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Anon looks after sister | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/27/18(Thu)22:38:14 No.48382376 >took little stepsister to the roller rink for her birthday because I wanted to be nice for once >she fell and got a concussion 47 KB PNG
: Anonymous 09/27/18(Thu)22:38:14 No.48382376 >took little stepsister to the roller rink for her birthday because I wanted to be nice for once >she fell and got a concussion 47 KB PNG

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I blame 4chan this | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 761573897 9 min. ago 4chan I blame you. >be me, 17 >just got license >home alone, want McD's >Drive in my Mom's minivan >4chan has been daily browsing for me at this point >drive through >"Yeah, uhm, can I get a 10 pc of some chicken tendies?" >whatthefuckdidljustsay.exe has been executed >this m----------- says "sure anon" >oneofus.jpg >drive to window, embarrassed af >guy is 20 something, says "you seem chill" and passes me note with his twitter >dm him >now best friends.
Anonymous | 761573897 9 min. ago 4chan I blame you. >be me, 17 >just got license >home alone, want McD's >Drive in my Mom's minivan >4chan has been daily browsing for me at this point >drive through >"Yeah, uhm, can I get a 10 pc of some chicken tendies?" >whatthefuckdidljustsay.exe has been executed >this m----------- says "sure anon" >oneofus.jpg >drive to window, embarrassed af >guy is 20 something, says "you seem chill" and passes me note with his twitter >dm him >now best friends.

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anon is turning into a filthy normie | /r/Greentext

I am dating and SJW cutie and turning into a filthy normie. Anon Becomes >Be me A Normie >24 >Upset Trump lost >Go for a walk (Thursday) >Starts thinking about life >Joke about injecting hormones and 84 KB JPG becoming a degen t----- while seething. >Goes home >Thinks it's time to take my girlfriend search seriously >Opens Bumble >Swipes >Sees cute sjw 19 year old girl with gender nonsense and BLM on her profile. >kek. >Maybe trolling while I look isn't so bad. >Swipes right >Match >She messages me instantly >l pull out my 4chan normie trope by talking about star wars >l tease her >she responds my making fun of her self >Oh no. >She has a sense of humour. >Arrange to meet at the park in 2 (social distancing date) days. >Wow! >She looks nicer irl >We played frisbee at the park >We ordered some food >More Star Wars and Marvel Larp. >She shows me her cringy cosplay >l tease her >She laughs at herself >I like her a lot. >l stop believing in 4chan social dynamics >l stop believing in conspiracy theories >I like Biden >l slowly accept progressivism >what is happening to me. >l am becoming an NPC. >I like it.
I am dating and SJW cutie and turning into a filthy normie. Anon Becomes >Be me A Normie >24 >Upset Trump lost >Go for a walk (Thursday) >Starts thinking about life >Joke about injecting hormones and 84 KB JPG becoming a degen t----- while seething. >Goes home >Thinks it's time to take my girlfriend search seriously >Opens Bumble >Swipes >Sees cute sjw 19 year old girl with gender nonsense and BLM on her profile. >kek. >Maybe trolling while I look isn't so bad. >Swipes right >Match >She messages me instantly >l pull out my 4chan normie trope by talking about star wars >l tease her >she responds my making fun of her self >Oh no. >She has a sense of humour. >Arrange to meet at the park in 2 (social distancing date) days. >Wow! >She looks nicer irl >We played frisbee at the park >We ordered some food >More Star Wars and Marvel Larp. >She shows me her cringy cosplay >l tease her >She laughs at herself >I like her a lot. >l stop believing in 4chan social dynamics >l stop believing in conspiracy theories >I like Biden >l slowly accept progressivism >what is happening to me. >l am becoming an NPC. >I like it.

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Anon is back | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 09/11/18(Tue)18:08:13 No.48077412 >be me >get banned from 4chan for 3 months >wack.jpg 2 >unironically got a job >making some decent money and can pay for my own vidya >actually met a girl and eventually we get 98 KB PNG together >life is actually going pretty well >be 3 months later at work >realize that i've became a normie >decides to visit 4chan for old time sake >boss saw me scroll through some nsfw s--- >gets fired >no more money >relationship in shambles cuz no money >at least i can post on 4chan again im back robros : Anonymous 09/11/18(Tue)18:09:03 No.48077422 welcome back retard f-----
: Anonymous 09/11/18(Tue)18:08:13 No.48077412 >be me >get banned from 4chan for 3 months >wack.jpg 2 >unironically got a job >making some decent money and can pay for my own vidya >actually met a girl and eventually we get 98 KB PNG together >life is actually going pretty well >be 3 months later at work >realize that i've became a normie >decides to visit 4chan for old time sake >boss saw me scroll through some nsfw s--- >gets fired >no more money >relationship in shambles cuz no money >at least i can post on 4chan again im back robros : Anonymous 09/11/18(Tue)18:09:03 No.48077422 welcome back retard f-----

