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Anon gets a job | /r/Greentext

WOJAK Orange How the F--- do you guys live a WageSlave Life? i just Finish my first day at KFC & already want to Kill myself >Crime is 100% a Option right now Gonna try & Save 2 months of pay & go back into the Drug game If not the Drug game serious Crime Risking Death/Jail through Committing crime is 100% a sensible option over wageslaving for minimum wage. Risk it all to get it all Life have no value any way
WOJAK Orange How the F--- do you guys live a WageSlave Life? i just Finish my first day at KFC & already want to Kill myself >Crime is 100% a Option right now Gonna try & Save 2 months of pay & go back into the Drug game If not the Drug game serious Crime Risking Death/Jail through Committing crime is 100% a sensible option over wageslaving for minimum wage. Risk it all to get it all Life have no value any way

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/fit/izen shares a story | /r/Greentext

20 Re 4 Img JPG 24KB (274 x 253) 3 Replies Zgym/stories >be me >at gym lifting as usual >some new gypsy guy comes in >he is the only gypsy guy at the gym >everyone is looking at him cuz f--- em dogs >1 hour later regular comes out screaming someone stole his phone >female gym owner immediately looks at the gypsy, tells him sorry but you have to stay, calls cops >until the cops arrive gypsy is yelling " you are racist, you have no proof you just do this because im a gypsy" trying to make himself the victim >cops arrive >find the phone in his shoes
20 Re 4 Img JPG 24KB (274 x 253) 3 Replies Zgym/stories >be me >at gym lifting as usual >some new gypsy guy comes in >he is the only gypsy guy at the gym >everyone is looking at him cuz f--- em dogs >1 hour later regular comes out screaming someone stole his phone >female gym owner immediately looks at the gypsy, tells him sorry but you have to stay, calls cops >until the cops arrive gypsy is yelling " you are racist, you have no proof you just do this because im a gypsy" trying to make himself the victim >cops arrive >find the phone in his shoes

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Anon Hacks The FBI | /r/Greentext

File: 1577068254173.jpg (1.53 MB, 2048x1536) O Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:03:43 No.146655429 >>146655975 >>146656019 >>146656362 >hacking scene >character inserts d--- in computer >"I'm in." >> Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:16:07 No.146655975 >> Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:16:52 No.146656019 >>146655429 (OP) top kek that pic I'm hacking the FBI.
File: 1577068254173.jpg (1.53 MB, 2048x1536) O Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:03:43 No.146655429 >>146655975 >>146656019 >>146656362 >hacking scene >character inserts d--- in computer >"I'm in." >> Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:16:07 No.146655975 >> Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:16:52 No.146656019 >>146655429 (OP) top kek that pic I'm hacking the FBI.

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anon invents a game | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:01:38 No.62349584 Fun New Game THIS WILL MAKE A FINE ADDITION TO MY COLLEÇTION addition-to-mycollection-more-collection.gif 245 KB GIF >be me >diagnosed schizophrenic >refuse to take schizophrenia medication >come up with new and exciting game >peruse the streets for any loose pills/medication >put them in my prescribed med bottle >shake thoroughly >close eyes when ingesting meds at prescribed times >May get the schizo meds... may not >call it...schizo roulette MRW I find a colorful pill on the ground gif related
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:01:38 No.62349584 Fun New Game THIS WILL MAKE A FINE ADDITION TO MY COLLEÇTION addition-to-mycollection-more-collection.gif 245 KB GIF >be me >diagnosed schizophrenic >refuse to take schizophrenia medication >come up with new and exciting game >peruse the streets for any loose pills/medication >put them in my prescribed med bottle >shake thoroughly >close eyes when ingesting meds at prescribed times >May get the schizo meds... may not >call it...schizo roulette MRW I find a colorful pill on the ground gif related

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anon takes the bus | /r/Greentext

U Anonymous 02/16/2 >be me >broke >take bus home >8/10 sits next to me >obviously tired >"Long shift?" >she changes seat what did i do wrong? + 5 replies omitted. Clic Anonymous 02/1 >>847485970 Meanie Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)15:02:55 No.847486060 >>847485525 (OP). Gave a f--- about women in 2021. Next.
U Anonymous 02/16/2 >be me >broke >take bus home >8/10 sits next to me >obviously tired >"Long shift?" >she changes seat what did i do wrong? + 5 replies omitted. Clic Anonymous 02/1 >>847485970 Meanie Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)15:02:55 No.847486060 >>847485525 (OP). Gave a f--- about women in 2021. Next.

