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Anon notices something | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous is this normal? 03/04/23 (Sat) 09:43:00 No.72443212 680 KB JPG is this actually normal or should i do something about this >be me >having sex with girlfriend >look at her a------ and notice there is s--- on it >tell her about it >she says it's normal for people to have and to not worry about it i personally am not sure this is normal because at least for me i always try to keep my body very clean. should i do something about this or should i just forget about it? 5 Replies View Thread
: Anonymous is this normal? 03/04/23 (Sat) 09:43:00 No.72443212 680 KB JPG is this actually normal or should i do something about this >be me >having sex with girlfriend >look at her a------ and notice there is s--- on it >tell her about it >she says it's normal for people to have and to not worry about it i personally am not sure this is normal because at least for me i always try to keep my body very clean. should i do something about this or should i just forget about it? 5 Replies View Thread

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100 IQ play | /r/Greentext

1 hr ago Anonymous 1745713917 > Now, I'm sure many of you have encountered little s---- in supermarkets. > Little kids running about and knocking things over, being rude, walking all over their parents, you know the kind. > But the worst are the biters. Yes, those little c---- that feel it is okay to bite you whenever they feel like it. > Okay, here's the best part. A biter got me today when I was grocery stopping. He broke the f------ skin, too. > This was when the gears started turning. > The moment I saw a tiny sprickle of blood on the little s---'s teeth as he was grinning at me like the little c--- he is. > I made my eyes get wide, and started screaming "S---! S---!." > Now, my good friend, Tom we'll call him, was there too, and he instantly picked up on it. > He started shouting "F---! MAYBE HE DIDN'T GET IT! F---!." > By now, the kid is scared shitless and starts crying. > Mizz Mom appears out of nowhere and starts getting pissy at us for yelling at her kid. > Here's the kicker, I look her straight in the eye and say > "Mam, get your son tested as soon as possible, he just bit me and I'm... I'm F------ HIV POSITIVE." > And now there is silence. Not a peep in the entire store. > The brat knows he just f----- up big time because his mom isn't defending his ass. > She just stares at me wide eyed. > I walk away from them, buy my s--- from the wide eyed cashier > All the while blood is dripping from my calf, making a nice little trail on the floor. > And, just as we leave, we start to hear the mother sobbing. Sobbing like the c--- she is. > I have never felt any more satisfaction than the moment I heard that s--.
1 hr ago Anonymous 1745713917 > Now, I'm sure many of you have encountered little s---- in supermarkets. > Little kids running about and knocking things over, being rude, walking all over their parents, you know the kind. > But the worst are the biters. Yes, those little c---- that feel it is okay to bite you whenever they feel like it. > Okay, here's the best part. A biter got me today when I was grocery stopping. He broke the f------ skin, too. > This was when the gears started turning. > The moment I saw a tiny sprickle of blood on the little s---'s teeth as he was grinning at me like the little c--- he is. > I made my eyes get wide, and started screaming "S---! S---!." > Now, my good friend, Tom we'll call him, was there too, and he instantly picked up on it. > He started shouting "F---! MAYBE HE DIDN'T GET IT! F---!." > By now, the kid is scared shitless and starts crying. > Mizz Mom appears out of nowhere and starts getting pissy at us for yelling at her kid. > Here's the kicker, I look her straight in the eye and say > "Mam, get your son tested as soon as possible, he just bit me and I'm... I'm F------ HIV POSITIVE." > And now there is silence. Not a peep in the entire store. > The brat knows he just f----- up big time because his mom isn't defending his ass. > She just stares at me wide eyed. > I walk away from them, buy my s--- from the wide eyed cashier > All the while blood is dripping from my calf, making a nice little trail on the floor. > And, just as we leave, we start to hear the mother sobbing. Sobbing like the c--- she is. > I have never felt any more satisfaction than the moment I heard that s--.

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Anon is bisexual | /r/Greentext

03/27/20(Fri)13:13:09 No.14994822 : Anonymous >Be me, proud bisexual >Browsing 4chan >See a thread with a cute sheep boi picture so i click on it to see whats up >Gets informed bisexuals are in fact not real >Hand begins to go transparent >Memories begin to fade >The illusion of my own existence has been shattered >Clothes begin to fall through my incorporeal form >Quickly try to type a reply as some sick last ditch effort to prove my own existence
03/27/20(Fri)13:13:09 No.14994822 : Anonymous >Be me, proud bisexual >Browsing 4chan >See a thread with a cute sheep boi picture so i click on it to see whats up >Gets informed bisexuals are in fact not real >Hand begins to go transparent >Memories begin to fade >The illusion of my own existence has been shattered >Clothes begin to fall through my incorporeal form >Quickly try to type a reply as some sick last ditch effort to prove my own existence

