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Anons are classic retards | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)11:06:12 No.552446992 >that kid who made a presentation on his favorite video games at school 147 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/19/21 (Mon)11:09:47 No.552447294 Nothing compared to the My Little Pony presentation I made when I was a brony. I still cringe thinking about it. 8 KB JPG >>552447362 # >>552447545 # >>552447680 # >>552448063 # >>552448401 # : Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)11:12:55 No.552447532 >that kid who made a presentation on his favorite p--- stars at school 514 KB PNG >>552447680 # >>552447784 # >>552448448 #
: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)11:06:12 No.552446992 >that kid who made a presentation on his favorite video games at school 147 KB JPG : Anonymous 04/19/21 (Mon)11:09:47 No.552447294 Nothing compared to the My Little Pony presentation I made when I was a brony. I still cringe thinking about it. 8 KB JPG >>552447362 # >>552447545 # >>552447680 # >>552448063 # >>552448401 # : Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)11:12:55 No.552447532 >that kid who made a presentation on his favorite p--- stars at school 514 KB PNG >>552447680 # >>552447784 # >>552448448 #

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Anon likes moles | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 12/11/18(Tue)14:22:11 No.20341809 >be me >sit in class >remember one time in kindergarten when a girl took a s--- on a bench and got in problems for doing so >find that memory really f------ 13 KB JPG funny >burst out laughing >teacher gets p----- >asks what so funny >silence. Jpg >say that I thought about a mole >teacher looks at me like l'm retarded >mfw when I actually begin thinking about moles now >remember moles are blind and probably bump into each other all the time >begin laughing again >get detention
: Anonymous 12/11/18(Tue)14:22:11 No.20341809 >be me >sit in class >remember one time in kindergarten when a girl took a s--- on a bench and got in problems for doing so >find that memory really f------ 13 KB JPG funny >burst out laughing >teacher gets p----- >asks what so funny >silence. Jpg >say that I thought about a mole >teacher looks at me like l'm retarded >mfw when I actually begin thinking about moles now >remember moles are blind and probably bump into each other all the time >begin laughing again >get detention

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How'dya like them apples | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:43:50 No.852379425 >>852379547 >>852380157 >be eating an apple >gf is watching me >saying i look sexy when i chew >she grabs apple away from me >puts it in her panties >pushes with her hand >she gasps and smiles at me >tells me to eat it out of her >me w-- >pull her panties down >looks like a dirty wet tennis ball inside a baseball glove >she is wriggling closer to my face >come on eat it >be a good boy and eat your vegetables >me turn 360 degrees and walk out the room what the hell is wrong with girls these days, an apple is a fruit not a hecking vegetable Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:47:55 No.852379602 >852380417 P----! The least you could is finish your apple. It's still food. Don't waste it Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:59:32 No.852380157 >>852380509 >>852379425 (OP) implying turning 360 degrees means you are now facing the opposite direction. retard. Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)17:06:11 No.852380509 >>852380157 >not moonwalking away from your gf during sex
Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:43:50 No.852379425 >>852379547 >>852380157 >be eating an apple >gf is watching me >saying i look sexy when i chew >she grabs apple away from me >puts it in her panties >pushes with her hand >she gasps and smiles at me >tells me to eat it out of her >me w-- >pull her panties down >looks like a dirty wet tennis ball inside a baseball glove >she is wriggling closer to my face >come on eat it >be a good boy and eat your vegetables >me turn 360 degrees and walk out the room what the hell is wrong with girls these days, an apple is a fruit not a hecking vegetable Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:47:55 No.852379602 >852380417 P----! The least you could is finish your apple. It's still food. Don't waste it Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)16:59:32 No.852380157 >>852380509 >>852379425 (OP) implying turning 360 degrees means you are now facing the opposite direction. retard. Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)17:06:11 No.852380509 >>852380157 >not moonwalking away from your gf during sex

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Anon is not racist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Juh9Aaak 04/15/20(Wed)10:14:35 No.253534494 >notice that I have a strong dislike for most minorities >worry that I may be racist >decide to test if I really am >go out for a couple of drinks with a friend of a colleague >he's black 22 KB PNG >pretty good guy actually >turns out I just hate poor people phew good thing I'm not racist
: Anonymous (ID: Juh9Aaak 04/15/20(Wed)10:14:35 No.253534494 >notice that I have a strong dislike for most minorities >worry that I may be racist >decide to test if I really am >go out for a couple of drinks with a friend of a colleague >he's black 22 KB PNG >pretty good guy actually >turns out I just hate poor people phew good thing I'm not racist

