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Anon visits his parents | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous Share moments where you f-----(…..) 06/28/21(Mon)11:00:25 No.64345840 SON Literally today >be me >visit parents >zoned out because long drive >mom says she has skin cancer >automatically say "Congratulations" because I'm zoned out I AM DISAPPOINT 400 KB JPG >dad looks disappointed and walks out of the room >mfw pic related 3 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous Share moments where you f-----(…..) 06/28/21(Mon)11:00:25 No.64345840 SON Literally today >be me >visit parents >zoned out because long drive >mom says she has skin cancer >automatically say "Congratulations" because I'm zoned out I AM DISAPPOINT 400 KB JPG >dad looks disappointed and walks out of the room >mfw pic related 3 Replies View Thread

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Anon smokes weed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:14:58 No.857820660 >smoke weed everyday >become paranoid >think everyone has a problem with me >start acting wierdly, control every move and thought in case they can read it >people actually start making comments about me I am Mclovin. 17 KB JPG >think I'm just being delusional and no one cares in reality, so respond nothing and change nothing >once in a while a comment is clear enough for me to be sure that someone said it but still feel paranoid and weak so respond nothing and act as if not just me, but everyone else misheard it. That would make my villain look stupid >spiraling down >kys? 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:14:58 No.857820660 >smoke weed everyday >become paranoid >think everyone has a problem with me >start acting wierdly, control every move and thought in case they can read it >people actually start making comments about me I am Mclovin. 17 KB JPG >think I'm just being delusional and no one cares in reality, so respond nothing and change nothing >once in a while a comment is clear enough for me to be sure that someone said it but still feel paranoid and weak so respond nothing and act as if not just me, but everyone else misheard it. That would make my villain look stupid >spiraling down >kys? 2 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon googles greentext | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/14/20(Mon)01:10:39 No.163566498 >Be the protagonist of this new novel >Be a cis man >neat >Put on girl's clothes even though this isn't the specific experience of one British woman >Go into women's bathroom >Go to Twitter app 246 KB PNG >Bully celebrated author JK Rowling for absolutely no reason, she's never been wrong at all, she's actually very smart and good and if you bully her, it's only going to make her opinions come back stronger and more powerful, leave her alone, she's a feminist hero
Anonymous 09/14/20(Mon)01:10:39 No.163566498 >Be the protagonist of this new novel >Be a cis man >neat >Put on girl's clothes even though this isn't the specific experience of one British woman >Go into women's bathroom >Go to Twitter app 246 KB PNG >Bully celebrated author JK Rowling for absolutely no reason, she's never been wrong at all, she's actually very smart and good and if you bully her, it's only going to make her opinions come back stronger and more powerful, leave her alone, she's a feminist hero

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Anon Gets Fit & Gay | /r/Greentext

File: genderidentitychart.jpg (133 KB, 1280x720) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:11:23 No.857820428 >Try to bit fitness Chad >Walk into local gym >Gym sloots as far as the eyes can see >10/10 thot on leg press >Cheeks could easily suffocate an infant >Get closer look and see the beans and frank Guess i'm gay now happy pride f------
File: genderidentitychart.jpg (133 KB, 1280x720) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:11:23 No.857820428 >Try to bit fitness Chad >Walk into local gym >Gym sloots as far as the eyes can see >10/10 thot on leg press >Cheeks could easily suffocate an infant >Get closer look and see the beans and frank Guess i'm gay now happy pride f------

