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Anon is in a Bind | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/24/17(Sun)19:15:01 No.754797723 >no social media >only go on reddit and 4chan >I hate reddit >4chan hates me 18 KB PNG
: Anonymous 12/24/17(Sun)19:15:01 No.754797723 >no social media >only go on reddit and 4chan >I hate reddit >4chan hates me 18 KB PNG

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Anon hates choking chickens | /r/Greentext

File: Brad.png (7 KB, 205x246) Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)18:53:25 No.860076027 >"Why yes I think homosexuals and marijuana users are degenerates" >Proceeds to masturbate multiple times a day This is at least 50% of you
File: Brad.png (7 KB, 205x246) Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)18:53:25 No.860076027 >"Why yes I think homosexuals and marijuana users are degenerates" >Proceeds to masturbate multiple times a day This is at least 50% of you

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Anon gets saved | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/27/21(Wed)17:15:19 No.845914110 >taking massive s--- >coming out sideways >hurts like hell >feel and hear anus tearing >losing lots of blood >pass out from blood loss >wake up around 15 minutes later 52 KB PNG >go to wipe >cleanwipe.doc >no blood, no s--- >feel around a------ >someone sewn up my gaping wound and cleaned it >blood and s--- still in toilet Thank you mystery a------ mender, i am forever in your debt
: Anonymous 01/27/21(Wed)17:15:19 No.845914110 >taking massive s--- >coming out sideways >hurts like hell >feel and hear anus tearing >losing lots of blood >pass out from blood loss >wake up around 15 minutes later 52 KB PNG >go to wipe >cleanwipe.doc >no blood, no s--- >feel around a------ >someone sewn up my gaping wound and cleaned it >blood and s--- still in toilet Thank you mystery a------ mender, i am forever in your debt

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Code Breaker | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:05:41 No.64781585 >No, I will not learn how to code 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:08:27 No.64781604 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:09:15 No.64781609 >>64781585 (OP)# >l'm glad you can find comfort in that, fellow non-coder >l, personally, am a self-hating non-programmer >l can write fizzbuzz in a couple of languages and that's about it 5 KB JPG >l wish I had the interest to continue pursuing this, but unfortunately, I find myself quite depressed and, hence, unable to work up motivation to anything other than post on 4channel. >We should compare our lack of notes sometime.
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:05:41 No.64781585 >No, I will not learn how to code 52 KB JPG : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:08:27 No.64781604 : Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)13:09:15 No.64781609 >>64781585 (OP)# >l'm glad you can find comfort in that, fellow non-coder >l, personally, am a self-hating non-programmer >l can write fizzbuzz in a couple of languages and that's about it 5 KB JPG >l wish I had the interest to continue pursuing this, but unfortunately, I find myself quite depressed and, hence, unable to work up motivation to anything other than post on 4channel. >We should compare our lack of notes sometime.

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anon eats ass | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:30:54 No.18759024 spugeboob.jpg 17 KB JPG >mfw I lick her bussy and it fart (stinky)
: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:30:54 No.18759024 spugeboob.jpg 17 KB JPG >mfw I lick her bussy and it fart (stinky)

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Anon gets a qt | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:46:36 No.785368644 >Be me >Be dating really hot middle eastern qt >Also niece of middle eastern president >FeelsBadman.jpeg Should I be scared? 92 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:48:30 No.785368751 >>785368644 (OP) # Lock her in your basement and ask for ransom you retard
: Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:46:36 No.785368644 >Be me >Be dating really hot middle eastern qt >Also niece of middle eastern president >FeelsBadman.jpeg Should I be scared? 92 KB JPG : Anonymous 11/20/18(Tue)12:48:30 No.785368751 >>785368644 (OP) # Lock her in your basement and ask for ransom you retard

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Anon Forgot His Autonomic Breathing Function | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Breathing on purpose 03/22/21(Mon)13:10:21 No.2063338 > be me > recalled from science class that breathing is involuntary > decide to do an experiment > think about breathing > try not to breate > works 37 KB JPG > try to breathe > works >I am in control now > forget how to re engage automatic breathing > cannot breathe unless consciously thinking about it > inhale > exhale > this is my life now > mfw View Thread
: Anonymous Breathing on purpose 03/22/21(Mon)13:10:21 No.2063338 > be me > recalled from science class that breathing is involuntary > decide to do an experiment > think about breathing > try not to breate > works 37 KB JPG > try to breathe > works >I am in control now > forget how to re engage automatic breathing > cannot breathe unless consciously thinking about it > inhale > exhale > this is my life now > mfw View Thread