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Anon is a night owl | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous why 04/19/21(Mon)07:37:47 No.63281977 why is it that i'm way more productive i am at nighttime during daytime? >be me >1 hour until midnight hits >still awake at this hour 53 KB JPG >decide to dust my room floor and fix my laundry pile >takes a good 15 minutes >decide to do more and sort out all of my drawers >took a good 30 minutes and now my room looks marginally better >realize it's 1 am >still have strong urge to do more s--- anyone else feel like that?
: Anonymous why 04/19/21(Mon)07:37:47 No.63281977 why is it that i'm way more productive i am at nighttime during daytime? >be me >1 hour until midnight hits >still awake at this hour 53 KB JPG >decide to dust my room floor and fix my laundry pile >takes a good 15 minutes >decide to do more and sort out all of my drawers >took a good 30 minutes and now my room looks marginally better >realize it's 1 am >still have strong urge to do more s--- anyone else feel like that?

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OP is autistic | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 10/27/16(Thu)07:10:15 No.32360229 File: 223211b5a1.png (440 KB, 632x604) >>32360378 >>32360816 Not really cringe, but I have a story from a friend about missing social cues. >Walking around town late at night >Reach a guy sitting on the sidewalk, he asks me for money >"Sorry man, I don't have any money." >"I have a knife." >"Nah, that's okay man, I don't need a knife" >Walk away, don't realize I was getting robbed until later that night
Anonymous 10/27/16(Thu)07:10:15 No.32360229 File: 223211b5a1.png (440 KB, 632x604) >>32360378 >>32360816 Not really cringe, but I have a story from a friend about missing social cues. >Walking around town late at night >Reach a guy sitting on the sidewalk, he asks me for money >"Sorry man, I don't have any money." >"I have a knife." >"Nah, that's okay man, I don't need a knife" >Walk away, don't realize I was getting robbed until later that night

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Modern men | /r/Greentext

>>143333161 (OP) # Why did all young men in the olden times look like chads compared to most young men today? 239 KB JPG >>143334948 # >>143334952 # >>143335714 # >>143336967 # >>143338268 # >>143338457 # : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:20:29 No.143334948 : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:20:46 No.143334952 : Anonymous E 04/18/21(Sun)05:55:55 No.143335714 >>143336818 # : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:57:30 No.143335752 : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)06:48:10 No.143336818 >>143338501 # : Anonymous [] 04/18/21(Sun)06:55:38 No.143336967 >>143334900 # Real men from real times back then. >wake up in feather bed at 6 am >get on plow, work field til noontime >10/10 farm wife brings you hot soup and milk fresh from the cows udder >eat then have sex with her right there on the grass >hear a siren for an air raid >enlist the next day >spend the next two weeks running cardio drills and practicing shooting before shipping out Compared to: >wake up at noon, c-- crust on hand from last night >brush nachos off chest >stumble to bathroom with fresh water instant for you >go on phone all day, look at tinder and p--- >call in for a pizza when hungry >hear a dog barking and report it to the police for invading your safe space going on still, go on reddit to pad gay points wallet by posting some anti-war utopian s--- >see war in
>>143333161 (OP) # Why did all young men in the olden times look like chads compared to most young men today? 239 KB JPG >>143334948 # >>143334952 # >>143335714 # >>143336967 # >>143338268 # >>143338457 # : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:20:29 No.143334948 : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:20:46 No.143334952 : Anonymous E 04/18/21(Sun)05:55:55 No.143335714 >>143336818 # : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)05:57:30 No.143335752 : Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)06:48:10 No.143336818 >>143338501 # : Anonymous [] 04/18/21(Sun)06:55:38 No.143336967 >>143334900 # Real men from real times back then. >wake up in feather bed at 6 am >get on plow, work field til noontime >10/10 farm wife brings you hot soup and milk fresh from the cows udder >eat then have sex with her right there on the grass >hear a siren for an air raid >enlist the next day >spend the next two weeks running cardio drills and practicing shooting before shipping out Compared to: >wake up at noon, c-- crust on hand from last night >brush nachos off chest >stumble to bathroom with fresh water instant for you >go on phone all day, look at tinder and p--- >call in for a pizza when hungry >hear a dog barking and report it to the police for invading your safe space going on still, go on reddit to pad gay points wallet by posting some anti-war utopian s--- >see war in

