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Anonymous 08/01/12(Wed)08:16 No.23795638 File: 1343823371325.jpg-(81 KB, 360x360, 1329732873924.jpg) >>23795414 >be australian >hear from 4chan about american freedom >decide to experience it for myself >fly to states >arrive at JFK airport >get a strip search, x-ray and MRI scan to make GREATEAT HITA sure I'm "not a terrorist" >finally escape from airport >arrive at the statue of liberty to collect my freedom >get shot by seven men >crawl to the nearest hospital, bleeding >hospital will treat me but it costs 3 million USD >try to tell them about our superior free health care >get arrested for "threatening national security" >get sent to guantanamo bay >Obama sends drone strikes to Grom Grom to kill my family >mfw

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Origin Entry: Greentext Stories

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HOW IS YOUR NIGHT GOING /v/? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:34 No.39833040 Mine is doing good, I just sat down and cracked open a bear and about to play some TF2. Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:35 No.39833090 You cracked open a bear? Anonymous 10/11/09(Sun)18:36 No.39833114 >Cracked open a bear Oh god what OP TF2 IS FOR CASUALS Crro Lack

Anonymous (ID: 31kpyf2g) I f------ hate these people 07/11/21(Sun)21:52:59 No.329597517 1d Amen. As a Democract, I worry about us allowing our cities to become wastelands of homeless drug addicts. I am excited to move out to the suburbs because at least life will be pleasant out there, even if I have to live amongst the Republicans. I want to be able to go for a walk without fear of attack. Do Democrats only care about the rights of antisocial drug addicted transients? I will never vote Republican, but I hate how us Dems don't have the courage to let the ends justify the means. 1625859701519m.jpg 110 KB JPG there is no political solution Anonymous (ID: ricZnDZD) >>329597517 (OP) # 07/11/21(Sun)21:55:23 No.329597743 >I recognize that my party doesn't have my best interests in mind >in fact, I can see that my party favors literal criminals over law abiding citizens >I have to literally pack my s--- up and move because my party ruined my home >I wont ever change the way I vote though Imao Democracy was a mistake >>329599805 # >>329600177 # >>329601081 #

34 KB JPG >Be born in 1949 >Don't have to fight in a war >Be 20 years old in time for the summer of '69 >Pick up some ridiculous 11/10 who's hitchhiking to Woodstock in my Plymouth Roadrunner I bought after working a summer job for a month >She's immediately into me because she's from a small town and I'm the only man in her life who's not her father or brother >Bring her home and marry her >Go to get a job, hired off the street with no experience and get trained >Buy 10 acres of land for less than what I make in a year >rent out my land for decades >retire and sit around house all day looking at my collection of boats and cars I never use Kids today just don't understand hard work and pulling themselves up by their bootstraps

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Anon hates his brother | /r/Greentext

Anonymous >Be me yesterday >Mom and Dad ask how to check history in big bro's laptop >Perfect to take revenge >Open it for them but it's empty >ldea.jpg >Ask them to check cookies and search for xxx sites >Get about 10 sites >Parents angru and me happy >mfw when they ask for my laptop >mfw when I realise that I never delete cookies >Mfw when l've got pages of undeleted cookies >mfw when we both get shout at >mfw karma How bad did I f--- this up

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In a human grocery store | /r/Greentext

Anonymous E 02/15/21(Mon)06:07:05 No.139581423 >>139581506 >>139581614 >>139581725 >>139581822 >>139582044 >>139583235 >be in the grocery store >suddenly think of a funny thing >start smiling uncontrollably >realize that you are in public where people can see you and you're making a fool of yourself >try to forcibly curb the smile causing kind of a civil war in your face muscles Does this happen in your culture? O Anonymous + 02/15/21(Mon)06:08:49 No.139581506 >>139581423 (OP) # I saw you do this Embarassing

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Anon buys new clothes and gets called a loser | /r/Greentext

Anonymous | 45243472 >be me >22 yo >overweight beta loser >decide to f--- it all and get my life in control >get new clothes >go to the gym >work out harder than ever in my life >sweat dripping off me >can't feel my legs >a couple of chads walk by >hear one of them say to the other >"What a fat loser" 42,2 kB JPG >... >He's technically right >l am losing a lot of fat 3 REPLIES O IMAGES REPLY Anonymous | 45243502 Nice keep going man