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Anon rides the train | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)15:05:30 No.847494161 TRAIN 87403823-621B-4513-A23B-7A4711C8CA9A.jpg 56 KB JPG > be me > autistic > depressed > ride train > no longer depressed > thanks autism
: Anonymous 02/16/21(Tue)15:05:30 No.847494161 TRAIN 87403823-621B-4513-A23B-7A4711C8CA9A.jpg 56 KB JPG > be me > autistic > depressed > ride train > no longer depressed > thanks autism

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Anon is new | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:40:42 No.847480732 Hey everyone, I have never used 4chan before and I only heard about this place from reddit, what's this place like? 133 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:45:11 No.847480973 >>847480732 (OP) # There are a lot of Nazis and pedophiles. Also, p---.
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:40:42 No.847480732 Hey everyone, I have never used 4chan before and I only heard about this place from reddit, what's this place like? 133 KB JPG 1 Reply View Thread : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:45:11 No.847480973 >>847480732 (OP) # There are a lot of Nazis and pedophiles. Also, p---.

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Anon recalls the worst thing he’s ever done to a woman | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/14/21(Sun)22:03:47 No.847408130 Needed to access a few items on my google drive while at an ex gfs apartment in college. She gave me her macbook to do so. She left to get us dinner while I continued working. Knowing that I could find some nudes of her and feeling like taking a break... opened her iCloud. Enjoying looking at some of the nudes when I started to realize...l hadn't seen any of the recent ones. Since I was on her laptop, I opened iMessage since I was getting suspicious. Found conversations there of a guy she'd been cheating on me with(also the location where all these new nude pictures were being taken/sent. Saw them talking about having sex, and sneaking around on me. She'd been talking a ton about a big project presentation she had coming up. So I went into every powerpoint presentation that I could find in her files and changed the first slide to a picture of her she'd sent this guy. Completely naked, spread eagle with her face in frame. After she came back I broke up with her right then. Got a massive tirade of texts/calls the next day. Guess she'd opened the presentation in a lecture hall with 150 something students and several professors there for the presentations. >>847408443 # >>847408454 # >>847411734 #
: Anonymous 02/14/21(Sun)22:03:47 No.847408130 Needed to access a few items on my google drive while at an ex gfs apartment in college. She gave me her macbook to do so. She left to get us dinner while I continued working. Knowing that I could find some nudes of her and feeling like taking a break... opened her iCloud. Enjoying looking at some of the nudes when I started to realize...l hadn't seen any of the recent ones. Since I was on her laptop, I opened iMessage since I was getting suspicious. Found conversations there of a guy she'd been cheating on me with(also the location where all these new nude pictures were being taken/sent. Saw them talking about having sex, and sneaking around on me. She'd been talking a ton about a big project presentation she had coming up. So I went into every powerpoint presentation that I could find in her files and changed the first slide to a picture of her she'd sent this guy. Completely naked, spread eagle with her face in frame. After she came back I broke up with her right then. Got a massive tirade of texts/calls the next day. Guess she'd opened the presentation in a lecture hall with 150 something students and several professors there for the presentations. >>847408443 # >>847408454 # >>847411734 #

