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Tastes Like Dog Food Smells... DELICIOUS

: Anonymous 12/29/16 (Thu)00:58:27 No.716868649 >>716868649 (OP) # >My c-- smells exactly like our dog's food Short story/b be me >fapping c-- on a tissue >put it in trash My c-- smells exactly like our What the f--- man 73 KB JPG dog's food >went to bathroom came back to my room >mfw the f------ dog was chewing the tissue i just put in the trash >mfw i let the dog eat the whole tissue >dog got diarrhea the next day 81 KB JPG >>71 6872936 # :Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:28:41 No.716872118 mother has no idea Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:05:38 No.716869442 649 (OP)# >>716869946 # L my c-- smells exactly like our dog's food 12 KB JPG OP what is wrong with you? Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:07:05 No.716869585 TAST ES 1.58 MB GIF >>71 6868649 (OP) # why the f--- does your c-- smell like dog food and cause diarrhea? t Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:10:1N716869946 may the lord have mercy on your sou S> Idk why it smells and also tastes like it And diarrhea because he ate the tissue too Anonymous12/29/16(Thu)01:21:14 No.716871240 >>716869946# >Idk why it smells and also tastes like it and also tastes like it >Tastes like it 6 KB JPG tastes like it 81 KB JPG >>716872936 #
: Anonymous 12/29/16 (Thu)00:58:27 No.716868649 >>716868649 (OP) # >My c-- smells exactly like our dog's food Short story/b be me >fapping c-- on a tissue >put it in trash My c-- smells exactly like our What the f--- man 73 KB JPG dog's food >went to bathroom came back to my room >mfw the f------ dog was chewing the tissue i just put in the trash >mfw i let the dog eat the whole tissue >dog got diarrhea the next day 81 KB JPG >>71 6872936 # :Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:28:41 No.716872118 mother has no idea Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:05:38 No.716869442 649 (OP)# >>716869946 # L my c-- smells exactly like our dog's food 12 KB JPG OP what is wrong with you? Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:07:05 No.716869585 TAST ES 1.58 MB GIF >>71 6868649 (OP) # why the f--- does your c-- smell like dog food and cause diarrhea? t Anonymous 12/29/16(Thu)01:10:1N716869946 may the lord have mercy on your sou S> Idk why it smells and also tastes like it And diarrhea because he ate the tissue too Anonymous12/29/16(Thu)01:21:14 No.716871240 >>716869946# >Idk why it smells and also tastes like it and also tastes like it >Tastes like it 6 KB JPG tastes like it 81 KB JPG >>716872936 #

Greentext Stories
dog food barf

Subbeta

「Anonymous 08/09/13(Fri)21:29 No.4704327 Replies: >>4704330224705680 File: 1376098 142891 jpg-(30 KB, 400x300, Subway_Footlong_Oven_Roas(. .).jpg) GD >be at subway >walk in, stand in line, never make eye contact >girl asks what I want, I'm pretty sure she's a qt but I didn't look at her >"I want a roast beef" What kind of bread do you want"? "I already said roast beef." Trying to sound alpha by making my voice unnaturally low It comes out all husky and wavering, not what I hoped for sshe says "ooooooook" >starts making my sandwich on white bread l really wanted wheat but too beta to say anything >Try to play it off by leaning on the counter trying to look really cool and comfortable >"hey, I just cleaned that glass!!! I'm gonna have to charge you extra now!" >looking back, she was just joking around and trying to be fun >didn't realize it at the time though >cross my arms looking at the ground angrily, start clearing my throat really hard the workers are looking at me and giggling now stry to frown and furrow my brow, they can't know my true anxiety >OK what kind of veggies would you like? I only want a few veggies, too shy to go over the whole thing though I'd rather just take off what I don't like at home Pull up my gaze and look her straight in the eyes >cross my eyes a little though so she looks blurry and I can't really tell I'm making eye contact deepest, most clint eastwood type voice I anxiously grumble "1 want EVERYTHING" at this point the whole back line is laughing at me >I turn away from them and cross my arms across my chest, gazing out the front windows >she calls over my shoulder, "Everything?" >my energy is spent, I stand there and say nothing >hands are shaking, sweating now >l feel my alpha ruse is beginning to wear thin, I quickly turn around and storm to the cash register Slam a 20 on the counter so they can hear it, then get scared and try not to look at anybody >somebody rings up my order, hands me $5 something back in change > "Oh, I can't remember did you give me a 10 or 20? "KEEP THE CHANGE I growl, but my voice cracks >Actually poor >paid $15 for a sandwich
「Anonymous 08/09/13(Fri)21:29 No.4704327 Replies: >>4704330224705680 File: 1376098 142891 jpg-(30 KB, 400x300, Subway_Footlong_Oven_Roas(. .).jpg) GD >be at subway >walk in, stand in line, never make eye contact >girl asks what I want, I'm pretty sure she's a qt but I didn't look at her >"I want a roast beef" What kind of bread do you want"? "I already said roast beef." Trying to sound alpha by making my voice unnaturally low It comes out all husky and wavering, not what I hoped for sshe says "ooooooook" >starts making my sandwich on white bread l really wanted wheat but too beta to say anything >Try to play it off by leaning on the counter trying to look really cool and comfortable >"hey, I just cleaned that glass!!! I'm gonna have to charge you extra now!" >looking back, she was just joking around and trying to be fun >didn't realize it at the time though >cross my arms looking at the ground angrily, start clearing my throat really hard the workers are looking at me and giggling now stry to frown and furrow my brow, they can't know my true anxiety >OK what kind of veggies would you like? I only want a few veggies, too shy to go over the whole thing though I'd rather just take off what I don't like at home Pull up my gaze and look her straight in the eyes >cross my eyes a little though so she looks blurry and I can't really tell I'm making eye contact deepest, most clint eastwood type voice I anxiously grumble "1 want EVERYTHING" at this point the whole back line is laughing at me >I turn away from them and cross my arms across my chest, gazing out the front windows >she calls over my shoulder, "Everything?" >my energy is spent, I stand there and say nothing >hands are shaking, sweating now >l feel my alpha ruse is beginning to wear thin, I quickly turn around and storm to the cash register Slam a 20 on the counter so they can hear it, then get scared and try not to look at anybody >somebody rings up my order, hands me $5 something back in change > "Oh, I can't remember did you give me a 10 or 20? "KEEP THE CHANGE I growl, but my voice cracks >Actually poor >paid $15 for a sandwich