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Anon gets a pet | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 01/14/21(Thu)20:17:41 No.844861756 >be me >extremely constipated >tried everything >in huge amount of pain and desperate for relief >have 'great idea' >go to petco and get a gerbil 5 KB JPG >brief him on his mission >operation declog is a go >send the little fella into the cavernous deeps >godspeednibbles.bmp >a couple hours go by and i dont feel him >getting worried >mfw currently at petco to get a rescue gerbil Hold on nibbles help is on the way
: Anonymous 01/14/21(Thu)20:17:41 No.844861756 >be me >extremely constipated >tried everything >in huge amount of pain and desperate for relief >have 'great idea' >go to petco and get a gerbil 5 KB JPG >brief him on his mission >operation declog is a go >send the little fella into the cavernous deeps >godspeednibbles.bmp >a couple hours go by and i dont feel him >getting worried >mfw currently at petco to get a rescue gerbil Hold on nibbles help is on the way

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It's evolving, just backwards | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)06:19:52 No.63278858 >fight with my mother >feel an urge to crossdress Explain. 155 KB JPG 28 Replies / 4 Images View Thread : Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)10:20:15 No.63281573 >>63278858 (OP) # You subconsciously want to show her who is the boss woman in the house. >>63281700 #
: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)06:19:52 No.63278858 >fight with my mother >feel an urge to crossdress Explain. 155 KB JPG 28 Replies / 4 Images View Thread : Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)10:20:15 No.63281573 >>63278858 (OP) # You subconsciously want to show her who is the boss woman in the house. >>63281700 #

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Anon admits to him mom | /r/Greentext

Anonymous| 40247746 1 hr ago ••• >be me >mother asks me every year why I still have no gf >decide to become complete honest with her >have long talk about how l'm only into little girls and not interested in adult 213.5 kB JPG women >she doesn't understand >she freaks out What do? 7 REPLIES 4 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 40247772 1 hr ago •• >>40247746 (OP) What exactly happened? How did she freak out?? Anonymous | 40247782 1 hr ago •.• >>40247746 (OP) >telling anyone, let alone your mom, that you are in to little girls my f------ sides don't even exist anymore Anonymous | 40247799 1 hr ago ••• >>40247746 (OP) >telling your mother that you're a p--------. hmmmmm how did you think that would go and how does someone not understand about being a p---
Anonymous| 40247746 1 hr ago ••• >be me >mother asks me every year why I still have no gf >decide to become complete honest with her >have long talk about how l'm only into little girls and not interested in adult 213.5 kB JPG women >she doesn't understand >she freaks out What do? 7 REPLIES 4 IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 40247772 1 hr ago •• >>40247746 (OP) What exactly happened? How did she freak out?? Anonymous | 40247782 1 hr ago •.• >>40247746 (OP) >telling anyone, let alone your mom, that you are in to little girls my f------ sides don't even exist anymore Anonymous | 40247799 1 hr ago ••• >>40247746 (OP) >telling your mother that you're a p--------. hmmmmm how did you think that would go and how does someone not understand about being a p---

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Anon doesn't like r/greentext | /r/Greentext

File: 345350698bde3a455a509735e.).jpg (10 KB, 227x220) O Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)22:39:22 No.63280798 >be me >post greentext about scaring alphas in the bathroom >barely get any replies >sad.png >browse rigreentext to see what makes a successful greentext >top post is my greentext >30,000 upvotes, 50 awards in one day >this redditor spends all his time sceenshotting /r9k/ greentexts and posting them on reddit >he never creates original works, only enjoys those of others >mfw creativity among the masses is dead >mfw people would rather consume than produce >mfw thus the decline and fall of america >mfw this greentext shows up on reddit and gets upvoted, despite insulting redditfags f--- reddit and f--- u/Suessiboy1220
File: 345350698bde3a455a509735e.).jpg (10 KB, 227x220) O Anonymous 04/18/21(Sun)22:39:22 No.63280798 >be me >post greentext about scaring alphas in the bathroom >barely get any replies >sad.png >browse rigreentext to see what makes a successful greentext >top post is my greentext >30,000 upvotes, 50 awards in one day >this redditor spends all his time sceenshotting /r9k/ greentexts and posting them on reddit >he never creates original works, only enjoys those of others >mfw creativity among the masses is dead >mfw people would rather consume than produce >mfw thus the decline and fall of america >mfw this greentext shows up on reddit and gets upvoted, despite insulting redditfags f--- reddit and f--- u/Suessiboy1220

