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Anon the hobgoblin | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/06/22(Thu)18:57:23 No.870097154 >Some friends I played games with used to call me goblin due to my nose and small stature >didn't see them for about 3 years >started to workout since then >got really buff >saw them again yesterday >now they call me hobgoblin 22 KB JPG View Thread
: Anonymous 01/06/22(Thu)18:57:23 No.870097154 >Some friends I played games with used to call me goblin due to my nose and small stature >didn't see them for about 3 years >started to workout since then >got really buff >saw them again yesterday >now they call me hobgoblin 22 KB JPG View Thread

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Anon has a Death Note | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)21:31:23 No.873582477 >junior year of highschool >become friends with girl in class >have crush on her best friend >tell her >she hypes me up >tells me I should tell her >l take my time and gather the 33 KB JPG courage >tell her I like her >she laughs and runs away from me >tells everyone in school and everyone is making fun of me for it >she laughs at me in the hallway anytime I walk by her >her guy friends threaten to kick my ass if I come near her >here's the wild s--- >same day she falls down the school bleachers doing some b------- training for track >ends up hitting her head or breaking her neck, maybe both I don't remember >actually f------ dies >l cannot make this s--- up >nobody gave me s--- for the rest of highschool
: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)21:31:23 No.873582477 >junior year of highschool >become friends with girl in class >have crush on her best friend >tell her >she hypes me up >tells me I should tell her >l take my time and gather the 33 KB JPG courage >tell her I like her >she laughs and runs away from me >tells everyone in school and everyone is making fun of me for it >she laughs at me in the hallway anytime I walk by her >her guy friends threaten to kick my ass if I come near her >here's the wild s--- >same day she falls down the school bleachers doing some b------- training for track >ends up hitting her head or breaking her neck, maybe both I don't remember >actually f------ dies >l cannot make this s--- up >nobody gave me s--- for the rest of highschool

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Anon sits next to a fatty | /r/Greentext

No.28149171 >28149207 >>28150315 >>28150866 >>28151093 >>28151171 >>28152714 >>28153011 >28154671 >>28155672 >>28155754 >>28155972 No FPS thread? Let's change that. >Have middle seat on a flight >Fatty next to window >Nice albeit overweight granny has the aisle seat >Granny was nice, talking about her grandkids and such, so I can deal with her >Hamplanet, however, keeps fidgeting; the trees he calls legs keep touching mine >Kicks his knees out and grunts like the beast he is >I look him dead in the eye and say "What the hell, man?" >"I hate it when people touch me. Give me space!" >Say that my legs are perfectly in line with my seat and the only one taking up space is him >Oh dear lord, I've uttered the secret phrase that sets off this Manchurian candidate >"Are you seriously calling me fat?! How rude!" >Normally I'd laugh it off, but I have to sit next to him for another 3 hours >"No I didn't call you fat, but you know what? You are fat, so fat that you think you're entitled to the leg space that I paid for." >Kick my legs out, exactly like he did >Curse words were flung, flight attendants came >Granny resolves the situation by switching seats with me >Fatass is still p----- >Flight attendant tells him to buy a first class seat next time >He threatens that there will be hell to pay >Flight attendant smirks and walks off >Guy notices that granny's legs are touching his, gets even madder >"Oh don't mind me, sweety. I'm fat too, we'll get through this. You just sit there and be quiet, our legs are going to be touching and there's nothing we can do about it." >l chuckle, he's angry, granny gives me a wink
No.28149171 >28149207 >>28150315 >>28150866 >>28151093 >>28151171 >>28152714 >>28153011 >28154671 >>28155672 >>28155754 >>28155972 No FPS thread? Let's change that. >Have middle seat on a flight >Fatty next to window >Nice albeit overweight granny has the aisle seat >Granny was nice, talking about her grandkids and such, so I can deal with her >Hamplanet, however, keeps fidgeting; the trees he calls legs keep touching mine >Kicks his knees out and grunts like the beast he is >I look him dead in the eye and say "What the hell, man?" >"I hate it when people touch me. Give me space!" >Say that my legs are perfectly in line with my seat and the only one taking up space is him >Oh dear lord, I've uttered the secret phrase that sets off this Manchurian candidate >"Are you seriously calling me fat?! How rude!" >Normally I'd laugh it off, but I have to sit next to him for another 3 hours >"No I didn't call you fat, but you know what? You are fat, so fat that you think you're entitled to the leg space that I paid for." >Kick my legs out, exactly like he did >Curse words were flung, flight attendants came >Granny resolves the situation by switching seats with me >Fatass is still p----- >Flight attendant tells him to buy a first class seat next time >He threatens that there will be hell to pay >Flight attendant smirks and walks off >Guy notices that granny's legs are touching his, gets even madder >"Oh don't mind me, sweety. I'm fat too, we'll get through this. You just sit there and be quiet, our legs are going to be touching and there's nothing we can do about it." >l chuckle, he's angry, granny gives me a wink

