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Cousin Pepe

"I use work for Mister Trump. He pay me grow peyote for him. One time he offer me money to have sex with his wife. He watch from corner and choke himself with a bed sheet. Every night he'd have his driver drop me off at Home Depot. I always drove to work every day for him in my own car...he thought that's where I lived."

"I use work for Mister Trump. He pay me grow peyote for him. One time he offer me money to have sex with his wife. He watch from corner and choke himself with a bed sheet. Every night he'd have his driver drop me off at Home Depot. I always drove to work every day for him in my own car...he thought that's where I lived."

Muppet Meth Lab

After burning down his third mobile home, Beaker realized that making meth would be more complicated than he thought.

After burning down his third mobile home, Beaker realized that making meth would be more complicated than he thought.

beaker meth lab

No Elmo! No!

SESAME STREET org With the help of ISIS, Elmo prepares to trycycle bomb the new world trade center.

SESAME STREET org With the help of ISIS, Elmo prepares to trycycle bomb the new world trade center.

Expecting Jojo comments

"Reddit Source":https://www.reddit.com/r/bertstrips/comments/40i45k/their_screams_echoed_through_his_head_the_the/

"Reddit Source":https://www.reddit.com/r/bertstrips/comments/40i45k/their_screams_echoed_through_his_head_the_the/

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Me Keep Moving Forward...

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/SD3K4uo

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/SD3K4uo

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Cookies

Actually innocent. Wow.

Actually innocent. Wow.

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Night of the Living Bort

Bert sat up abruptly. He had just heard the unmistakable sound of Bort's autistic laughter coming from the kitchen, followed by the sound of metal hitting the floor-tiles. But that was impossible. He and Ernie had drowned the little retard themselves yesterday, and today they had used his flesh for the hamburgers at Elmo's birthday barbucue. Bert slowly turned to look at Ernie, who was now wide awake and trembling with fear under the covers beside him, then back at the closed door to their bedroom. He heard the laughter again, closer this time, and could only watch in horror as the knob began to turn

Bert sat up abruptly. He had just heard the unmistakable sound of Bort's autistic laughter coming from the kitchen, followed by the sound of metal hitting the floor-tiles. But that was impossible. He and Ernie had drowned the little retard themselves yesterday, and today they had used his flesh for the hamburgers at Elmo's birthday barbucue. Bert slowly turned to look at Ernie, who was now wide awake and trembling with fear under the covers beside him, then back at the closed door to their bedroom. He heard the laughter again, closer this time, and could only watch in horror as the knob began to turn

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Goddammit Ernie!

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/fDcwg8P

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/fDcwg8P

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ART!

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/BUFppkq

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/BUFppkq

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Ernie and Plants

"I like to use my victims as fertilizer to grow small plants, which I then send to the victim's family as a condolence present. Most people neglect potted plants they receive as gifts. So, in a way, it's like they're letting their children die all over again."

"I like to use my victims as fertilizer to grow small plants, which I then send to the victim's family as a condolence present. Most people neglect potted plants they receive as gifts. So, in a way, it's like they're letting their children die all over again."

ernie sesame street plants fertilizer victims death

The Landlady of Sesame Street

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/DoaP1ow

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/DoaP1ow

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MonMusu.chapter33.png

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/WWwkzA3

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/WWwkzA3

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Bert's White Christmas

No, Bert. Bing Crosby's White Christmas" is not about ethnic cleansing

No, Bert. Bing Crosby's White Christmas" is not about ethnic cleansing

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Bert's Book of Victims.

While flipping through his trophy album, Bert has a good chuckle as he comes across that victim who had soiled himself during strangulation. He had totally forgotten about that one.

While flipping through his trophy album, Bert has a good chuckle as he comes across that victim who had soiled himself during strangulation. He had totally forgotten about that one.

bert strangulation book

Ernie is a liar.

Ernie said he took care of the snipers. But about two seconds into his run, Bert learned that Ernie was a f------ liar.

Ernie said he took care of the snipers. But about two seconds into his run, Bert learned that Ernie was a f------ liar.

bert ernie sniper

Oh my...

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/nAnR3QM

"Imgur":http://imgur.com/nAnR3QM

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