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Follow Hasan Minhaj @hasanminha Before they write #RaceTogether on cups, can Starbucks just spell my name correctly? #SahanMinha #HansonMinaja #Saddam Hussain 10:40 AM - 17 Mar 2015 98 RETWEETS 128 FAVORITES

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Joke #1


Uploaded by Brad Mar 18, 2015 at 05:47PM EDT

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Origin Entry: #RaceTogether

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hecran servat So, I went to my local Starbucks to indulge in a rare delicacy for me-A venti caramel carob macchiato with quinoa and all-organic, fair-trade espress0 Upon ordering, and pulling out my debit card to settle my bill of $278.96 (their recently, yay!), the young proletariat behind the till politely asked, "Would you like to have a conversation about race today? I was startled. Surely, this, a simple coffeehaus, was not so intellectually inclined? But, out of curiosity and a genuine interest, I said, "Sure! The young lady gave me a toothy grin, anticipating my topic of choice. For a moment, I froze, but then offered a subject I had been reading on recently "Have you any opinions.." I began quietly, "on the recent Islamic siege against the Yazidi people in the middle east? They're being enslaved and slaughtered in massive nu"stopped when the look in the young woman's eyes changed to reflect sheer, unadulterated emptiness. The smile was still there but had softened "Forget that." I started again, and the smile perked back up. "Maybe you've heard of the current Saudi Arabian tragedies, in which Indians are being imported for manual labor with the promise of food and money, but are being terribly treated, barely paid anything, and dumped over the Indian border if they fall ill or wea" Once again I halted I realized, in horror, that the cashier was giving me a look of concern as if everything that had come out of my mouth was hardly in English, let alone understandable. The smile was gone, her brows were furrowed, and I quickly realized that the other baristas were staring as if I had experienced a stroke right before them "Ahh... Uhmm." I felt quite awkward now. And the line forming behind me was making me sweat a bit in nervousness. "The... The Chinese Colonization Of Africa?" Somewhere behind me, a woman began softly sobbing. That was when l realized the entire café was staring at me. One of the other baristas darted away into the back quickly, holding his mouth as if he was about to vomit. The young woman behind the cash register seemed to be leaning into the counter, my background in criminology told me she was reaching for a panic button Think, Anna, think...'I chided myself internally. I needed to make a comeback and deescalate the situation. Now Taking a deep breath, I decided to dust off a language I hadn't spoken in many years. I knew it would be rusty, but I had no other options I lifted my hands above my head, elbows bent lazily "White man bad! White man hurt!" I grunted primitively, swaying from side to side, "White man kill!" A collective sigh of relief seemed to pulsate throughout the Starbucks. The young barista held her chest in elation, as if some terrible wrong had been done justice. She ended her reach for the panic button, and instead grabbed the cup that had been sitting to her side for the past few minutes It was my organic kale carrot Aboriginal-picked matcha and pine gluten-free latte She handed me my receipt for the $451 beverage, along side my drink and cleared her throat "Have a good day, ma'am."
"link":http://8ch.net/pol/res/1522931.html
"link":http://8ch.net/pol/res/1522931.html
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Uploaded Mar 18, 2015 at 05:47PM EDT

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#RaceTogether

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