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I'll go to disgusting lengths for my character's backstory pt.2 | /r/dndmemes

WANNA SEE ME DO SOMETHING STUPID? imgflip.com, MAGUS+ROGUE+ARCANIST +WIZARD VARIANT MULTICLASS WANNA SEE ME DO IT AGAIN?
WANNA SEE ME DO SOMETHING STUPID? imgflip.com, MAGUS+ROGUE+ARCANIST +WIZARD VARIANT MULTICLASS WANNA SEE ME DO IT AGAIN?

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My LE Warlock/Rogue: YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE A BAD TIME | /r/dndmemes

imgflip.com 10 ME CASTING HOLD PERSON ON 3 DIFFERENT PEOPLE WHILE MY NPC ASSASSSIN BUDDY AMBUSHES THEM THE LOLTHITE DROW WHO REGRET BEING DEMON WORSHIPPERS THAT DAY
imgflip.com 10 ME CASTING HOLD PERSON ON 3 DIFFERENT PEOPLE WHILE MY NPC ASSASSSIN BUDDY AMBUSHES THEM THE LOLTHITE DROW WHO REGRET BEING DEMON WORSHIPPERS THAT DAY

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Every time... | /r/dndmemes

Me WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT PATHFINDER? New TTRPG Player WE HATE IT DAP Comic by lightroastcomics. Meme by @EasyModeStart I DON'T KNOW, LET ME GO FIND OUT I HATE IT
Me WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT PATHFINDER? New TTRPG Player WE HATE IT DAP Comic by lightroastcomics. Meme by @EasyModeStart I DON'T KNOW, LET ME GO FIND OUT I HATE IT

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Alternative Starts

: Anonymous 378 KB PNG 03/02/23(Thu)11:15:39 No.87915652 Is there anything that's actually wrong with the classic tavern start, or is avoiding it one of those things uppity try to push because everything needs to be a creative masterpiece? Cause it sounds to me like a pretend-to-get-mad-for-upvotes meme like comic sans. : Anonymous >So, you're all in a tavern 03/02/23(Thu)11:46:11 No.87915998 >>87915652 (OP) # Its a bit cliché. There are more unique ways to start your campaign. > You meet upon the road to a major city > You escape a jail together > You are the survivors of a massive attack/battle > You were kidnapped by bandits > You grew up in the same town/village > You were teleported to a weird Demiplane > You were hired by the same guy > You met in a brothel
: Anonymous 378 KB PNG 03/02/23(Thu)11:15:39 No.87915652 Is there anything that's actually wrong with the classic tavern start, or is avoiding it one of those things uppity try to push because everything needs to be a creative masterpiece? Cause it sounds to me like a pretend-to-get-mad-for-upvotes meme like comic sans. : Anonymous >So, you're all in a tavern 03/02/23(Thu)11:46:11 No.87915998 >>87915652 (OP) # Its a bit cliché. There are more unique ways to start your campaign. > You meet upon the road to a major city > You escape a jail together > You are the survivors of a massive attack/battle > You were kidnapped by bandits > You grew up in the same town/village > You were teleported to a weird Demiplane > You were hired by the same guy > You met in a brothel