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Anon looks for greentexts | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:43:56 No.847465182 >be me >try to find some nice greentexts >open up /b/ >see nothing but hornyposting, n----- d---, and n------ begging for reparations >what are you people 37 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:48:38 No.847465503 >be me >Been on /b/ for 4 years >Recently stopped cause I got a life >Open /b today >See thread about an anon r----- his sister in a gas station or something and people asking for pics >Close /b and read a book >>847465557 # : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:49:36 No.847465557 : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:49:52 No.847465573 >be me >see greentext on 4chan >screenshot >go on Reddit >r/greentext 10 KB JPG >thanks 4chan : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:50:32 No.847465614 >be me >shred paper for an hour >shredder overheats >j------- to pictures of OP's mom till it cools down.
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:43:56 No.847465182 >be me >try to find some nice greentexts >open up /b/ >see nothing but hornyposting, n----- d---, and n------ begging for reparations >what are you people 37 KB JPG : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:48:38 No.847465503 >be me >Been on /b/ for 4 years >Recently stopped cause I got a life >Open /b today >See thread about an anon r----- his sister in a gas station or something and people asking for pics >Close /b and read a book >>847465557 # : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:49:36 No.847465557 : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:49:52 No.847465573 >be me >see greentext on 4chan >screenshot >go on Reddit >r/greentext 10 KB JPG >thanks 4chan : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)16:50:32 No.847465614 >be me >shred paper for an hour >shredder overheats >j------- to pictures of OP's mom till it cools down.

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Anon has a dent in his chest | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:14:44 No.847479070 Friend said I should share this here >be me, 13 >born with this deformity called funnel chest, have a ~1 inch dent in my ribcage, pic related >spending a week in some christian 16 KB JPG summer camp >go swimming one day >take shirt off, people immediately notice >dumbfucks are absolutely fascinated by the deformity >that evening one of my roommates comes into our room >tells me to pull my shirt up and lay on the floor >am confused but do it >m----------- takes out a bottle and pours water into the dent >dent acts as a bowl, most of the water stays in it >slurp the water out of the cavity with a straw
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)19:14:44 No.847479070 Friend said I should share this here >be me, 13 >born with this deformity called funnel chest, have a ~1 inch dent in my ribcage, pic related >spending a week in some christian 16 KB JPG summer camp >go swimming one day >take shirt off, people immediately notice >dumbfucks are absolutely fascinated by the deformity >that evening one of my roommates comes into our room >tells me to pull my shirt up and lay on the floor >am confused but do it >m----------- takes out a bottle and pours water into the dent >dent acts as a bowl, most of the water stays in it >slurp the water out of the cavity with a straw

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Brazil's top intellectual weighs in on politics | /r/Greentext

I BRAZILLIAN MONKE (ID: uet4lwzT) O 02/14/21(Sun)18:49:04 No.308130533 >>308130706 >>308131013 File: C49B3309-AF67-4FE6-AB48-7(.).jpg (11 KВ, 259х194) 000000000OOH 0000000000000000H 00OK 0000K AAAAAAAAAAH AAAAAAAAAAААAAAAAAAAАН ААННННННННННННННННННН AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Uuuh uuh uhh? UUUH AAAAААН АННН AAAAAAAAAННННН ОООООКК 000ооКК AAAAAAAAAАААAAААААААААН АААААААААААААААAAАААAАН ААААААААААААAAAAАAAAААН АААААААААААAAAAAAAАAAАН 000000000OOK 00000000OOK 00000000O00000OK OOK I Anonymous (ID: PU8W3IZE 1 02/14/21(Sun)18:50:20 No.308130706 >>308132105 >>308130533 thanks for your input brazil
I BRAZILLIAN MONKE (ID: uet4lwzT) O 02/14/21(Sun)18:49:04 No.308130533 >>308130706 >>308131013 File: C49B3309-AF67-4FE6-AB48-7(.).jpg (11 KВ, 259х194) 000000000OOH 0000000000000000H 00OK 0000K AAAAAAAAAAH AAAAAAAAAAААAAAAAAAAАН ААННННННННННННННННННН AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Uuuh uuh uhh? UUUH AAAAААН АННН AAAAAAAAAННННН ОООООКК 000ооКК AAAAAAAAAАААAAААААААААН АААААААААААААААAAАААAАН ААААААААААААAAAAАAAAААН АААААААААААAAAAAAAАAAАН 000000000OOK 00000000OOK 00000000O00000OK OOK I Anonymous (ID: PU8W3IZE 1 02/14/21(Sun)18:50:20 No.308130706 >>308132105 >>308130533 thanks for your input brazil

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anon goes shooping | /r/Greentext

