberate the rebels in Myanmar!" Has told me that he will never trust a white person Amazon packages off porches DARK SKIN IS NOT A CRIME It's so camp and persistent that I refuse to believe it's not a right wing false flag But I wouldn't put it past some people here Yard is full of trash and the porch is stuffed with broken appliances This stuff has been up since 2018 but I've never seen the owners, and frankly I don't want to There's a cop stationed across the street in which he calls a "speed trap," but it's probably deliberate Security footage has also caught him with wire cutters cutting bike locks Has become almost a meme on the neighborhood subreddit, but has somehow never been caught A lot of professors and adjuncts live in the neighborhood because cheap rent STREET PISSER Not any single person, but a variety of drunk men and women who, unable to find a place to release, use the street On Sunday morning one cannot walk two blocks without stepping in piss, vomit, or s--- They kind of blatantly look down on us and at most return a terse nod if you say hello I, too, have been street pisser Overwhelmingly left, but don't really demonstrate it VOTER REGISTATION Every two years they come to your door six times in a month and ask if you have a voting plan for this November They also post up on busy corners I've witnessed them telling people how to register to vote with the Democratic Party and not giving them a choice, it's wild I feel like they see us as idiots They're friends with the Mexican bodega people and generally keep to themselves I could be laying serenely in bed at 71:20 AM and all of a sudden I hear WOOOOOOOWEEE EWOOWEEEWOOO WEEEWOOO HUMAN BLM HOUSE ILLEGAL FAMILY MENTALLY ILL WOMAN AMATEUR COMEDIAN Not many people Found out about them A house four blocks from me with a BLM flag. progress pride flag, and a giant banner hanging off the porch that says "BLACK LIVES MATTER" when I was working for the Census, they were scared to talk to me because they thought I was ICE Obese black woman who carries a 72oz soda and roams around mumbling to herself Rarely changes clothes College-aged guy who and doesn't seem to have a destination to her wandering comes out to the plaza with his guitar and puts on a show on the weekends watch, the biggest audience I've seen are like eight people The Dad works in construction and the kids work as bussers in a local restaurant I hope they get to find their American dream The local Starbucks takes pity and lets him hang out inside when it's cold out He's a veteran of some kind, very thin and PORCH PIRATE/BIKE THIEF SLEEPING BAG MAN MUSHROOM MAN Guy who steals Old homeless man who seems only to possess a dirty sleeping bag, in which he sleeps anaemic looking, likely will die soon HEROIN ADDICTS IN ALLEY Behind my house there's a shady alley, and in this alley two heroin addicts shoot up every day I like to watch from my window sometimes, it's interesting NEIGHBORHOOD One day they didn't show up and a IMPROVEMENT ASSOCIATION Get city and state subsidies to fix problems in the neighborhood bunch of cops were there examining the needles with blue. gloves, but then they left and the addicts returned But I've lived here for five years and I have never seen them do anything Occasionally there's a flyer in my mailbox advertising it and I've tried to walk into the office, but it's always closed I have a conspiracy theory that some Congressman is laundering money through it FOOD BANK Group that collects unwanted, bruised, and discarded food from grocery stores and distributes it to the poor Lowkey I used to go before I found out about EBT It's because there isn't a single supermarket in the neighborhood and many residents are obese but malnourished I can't tell her age or if she has anyone taking care of her, she just shuffles up and down the street mumbling and drinking her soda Man who wears a hat shaped like a mushroom and raps on the corner nearest to me on Friday nights He's genuinely good and very popular, has released a few banger SoundCloud albums Definitely not a resident though, he just knows. this is the demographic that likes his work STRAY CATS The neighborhood is filled with emaciated stray cats and kittens They eat the rats and mice and oftentimes get hit by cars STUDENT CLEANUP CLUB Club from the local university that cleans up trash on the sidewalks and the streets Some altruists set out tuna for them There's a fire station on block from me FIREMEN The sidewalks are suddenly clean then 24 hours later go right back to being horribly dirty again Next-door neighbor, a sorority girl who chain-smokes TL;DR every Saturday night drunk people smash bottles; discard c-------- butts; vomit; and drop food refuse all over the sidewalks Mother Moller They're always rushing to put out fires some idiot kids. light in their backyards College-aged Arab guy three blocks from me who was a big player in the city's coke scene Not sure if he's just warming up on or what but it doesn't seem like a lucarative hobby Genuinely hate her COKE DEALER Had a Porsche SUV and went outside wearing tons of bling Then one day in April 2020, a black Chevy Tahoe pulled up, there was a brief gunfight, and he was killed COP CAR PARKED OUTSIDE BLM HOUSE They claim that it was a random decision to put a speed trap there but I'm pretty sure it's an elaborate trolling attempt/surveillance Most exciting thing to happen in the neighborhood