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Anon Makes a Left Turn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)16:36:18 No.64785615 >"The Olympics, that's pretty f------ gay." >Goes back to watching NASCAR 56 KB PNG
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)16:36:18 No.64785615 >"The Olympics, that's pretty f------ gay." >Goes back to watching NASCAR 56 KB PNG

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Anon Has a Decision to Make | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/10/21(Mon)00:04:09 No.63597231 >Straight >No friends >Never had a gf >Go to college >New guy in class comes in >He's openly gay and kind to everyone, including me. Literally an 1.82 MB PNG angel who could do noting wrong >We become good friends over time >A few months roll by >He confesses to me >Says he always felt like this since he first met I don't know what to do anons, I don't want to break his heart and having a lover would be nice, but I don't know how people will view me. I don't want to be made fun of : Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)00:06:04 No.63597256 >>63597231 (OP) # Go get topped OP 13 KB PNG
: Anonymous 05/10/21(Mon)00:04:09 No.63597231 >Straight >No friends >Never had a gf >Go to college >New guy in class comes in >He's openly gay and kind to everyone, including me. Literally an 1.82 MB PNG angel who could do noting wrong >We become good friends over time >A few months roll by >He confesses to me >Says he always felt like this since he first met I don't know what to do anons, I don't want to break his heart and having a lover would be nice, but I don't know how people will view me. I don't want to be made fun of : Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)00:06:04 No.63597256 >>63597231 (OP) # Go get topped OP 13 KB PNG

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Anon goes to the dentist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)01:32:46 No.860068475 >be me >go to dentist appointment >dentist is a woman >puts her fingers in my mouth >fingers >in 53 KB PNG >my >mouth >women finger themselves >using their fingers Later virgins
: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)01:32:46 No.860068475 >be me >go to dentist appointment >dentist is a woman >puts her fingers in my mouth >fingers >in 53 KB PNG >my >mouth >women finger themselves >using their fingers Later virgins

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Anon visit balkans | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/05/19(Tue)12:04:17 No.55203020 >be me >migrate from canada to some ex yugoslavia country cause my dad was from there >think that i'll be chad from abroad and sufocate in p--- 71 KB JPG no >balkan state of mind is natural trolling in its purest forn >be balkan trolled for decsdes >develope anxiety and depression >they have thick skin and dont react to trolling >start to become balkan chad go back to gay snowflake canada and drown in p--- thank you balkan
Anonymous 11/05/19(Tue)12:04:17 No.55203020 >be me >migrate from canada to some ex yugoslavia country cause my dad was from there >think that i'll be chad from abroad and sufocate in p--- 71 KB JPG no >balkan state of mind is natural trolling in its purest forn >be balkan trolled for decsdes >develope anxiety and depression >they have thick skin and dont react to trolling >start to become balkan chad go back to gay snowflake canada and drown in p--- thank you balkan

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Raise your glasses | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)09:06:29 No.64779361 >be me >4 am >finish watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World in a call >friend says he needs to piss >"maybe i should piss in a glass" >silence 98 KB PNG >everyone there dares him to do it >2 minutes >sends image of a glass filled with his own piss, with obvious piss stains on the desk around it >mfw
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)09:06:29 No.64779361 >be me >4 am >finish watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World in a call >friend says he needs to piss >"maybe i should piss in a glass" >silence 98 KB PNG >everyone there dares him to do it >2 minutes >sends image of a glass filled with his own piss, with obvious piss stains on the desk around it >mfw

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Anon prefers bing | /r/Greentext

1500590969099.jpg (78 KB, 346x450) google yandex >make post criticizing google >next captcha shows street near my house
1500590969099.jpg (78 KB, 346x450) google yandex >make post criticizing google >next captcha shows street near my house

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Anon Remembers | /r/Greentext

File: mfw.jpg (9 KB, 360x287) Anonymous 02/28/21(Sun)12:35:44 No.848511858 > googling Alzheimer's symptoms > all the links are purple. >mfw
File: mfw.jpg (9 KB, 360x287) Anonymous 02/28/21(Sun)12:35:44 No.848511858 > googling Alzheimer's symptoms > all the links are purple. >mfw