File: krogeremployee.png (426 KB, 560x413) O Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)02:57:55 No.15587653 >be customer >self check out >PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE.jpg >look around >4 hours later >be worker >"hey bro you need help?" >types on screen in strangely effeminate fashion >types passcode too fast so it inputs wrong >types passcode too fast again >wrong again >finally gets it >doesn't check what the problem is >"thanks bro" >leaves >be customer >scan next item >PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE.jpg >repeat
File: krogeremployee.png (426 KB, 560x413) O Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)02:57:55 No.15587653 >be customer >self check out >PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE.jpg >look around >4 hours later >be worker >"hey bro you need help?" >types on screen in strangely effeminate fashion >types passcode too fast so it inputs wrong >types passcode too fast again >wrong again >finally gets it >doesn't check what the problem is >"thanks bro" >leaves >be customer >scan next item >PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE.jpg >repeat

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anon discovers the answer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21 (Mon)13:59:32 No.62343239 >be ugly and nice to her >she doesn't care >be ugly and mean to her >she doesn't care >be attractive and nice to her >she likes you >be attractive and mean to her >she likes you even more >>62343290 # >>62343366 # : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:02:06 No.62343278 >>62343232 # Holy mother of god .The sacred scrolls. 47 KB JPG
: Anonymous 02/15/21 (Mon)13:59:32 No.62343239 >be ugly and nice to her >she doesn't care >be ugly and mean to her >she doesn't care >be attractive and nice to her >she likes you >be attractive and mean to her >she likes you even more >>62343290 # >>62343366 # : Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)14:02:06 No.62343278 >>62343232 # Holy mother of god .The sacred scrolls. 47 KB JPG

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Anon is a coomer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)04:36:28 No.847434498 I want to tell you guys about the c-- shorts. >be me, 20 yo, kind of skinny and feminine >fap on /trash/'s /ftt/ all the time >lewd talk with an anon that likes posting 3 KB JPG pictures of traps in spandex >"wait - I have spandex shorts for when I workout and bike" >decide to wear them during my next /ftt/ session >sexting with anons - rubbing my bulge through the tight, silky material >c-- in my spandex shorts, my hot spunk seeping through the fabric and making a mess >decide against washing it, leave the c---stained shorts alone until I feel like fapping again >next day, put on the c-- shorts and shoot my load into it once more Been doing this for a week now and I still haven't washed them. How long can I go on like this before I invent a new strain of AIDS or Herpes from the build up?
: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)04:36:28 No.847434498 I want to tell you guys about the c-- shorts. >be me, 20 yo, kind of skinny and feminine >fap on /trash/'s /ftt/ all the time >lewd talk with an anon that likes posting 3 KB JPG pictures of traps in spandex >"wait - I have spandex shorts for when I workout and bike" >decide to wear them during my next /ftt/ session >sexting with anons - rubbing my bulge through the tight, silky material >c-- in my spandex shorts, my hot spunk seeping through the fabric and making a mess >decide against washing it, leave the c---stained shorts alone until I feel like fapping again >next day, put on the c-- shorts and shoot my load into it once more Been doing this for a week now and I still haven't washed them. How long can I go on like this before I invent a new strain of AIDS or Herpes from the build up?

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Anon like boyz | /r/Greentext

Anonymous No. 49384163 (3 m) >be me >have one shot at life >born gay in iran mfw PNG 429.57 KB
Anonymous No. 49384163 (3 m) >be me >have one shot at life >born gay in iran mfw PNG 429.57 KB

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Anon rides a bus | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 12/09/20(Wed)15:29:48 No.6130847 >>61307781 (OP) >be me >waiting at bus station >bus arrives >get on bus >reach destination >get off bus
Anonymous 12/09/20(Wed)15:29:48 No.6130847 >>61307781 (OP) >be me >waiting at bus station >bus arrives >get on bus >reach destination >get off bus

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She's the bomb | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21 (Mon)12:11:21 No.62341896 fabc35dee775bcdac2ffa64de4c75e860560139768986e54fb0a433e5 90 KB JPG >Hey anon. I'm back. *kisses you* >God, you have such cute blue eyes.*strokes your hair* >My feet are so tired, have been killing palestinians all day. Will you give me a foot rub?
: Anonymous 02/15/21 (Mon)12:11:21 No.62341896 fabc35dee775bcdac2ffa64de4c75e860560139768986e54fb0a433e5 90 KB JPG >Hey anon. I'm back. *kisses you* >God, you have such cute blue eyes.*strokes your hair* >My feet are so tired, have been killing palestinians all day. Will you give me a foot rub?

