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Anon’s interesting classmate | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Why IPA 81 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat) 19:14:49 No.75461874 Why are autistic freaks so insufferable? Why cant you guys just be normal. >talking in class with another guy >he always has this tag along retard. Anytime you say anything he trys to turn it sexual or gross. Interupting the conversation every time. >try talking to him about anything he has nothing to say or add to the conversation. Trys to mimick what he thinks is a normal conversation but it comes off as a parody. >assume he is autistic and ignore him >we resume talking about the assignment and he cant handle not being the center of attention. >grabs a dead shark in a jar and starts showing it off, proudly telling a class room of 16 women and only three men (the autist, me, and the guy im speaking to) that sharks have two d---- >women are actively trying to save him from embarassment and resume the conversation, ignoring the fact he did anything at all. >know this f------ retard cant take social ques so i tell to just sit down and chill. >he screams at me. >starts sobbing >later found out he is there on sort of program. >is somehow failing the class which is just a refresher course. I am now entirely for neetbucks just so I never have to interact with this kind of man again. Why are there so many autistic zoomers? I don't mean in the ha ha im ironically autistic I mean genuine genetic rejects
Anonymous Why IPA 81 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat) 19:14:49 No.75461874 Why are autistic freaks so insufferable? Why cant you guys just be normal. >talking in class with another guy >he always has this tag along retard. Anytime you say anything he trys to turn it sexual or gross. Interupting the conversation every time. >try talking to him about anything he has nothing to say or add to the conversation. Trys to mimick what he thinks is a normal conversation but it comes off as a parody. >assume he is autistic and ignore him >we resume talking about the assignment and he cant handle not being the center of attention. >grabs a dead shark in a jar and starts showing it off, proudly telling a class room of 16 women and only three men (the autist, me, and the guy im speaking to) that sharks have two d---- >women are actively trying to save him from embarassment and resume the conversation, ignoring the fact he did anything at all. >know this f------ retard cant take social ques so i tell to just sit down and chill. >he screams at me. >starts sobbing >later found out he is there on sort of program. >is somehow failing the class which is just a refresher course. I am now entirely for neetbucks just so I never have to interact with this kind of man again. Why are there so many autistic zoomers? I don't mean in the ha ha im ironically autistic I mean genuine genetic rejects

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Anon hates girls | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/27/19(Wed)22:19:55 No.793770695 69 KB JPG >be me >ask a girl out >she says no >"im not interested in you like that, lets be friends" >sure ok, see you in class tm then receive a screenshot of her >immediately rejecting me >she sent it to me by accident why are women like this? pic unrelated
Anonymous 02/27/19(Wed)22:19:55 No.793770695 69 KB JPG >be me >ask a girl out >she says no >"im not interested in you like that, lets be friends" >sure ok, see you in class tm then receive a screenshot of her >immediately rejecting me >she sent it to me by accident why are women like this? pic unrelated

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Anon is tired of Wickslop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/19/23(Sun)08:38:42 No.192242636 983573.jpg 301 KB JPG Im so tired of wick slop. So f------ tedious to sit through. Couldnt even finish "part 4". >john wick spins around like an old ballerina for the 50th time and bad guy falls over >flashy lights and s--- >"uh yea.. its me again" or some gay s--- Keanu says half asleep
: Anonymous 11/19/23(Sun)08:38:42 No.192242636 983573.jpg 301 KB JPG Im so tired of wick slop. So f------ tedious to sit through. Couldnt even finish "part 4". >john wick spins around like an old ballerina for the 50th time and bad guy falls over >flashy lights and s--- >"uh yea.. its me again" or some gay s--- Keanu says half asleep

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Anon has a point | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/18/23(Sat)19:30:41 No.657881745 red-alert2-web.jpg 380 KB JPG >RTS requires planning, thinking and concentration to play >Zoomers don't have those skills because they spend all their free time watching dumb s--- on tiktok >RTS is now a dead genre thanks to zoomies being retarded
: Anonymous 11/18/23(Sat)19:30:41 No.657881745 red-alert2-web.jpg 380 KB JPG >RTS requires planning, thinking and concentration to play >Zoomers don't have those skills because they spend all their free time watching dumb s--- on tiktok >RTS is now a dead genre thanks to zoomies being retarded

