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anon gets pimp slapped | /r/Greentext

65 KB JPG my bf slapped me. >bf's grandma has a stroke and goes into septic shock >we go to the hospital >he goes in and talks to the doctors >he comes back out and tells me she's been declared braindead >I try to lighten the mood by saying "sounds like not much has changed" >he asks me what I mean >"well, you know... she was always kind of a... you know... ditz... airhead... was that a bad joke?" >he walks over to me and backhands me
65 KB JPG my bf slapped me. >bf's grandma has a stroke and goes into septic shock >we go to the hospital >he goes in and talks to the doctors >he comes back out and tells me she's been declared braindead >I try to lighten the mood by saying "sounds like not much has changed" >he asks me what I mean >"well, you know... she was always kind of a... you know... ditz... airhead... was that a bad joke?" >he walks over to me and backhands me

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Heisencuck | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/25(Sat)20:39:39 No.208492354 I f----- Ted skyler-white-breaking-bad.gif 45 KB GIF >This is the best idea a woman could come up with to make man angry
Anonymous 02/08/25(Sat)20:39:39 No.208492354 I f----- Ted skyler-white-breaking-bad.gif 45 KB GIF >This is the best idea a woman could come up with to make man angry

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Anon drops the soap | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/25 (Sat) 18:14:16 No.208490433 road house.png 1.7 MB PNG >I used to f--- guys like you in prison lolwut
Anonymous 02/08/25 (Sat) 18:14:16 No.208490433 road house.png 1.7 MB PNG >I used to f--- guys like you in prison lolwut

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Anon philosophizes | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 143 KB JPG 02/08/25(Sat) 10:26:27 No.931060018 > Amerifats will f--- anything under 200 pounds >will f--- almost anything over 200 pounds Amerifats literally think skinny = hot. Now we have Hawk Tuah to be considered as "mildly attractive" (to amerifats). She's a f------ gopher you retards.
: Anonymous 143 KB JPG 02/08/25(Sat) 10:26:27 No.931060018 > Amerifats will f--- anything under 200 pounds >will f--- almost anything over 200 pounds Amerifats literally think skinny = hot. Now we have Hawk Tuah to be considered as "mildly attractive" (to amerifats). She's a f------ gopher you retards.

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Smarter than Batman | /r/Greentext

Anonymous Invincible 02/07/25(Fri)22:46:51 No.147411435 28 KB JPG >NOOO CECIL! YOU CAN'T JUST REHABILITATE VILLAINS TO USE THEIR SKILLS AND POWERS FOR GOOD! THEY HAVE TO ROT IN PRISON FOREVER (which they'll eventually escape from anyway) FOR KILLING PEOPLE! Jesus what was Mark's problem? Cecil was completely reasonable here.
Anonymous Invincible 02/07/25(Fri)22:46:51 No.147411435 28 KB JPG >NOOO CECIL! YOU CAN'T JUST REHABILITATE VILLAINS TO USE THEIR SKILLS AND POWERS FOR GOOD! THEY HAVE TO ROT IN PRISON FOREVER (which they'll eventually escape from anyway) FOR KILLING PEOPLE! Jesus what was Mark's problem? Cecil was completely reasonable here.

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Shoutout to wholesome mom | /r/Greentext

9.9 kB JPG >be 11 year old me >Minecraft 1.0 comes out >want to get it >mom doesn't get me it at first >feelsbad.png >Easter rolls around >mom hands me a paper >its a username and password >mom got me an account for Easter >thanks mom >play minecraft all the time >make lots of memories and friends playing minecraft >fast forward to now >redownload Minecraft for the hell of it >look around for paper with username and password >find it >username is my name spelled backwards >lol >password... >"lovemom" >love you mom
9.9 kB JPG >be 11 year old me >Minecraft 1.0 comes out >want to get it >mom doesn't get me it at first >feelsbad.png >Easter rolls around >mom hands me a paper >its a username and password >mom got me an account for Easter >thanks mom >play minecraft all the time >make lots of memories and friends playing minecraft >fast forward to now >redownload Minecraft for the hell of it >look around for paper with username and password >find it >username is my name spelled backwards >lol >password... >"lovemom" >love you mom