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Anon has a collection | /r/Greentext


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Anon fires a client | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/05/21 (Fri)11:08:47 No.60183754 >be personal trainer >ask fatty to track steps and take daily walks >weeks pass >still fat, even a bit larger >step counter measuring 30K+ >press for answers >waffles >>60185043 >start getting angry, get story >guy wrapped it in socks and stuck it in his dryer and stuffed his fat f------ face all day First time I ever fired a client.
Anonymous 03/05/21 (Fri)11:08:47 No.60183754 >be personal trainer >ask fatty to track steps and take daily walks >weeks pass >still fat, even a bit larger >step counter measuring 30K+ >press for answers >waffles >>60185043 >start getting angry, get story >guy wrapped it in socks and stuck it in his dryer and stuffed his fat f------ face all day First time I ever fired a client.

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Quiet speaks | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 16 minutes ago 0466F08A-D74B-4A95-BC43-B1C3CEA872AF.jpg (69 KB, 1280x720) 629738957 Money >"I'm a 'shotacon', as they call it in Japan." Joosten says, smiling. "It's considered the norm there for attractive women, and I secretly think it's the same way here too - it's just that the patriarchy has tried to convince us that gross, old, limp dicked men (over 20) are still attractive. Any reasonable woman prefers her boys young. I'm a proud shotacon!" What did she mean by this?
Anonymous 16 minutes ago 0466F08A-D74B-4A95-BC43-B1C3CEA872AF.jpg (69 KB, 1280x720) 629738957 Money >"I'm a 'shotacon', as they call it in Japan." Joosten says, smiling. "It's considered the norm there for attractive women, and I secretly think it's the same way here too - it's just that the patriarchy has tried to convince us that gross, old, limp dicked men (over 20) are still attractive. Any reasonable woman prefers her boys young. I'm a proud shotacon!" What did she mean by this?

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anon stands up to piss | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 66 KB JPG 03/04/23 (Sat)02:12:56 No.72441766 >Be me >Bunga >Me take s--- with friend Oog >Squat as usual >Have piss >Me decide to do trick for Oog >"Hey Oog, check out" >I stand up to piss >Oog is amaze >Oog start stand up to pee >Oog now show rest tribe trick >Mfw all man in tribe stand up to pee now >Mfw know this definitely trend which will die in 2 moon View Thread
: Anonymous 66 KB JPG 03/04/23 (Sat)02:12:56 No.72441766 >Be me >Bunga >Me take s--- with friend Oog >Squat as usual >Have piss >Me decide to do trick for Oog >"Hey Oog, check out" >I stand up to piss >Oog is amaze >Oog start stand up to pee >Oog now show rest tribe trick >Mfw all man in tribe stand up to pee now >Mfw know this definitely trend which will die in 2 moon View Thread

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Anon is awarded | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/03/23(Fri)21:04:35 >Be at work in last day of training. >Be socially awkward guy. >One of the oldest of the group, 28, average is 20 - 23. >Coworkers make silly activity of giving "awards". >Everyone hugs with the two people presenting the activity; a guy and a girl.. >Is my turn, dipshits give me the most silent guy award. No.895319865 36 KB JPG >Go to front, anxious, feeling awkward. >Looks at the guy and he steps back, the girl gives the paper with the "award" at the same time that she steps backs from me. >Be the only one not hugged from the team. This happened today, I hate people some f------ much, I'm just here for the paycheck, yet they make go through this.
: Anonymous 03/03/23(Fri)21:04:35 >Be at work in last day of training. >Be socially awkward guy. >One of the oldest of the group, 28, average is 20 - 23. >Coworkers make silly activity of giving "awards". >Everyone hugs with the two people presenting the activity; a guy and a girl.. >Is my turn, dipshits give me the most silent guy award. No.895319865 36 KB JPG >Go to front, anxious, feeling awkward. >Looks at the guy and he steps back, the girl gives the paper with the "award" at the same time that she steps backs from me. >Be the only one not hugged from the team. This happened today, I hate people some f------ much, I'm just here for the paycheck, yet they make go through this.