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Anon did good | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 36 KB JPG 11/17/23(Fri)11:55:47 No.909434894 > be me > driving home from work > get pulled over for speeding > cop walks up to my window > "license and registration please" > I hand him my license and registration > he looks at my license and registration > "you know you were speeding, right?" > "yeah, sorry about that" > "it's okay, I'm just going to give you a warning this time" > "thanks officer" > cop walks back to his car > I start to drive away > I get a few miles down the road and I see the cop pull up behind me > he turns on his lights and sirens > I pull over > cop walks up to my window > "what's the matter officer?" > "I just wanted to give you this" > the cop hands me a jug of piss > "what's this?" > "it's piss" > "why are you giving me this?" > "because you were speeding" >"I don't understand" > "you see, when you speed, you're wasting gas, and when you waste gas, you're wasting oil, and when you waste oil, you're polluting the environment, and when you pollute the environment, you're killing the planet, and when you kill the planet, you're killing all of us, and I'm just trying to save the world" > I'm speechless > the cop gets back in his car and drives away > I sit there for a few minutes, trying to process what just happened > I finally start to drive away > I get a few miles down the road and I see a sign for a gun store > I pull over > I go inside the gun store > I buy a gun > I go back to my car >I drive to the police officer's house > I break into his house > I find his family > I shoot them all > I leave the house >I drive away > I'm never speeding again
: Anonymous 36 KB JPG 11/17/23(Fri)11:55:47 No.909434894 > be me > driving home from work > get pulled over for speeding > cop walks up to my window > "license and registration please" > I hand him my license and registration > he looks at my license and registration > "you know you were speeding, right?" > "yeah, sorry about that" > "it's okay, I'm just going to give you a warning this time" > "thanks officer" > cop walks back to his car > I start to drive away > I get a few miles down the road and I see the cop pull up behind me > he turns on his lights and sirens > I pull over > cop walks up to my window > "what's the matter officer?" > "I just wanted to give you this" > the cop hands me a jug of piss > "what's this?" > "it's piss" > "why are you giving me this?" > "because you were speeding" >"I don't understand" > "you see, when you speed, you're wasting gas, and when you waste gas, you're wasting oil, and when you waste oil, you're polluting the environment, and when you pollute the environment, you're killing the planet, and when you kill the planet, you're killing all of us, and I'm just trying to save the world" > I'm speechless > the cop gets back in his car and drives away > I sit there for a few minutes, trying to process what just happened > I finally start to drive away > I get a few miles down the road and I see a sign for a gun store > I pull over > I go inside the gun store > I buy a gun > I go back to my car >I drive to the police officer's house > I break into his house > I find his family > I shoot them all > I leave the house >I drive away > I'm never speeding again

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Anon and the floating city above China. | /r/Greentext