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Anons weekend routine (mine too) | /r/Greentext

Anonymous L'OREAL 12/07/18(Fri)19:13 >friday night >shower >shave beard >hair product >new jacket >new shoes 59 KB JPG >apply fragrance >say goodnight to parents >hide in the woods until 2am
Anonymous L'OREAL 12/07/18(Fri)19:13 >friday night >shower >shave beard >hair product >new jacket >new shoes 59 KB JPG >apply fragrance >say goodnight to parents >hide in the woods until 2am

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Reverse greentext | /r/Greentext

File: tumblr_f6294e4ecaf8acc01d(...).jpg (351 KB, 1000x1500) Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)21:40:49 No.931053241 [Reply] ► >f-- all my life >want to be straight, literally no attraction to women >try jacking off to straight p---, women >it's f----- up, but find a method that works >keep a faint image of an attractive man in my head during sex (not enough to distract myself from the sex and draw attention) >tell myself "I am banging a man" as a mantra in my head during it >this dumb method has got me laid, dating a girl, and able to be intimate and kiss without much disgust >euphoric that I found a way to be straight Now I just do it for life, right? Homos just do this.
File: tumblr_f6294e4ecaf8acc01d(...).jpg (351 KB, 1000x1500) Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)21:40:49 No.931053241 [Reply] ► >f-- all my life >want to be straight, literally no attraction to women >try jacking off to straight p---, women >it's f----- up, but find a method that works >keep a faint image of an attractive man in my head during sex (not enough to distract myself from the sex and draw attention) >tell myself "I am banging a man" as a mantra in my head during it >this dumb method has got me laid, dating a girl, and able to be intimate and kiss without much disgust >euphoric that I found a way to be straight Now I just do it for life, right? Homos just do this.

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A more civilised age | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)22:12:14 No.208393311 >hey kid! you just blew up like a million people >woooohoo000000! 459 KB PNG Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)22:17:32 No.208393362 1707963364727881.png 1.35 MB PNG >billions of people just died, including her entire family >makes quips about male height >>208393403 # >>208395599 # >>208395971 # >>208395980 # >>208397141 # >>208397297 # Anonymous Anonymo >>2083933 02/05/25(Wed)02:15:59 No.208397297 she was dis dad died >>208394034 # Anonymo >>208393362 # >Isn't your d--- a little too small for a Stromrooper? kinda flew over my head when I first watched this as a kid ngl
Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)22:12:14 No.208393311 >hey kid! you just blew up like a million people >woooohoo000000! 459 KB PNG Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)22:17:32 No.208393362 1707963364727881.png 1.35 MB PNG >billions of people just died, including her entire family >makes quips about male height >>208393403 # >>208395599 # >>208395971 # >>208395980 # >>208397141 # >>208397297 # Anonymous Anonymo >>2083933 02/05/25(Wed)02:15:59 No.208397297 she was dis dad died >>208394034 # Anonymo >>208393362 # >Isn't your d--- a little too small for a Stromrooper? kinda flew over my head when I first watched this as a kid ngl

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Anon Likes Catherine the Great | /r/Greentext