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How to Play Evil

: Anonymous Alignments? 30 KB PNG 03/03/23(Fri)16:04:13 No.87929707 How does one go about playing a Chaotic/Evil character without ruining a campaign for the other players and the DM? I trend toward Lawful/Good but have been wanting to give CE a shot but don't want to mess with other people's fun. 03/03/23(Fri)18:34:56 No.87931188 : Anonymous >>87929707 (OP) # Its a very thin line to walk when you're playing CE when everyone else is a Lawful or good alignment. My advice would be to play it like a S Squad member. Luckily i had a character just like that. > Had a CE warlock > Got caught by town guards sacrificing citizens to my patron (Asmodeus) > was arrested and sentenced to death > before my sentence could be carried out, the kingdom got attacked by Demons > Luckily my warlock was a very prominent demonologist > King offered me a deal, Help put a stop to the demon scourge and I would be banished instead of killed > My warlock took the offer > the king did have insurance on me by putting me in the custody of a group of adventurers > they were tasked with killing me if i was to step out of line. > had a fun time with that group for about a year and a half.
: Anonymous Alignments? 30 KB PNG 03/03/23(Fri)16:04:13 No.87929707 How does one go about playing a Chaotic/Evil character without ruining a campaign for the other players and the DM? I trend toward Lawful/Good but have been wanting to give CE a shot but don't want to mess with other people's fun. 03/03/23(Fri)18:34:56 No.87931188 : Anonymous >>87929707 (OP) # Its a very thin line to walk when you're playing CE when everyone else is a Lawful or good alignment. My advice would be to play it like a S Squad member. Luckily i had a character just like that. > Had a CE warlock > Got caught by town guards sacrificing citizens to my patron (Asmodeus) > was arrested and sentenced to death > before my sentence could be carried out, the kingdom got attacked by Demons > Luckily my warlock was a very prominent demonologist > King offered me a deal, Help put a stop to the demon scourge and I would be banished instead of killed > My warlock took the offer > the king did have insurance on me by putting me in the custody of a group of adventurers > they were tasked with killing me if i was to step out of line. > had a fun time with that group for about a year and a half.

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Party Defeats a Mountain With Animal Cruelty

File: rip tortle.jpg (14 KB, 572x547) Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)10:49:10 No.86876372 ► A funny story from a game I'm in that I wanted to share with you all (also my first actual greentext, so sorry for if there are any errors made) >Be me >Be playing 5e with heavy homebrew >Traveling from our town to a neighboring country to do some good ol diplomacy >End up taking a shortcut through the snowy mountains to cut a few days off our journey >Big mistake >After investigating some weird noises, we end up finding an ice/earth elemental hybrid the size of a mountain beating a giant to death >Genuinely consider retreating >Wizard then gets an idea >He goes up to the mountain creature and casts polymorph on it >DM rolls poorly >Mountain is now turtle >Being as dumb as we are, we decide that we want to kill this thing to get a milestone level up >Warlock gets a great idea >Lad is a demon that has a 30ft flying speed (homebrew race the DM gave him) >He picks up the turtle and flies 200ft into the air >Drops it >Turtle takes 20d6 fall damage which carries over into its mountain form which had its turn skipped because of the wizards's shenanigans >We decide to try this again >DM rolls horribly >DM facepalms >We repeat this process 2 more times >We even dop our artificer's steel defender (in the form of a metal capybara) on top of it dealing 30d6 bludgeoning >This broke the steel defender >Artificer gains temp madness after seeing their boy crash into a million bits >Mountain is still not dead after all this >DM then gets his one turn during the entire fight >Only hits 2 of us and does a third of our hp >Next round we finish it using the same bs method >DM later admitted that he had added 100 extra hp to the thing before the fight because we keep doing s--- like this Gravity is busted
File: rip tortle.jpg (14 KB, 572x547) Anonymous 11/29/22(Tue)10:49:10 No.86876372 ► A funny story from a game I'm in that I wanted to share with you all (also my first actual greentext, so sorry for if there are any errors made) >Be me >Be playing 5e with heavy homebrew >Traveling from our town to a neighboring country to do some good ol diplomacy >End up taking a shortcut through the snowy mountains to cut a few days off our journey >Big mistake >After investigating some weird noises, we end up finding an ice/earth elemental hybrid the size of a mountain beating a giant to death >Genuinely consider retreating >Wizard then gets an idea >He goes up to the mountain creature and casts polymorph on it >DM rolls poorly >Mountain is now turtle >Being as dumb as we are, we decide that we want to kill this thing to get a milestone level up >Warlock gets a great idea >Lad is a demon that has a 30ft flying speed (homebrew race the DM gave him) >He picks up the turtle and flies 200ft into the air >Drops it >Turtle takes 20d6 fall damage which carries over into its mountain form which had its turn skipped because of the wizards's shenanigans >We decide to try this again >DM rolls horribly >DM facepalms >We repeat this process 2 more times >We even dop our artificer's steel defender (in the form of a metal capybara) on top of it dealing 30d6 bludgeoning >This broke the steel defender >Artificer gains temp madness after seeing their boy crash into a million bits >Mountain is still not dead after all this >DM then gets his one turn during the entire fight >Only hits 2 of us and does a third of our hp >Next round we finish it using the same bs method >DM later admitted that he had added 100 extra hp to the thing before the fight because we keep doing s--- like this Gravity is busted