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Anon Makes a Left Turn | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)16:36:18 No.64785615 >"The Olympics, that's pretty f------ gay." >Goes back to watching NASCAR 56 KB PNG
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)16:36:18 No.64785615 >"The Olympics, that's pretty f------ gay." >Goes back to watching NASCAR 56 KB PNG

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Anon Has a Decision to Make | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/10/21(Mon)00:04:09 No.63597231 >Straight >No friends >Never had a gf >Go to college >New guy in class comes in >He's openly gay and kind to everyone, including me. Literally an 1.82 MB PNG angel who could do noting wrong >We become good friends over time >A few months roll by >He confesses to me >Says he always felt like this since he first met I don't know what to do anons, I don't want to break his heart and having a lover would be nice, but I don't know how people will view me. I don't want to be made fun of : Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)00:06:04 No.63597256 >>63597231 (OP) # Go get topped OP 13 KB PNG
: Anonymous 05/10/21(Mon)00:04:09 No.63597231 >Straight >No friends >Never had a gf >Go to college >New guy in class comes in >He's openly gay and kind to everyone, including me. Literally an 1.82 MB PNG angel who could do noting wrong >We become good friends over time >A few months roll by >He confesses to me >Says he always felt like this since he first met I don't know what to do anons, I don't want to break his heart and having a lover would be nice, but I don't know how people will view me. I don't want to be made fun of : Anonymous 05/10/21 (Mon)00:06:04 No.63597256 >>63597231 (OP) # Go get topped OP 13 KB PNG

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Anon goes to the dentist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)01:32:46 No.860068475 >be me >go to dentist appointment >dentist is a woman >puts her fingers in my mouth >fingers >in 53 KB PNG >my >mouth >women finger themselves >using their fingers Later virgins
: Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)01:32:46 No.860068475 >be me >go to dentist appointment >dentist is a woman >puts her fingers in my mouth >fingers >in 53 KB PNG >my >mouth >women finger themselves >using their fingers Later virgins

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Anon visit balkans | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 11/05/19(Tue)12:04:17 No.55203020 >be me >migrate from canada to some ex yugoslavia country cause my dad was from there >think that i'll be chad from abroad and sufocate in p--- 71 KB JPG no >balkan state of mind is natural trolling in its purest forn >be balkan trolled for decsdes >develope anxiety and depression >they have thick skin and dont react to trolling >start to become balkan chad go back to gay snowflake canada and drown in p--- thank you balkan
Anonymous 11/05/19(Tue)12:04:17 No.55203020 >be me >migrate from canada to some ex yugoslavia country cause my dad was from there >think that i'll be chad from abroad and sufocate in p--- 71 KB JPG no >balkan state of mind is natural trolling in its purest forn >be balkan trolled for decsdes >develope anxiety and depression >they have thick skin and dont react to trolling >start to become balkan chad go back to gay snowflake canada and drown in p--- thank you balkan

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Raise your glasses | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)09:06:29 No.64779361 >be me >4 am >finish watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World in a call >friend says he needs to piss >"maybe i should piss in a glass" >silence 98 KB PNG >everyone there dares him to do it >2 minutes >sends image of a glass filled with his own piss, with obvious piss stains on the desk around it >mfw
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)09:06:29 No.64779361 >be me >4 am >finish watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World in a call >friend says he needs to piss >"maybe i should piss in a glass" >silence 98 KB PNG >everyone there dares him to do it >2 minutes >sends image of a glass filled with his own piss, with obvious piss stains on the desk around it >mfw

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Anon prefers bing | /r/Greentext

1500590969099.jpg (78 KB, 346x450) google yandex >make post criticizing google >next captcha shows street near my house
1500590969099.jpg (78 KB, 346x450) google yandex >make post criticizing google >next captcha shows street near my house

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Anon Remembers | /r/Greentext

File: mfw.jpg (9 KB, 360x287) Anonymous 02/28/21(Sun)12:35:44 No.848511858 > googling Alzheimer's symptoms > all the links are purple. >mfw
File: mfw.jpg (9 KB, 360x287) Anonymous 02/28/21(Sun)12:35:44 No.848511858 > googling Alzheimer's symptoms > all the links are purple. >mfw