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"Somebody's watchin' me, and I have no privacy" | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 40 minutes ago count.jpg (179.2 KB, 700x875) 72437160 >be me >start tweaking on meth >suddenly feel like reality is collapsing in on itself >can hear the government's secret messages in my head >aliens are trying to take over the world >the voices in my head are telling me to build a time machine >convinced that I'm the only one who can save the world >start seeing shadow people everywhere >they're watching me, waiting for me to slip up >time starts moving backwards >can't tell if it's yesterday or tomorrow >every person I see is a government agent >have to keep moving, have to stay one step ahead >the truth is out there, I just have to find it >meth is the key to unlocking the secrets of the universe >gotta keep tweaking, gotta keep searching >everything is connected, everything is a clue >don't trust anyone, not even yourself >the end is nigh, and only I can stop it.
Anonymous 40 minutes ago count.jpg (179.2 KB, 700x875) 72437160 >be me >start tweaking on meth >suddenly feel like reality is collapsing in on itself >can hear the government's secret messages in my head >aliens are trying to take over the world >the voices in my head are telling me to build a time machine >convinced that I'm the only one who can save the world >start seeing shadow people everywhere >they're watching me, waiting for me to slip up >time starts moving backwards >can't tell if it's yesterday or tomorrow >every person I see is a government agent >have to keep moving, have to stay one step ahead >the truth is out there, I just have to find it >meth is the key to unlocking the secrets of the universe >gotta keep tweaking, gotta keep searching >everything is connected, everything is a clue >don't trust anyone, not even yourself >the end is nigh, and only I can stop it.

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Anon sneeds | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/03/23(Fri)18:09:51 No.72434091 166 KB JPG >I sneed, I sneed, I sneed, >The world may suck, and mald and seeth, >But I'll cope, with pics of womens feet, >For in the face of every bait, >I'll choose to rise above the hate. >I sneed, I sneed, I sneed, >To find the courage to proceed, >When the world is full of shitpost, >And the trolls are at their utmost. >So bring on sneed and bring on mald, >I'll cope with all that may befall, >And though my soul may seeth and burn, >I'll never falter, never turn. >For I am the master of my fate, >Sneed and Mald can't seal my gate. View Thread
: Anonymous 03/03/23(Fri)18:09:51 No.72434091 166 KB JPG >I sneed, I sneed, I sneed, >The world may suck, and mald and seeth, >But I'll cope, with pics of womens feet, >For in the face of every bait, >I'll choose to rise above the hate. >I sneed, I sneed, I sneed, >To find the courage to proceed, >When the world is full of shitpost, >And the trolls are at their utmost. >So bring on sneed and bring on mald, >I'll cope with all that may befall, >And though my soul may seeth and burn, >I'll never falter, never turn. >For I am the master of my fate, >Sneed and Mald can't seal my gate. View Thread

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Anon prevents the Horus Heresy | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous olkee 12/14/22(Wed) 20:40:07 No.621199297 fb0cd81ad8f7fafa5f357835b5d564d0.png 528 KB PNG >>621192917 # >>621195040 # >raising your primarch daughters right >fem-emp wife who doesn't know how to interact with your children so she has you be the main caregiver parental figure >having to settle arguments between her and your daughters >having to stand between multiple 12 foot plus demi gods arguing >going on military campaigns with them while trying to help them with their respective issues >helping mend the ties between their sisters and their mother realizing the greatest heresy is having a dysfunctional family
: Anonymous olkee 12/14/22(Wed) 20:40:07 No.621199297 fb0cd81ad8f7fafa5f357835b5d564d0.png 528 KB PNG >>621192917 # >>621195040 # >raising your primarch daughters right >fem-emp wife who doesn't know how to interact with your children so she has you be the main caregiver parental figure >having to settle arguments between her and your daughters >having to stand between multiple 12 foot plus demi gods arguing >going on military campaigns with them while trying to help them with their respective issues >helping mend the ties between their sisters and their mother realizing the greatest heresy is having a dysfunctional family

