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Not that guy

egobus boyfriend requirements: ⚫ is a feminist ⚫ not a racist dances (not necessarily well) ⚫ is a cutie ⚫ is not a murderer ⚫ likes puppies sociallysnapjodie yes cause obviously if someone is not a feminist they are obviously scum (sarcasm) finallyfrontiered Isn't that guy 432,484 notes

egobus boyfriend requirements: ⚫ is a feminist ⚫ not a racist dances (not necessarily well) ⚫ is a cutie ⚫ is not a murderer ⚫ likes puppies sociallysnapjodie yes cause obviously if someone is not a feminist they are obviously scum (sarcasm) finallyfrontiered Isn't that guy 432,484 notes

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The cats were right

mayu homunculus-argument Follow Oct 20 Things cats were right about all along: 1. Each staying hydrated by drinking enough water - eat! more! wet! food! (watermelon, cucumbers, SOUP!) 2. Feels great to be really high up in your house where you can see the whole place (loft bed loft bed loft bed loft bed!) 3. Express yourself as clearly as possible when people are touching you and you don't want them to. 4. Optional, but you can also express yourself clearly when your people are not touching you and you want them to. 5. Sometimes it's important to just go "hmm. actually, I don't care" and wander off. 6. You don't have to be the strongest or toughest to defend yourself, it's enough to just be difficult enough to not be worth the trouble. 7. Ghosts will eventually leave if you stare at them for long enough. #the wet food thing is legit 17,244 notes R D

mayu homunculus-argument Follow Oct 20 Things cats were right about all along: 1. Each staying hydrated by drinking enough water - eat! more! wet! food! (watermelon, cucumbers, SOUP!) 2. Feels great to be really high up in your house where you can see the whole place (loft bed loft bed loft bed loft bed!) 3. Express yourself as clearly as possible when people are touching you and you don't want them to. 4. Optional, but you can also express yourself clearly when your people are not touching you and you want them to. 5. Sometimes it's important to just go "hmm. actually, I don't care" and wander off. 6. You don't have to be the strongest or toughest to defend yourself, it's enough to just be difficult enough to not be worth the trouble. 7. Ghosts will eventually leave if you stare at them for long enough. #the wet food thing is legit 17,244 notes R D

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts cats

I don't like this

bananaquilava Pokémon designs that are "ugly" and mean "Gamefreak is running out of ideas" Pokémon designs that are "preferred" and "What pokémon are supposed to look like" Pokémon that make bad furry bait Guys I found the pattern. lotusmesenpai Pokémon that make good furry bait SKRITCH SKRITC SKR Sk game freak isnt running out of pokemon design ideas you guys are just furrys

bananaquilava Pokémon designs that are "ugly" and mean "Gamefreak is running out of ideas" Pokémon designs that are "preferred" and "What pokémon are supposed to look like" Pokémon that make bad furry bait Guys I found the pattern. lotusmesenpai Pokémon that make good furry bait SKRITCH SKRITC SKR Sk game freak isnt running out of pokemon design ideas you guys are just furrys

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts pokemon nintendo

How dare you?

wolfentwined Sep 11 this is who youre asking to work 40hrs per week btw

wolfentwined Sep 11 this is who youre asking to work 40hrs per week btw

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Math memes!

recuperationdisliker Follow Jan 12, 2023 ... f(x) tribute band called f'(x). you'd think the point would be to be derivative but it's actually quite easy to differentiate the two. recuperationdisliker Jan 12, 2023 fallingtowers 2023-01-12, 19:21:46 - 1 minute ago ... ALThi i don't know f about math. is this joke funny? no recuperationdisliker Ⓡ Jan 12, 2023 ... fallingtowers 2023-01-12, 19:26:42 - 3 minutes ago ALT is it ok if i reblog it anyway? yeah) fallingtowers Follow Jan 12, 2023 ... haha yayyyy :) i'm having such a wonderful time on the internet with you

recuperationdisliker Follow Jan 12, 2023 ... f(x) tribute band called f'(x). you'd think the point would be to be derivative but it's actually quite easy to differentiate the two. recuperationdisliker Jan 12, 2023 fallingtowers 2023-01-12, 19:21:46 - 1 minute ago ... ALThi i don't know f about math. is this joke funny? no recuperationdisliker Ⓡ Jan 12, 2023 ... fallingtowers 2023-01-12, 19:26:42 - 3 minutes ago ALT is it ok if i reblog it anyway? yeah) fallingtowers Follow Jan 12, 2023 ... haha yayyyy :) i'm having such a wonderful time on the internet with you

