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Mel Gibson wrote a new movie | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: Js5HX1qE 07/08/22(Fri)10:08:28 No.385777168 جامش mov_32056_126-b.jpg 218 KB JPG This is an Iranian comedy movie about time traveling Nazis that try to recreate holocaust in 2020 but can't get even get close to 6 million with modern technology Say something nice about it
: Anonymous (ID: Js5HX1qE 07/08/22(Fri)10:08:28 No.385777168 جامش mov_32056_126-b.jpg 218 KB JPG This is an Iranian comedy movie about time traveling Nazis that try to recreate holocaust in 2020 but can't get even get close to 6 million with modern technology Say something nice about it

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Anon gets a degree | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 03/07/16(Mon)12:01:52 No.66780320 >>66780042 >live in germany >college is free >people who finish college at like 24 sometimes even decide to get a second degree >free >of >charge >be American >try to rush through college as fast as possible to get a degree at like 22 >get f----- in the ass by the economy and job market >go back to college to study something that's not ruined by a dead market run by jews >have to stop studying after a couple of semesters because crippling debt >get put into prison for 10 years because debts can't be paid >future ruined >get s----- desk job in some s----- ass skyscraper for a company that pays you in Happy Meals >look outside the window >plane crashes into your building >die
Anonymous 03/07/16(Mon)12:01:52 No.66780320 >>66780042 >live in germany >college is free >people who finish college at like 24 sometimes even decide to get a second degree >free >of >charge >be American >try to rush through college as fast as possible to get a degree at like 22 >get f----- in the ass by the economy and job market >go back to college to study something that's not ruined by a dead market run by jews >have to stop studying after a couple of semesters because crippling debt >get put into prison for 10 years because debts can't be paid >future ruined >get s----- desk job in some s----- ass skyscraper for a company that pays you in Happy Meals >look outside the window >plane crashes into your building >die

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Anon finds a way to save money | /r/Greentext

File: MVIMG_20230303_144516.jpg (11 KB, 317x423) King of the Homeless Anonymous 03/06/23 (Mon)06:16:19 No.72466546 [Reply] D >>72466556 >>72466783 >live in poor area, tons of homeless people >constantly bugged for money if not yelled at for it >basically forced to cough up spare change >get idea >wear this ski mas downtown with a big coat and hat >homeless people look at me now with fear >get complimented on it by some of them >never lose cash to give to the homeless anymore >king of the homeless Anonymous 03/06/23 (Mon)06:17:46 No.72466556 >>72466546 (OP). your wheel is turning now, anon every king is backed by the threat of force, keep a knife on you >>72466567
File: MVIMG_20230303_144516.jpg (11 KB, 317x423) King of the Homeless Anonymous 03/06/23 (Mon)06:16:19 No.72466546 [Reply] D >>72466556 >>72466783 >live in poor area, tons of homeless people >constantly bugged for money if not yelled at for it >basically forced to cough up spare change >get idea >wear this ski mas downtown with a big coat and hat >homeless people look at me now with fear >get complimented on it by some of them >never lose cash to give to the homeless anymore >king of the homeless Anonymous 03/06/23 (Mon)06:17:46 No.72466556 >>72466546 (OP). your wheel is turning now, anon every king is backed by the threat of force, keep a knife on you >>72466567

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anon doesn't like a fresh one | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous how to get my bf to stop farti(...) 03/07/23 (Tue) 18:57:06 No.28505832 >it was all cute and fun in the beginning that we could fart around each other. >then things took a turn for the worse...he just would not stop. >he aims for my face every time too. Most times he can go three times 41 KB JPG back-to-back. >we are normally naked around each other, which makes it so much worse. >I can feel, smell and taste it when he rips a fresh one. >he takes a lot of pride in his stink bombs, especially when he gets me square in the face. >It's getting traumatizing because I can literally tell what he had for breakfast. > I already begged him to stop with the booty belches but that amuses him even more. > I even threatened no sex but that didn't faze him in the slightest. He is really cute and hot. Even when he farts on my face, I'm not any less attracted to him but I need him to stop with the god awful stink bombs directly aimed at my face. How do I get him to stop? I need this to stop.
: Anonymous how to get my bf to stop farti(...) 03/07/23 (Tue) 18:57:06 No.28505832 >it was all cute and fun in the beginning that we could fart around each other. >then things took a turn for the worse...he just would not stop. >he aims for my face every time too. Most times he can go three times 41 KB JPG back-to-back. >we are normally naked around each other, which makes it so much worse. >I can feel, smell and taste it when he rips a fresh one. >he takes a lot of pride in his stink bombs, especially when he gets me square in the face. >It's getting traumatizing because I can literally tell what he had for breakfast. > I already begged him to stop with the booty belches but that amuses him even more. > I even threatened no sex but that didn't faze him in the slightest. He is really cute and hot. Even when he farts on my face, I'm not any less attracted to him but I need him to stop with the god awful stink bombs directly aimed at my face. How do I get him to stop? I need this to stop.

