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Shit why me | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous s--- why me 06/05/21 (Sat)20:04:17 No.9699557 >be me camping >have to take massive s--- >damnit.png >go to the creepy ass pit toilet >sitting on toilet taking massive s--- >hear buzzing above head >whatsthis.jpg 211 KB PNG >look up it's a frickin hornet >oh s--- >try and hurry up and lands next to me >nonono >flys directly up my anus >stings
: Anonymous s--- why me 06/05/21 (Sat)20:04:17 No.9699557 >be me camping >have to take massive s--- >damnit.png >go to the creepy ass pit toilet >sitting on toilet taking massive s--- >hear buzzing above head >whatsthis.jpg 211 KB PNG >look up it's a frickin hornet >oh s--- >try and hurry up and lands next to me >nonono >flys directly up my anus >stings

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Anon gets a girlfriend | /r/Greentext


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A rush and a push the land's ours | /r/Greentext


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Anon's son is gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:03:57 No.856917396 >be me >son is gay >sons boyfriend moves in with us >have to listen to them f------ all the time >gross moaning and screaming >poop smell wafts from room as they go to and from the shower 45 KB JPG >can't stand it anymore and politely ask them to find their own place as their behaviour is traumatic and pretty gross >my sons face when he decides to gay murder me instead of finding somewhere else to sex stink up Why son? 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:09:10 No.856917734 >>856917396 (OP) # Is that a man or a woman or one of those new fangled genders they make for attention?
: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:03:57 No.856917396 >be me >son is gay >sons boyfriend moves in with us >have to listen to them f------ all the time >gross moaning and screaming >poop smell wafts from room as they go to and from the shower 45 KB JPG >can't stand it anymore and politely ask them to find their own place as their behaviour is traumatic and pretty gross >my sons face when he decides to gay murder me instead of finding somewhere else to sex stink up Why son? 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:09:10 No.856917734 >>856917396 (OP) # Is that a man or a woman or one of those new fangled genders they make for attention?

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Anon gets ghosted | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:24:00 No.856918644 >Friends with her for years >Have a thing for one another >She shows it more and more >Starts to show feelings back >Immediately ghosts me >Stops wanting to do stuff all together 173 KB JPG >Years later she has done it to numerous other men >Use them for living space and money >Fake UwU personality streamer These hoes blow.
: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)18:24:00 No.856918644 >Friends with her for years >Have a thing for one another >She shows it more and more >Starts to show feelings back >Immediately ghosts me >Stops wanting to do stuff all together 173 KB JPG >Years later she has done it to numerous other men >Use them for living space and money >Fake UwU personality streamer These hoes blow.

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anon sees his crush at the gym | /r/Greentext

O The pain Anonymous 04/28/21(Wed)17:44:58 No.63429763 >See my gym crush working out >Too p---- to talk to her >Go up and use the machine next to her >She immediately gets off and goes somewhere else >Try to hide the pain >Míw on the inside
O The pain Anonymous 04/28/21(Wed)17:44:58 No.63429763 >See my gym crush working out >Too p---- to talk to her >Go up and use the machine next to her >She immediately gets off and goes somewhere else >Try to hide the pain >Míw on the inside

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Anon is nostalgic | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/01/21(Mon)16:23:22 No.62555204 >>62553781 (OP) # >late 90's >10 >would finish school on a friday >eat dinner and then turn on my 496 KB PNG N64 >play Mario Kart, Mario 64, Goldeneye etc >bed time at 11:00 >would get into bed >pretend to fall asleep >wait until my mother went to sleep >boot up my N64 again >play all night I'd love to go back to being that carefree. Just once.
: Anonymous 03/01/21(Mon)16:23:22 No.62555204 >>62553781 (OP) # >late 90's >10 >would finish school on a friday >eat dinner and then turn on my 496 KB PNG N64 >play Mario Kart, Mario 64, Goldeneye etc >bed time at 11:00 >would get into bed >pretend to fall asleep >wait until my mother went to sleep >boot up my N64 again >play all night I'd love to go back to being that carefree. Just once.