Greentext Stories
subway beta

Spider-Man Director's Cut

File: uncle-ben.jpg (182 KB, 1600x1204) O Anonymous 09/08/16 Thu 21:26:39 No.741 34238 274 134347 274 135614 > 74135648 >>741 36140 >-74 136699 74137080 >"You know, Peter, with great power comes great responsibility. Rudyard Kipling called it "White Man's Burden." Myself, I just call it as I see it: the reaponsibility of the master to discipline the servant." >Ben looks directly at the camera >"The n------, the spics, the chinks...It's our responsibility to civilize them. And if we can't? Then they shall dangle from the elm tree. The Day of the Rope is near, Pete. We'll have every n----- in this country dead or in chains in 10 years, and may God have me shot in a carjacking this very night if I'm wrong. God bless the American Nazi Party." I remember watching this scene in 2002 as a boy, it felt like Uncle Ben was talking right to me. Raimi was on another level with this film. Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:30:15 No.74134347>74134583 >>74134997 >>74136200 >>74136520 2274 134238 (OP) # that never happened Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:31:43 No.74134394 Great moment in film and nice twist to the original story O Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:38:04 No.74134583 >>74134347 # he didn't see the original cut What a pleb Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:45:22 No.74134820>74134987 Why did Peter r--- the landlord's daughter? l thought he was gay
File: uncle-ben.jpg (182 KB, 1600x1204) O Anonymous 09/08/16 Thu 21:26:39 No.741 34238 274 134347 274 135614 > 74135648 >>741 36140 >-74 136699 74137080 >"You know, Peter, with great power comes great responsibility. Rudyard Kipling called it "White Man's Burden." Myself, I just call it as I see it: the reaponsibility of the master to discipline the servant." >Ben looks directly at the camera >"The n------, the spics, the chinks...It's our responsibility to civilize them. And if we can't? Then they shall dangle from the elm tree. The Day of the Rope is near, Pete. We'll have every n----- in this country dead or in chains in 10 years, and may God have me shot in a carjacking this very night if I'm wrong. God bless the American Nazi Party." I remember watching this scene in 2002 as a boy, it felt like Uncle Ben was talking right to me. Raimi was on another level with this film. Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:30:15 No.74134347>74134583 >>74134997 >>74136200 >>74136520 2274 134238 (OP) # that never happened Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:31:43 No.74134394 Great moment in film and nice twist to the original story O Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:38:04 No.74134583 >>74134347 # he didn't see the original cut What a pleb Anonymous 09/08/16(Thu)21:45:22 No.74134820>74134987 Why did Peter r--- the landlord's daughter? l thought he was gay

Greentext Stories
raimi spider man

How to Small Talk With Cashier

please help Anonymous No.37046761 29 minutes ago Please help me r9k my life is f------ over >Mother's day yesterday Go out to buy some flowers >Picked some nice ones, at the cash register, qt3.14 cashier smiles and says "Oh, I'm sure your mother will love getting these!" Mind goes blank from seeing a qt >For some retarded reason I decide to pretend my mom died (she's alive) "Actually, she died last week" >Cashier immediately freezes "Oh I'm so sorry" >She looks legitimately upset for me, it's not like she said sorry out of politeness but she actually looks flustered, probably due to the awkward situation I created >I get upset too and feed bad for making that up oh no no no she's not actually dead >Cashier goes wut >Person behind me in line goes wut Frantically try to get out of this "uh... well she'll be dead tonight haha" whatthefuckdidljustsay cashier is in shock calls the cops Mom picks me up from the station and hears what I did now she thinksI want to kill her pic related, it's me What the f--- do I do l just wanted to get my mom some f------ flowers how did it end up like this, is suicide the only way out? Should I run away and live overseas in a lifetime of hiding?
please help Anonymous No.37046761 29 minutes ago Please help me r9k my life is f------ over >Mother's day yesterday Go out to buy some flowers >Picked some nice ones, at the cash register, qt3.14 cashier smiles and says "Oh, I'm sure your mother will love getting these!" Mind goes blank from seeing a qt >For some retarded reason I decide to pretend my mom died (she's alive) "Actually, she died last week" >Cashier immediately freezes "Oh I'm so sorry" >She looks legitimately upset for me, it's not like she said sorry out of politeness but she actually looks flustered, probably due to the awkward situation I created >I get upset too and feed bad for making that up oh no no no she's not actually dead >Cashier goes wut >Person behind me in line goes wut Frantically try to get out of this "uh... well she'll be dead tonight haha" whatthefuckdidljustsay cashier is in shock calls the cops Mom picks me up from the station and hears what I did now she thinksI want to kill her pic related, it's me What the f--- do I do l just wanted to get my mom some f------ flowers how did it end up like this, is suicide the only way out? Should I run away and live overseas in a lifetime of hiding?

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cashier grocery mom kill r9k

Nuclear Caterpillar

Anonymous 05/30/ 17 (Tue)05:44:18 No. 34106460器a 3 File: tent.ipg (157 KB, 1154x1154) >Dutch Air Force basic training Training exercise in Germany >We're sleeping in some Bundeswehr dome tent thing, looks kinda like pic related Instructors throw two smokes into each tent, "GAS GAS GAS", everyone expected to run outside and perform the CBRN drill + perimeter security We do a headcount at the end of the drill One guy short Turns out one dude simly put on his gasmask and stayed in his sleeping bag >sgtmaj loses his s--- End up marching through the night in full CBRN gear as punishment Replies: 34107118 Anonymous Anonymous θ5/39/ 17 (Tue ) θ5:47:40 No.34106471 04 05/30/17 (Tue)09:24:36 No.34107118 。5 OD urns out one dude simly put on his gasmask and stayed in his sleeping bag Why don't they make CBRN resistant sleeping bags anyway? hood/pillow on the s eping bag and tight the MOPP hood and then nu erpi >>34117172, □ Anonymous θ6/01/17 (Thu ) 08:47:28 No. 34125878*゜゜275 File: QCBRN sleeping bags png (154 KB, 1126x703) Replies: >>34109652, >>34109675, >>34110275, >>34110730』 >>34111738, >>34113625, >>34114327, >>34119017, >>34122048, >>34124197, >>34124273, >>34124478, p-3412587 'LI□ Anonymous06/01/17(Thu )01:29:14 No. 34124 197*00263 File: Q (4 KB, 198x200) nuclear caterpillar I tried.. Replies: 34125987, 34125994, >34126832 Anonymous θ6/01/17(Thu)09:23:54 No. 34125987*00278 File: Q (258 KB, 488x413) TOO CHEEK >Dude tactically hopping in the foreground >Dude tactically worming in the background That casualty in the wire □ Anonymous Θ5/30/17 (Tue) 18:46:39 No.34110739*0042 Nuclear caterpillar >That f------ visual Blow out soon stalker FOR THIS BREEKI Sides have entered orbit □ AusAnon Θ6/01/17 (Thu )02:09:14 No. 34 124470 xao 270 File: 1488661104261.ipg (82 KB, 960x960) nuclear caterpillar □ Anonymous θ6/01/17(Thu )09:38:12 No.34 126032XDO 282 Worms Armagedon in real life when? Anonymous 05/30/17 (Tue) 16:17:41 No.34109675 3DO7 you cant fight from a sleeping bag Replies: >>34109911。 >>34109986, >>34110884, >>34115841 □ Anonymous θ5/30/ 17 (Tue) 16:51:07 No. 341099 11X0010 File: Q ycH4uP24x60.ipg (63 KB, 403x604) Ha ha! That is where you are wrong, comrade! Replies: 34189986 Anonymous θ5/30/ 17 (Tue) 16:58:52 No. 34109986 012 An :01:57 No.34110014 31 a1 Anonymous 05/30/ 10:25 No. 34110071 01 Repties: 34110071 34111649, 34115861, 34123765 Anonymous θ5 (Wed ) Θ9:06:45 No 86 ike rdcore feminist quote rs ng Replies: 34121669 Replies: 34118934 Anonymous 05 (Wed) 16:01:06 No.34118934 3D1 I would never shoot a guy with his d--- out ats inconsiderate Anonymous 05/30/17 (Tue)18:34:54 No.34110636 336 theres room in here for two sider myself both schooled and intimidated 3411665 3412621 Anonymous Θ5/30/ 110650 8 DO3 An oom Replies: 34110014, 34110636, 341262
Anonymous 05/30/ 17 (Tue)05:44:18 No. 34106460器a 3 File: tent.ipg (157 KB, 1154x1154) >Dutch Air Force basic training Training exercise in Germany >We're sleeping in some Bundeswehr dome tent thing, looks kinda like pic related Instructors throw two smokes into each tent, "GAS GAS GAS", everyone expected to run outside and perform the CBRN drill + perimeter security We do a headcount at the end of the drill One guy short Turns out one dude simly put on his gasmask and stayed in his sleeping bag >sgtmaj loses his s--- End up marching through the night in full CBRN gear as punishment Replies: 34107118 Anonymous Anonymous θ5/39/ 17 (Tue ) θ5:47:40 No.34106471 04 05/30/17 (Tue)09:24:36 No.34107118 。5 OD urns out one dude simly put on his gasmask and stayed in his sleeping bag Why don't they make CBRN resistant sleeping bags anyway? hood/pillow on the s eping bag and tight the MOPP hood and then nu erpi >>34117172, □ Anonymous θ6/01/17 (Thu ) 08:47:28 No. 34125878*゜゜275 File: QCBRN sleeping bags png (154 KB, 1126x703) Replies: >>34109652, >>34109675, >>34110275, >>34110730』 >>34111738, >>34113625, >>34114327, >>34119017, >>34122048, >>34124197, >>34124273, >>34124478, p-3412587 'LI□ Anonymous06/01/17(Thu )01:29:14 No. 34124 197*00263 File: Q (4 KB, 198x200) nuclear caterpillar I tried.. Replies: 34125987, 34125994, >34126832 Anonymous θ6/01/17(Thu)09:23:54 No. 34125987*00278 File: Q (258 KB, 488x413) TOO CHEEK >Dude tactically hopping in the foreground >Dude tactically worming in the background That casualty in the wire □ Anonymous Θ5/30/17 (Tue) 18:46:39 No.34110739*0042 Nuclear caterpillar >That f------ visual Blow out soon stalker FOR THIS BREEKI Sides have entered orbit □ AusAnon Θ6/01/17 (Thu )02:09:14 No. 34 124470 xao 270 File: 1488661104261.ipg (82 KB, 960x960) nuclear caterpillar □ Anonymous θ6/01/17(Thu )09:38:12 No.34 126032XDO 282 Worms Armagedon in real life when? Anonymous 05/30/17 (Tue) 16:17:41 No.34109675 3DO7 you cant fight from a sleeping bag Replies: >>34109911。 >>34109986, >>34110884, >>34115841 □ Anonymous θ5/30/ 17 (Tue) 16:51:07 No. 341099 11X0010 File: Q ycH4uP24x60.ipg (63 KB, 403x604) Ha ha! That is where you are wrong, comrade! Replies: 34189986 Anonymous θ5/30/ 17 (Tue) 16:58:52 No. 34109986 012 An :01:57 No.34110014 31 a1 Anonymous 05/30/ 10:25 No. 34110071 01 Repties: 34110071 34111649, 34115861, 34123765 Anonymous θ5 (Wed ) Θ9:06:45 No 86 ike rdcore feminist quote rs ng Replies: 34121669 Replies: 34118934 Anonymous 05 (Wed) 16:01:06 No.34118934 3D1 I would never shoot a guy with his d--- out ats inconsiderate Anonymous 05/30/17 (Tue)18:34:54 No.34110636 336 theres room in here for two sider myself both schooled and intimidated 3411665 3412621 Anonymous Θ5/30/ 110650 8 DO3 An oom Replies: 34110014, 34110636, 341262