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Master, Master | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 09/28/20 (Mon)22:04:59 No.60245207 File: 64MFIt8.png (62 KB, 747x686) >>60245353 >>60245359 >>60245420 >>60245546 >hanging out with my friend at his girlfriend's apartment >her 8/10 neighbor is there too and keeps giving me the eye >as i'm about to leave, neighbor girl invites me to her apartment to hang out >she closes door behind me and asks if we are going to f--- >have to piss so ask to use her bathroom >get so turned on that she wants to f--- me that I j------- while i'm in the bathroom >leave bathroom >my urge to f--- is gone now >say I'm tired and just leave her apartment
Anonymous 09/28/20 (Mon)22:04:59 No.60245207 File: 64MFIt8.png (62 KB, 747x686) >>60245353 >>60245359 >>60245420 >>60245546 >hanging out with my friend at his girlfriend's apartment >her 8/10 neighbor is there too and keeps giving me the eye >as i'm about to leave, neighbor girl invites me to her apartment to hang out >she closes door behind me and asks if we are going to f--- >have to piss so ask to use her bathroom >get so turned on that she wants to f--- me that I j------- while i'm in the bathroom >leave bathroom >my urge to f--- is gone now >say I'm tired and just leave her apartment

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Anon eats mashed potatoes | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/11/15(Sun)00:52:48 No.278967239 >>278967358 >>278968009>>278968306 >Roommates gone >Decide to stay in and play some Metal Gear Solid with a big plate of mashed potatoes >Needs more butter >Get up, put on a Solid Snake voice "THESE POTATOES NEED MORE BUTTER" >tactical crawl to the kitchen >Open the fridge and grab some butter "MM, NOT BAD." >tactical crawl back to the living room, put butter on potatoes "FINALLY, A MASH TO SURPASS METAL GEAR" >F------ roommates walk in >mfw they were home all along >mfw hiding in my room because of the shame
Anonymous 01/11/15(Sun)00:52:48 No.278967239 >>278967358 >>278968009>>278968306 >Roommates gone >Decide to stay in and play some Metal Gear Solid with a big plate of mashed potatoes >Needs more butter >Get up, put on a Solid Snake voice "THESE POTATOES NEED MORE BUTTER" >tactical crawl to the kitchen >Open the fridge and grab some butter "MM, NOT BAD." >tactical crawl back to the living room, put butter on potatoes "FINALLY, A MASH TO SURPASS METAL GEAR" >F------ roommates walk in >mfw they were home all along >mfw hiding in my room because of the shame

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Anon is in college | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 44 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)20:21:33 No.895506543 >be in college >in class >someone interrupts to give their opinion >its retarded Why does this happen everyday?
Anonymous 44 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)20:21:33 No.895506543 >be in college >in class >someone interrupts to give their opinion >its retarded Why does this happen everyday?

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Most trope-y /b post | /r/Greentext

R:0 ► I just fapped to T----- p--- and ate my own c--. I don't have the Big Gay r r right guys?
R:0 ► I just fapped to T----- p--- and ate my own c--. I don't have the Big Gay r r right guys?