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Anon is angry | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)01:30:34 No.852427346 >be school in Florida >worried trans kids will make sports unfair >mandate "genital inspection of minors" >literally enable sexual 22 KB JPG abuse of children
: Anonymous 04/19/21(Mon)01:30:34 No.852427346 >be school in Florida >worried trans kids will make sports unfair >mandate "genital inspection of minors" >literally enable sexual 22 KB JPG abuse of children

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Anon didn't have a dollar | /r/Greentext

Ig/ Anonymous2010-06-26 18:01:14N0.11538596 >Bitcoin Market >220 Coins = 1 USD >Can take days to get a single coin F--- that s---.
Ig/ Anonymous2010-06-26 18:01:14N0.11538596 >Bitcoin Market >220 Coins = 1 USD >Can take days to get a single coin F--- that s---.

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I fell into the same trap as anon, not as bad though | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 05/31/19(Fri)16:18:27 No.115901522 Kangaroo Jack is probably the biggest lie I was ever told >me and brother were f------ HYPED by this movie after seeing trailer >we really, really believed it would be 9 KB PNG about a rapping Kangaroo >we used to hop around our bedroom for several hours at a time shouting fake rap lyrics we made up >nothing offensive just Kangaroo related stuff like "You,me and daddy are gonna go see Kangaro0 Jack; And you, me and daddy are gonna laugh until our hair turns black; and you and me and daddy are gonna see that Kangaroo; and you and me and daddy but not dead mummy too' >ought f------ kangaroo costumes to go to the cinema and see it >went in, so excited and the movie plays >almost no f------ talking Kangaroo whatsoever >we get so annoyed that we star to actually believe the Kangaroo is talking when on screen and IS rapping even when its just a Kangaroo standing around >spent weeks telling each other about all the great lines and basically convinced ourselves it was rapping Kangaroo kino and every other line was an awesome Kangaroo rap, even had quotes scratched into our wooden bunk bed >got the DVD >remembered the truth >brother actually started crying as we watched >>115901661 # >>115904551 # >>115905859 # >>115905897 # >>115906666 # >>115907646 # >>115908492 # >>115909981 #
: Anonymous 05/31/19(Fri)16:18:27 No.115901522 Kangaroo Jack is probably the biggest lie I was ever told >me and brother were f------ HYPED by this movie after seeing trailer >we really, really believed it would be 9 KB PNG about a rapping Kangaroo >we used to hop around our bedroom for several hours at a time shouting fake rap lyrics we made up >nothing offensive just Kangaroo related stuff like "You,me and daddy are gonna go see Kangaro0 Jack; And you, me and daddy are gonna laugh until our hair turns black; and you and me and daddy are gonna see that Kangaroo; and you and me and daddy but not dead mummy too' >ought f------ kangaroo costumes to go to the cinema and see it >went in, so excited and the movie plays >almost no f------ talking Kangaroo whatsoever >we get so annoyed that we star to actually believe the Kangaroo is talking when on screen and IS rapping even when its just a Kangaroo standing around >spent weeks telling each other about all the great lines and basically convinced ourselves it was rapping Kangaroo kino and every other line was an awesome Kangaroo rap, even had quotes scratched into our wooden bunk bed >got the DVD >remembered the truth >brother actually started crying as we watched >>115901661 # >>115904551 # >>115905859 # >>115905897 # >>115906666 # >>115907646 # >>115908492 # >>115909981 #

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Anons mom wants to use the computer | /r/Greentext