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sleeping bag apocalypse why is there a hole nuclear caterpillar

Robot

(6 KB, 208x250) ■ Anonymous 06/10/15(Wed)22:48:57 No.621 073955 )22621074691 ITT: Times when your autism took over in class 13 in science, teacher talking about some disease that tuns muscle into bone s"the joints then lock up in a position similar to a plastic action figure. Like this." teacher bends her arms in an L position autism kicks in. raise my hand teacher calls on me l stand up and get my arms in the same position. s'then they must do an awesome robot!" start doing the robot in class teacher starts to cry >I see her cry and don't know what to do keep on doing the robot Her son died of the disease two years ago when he was five I did the robot for ten f------ minutes
(6 KB, 208x250) ■ Anonymous 06/10/15(Wed)22:48:57 No.621 073955 )22621074691 ITT: Times when your autism took over in class 13 in science, teacher talking about some disease that tuns muscle into bone s"the joints then lock up in a position similar to a plastic action figure. Like this." teacher bends her arms in an L position autism kicks in. raise my hand teacher calls on me l stand up and get my arms in the same position. s'then they must do an awesome robot!" start doing the robot in class teacher starts to cry >I see her cry and don't know what to do keep on doing the robot Her son died of the disease two years ago when he was five I did the robot for ten f------ minutes

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robot dance disease class teacher

Pikachu Onesie

girlfriend is moving out of her dorm for the summer >lobby is filled with s--- people don't want >go looking for a small fan find treasure >brand new adult Pikachu onesie pajamas, tail included scamper home with my prize >promptly cut the arms off to make it sleeveless >saturday comes >deadlift day >go in at busiest time >strut into weight room in my pikachu lifting suit and chucks everyone mirin >work up to a 405 single >"Pika CHUUUUUUUUUU ock that s--- out strut out sipping brotein shake from a pokeball goblet I had from child >alpha as f---
girlfriend is moving out of her dorm for the summer >lobby is filled with s--- people don't want >go looking for a small fan find treasure >brand new adult Pikachu onesie pajamas, tail included scamper home with my prize >promptly cut the arms off to make it sleeveless >saturday comes >deadlift day >go in at busiest time >strut into weight room in my pikachu lifting suit and chucks everyone mirin >work up to a 405 single >"Pika CHUUUUUUUUUU ock that s--- out strut out sipping brotein shake from a pokeball goblet I had from child >alpha as f---

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pikachu onesie gym workout

Responsible Dealer

Anonymous Thu Sep 20 2012 19:54:35 No.155659408 Report Quoted By: 155659490 >>155659592 155659618 155659624 155659675 15566006 0155660116 155660205*155661195 155661334 >be 8 >older sister is addicted to oxycontin >her grades went from B's to D's >family thought her classes were just really hard and gave her the benefit of a doubt >her habits get worse >she uses up all her savings from her job and small allowance buying drugs sone day she grabs me by the hand and tells me we're going on a field trip sthought older sister was back to herself even though she clearly looked like hell >she takes me to a shady as f--- place in the city >she opens the door and theres a couple black people sitting around >"I1l pay with him" sthe (what I now realize were) drug dealers stared at her in disbelief >"Don't you people do slave trafficking too or some s---? I'Il just tell my parents he was kidnapped." sthey toss her a bag and grab me by the arm safter she leaves they shake their head. Sorry about all this, kid. Here, give me your home number, 'llcal your parents to pick you up" sone guy lends me his gameboy with contra on it to play to pass the time >parents find out about her drug habit >she has the choice to check into rehab or be kicked out of the house >she goes into rehab >parents buy me pokemon blue as compensation
Anonymous Thu Sep 20 2012 19:54:35 No.155659408 Report Quoted By: 155659490 >>155659592 155659618 155659624 155659675 15566006 0155660116 155660205*155661195 155661334 >be 8 >older sister is addicted to oxycontin >her grades went from B's to D's >family thought her classes were just really hard and gave her the benefit of a doubt >her habits get worse >she uses up all her savings from her job and small allowance buying drugs sone day she grabs me by the hand and tells me we're going on a field trip sthought older sister was back to herself even though she clearly looked like hell >she takes me to a shady as f--- place in the city >she opens the door and theres a couple black people sitting around >"I1l pay with him" sthe (what I now realize were) drug dealers stared at her in disbelief >"Don't you people do slave trafficking too or some s---? I'Il just tell my parents he was kidnapped." sthey toss her a bag and grab me by the arm safter she leaves they shake their head. Sorry about all this, kid. Here, give me your home number, 'llcal your parents to pick you up" sone guy lends me his gameboy with contra on it to play to pass the time >parents find out about her drug habit >she has the choice to check into rehab or be kicked out of the house >she goes into rehab >parents buy me pokemon blue as compensation