Floating city above China Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)17:21:58 No.16890443 >>16890455 >>16891717 >>16892390 >>168! >>16893270 How the f--- are you f------ not talking about this s---!? http://wwwww.mnn.com/earth-matters/climate-weather/stories/mysterious-floating-city-appears-sky-above-china http://wwwww.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/china/11940936/Mysterious-floating-city-appears-in-the-sky-over-China.html >An eerie ghost city recently appeared floating in the clouds above the Chinese cities of Jiangxi and Foshan, with thousands of accounts, reports The Telegraph. The supernatural-seeming event was even caught on film. Bizarre images show a shadowy sitting atop clouds, skyscrapers literally poking the sky. | Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)17:25:05 No.16890455 >>16891760 >>16890443 (OP) I played Bioshock: Infinite when it came out and I didn't really care for it, because it was so repetitive and visually homogeneous haha God you guys are funny Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:01:42 No.16890612>>16890626 >>16890667 >>16890892 >How the f--- are you f------ not talking about this s---!? because its a f------ you dumb c--- Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:02:18 No.16890617 Fata Morgana Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:04:54 No.16890626 File: 1445549137794.gif (1.55 MB, 468x278) >>16890612 >because it's a f------ What? Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:08:36 No.16890641 >>16892434 >>16890470 >They'll ignore your responses regarding the censorship of media going into and coming out of China. Because most Chinese know how to get around the great firewall of China. And they've got multiple youtube, more nico nico really, analogs that have absolutely none of this s--- being spammed Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:09:28 No.16890645 >>16890793 It's just their s----- knockoff of a city Don't worry. Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:16:50 No.16890667 ► >>16890612 >Whoal Dude that looks like a floating city in the sky! Nah that's just a f------. Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:24:27 No.16890700 ► It's a f------ □ Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:45:40 No.16890793 ► >>16890645 china always builds too many cities. No story here. top kek Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)19:04:37 No.16890892 ► >>16890612 >because its a f------ you dumb c--- 20 It's a bird! CITY IN THE SKY? THAT'S A F------ We have arrived at the f------ sir It's a plane? No you dumb c---! That's a f------! COMPU >How the f--- because its a f------ you dumb c--- made on imgu DISNEY PRES PRESENTS GHIBLI FILM STUDIO From Award Winning Director Hayao Miyazaki That's A F------ MARK ANON JAMES CLORIS PAQUIN VAN DER BEEK LEACHMAN HAMILL a f------ DIZ >>10890 out this s---!?
Floating city above China Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)17:21:58 No.16890443 >>16890455 >>16891717 >>16892390 >>168! >>16893270 How the f--- are you f------ not talking about this s---!? http://wwwww.mnn.com/earth-matters/climate-weather/stories/mysterious-floating-city-appears-sky-above-china http://wwwww.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/china/11940936/Mysterious-floating-city-appears-in-the-sky-over-China.html >An eerie ghost city recently appeared floating in the clouds above the Chinese cities of Jiangxi and Foshan, with thousands of accounts, reports The Telegraph. The supernatural-seeming event was even caught on film. Bizarre images show a shadowy sitting atop clouds, skyscrapers literally poking the sky. | Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)17:25:05 No.16890455 >>16891760 >>16890443 (OP) I played Bioshock: Infinite when it came out and I didn't really care for it, because it was so repetitive and visually homogeneous haha God you guys are funny Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:01:42 No.16890612>>16890626 >>16890667 >>16890892 >How the f--- are you f------ not talking about this s---!? because its a f------ you dumb c--- Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:02:18 No.16890617 Fata Morgana Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:04:54 No.16890626 File: 1445549137794.gif (1.55 MB, 468x278) >>16890612 >because it's a f------ What? Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:08:36 No.16890641 >>16892434 >>16890470 >They'll ignore your responses regarding the censorship of media going into and coming out of China. Because most Chinese know how to get around the great firewall of China. And they've got multiple youtube, more nico nico really, analogs that have absolutely none of this s--- being spammed Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:09:28 No.16890645 >>16890793 It's just their s----- knockoff of a city Don't worry. Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:16:50 No.16890667 ► >>16890612 >Whoal Dude that looks like a floating city in the sky! Nah that's just a f------. Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:24:27 No.16890700 ► It's a f------ □ Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)18:45:40 No.16890793 ► >>16890645 china always builds too many cities. No story here. top kek Anonymous 10/25/15(Sun)19:04:37 No.16890892 ► >>16890612 >because its a f------ you dumb c--- 20 It's a bird! CITY IN THE SKY? THAT'S A F------ We have arrived at the f------ sir It's a plane? No you dumb c---! That's a f------! COMPU >How the f--- because its a f------ you dumb c--- made on imgu DISNEY PRES PRESENTS GHIBLI FILM STUDIO From Award Winning Director Hayao Miyazaki That's A F------ MARK ANON JAMES CLORIS PAQUIN VAN DER BEEK LEACHMAN HAMILL a f------ DIZ >>10890 out this s---!?