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potential sleeper cell, could be part of a psyop | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/12/23(Sun)15:50:28 No.34066471 >Just finish a long ass shift at a PETULA CLARK DOWN restaurant I used to work at. It was TOWN around the holidays and we were fairly busy. >We're closed and I'm in the backroom alone getting my stuff together before I leave. 19 KB JPG >Putting on a heavy jacket since I walk to work and it's dark and snowing outside. >There are about 3 or 4 other people closing up with me, so I'm not completely alone or anything. Not really important to the story but just some context. >As I'm collecting my things there's still music playing over the speakers throughout the restaurant. >At this point I'm tired but I was used to my hours and felt completely fine and normal. >Downtown by Petula Clark starts playing. >Have never listened to this song before, but I felt a wave of uneasiness the second it started to play. >Instantly feel lightheaded and numb, I stumble backwards and almost fall down, catching myself on a shelf. >Sit on the floor and feel very weird and paranoid, have never felt this way before. It was what I imagine a panic attack would feel like, I guess. >I sit and breathe until the song stops, that's when I get myself up and I instantly start feeling better. >I have no history of fainting or anything of the sort. That wasn't the weird part though. >Like two days later. >Guy in Nashville detonates a car bomb, before exploding he was playing sounds on a speaker. >He was also playing Downtown by Petula Clark. >Probably a massive coincidence, but it's still very weird. I have never reacted that way in regard to anything before or since. >Also, we were a "sportsy" bar place, why did we have some old ass slow 60s song playing? I worked there for over a year and that was the first and last time I ever heard that song play. All our managers (managers were the only ones that could change the music) were in their late 20s or early 30s so it wasn't some boomer playing old music he liked. >It still confuses me to this day. Hopefully I'm not some sleeper agent that activates to Downtown by Petula Clark.
: Anonymous 02/12/23(Sun)15:50:28 No.34066471 >Just finish a long ass shift at a PETULA CLARK DOWN restaurant I used to work at. It was TOWN around the holidays and we were fairly busy. >We're closed and I'm in the backroom alone getting my stuff together before I leave. 19 KB JPG >Putting on a heavy jacket since I walk to work and it's dark and snowing outside. >There are about 3 or 4 other people closing up with me, so I'm not completely alone or anything. Not really important to the story but just some context. >As I'm collecting my things there's still music playing over the speakers throughout the restaurant. >At this point I'm tired but I was used to my hours and felt completely fine and normal. >Downtown by Petula Clark starts playing. >Have never listened to this song before, but I felt a wave of uneasiness the second it started to play. >Instantly feel lightheaded and numb, I stumble backwards and almost fall down, catching myself on a shelf. >Sit on the floor and feel very weird and paranoid, have never felt this way before. It was what I imagine a panic attack would feel like, I guess. >I sit and breathe until the song stops, that's when I get myself up and I instantly start feeling better. >I have no history of fainting or anything of the sort. That wasn't the weird part though. >Like two days later. >Guy in Nashville detonates a car bomb, before exploding he was playing sounds on a speaker. >He was also playing Downtown by Petula Clark. >Probably a massive coincidence, but it's still very weird. I have never reacted that way in regard to anything before or since. >Also, we were a "sportsy" bar place, why did we have some old ass slow 60s song playing? I worked there for over a year and that was the first and last time I ever heard that song play. All our managers (managers were the only ones that could change the music) were in their late 20s or early 30s so it wasn't some boomer playing old music he liked. >It still confuses me to this day. Hopefully I'm not some sleeper agent that activates to Downtown by Petula Clark.

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Anon reinvents Soyjacks. | /r/Greentext

(9) Chud 58 minutes ago No.1065029 >>1065046 >>1065056 >>1065058 >>106530 1 >>1065382 Wojak spamming is made for demoralization, specially the really ugly ones, everyone knows that right? Some really get stuck on your head due to how much of an aberration they are. Ugliness is a direct attack against a person soul (Tagimron on Tipharet) I edited an average soyjak using sacred geometry to take the evil out of the image and make it pleasing, this seemed to reverse the demoralization effect that the most horrendous images had in me before. The result also looked more like a 2000s rageface than a soyjak, although I think it still could be improved. What I'm proposing is, can turning memes more aesthetically pleasing, help against the glowie demoralization?
(9) Chud 58 minutes ago No.1065029 >>1065046 >>1065056 >>1065058 >>106530 1 >>1065382 Wojak spamming is made for demoralization, specially the really ugly ones, everyone knows that right? Some really get stuck on your head due to how much of an aberration they are. Ugliness is a direct attack against a person soul (Tagimron on Tipharet) I edited an average soyjak using sacred geometry to take the evil out of the image and make it pleasing, this seemed to reverse the demoralization effect that the most horrendous images had in me before. The result also looked more like a 2000s rageface than a soyjak, although I think it still could be improved. What I'm proposing is, can turning memes more aesthetically pleasing, help against the glowie demoralization?