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drug sister dealer gameboy pokemon blue contra

New York Shit

File: smugpepe.ipg (24 KB, 499x499) | Anonymous 05/09/15(Sat)12:08:17 No.18588876 Anyone got ruse plans? Here's mine >Buy new shirt >Don't let roommates know >Go on vacation to place with a landmark, like New York >Take photo in front of Statue of Liberty wearing new shirt > Go back and tell roommates vou went somewhere else >Wait a few weeks >Tell your roommates you just got a new shirt and show it to them >Say you're going on vacation to New York >Actually stay in your room >Lock door, turn lights off, be silent >Send photo of you in front of Statue of Liberty with new shirt to roommate >One night, sneak out into the bathroomm >S--- in the shower >Go back to your room and wait >Next day, roommates think it was each other >Come out and say you just got back >Normies would never expect someone to actually go to New York just to get away with s------- in the shower >Enjoy as your roommates argue with each other for s------- in the shower
File: smugpepe.ipg (24 KB, 499x499) | Anonymous 05/09/15(Sat)12:08:17 No.18588876 Anyone got ruse plans? Here's mine >Buy new shirt >Don't let roommates know >Go on vacation to place with a landmark, like New York >Take photo in front of Statue of Liberty wearing new shirt > Go back and tell roommates vou went somewhere else >Wait a few weeks >Tell your roommates you just got a new shirt and show it to them >Say you're going on vacation to New York >Actually stay in your room >Lock door, turn lights off, be silent >Send photo of you in front of Statue of Liberty with new shirt to roommate >One night, sneak out into the bathroomm >S--- in the shower >Go back to your room and wait >Next day, roommates think it was each other >Come out and say you just got back >Normies would never expect someone to actually go to New York just to get away with s------- in the shower >Enjoy as your roommates argue with each other for s------- in the shower

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new york prank

Neck Lift

Anonymous 02/24/13(Sun)16:22 No.18002961 Replies: 218003003 2>18003368 File: 1361740961304.ipg-(6 KB, 170x251, 1317624447795.jpg) OH F--- >go to gym sbegin curling in curl rack >guy walks to power rack >this guy is setting the safety pins up high not sure what is going on >sets the bar up to neck height >oh s---, is he gonna commit suicide >l'd help, but Ive got 25 more reps to curl >he loads 2 plates on each side go on. >he gets under the bar >m----------- lifts it with his neck >what the f--- >he's walking back >oh s--- n----- >he can't hold onto the weight, he's trying to sit down somewhere >OH S--- N----- I WANNA HELP BUT I GOT 12 MORE REPS >he's sitting down, and realizes there's no seat, and goes up >scream loudly "DROP THE BAR MAN" >he can't hear me through "Call Me Maybe" on his earbuds can only watch in horror as he unsuccessfully tries to sit down 6 more times >He finally gets the energy to walk forward and rerack the bar on the safety pins mfw the entire thing
Anonymous 02/24/13(Sun)16:22 No.18002961 Replies: 218003003 2>18003368 File: 1361740961304.ipg-(6 KB, 170x251, 1317624447795.jpg) OH F--- >go to gym sbegin curling in curl rack >guy walks to power rack >this guy is setting the safety pins up high not sure what is going on >sets the bar up to neck height >oh s---, is he gonna commit suicide >l'd help, but Ive got 25 more reps to curl >he loads 2 plates on each side go on. >he gets under the bar >m----------- lifts it with his neck >what the f--- >he's walking back >oh s--- n----- >he can't hold onto the weight, he's trying to sit down somewhere >OH S--- N----- I WANNA HELP BUT I GOT 12 MORE REPS >he's sitting down, and realizes there's no seat, and goes up >scream loudly "DROP THE BAR MAN" >he can't hear me through "Call Me Maybe" on his earbuds can only watch in horror as he unsuccessfully tries to sit down 6 more times >He finally gets the energy to walk forward and rerack the bar on the safety pins mfw the entire thing

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weight lift neck good form

Too Much /b

Anionvmou I f----- up, bots be me 1st year of uni Studying robotics >S--- is cash my dudes One day while receiving lecture, kid stumbles into class 42 KB JPG 10 minutes late The girl is just your average stacy. Not very important >She is clearly in a rush to get to a seat >On her way up the stairs she trips pretty hard fuckingkek.png >This bitch hit the ground like a sack of bricks I'm talking full on faceplant into the stairs >Without thinking blurt out "N----- are you f------ retarded?" >F--- Whole class turns over to me >Just sit there stonefaced Everyone is silent until class is over >Professor walks up to me once everyone leaves "N----- are you f------ retarded? Really anon?" "Y-Yes sir... How f----- am I guys? College is pretty comfy. I don't want to leave just yet.
Anionvmou I f----- up, bots be me 1st year of uni Studying robotics >S--- is cash my dudes One day while receiving lecture, kid stumbles into class 42 KB JPG 10 minutes late The girl is just your average stacy. Not very important >She is clearly in a rush to get to a seat >On her way up the stairs she trips pretty hard fuckingkek.png >This bitch hit the ground like a sack of bricks I'm talking full on faceplant into the stairs >Without thinking blurt out "N----- are you f------ retarded?" >F--- Whole class turns over to me >Just sit there stonefaced Everyone is silent until class is over >Professor walks up to me once everyone leaves "N----- are you f------ retarded? Really anon?" "Y-Yes sir... How f----- am I guys? College is pretty comfy. I don't want to leave just yet.

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/b trip school college

Highway Maze

Anonymous 03/24/15(Tue) 12:55:54 No 288 134097、222881 46287 >288120126 >Driving home from work >Decide to take the new highway that has opened See ominous mesh of concrete and steel getting closer and closer stake big gulp GPS cowers in fear calm down and just say "follow the signs" and take a slow breath get on first entrance ramp > F---" I say as I think I was supposed to take the one 1/8th of a mile further >Say f--- and try to turn onto one of the side ramps >Get stuck in a loop >GPS is crying in the corner, no help at all Keep turning onto different ramps >pretty sure one sign wants me to jump off the railing onto the ramp below >keep up pattern for 45 minutes >Get call from wife asking where I am >Tell here; purgatory Keep driving and driving till I run out of gas >Notice other people have stopped and are out of gas too >We welcome our new home in our concrete prison □ Anonymous 03/24/15(Tue)14:55:30 No.288 146287、22288 47108 22288134097 >Sixteen years pass >those born after the great influx are now old enough to take the trial to become considered adults severyone is crowded around the trial grounds in preperation for the event >a pair of stray dogs are roasting on a spit ssuddenly a spear whizzes past the head of the medicine man and embeds itself in the leg of a pregnant woman >her scream silences the festivities >it's the bastards from the southeastern triangle >they hit hard and fast, but are easily repelled due to their inferior numbers A counter-attack grows ever closer, and the entirety of this hellish place shall belong to those that deserve it >such is life on the interchange
Anonymous 03/24/15(Tue) 12:55:54 No 288 134097、222881 46287 >288120126 >Driving home from work >Decide to take the new highway that has opened See ominous mesh of concrete and steel getting closer and closer stake big gulp GPS cowers in fear calm down and just say "follow the signs" and take a slow breath get on first entrance ramp > F---" I say as I think I was supposed to take the one 1/8th of a mile further >Say f--- and try to turn onto one of the side ramps >Get stuck in a loop >GPS is crying in the corner, no help at all Keep turning onto different ramps >pretty sure one sign wants me to jump off the railing onto the ramp below >keep up pattern for 45 minutes >Get call from wife asking where I am >Tell here; purgatory Keep driving and driving till I run out of gas >Notice other people have stopped and are out of gas too >We welcome our new home in our concrete prison □ Anonymous 03/24/15(Tue)14:55:30 No.288 146287、22288 47108 22288134097 >Sixteen years pass >those born after the great influx are now old enough to take the trial to become considered adults severyone is crowded around the trial grounds in preperation for the event >a pair of stray dogs are roasting on a spit ssuddenly a spear whizzes past the head of the medicine man and embeds itself in the leg of a pregnant woman >her scream silences the festivities >it's the bastards from the southeastern triangle >they hit hard and fast, but are easily repelled due to their inferior numbers A counter-attack grows ever closer, and the entirety of this hellish place shall belong to those that deserve it >such is life on the interchange