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Old but gold | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 05/25/13(Sat)00:55 No. 16442287 Replies: >16442341 >16442343 >>16442433 >>16442460 >>16442510 >listening to music >cleaning up my man cave >gf says she is going to the store >decide it's time for a fap >wait a few minutes after she left >strip naked because that's how I do >searching for that perfect fap video >getting close hear the door open and shut >shut my computer down but keep fapping hoping gf will come down and finish me off >decide I am going to surprise her and j--- the second she walks in (seemed better at the time) >hear someone walking down the stairs >decide to stand for this >as the door opens shoot my load all over some dude in a ski mask >I literally fall back stunned and reach for my gun >he is yelling w-- >hold him at gunpoint until the cops come >cop asks what is all over the guys shirt and pants >explain and give my statement >l can still hear them laughing...
Anonymous 05/25/13(Sat)00:55 No. 16442287 Replies: >16442341 >16442343 >>16442433 >>16442460 >>16442510 >listening to music >cleaning up my man cave >gf says she is going to the store >decide it's time for a fap >wait a few minutes after she left >strip naked because that's how I do >searching for that perfect fap video >getting close hear the door open and shut >shut my computer down but keep fapping hoping gf will come down and finish me off >decide I am going to surprise her and j--- the second she walks in (seemed better at the time) >hear someone walking down the stairs >decide to stand for this >as the door opens shoot my load all over some dude in a ski mask >I literally fall back stunned and reach for my gun >he is yelling w-- >hold him at gunpoint until the cops come >cop asks what is all over the guys shirt and pants >explain and give my statement >l can still hear them laughing...

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Anon experiences America | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)09:01:01 No.854951973 >>854951717 (OP) # >Be American >Give tip >Get fat >Get shot 265 KB PNG The Burger cycle.
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)09:01:01 No.854951973 >>854951717 (OP) # >Be American >Give tip >Get fat >Get shot 265 KB PNG The Burger cycle.

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Anon has technical difficulties | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)19:08:47 No.854962628 >Start using reddit >Read that you gotta post or comment to get karma Cease Your Faggotry >Get 20 karma >Write a comment >Instantly lose 16 karma >w--.jpg >Post a few things to different subreddits >Goes completely unnoticed and nobody gives a 37 KB JPG f--- >someone reposts the same greentext from 7 years ago for the 50th time >gets 30k upvotes Jesus f--- I hate reddit so much it's unbelievable
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)19:08:47 No.854962628 >Start using reddit >Read that you gotta post or comment to get karma Cease Your Faggotry >Get 20 karma >Write a comment >Instantly lose 16 karma >w--.jpg >Post a few things to different subreddits >Goes completely unnoticed and nobody gives a 37 KB JPG f--- >someone reposts the same greentext from 7 years ago for the 50th time >gets 30k upvotes Jesus f--- I hate reddit so much it's unbelievable

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Anon is too smart to get scammed | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/04/20(Wed)15:47:35 No.822020977 >Be me >Get a call from unknown number >Answer it >"Congatulations, you won an all expenses paid vacation!" >"F--- off scammer" *click* 15 KB JPG >Watch local news later that night >Headline: "Billionaire gives away free vacations to 5 locals" >mfw 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 03/04/20(Wed)15:47:35 No.822020977 >Be me >Get a call from unknown number >Answer it >"Congatulations, you won an all expenses paid vacation!" >"F--- off scammer" *click* 15 KB JPG >Watch local news later that night >Headline: "Billionaire gives away free vacations to 5 locals" >mfw 3 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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No title necessary | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/12/19(Fri) 15:18:33 No.804456869 >be me >yesterday >doing race to see if I could beat a record >some of the "runners" are in wheelchairs and only have to do 5 laps instead of 10 since it takes 2 KB JPG them so much longer >while running one of the wheely bois falls out of his chair and onto my path >two other runners stop to help him up and I didn't know weather to stop or keep running >in the end I kept running and jumped over his wheelchair and in a calm voice said "my condolences" >got a few boos but the guy in the wheelchair laughed >mfw I got 2nd
: Anonymous 07/12/19(Fri) 15:18:33 No.804456869 >be me >yesterday >doing race to see if I could beat a record >some of the "runners" are in wheelchairs and only have to do 5 laps instead of 10 since it takes 2 KB JPG them so much longer >while running one of the wheely bois falls out of his chair and onto my path >two other runners stop to help him up and I didn't know weather to stop or keep running >in the end I kept running and jumped over his wheelchair and in a calm voice said "my condolences" >got a few boos but the guy in the wheelchair laughed >mfw I got 2nd