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Anon's DM Has a Trick Up His Sleeve

DM: In the corner of the room, you see a chest rocking violently back and forth, as if something inside is trying to get out. Druid: I roll Perception to see if the chest is a mimic. 21. DM: Although mimics are indistinguishable from inanimate objects, you get the sense that it wouldn't be loudly announcing its presence like this. Bard: I go forward and unlatch the chest. DM: A smoke mephit flies out and blasts smouldering ash at you. Make a Dex save. Rogue: Can I move forward to help Bard? DM: Sure, as you push past the door, you find that your hand is suddenly glued to it. The door grows eyes. And teeth. Druid: Uh oh... DM: DOOR MIMIC, ! ROLL INITIATIVE!
DM: In the corner of the room, you see a chest rocking violently back and forth, as if something inside is trying to get out. Druid: I roll Perception to see if the chest is a mimic. 21. DM: Although mimics are indistinguishable from inanimate objects, you get the sense that it wouldn't be loudly announcing its presence like this. Bard: I go forward and unlatch the chest. DM: A smoke mephit flies out and blasts smouldering ash at you. Make a Dex save. Rogue: Can I move forward to help Bard? DM: Sure, as you push past the door, you find that your hand is suddenly glued to it. The door grows eyes. And teeth. Druid: Uh oh... DM: DOOR MIMIC, ! ROLL INITIATIVE!

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So Much Money, So Little Time

File: bonbibonkers.jpg (132 KB, 970x982) Anonymous 03/31/23(Fri)14:42:44 No.88271030 >>88271047 >>88271521 >>88271559 >>88271590 >>88271612 >>88272227 >>88272816 >>88273128 >>88273210 >>88273409 >>88273653 >>88274352 >>88274410 >>88274434 >>88274570 >>88274604 >grow up >all my friends get wage slave jobs with ever-changing timetables >it's now impossible to have a regular game with them What's the solution to this? □ Anonymous 03/31/23(Fri)15:23:27 No.88271546 ► >>88273665 >>88273801 >>88274369 File: 1679083849151426.gif (2.3 MB, 320x320) >be me >no friends >still buy and collect board games and rpgs >sometimes I open the boxes and set them up and imagine playing them
File: bonbibonkers.jpg (132 KB, 970x982) Anonymous 03/31/23(Fri)14:42:44 No.88271030 >>88271047 >>88271521 >>88271559 >>88271590 >>88271612 >>88272227 >>88272816 >>88273128 >>88273210 >>88273409 >>88273653 >>88274352 >>88274410 >>88274434 >>88274570 >>88274604 >grow up >all my friends get wage slave jobs with ever-changing timetables >it's now impossible to have a regular game with them What's the solution to this? □ Anonymous 03/31/23(Fri)15:23:27 No.88271546 ► >>88273665 >>88273801 >>88274369 File: 1679083849151426.gif (2.3 MB, 320x320) >be me >no friends >still buy and collect board games and rpgs >sometimes I open the boxes and set them up and imagine playing them

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Anon Wants to Be the Antihero