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highway maze trapped cities skylines

Sneaky Sneaky

Anonymous 07/22/14(Tue)04:50:57 No.43142223 File: 1347506342536ipg (22 KB, 397x351) 43142233 >>43142331 >>43143492 43143519 > FBl/CIA takes away computer > Hidden somewhere on the drive is a folder structure; > hidden/dontclick/goaway/no/stop/cp > inside "cp folder is a single truecrypt container named "cp" > They demand the password, I say no > Go through lengthy legal battle where I refuse giving them password > Eventually give them the password because threats of being taken to guatanamo bay or something > cp container is filled with various videoclips named s--- like "lolita12" and "raygold_097" > Every single one of them is a rickroll video with various quality/cropping settings to produce multiple different-sized files > They either realize I've wasted millions of dollars of tax money trolling them, or go full retard and try to "decrypt" the video files to try and find CP inside that doesn't exist Come at me, USA.
Anonymous 07/22/14(Tue)04:50:57 No.43142223 File: 1347506342536ipg (22 KB, 397x351) 43142233 >>43142331 >>43143492 43143519 > FBl/CIA takes away computer > Hidden somewhere on the drive is a folder structure; > hidden/dontclick/goaway/no/stop/cp > inside "cp folder is a single truecrypt container named "cp" > They demand the password, I say no > Go through lengthy legal battle where I refuse giving them password > Eventually give them the password because threats of being taken to guatanamo bay or something > cp container is filled with various videoclips named s--- like "lolita12" and "raygold_097" > Every single one of them is a rickroll video with various quality/cropping settings to produce multiple different-sized files > They either realize I've wasted millions of dollars of tax money trolling them, or go full retard and try to "decrypt" the video files to try and find CP inside that doesn't exist Come at me, USA.

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folder trick fbi layers

Just Grab A Millipede

Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:12:28 No.3303930033039387 >3303939733039417 33039428 >330394333303941433039483 33039529 File: drfeel ipg (15 KB, 403x393) OP I know how you feel. I was homeless for 2 months when my parents kicked me out (I live in a hotel where I got a job now) I was terrible at it though >Squatting in the basement of a large family house 92 kids, mother, father, and a collection of exotic pets like Snakes, Spiders and Scorpions s Thay are rarely out of the houso at once >Makes it very difficult to live, have to steal large amounts of food at once and water as I am often in the cramped room in the back of the basement for days at a time with a small torch and eel a tablet computer which almost never had time to charge one day everyone leaves and I go to search for food shaven't eaten in 2 days look around whole kitchen is basic ally empty few apples and some canned beans not enough >walk around desperate Peventually walk past a Millipede Tank Feel desperate Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes >car pulls into the drive panic and run donstairs with the Millipedes in hand >sit in the basement eat one of them tastes bitter and disgusting. might have been poisonous start to feel sick sopen the can of beans sput the remaining Millipedes into the can feel weak start shaking the can to mix up the taste ssuddenly vomit everywhare, very loudly hear commotion upstairs >look up, door is open whole family staring at me in the dark covered in vomit with a can of beans that has Millipedes trapped inside on the floor sblindly panic and charge past them, knock the small son on the floor one my way out accidentally knock over what I think was a Tarantula enclosure horrible, I slept in the library for the remaining time and ate stolen sandwic hes Anonymous 11128/1 6(Mon)23:16:59 No.33039387 File: 14799753442 Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:19:23 No.33030428 Flle: tumair vareas57r1IVARS501 400 nna (22 KB, 304X288) O Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:10:30 No.33030433 ~ Flle: 1 ▶ □ Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon2322 56 No.33 File: 148002072493s Ina (2 KB, 100x125) ー (63 KB, 387x604) 34972804 ina (41 KB, 500x500) 33039300 e33039300 God damn n----. What the f--- 33039300 4 millipedes Jesus f------ christ what the O O Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes NO NO NO THERE WERE APPLES AND BEANS INSTEAD GIANT millipedes holy f------ christ anon please This ca't real Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:25:43 No.33039529 File: 1480358122166 ipg (86 KB, 410x412) Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:59:21 No 330401521 File: 1403993027532.ipg (34 KB, 448x545) 33039300 SERIOUSLY WHY WHY EAT F------ GIANT MILLIPEDES WHEN YOU HAVE APPLES ON HAND M8 WHAT THE S--- IS WRONG WITH YOU has apples has beans has millipedes >eats the millipedes Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes Grab about 4 Giant MillipedesARU D Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:42:44 No.33039862 -perfectly good apples and beans >grab 4 f------ millipedes Anonymous 11/29/16(Tue)00:01:21 No 33040180 File: 1455555356494 Dg162 KB·623x713) >33039300 why? why the millipedes?
Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:12:28 No.3303930033039387 >3303939733039417 33039428 >330394333303941433039483 33039529 File: drfeel ipg (15 KB, 403x393) OP I know how you feel. I was homeless for 2 months when my parents kicked me out (I live in a hotel where I got a job now) I was terrible at it though >Squatting in the basement of a large family house 92 kids, mother, father, and a collection of exotic pets like Snakes, Spiders and Scorpions s Thay are rarely out of the houso at once >Makes it very difficult to live, have to steal large amounts of food at once and water as I am often in the cramped room in the back of the basement for days at a time with a small torch and eel a tablet computer which almost never had time to charge one day everyone leaves and I go to search for food shaven't eaten in 2 days look around whole kitchen is basic ally empty few apples and some canned beans not enough >walk around desperate Peventually walk past a Millipede Tank Feel desperate Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes >car pulls into the drive panic and run donstairs with the Millipedes in hand >sit in the basement eat one of them tastes bitter and disgusting. might have been poisonous start to feel sick sopen the can of beans sput the remaining Millipedes into the can feel weak start shaking the can to mix up the taste ssuddenly vomit everywhare, very loudly hear commotion upstairs >look up, door is open whole family staring at me in the dark covered in vomit with a can of beans that has Millipedes trapped inside on the floor sblindly panic and charge past them, knock the small son on the floor one my way out accidentally knock over what I think was a Tarantula enclosure horrible, I slept in the library for the remaining time and ate stolen sandwic hes Anonymous 11128/1 6(Mon)23:16:59 No.33039387 File: 14799753442 Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:19:23 No.33030428 Flle: tumair vareas57r1IVARS501 400 nna (22 KB, 304X288) O Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:10:30 No.33030433 ~ Flle: 1 ▶ □ Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon2322 56 No.33 File: 148002072493s Ina (2 KB, 100x125) ー (63 KB, 387x604) 34972804 ina (41 KB, 500x500) 33039300 e33039300 God damn n----. What the f--- 33039300 4 millipedes Jesus f------ christ what the O O Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes NO NO NO THERE WERE APPLES AND BEANS INSTEAD GIANT millipedes holy f------ christ anon please This ca't real Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:25:43 No.33039529 File: 1480358122166 ipg (86 KB, 410x412) Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:59:21 No 330401521 File: 1403993027532.ipg (34 KB, 448x545) 33039300 SERIOUSLY WHY WHY EAT F------ GIANT MILLIPEDES WHEN YOU HAVE APPLES ON HAND M8 WHAT THE S--- IS WRONG WITH YOU has apples has beans has millipedes >eats the millipedes Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes Grab about 4 Giant Millipedes Grab about 4 Giant MillipedesARU D Anonymous 11/28/16(Mon)23:42:44 No.33039862 -perfectly good apples and beans >grab 4 f------ millipedes Anonymous 11/29/16(Tue)00:01:21 No 33040180 File: 1455555356494 Dg162 KB·623x713) >33039300 why? why the millipedes?