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anon start to believe | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)20:27:03 No.24656617 >>24649249 (OP) > Be me, 24, virgin, absolute loner, poor as f---, my reason to live is not other than my dog, my cat and my parents who lives across the ocean. > Emotional traumas: i was r---- when i was a kid, my little brother died in my hands, was basically a outcasted all the high school. > Some days ago, someone tried to assault me with a gun, a moron who thought i was a easy prey. >About to give my phone, for a moment.. and then i said: no, f--- off. >i resist me, i didn't care to die... untill that moment, i decided i wanted to f------ live, somehow i beated the s--- of this ganster wanna be, and took his gun... it was a fake gun. >in that moment, when i thou he was going to kill me, i found myself, dude, when all the adrenaline was leaving my sistem i thought: I wanna live, i wanna have friends, i wanna a future, a family, a career. I don't know if i will get it... may be not, but what the f---! i wanna die trying! Don't give up anon, you still breathing.
Anonymous 03/02/23(Thu)20:27:03 No.24656617 >>24649249 (OP) > Be me, 24, virgin, absolute loner, poor as f---, my reason to live is not other than my dog, my cat and my parents who lives across the ocean. > Emotional traumas: i was r---- when i was a kid, my little brother died in my hands, was basically a outcasted all the high school. > Some days ago, someone tried to assault me with a gun, a moron who thought i was a easy prey. >About to give my phone, for a moment.. and then i said: no, f--- off. >i resist me, i didn't care to die... untill that moment, i decided i wanted to f------ live, somehow i beated the s--- of this ganster wanna be, and took his gun... it was a fake gun. >in that moment, when i thou he was going to kill me, i found myself, dude, when all the adrenaline was leaving my sistem i thought: I wanna live, i wanna have friends, i wanna a future, a family, a career. I don't know if i will get it... may be not, but what the f---! i wanna die trying! Don't give up anon, you still breathing.

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James /B/ond | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/04/23(Sat)00:20:47 No.895309766 >Family size bucket of McDonalds Tendies, please >Oui, Monsieur. >Wait. 3 parts original recipe, 2 Extra Crispy. Add a heavy dash of the bubbling grease to the bucket. Pour 2 tubs of Cheese Dip and copious salt over and shake for several minutes. Finish with a 3 litre Mountain Dew and the entire set of Happy Meal Boys toys on the side, wrappers preopened. 69 KB JPG
: Anonymous 03/04/23(Sat)00:20:47 No.895309766 >Family size bucket of McDonalds Tendies, please >Oui, Monsieur. >Wait. 3 parts original recipe, 2 Extra Crispy. Add a heavy dash of the bubbling grease to the bucket. Pour 2 tubs of Cheese Dip and copious salt over and shake for several minutes. Finish with a 3 litre Mountain Dew and the entire set of Happy Meal Boys toys on the side, wrappers preopened. 69 KB JPG

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Anon has a Racist Grandpa | /r/Greentext

3:56 37m (3/3 15:18) · 72438349 · 1 Re - 0 Img JPG 49KB (750 × 659) · E995A8A3-0066-4651-A5EC-D21D653DDC47.jpg 1 Reply 4 98% >Be me 2 years ago >17 years old >Have a strained relationship with grandfather because he's racist >Always rants about immigrants everytime me and my dad visit him to the point where it gets annoying >One day he offers to drive me home from high school >When I get in the car, he says: >"I didn't know your school was infested with a bunch of border hoppers" >I didn't reply to that for a solid 20 seconds >Decide to break the tension >"Yeah but it's also infested with trans people. They're even worse" >Grandpa glances at me with a massive grin on his face >Pats me on the shoulder and cackles >"Hehe, I guess you and I aren't so different after all, anon" >Ffw to now, we've had a solid relationship ever since that day >He now visits me twice a month and always brings beer and pizza Thank you, racist grandpa 21m (3/3 15:35). 72438518 >>72438349 (OP) Why do you like wetbacks?
3:56 37m (3/3 15:18) · 72438349 · 1 Re - 0 Img JPG 49KB (750 × 659) · E995A8A3-0066-4651-A5EC-D21D653DDC47.jpg 1 Reply 4 98% >Be me 2 years ago >17 years old >Have a strained relationship with grandfather because he's racist >Always rants about immigrants everytime me and my dad visit him to the point where it gets annoying >One day he offers to drive me home from high school >When I get in the car, he says: >"I didn't know your school was infested with a bunch of border hoppers" >I didn't reply to that for a solid 20 seconds >Decide to break the tension >"Yeah but it's also infested with trans people. They're even worse" >Grandpa glances at me with a massive grin on his face >Pats me on the shoulder and cackles >"Hehe, I guess you and I aren't so different after all, anon" >Ffw to now, we've had a solid relationship ever since that day >He now visits me twice a month and always brings beer and pizza Thank you, racist grandpa 21m (3/3 15:35). 72438518 >>72438349 (OP) Why do you like wetbacks?

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