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Anon likes 4chan | /r/Greentext

Today at 9:07 PM ik i went for a jogg it was nice whatr u doing for valentines day? Today at 9:19 PM uhhhhh hanging out on 4chan Imao i relate to them i guess >f--- f--- f--- >he doesn't like edgy egirls >how do i fix this he's ignoring me 7h (2/15 5:37) · 62334917 >>62334907 (OP) nothing but bad things can come from telling people you use 4channel

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No one wants to hear Anon's story | /r/Greentext

wonder >be me >find 4chan >want to post irl story >scroll through posts about c-- shorts >scroll by a g--------- >wonder if anyone will give a s--- about a lucid dream story

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Anon discusses Aragorn | /r/Greentext

63 Re · 13 Img JPG 42KB (540 × 540) 19 Replies >rusted, chipped p------------ sword, probably been rusting in the caverns for three decades >"this is a good sword" Was Aragorn the first autistic king?

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Anon wants a girlfriend | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21 (Mon)04:18:04 No.847437816 >be me ap Discover something new Sporeored >zerkin off >reading some hentai >see the 2 characters hug eachother >"damn" 77 KB JPG >"...damn.." >think about hugging someone >really want hug someone >think about how nice it would feel >havent hugged someone legitimately in like 8 years I wish i had a girlfriend

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Anon has a bad Valentine's day | /r/Greentext

>bf met up with me just to dump me, on Valentine's day >after I spent three hours making chocolates for him >just gave him them and cried at home 2h (2/15 10:29) · 62337988 I almost felt sorry for but then I remembered that you're not actually a cute anime girl 2h (2/15 10:32) · 62338012 >>62337970 (OP) Why did you give him the chocolate? Should have just poured it all over him or give it to me

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Anon has a police women fetish | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)12:05:27 No.847435416 DSC_049.png 603 KB PNG >told this girl i had a fetish for police woman >i am black >she sent me this with the caption >"POV i am standing on your neck"

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Anon builds a paper towel rocket | /r/Greentext

File: nostalgic pepe.jpg (18 KB, 500x300) O Anonymous 02/15/21(Mon)01:10:49 No.847420228 >be me >be in science class 8th grade >teacher has a paper towel building competition >me and friends work together to build tower >only 2 designs worked so far, another group and my group >everyone in class copies other group >my group realizes that our tower looks like rocket >we write space x on the side and long live elon musk >teacher says it is time to clean up >we give it a proper space x launch and throw it on the floor >wish i could be happy like i was then

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Anon solved the problem | /r/Greentext

Share the most retarded thing you've ever done. I'll go first. >be me 138 KB PNG >23 days ago >driving drunk as f---, run a red light, ram into a f------ cop car at 20 mph >cars are not too damaged >drunk mind is scared as s--- >unable to think of a reason, stab myself with my pocket knife before the cop comes over >hide knife in glove box >say, "I had been stabbed officer" >cop gives me a ride to the nearest hospital mfw crisis avoided

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Windows crashes for Anon | /r/Greentext

>be me >windows crashes >browser session with 500 tabs didn't open up >realize that by opening the browser i just deleted last session >run recovery software >the session was overwritten by windows defender even though it's turned off by group policy

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Greentext Stories - Anon experiences "American Freedom" | /r/Greentext

PROTIP: Press the ← and → keys to navigate the gallery, 'g' to view the gallery, or 'r' to view a random image.

Anonymous 08/01/12(Wed)08:16 No.23795638 File: 1343823371325.jpg-(81 KB, 360x360, 1329732873924.jpg) >>23795414 >be australian >hear from 4chan about american freedom >decide to experience it for myself >fly to states >arrive at JFK airport >get a strip search, x-ray and MRI scan to make GREATEAT HITA sure I'm "not a terrorist" >finally escape from airport >arrive at the statue of liberty to collect my freedom >get shot by seven men >crawl to the nearest hospital, bleeding >hospital will treat me but it costs 3 million USD >try to tell them about our superior free health care >get arrested for "threatening national security" >get sent to guantanamo bay >Obama sends drone strikes to Grom Grom to kill my family >mfw

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