in a decade A cruiser is perpetually parked across the street from the BLM house Either parents of students who live here or visitors in general I stifle a laugh every time I pass the pair Seem off and disgusted by how slovenly the place is SMOKER NEIGHBOR SPANISH BODEGA A Mexican family that runs a tiny grocery store Can't keep s--- on my porch anymore because I'm downwind and I always come out to see a fine layer of ash coating everything, which turns into a tarry sludge Lock their windows and cruise by with bug-eyed expressions NON-RESIDENTS BASEBALL NEIGHBORS FASHIONABLE GERIATRIC CONSTRUCTION CREW Next-door neighbors on the other side, four players on the college baseball team Very old man who would take walks in a full suit Come in from out of town to work on the perpetual street construction F I feel so poor when I see them DELI Trendy gentrified restaurant in the central part of our neighborhood, recently went through some big renovations Tobacco/"water pipe" shop on the main street in our neighborhood The non-residents go here and pay $18 for a turkey sandwich the size of a napkin Where people take first dates to try and impress them Has gotten cited by the Health Department multiple times for cockroaches and mice, and leaving food out for way longer than is safe Nevertheless they have. banging Hispanic groceries, even if they're overpriced Also calling cards to Honduras if that's what you're into SMOKE SHOP Gouges the f--- out of college kids OBVIOUS STING OPERATION Young-looking guy in his late 20s who roams around the neighborhood with a backpack on Friday/Saturday nights asking random passers-by for drug plugs He has a crewcut and acts really uptight, so it's kind of obvious what's going on In 2019 the owners were busted for selling opioids out the back and now it's under new management, but the same place pretty much Feelies Has nevertheless nabbed a couple gullible freshmen Hold massive parties every few weeks, the bass reverberates through my walls and makes it impossible to sleep Feel like a curmudgeonly old man around them Bar around the corner from me BAKE SALE College students who set up an unlicensed bake sale table every Friday and Saturday night The goods are legal and above- board but f--- I'm jealous I didn't get the idea first COLLEGE BAR RABBI Rabbi for the campus Jewish organizations, but he lives two blocks from me Hosts Shabbat dinners at his house, usually they see 50-75 people There are many bars, but this one plays fast and loose with IDs Have frequently seen high schoolers drinking there TELECOM SALESMEN ITALIAN BODEGA TAIWANESE IMMIGRANTS Roam around Feel bad for them because their companies are universally hated, or whatever the f--- but damn it's canvassing the neighborhood to buy Verizon or Comcast Hang a Taiwanese flag out their window Own the most popular Chinese takeout place in the neighborhood, universally beloved except by the mainland Chinese, who hate them for some reason annoying to come to your door only to hear a sales pitch Italian grocery 100 feet from my front door I go sometimes but feel awkward because I'm in my late 20s Patriarch of the Italian bodega family Convenience store three blocks from me Died last year to great lamentation, as he was a neighborhood Huge frat house one block from me, at least 9 people live there icon Sells super overpriced but authentic Italian stuff, I don't go unless I'm desperate The owners don't speak a lick of Italian and pronounce the cheese "MAHTS- ahrella", it's kind of insulting SKETCHY CONVENIENCE STORE Bars on the windows, Dodge chargers hang out in the parking lot blasting rap The owner is known to sell weed under the counter MISSIONARIES A group of Mormons came to the neighborhood in 2018 and began making their rounds On the neighborhood subreddit they're called "brainwashed" and "GQP cultists" without cause, they're nice people EVERY Friday night I can hear the music from down the street, and I look out my window to see more than 100 people on the lawn Appear disgusted at out degeneracy, seem as if they want to leave ASAP I have no idea what compels a person to scream at the top of her lungs at 2:41 AM GRUBHUB/DOORDASHERS Bike around or drive around constantly, delivering food to college students too lazy to cook or leave their houses BIG FRAT HOUSE SLUMLORD Scummy guy who has been buying up cheap real estate throughout the neighborhood, not fixing it at all, and renting it out to college students for obscene prices His name has become an obscenity to the residents of the neighborhood Usually non- residents who disdain us, but make bank off this place Advertises himself everywhere, posters with his face on them and trash and branded with his name