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Anon is a poet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: miuDQCso ) 12/08/19(Sun)10:02:09 No.235544335 Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious profile of a tinder w---- while I read it, nearly swiping, suddenly I spied her typing "Kids? Still want them!" starts the griping, "even 122 KB JPG though I'm 44" "Tis impossible," I muttered "having kids at 44" Chance of offspring: nevermore >>235544846 # >>235545117 # >>235546408 # >>235547541 # >>235548662 # >>235552925 # >>235557647 # >>235557957 #
: Anonymous (ID: miuDQCso ) 12/08/19(Sun)10:02:09 No.235544335 Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, over many a quaint and curious profile of a tinder w---- while I read it, nearly swiping, suddenly I spied her typing "Kids? Still want them!" starts the griping, "even 122 KB JPG though I'm 44" "Tis impossible," I muttered "having kids at 44" Chance of offspring: nevermore >>235544846 # >>235545117 # >>235546408 # >>235547541 # >>235548662 # >>235552925 # >>235557647 # >>235557957 #

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Anon does something | /r/Greentext

File: imagem_2021-06-27_152529.png (68 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:28:15 No.857794557 ► >>857794574 >>857794728 >>857795257 >/b/ me >never seen an actual greentext on /b/ >hmmm.jpeg >decide to make one for the funny >be you >reading this >massive f----- >reply "kys" >> O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:28:31 No.857794574 ► >>857794557 (OP) kys
File: imagem_2021-06-27_152529.png (68 KB, 225x225) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:28:15 No.857794557 ► >>857794574 >>857794728 >>857795257 >/b/ me >never seen an actual greentext on /b/ >hmmm.jpeg >decide to make one for the funny >be you >reading this >massive f----- >reply "kys" >> O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:28:31 No.857794574 ► >>857794557 (OP) kys

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Anon has question | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:43:19 No.857810547 >You get handed this at the store as change >wat do ww.N HOLKANN 135 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:05 No.857810801 >>857810547 (OP) # I immediately burn it and leave the ashes on the counter >>857811083 # : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:45 No.857810852 call the police : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:58 No.857810867 >>857810547 (OP)_# put it in my wallet and leave the store : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:48:20 No.857810901 i place it at the back of my wallet >>857810939 # >>857811198 # >>857811412 # : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:48:55 No.857810939 >>857810901 # kek
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:43:19 No.857810547 >You get handed this at the store as change >wat do ww.N HOLKANN 135 KB JPG : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:05 No.857810801 >>857810547 (OP) # I immediately burn it and leave the ashes on the counter >>857811083 # : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:45 No.857810852 call the police : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:47:58 No.857810867 >>857810547 (OP)_# put it in my wallet and leave the store : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:48:20 No.857810901 i place it at the back of my wallet >>857810939 # >>857811198 # >>857811412 # : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)18:48:55 No.857810939 >>857810901 # kek

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Anon is lucky | /r/Greentext

File: unknown[1].png (120 KB, 287x255) Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)20:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i still get to bang her
File: unknown[1].png (120 KB, 287x255) Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)20:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i still get to bang her

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anon solves the homeless problem | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >L leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas
: Anonymous 06/22/21(Tue)18:57:42 No.857446821 >be me, 28 year old Texas f-- >live in Corpus Christi >love it here but city has a bad homeless problem >get sick of it and take matters into my own hands 272 KB JPG >last week find a hobo walking through grocery store parking lot in morning >strike up conversation and befriend him >offer to pay him $200 if he helps me move furniture out of my house in Austin >he agrees >I don't have house in Austin >we go to Austin, ~4 hour drive >he gets out to use bathroom in gas station in random n---- ghetto >L leave him and drive back to corpus Is relocating the homeless to s--- cities the answer we've been looking for? I think next weekend I'm gonna pick up 3 hobos and leave them in Dallas