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Harry Potter and the Prisoner Of Israel | /r/Greentext

1571555666176.png (497 KB, 570x529) ■ Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:43:42 No.125233905 ✓ >>125234068 >>125234084>>125234120 >>125234174 >>125234299 >>125234488 >>125234939 >>125235106 >>125236288 >>125236546 >>125236920 >>125237368 >>125237560 6 million HARRY 6 MILLION Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:45:06 No.125233936 1575566727768.gif (976 KB, 250x247) No, just uh cool it with the anti-Semitic remarks. E▪ Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:52:36 No.125234084>>125234408 >>125234603 >>125235214 >>125236288 >>125237086 >>125237359 >>125237427 >>125237508 >>125238094 >>125238162 >>125238289 >>125238303 >>125238392 >>125233905 (OP) >A POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EVERY JEW THAT DIED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and his friends go a------ at the Slytherin table >Dumbledore stares at the unchanged scoreboard, turns to the camera, and gives a sly wink >ZERO POINTS TO SLYTHERIN
1571555666176.png (497 KB, 570x529) ■ Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:43:42 No.125233905 ✓ >>125234068 >>125234084>>125234120 >>125234174 >>125234299 >>125234488 >>125234939 >>125235106 >>125236288 >>125236546 >>125236920 >>125237368 >>125237560 6 million HARRY 6 MILLION Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:45:06 No.125233936 1575566727768.gif (976 KB, 250x247) No, just uh cool it with the anti-Semitic remarks. E▪ Anonymous 12/06/19(Fri)10:52:36 No.125234084>>125234408 >>125234603 >>125235214 >>125236288 >>125237086 >>125237359 >>125237427 >>125237508 >>125238094 >>125238162 >>125238289 >>125238303 >>125238392 >>125233905 (OP) >A POINT TO SLYTHERIN FOR EVERY JEW THAT DIED IN THE HOLOCAUST >Draco and his friends go a------ at the Slytherin table >Dumbledore stares at the unchanged scoreboard, turns to the camera, and gives a sly wink >ZERO POINTS TO SLYTHERIN

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And don't forget the pickles | /r/Greentext

1:56 ← 44 90% □ : /b/ - All I want is... No.909386842 19 minutes ago a2e53b67d094d8f3c6fc335c3810cb18-viking-hairstyles-a mazon-warriors.jpg JPG 16.7 KiB 236x354 All I want is a nice, compassionate, at least semi-introspective, at least kinda nerdy, non-bigotted but not super duper overly woke woman who doesn't have an onlyfans but also isn't super judgy about that type of stuff and wants at least 1 kid...is that too much to ask: (looks wise like...6/10 at least. if shes all the other stuff she'll look like a 10/10 to me 3 replies No.909387155 6 minutes ago Ozg1tdhhnmu41.png PNG 132.2 KiB 524x706 >>909386842 (OP) I'll take a double sexy tradewife deluxe, on a wheat field, four-by-four nonwoke-style, extra t------ with a p---- and an ass, light booty grease, make it cry, spank it, and let it c--. 1 reply
1:56 ← 44 90% □ : /b/ - All I want is... No.909386842 19 minutes ago a2e53b67d094d8f3c6fc335c3810cb18-viking-hairstyles-a mazon-warriors.jpg JPG 16.7 KiB 236x354 All I want is a nice, compassionate, at least semi-introspective, at least kinda nerdy, non-bigotted but not super duper overly woke woman who doesn't have an onlyfans but also isn't super judgy about that type of stuff and wants at least 1 kid...is that too much to ask: (looks wise like...6/10 at least. if shes all the other stuff she'll look like a 10/10 to me 3 replies No.909387155 6 minutes ago Ozg1tdhhnmu41.png PNG 132.2 KiB 524x706 >>909386842 (OP) I'll take a double sexy tradewife deluxe, on a wheat field, four-by-four nonwoke-style, extra t------ with a p---- and an ass, light booty grease, make it cry, spank it, and let it c--. 1 reply

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The Balance of Reason | /r/Greentext