Anonymous 03/28/23(Tue)00:56:36 No.88223480 >>88225392 >>88226394 >>88226410 >start superhero game in this generic system just to try it out, Forthright >first mission is against a guy who wants to blow up the city, goes well enough >ask the players what they want to do in downtime >cryo wizard guy wants to research cryotechnology >speedster wants to travel the world >telepath wants to stream as a VTuber totally disconnected from real persona or superhero persona >guy whose only power is being good with guns wants to return to his old middle school and shoot it up >"It's what my character would do now that he has gun powers, you said we could be antiheroes"
Anonymous 03/28/23(Tue)00:56:36 No.88223480 >>88225392 >>88226394 >>88226410 >start superhero game in this generic system just to try it out, Forthright >first mission is against a guy who wants to blow up the city, goes well enough >ask the players what they want to do in downtime >cryo wizard guy wants to research cryotechnology >speedster wants to travel the world >telepath wants to stream as a VTuber totally disconnected from real persona or superhero persona >guy whose only power is being good with guns wants to return to his old middle school and shoot it up >"It's what my character would do now that he has gun powers, you said we could be antiheroes"

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Anon's Group Members Are Masochists

: Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)14:24:27 No.87893817 ok then.gif 3.01 MB GIF >bored with 5e after playing it for years >make "that guy: the character" to try to spice things up >loud, obnoxious, chaotic tendencies, everything that you would hate at your table >fully expect to get told to bring it down a notch or to pick a different character my group loves the character instead >>87893988 # >>87894088 # >>87894130 #
: Anonymous 02/28/23(Tue)14:24:27 No.87893817 ok then.gif 3.01 MB GIF >bored with 5e after playing it for years >make "that guy: the character" to try to spice things up >loud, obnoxious, chaotic tendencies, everything that you would hate at your table >fully expect to get told to bring it down a notch or to pick a different character my group loves the character instead >>87893988 # >>87894088 # >>87894130 #

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Anon Shoves Himself

: Anonymous Pedantic RAW rulings crunchyroll 11/23/22 (Wed)18:23:08 No.86821279 Are you sad that your childhood friend will be gone? 5DF80844-AB0C-46D8-A30D-248FC317F83A.jpg 626 KB JPG GROOM SONGSMOTO Post your favorite examples of stupid rules as written rulings for abilities or effects, any game or edition is applicable. >Another player takes the Telekinetic feat >Player takes his first turn this session and wants to use his BA on it >Player: Ok, I'll use telekinetic to move myself 5 feet away. >DM: So you want to shove yourself away from yourself? >Player: Yes >DM: Are you sure? >Player: I said yes! >DM: Ok, you explode with all of your chunks falling five feet away from your previous location
: Anonymous Pedantic RAW rulings crunchyroll 11/23/22 (Wed)18:23:08 No.86821279 Are you sad that your childhood friend will be gone? 5DF80844-AB0C-46D8-A30D-248FC317F83A.jpg 626 KB JPG GROOM SONGSMOTO Post your favorite examples of stupid rules as written rulings for abilities or effects, any game or edition is applicable. >Another player takes the Telekinetic feat >Player takes his first turn this session and wants to use his BA on it >Player: Ok, I'll use telekinetic to move myself 5 feet away. >DM: So you want to shove yourself away from yourself? >Player: Yes >DM: Are you sure? >Player: I said yes! >DM: Ok, you explode with all of your chunks falling five feet away from your previous location

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Anon Isn't Too Fond of Dice Towers