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Anon makes it | /r/Greentext

10:04 1 LTE A boards.4chan.org – Private Board /b/ - Random Settings Mobile Home : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:36:15 No.856932391 >be me >recovering from years of incel behavior >strike the courage to ask the girl out I really like from my parish >go on a couple of dates >wowfeelsgood.exe >I tell her I have a summer job out of state 70 miles 91 KB PNG away expect her to ghost me >she is interested in what I'm doing and promises to support me >literally calls me every night before I go to bed "goodnight anon sleep tight baby" >she visits I tell her I like it when she's a gentle dom >oh anon l'm so glad you're into that too I was worried for a minute >mfw she pays my head and tells me what a good boy I am : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:47:04 No.856932950 >>856932391 (OP) # That's good to hear Anon. An inspiration to other recovering incels. : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:58:22 No.856933526 >>856932391 (OP) # Living the Dream, happy for you Anon 1.12 MB GIF : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)22:01:27 No.856933692 good for you anoi. im super depresso lonely currently
10:04 1 LTE A boards.4chan.org – Private Board /b/ - Random Settings Mobile Home : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:36:15 No.856932391 >be me >recovering from years of incel behavior >strike the courage to ask the girl out I really like from my parish >go on a couple of dates >wowfeelsgood.exe >I tell her I have a summer job out of state 70 miles 91 KB PNG away expect her to ghost me >she is interested in what I'm doing and promises to support me >literally calls me every night before I go to bed "goodnight anon sleep tight baby" >she visits I tell her I like it when she's a gentle dom >oh anon l'm so glad you're into that too I was worried for a minute >mfw she pays my head and tells me what a good boy I am : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:47:04 No.856932950 >>856932391 (OP) # That's good to hear Anon. An inspiration to other recovering incels. : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)21:58:22 No.856933526 >>856932391 (OP) # Living the Dream, happy for you Anon 1.12 MB GIF : Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)22:01:27 No.856933692 good for you anoi. im super depresso lonely currently

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Alone in the Dark | /r/Greentext

Robot 04/15/18 (Sun) 04:02:29 No.253434 File: 84a55700b44f378---.png (7.45 MB, 2379x3212, 2379:3212, Light switch.png) >Middle school >Figured out how to shut off the bathroom lights with a paper clip >Picture related >Go to the bathroom every chance I get to check if anyone is using a stall >Wet paper towels and throw them to stick above the person s------- >"WHAT THE F---!?" >Shut off the lights before leaving >Get back to class smiling like an autist the rest of the day thinking about them sitting in the dark as wet paper towels fall down on to them The lights would always remain off the rest of the day until they got a janitor to turn them back on.
Robot 04/15/18 (Sun) 04:02:29 No.253434 File: 84a55700b44f378---.png (7.45 MB, 2379x3212, 2379:3212, Light switch.png) >Middle school >Figured out how to shut off the bathroom lights with a paper clip >Picture related >Go to the bathroom every chance I get to check if anyone is using a stall >Wet paper towels and throw them to stick above the person s------- >"WHAT THE F---!?" >Shut off the lights before leaving >Get back to class smiling like an autist the rest of the day thinking about them sitting in the dark as wet paper towels fall down on to them The lights would always remain off the rest of the day until they got a janitor to turn them back on.

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Anon is a champion | /r/Greentext

Anon · 12s (6/15 19:38) · 64162465 O Re · 0 Img · JPG·507KB · (1456 × 1078) >be me, 36 >khhv neet >watch Shrek 24/7 >mother is unable to evict me pic related
Anon · 12s (6/15 19:38) · 64162465 O Re · 0 Img · JPG·507KB · (1456 × 1078) >be me, 36 >khhv neet >watch Shrek 24/7 >mother is unable to evict me pic related

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Anon went to high school | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)03:25:52 No.856345759 >senior year in hs >take a s--- in the school toilets every morning during first class >pass by the janitor everytime >mfw he knows it's me who nearly clogs the toilet every morning >mfw he avoids my stare everytime Tell me your sigmale success stories below
Anonymous 06/08/21(Tue)03:25:52 No.856345759 >senior year in hs >take a s--- in the school toilets every morning during first class >pass by the janitor everytime >mfw he knows it's me who nearly clogs the toilet every morning >mfw he avoids my stare everytime Tell me your sigmale success stories below

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Anon gets a babysitter | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)17:34:05 No.856919272 >work at a scout camp in southern Missouri >first year with female staffers > the one that works with me is the stereotypical trad girl who incels drool over 6 KB JPG >already have a gf keep it together anon >it's been a month since we started working we get along great nothing serious >first week of camp I'm helping some scouts with some basketry they have to do for a merit badge >tell the scout to do it a certain way, (it's wrong) >trad girl comes out and laughs. Says I messed it up. >"guess l'm gonna have to babysit you anon" >F--- HOW DOES SHE KNOW IM INTO THAT S---
: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)17:34:05 No.856919272 >work at a scout camp in southern Missouri >first year with female staffers > the one that works with me is the stereotypical trad girl who incels drool over 6 KB JPG >already have a gf keep it together anon >it's been a month since we started working we get along great nothing serious >first week of camp I'm helping some scouts with some basketry they have to do for a merit badge >tell the scout to do it a certain way, (it's wrong) >trad girl comes out and laughs. Says I messed it up. >"guess l'm gonna have to babysit you anon" >F--- HOW DOES SHE KNOW IM INTO THAT S---