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Anon wants to get stronger | /r/Greentext

Don't fall for the memes bros Anonymous 05/06/22(Fri)17:20:25 No.66657706 [Reply]► >>66658406 >Be me >Want to start getting stronger and more confident >Discover /fit/ >Specifically the greentext about the guy who goes out at night and fights random people >Decide to try it myself last night Mfw my last memory is getting smacked in the nose and I just woke up after having surgery to rebuild my nose +53 replies and 22 images omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 05/06/22 (Fri)18:24:11 No.66658395 >>66658061 Lmao literally life RPG mode Anonymous 05/06/22(Fri)18:24:49 No.66658406 File: MOP (11).png (80 KB, 179x282) >>66657706 (OP) >>66657823 >Not larping f------ kek you deserve it retard
Don't fall for the memes bros Anonymous 05/06/22(Fri)17:20:25 No.66657706 [Reply]► >>66658406 >Be me >Want to start getting stronger and more confident >Discover /fit/ >Specifically the greentext about the guy who goes out at night and fights random people >Decide to try it myself last night Mfw my last memory is getting smacked in the nose and I just woke up after having surgery to rebuild my nose +53 replies and 22 images omitted. Click here to view. >> Anonymous 05/06/22 (Fri)18:24:11 No.66658395 >>66658061 Lmao literally life RPG mode Anonymous 05/06/22(Fri)18:24:49 No.66658406 File: MOP (11).png (80 KB, 179x282) >>66657706 (OP) >>66657823 >Not larping f------ kek you deserve it retard

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Turn the other Cheek | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 71 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)05:56:28 No.895478950 >be me >around 2014 >15 at the time >really into swimming >one of the best in my class >wearing a speedo thing >one day during practice, go too close to the lane dividers >catches right on my left buttcheek >not top of speedo, dead center >tears hole through it >quickly jump out of pool and get another speedo from the coach >its from lost and found but is right size >I thought no one noticed, but one of the girls did >rumors got around >known as the one cheek wonder from then on out in reference to regular show which was popular then >also got herpes from the speedo >now 23 >think of how life would be different >sad
Anonymous 71 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)05:56:28 No.895478950 >be me >around 2014 >15 at the time >really into swimming >one of the best in my class >wearing a speedo thing >one day during practice, go too close to the lane dividers >catches right on my left buttcheek >not top of speedo, dead center >tears hole through it >quickly jump out of pool and get another speedo from the coach >its from lost and found but is right size >I thought no one noticed, but one of the girls did >rumors got around >known as the one cheek wonder from then on out in reference to regular show which was popular then >also got herpes from the speedo >now 23 >think of how life would be different >sad

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Anon does a good service | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)17:17:34 No.628704441 >>628702859 (OP) # I'm the guy that paid $500 for EMPRESS to crack Yakuza, Resident Evil 8, and FarCry 6. I also would regularly send her $200 membership fees to be in her secret discord and I would also just randomly send her $1000 a few times because I liked it when she said nice things about me. Overall I probably gave her around $10,000 over the past year or so. 156 KB PNG Anyway a few months ago I asked her if it would be possible for me to buy her underwear off her and she banned me from all her communities and blocked my email. I've tried emailing her using different emails to apologise but she never responds. I'm willing to pay for Persona 5 crack (I would've done it anyway) I just need you guys to help me get back in her good books. If anyone could help this post to get to her (she'll know who I am, her email is empress8@protonmail.com) or if you're in The Fireplace if you could reach out to her on my behalf, I'd greatly appreciate it, I'll pay for the Persona 5 crack. Tell her I'm so so sorry I was way out of line I should never have asked her of that and I will remember my place from now on. >>628704472 # >>628704519 # >>628704536 # >>628704580 # >>628704598 # >>628704615 # >>628704662 # >>628704672 # >>628704679 # >>628704680 # >>628705961 # >>628706256 # >>628706385 # >>628706582 # >>628706660 # >>628707848 # >>628710015 # >>628711692 # >>628713823 #
: Anonymous 02/23/23(Thu)17:17:34 No.628704441 >>628702859 (OP) # I'm the guy that paid $500 for EMPRESS to crack Yakuza, Resident Evil 8, and FarCry 6. I also would regularly send her $200 membership fees to be in her secret discord and I would also just randomly send her $1000 a few times because I liked it when she said nice things about me. Overall I probably gave her around $10,000 over the past year or so. 156 KB PNG Anyway a few months ago I asked her if it would be possible for me to buy her underwear off her and she banned me from all her communities and blocked my email. I've tried emailing her using different emails to apologise but she never responds. I'm willing to pay for Persona 5 crack (I would've done it anyway) I just need you guys to help me get back in her good books. If anyone could help this post to get to her (she'll know who I am, her email is empress8@protonmail.com) or if you're in The Fireplace if you could reach out to her on my behalf, I'd greatly appreciate it, I'll pay for the Persona 5 crack. Tell her I'm so so sorry I was way out of line I should never have asked her of that and I will remember my place from now on. >>628704472 # >>628704519 # >>628704536 # >>628704580 # >>628704598 # >>628704615 # >>628704662 # >>628704672 # >>628704679 # >>628704680 # >>628705961 # >>628706256 # >>628706385 # >>628706582 # >>628706660 # >>628707848 # >>628710015 # >>628711692 # >>628713823 #