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Cold comfort | /r/Greentext

File: 1583394903294.jpg (47 KB, 1200x1200) Anonymous 02/12/21(Fri)06:12:39 No.847191605 [Reply] >>847193650 > /b/ me > wake up in middle of night > needtoshit.jpg > use bathroom in the dark > realise I feel still half asleep > in an attempt to condition my mind into not thinking pissing myself in my sleep is ok, I begin to move my arms and touch the cold walls to feel "in reality" > finish s--- > go back to sleep Fast forward two days later. > /b/ me still > go to the bathroom > "I better check I'm actually awake!" > flail arms, touch cold walls > "yep, seems to check out" > commencepiss.gif > immediately wake up from dream > covered in piss How the f--- has my brain cucked me out of my own consciousness? How has it managed to bypass what's basically a lucid dreaming technique? F---.
File: 1583394903294.jpg (47 KB, 1200x1200) Anonymous 02/12/21(Fri)06:12:39 No.847191605 [Reply] >>847193650 > /b/ me > wake up in middle of night > needtoshit.jpg > use bathroom in the dark > realise I feel still half asleep > in an attempt to condition my mind into not thinking pissing myself in my sleep is ok, I begin to move my arms and touch the cold walls to feel "in reality" > finish s--- > go back to sleep Fast forward two days later. > /b/ me still > go to the bathroom > "I better check I'm actually awake!" > flail arms, touch cold walls > "yep, seems to check out" > commencepiss.gif > immediately wake up from dream > covered in piss How the f--- has my brain cucked me out of my own consciousness? How has it managed to bypass what's basically a lucid dreaming technique? F---.

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Anon experiences "American Freedom" | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/01/12(Wed)08:16 No.23795638 File: 1343823371325.jpg-(81 KB, 360x360, 1329732873924.jpg) >>23795414 >be australian >hear from 4chan about american freedom >decide to experience it for myself >fly to states >arrive at JFK airport >get a strip search, x-ray and MRI scan to make GREATEAT HITA sure I'm "not a terrorist" >finally escape from airport >arrive at the statue of liberty to collect my freedom >get shot by seven men >crawl to the nearest hospital, bleeding >hospital will treat me but it costs 3 million USD >try to tell them about our superior free health care >get arrested for "threatening national security" >get sent to guantanamo bay >Obama sends drone strikes to Grom Grom to kill my family >mfw
Anonymous 08/01/12(Wed)08:16 No.23795638 File: 1343823371325.jpg-(81 KB, 360x360, 1329732873924.jpg) >>23795414 >be australian >hear from 4chan about american freedom >decide to experience it for myself >fly to states >arrive at JFK airport >get a strip search, x-ray and MRI scan to make GREATEAT HITA sure I'm "not a terrorist" >finally escape from airport >arrive at the statue of liberty to collect my freedom >get shot by seven men >crawl to the nearest hospital, bleeding >hospital will treat me but it costs 3 million USD >try to tell them about our superior free health care >get arrested for "threatening national security" >get sent to guantanamo bay >Obama sends drone strikes to Grom Grom to kill my family >mfw

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Anon hates his brother | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >Be me yesterday >Mom and Dad ask how to check history in big bro's laptop >Perfect to take revenge >Open it for them but it's empty >ldea.jpg >Ask them to check cookies and search for xxx sites >Get about 10 sites >Parents angru and me happy >mfw when they ask for my laptop >mfw when I realise that I never delete cookies >Mfw when l've got pages of undeleted cookies >mfw when we both get shout at >mfw karma How bad did I f--- this up
Anonymous >Be me yesterday >Mom and Dad ask how to check history in big bro's laptop >Perfect to take revenge >Open it for them but it's empty >ldea.jpg >Ask them to check cookies and search for xxx sites >Get about 10 sites >Parents angru and me happy >mfw when they ask for my laptop >mfw when I realise that I never delete cookies >Mfw when l've got pages of undeleted cookies >mfw when we both get shout at >mfw karma How bad did I f--- this up

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