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Anon wins the Triwizard Tournament | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)09:59:58 No.152340406 > "Help, help! Cedric Diggory has been killed! Yes, Cedric Diggory, my main rival as Hogwarts Champion and object of Cho Chang's affection, has been killed in the maze! Voldemort did it! He's been dead for thirteen years, but he's back, and he killed Cedric! Don't ask how, no one ask how! There were no witnesses, please do not look for any! The other two Champions in the maze were cursed with Imperio! Don't bother fetching your Veritaserum, professor Snape, I believe it's al| been stolen. I am so upset right now! Has anyone seen Cho? When do I get the prize money?" 42 KB JPG
: Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)09:59:58 No.152340406 > "Help, help! Cedric Diggory has been killed! Yes, Cedric Diggory, my main rival as Hogwarts Champion and object of Cho Chang's affection, has been killed in the maze! Voldemort did it! He's been dead for thirteen years, but he's back, and he killed Cedric! Don't ask how, no one ask how! There were no witnesses, please do not look for any! The other two Champions in the maze were cursed with Imperio! Don't bother fetching your Veritaserum, professor Snape, I believe it's al| been stolen. I am so upset right now! Has anyone seen Cho? When do I get the prize money?" 42 KB JPG

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Fruitflies.jpg | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/16/21(Wed)01:21:06 No.856894951 >be me >one hour ago >forget that repair guys are coming to fix all the doors in apartment building >scheduled appointment is today for my apartment >wake up in a drugged out haze to an old 55 KB JPG man walking into my apartment >l'm a NEET hoarder that's mentally ill living off crypto >butt naked on the bed >fruitflies.jpg >garbageandshiteverywhere.jpg >he's visibly disgusted, asking if I knew he was coming >l say nothing >he says he'll come back in a few hours >start to panic and frantically getting rid of as much mess as possible I really wish God would just strike me down. I don't want to be alive anymore.
: Anonymous 06/16/21(Wed)01:21:06 No.856894951 >be me >one hour ago >forget that repair guys are coming to fix all the doors in apartment building >scheduled appointment is today for my apartment >wake up in a drugged out haze to an old 55 KB JPG man walking into my apartment >l'm a NEET hoarder that's mentally ill living off crypto >butt naked on the bed >fruitflies.jpg >garbageandshiteverywhere.jpg >he's visibly disgusted, asking if I knew he was coming >l say nothing >he says he'll come back in a few hours >start to panic and frantically getting rid of as much mess as possible I really wish God would just strike me down. I don't want to be alive anymore.

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Anon has failed at life | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)21:45:22 No.64132765 >I called my manager "mom" again 43 KB PNG
: Anonymous 06/13/21(Sun)21:45:22 No.64132765 >I called my manager "mom" again 43 KB PNG

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Anon is confused | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)20:05:34 No.155331- SUDDENLY >walking on street >notice girl >around 5'1" >dressed in a black tanktop with short black P--- skirt >wears those sandals with heels thingies >handbag my mom used to carry around in her early 30s >whataqtie.jpg >get closer >has the face of a 13 yo girl what the f--- is up with girls these days where they look 13, 21 and 30 at the very same time? w--, Chris?
Anonymous 06/15/21(Tue)20:05:34 No.155331- SUDDENLY >walking on street >notice girl >around 5'1" >dressed in a black tanktop with short black P--- skirt >wears those sandals with heels thingies >handbag my mom used to carry around in her early 30s >whataqtie.jpg >get closer >has the face of a 13 yo girl what the f--- is up with girls these days where they look 13, 21 and 30 at the very same time? w--, Chris?

