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FemAnon is straight | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/22/18(Thu)21:17:14 No.785518594 >be me >be femAnon >everyone says that girls can just go out and get guys >lwantthat.png >goes out to club, I put effort into everything, new dress, new heels, 59 KB JPG makeup and perfume >timetogetlaid.jpg >be 2 hours after I get there >not one guy asked me out >get asked out by 4 lesbians Why did you guys lie? 24 Replies / 3 Images View Thread
: Anonymous 11/22/18(Thu)21:17:14 No.785518594 >be me >be femAnon >everyone says that girls can just go out and get guys >lwantthat.png >goes out to club, I put effort into everything, new dress, new heels, 59 KB JPG makeup and perfume >timetogetlaid.jpg >be 2 hours after I get there >not one guy asked me out >get asked out by 4 lesbians Why did you guys lie? 24 Replies / 3 Images View Thread

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anon is a man without a plan | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:05:23 No.869679982 ► whats the plan with this girl tonight? >be me >18m >going to new years party tonight that my friend is hosting at his uncles mansion out in the countryside >sleeping there because it is far away from home >most people are leaving 2-3am with their partners or going home or whatever >will just be me and this girl sleeping in his poolhouse who ive breifly spoken to before becuase we have 10+ mutual friends >she texted me out of the blue last night and asked if i was sleeping there and if we would be on the same couch >tell her yeah i think so >she tells me its just us sleeping and then we start to make small talk over voice message >tells me she broke up with her bf a couple months ago >idea.jpg >tells me she wants to get insanely f------ drunk tomorrow >i tell her me too >tells me how bf asked her out but she rejected him >go to sleep >wake up >party is today >what do tonight /b/ros
O Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:05:23 No.869679982 ► whats the plan with this girl tonight? >be me >18m >going to new years party tonight that my friend is hosting at his uncles mansion out in the countryside >sleeping there because it is far away from home >most people are leaving 2-3am with their partners or going home or whatever >will just be me and this girl sleeping in his poolhouse who ive breifly spoken to before becuase we have 10+ mutual friends >she texted me out of the blue last night and asked if i was sleeping there and if we would be on the same couch >tell her yeah i think so >she tells me its just us sleeping and then we start to make small talk over voice message >tells me she broke up with her bf a couple months ago >idea.jpg >tells me she wants to get insanely f------ drunk tomorrow >i tell her me too >tells me how bf asked her out but she rejected him >go to sleep >wake up >party is today >what do tonight /b/ros

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Anon gets theorized | /r/Greentext


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Anon watches an horror movie | /r/Greentext

>be me >watching horror movie >jumpscare >i s--- myself but don't move >flash of light and then wardrobe falls down W-- just happened? WELL. FUG DD 33m (1/1 23:38) · 61660709 JPG 11KB · (480 × 360) bye anon have fun dying on the first day of 2021
>be me >watching horror movie >jumpscare >i s--- myself but don't move >flash of light and then wardrobe falls down W-- just happened? WELL. FUG DD 33m (1/1 23:38) · 61660709 JPG 11KB · (480 × 360) bye anon have fun dying on the first day of 2021

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Anon is a cook | /r/Greentext

File: 6BA2950A-2018-4596-9CEA-6(...).jpg (22 KB, 474x266) O Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)15:23:07 No.869684606 >be red >fight blue >fight till only a fraction is left >blonde man tell us we all black >this is where the real fight starts.mp3 >even fewer left >as a reward we become white >winner gets to work for blonde man
File: 6BA2950A-2018-4596-9CEA-6(...).jpg (22 KB, 474x266) O Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)15:23:07 No.869684606 >be red >fight blue >fight till only a fraction is left >blonde man tell us we all black >this is where the real fight starts.mp3 >even fewer left >as a reward we become white >winner gets to work for blonde man

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Door number 3 | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/29/20(Tue)15:45:23 No.61610706 >be me, college freshman >back home for winter break >if my parents see me on my phone they think I'm texting my "gf" >whenever we're eating dinner my 394 KB JPG parents always ask me about my "gf" >gets annoying because I will never have one >usually just laugh it off but my dad won't stop joking about it and acting like I'm scared to tell him I have a gf >sperg out and tell him to shut up >get mad and just leave >my mom asks me if l'm gay, goes on a rant about how it's okay >l explain to her l'm not >l'm such a loser my parents think I'm a f-- tfw pic rel will never be me
: Anonymous 12/29/20(Tue)15:45:23 No.61610706 >be me, college freshman >back home for winter break >if my parents see me on my phone they think I'm texting my "gf" >whenever we're eating dinner my 394 KB JPG parents always ask me about my "gf" >gets annoying because I will never have one >usually just laugh it off but my dad won't stop joking about it and acting like I'm scared to tell him I have a gf >sperg out and tell him to shut up >get mad and just leave >my mom asks me if l'm gay, goes on a rant about how it's okay >l explain to her l'm not >l'm such a loser my parents think I'm a f-- tfw pic rel will never be me