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Anon meets an old man | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/05/18(Fri)16:06:20 No.42291881 >Be me >Some old guy knocks on my door >He tells me that this house used to be his childhood home >Tells me that they had a kind of family tradition that each kid would have to do before moving out >Said it involved doing a blessing in the basement >He had a falling out with them and moved out without doing the blessing and says that he regrets 34 KB JPG it >Tells me that he would need about an hour alone in the basement >I really don't want to let him in my basement >Let him do it anyways >He thanks me and goes downstairs >l'm just watching the clock until he comes back upstairs >He thanks me, gives me 20 twenty bucks, and leaves >As soon as he leaves, I check the basement >lt smells of weed >Someone took a s--- on the floor
: Anonymous 01/05/18(Fri)16:06:20 No.42291881 >Be me >Some old guy knocks on my door >He tells me that this house used to be his childhood home >Tells me that they had a kind of family tradition that each kid would have to do before moving out >Said it involved doing a blessing in the basement >He had a falling out with them and moved out without doing the blessing and says that he regrets 34 KB JPG it >Tells me that he would need about an hour alone in the basement >I really don't want to let him in my basement >Let him do it anyways >He thanks me and goes downstairs >l'm just watching the clock until he comes back upstairs >He thanks me, gives me 20 twenty bucks, and leaves >As soon as he leaves, I check the basement >lt smells of weed >Someone took a s--- on the floor

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Anon’s parents think he is gay | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: 8KpsHkbi ) E 05/21/21(Fri)19:43:58 No.12793011 >parents lately heavily hinting they think I'm in the closet because I never bring home girls >can't tell them I hooked up 51 KB JPG with the Indian chick who works for us as a maid >I clean our apartment every morning after they left and before she arrives >we usually watch s----- sitcoms, get wasted then bang >they pay her £6.50/hour twice a week
: Anonymous (ID: 8KpsHkbi ) E 05/21/21(Fri)19:43:58 No.12793011 >parents lately heavily hinting they think I'm in the closet because I never bring home girls >can't tell them I hooked up 51 KB JPG with the Indian chick who works for us as a maid >I clean our apartment every morning after they left and before she arrives >we usually watch s----- sitcoms, get wasted then bang >they pay her £6.50/hour twice a week

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Anon sees a friend | /r/Greentext

>born >go blind at 6 >get special glasses to restore vision >put them on >go to friends house >say long time no see 406 KB JPG
>born >go blind at 6 >get special glasses to restore vision >put them on >go to friends house >say long time no see 406 KB JPG

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Anon Makes food | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 07/09/19(Tue)21:16:15 No.804264433 >be me >live with roommates >decide l'm tired of being a fat p------------ and start going to the gym >buy a s--- ton of healthier food >start doing meal prep for the 16 KB JPG entire week >have a lot of s--- cooking at once >roommate walks in with one of her friends >"wow anon there's a lot of smoke in here" >turn on the fans and continue cooking >a few minutes later she comes back in >"anon w-- you're gonna set off the smoke alarms" >whyamialwaysafuckingbother.jpg >she starts opening the windows >her friend comes in the kitchen and starts watching me cook for a few seconds >smiles at me and says "well anon I think everything looks and smells amazing" >instantsmile.png >honestly the highlight of my day It's the little things anons
: Anonymous 07/09/19(Tue)21:16:15 No.804264433 >be me >live with roommates >decide l'm tired of being a fat p------------ and start going to the gym >buy a s--- ton of healthier food >start doing meal prep for the 16 KB JPG entire week >have a lot of s--- cooking at once >roommate walks in with one of her friends >"wow anon there's a lot of smoke in here" >turn on the fans and continue cooking >a few minutes later she comes back in >"anon w-- you're gonna set off the smoke alarms" >whyamialwaysafuckingbother.jpg >she starts opening the windows >her friend comes in the kitchen and starts watching me cook for a few seconds >smiles at me and says "well anon I think everything looks and smells amazing" >instantsmile.png >honestly the highlight of my day It's the little things anons