Anonymous justified or autistic moment? 25 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat)06:32:52 No.909502536 >be me >swipe right on girl on hinge >shes somewhat attractive but also not really, so i swipe right without any messages >she swipes back >says she's looking for a tour guide and wants me to pitch >i say "since when are tour guides the ones to do the pitching?" >she says something like "since ancient times, get along with the time my guy" >i unmatch my thoughts >she seemed like the type of girl who thinks of herself as hot s--- and was a turnoff >"my guy" hit the nail on the coffin thoughts? am i retarded and was thinking too much into it or was it just a casual funny bit she tried to do
Anonymous justified or autistic moment? 25 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat)06:32:52 No.909502536 >be me >swipe right on girl on hinge >shes somewhat attractive but also not really, so i swipe right without any messages >she swipes back >says she's looking for a tour guide and wants me to pitch >i say "since when are tour guides the ones to do the pitching?" >she says something like "since ancient times, get along with the time my guy" >i unmatch my thoughts >she seemed like the type of girl who thinks of herself as hot s--- and was a turnoff >"my guy" hit the nail on the coffin thoughts? am i retarded and was thinking too much into it or was it just a casual funny bit she tried to do

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Isolated Gratitude | /r/Greentext

ok heres something crazy for yall crazy for y(...) An ok heres something 618 KB PNG 11/18/23(Sat)09:11:36 No.75455830 >be me, lonely chubby f--- with no friends or lover. >coming back home from walking my dog, its the only time i get out >When i arrive home theres a bird with a broken wing in the garden, it's scared, can barely move and can't fly >mom says we're gonna have to euthanize it since if it cant fly it will get killed easily and it also might be infected >I have huge empathy for animals, almost a PETA friend so i refuse and decide to keep it safe and look after it even though its injured, could be infected and will probably die >Put it in a basket over night in my garden and feed it oats and water. Put a lid over it so no predators can get it >Next morning i check on it. It's still timid, can't fly and won't move ffs >reach over to get it's oats. When i look back at the basket. It isn't there >Oh f---, panic.jpg >Look in and around the basket for it, can't find it anywhere >Nothing grabbed it, theres no way it could have escaped on foot. There is no holes in the basket >It must have flew away, its wing must have healed. Mom said we were gonna euthanize it or let it go at some point but i managed to save it and nurture it back to health haha I am a severely lonely f--- khhv without a friend, friend group or gf. I have only been betrayed by people i know. But i still think life is beautiful and worth living. I love life anons.
ok heres something crazy for yall crazy for y(...) An ok heres something 618 KB PNG 11/18/23(Sat)09:11:36 No.75455830 >be me, lonely chubby f--- with no friends or lover. >coming back home from walking my dog, its the only time i get out >When i arrive home theres a bird with a broken wing in the garden, it's scared, can barely move and can't fly >mom says we're gonna have to euthanize it since if it cant fly it will get killed easily and it also might be infected >I have huge empathy for animals, almost a PETA friend so i refuse and decide to keep it safe and look after it even though its injured, could be infected and will probably die >Put it in a basket over night in my garden and feed it oats and water. Put a lid over it so no predators can get it >Next morning i check on it. It's still timid, can't fly and won't move ffs >reach over to get it's oats. When i look back at the basket. It isn't there >Oh f---, panic.jpg >Look in and around the basket for it, can't find it anywhere >Nothing grabbed it, theres no way it could have escaped on foot. There is no holes in the basket >It must have flew away, its wing must have healed. Mom said we were gonna euthanize it or let it go at some point but i managed to save it and nurture it back to health haha I am a severely lonely f--- khhv without a friend, friend group or gf. I have only been betrayed by people i know. But i still think life is beautiful and worth living. I love life anons.