File: 1737195885271.webm (3.88 MB, 636x564)-[Close] ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:12:02 No.702042335 >>702043054 >>702043513 >>702043645 >>702043923 >>702044358 >>702044626 >>702045989 >>702046274 >>702046665 >>702046781 >>702046827 >>702046871 >>702046986 >>702048701 >>702049082 >>702050945 >>702051324 >>702051384 >>702053694 >>702055168 >>702055403 >>702056572 >>702057461 >>702059138 >>702063601 >>702064030 >> Will you aid me in my conquest, anon? ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:32:25 No.702043923 >>702044046 >>702044259 >>702045250 >>702045358 >>702045373 >>702065094 >>702065597 >>702066245 File: 1589472601756.jpg (77 KB, 1280×720) Evil cannot stay hidden for long. God will always bring it to light. (Denounces You). >>702042335 (OP). How are the women uglier than they were in civ 6? Jadwiga mogs her ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:34:01 No.702044046 ► >>702043923 for me it's cleopatra looking down at your c--- during her dialogue ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)12:11:25 No.702046665 ► >>702042335 (OP) >even the journo shill corp s---- on the game >people warned them not to copy the dogshit Humankind formula very early on >they still do it (just so they can sell more DLC) Rip in piss ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)15:53:56 No.702060582 >Looks like a free mobile game >No changes to the gameplay >Brain dead Al >Feminism propaganda >Removed the 4th era (H--------!?) >US leader is literally who >Literally who civs >No Britain even though it makes no f------ sense why the f--- there is US but no Britain Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)16:59:04 No.702063875 ►>>702064127 File: cv.jpg (93 KB, 1280x720) SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VII OFFICIAL TRAILER This game is so freakin epic and diverse, reddit!
File: 1737195885271.webm (3.88 MB, 636x564)-[Close] ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:12:02 No.702042335 >>702043054 >>702043513 >>702043645 >>702043923 >>702044358 >>702044626 >>702045989 >>702046274 >>702046665 >>702046781 >>702046827 >>702046871 >>702046986 >>702048701 >>702049082 >>702050945 >>702051324 >>702051384 >>702053694 >>702055168 >>702055403 >>702056572 >>702057461 >>702059138 >>702063601 >>702064030 >> Will you aid me in my conquest, anon? ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:32:25 No.702043923 >>702044046 >>702044259 >>702045250 >>702045358 >>702045373 >>702065094 >>702065597 >>702066245 File: 1589472601756.jpg (77 KB, 1280×720) Evil cannot stay hidden for long. God will always bring it to light. (Denounces You). >>702042335 (OP). How are the women uglier than they were in civ 6? Jadwiga mogs her ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)11:34:01 No.702044046 ► >>702043923 for me it's cleopatra looking down at your c--- during her dialogue ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)12:11:25 No.702046665 ► >>702042335 (OP) >even the journo shill corp s---- on the game >people warned them not to copy the dogshit Humankind formula very early on >they still do it (just so they can sell more DLC) Rip in piss ☐ Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)15:53:56 No.702060582 >Looks like a free mobile game >No changes to the gameplay >Brain dead Al >Feminism propaganda >Removed the 4th era (H--------!?) >US leader is literally who >Literally who civs >No Britain even though it makes no f------ sense why the f--- there is US but no Britain Anonymous 02/04/25(Tue)16:59:04 No.702063875 ►>>702064127 File: cv.jpg (93 KB, 1280x720) SID MEIER'S CIVILIZATION VII OFFICIAL TRAILER This game is so freakin epic and diverse, reddit!

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Final Fantasy Re-fund | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/08/25(Sat)08:27:07 No.702400092 1738727642318983.png 587 KB PNG >TELL HER TO LIFT HER SHIRT AGAIN, CLOUD >LETS SEE THEM T------
Anonymous 02/08/25(Sat)08:27:07 No.702400092 1738727642318983.png 587 KB PNG >TELL HER TO LIFT HER SHIRT AGAIN, CLOUD >LETS SEE THEM T------

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Road rage classic | /r/Greentext