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Anon gets serious | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:04:33 No.857819982 Girl suffers life-changing bowel injury after two rounds of a--- sex with n------ Teen suffers life-changing injury trying to imitate p--- >In a tragic case illustrating the sinister effects of online p---, a 16-year-old girl's bowel was so badly injured during group a--- sex that she needs to use a colostomy bag for the rest of her life. 127 KB JPG >The teen reportedly suffered the life-changing injury while copying scenes from the hardcore p--- website BLACKED.COM >But, sadly, Nebraska's 1110 KFAB was told that the girl's horrific experience was just one in a string of serious injuries to result from p----addicted Americans trying to imitate aggressive sex they've watched online. >General Practitioners president Dr. Bastian Seidel said "We have seen a--- fissures more and more. I've seen that more in women, so that's caused by men having a--- sex with women". What we've been noticing just recently is a sharp increase in teenage girls displaying these same complications and unfortunately more serious complications, he said. >KFAB's hard-hitting investigation also revealed the horrendous experience of a woman, "Sarah," whose former boyfriend forced her into having a--- sex. >The 41-year-old was left with nerve damage to her bowel and can no longer cope with hugging her mom because she was so traumatized by the r---. >"In p----------, it's not how it is in real life. It's just not how it is. It looks like they enjoy it, but it really hurts," she said. 9 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)21:04:33 No.857819982 Girl suffers life-changing bowel injury after two rounds of a--- sex with n------ Teen suffers life-changing injury trying to imitate p--- >In a tragic case illustrating the sinister effects of online p---, a 16-year-old girl's bowel was so badly injured during group a--- sex that she needs to use a colostomy bag for the rest of her life. 127 KB JPG >The teen reportedly suffered the life-changing injury while copying scenes from the hardcore p--- website BLACKED.COM >But, sadly, Nebraska's 1110 KFAB was told that the girl's horrific experience was just one in a string of serious injuries to result from p----addicted Americans trying to imitate aggressive sex they've watched online. >General Practitioners president Dr. Bastian Seidel said "We have seen a--- fissures more and more. I've seen that more in women, so that's caused by men having a--- sex with women". What we've been noticing just recently is a sharp increase in teenage girls displaying these same complications and unfortunately more serious complications, he said. >KFAB's hard-hitting investigation also revealed the horrendous experience of a woman, "Sarah," whose former boyfriend forced her into having a--- sex. >The 41-year-old was left with nerve damage to her bowel and can no longer cope with hugging her mom because she was so traumatized by the r---. >"In p----------, it's not how it is in real life. It's just not how it is. It looks like they enjoy it, but it really hurts," she said. 9 Replies View Thread

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Anon gets laid | /r/Greentext

>>857842376 (OP) # >be me >lose virginity with a chick that me and my best friend were both into >save the used condom in a bag >show it to him the next day 42 KB JPG Yeah l've got the 'tism, still got laid tho.
>>857842376 (OP) # >be me >lose virginity with a chick that me and my best friend were both into >save the used condom in a bag >show it to him the next day 42 KB JPG Yeah l've got the 'tism, still got laid tho.

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Anon is retarded | /r/Greentext

RJDNZ2X/ (OP) 3h (6/28 6:48) · 38230918 19 Re · 3 Img · PNG · 13KB · (882 × 758) 9 Replies >doing a presentation at work >get a little nervous >take a sip from my water bottle >forgot the cap was on >hold it like l'm drinking for a couple of seconds >let it down >continue speaking >start hearing chuckling from co-workers
RJDNZ2X/ (OP) 3h (6/28 6:48) · 38230918 19 Re · 3 Img · PNG · 13KB · (882 × 758) 9 Replies >doing a presentation at work >get a little nervous >take a sip from my water bottle >forgot the cap was on >hold it like l'm drinking for a couple of seconds >let it down >continue speaking >start hearing chuckling from co-workers

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anon looks like rock hudson | /r/Greentext


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Anons mom leave him alone to use bathroom. | /r/Greentext