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I've seen it a few days ago but couldn't post it... Here you go fam the | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)20:01:14 No.45799835 >actually shat myself at uni >currently sat in a pile of s--- na lecture please help anons what do? 25 KB JPG 69 Replies / 14 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)21:18:55 No.45801154 >>45800510 # Sometimes I just dont regret visiting this website, also put me in the screecap
: Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)20:01:14 No.45799835 >actually shat myself at uni >currently sat in a pile of s--- na lecture please help anons what do? 25 KB JPG 69 Replies / 14 Images View Thread : Anonymous 05/31/18(Thu)21:18:55 No.45801154 >>45800510 # Sometimes I just dont regret visiting this website, also put me in the screecap

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Anon is a hero | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/08/21 (Mon)18:28:51 No.846871295 i f----- up /b/ im scared >walking down the street to go to shop >hear loud painful howling sounds from a dog >walk towards sound into a park-like 8 KB JPG area >theres 2 teenagers throwing rocks at a dog >they are laughing their asses off >dog is trying to hide behind a trashcan in a laying position >feel EXTREME utter rage >have never in my 31 years of life on this planet felt so much anger >walk up behind the teenagers, they dont see me >punch one in the back of the head as hard as i can >kick the other one between the legs, also very hard >both fall to the ground >look at me in utter shuck >they walk away without saying a word >adrenaline still pumping >pet the dog, sit next to him for a few minutes then pick him up >carry him to a neighbour who lives 3 minutes away who has vet experiences >tell him found dog like this alone on the road they looked around 16-18+, how f----- am i if they go to the police? what should i do?
: Anonymous 02/08/21 (Mon)18:28:51 No.846871295 i f----- up /b/ im scared >walking down the street to go to shop >hear loud painful howling sounds from a dog >walk towards sound into a park-like 8 KB JPG area >theres 2 teenagers throwing rocks at a dog >they are laughing their asses off >dog is trying to hide behind a trashcan in a laying position >feel EXTREME utter rage >have never in my 31 years of life on this planet felt so much anger >walk up behind the teenagers, they dont see me >punch one in the back of the head as hard as i can >kick the other one between the legs, also very hard >both fall to the ground >look at me in utter shuck >they walk away without saying a word >adrenaline still pumping >pet the dog, sit next to him for a few minutes then pick him up >carry him to a neighbour who lives 3 minutes away who has vet experiences >tell him found dog like this alone on the road they looked around 16-18+, how f----- am i if they go to the police? what should i do?

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Anon goes to the gym | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 4 days ago 55797858: >>55797485 (OP) >be me to showers] >chad body, assburgers mindset >don't be blond twink who squats in the smith machine >don't want to stare [retreats >he has thot levels of thick glutes >tiny wasp waist and slim hips >some modest muscle development in arms and chest >nothing compared to his massive glutes >weird and obscene body type that puzzles me COVER YOUR N------ >still be me t thanks.. >happen to come into locker room right after twink comes out of showers with a towel wrapped around his hips >don't be old beergut retiree boomer who spends seven hours a day in the sauna and in the locker room, every single day >beergut guy is walking around bare naked like usual >see things happening as if in slow motion >gym twink is trying to get his clothes from his locker while his towel slowly slides down >huge glutes are in danger of exposure >old beergut guy approaches reaching for the twink >not sure what he's trying to do but I don't like it >jump up in between them and yell >"Touch him and I'll tear you limb from limb." Didn't know my voice goes that low >old beergut skedaddles back into the sauna >turn around, look down at gym twink >he stutters, th-thanks >say 'Cover your n------." >turn around and head to the showers, still in shorts and socks >stay in there thirty minutes >he's gone when I come out How do I save this, /fit/? 21 REPLIES
Anonymous 4 days ago 55797858: >>55797485 (OP) >be me to showers] >chad body, assburgers mindset >don't be blond twink who squats in the smith machine >don't want to stare [retreats >he has thot levels of thick glutes >tiny wasp waist and slim hips >some modest muscle development in arms and chest >nothing compared to his massive glutes >weird and obscene body type that puzzles me COVER YOUR N------ >still be me t thanks.. >happen to come into locker room right after twink comes out of showers with a towel wrapped around his hips >don't be old beergut retiree boomer who spends seven hours a day in the sauna and in the locker room, every single day >beergut guy is walking around bare naked like usual >see things happening as if in slow motion >gym twink is trying to get his clothes from his locker while his towel slowly slides down >huge glutes are in danger of exposure >old beergut guy approaches reaching for the twink >not sure what he's trying to do but I don't like it >jump up in between them and yell >"Touch him and I'll tear you limb from limb." Didn't know my voice goes that low >old beergut skedaddles back into the sauna >turn around, look down at gym twink >he stutters, th-thanks >say 'Cover your n------." >turn around and head to the showers, still in shorts and socks >stay in there thirty minutes >he's gone when I come out How do I save this, /fit/? 21 REPLIES

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anon meets his neighbour | /r/Greentext


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