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A cut above | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)18:33:42 No.67608601 >get a haircut and shave >instantly go from 2/10 to 4/10 Bros I think I might make it 142 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)18:33:42 No.67608601 >get a haircut and shave >instantly go from 2/10 to 4/10 Bros I think I might make it 142 KB JPG

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Anon explains how Hermione was actually black | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)09:56:23 No.160408196 >>160407906 (OP) # Maybe if any of you actually read the books, you would know Hermoine was written as a black 241 KB JPG girl from the start. Deathly Hallows page 234 paragraph 3 and I quote. >"Ron! Voldemort is getting away on his broomstick!". >"Oh No Harry! How are we going to catch him" Ron replied. >Things looked dire indeed but just then Hermoine hollered at Harry and Ron from down the street. %31 >"Yo crackers, I gots us some bikes now lets roll on that jive ass noseless m-----------!" >"Hermoine, where did you get these bicycles?" inquired Harry. >"Shieeeetttt.." replied Hermoine.
: Anonymous 12/10/21(Fri)09:56:23 No.160408196 >>160407906 (OP) # Maybe if any of you actually read the books, you would know Hermoine was written as a black 241 KB JPG girl from the start. Deathly Hallows page 234 paragraph 3 and I quote. >"Ron! Voldemort is getting away on his broomstick!". >"Oh No Harry! How are we going to catch him" Ron replied. >Things looked dire indeed but just then Hermoine hollered at Harry and Ron from down the street. %31 >"Yo crackers, I gots us some bikes now lets roll on that jive ass noseless m-----------!" >"Hermoine, where did you get these bicycles?" inquired Harry. >"Shieeeetttt.." replied Hermoine.

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Anon Put(it)in | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/27/22(Sun)18:52:33 No.873504634 >Under Bush: Georgia >Under Obama: Crimea >Under Trump: >Under Biden: Ukraine Why did Putin fear Trump though? 150 KB JPG 44 Replies / 7 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/22(Sun)19:23:49 No.873506074 REPUBLICANS >>873504634 (OP) # You don't start a fight with a guy who's got your d--- in his mouth. ARE NOT AMERICANS 59 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/27/22(Sun)18:52:33 No.873504634 >Under Bush: Georgia >Under Obama: Crimea >Under Trump: >Under Biden: Ukraine Why did Putin fear Trump though? 150 KB JPG 44 Replies / 7 Images View Thread : Anonymous 02/27/22(Sun)19:23:49 No.873506074 REPUBLICANS >>873504634 (OP) # You don't start a fight with a guy who's got your d--- in his mouth. ARE NOT AMERICANS 59 KB JPG