MY PROFESSOR NEIGHBOR MOST PROFESSORS Openly Marxist, has books by Mao and Stalin on his shelf Has tried to convince me multiple times that capitalism is doomed to extinction COMMUNIST VANDAL Beginning in 2020 and reoccurring every -4 months, red spraypainted hammer and sickles appear everywhere throughout the neighborhood along with slogans such as "liberate the rebels in Myanmar!" Has told me that he will never trust a white person Amazon packages off porches DARK SKIN IS NOT A CRIME It's so camp and persistent that I refuse to believe it's not a right wing false flag But I wouldn't put it past some people here Yard is full of trash and the porch is stuffed with broken appliances This stuff has been up since 2018 but I've never seen the owners, and frankly I don't want to There's a cop stationed across the street in which he calls a "speed trap," but it's probably deliberate Security footage has also caught him with wire cutters cutting bike locks Has become almost a meme on the neighborhood subreddit, but has somehow never been caught A lot of professors and adjuncts live in the neighborhood because cheap rent STREET PISSER Not any single person, but a variety of drunk men and women who, unable to find a place to release, use the street On Sunday morning one cannot walk two blocks without stepping in piss, vomit, or s--- They kind of blatantly look down on us and at most return a terse nod if you say hello I, too, have been street pisser Overwhelmingly left, but don't really demonstrate it VOTER REGISTATION Every two years they come to your door six times in a month and ask if you have a voting plan for this November They also post up on busy corners I've witnessed them telling people how to register to vote with the Democratic Party and not giving them a choice, it's wild I feel like they see us as idiots They're friends with the Mexican bodega people and generally keep to themselves I could be laying serenely in bed at 71:20 AM and all of a sudden I hear WOOOOOOOWEEE EWOOWEEEWOOO WEEEWOOO HUMAN BLM HOUSE ILLEGAL FAMILY MENTALLY ILL WOMAN AMATEUR COMEDIAN Not many people Found out about them A house four blocks from me with a BLM flag. progress pride flag, and a giant banner hanging off the porch that says "BLACK LIVES MATTER" when I was working for the Census, they were scared to talk to me because they thought I was ICE Obese black woman who carries a 72oz soda and roams around mumbling to herself Rarely changes clothes College-aged guy who and doesn't seem to have a destination to her wandering comes out to the plaza with his guitar and puts on a show on the weekends watch, the biggest audience I've seen are like eight people The Dad works in construction and the kids work as bussers in a local restaurant I hope they get to find their American dream The local Starbucks takes pity and lets him hang out inside when it's cold out He's a veteran of some kind, very thin and PORCH PIRATE/BIKE THIEF SLEEPING BAG MAN MUSHROOM MAN Guy who steals Old homeless man who seems only to possess a dirty sleeping bag, in which he sleeps anaemic looking, likely will die soon HEROIN ADDICTS IN ALLEY Behind my house there's a shady alley, and in this alley two heroin addicts shoot up every day I like to watch from my window sometimes, it's interesting NEIGHBORHOOD One day they didn't show up and a IMPROVEMENT ASSOCIATION Get city and state subsidies to fix problems in the neighborhood bunch of cops were there examining the needles with blue. gloves, but then they left and the addicts returned But I've lived here for five years and I have never seen them do anything Occasionally there's a flyer in my mailbox advertising it and I've tried to walk into the office, but it's always closed I have a conspiracy theory that some Congressman is laundering money through it FOOD BANK Group that collects unwanted, bruised, and discarded food from grocery stores and distributes it to the poor Lowkey I used to go before I found out about EBT It's because there isn't a single supermarket in the neighborhood and many residents are obese but malnourished I can't tell her age or if she has anyone taking care of her, she just shuffles up and down the street mumbling and drinking her soda Man who wears a hat shaped like a mushroom and raps on the corner nearest to me on Friday nights He's genuinely good and very popular, has released a few banger SoundCloud albums Definitely not a resident though, he just knows. this is the demographic that likes his work STRAY CATS The neighborhood is filled with emaciated stray cats and kittens They eat the rats and mice and oftentimes get hit by cars STUDENT CLEANUP CLUB Club from the local university that cleans up trash on the sidewalks and the streets Some altruists set out tuna for them There's a fire station on block from me FIREMEN The sidewalks are suddenly clean then 24 hours later go right back to being horribly dirty again Next-door neighbor, a sorority girl who chain-smokes TL;DR every Saturday night drunk people smash bottles; discard c-------- butts; vomit; and drop food refuse all over the sidewalks Mother Moller They're always rushing to put out fires some idiot kids. light in their backyards College-aged Arab guy three blocks from me who was a big player in the city's coke scene Not sure if he's just warming up on or what but it doesn't seem like a lucarative hobby Genuinely hate her COKE DEALER Had a Porsche SUV and went outside wearing tons of bling Then one day in April 2020, a black Chevy Tahoe pulled up, there was a brief gunfight, and he was killed COP CAR PARKED OUTSIDE BLM HOUSE They claim that it was a random decision to put a speed trap there but I'm pretty sure it's an elaborate trolling attempt/surveillance Most exciting thing to happen in the neighborhood in a decade A cruiser is perpetually parked across the street from the BLM house Either parents of students who live here or visitors in general I stifle a laugh every time I pass the pair Seem off and disgusted by how slovenly the place is SMOKER NEIGHBOR SPANISH BODEGA A Mexican family that runs a tiny grocery store Can't keep s--- on my porch anymore