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Anon fucked up | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous I f----- up 06/28/21(Mon)00:19:57 No.64342990 >making out with girlfriend at her house >pretty intense, I pin her down and we are licking each others toungues, im drinking her saliva >"hold on anon" 88 KB JPG >she lifts up her shirt and bra, moves my hand to her right >for some reason autistically say "booba" >she immediately puts her bra back on and tells me to go home >we haven't spoken since Pic related 1 Reply View Thread
: Anonymous I f----- up 06/28/21(Mon)00:19:57 No.64342990 >making out with girlfriend at her house >pretty intense, I pin her down and we are licking each others toungues, im drinking her saliva >"hold on anon" 88 KB JPG >she lifts up her shirt and bra, moves my hand to her right >for some reason autistically say "booba" >she immediately puts her bra back on and tells me to go home >we haven't spoken since Pic related 1 Reply View Thread

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Anon's bad habit | /r/Greentext


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Anon eats some icecream | /r/Greentext

File: maxresdefault.jpg (59 KB, 1280x720) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:03:07 No.857808149 [Reply] >Be me >Tired from a long day and going to sleep >Cozy in my bed, almost sleeping >Hearing a weird sound outside my window >probaly_a_hobo.mp3 >Sleeping zzzzz >Hear a sound outside my door >ignore it start and sleeping again >hear a sound getting louder next my bed >wake up >there's a man with an ice cream standing next to me >he says: "binge binge binge" >He inserts the ice cream in my throat, slowly killing me >i die >glory to the ccp
File: maxresdefault.jpg (59 KB, 1280x720) O Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)15:03:07 No.857808149 [Reply] >Be me >Tired from a long day and going to sleep >Cozy in my bed, almost sleeping >Hearing a weird sound outside my window >probaly_a_hobo.mp3 >Sleeping zzzzz >Hear a sound outside my door >ignore it start and sleeping again >hear a sound getting louder next my bed >wake up >there's a man with an ice cream standing next to me >he says: "binge binge binge" >He inserts the ice cream in my throat, slowly killing me >i die >glory to the ccp

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Anon gets existential | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:11 No.857815440 >be you >be born as an innocent child >ffw many years >gathered hundreds, thousands of memories >be on /b/ 10 KB JPG >reading this post >the entirety of your life thus far has culminated into this one moment, reading a meta post on a website filled with p---, pedophiles, and criminally insane autists how does it feel, anon? : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:59 No.857815495 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:38 No.857815534 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:43 No.857815542 >>857815440 (OP) # Seeing as I'm one of the pedos? Just fine.
: Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:11 No.857815440 >be you >be born as an innocent child >ffw many years >gathered hundreds, thousands of memories >be on /b/ 10 KB JPG >reading this post >the entirety of your life thus far has culminated into this one moment, reading a meta post on a website filled with p---, pedophiles, and criminally insane autists how does it feel, anon? : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:56:59 No.857815495 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:38 No.857815534 : Anonymous 06/27/21(Sun)19:57:43 No.857815542 >>857815440 (OP) # Seeing as I'm one of the pedos? Just fine.

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Anon let's an anime character use the loo | /r/Greentext


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Anon hires a hooker | /r/Greentext

Fastest Eti 4G 5:33 AM O n 96% A boards.4chan.org Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home f v7-VIDEO GAMES ©2004 Moof : Anonymous 06/28/21(Mon)05:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my 120 KB PNG bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i sill get to bang her 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread
Fastest Eti 4G 5:33 AM O n 96% A boards.4chan.org Board /b/ - Random v Settings Mobile Home f v7-VIDEO GAMES ©2004 Moof : Anonymous 06/28/21(Mon)05:12:26 No.857820494 >be me >23 yo virgin >sick of being a virgin >order a h----- online >lives 5 miles away >she arrives and we're walking to my bedroom when she sees my 120 KB PNG bird room >she asks about my conure budgies and cockatiels >instead of banging we talk about birds and random s--- for 2 hours >she leaves without banging >still virgin >ffw 1 week >i get a knock on the door >its her >i invite her in and ask her why she's here >she says her pimp got shot and thinks im cute so she wants to stay with me >i say ok >ffw 2 years >married with 2 kids, 7 birds i sill get to bang her 3 Replies / 2 Images View Thread

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