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They don't make 'em like they used to

tamagotchikgs ** Follow i m;iss when u could touch a tv and feel its fur theskydoesgreatthingsnow Follow When an old tv died it was always very understandable. Screen busted. Tubes broke. Animal sick. Smart TVs will have psychosomatic problems that clear within a day. Ur Apple TV gets mental illness. oarfjsh Follow tech used to die a honourable death of Blow Up The And Burn The House Down. now its all like waahh wahhhh mommy i camnot update :(( 129.289 notes Oct 24, 2024 C t 3

tamagotchikgs ** Follow i m;iss when u could touch a tv and feel its fur theskydoesgreatthingsnow Follow When an old tv died it was always very understandable. Screen busted. Tubes broke. Animal sick. Smart TVs will have psychosomatic problems that clear within a day. Ur Apple TV gets mental illness. oarfjsh Follow tech used to die a honourable death of Blow Up The And Burn The House Down. now its all like waahh wahhhh mommy i camnot update :(( 129.289 notes Oct 24, 2024 C t 3

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The joy and pain of the Internet

silverslipstream Follow Oct 9 worst part about the Internet is knowing that there are finally people who both match and complement your freak. the nearest one is 2,318.4 miles away and your time zones are awkward

silverslipstream Follow Oct 9 worst part about the Internet is knowing that there are finally people who both match and complement your freak. the nearest one is 2,318.4 miles away and your time zones are awkward

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts

Makes sense

the-old-homosexual-deactivated2 Can we talk about how in zombie shows/movies/ books they always find a veterinarian and not a surgeon? Are veterinarians deemed more likely to survive the apocalypse? Yup. drferox Follow One of our professional skills is 'not being bitten by patients' We actually have a good broad knowledge base for both surgical, medical, and GP things We're used to improvising equipment because a lot of stuff is just not made for animals Meat safety is part of our training Our cars are often full of equipment, especially in mixed practice We probably weren't in the human hospital at the initial outbreak

the-old-homosexual-deactivated2 Can we talk about how in zombie shows/movies/ books they always find a veterinarian and not a surgeon? Are veterinarians deemed more likely to survive the apocalypse? Yup. drferox Follow One of our professional skills is 'not being bitten by patients' We actually have a good broad knowledge base for both surgical, medical, and GP things We're used to improvising equipment because a lot of stuff is just not made for animals Meat safety is part of our training Our cars are often full of equipment, especially in mixed practice We probably weren't in the human hospital at the initial outbreak

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts apocalypse movies

Sibling-to-sibling dreams

sugar-on-sunday Follow Yesterday my little brother told me something very sweet and touching, that when he was a kid and had nightmares about monsters chasing him or whatever he would be able to end the nightmare by finding me in the dream and I would protect him by fighting off the zombies, or carrying him away. This is adorable, and makes me feel like the greatest older sibling in the world, but the hilarious thing is that when I was a kid I had nightmares of needing to save him from zombies and such. so many dreams where he was in trouble and I needed to save him. Like my nightmares began where his ended. Low key I think he mastered the ability to psychically transfer his nightmare to me as a child and I'm kind of annoyed with him.

sugar-on-sunday Follow Yesterday my little brother told me something very sweet and touching, that when he was a kid and had nightmares about monsters chasing him or whatever he would be able to end the nightmare by finding me in the dream and I would protect him by fighting off the zombies, or carrying him away. This is adorable, and makes me feel like the greatest older sibling in the world, but the hilarious thing is that when I was a kid I had nightmares of needing to save him from zombies and such. so many dreams where he was in trouble and I needed to save him. Like my nightmares began where his ended. Low key I think he mastered the ability to psychically transfer his nightmare to me as a child and I'm kind of annoyed with him.