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Anon plays a game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)11:07:21 No.556430964 >Boring open world where the only points of interest are just enemy THE PHANTOM PAIN bases >bunch of pointless collectibles that give almost nothing to the player >less level interaction compared to other games KONAMI 289 KB JPG >contains a character designed to appeal to Coomers Yeah,i don't really like Genshin Impact Pic unrelated.
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)11:07:21 No.556430964 >Boring open world where the only points of interest are just enemy THE PHANTOM PAIN bases >bunch of pointless collectibles that give almost nothing to the player >less level interaction compared to other games KONAMI 289 KB JPG >contains a character designed to appeal to Coomers Yeah,i don't really like Genshin Impact Pic unrelated.

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Anon is a sinner | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)19:17:55 No.854959526 >be me 2 years ago >muslim in a non-muslim country >eat haribo daily >decide to read the ingridients >it contains gelatin which is made from pigs >mfw I am going to burn in hell 3 KB JPG
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)19:17:55 No.854959526 >be me 2 years ago >muslim in a non-muslim country >eat haribo daily >decide to read the ingridients >it contains gelatin which is made from pigs >mfw I am going to burn in hell 3 KB JPG

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Anon is inclusive | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/05/21(Fri)10:12:12 No.543170328 >>543168960 (OP) # >be villain >designing labyrinth to house my treasure/secret weapon >fill it with traps and hire mercenaries to guard it >install wheelchair ramps next to staircases because I want to make it accessible for disabled 38 KB JPG adventurers
: Anonymous 02/05/21(Fri)10:12:12 No.543170328 >>543168960 (OP) # >be villain >designing labyrinth to house my treasure/secret weapon >fill it with traps and hire mercenaries to guard it >install wheelchair ramps next to staircases because I want to make it accessible for disabled 38 KB JPG adventurers

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Anon swallows the ultimate redpill | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/11/21(Sun)09:41:11 No.63159C > 10 years later > Chad owns a house and a car > has a family and decent job Meanwhile I am single rent cuck with no drivers licence 87 KB JPG 'Bullies will work for you' was a lie
Anonymous 04/11/21(Sun)09:41:11 No.63159C > 10 years later > Chad owns a house and a car > has a family and decent job Meanwhile I am single rent cuck with no drivers licence 87 KB JPG 'Bullies will work for you' was a lie

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Anon is a retard | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)07:07:21 No.63769803 >be me >watch 20 mins of motivational videos on youtube >finally decide to go outside >see a cute lady >start sweating >i can't stop looking at her >she notices 17 KB PNG >she looks back a few times >not knowing what to say i just get closer >"maybe if i kiss her she'll be my gf" >she doesn't seem to get the idea and moves baclk a little >i feel ashamed and hurt >decide to just walk away while breathing heavily I don't get it, bros. Why are women like this? : Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)08:18:17 No.63770626 Why the f--- are you like this retard?!
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)07:07:21 No.63769803 >be me >watch 20 mins of motivational videos on youtube >finally decide to go outside >see a cute lady >start sweating >i can't stop looking at her >she notices 17 KB PNG >she looks back a few times >not knowing what to say i just get closer >"maybe if i kiss her she'll be my gf" >she doesn't seem to get the idea and moves baclk a little >i feel ashamed and hurt >decide to just walk away while breathing heavily I don't get it, bros. Why are women like this? : Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)08:18:17 No.63770626 Why the f--- are you like this retard?!

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anon lives with his dad | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)17:01:34 No.854955230 > Try to make post > IP banned for child p--- > W-- I've never posted child p--- > Still living with my dad atm > Mfw I realize What do /b/ros? 211 KB PNG 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread
: Anonymous 05/21/21(Fri)17:01:34 No.854955230 > Try to make post > IP banned for child p--- > W-- I've never posted child p--- > Still living with my dad atm > Mfw I realize What do /b/ros? 211 KB PNG 11 Replies / 1 Image View Thread

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Anon's sleep schedule is beyond repair | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/26/21(Mon)17:37:05 No.63394899 >alarm set for 2 hours and 11 CC minutes from now 324 KB PNG
: Anonymous 04/26/21(Mon)17:37:05 No.63394899 >alarm set for 2 hours and 11 CC minutes from now 324 KB PNG

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