jeebus.png (88 KB, 233x243) google iqdb Anonymous 11/17/13(Sun)03:54:41 No.516501331 []>>516502180 >>516504309 > Driving 10 over the speed limit on the way home today > Wanted to get home and see roommate's new PS4 > Merge around and pass a car that's going the speed limit > Guy speeds up and then tries to pace me > Spend the next 30 seconds thinking about what I could say to him >We soon hit a stoplight > Guy pulls up next to me and rolls his window down > Asian wannabe gangster, flat brim hat and all > Roll down my window in responsee and lead with "what?" > Get a resounding, extremely aggressive "F--- you" in response > Brain goes numb > "Is that an offer? It's been a while since I had some chink lips on this d---." > I'm not even gay, but it seemed like the right thing to say at the time >He responds with "Hey, F--- YOU You can touch your own tiny ass d---, f-----" > Immediately laugh and respond with "I got a fat eight incher here if you're curious" > Ignore how strange this interaction is getting >"Yeah, b-------, f------ queer." > Brain scans for responses > Only one option found >Take seatbelt off, quickly unzip pants > Rock hard for some reason > Scoot over to the passenger seat > Do a weird stand squat and stick my d--- out the window > Guy starts yelling structureless profanity > Light turns green and he peels out > I'm left in a line of cars with my d--- out the window, in the wrong seat > Why did I just do that >MFW General road rage stories.
jeebus.png (88 KB, 233x243) google iqdb Anonymous 11/17/13(Sun)03:54:41 No.516501331 []>>516502180 >>516504309 > Driving 10 over the speed limit on the way home today > Wanted to get home and see roommate's new PS4 > Merge around and pass a car that's going the speed limit > Guy speeds up and then tries to pace me > Spend the next 30 seconds thinking about what I could say to him >We soon hit a stoplight > Guy pulls up next to me and rolls his window down > Asian wannabe gangster, flat brim hat and all > Roll down my window in responsee and lead with "what?" > Get a resounding, extremely aggressive "F--- you" in response > Brain goes numb > "Is that an offer? It's been a while since I had some chink lips on this d---." > I'm not even gay, but it seemed like the right thing to say at the time >He responds with "Hey, F--- YOU You can touch your own tiny ass d---, f-----" > Immediately laugh and respond with "I got a fat eight incher here if you're curious" > Ignore how strange this interaction is getting >"Yeah, b-------, f------ queer." > Brain scans for responses > Only one option found >Take seatbelt off, quickly unzip pants > Rock hard for some reason > Scoot over to the passenger seat > Do a weird stand squat and stick my d--- out the window > Guy starts yelling structureless profanity > Light turns green and he peels out > I'm left in a line of cars with my d--- out the window, in the wrong seat > Why did I just do that >MFW General road rage stories.

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Autismo raper | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous What's the singular most autis(...) 53 KB JPG >they asked me 02/07/25(Fri)08:18:59 No.80290845 >be me, daydreamer at 9th grade >chilling with my bros at physics class >extremely bored >decided to talk about crushes >everyone takes turns to talk about their crushes and their progression >said it's the plain girl from the other class >buddies are not impressed while I am desperately trying to sound cool >decided to make an edgy comment to shock people and get attention >describe in excrutiate details how I am planning to f------ r--- her in our next school trips (learned the words from berserk) as an edgy joke to show how cool I was >everyone just falls in radio slience and look at me like a piece of f------ s--- >for the next 3 days I was sleepless and scared that they would report me for my attempt to attention grab(may be the last bro code but they didnt) >they've never talked to me and distanced themselves ever since I am 25, have an entire new friend group and a normal, happy life, but I still think about this s--- every night. Should've just p----- my pants.
: Anonymous What's the singular most autis(...) 53 KB JPG >they asked me 02/07/25(Fri)08:18:59 No.80290845 >be me, daydreamer at 9th grade >chilling with my bros at physics class >extremely bored >decided to talk about crushes >everyone takes turns to talk about their crushes and their progression >said it's the plain girl from the other class >buddies are not impressed while I am desperately trying to sound cool >decided to make an edgy comment to shock people and get attention >describe in excrutiate details how I am planning to f------ r--- her in our next school trips (learned the words from berserk) as an edgy joke to show how cool I was >everyone just falls in radio slience and look at me like a piece of f------ s--- >for the next 3 days I was sleepless and scared that they would report me for my attempt to attention grab(may be the last bro code but they didnt) >they've never talked to me and distanced themselves ever since I am 25, have an entire new friend group and a normal, happy life, but I still think about this s--- every night. Should've just p----- my pants.

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Anon watches Babyshows | /r/Greentext