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G Force

□ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:1 7 No. 1 560041 54 Replies: 22156004242 >>156 File: 1348435029381.ipg-(179 KB, 640x905, gforce10.jpg) Be 16 living away at dads house >Little half sister lives there too with step mother Be grounded for having s----- grades >No vidya Little sister still has PS2 hooked up in the basement >Only game is pic related >Step mom and Dad are upstairs arguing > Sneak down and turn it on >TV is Disney Princess TV (Next pic) >Boot up PS2 >Grab controller (Fathers NFL controller from his PS2) >Start playing G-Force Game is so bad but I don't give a f--- >Hear sister coming down stairs (small feet) >Panic (cont) □ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:18 No. 156004242 Replies: >>1560043 1222156 File: 1348435080314.ipg-(17 KB, 500x375, fF6e.jpg) 156004154 >Peaks in and says >"Hey anon, how do you get past that part?" Show her with my f------ nervous charisma S"T'm gonna go grab some gushers" >Walks back upstairs >Hear arguing stop >Get to Hamster ball boss in G-Force >Health is almost gone >Boss is almost dead > So intense >Hear foot steps coming down the stairs >Haven't used the bathroom in a while >Father busts in with Gushers >Sister behind him She's smiling >He grabs my collar and yanks me up >I start feeling sick >He's yelling at me (cont) □ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:18 No. 156004312 Replies: >2156004492 221564 File: 1348435125273 jpg-(73 KB, 600x600, nfl-wsh082461 04 1.jpg) 156004242 S--- myself >S--- leaking down my leg >Gets all over fathers NFL controller >He had let my sister use it because hers broke >Hamster boss on G-force kills me >Game over Didn't save >Father beats my ass without realizing I had s--- myself >Gets s--- on hand >Backs away GO TO THE BATHROOM ANON!" Never allowed downstairs again when grounded Move back to moms shortly after F--- my sister Pic is the controller
□ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:1 7 No. 1 560041 54 Replies: 22156004242 >>156 File: 1348435029381.ipg-(179 KB, 640x905, gforce10.jpg) Be 16 living away at dads house >Little half sister lives there too with step mother Be grounded for having s----- grades >No vidya Little sister still has PS2 hooked up in the basement >Only game is pic related >Step mom and Dad are upstairs arguing > Sneak down and turn it on >TV is Disney Princess TV (Next pic) >Boot up PS2 >Grab controller (Fathers NFL controller from his PS2) >Start playing G-Force Game is so bad but I don't give a f--- >Hear sister coming down stairs (small feet) >Panic (cont) □ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:18 No. 156004242 Replies: >>1560043 1222156 File: 1348435080314.ipg-(17 KB, 500x375, fF6e.jpg) 156004154 >Peaks in and says >"Hey anon, how do you get past that part?" Show her with my f------ nervous charisma S"T'm gonna go grab some gushers" >Walks back upstairs >Hear arguing stop >Get to Hamster ball boss in G-Force >Health is almost gone >Boss is almost dead > So intense >Hear foot steps coming down the stairs >Haven't used the bathroom in a while >Father busts in with Gushers >Sister behind him She's smiling >He grabs my collar and yanks me up >I start feeling sick >He's yelling at me (cont) □ Anonymous 09/23/12(Sun)17:18 No. 156004312 Replies: >2156004492 221564 File: 1348435125273 jpg-(73 KB, 600x600, nfl-wsh082461 04 1.jpg) 156004242 S--- myself >S--- leaking down my leg >Gets all over fathers NFL controller >He had let my sister use it because hers broke >Hamster boss on G-force kills me >Game over Didn't save >Father beats my ass without realizing I had s--- myself >Gets s--- on hand >Backs away GO TO THE BATHROOM ANON!" Never allowed downstairs again when grounded Move back to moms shortly after F--- my sister Pic is the controller

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Drumpf Tweeter

IMG 2446.png (240 KB, 750x1334) Anonymous (ID: mSCIH1TL ) 08/26/17(Sat)14:50:00 Tweet 0 曰 No.139140573 >>139142654 Imagine being the guy who writes 40+ tweets every time drumpf breathes wake up about to check phone to see if drunpf posted a tweet oh my f------ god he did >he's telling the citizens of Texas to stay safe angry sweat breaks on my face >begin to call him names and bring up fake news >cry after he blocks me for harassing him -but I laugh my ass off every time I respond to his tweets >another day of saving America and bash the fash my dad walks in and tells me to get a job >punch that f------ nazi in the face for telling me to work in an evil capitalist society. >Morefashhasbeenbashed.jpg watch SNL and CNN and fall asleep >Today was a good day
IMG 2446.png (240 KB, 750x1334) Anonymous (ID: mSCIH1TL ) 08/26/17(Sat)14:50:00 Tweet 0 曰 No.139140573 >>139142654 Imagine being the guy who writes 40+ tweets every time drumpf breathes wake up about to check phone to see if drunpf posted a tweet oh my f------ god he did >he's telling the citizens of Texas to stay safe angry sweat breaks on my face >begin to call him names and bring up fake news >cry after he blocks me for harassing him -but I laugh my ass off every time I respond to his tweets >another day of saving America and bash the fash my dad walks in and tells me to get a job >punch that f------ nazi in the face for telling me to work in an evil capitalist society. >Morefashhasbeenbashed.jpg watch SNL and CNN and fall asleep >Today was a good day