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Anon hasn’t discovers yet that his gf is imaginary | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)22:51:42 No.860059814 >be me >had birthday >last piece of cake is left >gf asks if she can have it >"only for a kiss" >"no thanks" 275 KB JPG >one hour later, came into kitchen >last piece is still untouched She's slowly losing interest in me and there's nothing I can do
: Anonymous 07/31/21(Sat)22:51:42 No.860059814 >be me >had birthday >last piece of cake is left >gf asks if she can have it >"only for a kiss" >"no thanks" 275 KB JPG >one hour later, came into kitchen >last piece is still untouched She's slowly losing interest in me and there's nothing I can do

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Anon doesn't fall for it | /r/Greentext

File: chad.jpg (65 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:46:40 No.860066000 [Reply] >read all 318 pages of the terms and conditions >clicks disagree
File: chad.jpg (65 KB, 1068x601) O Anonymous 08/01/21(Sun)00:46:40 No.860066000 [Reply] >read all 318 pages of the terms and conditions >clicks disagree

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Anon likes blonde girls | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:40:38 No.64191077 >theres probably a cute blonde girl pooping somewhere right now 50 KB PNG 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:43:46 No.64191120 >>64191077 (OP) I wonder if her poop smells like candy and rainbows 86 KB JPG
: Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:40:38 No.64191077 >theres probably a cute blonde girl pooping somewhere right now 50 KB PNG 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread : Anonymous 06/17/21(Thu)20:43:46 No.64191120 >>64191077 (OP) I wonder if her poop smells like candy and rainbows 86 KB JPG

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When in trouble, stab yourself! | /r/Greentext

Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me 138 KB PNG >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided
Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me 138 KB PNG >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided

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Anon... uhhhhh... I can’t really think of a title | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: MTÉSWNOT ) Will the GirlsDoPorn case chan...) 11/07/19(Thu)20:40:46 No.232474502 file not found.png 793 KB PNG We've had some good discussions on this. To recap the situation: >Girl turns 18, strapped for cash to pay for tuition, looks for modeling ads on craigslist. >Finds a gig offering $5,000 for tasteful bikini shoot >They offer to fly girl to San Diego, pay for a 5-star suite, etc. >Once there on set, girl is told she will do hardcore p--- and take a facial >Girl tries to back out and is screamed at, insulted, told she is worthless and will have to reimburse the company for the tickets and suite >ls further told the video will be sold only on DVD to wealthy Australians, no one back home will know >2 months later, video is released on the internet complete with girl's real name and hometown, the producers purposefully made sure her friends/family found out >Girls life is ruined, quits school, often turns to booze This happened to over 500 girls. Now the FBI has arrested the employees and they are facing life in prison for sex trafficking.
: Anonymous (ID: MTÉSWNOT ) Will the GirlsDoPorn case chan...) 11/07/19(Thu)20:40:46 No.232474502 file not found.png 793 KB PNG We've had some good discussions on this. To recap the situation: >Girl turns 18, strapped for cash to pay for tuition, looks for modeling ads on craigslist. >Finds a gig offering $5,000 for tasteful bikini shoot >They offer to fly girl to San Diego, pay for a 5-star suite, etc. >Once there on set, girl is told she will do hardcore p--- and take a facial >Girl tries to back out and is screamed at, insulted, told she is worthless and will have to reimburse the company for the tickets and suite >ls further told the video will be sold only on DVD to wealthy Australians, no one back home will know >2 months later, video is released on the internet complete with girl's real name and hometown, the producers purposefully made sure her friends/family found out >Girls life is ruined, quits school, often turns to booze This happened to over 500 girls. Now the FBI has arrested the employees and they are facing life in prison for sex trafficking.

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Anon has shitty parents | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(..) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe is Ast ver futM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.
: Anonymous Traumatizing Childhood Stories(..) 06/01/20(Mon)20:21:02 No.58447994 >little brother is diagnosed, by a professional, with severe depression >Boomer dad is convinced he's just being a little bitch >"stop acting sad all the f------ THe is Ast ver futM Qure 236 KB PNG time" x100 >dad locks him out of the house so he'll "learn to be normal" >dad tosses his medication away because medicine is expensive >only let's him take his meds when our school finds out and gets CPS involved >dad makes a scene every time we take him to the doctors >little bro can't take it anymore >tells him he can't take this s--- anymore >dad slams his gun on the living room table >"If you're really so f------ sad you'd kill yourself!" >BANG >rip, little buddy >mom running from the kitchen screaming >dad being put in handcuffs screaming "it wasn't my fault" >taken out of school for a bit and into therapy >dad still swears to this day it was the doctors medication that made Daniel kill himself It's been ten f------ years and it still eats away at me. There's nothing worse than being born to dumb f------ parents.

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