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts dreams

They have a point...

doubleca5t Follow I mean on the one hand, yes, shipping spongebob characters is certifiably absurd and people who do it do not deserve rights but on the OTHER hand if you took Spongebob and Squidward's personalities and dropped them into, say, a pair of anime girls from a gacha game or two white guys from a teen drama everyone would be like "oh of COURSE this is a big ship" doubleca5t Follow glad to see everyone reading this post is just as upset as I was when I thought of it Source: doubleca5t

doubleca5t Follow I mean on the one hand, yes, shipping spongebob characters is certifiably absurd and people who do it do not deserve rights but on the OTHER hand if you took Spongebob and Squidward's personalities and dropped them into, say, a pair of anime girls from a gacha game or two white guys from a teen drama everyone would be like "oh of COURSE this is a big ship" doubleca5t Follow glad to see everyone reading this post is just as upset as I was when I thought of it Source: doubleca5t

tumblr /r/tumblr memes tumblr posts spongebob

Fair enough

god-offical 7 t sitten I have realized that most of my posts on this blog are no longer religious jokes To make up for this, I will be making a new rainbow, composed of 3 new colors never before seen: Djiuf, Bobbleboob, and Vietnam Those are the three new colors that'll be released soon, stay tuned attentiondeficitastartes 2t sitten Follow HOW ARE YOU WIDENING THE VISUAL SPECTER OF LIGHT??? ARE YOU GIVING US EYES THAT CAN PERCIEVE OTHER WAVELENGTHS? WHAT?? god-offical 8 min sitten I'm god. #said the lord 49 notes D

god-offical 7 t sitten I have realized that most of my posts on this blog are no longer religious jokes To make up for this, I will be making a new rainbow, composed of 3 new colors never before seen: Djiuf, Bobbleboob, and Vietnam Those are the three new colors that'll be released soon, stay tuned attentiondeficitastartes 2t sitten Follow HOW ARE YOU WIDENING THE VISUAL SPECTER OF LIGHT??? ARE YOU GIVING US EYES THAT CAN PERCIEVE OTHER WAVELENGTHS? WHAT?? god-offical 8 min sitten I'm god. #said the lord 49 notes D

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Adult friendship is weird

Follow Friendships as a teenager: we used to talk 5 hours every night now it's down to 3... are we still friends ? I wonder if they don't like me anymore Friendships as an adult: omg I've finally cleared up 20 minutes of my schedule to talk to my friend | haven't spoken to in 4 months #bffs #we will find eachother in every life I'm still so taken aback by people in the notes who claimed you need to be talking to people weekly or even daily to consider them your friend. how many people do you know? As an adult I feel like talking every day is sustainable with one person maybe 2 or 3 if your circumstances somehow are really conveniently aligned. yeah there's people I talk to often there's also people I don't talk to for 6 months because there's no way we'll be able to coordinate time and energy and I still consider them my friends because this is real life and there isn't a stardew valley esque hearts system based off of how many interactions we had this month #people saying you need to talk daily/weekly probably have about 3 friends total that they've known ... See all 88.4K notes

Follow Friendships as a teenager: we used to talk 5 hours every night now it's down to 3... are we still friends ? I wonder if they don't like me anymore Friendships as an adult: omg I've finally cleared up 20 minutes of my schedule to talk to my friend | haven't spoken to in 4 months #bffs #we will find eachother in every life I'm still so taken aback by people in the notes who claimed you need to be talking to people weekly or even daily to consider them your friend. how many people do you know? As an adult I feel like talking every day is sustainable with one person maybe 2 or 3 if your circumstances somehow are really conveniently aligned. yeah there's people I talk to often there's also people I don't talk to for 6 months because there's no way we'll be able to coordinate time and energy and I still consider them my friends because this is real life and there isn't a stardew valley esque hearts system based off of how many interactions we had this month #people saying you need to talk daily/weekly probably have about 3 friends total that they've known ... See all 88.4K notes