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Anon is in a relationship | /r/Greentext


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Anon hates women | /r/Greentext


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It's Anons 29th birthday | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Music that makes you feel. 12/31/21(Fri)06:31:22 No.66785362 >29th birthday today. >No friends. >No connections. >No college or highschool education. >No goals, no life aspirations. >No job. >No money. 74 KB JPG >No real beliefs or convictions. >No sense of purpose. >No willpower. >No real drive to fix any dysfunctions. >My only identity is that of being an absolute rotten and forgotten piece of humanity. Post Depressing music, sad music, melancholic music, post whatever songs make you feel something, it's going to be another year until I'm 30, then it's truly over and I can relax.
: Anonymous Music that makes you feel. 12/31/21(Fri)06:31:22 No.66785362 >29th birthday today. >No friends. >No connections. >No college or highschool education. >No goals, no life aspirations. >No job. >No money. 74 KB JPG >No real beliefs or convictions. >No sense of purpose. >No willpower. >No real drive to fix any dysfunctions. >My only identity is that of being an absolute rotten and forgotten piece of humanity. Post Depressing music, sad music, melancholic music, post whatever songs make you feel something, it's going to be another year until I'm 30, then it's truly over and I can relax.

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Anons brain crashes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)12:20:03 No.843623228 Anyone elses brain go into mashed potatoes mode at inopportune times? >at work >get call from boss >'anon how do i blah blah blah' 13 KB JPG >know answer >about to tell him >brain.exe has stopped responding >'anon? >ahhh >brain.exe encountered a runtime error >'anon you have been here for 3 years and you dont know how to blah blah blah? Wow okay' >boss hangs up Is this like autism or does one of my chromosomes disappear and reappear causing a spurt of downs?
: Anonymous 12/31/20(Thu)12:20:03 No.843623228 Anyone elses brain go into mashed potatoes mode at inopportune times? >at work >get call from boss >'anon how do i blah blah blah' 13 KB JPG >know answer >about to tell him >brain.exe has stopped responding >'anon? >ahhh >brain.exe encountered a runtime error >'anon you have been here for 3 years and you dont know how to blah blah blah? Wow okay' >boss hangs up Is this like autism or does one of my chromosomes disappear and reappear causing a spurt of downs?

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Anon got betrayed | /r/Greentext

>tfw my r9k 4 years old friend won't do the countdown with me, in a few hours and rather do it with his new discord friends yikes
>tfw my r9k 4 years old friend won't do the countdown with me, in a few hours and rather do it with his new discord friends yikes

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Anon is happy | /r/Greentext

| Anonymous 02/13/19(Wed)13:55:42 No.792533342 >be me >be loser who drives a delivery van all day >work is f------ boring as f--- >get new puppy >puppy is sad when I go to work >have idea 31 KB PNG >l will take puppy to work with me >Next day put puppy in van >Puppy sits shotgun all day, does not piss or poop in cab >Take puppy to park during lunch break >Puppy waits patiently while I make deliveries >Drive home >Realize work was fun with my little puppy buddy >Have never had this much enjoyment of work >Thank you puppy
| Anonymous 02/13/19(Wed)13:55:42 No.792533342 >be me >be loser who drives a delivery van all day >work is f------ boring as f--- >get new puppy >puppy is sad when I go to work >have idea 31 KB PNG >l will take puppy to work with me >Next day put puppy in van >Puppy sits shotgun all day, does not piss or poop in cab >Take puppy to park during lunch break >Puppy waits patiently while I make deliveries >Drive home >Realize work was fun with my little puppy buddy >Have never had this much enjoyment of work >Thank you puppy

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Anon falls for it every time | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Nofap, hook line and sinker 12/31/21(Fri)18:54:05 No.66794835 MayKem8603 kem8603-9m That guy cried and then blocked me for disrespecting his boyfriend I fell for the f------ meme again. Pic unrel. bluecomputer321 BlueComp. 9m what MayKem8603 @kem8603 >heard a lot about nofap and decided to try it >quit cold turkey >think to myself "man this is the easiest s--- ever" Repiying to BlueComputer3 and @ttnyb0dy I forgot I have to speak your language On my momma cuh dat n---- p---- ash boy det nidda block me cause L. 60 KB JPG >over the next few days start feeling more and more depressed, something that's literally never happened to me before >friends start disliking me and some even start ignoring me >feel even worse >start to put together the pieces in my head >fap >immediately feel much better and more confident >next day people start acting a lot friendlier with me >one of my closest friends messages me asking what was wrong with me and if I needed help Ruined my f------ christmas. F--- nofap and f--- all you retard Christians
: Anonymous Nofap, hook line and sinker 12/31/21(Fri)18:54:05 No.66794835 MayKem8603 kem8603-9m That guy cried and then blocked me for disrespecting his boyfriend I fell for the f------ meme again. Pic unrel. bluecomputer321 BlueComp. 9m what MayKem8603 @kem8603 >heard a lot about nofap and decided to try it >quit cold turkey >think to myself "man this is the easiest s--- ever" Repiying to BlueComputer3 and @ttnyb0dy I forgot I have to speak your language On my momma cuh dat n---- p---- ash boy det nidda block me cause L. 60 KB JPG >over the next few days start feeling more and more depressed, something that's literally never happened to me before >friends start disliking me and some even start ignoring me >feel even worse >start to put together the pieces in my head >fap >immediately feel much better and more confident >next day people start acting a lot friendlier with me >one of my closest friends messages me asking what was wrong with me and if I needed help Ruined my f------ christmas. F--- nofap and f--- all you retard Christians