: Anonymous HATE DICE TOWERS 04/12/23(Wed) 21:19:11 No.88424209 >its your turn what are you going to do? >im gonna ahh ahh im gonna ahh | guess im gonna ahh make an attack roll!? >takes hand out of dorito bag moves it towards his pile of $2 dice sets he 233 KB JPG bought of alibaba >takes 30 seconds to shuffle through it until he finally picks up his cheap glittery orange d20 >moves his fat paw slowly to the top of his crappy wooden dice tower and spends another 30 seconds trying to jam it through >finally goes in >CLACK! >CLACK! >CLACK! >CLACK! >RATTLE >does a roll of 4 hit? no...? oh well
: Anonymous HATE DICE TOWERS 04/12/23(Wed) 21:19:11 No.88424209 >its your turn what are you going to do? >im gonna ahh ahh im gonna ahh | guess im gonna ahh make an attack roll!? >takes hand out of dorito bag moves it towards his pile of $2 dice sets he 233 KB JPG bought of alibaba >takes 30 seconds to shuffle through it until he finally picks up his cheap glittery orange d20 >moves his fat paw slowly to the top of his crappy wooden dice tower and spends another 30 seconds trying to jam it through >finally goes in >CLACK! >CLACK! >CLACK! >CLACK! >RATTLE >does a roll of 4 hit? no...? oh well

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Anon and the Paladin

Anonymous 94 KB JPG Anonymous 04/03/23 (Mon)07:29:34 No.88302825 Does your paladin believe that bad people can change their ways if given enough guidance? 04/03/23 (Mon)16:39:54 No.88308965 >>88302825 (OP) # > Be me, Urchin > grew up in a rough neighborhood > had to do things that would make your average edgy rogue cringe > learned to pickpocket when i was 4 81 KB JPG > committed my first assault at 9 > killed my first man at 12 > was constantly in and out of jail my entire childhood > I was jaded towards the world and believed that it was all a joke > then one day when i was locked up a man came into the jailhouse > he wore the most beautiful set of plate armor > he carried an amazing longsword that seemed to be glowing > he looked like one of those traveling Adventurers > but what most shocked me was the fact he spoke to me as a person > he told me about how he once was like me > how he would lie, cheat, even kill in order to live. > he told me he was a rotten husk of a man > but he told me how his eyes were opened and how he saw the error of his ways > how he became a Paladin and took the Oath of Redemption > he then asked if i was willing to take that path with him > i was taken aback, unsure if he was serious > I thought about it but it didn't take me long > i decided right then and there what i was > I approached this man and got really close > I then proceeded to stab him reportedly in the throat > as the life left his eyes I whispered in his ear, "Thug life
Anonymous 94 KB JPG Anonymous 04/03/23 (Mon)07:29:34 No.88302825 Does your paladin believe that bad people can change their ways if given enough guidance? 04/03/23 (Mon)16:39:54 No.88308965 >>88302825 (OP) # > Be me, Urchin > grew up in a rough neighborhood > had to do things that would make your average edgy rogue cringe > learned to pickpocket when i was 4 81 KB JPG > committed my first assault at 9 > killed my first man at 12 > was constantly in and out of jail my entire childhood > I was jaded towards the world and believed that it was all a joke > then one day when i was locked up a man came into the jailhouse > he wore the most beautiful set of plate armor > he carried an amazing longsword that seemed to be glowing > he looked like one of those traveling Adventurers > but what most shocked me was the fact he spoke to me as a person > he told me about how he once was like me > how he would lie, cheat, even kill in order to live. > he told me he was a rotten husk of a man > but he told me how his eyes were opened and how he saw the error of his ways > how he became a Paladin and took the Oath of Redemption > he then asked if i was willing to take that path with him > i was taken aback, unsure if he was serious > I thought about it but it didn't take me long > i decided right then and there what i was > I approached this man and got really close > I then proceeded to stab him reportedly in the throat > as the life left his eyes I whispered in his ear, "Thug life