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Anon hasn’t discovers yet that his gf is imaginary | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)22:51:42 No.860059814 >be me >had birthday >last piece of cake is left >gf asks if she can have it >"only for a kiss" >"no thanks" 275 KB JPG >one hour later, came into kitchen >last piece is still untouched She's slowly losing interest in me and there's nothing I can do
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)22:51:42 No.860059814 >be me >had birthday >last piece of cake is left >gf asks if she can have it >"only for a kiss" >"no thanks" 275 KB JPG >one hour later, came into kitchen >last piece is still untouched She's slowly losing interest in me and there's nothing I can do

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Anon doesn't fall for it | /r/Greentext

File: chad.jpg (65 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:46:40 No.860066000 [Reply] >read all 318 pages of the terms and conditions >clicks disagree
File: chad.jpg (65 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:46:40 No.860066000 [Reply] >read all 318 pages of the terms and conditions >clicks disagree

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Anon likes blonde girls | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:40:38 No.64191077 >theres probably a cute blonde girl pooping somewhere right now 50 KB PNG 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:43:46 No.64191120 >>64191077 (OP) I wonder if her poop smells like candy and rainbows 86 KB JPG
: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:40:38 No.64191077 >theres probably a cute blonde girl pooping somewhere right now 50 KB PNG 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:43:46 No.64191120 >>64191077 (OP) I wonder if her poop smells like candy and rainbows 86 KB JPG

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When in trouble, stab yourself! | /r/Greentext

Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me 138 KB PNG >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided
Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me 138 KB PNG >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided

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Anon... uhhhhh... I can’t really think of a title | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: MTÉSWNOT ) Will the GirlsDoPorn case chan...) 11/07/19(Thu)20:40:46 No.232474502 file not found.png 793 KB PNG We've had some good discussions on this. To recap the situation: >Girl turns 18, strapped for cash to pay for tuition, looks for modeling ads on craigslist. >Finds a gig offering $5,000 for tasteful bikini shoot >They offer to fly girl to San Diego, pay for a 5-star suite, etc. >Once there on set, girl is told she will do hardcore p--- and take a facial >Girl tries to back out and is screamed at, insulted, told she is worthless and will have to reimburse the company for the tickets and suite >ls further told the video will be sold only on DVD to wealthy Australians, no one back home will know >2 months later, video is released on the internet complete with girl's real name and hometown, the producers purposefully made sure her friends/family found out >Girls life is ruined, quits school, often turns to booze This happened to over 500 girls. Now the FBI has arrested the employees and they are facing life in prison for sex trafficking.
: Anonymous (ID: MTÉSWNOT ) Will the GirlsDoPorn case chan...) 11/07/19(Thu)20:40:46 No.232474502 file not found.png 793 KB PNG We've had some good discussions on this. To recap the situation: >Girl turns 18, strapped for cash to pay for tuition, looks for modeling ads on craigslist. >Finds a gig offering $5,000 for tasteful bikini shoot >They offer to fly girl to San Diego, pay for a 5-star suite, etc. >Once there on set, girl is told she will do hardcore p--- and take a facial >Girl tries to back out and is screamed at, insulted, told she is worthless and will have to reimburse the company for the tickets and suite >ls further told the video will be sold only on DVD to wealthy Australians, no one back home will know >2 months later, video is released on the internet complete with girl's real name and hometown, the producers purposefully made sure her friends/family found out >Girls life is ruined, quits school, often turns to booze This happened to over 500 girls. Now the FBI has arrested the employees and they are facing life in prison for sex trafficking.

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Anon has shitty parents | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(..) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe is Ast ver futM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.
: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(..) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe is Ast ver futM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.