File: pc 4 story jpg (5 KB, 253x199) Anonymous (ID: asOVXED7 ) 09/14/14(Sun)13:59:27 No.568666427 [Reply] I have a story for you >my mom comes home after work >she needs to use the computer >the internet starts messing up and she gets mad >she calls me downstairs and asks me why its being slow >i told her to restart it >windows needs to update and it takes a while >after the incident she calls my old nanny and her best friend the "computer expert" >she shows her the issues and everything is working fine >she then tries to print something and it didnt work >she gets upset and i offer help >"YOU DONT KNOoW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. YOU BROKE THIS WITH YOUR GAMESI" > i told her i got the games through steam and that was impossible >Our so called expert decides to wiegh in >"kid every time you download a game it has a virus. even on steam downloads are just links with malware" >i go upstairs because they are being retarded >they give up and say they will fix it tomorrow >i go downstairs and the printer was just out of ink and that is how i lost faith in humanity
File: pc 4 story jpg (5 KB, 253x199) Anonymous (ID: asOVXED7 ) 09/14/14(Sun)13:59:27 No.568666427 [Reply] I have a story for you >my mom comes home after work >she needs to use the computer >the internet starts messing up and she gets mad >she calls me downstairs and asks me why its being slow >i told her to restart it >windows needs to update and it takes a while >after the incident she calls my old nanny and her best friend the "computer expert" >she shows her the issues and everything is working fine >she then tries to print something and it didnt work >she gets upset and i offer help >"YOU DONT KNOoW WHAT YOU ARE DOING. YOU BROKE THIS WITH YOUR GAMESI" > i told her i got the games through steam and that was impossible >Our so called expert decides to wiegh in >"kid every time you download a game it has a virus. even on steam downloads are just links with malware" >i go upstairs because they are being retarded >they give up and say they will fix it tomorrow >i go downstairs and the printer was just out of ink and that is how i lost faith in humanity

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Anon busts a nut | /r/Greentext

1h (4/18 16:51) ·63271176 6 Re ·0 Img JPG 6KB · (225 × 225) The cringiest f------ things you've ever said to your family >be 13 yr/old dumb f--- >no clue how sex/m----------- works, too scared to find out >only thing i know is that when you reach a certain age, some white substance that isn't piss can shoot out of your d--- >no idea what sperm was or what it did, thought it was just a thing that happened >one night >dad and i talk about what growing up does to your body >gives me encouragement to not feel afraid about what happens, feel our relationship grow as a result, good s--- >l get ready to leave the room >decide to be an autistic smartass and end the convo with one last s----- joke >oh dear god, this is painful to remember >"hey dad" >"yeah?" >"If i start to pee something white, I'll let you know, ok?" >gives me a look of w-- and just goes back to what he was doing It took me years later to realize I had just invited my dad to watch me bust a nut. I still want to die.
1h (4/18 16:51) ·63271176 6 Re ·0 Img JPG 6KB · (225 × 225) The cringiest f------ things you've ever said to your family >be 13 yr/old dumb f--- >no clue how sex/m----------- works, too scared to find out >only thing i know is that when you reach a certain age, some white substance that isn't piss can shoot out of your d--- >no idea what sperm was or what it did, thought it was just a thing that happened >one night >dad and i talk about what growing up does to your body >gives me encouragement to not feel afraid about what happens, feel our relationship grow as a result, good s--- >l get ready to leave the room >decide to be an autistic smartass and end the convo with one last s----- joke >oh dear god, this is painful to remember >"hey dad" >"yeah?" >"If i start to pee something white, I'll let you know, ok?" >gives me a look of w-- and just goes back to what he was doing It took me years later to realize I had just invited my dad to watch me bust a nut. I still want to die.

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Anon is Elon | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: egPLaWtA 02/04/21(Thu)01:57:08 No.27695254 >be elon >Buy a s--- ton of dogecoin >Say that 100 dogecoin is now worth a Tesla >Dogecoin jump to at least 600 a share cuz it's now backed by a tesla >Elon sells off all dogecoin, still turns a 57 KB JPG massive profit despite giving away some cars Tell Me one reason why this wouldn't work?
: Anonymous (ID: egPLaWtA 02/04/21(Thu)01:57:08 No.27695254 >be elon >Buy a s--- ton of dogecoin >Say that 100 dogecoin is now worth a Tesla >Dogecoin jump to at least 600 a share cuz it's now backed by a tesla >Elon sells off all dogecoin, still turns a 57 KB JPG massive profit despite giving away some cars Tell Me one reason why this wouldn't work?