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drumpf twitter tweet trump

Don

down eventually gets into the part, state comng to schood with a red rose an hia pocket and starts picking up a sican accent bone weok he insists we heid to pt on of the teaches on the ist theapis had brainwashed him into thinking that whacking people with a chair was not OK rvertually in rugs to convince hin that the thersqíst Idd him, so beta,bes he w actually afrid of hin Don Enaly eawakers, he s all jacked up and pumped because af my AMNs Ike a f------ hino through the crowd against the snich, tripping him over the stars ylang Story hori a loc al policomun passes by. ho gots1ho idoa thal the snitch bu!ying Don -Has developed a real addicion to Dragon Bails AMVs, s now convinced he is some kind of mafioso super sayan The Don has now a soc ial ife. frends and frequent power trips, courtesy of DB AMV sone downy al the aftemoon school is obviousy not ok with the Don's success we try to caln m down and aad anhr hino charge by feeding aim Mas Ba i get a special mention for being friend with him (as an emmple of tolerance, bla bla bla) oventually tho Don not ouspendod thanks to our rontenc。wo oven got th0 school's director to ignop him The Don keeps hia heart low for a few days, he mun invites me alt hs place one day ofind a bottle of pilis on the kchen's tabla sppreny they got the tueier under Xanas we get ourselves invited at the Don's place ance mone to complete the ordeal the Don has cbviously mot takon soo well his gun mois betrayal and the cther downy sanding him into therapy >As consigiee, i demand the newconer to show hs warth to be admtted nto the farly parents stil tink he is cn xanax 3◇ they are sending him to the tard school again aftemoos tard weangers arange some kind of social game for tards where they have so guess a thing ahile bidfoides -Geme goes wel for e while apparenly boh the Don and his semesis are doing just fine Arch nemesis thinks it is oviously a good idea to slap him in he back of he head wranglrs cal parents onca e, scawny kid testifss for the Don saying he was provoked n 2 months than years of useless peld tutors. His parents even got him off "Xanex tvory month wo had the List. (and or o f tholantors was consistam y rt。it rNow it was mostly about hdying (ther kids LrxH they eame 10 the ten to pay him poets by kissing his ring usually giggles and point his brown finger at the Don whenever he get out of school -by non it's basically 2 àd gypsies vs 5 kids the Lemon and now fuming Don the ofhar gypsy standing is now alone agairst the oEet 4 madk men stats screaning for ha LOCAL ROMANIAN GANG ATTACKS AND INJURIES MENTALLY HANDICAPPED KIDS 3 ARRESTS -and snce we are close to elections, the mayor sends the cops to clear the camp and kick the ovppos out a week Ister cling secuity conce -as his trasted Consigiore i make surs none of the smaler kids get to challenge the Don's hagsmony
down eventually gets into the part, state comng to schood with a red rose an hia pocket and starts picking up a sican accent bone weok he insists we heid to pt on of the teaches on the ist theapis had brainwashed him into thinking that whacking people with a chair was not OK rvertually in rugs to convince hin that the thersqíst Idd him, so beta,bes he w actually afrid of hin Don Enaly eawakers, he s all jacked up and pumped because af my AMNs Ike a f------ hino through the crowd against the snich, tripping him over the stars ylang Story hori a loc al policomun passes by. ho gots1ho idoa thal the snitch bu!ying Don -Has developed a real addicion to Dragon Bails AMVs, s now convinced he is some kind of mafioso super sayan The Don has now a soc ial ife. frends and frequent power trips, courtesy of DB AMV sone downy al the aftemoon school is obviousy not ok with the Don's success we try to caln m down and aad anhr hino charge by feeding aim Mas Ba i get a special mention for being friend with him (as an emmple of tolerance, bla bla bla) oventually tho Don not ouspendod thanks to our rontenc。wo oven got th0 school's director to ignop him The Don keeps hia heart low for a few days, he mun invites me alt hs place one day ofind a bottle of pilis on the kchen's tabla sppreny they got the tueier under Xanas we get ourselves invited at the Don's place ance mone to complete the ordeal the Don has cbviously mot takon soo well his gun mois betrayal and the cther downy sanding him into therapy >As consigiee, i demand the newconer to show hs warth to be admtted nto the farly parents stil tink he is cn xanax 3◇ they are sending him to the tard school again aftemoos tard weangers arange some kind of social game for tards where they have so guess a thing ahile bidfoides -Geme goes wel for e while apparenly boh the Don and his semesis are doing just fine Arch nemesis thinks it is oviously a good idea to slap him in he back of he head wranglrs cal parents onca e, scawny kid testifss for the Don saying he was provoked n 2 months than years of useless peld tutors. His parents even got him off "Xanex tvory month wo had the List. (and or o f tholantors was consistam y rt。it rNow it was mostly about hdying (ther kids LrxH they eame 10 the ten to pay him poets by kissing his ring usually giggles and point his brown finger at the Don whenever he get out of school -by non it's basically 2 àd gypsies vs 5 kids the Lemon and now fuming Don the ofhar gypsy standing is now alone agairst the oEet 4 madk men stats screaning for ha LOCAL ROMANIAN GANG ATTACKS AND INJURIES MENTALLY HANDICAPPED KIDS 3 ARRESTS -and snce we are close to elections, the mayor sends the cops to clear the camp and kick the ovppos out a week Ister cling secuity conce -as his trasted Consigiore i make surs none of the smaler kids get to challenge the Don's hagsmony

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don tard story

Disappearing Act

.-File: kremit.png (278 KB, 902x902) Anonymous 04/23/17(Sun)17:34:29 No.730266162 Reply] >be me decide to j------- accidentally blow load on floor, go get tissue to clean it up it's gone mfw
.-File: kremit.png (278 KB, 902x902) Anonymous 04/23/17(Sun)17:34:29 No.730266162 Reply] >be me decide to j------- accidentally blow load on floor, go get tissue to clean it up it's gone mfw

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fap disappear wat

Deaffart

File: 1342889711888.ipg (41 KB, 447x425) □ Anonymous (ID: b2GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat)13:24:46 No.546835062 ITT Deaf people problems >l learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >l have no clue what's going orn >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that F--- I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me l excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again □ Anonymous (ID: Jw6J5EFe) 05/17/14(Sat)13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374 (47 KB, 321x374) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read □ Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat)13:28:33 No. 546835464、2>54683621722546836321 File: I (85 KB, 425x282)
File: 1342889711888.ipg (41 KB, 447x425) □ Anonymous (ID: b2GUC90E) 05/17/14(Sat)13:24:46 No.546835062 ITT Deaf people problems >l learned farting makes a sound at 20 Was with gf (not my first one) >At dinner in a very nice place >Waiter asking me for my order and my a------ needs to flex >Waiter gives look of disgust and terror Itwaswet PNG >Gf signs me asking if I s--- myself >l have no clue what's going orn >my girlfriend had to explain to me with the waiter right there that F--- I just farted and that they make noise and that this particular one made everyone in the room stop talking >Mfw ive farted in front of everyone I know and nobody has ever said anything to me l excused myself to the bathroom and never talked to her again □ Anonymous (ID: Jw6J5EFe) 05/17/14(Sat)13:27:24 No.546835350 File: 1374 (47 KB, 321x374) this has got to be the greatest thing i ever read □ Anonymous (ID: qq9pYIE8) 05/17/14(Sat)13:28:33 No. 546835464、2>54683621722546836321 File: I (85 KB, 425x282)

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deaf fart restaurant date epic fail