because I'm downwind and I always come out to see a fine layer of ash coating everything, which turns into a tarry sludge Lock their windows and cruise by with bug-eyed expressions NON-RESIDENTS BASEBALL NEIGHBORS FASHIONABLE GERIATRIC CONSTRUCTION CREW Next-door neighbors on the other side, four players on the college baseball team Very old man who would take walks in a full suit Come in from out of town to work on the perpetual street construction F I feel so poor when I see them DELI Trendy gentrified restaurant in the central part of our neighborhood, recently went through some big renovations Tobacco/"water pipe" shop on the main street in our neighborhood The non-residents go here and pay $18 for a turkey sandwich the size of a napkin Where people take first dates to try and impress them Has gotten cited by the Health Department multiple times for cockroaches and mice, and leaving food out for way longer than is safe Nevertheless they have. banging Hispanic groceries, even if they're overpriced Also calling cards to Honduras if that's what you're into SMOKE SHOP Gouges the f--- out of college kids OBVIOUS STING OPERATION Young-looking guy in his late 20s who roams around the neighborhood with a backpack on Friday/Saturday nights asking random passers-by for drug plugs He has a crewcut and acts really uptight, so it's kind of obvious what's going on In 2019 the owners were busted for selling opioids out the back and now it's under new management, but the same place pretty much Feelies Has nevertheless nabbed a couple gullible freshmen Hold massive parties every few weeks, the bass reverberates through my walls and makes it impossible to sleep Feel like a curmudgeonly old man around them Bar around the corner from me BAKE SALE College students who set up an unlicensed bake sale table every Friday and Saturday night The goods are legal and above- board but f--- I'm jealous I didn't get the idea first COLLEGE BAR RABBI Rabbi for the campus Jewish organizations, but he lives two blocks from me Hosts Shabbat dinners at his house, usually they see 50-75 people There are many bars, but this one plays fast and loose with IDs Have frequently seen high schoolers drinking there TELECOM SALESMEN ITALIAN BODEGA TAIWANESE IMMIGRANTS Roam around Feel bad for them because their companies are universally hated, or whatever the f--- but damn it's canvassing the neighborhood to buy Verizon or Comcast Hang a Taiwanese flag out their window Own the most popular Chinese takeout place in the neighborhood, universally beloved except by the mainland Chinese, who hate them for some reason annoying to come to your door only to hear a sales pitch Italian grocery 100 feet from my front door I go sometimes but feel awkward because I'm in my late 20s Patriarch of the Italian bodega family Convenience store three blocks from me Died last year to great lamentation, as he was a neighborhood Huge frat house one block from me, at least 9 people live there icon Sells super overpriced but authentic Italian stuff, I don't go unless I'm desperate The owners don't speak a lick of Italian and pronounce the cheese "MAHTS- ahrella", it's kind of insulting SKETCHY CONVENIENCE STORE Bars on the windows, Dodge chargers hang out in the parking lot blasting rap The owner is known to sell weed under the counter MISSIONARIES A group of Mormons came to the neighborhood in 2018 and began making their rounds On the neighborhood subreddit they're called "brainwashed" and "GQP cultists" without cause, they're nice people EVERY Friday night I can hear the music from down the street, and I look out my window to see more than 100 people on the lawn Appear disgusted at out degeneracy, seem as if they want to leave ASAP I have no idea what compels a person to scream at the top of her lungs at 2:41 AM GRUBHUB/DOORDASHERS Bike around or drive around constantly, delivering food to college students too lazy to cook or leave their houses BIG FRAT HOUSE SLUMLORD Scummy guy who has been buying up cheap real estate throughout the neighborhood, not fixing it at all, and renting it out to college students for obscene prices His name has become an obscenity to the residents of the neighborhood Usually non- residents who disdain us, but make bank off this place Advertises himself everywhere, posters with his face on them and trash and branded with his name

Political Compass
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Constans I, the Twink Emperor of Rome | /r/PoliticalCompassMemes

Flavius Julius Constans probably would have had a couple million reddit karma Lived in Constantine's shadow was gay was VERY gay gave up territory like a bussy runt of the family Literally all he did was f--- men his father did not like him betrayed by his own legions SHE only redeeming quality is Constantine's son Heretic no mother had more sex than the average prostitute bottom "handsome barbarian hostages" terrible ruler
Flavius Julius Constans probably would have had a couple million reddit karma Lived in Constantine's shadow was gay was VERY gay gave up territory like a bussy runt of the family Literally all he did was f--- men his father did not like him betrayed by his own legions SHE only redeeming quality is Constantine's son Heretic no mother had more sex than the average prostitute bottom "handsome barbarian hostages" terrible ruler

Political Compass
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