Wouldst Thou Like A Taste Of Santa's Yumnuts?

It's November, which means that it's time for marketing teams to get unnecessarily and unintentionally horny for the holidays.

This season, the world of horny Christmas ads was kicked off by Marks and Spencer's, a British clothing, home goods, and food product retail chain, who proudly tweeted this morning, "Who wants a bite of Santa’s Yumnut™?"

Who wants a bite of Santa’s Yumnut™? Our yum yum-doughnut hybrids have been given a Christmassy makeover, with delicious flaky pastry layers and a sweet Santa’s belt topping. Find them in our in store bakery. pic.twitter.com/BcWwxOo26r

— M&S (@marksandspencer) November 5, 2020

"Santa's Yumnut," as you can see, is not what the words "Santa's Yumnut" likely generated in your head, and is instead a doughnut. Mark's and Spencer's, or M&S, revealed a new pastry called the "Yumnut" earlier this year. The "Yumnut" is a cross between a "yum yum," a kind of pastry made with twisted doughnut dough and glaze, and a traditional doughnut.

While "Yumnut" by itself is a funny word to say, it is significantly grosser-sounding when you make it "Santa's Yumnut." The holiday confection will have flaky pastry layers and icing made to look like Santa's belt. While this admittedly looks tasty, the idea of putting one's head into Santa's belt to get a taste of his delicious yumnut perturbed some onlookers.

'Who wants a bite of Santa's Yumnut?' is simultaneously the best and worst sentence of all time https://t.co/O1Nh369ZOC

— Fred Delicious (@Fred_Delicious) November 5, 2020

I hear Santa's Yumnut goes particularly well with Seamen's Nutkum pic.twitter.com/6MZDM5Urxx

— Nicolas Chinardet (@zefrog) November 5, 2020

Santa’s YUMNUT? FuckSake are you going with that then? YUMNUT? https://t.co/f877LkGRXG

— Janey Godley (@JaneyGodley) November 5, 2020

my friends @ me after the disgraceful yumnut post pic.twitter.com/sAsfWmHYku

— sarawyn is writing ✍️😰 (@saraisverytired) November 5, 2020

how can this many of you think the people marketing the "Santa's Yumnut" did not choose that name on purpose, I refuse to believe such a proportion of my acquaintance is this naive

— Daniel M. Lavery (@daniel_m_lavery) November 5, 2020

Happy ho-ho-hornydays, everyone.