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If only anon looked earlier... | /r/Greentext

Board /fit/- Fitness Anonymous HI an OVE ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/30/23(Mon)06:22:18 No.72659968 >benching at gym >there's a girl benching next to me >think I hear her laughing >figure she's on the phone talking to someone 612 KB WEBM >too autistic to look over >do another set >still hear her giggling >w-- is her problem >decide to see what she is doing >she had failed her rep, and the bar was on her neck >she wasn't giggling but gasping for air >run over and bull the Imao 65lbs off her neck >she thanks me and gets the f--- out
Board /fit/- Fitness Anonymous HI an OVE ▼ Settings Mobile Home 10/30/23(Mon)06:22:18 No.72659968 >benching at gym >there's a girl benching next to me >think I hear her laughing >figure she's on the phone talking to someone 612 KB WEBM >too autistic to look over >do another set >still hear her giggling >w-- is her problem >decide to see what she is doing >she had failed her rep, and the bar was on her neck >she wasn't giggling but gasping for air >run over and bull the Imao 65lbs off her neck >she thanks me and gets the f--- out

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Anon is American | /r/Greentext

12:52 QO Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Greentext thread 8 KB JPG LOVENSE [Advertise on 4chan] Noll 32%! Settings Mobile Home 11/18/23(Sat)12:52:10 No.75460268 ||| >Be two years ago >Grandpa died and left me his revolver >Very old revolver that used to belong to Great Grandpa >Two months go by >Never get a chance to shoot it at tthe range but still carry it >One day a------ neighbor starts an argument with me at my job >Fell bad and want to apologize to him >Get home and walk to his house >He's between our properties and calls me over >Can't see him because it's dark >"YOU WANNA F--- WITH ME? I WOULDN'T SUGGEST IT" >HE RACKS THE SLIDE ON A SHOTGUN >Reach for my revolver >Suddenly remember it's on a pile of laundry in my room >Immediately jump behind car and hide in cover until I'm in my home and can call the cops Three months later >Finally get a chance to take the revolver to the range >Can't fire it for some reason >Check the hammer >Grandpa never told me it was single-action >I would have died in a pool of my blood while squeezing the trigger on a single action revolver if I didn't have ADHD Post a Renly
12:52 QO Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous Greentext thread 8 KB JPG LOVENSE [Advertise on 4chan] Noll 32%! Settings Mobile Home 11/18/23(Sat)12:52:10 No.75460268 ||| >Be two years ago >Grandpa died and left me his revolver >Very old revolver that used to belong to Great Grandpa >Two months go by >Never get a chance to shoot it at tthe range but still carry it >One day a------ neighbor starts an argument with me at my job >Fell bad and want to apologize to him >Get home and walk to his house >He's between our properties and calls me over >Can't see him because it's dark >"YOU WANNA F--- WITH ME? I WOULDN'T SUGGEST IT" >HE RACKS THE SLIDE ON A SHOTGUN >Reach for my revolver >Suddenly remember it's on a pile of laundry in my room >Immediately jump behind car and hide in cover until I'm in my home and can call the cops Three months later >Finally get a chance to take the revolver to the range >Can't fire it for some reason >Check the hammer >Grandpa never told me it was single-action >I would have died in a pool of my blood while squeezing the trigger on a single action revolver if I didn't have ADHD Post a Renly

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Are they putting Uranium in these? | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 8:12 º mcdonalds.com/us/ + Ingredients in the Sausage Biscuit Wow 11/18/23(Sat)22:24:40 No.72839978 Nutrition Summary 460 Cal. Calories Nutritional Information 37g Total Carbs (13 % DV) Biscuit ||| 2 lll 50% 11g Protein 30g Total Fat (38 % DV) O Screenshot_20231118_081217_Chrome.jpg 472 KB JPG >get gym membership today >leaving gym >starving >want mcdonalds >think one single plain sausage biscuit is acceptable >get curious >look up the calories Bro is this why I've been fat as f--- my whole life? I would eat 2 of these and like 2 sausage burritos and that's just breakfast
: Anonymous 8:12 º mcdonalds.com/us/ + Ingredients in the Sausage Biscuit Wow 11/18/23(Sat)22:24:40 No.72839978 Nutrition Summary 460 Cal. Calories Nutritional Information 37g Total Carbs (13 % DV) Biscuit ||| 2 lll 50% 11g Protein 30g Total Fat (38 % DV) O Screenshot_20231118_081217_Chrome.jpg 472 KB JPG >get gym membership today >leaving gym >starving >want mcdonalds >think one single plain sausage biscuit is acceptable >get curious >look up the calories Bro is this why I've been fat as f--- my whole life? I would eat 2 of these and like 2 sausage burritos and that's just breakfast