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Demographic appeal | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)16:16:47 No.66793466 >straight male >constantly hit on by other men >get hit on by women like 1/10th of the time Am I attractive or not? 152 KB JPG
: Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)16:16:47 No.66793466 >straight male >constantly hit on by other men >get hit on by women like 1/10th of the time Am I attractive or not? 152 KB JPG

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Anon uses grenades | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/24/18(Sat)16:16:02 No.36925725 Why aren't grenades designed like these anymore? They have some definite advantages over what is commonly used 11 KB JPG today and they seem pretty practical in terms of ergonomics. >Doesn't roll >Can throw further >Can stick into ground if necessary >Can give you pleasure Can anyone explain to me why these are outdated?
Anonymous 02/24/18(Sat)16:16:02 No.36925725 Why aren't grenades designed like these anymore? They have some definite advantages over what is commonly used 11 KB JPG today and they seem pretty practical in terms of ergonomics. >Doesn't roll >Can throw further >Can stick into ground if necessary >Can give you pleasure Can anyone explain to me why these are outdated?

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The fatherland calls | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:30:16 No.66790919 >you are sitting in your room when a shining blue portal opens before you >a Nazi catboy steps out, he was sent personally by Hitler, he is from the year 1939 >he has been sent from the past to gather Information for the 67 KB JPG Fuhrer >you have 15 minutes before he will be sucked back into the portal >what do you do? : Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:32:42 No.66790937 >>66790919 (OP) # Jump into the portal and immediately look for catgirls. If I'm killed in the process that's okay.
: Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:30:16 No.66790919 >you are sitting in your room when a shining blue portal opens before you >a Nazi catboy steps out, he was sent personally by Hitler, he is from the year 1939 >he has been sent from the past to gather Information for the 67 KB JPG Fuhrer >you have 15 minutes before he will be sucked back into the portal >what do you do? : Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)12:32:42 No.66790937 >>66790919 (OP) # Jump into the portal and immediately look for catgirls. If I'm killed in the process that's okay.

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Anon meets a girl with anxiety | /r/Greentext

Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home : Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)19:18:46 No.869713178 >>869712709 (OP) # >Be dating girl >Tells me she has anxiety >Tell her it's ok I understand >We hang >Watching Netflix >Says she's feeling anxious >Tell her it's ok, ask if she wants to watch/ do something else >She says that if she could get more comfortable then it may help anxiety >She goes to bathroom >In there for a while >l crack the door alittle maybe to sneak a peak >I look in and I can see her pants on the floor >Ohfuck.joeg >I keep looking >See her panties >Sweetmotherofgod.jpeg >See her shirt >Huh? >Then her hair is on the floor >Whatthefuckishappening.gif >Then a full body skin suite of a white women in her mid 20s... >That's when I see it... >Bitch was a fucken velosoraptor the whole time!!! >Anxiety my ass!! >>869713281 # >>869713366 #
Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home : Anonymous 12/31/21(Fri)19:18:46 No.869713178 >>869712709 (OP) # >Be dating girl >Tells me she has anxiety >Tell her it's ok I understand >We hang >Watching Netflix >Says she's feeling anxious >Tell her it's ok, ask if she wants to watch/ do something else >She says that if she could get more comfortable then it may help anxiety >She goes to bathroom >In there for a while >l crack the door alittle maybe to sneak a peak >I look in and I can see her pants on the floor >Ohfuck.joeg >I keep looking >See her panties >Sweetmotherofgod.jpeg >See her shirt >Huh? >Then her hair is on the floor >Whatthefuckishappening.gif >Then a full body skin suite of a white women in her mid 20s... >That's when I see it... >Bitch was a fucken velosoraptor the whole time!!! >Anxiety my ass!! >>869713281 # >>869713366 #

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Wrestling with the facts | /r/Greentext


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Anon is a good uncle | /r/Greentext


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Anon is a genius | /r/Greentext


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