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anon dabbles in sex work | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous dabbling in sex work now 04/18/21(Sun)14:15:23 No.63276079 >be me >bedroom and bathroom on second floor of house >small decorative window in bathroom and shower >pretty small but you can still see in >s----- design 37 KB JPG >ffw a few weeks ago >get out of shower >me with anxiety always looks out window >old man neighbor looking up >i dont have towel on but put it on fast hoping he doesnt see anything >ffw a few hours >old man knocks on door places something on welcome mat then speeds away >i open door to see 500 bucks on porch >w-- >weirded out >next day same thing happens >start doing it intentional now >mfw i make 500 bucks a day by showering in my own house >mfw when im now a sex worker
: Anonymous dabbling in sex work now 04/18/21(Sun)14:15:23 No.63276079 >be me >bedroom and bathroom on second floor of house >small decorative window in bathroom and shower >pretty small but you can still see in >s----- design 37 KB JPG >ffw a few weeks ago >get out of shower >me with anxiety always looks out window >old man neighbor looking up >i dont have towel on but put it on fast hoping he doesnt see anything >ffw a few hours >old man knocks on door places something on welcome mat then speeds away >i open door to see 500 bucks on porch >w-- >weirded out >next day same thing happens >start doing it intentional now >mfw i make 500 bucks a day by showering in my own house >mfw when im now a sex worker

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dead anon tells a story. | /r/Greentext

File: 1342889711888.jpg (41 KB, 447x425) Anonymous (ID: 62GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat)13:24:46 No.546835062 >>546835350 >>546835545 >>546835658 >>546835802 >>546835957 >>546835989 >>546836321 >>546836827 >>546837392 >>546838392 ITT Deaf people problems >I learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet. PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >l have no clue what's going on >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that F--- I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me I excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again Anonymous (ID: JW6J5EFE) 05/17/14(Sat)13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374525874783.jpg (47 KB, 321x374) >>546835062 (OP) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat)13:28:33 No.546835464 >546836217 >>546836321 File: I stole this laptop.jpg (85 KB, 425x282)
File: 1342889711888.jpg (41 KB, 447x425) Anonymous (ID: 62GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat)13:24:46 No.546835062 >>546835350 >>546835545 >>546835658 >>546835802 >>546835957 >>546835989 >>546836321 >>546836827 >>546837392 >>546838392 ITT Deaf people problems >I learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet. PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >l have no clue what's going on >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that F--- I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me I excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again Anonymous (ID: JW6J5EFE) 05/17/14(Sat)13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374525874783.jpg (47 KB, 321x374) >>546835062 (OP) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat)13:28:33 No.546835464 >546836217 >>546836321 File: I stole this laptop.jpg (85 KB, 425x282)

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Anon is into traps | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/09/21(Tue)17:00:19 No.846977777 > be me, closeted bisexual > mostly into grils, but have a thing for traps > decide to find a trap irl > go on Grindr, swipe left until I find a cute femboy > we start talking and sharing nudes, body is surprisingly feminine for a trap 356 KB JPG > he wants to meet up > itsHappening.exe > show up, hes shorter than me and petite, just how I like em > get up to bedroom and start making out > he stops, "Anon, I have to tell you something" > "It's cool, I know you have a d---" > "Actually Anon, I'm ftm. I dont have a d---" > mfw, it's actually a chick > mfw, I got reversed traped
: Anonymous 02/09/21(Tue)17:00:19 No.846977777 > be me, closeted bisexual > mostly into grils, but have a thing for traps > decide to find a trap irl > go on Grindr, swipe left until I find a cute femboy > we start talking and sharing nudes, body is surprisingly feminine for a trap 356 KB JPG > he wants to meet up > itsHappening.exe > show up, hes shorter than me and petite, just how I like em > get up to bedroom and start making out > he stops, "Anon, I have to tell you something" > "It's cool, I know you have a d---" > "Actually Anon, I'm ftm. I dont have a d---" > mfw, it's actually a chick > mfw, I got reversed traped

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