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The Ancient T-Shirt Cannon

thoodleoo KEE attended a talk on gladiatorial shows in rome and learned that prizes were sometimes thrown into the crowd for spectators to catch. and what i'm hearing from this is if we ever invent time travel we need to bring the ancient romans a t-shirt cannon #tagamemnon #queueusque tandem abutere catilinal patientia nostra

thoodleoo KEE attended a talk on gladiatorial shows in rome and learned that prizes were sometimes thrown into the crowd for spectators to catch. and what i'm hearing from this is if we ever invent time travel we need to bring the ancient romans a t-shirt cannon #tagamemnon #queueusque tandem abutere catilinal patientia nostra

rome t-shirt cannon

Tricks To Scare Your Parents

draconym Follow My tattoo artist told me his teenage son came out to him as trans by giving him a bunch of blue cupcakes and a greeting card that said "it's a boy!" "That's cute," I said. "It was NOT cute!" he snapped. "I thought he was pregnant." 12,343 notes D

draconym Follow My tattoo artist told me his teenage son came out to him as trans by giving him a bunch of blue cupcakes and a greeting card that said "it's a boy!" "That's cute," I said. "It was NOT cute!" he snapped. "I thought he was pregnant." 12,343 notes D

Papa, I Am Near Drained

log6 Follow May 21 had a dream that I had a pair of headphones whose "low battery" sound was a weak and hacking dry cough

log6 Follow May 21 had a dream that I had a pair of headphones whose "low battery" sound was a weak and hacking dry cough

headphones weak

Family Feud Takes A Dark Turn

toskarin Jul 26 steve harvey: what's the worst thing a man can hear from his friend? <buzz!> contestant: demon sword technique, quickening of the soul? steve harvey, face settling into a bitter smirk: it's been so long... but I could never forget. to do so would be to lose him all over again. <board turns over to reveal the top answer, sound system playing only the cries of distant carrion crows and the low roar of winter>

toskarin Jul 26 steve harvey: what's the worst thing a man can hear from his friend? <buzz!> contestant: demon sword technique, quickening of the soul? steve harvey, face settling into a bitter smirk: it's been so long... but I could never forget. to do so would be to lose him all over again. <board turns over to reveal the top answer, sound system playing only the cries of distant carrion crows and the low roar of winter>

demon sword steve harvey family feud

The Helpful Clock

dddreamscape 4 Follow Oct 1 Me: I wonder what time it is. The humble analog clock: 11,796 notes о

dddreamscape 4 Follow Oct 1 Me: I wonder what time it is. The humble analog clock: 11,796 notes о

Too Dumb To Be Dumb

bluef00t Follow "you talk like a smart/pretentious person" actually I just forget simple words constantly and am forced to rummage through my brain for the nearest synonym, which is usually twice as long and needlessly specific #chariots chariots 40,263 notes 17 3

bluef00t Follow "you talk like a smart/pretentious person" actually I just forget simple words constantly and am forced to rummage through my brain for the nearest synonym, which is usually twice as long and needlessly specific #chariots chariots 40,263 notes 17 3

words pretentious

Hee Hee

spineless-lobster Follow Jan 5 I am not the divine masculine or the divine feminine I am the divine comedy and you will address me as such fabledquill Follow Jan 6 pronouns: hee/hee

spineless-lobster Follow Jan 5 I am not the divine masculine or the divine feminine I am the divine comedy and you will address me as such fabledquill Follow Jan 6 pronouns: hee/hee

It'll Change Your Life

transmechanicus reblogged jenlog Oct 16 psychotic-gerard Oct 6 Follow ... when i was 14 i came out to a highschool teacher as transgender and i believe i was the first transgender person he ever talked to, and i suppose he panicked, because all he did was say "i think you should listen to little lion man by mumford and sons," and i did, and it changed my 14 year old mind, but i am still unsure what his intended message. he was cool with me being transgender though. mariposakitten Oct 13 Follow "No idea what to say about the transgender stuff, but I heard a banger the other day you might like." 29,190 notes D

transmechanicus reblogged jenlog Oct 16 psychotic-gerard Oct 6 Follow ... when i was 14 i came out to a highschool teacher as transgender and i believe i was the first transgender person he ever talked to, and i suppose he panicked, because all he did was say "i think you should listen to little lion man by mumford and sons," and i did, and it changed my 14 year old mind, but i am still unsure what his intended message. he was cool with me being transgender though. mariposakitten Oct 13 Follow "No idea what to say about the transgender stuff, but I heard a banger the other day you might like." 29,190 notes D

mumford and sons little lion man