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Above his weight class | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)15:51:50 No.64783154 >Leaving petsmart today after grabbing some food for my dog >See some 5'4" dude hand in hand with a goth looking girl who was at least 10 inches taller than him Congrats to that guy We're all gonna make it 253 KB PNG
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)15:51:50 No.64783154 >Leaving petsmart today after grabbing some food for my dog >See some 5'4" dude hand in hand with a goth looking girl who was at least 10 inches taller than him Congrats to that guy We're all gonna make it 253 KB PNG

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Anon playing battleships | /r/Greentext

BURG : Anonymous f--- tsa 07/31/21(Sat)15:17:47 No.64779041 >be me >8 or so years go, around 15 at the time >summer break, going to greece for the holidays with my family >arrived at the airport 4 hours too early because parent are paranoid >whatever, just sitting and waiting, chatting with my 1.4 MB PNG bro >get bored >decide to play battleships >pull put some squared paper, draw all the s--- >itistime.bin >the game goes alright, no one has a decisive advantage yet >next move >C4 >immediately after my brother utters the name of this square i hear it >rumbleinthejungle.waw >out of every conceivable entrance, they come >all black, with riot shields in hand >were surrounded >suddenly a gap opens up in their defensive formation >its obama >he comes to us >kneels >and whispers into my ear >"its a matter of national security" >tears of joy roll down my face, as it gets shredded into pieces by glorious m4s >god i love this country pick unrelated
BURG : Anonymous f--- tsa 07/31/21(Sat)15:17:47 No.64779041 >be me >8 or so years go, around 15 at the time >summer break, going to greece for the holidays with my family >arrived at the airport 4 hours too early because parent are paranoid >whatever, just sitting and waiting, chatting with my 1.4 MB PNG bro >get bored >decide to play battleships >pull put some squared paper, draw all the s--- >itistime.bin >the game goes alright, no one has a decisive advantage yet >next move >C4 >immediately after my brother utters the name of this square i hear it >rumbleinthejungle.waw >out of every conceivable entrance, they come >all black, with riot shields in hand >were surrounded >suddenly a gap opens up in their defensive formation >its obama >he comes to us >kneels >and whispers into my ear >"its a matter of national security" >tears of joy roll down my face, as it gets shredded into pieces by glorious m4s >god i love this country pick unrelated

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anon loves his girlfriend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)12:12:47 No.860054704 >be me >have gf >slap her ass all the time >do it whenever shes walking up the stairs, doing the dishes, or even when she's laying with me >she f------ hates it lol 26 KB JPG >constantly tells me to stop and that she doesn't want me to do it anymore >okayfine.png >I stop doing it for ONE day and she starts asking what's wrong, wants to have sex with me constantly and MAKES me slap her ass I love my girlfriend bro I think she's the one
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)12:12:47 No.860054704 >be me >have gf >slap her ass all the time >do it whenever shes walking up the stairs, doing the dishes, or even when she's laying with me >she f------ hates it lol 26 KB JPG >constantly tells me to stop and that she doesn't want me to do it anymore >okayfine.png >I stop doing it for ONE day and she starts asking what's wrong, wants to have sex with me constantly and MAKES me slap her ass I love my girlfriend bro I think she's the one

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Anon is American | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/04/21(Fri)07:19:14 No.856048371 >be american >get genitally mutilated >your sister births a mulatto >your mum overdoses on sleeping pills >your dad gets a heart attack from eating too much McWendy'sln-N- 1.64 MB JPG OutBellHut >get shot 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 06/04/21(Fri)07:19:14 No.856048371 >be american >get genitally mutilated >your sister births a mulatto >your mum overdoses on sleeping pills >your dad gets a heart attack from eating too much McWendy'sln-N- 1.64 MB JPG OutBellHut >get shot 4 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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There's always a bigger fish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:14:46 No.64775604 >403 IQ >Tested my skull measurement again and 403 IQ popped up for the third time, so that's the real value tya ty ntn 41 >Stood away from the camera at a distance and centered my head with the lens so there's no 184 KB JPG distortion I think the human maximum IQ is 423-460. Anything higher than that and there's no reproduction. 9 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:33:19 No.64775749 >>64775761 # >>64775861 # : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:33:48 No.64775753 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:34:49 No.64775761 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:50:36 No.64775861 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)01:09:10 No.64776032 1626613300544.png 110 KВ PNG >>64775604 (OP) # I just got a 414, triple checked. sorry OP picrel. its you
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:14:46 No.64775604 >403 IQ >Tested my skull measurement again and 403 IQ popped up for the third time, so that's the real value tya ty ntn 41 >Stood away from the camera at a distance and centered my head with the lens so there's no 184 KB JPG distortion I think the human maximum IQ is 423-460. Anything higher than that and there's no reproduction. 9 Replies / 1 Image View Thread : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:33:19 No.64775749 >>64775761 # >>64775861 # : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:33:48 No.64775753 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:34:49 No.64775761 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)00:50:36 No.64775861 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)01:09:10 No.64776032 1626613300544.png 110 KВ PNG >>64775604 (OP) # I just got a 414, triple checked. sorry OP picrel. its you