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And it makes me wonder | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 492 KB PNG 03/07/23(Tue)07:46:56 No.72480652 >guy falls down face first down a flight of stares >everyone just stares at him like NPCs in a video game >was the only one who went to see if the guy was ok Why are normies like this?
: Anonymous 492 KB PNG 03/07/23(Tue)07:46:56 No.72480652 >guy falls down face first down a flight of stares >everyone just stares at him like NPCs in a video game >was the only one who went to see if the guy was ok Why are normies like this?

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Anon interacts with a gym qt | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 20 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)08:07:11 No.72479685 >be me >take the /fit/pill >start going to gym regularly >have been going for about a month or so now >decide to start using barbell >set myself up for benching >figure 100lbs is an ok start >first rep push it out fine, bringing it back down is a struggle >can't push it back up >i'm holding it about an inch from my throat >start panicking, yell out for help >gym qt about half my size rushes over, helps me put the bar back in the rack >i'm bright red with embarrassment, try to laugh it off, thank her >she says nothing, doesn't even look at me, just goes back to her squats >notice a few gymbros sniggering at me >leave quickly, tears in my eyes Don't bother with the gym, anons. It truly is not worth it.
Anonymous 20 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)08:07:11 No.72479685 >be me >take the /fit/pill >start going to gym regularly >have been going for about a month or so now >decide to start using barbell >set myself up for benching >figure 100lbs is an ok start >first rep push it out fine, bringing it back down is a struggle >can't push it back up >i'm holding it about an inch from my throat >start panicking, yell out for help >gym qt about half my size rushes over, helps me put the bar back in the rack >i'm bright red with embarrassment, try to laugh it off, thank her >she says nothing, doesn't even look at me, just goes back to her squats >notice a few gymbros sniggering at me >leave quickly, tears in my eyes Don't bother with the gym, anons. It truly is not worth it.

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anon has hope | /r/Greentext

33 KB JPG >get a match on tinder >see who it is >some cute girl >I'll give it 5 minutes until she unmatches >it was actually 10 minutes until she unmatched
33 KB JPG >get a match on tinder >see who it is >some cute girl >I'll give it 5 minutes until she unmatches >it was actually 10 minutes until she unmatched

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Anon is italian | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous f--- Modena 13 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)08:49:13 No.72478350 >be me >have micro-anxiety attack every morning >Nothing much just nausea and heavy breathing >Go to university >While passing by the Duomo a pidgeon greets me >heartwarming.jpg >walk another 20meters >see a dead pidgeon >mfw day ruined >pic related
: Anonymous f--- Modena 13 KB JPG 03/07/23(Tue)08:49:13 No.72478350 >be me >have micro-anxiety attack every morning >Nothing much just nausea and heavy breathing >Go to university >While passing by the Duomo a pidgeon greets me >heartwarming.jpg >walk another 20meters >see a dead pidgeon >mfw day ruined >pic related

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Anon summarizing Scatman John | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 27 KB GIF 04/27/17(Thu)00:31:07 No.72436761 >dream of being a professional musician, but have a terrible stuttering problem >suffer constant embarrassment and shame due to stuttering on stage >become alcoholic to cope with failure >one day realize stuttering goes away when scat singing >become The Scatman >get record deal, sell millions of records, and achieve international fame at age 55 >immediately get cancer and die
Anonymous 27 KB GIF 04/27/17(Thu)00:31:07 No.72436761 >dream of being a professional musician, but have a terrible stuttering problem >suffer constant embarrassment and shame due to stuttering on stage >become alcoholic to cope with failure >one day realize stuttering goes away when scat singing >become The Scatman >get record deal, sell millions of records, and achieve international fame at age 55 >immediately get cancer and die

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