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The Unintended Invitation | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Did I creep her out? 1.49 MB WEBM 11/18/23(Sat)08:09:27 No.75455203 Anonymous >work with a shy but very cute girl >she gives awkward "gtfo creep" puritan vibes >one day her car breaks down so I offer her a ride >drop her at her place and make a stalker joke about it >she looks awkward as heck so I brush it off as a joke >one month passes and we work again together yesterday >don't say a word to each other because it felt really weird >shift is coming to an end and were alone warping things up >she turns and asks "so what happened to stalking?, I was kinda waiting you'd reach out" 11/18/23(Sat)08:11:02 No.75455212 >>75455203 Your height and face rating? You just have to be hot bro.
Anonymous Did I creep her out? 1.49 MB WEBM 11/18/23(Sat)08:09:27 No.75455203 Anonymous >work with a shy but very cute girl >she gives awkward "gtfo creep" puritan vibes >one day her car breaks down so I offer her a ride >drop her at her place and make a stalker joke about it >she looks awkward as heck so I brush it off as a joke >one month passes and we work again together yesterday >don't say a word to each other because it felt really weird >shift is coming to an end and were alone warping things up >she turns and asks "so what happened to stalking?, I was kinda waiting you'd reach out" 11/18/23(Sat)08:11:02 No.75455212 >>75455203 Your height and face rating? You just have to be hot bro.

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anon works at the pool | /r/Greentext

315 KB JPG >be me >work as lifeguard for indoor pool >sitting in my guard chair, slow day today >kid with downs walks in >not wearing any swimming clothes, just casual wear >he waddles up to me >"how's your day been, anon?" >i tell him i've been fine >"how much do you bench?" >i tell him i can only do a single rep of 185 >"wow, you're so strong" >he walks out of the pool, never to be seen again
315 KB JPG >be me >work as lifeguard for indoor pool >sitting in my guard chair, slow day today >kid with downs walks in >not wearing any swimming clothes, just casual wear >he waddles up to me >"how's your day been, anon?" >i tell him i've been fine >"how much do you bench?" >i tell him i can only do a single rep of 185 >"wow, you're so strong" >he walks out of the pool, never to be seen again

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Finnanon is a multiculturalist | /r/Greentext

O Anonymous (ID: 7uOldg9k) File: 1692758367635702.png (354 KB, 3753x1990) 11/19/23(Sun)00:02:54 No.449123549 ► Anonymous (ID: 1PziAnMQ) 08/10/23(Thu)12:54:30 No.437495975 >>437498709 >>437502769 File: img-1.png (34 KB, 647x778) >>437496410 >>437482411 (OP) DUDE i just LOVE the stink and pollution of the Indian slum, it's so RANCID and makes me feel like i'm in one of my favourite INDIAN RESTAURANTS. you should totally come on down to my designated s------- street, it's got EXPLODING DIARRHEA and everything, we can cook up a nice rotten curry or three and get crazy watching Ranjeet r--- his grandfather! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the Ganges River- listen here, right, it's a RIVER where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go BATHING. BUT!!!! it's also an DUMPSTER like we were animals, so we can bathe in a LANDFILL, with Ransheets bloating corpse with us. speaking of which Shansheet and i have finally decided to praise the cows- literally -we're both getting s--- and p----- on by cows tomorrow at the Temple, that way we can save money spent on bathing and get a SNACK TOO. i'm f----- JACKED man, i'm gonna SLAM this Tikka Masala and REDEEM A Google play card!!!
O Anonymous (ID: 7uOldg9k) File: 1692758367635702.png (354 KB, 3753x1990) 11/19/23(Sun)00:02:54 No.449123549 ► Anonymous (ID: 1PziAnMQ) 08/10/23(Thu)12:54:30 No.437495975 >>437498709 >>437502769 File: img-1.png (34 KB, 647x778) >>437496410 >>437482411 (OP) DUDE i just LOVE the stink and pollution of the Indian slum, it's so RANCID and makes me feel like i'm in one of my favourite INDIAN RESTAURANTS. you should totally come on down to my designated s------- street, it's got EXPLODING DIARRHEA and everything, we can cook up a nice rotten curry or three and get crazy watching Ranjeet r--- his grandfather! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the Ganges River- listen here, right, it's a RIVER where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go BATHING. BUT!!!! it's also an DUMPSTER like we were animals, so we can bathe in a LANDFILL, with Ransheets bloating corpse with us. speaking of which Shansheet and i have finally decided to praise the cows- literally -we're both getting s--- and p----- on by cows tomorrow at the Temple, that way we can save money spent on bathing and get a SNACK TOO. i'm f----- JACKED man, i'm gonna SLAM this Tikka Masala and REDEEM A Google play card!!!