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Anon's DM Is Petty

Anonymous 53 KB PNG 11/29/22(Tue)14:04:13 No.86878406 Petty DM stories. I'll start. > Be Me > Be playing Totem Warrior Barbarian > Pick Bear because enjoy being the damage sponge so squishy team members survive encounters. > DM pits us up against a group of bandits > bandit hits me with sword > DM tells me i take 10 points of damage > remind him im raging and I would take half > DM: Oh no, his Sword deals psychic damage instead of slashing. > confused but say ok > next bandit hits with fire bolt > DM tells me they used a transmute meta magic to change it to psychic > start feeling targeted > next bandit punches me > SOMEHOW it also deals psychic damage > call shenanigans > DM tells me im only whining about nothing. > he then says that the bandit's dog bites me and deals 2d8 psychic damage. > MFW
Anonymous 53 KB PNG 11/29/22(Tue)14:04:13 No.86878406 Petty DM stories. I'll start. > Be Me > Be playing Totem Warrior Barbarian > Pick Bear because enjoy being the damage sponge so squishy team members survive encounters. > DM pits us up against a group of bandits > bandit hits me with sword > DM tells me i take 10 points of damage > remind him im raging and I would take half > DM: Oh no, his Sword deals psychic damage instead of slashing. > confused but say ok > next bandit hits with fire bolt > DM tells me they used a transmute meta magic to change it to psychic > start feeling targeted > next bandit punches me > SOMEHOW it also deals psychic damage > call shenanigans > DM tells me im only whining about nothing. > he then says that the bandit's dog bites me and deals 2d8 psychic damage. > MFW

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Underage PCs

Anonymous 1.06 MB JPG 02/28/23(Tue)23:36:10 No.87899457 Do you as a DM let players play characters under the age of 18? 03/01/23(Wed)09:08:06 No.87902863 Anonymous >>87899457 (OP) # I do, but i do have rules for them > The Character cannot be allowed to seduce, flirt with, or romance NPCs (or vice versa) as its kinda weird. > The Character shouldn't drink Alcohol or should be considered a lightweight when consuming alcohol. > The Character must have an explanation for why they are adventuring at a young age. > The Character shouldn't be allowed to consume drugs or performance enhancing substances. > The Character cannot sign contracts or be the face of the group. > The Character must have a stat below average as they are not fully grown. > The Character must become an adult halfway or near the end of the campaign.
Anonymous 1.06 MB JPG 02/28/23(Tue)23:36:10 No.87899457 Do you as a DM let players play characters under the age of 18? 03/01/23(Wed)09:08:06 No.87902863 Anonymous >>87899457 (OP) # I do, but i do have rules for them > The Character cannot be allowed to seduce, flirt with, or romance NPCs (or vice versa) as its kinda weird. > The Character shouldn't drink Alcohol or should be considered a lightweight when consuming alcohol. > The Character must have an explanation for why they are adventuring at a young age. > The Character shouldn't be allowed to consume drugs or performance enhancing substances. > The Character cannot sign contracts or be the face of the group. > The Character must have a stat below average as they are not fully grown. > The Character must become an adult halfway or near the end of the campaign.

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Anon Outsmarts Metagamers

04/01/23(Sat) 23:23:05 No.88288445 >You knock Rictavio's hat off? >He seems quite upset and demands you apologize as he dusts off his hat. >You want to kill Vasili? Roll initiative. >The villagers seem quite upset you've killed an innocent man. >No, there's no trap there. >No treasure in that chest. 291 KB PNG : Anonymous >Were you expecting something else to happen, dear player? Surely you weren't reading ahead in the book. : Anonymous 122 KB JPG >>88288560 # 04/01/23(Sat) 23:31:09 No.88288508 NOO000000 YOU'RE CHANGING THE ADVENTURE PATH NOOOOO000 CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA
04/01/23(Sat) 23:23:05 No.88288445 >You knock Rictavio's hat off? >He seems quite upset and demands you apologize as he dusts off his hat. >You want to kill Vasili? Roll initiative. >The villagers seem quite upset you've killed an innocent man. >No, there's no trap there. >No treasure in that chest. 291 KB PNG : Anonymous >Were you expecting something else to happen, dear player? Surely you weren't reading ahead in the book. : Anonymous 122 KB JPG >>88288560 # 04/01/23(Sat) 23:31:09 No.88288508 NOO000000 YOU'RE CHANGING THE ADVENTURE PATH NOOOOO000 CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA CHUGGA

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