Raw Cookie Dough

(1.52 MB, 2592x1944, IMG 20130407 165030 jpg) Anonymous (ID: 00bbGt10) 04/07/13(Sun)17:51:45 No.47 1001279 Replies: 471002008 >347 1004848 >>4710085 >see a bat of cookie dough in the fridge taste sample read on the cover saying "DO NOT EAT RAW COOKIE DOUGH' fuckthatshitjpg eat several spoonfuls of cookie dough s--- was so cash >middle of the night sleeping wake up due to a bad smell >my butt cheeks feel wet Popen covers there was liquid s--- seeping out of my a------ puddle of s--- on my bed rush to bathroom >sit on the toilet its like a volcano except for lava, its liquid s--- >could be w >liquid s--- replace by chuck s--- >stomach groans more the s--- gets harder and harder the stench was awful >my butt cheeks was slapping together so rapidly that my ass was bruised >stomach grumbles again >cant s--- in the toilet because there is not enough room s--- my f------ brains out hurts so bad i start to cry >crying while pushing out a colossal turd out of my a------ back is covered with poo falls on the floor ghost of Billy Mays's head peeps out of my a------ BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE s--- starts blasting out of a------ like two grizzley bears tearing my ass apart door is complete brown in s--- parents comes downstairs, hearing crying and moaning in the bathroom hear my dad say WHAT THE F--- IS THAT SMELL he notices s--- escaping from the bottom of the door ANON WHAT THE F--- ARE YOU DOING IN THERE" he busts down the door >he gets completely spray paint with s--- >mom vomits Never eating cookie dough again | Anonymous (ID: P600g/8D) 04/07/13(Sun)17:55:53 No.47 10020 10 Replies >>471002253 >)471002790 471004048 >want to play a trick on f----- son >spunk and put laxatives in cookie dough -thatll show the little c--- later that night >hear girly screams and loud blasts of s--- coming from downstairs >gotcha run >see s--- coming from bottom of door >blast through >sprayed with liquid s--- >son begins to cry like a girl >gently easy my rock solid penis into his freshly lubricated a------ Anonymous (ID: YodhOzeh) 04/07/13(Sun)18:04:02 No.471003621 Replies: 471094291 2471004646 471005575 >be container of raw cookie dough pexpecting to get baked into delicious cookies snobody will eat me until then, hell, it say right on my cover "DO NOT EAT RAW COOKIE DOUGH >fat f----- opens the fridge -ohhellno.png wav >decide to make the fat s--- pay for robbing me of my baked deliciousness group all the chunks up just inside his a------ >start off slow, seep out just enough to wake the n----- up >GO TIME push with all my might >fat f----- manages to make it to the toilet before I start exploding out his anus >but I ain't letting up here >slap the f------ butt cheeks together so hard his ass gets bruised >keep fill up whole toilet, f----- moves over to bathtub crying spush a massive chunk out to cause him unimaginable pain >decide to add insult to injury >vibrate his ass cheeks at just the right frequency so it sounds like Billy Mays yelling "BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE >f------ dad opens the door augh maniacally as I shoot the rest of me out as fast as I can, coating his dad and the rest of the walls in S--- >thatll teach that fat n----- to eat raw f------ cookie dough HEAR THAT, YOU FAT F---? YOU DONT F--- WITH RAW COOKIE DOUGH □ Anonymous (ID: OobbGI10) 04/07/1 3(Sun) 1 8:22:04 No.471007201 Replies >>47 1007905ー47 1 008205 >feeling quite lonely, nobody used me in a while >just chilling in the dark sall of a sudden, this fat f----- bursts into the bathroom sohno >f----- releases a Kamehameha blast of s--- in me -entire mouth is full of s--- pg riend bathtub staring at me in horror >f----- goes in the bathtub, releasing a Shadow of the Colossus turd f----- dad breaks into door, killing Mr door e gets covered in sh >feelsbadman jpg Anonymous (ID: oobbGt10) 04/07/13(Sun)18:39:01 No.471010834 >chilling with fork wife, s--- was so cash sall of a sudden, this fat f----- f--- opens the drawer and stole me >scared as f--- >jams me in Ms. Cookie Dough she felt good to be inside of >feel ashamed because I am married >kid about to jam me in his mouth >pleaseno.jpg he does it she does this several times sreturn with my wife sleeping with wife hear the fat f----- crying and moaning in the bathroom >serves that f----- right Anonymous (ID: Heaven) 04/07/13 (Sun)18:30:05 No.471008873 >be billy may's ghost >his face tells me he thinks its nearly over
(1.52 MB, 2592x1944, IMG 20130407 165030 jpg) Anonymous (ID: 00bbGt10) 04/07/13(Sun)17:51:45 No.47 1001279 Replies: 471002008 >347 1004848 >>4710085 >see a bat of cookie dough in the fridge taste sample read on the cover saying "DO NOT EAT RAW COOKIE DOUGH' fuckthatshitjpg eat several spoonfuls of cookie dough s--- was so cash >middle of the night sleeping wake up due to a bad smell >my butt cheeks feel wet Popen covers there was liquid s--- seeping out of my a------ puddle of s--- on my bed rush to bathroom >sit on the toilet its like a volcano except for lava, its liquid s--- >could be w >liquid s--- replace by chuck s--- >stomach groans more the s--- gets harder and harder the stench was awful >my butt cheeks was slapping together so rapidly that my ass was bruised >stomach grumbles again >cant s--- in the toilet because there is not enough room s--- my f------ brains out hurts so bad i start to cry >crying while pushing out a colossal turd out of my a------ back is covered with poo falls on the floor ghost of Billy Mays's head peeps out of my a------ BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE s--- starts blasting out of a------ like two grizzley bears tearing my ass apart door is complete brown in s--- parents comes downstairs, hearing crying and moaning in the bathroom hear my dad say WHAT THE F--- IS THAT SMELL he notices s--- escaping from the bottom of the door ANON WHAT THE F--- ARE YOU DOING IN THERE" he busts down the door >he gets completely spray paint with s--- >mom vomits Never eating cookie dough again | Anonymous (ID: P600g/8D) 04/07/13(Sun)17:55:53 No.47 10020 10 Replies >>471002253 >)471002790 471004048 >want to play a trick on f----- son >spunk and put laxatives in cookie dough -thatll show the little c--- later that night >hear girly screams and loud blasts of s--- coming from downstairs >gotcha run >see s--- coming from bottom of door >blast through >sprayed with liquid s--- >son begins to cry like a girl >gently easy my rock solid penis into his freshly lubricated a------ Anonymous (ID: YodhOzeh) 04/07/13(Sun)18:04:02 No.471003621 Replies: 471094291 2471004646 471005575 >be container of raw cookie dough pexpecting to get baked into delicious cookies snobody will eat me until then, hell, it say right on my cover "DO NOT EAT RAW COOKIE DOUGH >fat f----- opens the fridge -ohhellno.png wav >decide to make the fat s--- pay for robbing me of my baked deliciousness group all the chunks up just inside his a------ >start off slow, seep out just enough to wake the n----- up >GO TIME push with all my might >fat f----- manages to make it to the toilet before I start exploding out his anus >but I ain't letting up here >slap the f------ butt cheeks together so hard his ass gets bruised >keep fill up whole toilet, f----- moves over to bathtub crying spush a massive chunk out to cause him unimaginable pain >decide to add insult to injury >vibrate his ass cheeks at just the right frequency so it sounds like Billy Mays yelling "BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE >f------ dad opens the door augh maniacally as I shoot the rest of me out as fast as I can, coating his dad and the rest of the walls in S--- >thatll teach that fat n----- to eat raw f------ cookie dough HEAR THAT, YOU FAT F---? YOU DONT F--- WITH RAW COOKIE DOUGH □ Anonymous (ID: OobbGI10) 04/07/1 3(Sun) 1 8:22:04 No.471007201 Replies >>47 1007905ー47 1 008205 >feeling quite lonely, nobody used me in a while >just chilling in the dark sall of a sudden, this fat f----- bursts into the bathroom sohno >f----- releases a Kamehameha blast of s--- in me -entire mouth is full of s--- pg riend bathtub staring at me in horror >f----- goes in the bathtub, releasing a Shadow of the Colossus turd f----- dad breaks into door, killing Mr door e gets covered in sh >feelsbadman jpg Anonymous (ID: oobbGt10) 04/07/13(Sun)18:39:01 No.471010834 >chilling with fork wife, s--- was so cash sall of a sudden, this fat f----- f--- opens the drawer and stole me >scared as f--- >jams me in Ms. Cookie Dough she felt good to be inside of >feel ashamed because I am married >kid about to jam me in his mouth >pleaseno.jpg he does it she does this several times sreturn with my wife sleeping with wife hear the fat f----- crying and moaning in the bathroom >serves that f----- right Anonymous (ID: Heaven) 04/07/13 (Sun)18:30:05 No.471008873 >be billy may's ghost >his face tells me he thinks its nearly over

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