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European Eccentricities | /r/Greentext

11/18/23(Sat)07:15:21 No.75454914 >Meet an arab guy online >He's kinda rich and from qatar >his gf is a 15 years old french girl >she's a neet and dosen't go outside cuz her place in paris is too dangerous >She threatens to commit suicide if the Arab guy leaves her >they plan to migrate to Canada Together when she reach 18 the f--- is wrong with euros ? Anonymous 229 KB JPG
11/18/23(Sat)07:15:21 No.75454914 >Meet an arab guy online >He's kinda rich and from qatar >his gf is a 15 years old french girl >she's a neet and dosen't go outside cuz her place in paris is too dangerous >She threatens to commit suicide if the Arab guy leaves her >they plan to migrate to Canada Together when she reach 18 the f--- is wrong with euros ? Anonymous 229 KB JPG

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Anon forgets his tissue | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 893 KB PNG 09/13/21(Mon)20:12:52 No.65364593 >be me >j------- in my room >it's late so i don't dispose of the tissue >idea.jpeg >leave tissue under my bed, to throw it away the next day >wake up >leave house >return after school >tissue is gone they know now, i've reached a new stage of retardness.
Anonymous 893 KB PNG 09/13/21(Mon)20:12:52 No.65364593 >be me >j------- in my room >it's late so i don't dispose of the tissue >idea.jpeg >leave tissue under my bed, to throw it away the next day >wake up >leave house >return after school >tissue is gone they know now, i've reached a new stage of retardness.

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Plateful of Z's | /r/Greentext

Anonymous OO 100 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat)09:28:50 No.75456039 Anonymous >be me >autist girl who has a mental age of like 8 >gf gets pizza hut for us last night >wake up 2 hours before her >sneak into kitchen >eat half the leftovers >snuggle up with plushies on living room floor >pass out into food coma 11/18/23(Sat)09:30:05 No.75456053 >>75456039 Do you touch boobs with your boobs
Anonymous OO 100 KB JPG 11/18/23(Sat)09:28:50 No.75456039 Anonymous >be me >autist girl who has a mental age of like 8 >gf gets pizza hut for us last night >wake up 2 hours before her >sneak into kitchen >eat half the leftovers >snuggle up with plushies on living room floor >pass out into food coma 11/18/23(Sat)09:30:05 No.75456053 >>75456039 Do you touch boobs with your boobs

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Anon gets approached by a girl | /r/Greentext

Coco_010.jpg 17 KB JPG >New coworker >Two weeks after she started, have literally never talked to her >She walks up to me out of nowhere >"Why do you look so mad all the time?" Why the f--- do people feel the need to say s--- like this?
Coco_010.jpg 17 KB JPG >New coworker >Two weeks after she started, have literally never talked to her >She walks up to me out of nowhere >"Why do you look so mad all the time?" Why the f--- do people feel the need to say s--- like this?

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