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The greatest greentext | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No.627025189 16 minutes ago Got a story for ya. I'm not good at writing so bear with me. Ceci n'est pas une pen >A girl I knew in school was a total attention w----. >Never arrived to class on time and always made sure to make a huge fuss about it. >Didn't talk to her all that much but I did have a few conversations with her >Her wrists had cuts and burns all over them, she wore t shirts so she never hid them >l asked her why she was hurting herself like that >She said "No one loves me and my life is painful" etc etc >"No one loves you?" What about your parents or your boyfriend? >Answer she gave me was something like "They don't really love me" or some s--- >Made a point not to interact with her too much after that, because she's an attention w---- >End of the school year she came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go somewhere with her that Sunday >l'm not good with these situations so I couldn't say no even though I didn't like her >Sunday came and we went to the top of one of those tower car parks >Just as we got to the top she told me that she wanted me to be here as a witness to her suicide >Oh s---, I thought, she was going to jump and she was going to force me to watch >Had I known she was going to do this s--- I would never have gone with her >Not watching unless you do a flip, I said that to try and shock her into realizing this was stupid >Complete shock was written all over her face. She had thought l'd try to stop her >Ehh?! A-aren't you going to try to stop me? >Nah, go ahead. If you really wanted to live you'd stop yourself. >After a while she got down off the edge She walked up to me afterwards and tried to hug me with tears in her eyes but I told her I loved someone else. She asked me who and I told her to read the first letter of every line. 3 replies
Anonymous No.627025189 16 minutes ago Got a story for ya. I'm not good at writing so bear with me. Ceci n'est pas une pen >A girl I knew in school was a total attention w----. >Never arrived to class on time and always made sure to make a huge fuss about it. >Didn't talk to her all that much but I did have a few conversations with her >Her wrists had cuts and burns all over them, she wore t shirts so she never hid them >l asked her why she was hurting herself like that >She said "No one loves me and my life is painful" etc etc >"No one loves you?" What about your parents or your boyfriend? >Answer she gave me was something like "They don't really love me" or some s--- >Made a point not to interact with her too much after that, because she's an attention w---- >End of the school year she came up to me and asked me if I wanted to go somewhere with her that Sunday >l'm not good with these situations so I couldn't say no even though I didn't like her >Sunday came and we went to the top of one of those tower car parks >Just as we got to the top she told me that she wanted me to be here as a witness to her suicide >Oh s---, I thought, she was going to jump and she was going to force me to watch >Had I known she was going to do this s--- I would never have gone with her >Not watching unless you do a flip, I said that to try and shock her into realizing this was stupid >Complete shock was written all over her face. She had thought l'd try to stop her >Ehh?! A-aren't you going to try to stop me? >Nah, go ahead. If you really wanted to live you'd stop yourself. >After a while she got down off the edge She walked up to me afterwards and tried to hug me with tears in her eyes but I told her I loved someone else. She asked me who and I told her to read the first letter of every line. 3 replies

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Something fishy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)11:44:59 No.64780885 >order a pizza with anchovies because I want to try something new >the entire pizza tastes like unwashed p---- what a horrible mistake I've made 12 KB JPG
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)11:44:59 No.64780885 >order a pizza with anchovies because I want to try something new >the entire pizza tastes like unwashed p---- what a horrible mistake I've made 12 KB JPG

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