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Anon gives a hug | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)21:50:41 No.64020304 >give her a hug >hug for a very long time >worry I'm hugging for too long >"do you want me to let go?" >she squeezes me tighter :)) 11 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)22:12:38 No.64020468 >>64020304 (OP) # that makes me feel very lonely fren but also very happy for you, wishing the best for you two
: Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)21:50:41 No.64020304 >give her a hug >hug for a very long time >worry I'm hugging for too long >"do you want me to let go?" >she squeezes me tighter :)) 11 KB PNG 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 06/05/21(Sat)22:12:38 No.64020468 >>64020304 (OP) # that makes me feel very lonely fren but also very happy for you, wishing the best for you two

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Anon follows the meme | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)22:47:37 No.67606851 >took the meme advice for the lulz >started lifting 5x/week >drinking more water >eating mostly veggies and Lber Cats Uber Cats meat/fish >taking supplements (multivitamin + fish oil) 868 KB JPG >sleeping 8-9 hours a night on a regular schedule >reading instead of gaming in my free time >improved my hygiene >completely unplugged from all social media and news outlets I've lost weight, my skin cleared up, and I feel like a completely different person. I thought this was supposed to be b-------
: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)22:47:37 No.67606851 >took the meme advice for the lulz >started lifting 5x/week >drinking more water >eating mostly veggies and Lber Cats Uber Cats meat/fish >taking supplements (multivitamin + fish oil) 868 KB JPG >sleeping 8-9 hours a night on a regular schedule >reading instead of gaming in my free time >improved my hygiene >completely unplugged from all social media and news outlets I've lost weight, my skin cleared up, and I feel like a completely different person. I thought this was supposed to be b-------

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Anon's life is a comedy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)20:48:07 No.873552449 pain.jpg 84 KB JPG >be me >one chance at life >only attracted to femboys >born in the Middle East to a broke family I am God's punching bag
: Anonymous 02/28/22(Mon)20:48:07 No.873552449 pain.jpg 84 KB JPG >be me >one chance at life >only attracted to femboys >born in the Middle East to a broke family I am God's punching bag

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Anon's Writing Workshop Partner | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 2/06/22(Sun)23:57:14 No.16965346 683A8509-560F-4318-84A2-50F761857668.jpg 68 KB JPG >Writing workshop assignment to try out hand at romance >my paired critiquing partner for that day in class is a woman >after she reads over my work, the first thing she says to me is "You're a virgin, aren't you?"
: Anonymous 2/06/22(Sun)23:57:14 No.16965346 683A8509-560F-4318-84A2-50F761857668.jpg 68 KB JPG >Writing workshop assignment to try out hand at romance >my paired critiquing partner for that day in class is a woman >after she reads over my work, the first thing she says to me is "You're a virgin, aren't you?"

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Anon appreciates the present | /r/Greentext


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Russian Anon is feeling the pain | /r/Greentext


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Anon mugs a child | /r/Greentext


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Anon is a hero | /r/Greentext


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Anon hailed from Snake Island | /r/Greentext


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Germany vs Israel 2 Electric Boogaloo | /r/Greentext

No.87571996 11 hours ago Germany >Jurgen WHY THE F--- CANT YOU JUST WRITE JUERGEN ITS F------ JUERGEN IF YOU DONT HAVE AN UMLAUT HIS NAME IS NOT JURGEN 25 replies No.8757215111 hours ago Israel >>87571996 how about killing yourself you disgusting germ*n 24 replies No.87572244 11 hours ago Germany >>87572151 how about you leave through the chimney like your grandpa 32 replies G..
No.87571996 11 hours ago Germany >Jurgen WHY THE F--- CANT YOU JUST WRITE JUERGEN ITS F------ JUERGEN IF YOU DONT HAVE AN UMLAUT HIS NAME IS NOT JURGEN 25 replies No.8757215111 hours ago Israel >>87571996 how about killing yourself you disgusting germ*n 24 replies No.87572244 11 hours ago Germany >>87572151 how about you leave through the chimney like your grandpa 32 replies G..

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