THE Junior HOCKETEER Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:30:31 No.147414447 >>147414562 >>147414988 Never not funny that under modern Disney The Rocketeer just has a literal baby show now. No new sequel or park presence Like a literal show for preschoolers like no let's not shove him into the Mcu let's make a baby show Preschoolers love the rocketeer. Not even a Disney XD show. >>> Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:40:21 No.147414562 >>147414447 (OP) # Disney truly knows its audience, Gen Alpha LOVES the rocketeer. In fact, My little nieces first words were >"D--- Tracy was in development right before Tim Burton's Batman and could've easily rivaled it if not for Disney's unwillingness to secure the rights fully, which is ironically the opposite of the problem nowadays" Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:41:57 No.147414585 >>147414969 It's a comic starring all older white guys and a fetish pinup model, done as an homage to Hollywood from the 20s-50s. It was already sort of niche even in the 80s, it does not fit in with what they want to market now at all. Dis eat making the movie in the early 90s was already kinda weird to people who knew the comic. Literally the most marketable character to modern Disney is the bulldog. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:54:18 No.147414718 >>147414735 >>147414938 This baby show is what they did instead of "Reboot movie with Strong Black Woman taking on the role of the Rocketeer because her dad was a Tuskegee Airman or something" Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:56:13 No.147414735 >>147414718 # This. Disney was trying to do something with the property (probably just to maintain film/tv rights) and after the movie was a non-starter, they s--- this show out. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:16:13 No.147414938 >>147414718 # At least that would make people remember the rocketeer again. This is complete and utter nontent. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:19:04 No.147414969 >>147414585 # D--- Tracy and Batman did extremely well. PreWWII kitsch was at an all time high in the 90s. Disney just f----- up not securing the rights even though Warren Betty would've allowed himself to be sodomized by the rat himself if they made a BMTas for D--- Tracy. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:20:36 No.147414988 >>147414447 (OP) # >like no let's not shove him into the Mcu >>147415077 The team behind "What If...?" wanted him to cameo in the Captain Carter episode in Season One, but one of the higher-ups shut it down because Disney doesn't actually own The Rocketeer. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:21:17 No.147414993 File: CDA534AB-1191-494B-8899-F(...).jpg (9 KB, 320x180) >Lothar is mean because he doesn't have any friends, let's throw him a surprise birthday party with the FBI!
THE Junior HOCKETEER Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:30:31 No.147414447 >>147414562 >>147414988 Never not funny that under modern Disney The Rocketeer just has a literal baby show now. No new sequel or park presence Like a literal show for preschoolers like no let's not shove him into the Mcu let's make a baby show Preschoolers love the rocketeer. Not even a Disney XD show. >>> Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:40:21 No.147414562 >>147414447 (OP) # Disney truly knows its audience, Gen Alpha LOVES the rocketeer. In fact, My little nieces first words were >"D--- Tracy was in development right before Tim Burton's Batman and could've easily rivaled it if not for Disney's unwillingness to secure the rights fully, which is ironically the opposite of the problem nowadays" Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:41:57 No.147414585 >>147414969 It's a comic starring all older white guys and a fetish pinup model, done as an homage to Hollywood from the 20s-50s. It was already sort of niche even in the 80s, it does not fit in with what they want to market now at all. Dis eat making the movie in the early 90s was already kinda weird to people who knew the comic. Literally the most marketable character to modern Disney is the bulldog. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:54:18 No.147414718 >>147414735 >>147414938 This baby show is what they did instead of "Reboot movie with Strong Black Woman taking on the role of the Rocketeer because her dad was a Tuskegee Airman or something" Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:56:13 No.147414735 >>147414718 # This. Disney was trying to do something with the property (probably just to maintain film/tv rights) and after the movie was a non-starter, they s--- this show out. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:16:13 No.147414938 >>147414718 # At least that would make people remember the rocketeer again. This is complete and utter nontent. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:19:04 No.147414969 >>147414585 # D--- Tracy and Batman did extremely well. PreWWII kitsch was at an all time high in the 90s. Disney just f----- up not securing the rights even though Warren Betty would've allowed himself to be sodomized by the rat himself if they made a BMTas for D--- Tracy. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:20:36 No.147414988 >>147414447 (OP) # >like no let's not shove him into the Mcu >>147415077 The team behind "What If...?" wanted him to cameo in the Captain Carter episode in Season One, but one of the higher-ups shut it down because Disney doesn't actually own The Rocketeer. Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:21:17 No.147414993 File: CDA534AB-1191-494B-8899-F(...).jpg (9 KB, 320x180) >Lothar is mean because he doesn't have any friends, let's throw him a surprise birthday party with the FBI!

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Pen Is in the Dark | /r/Greentext

Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous >Be me >Male nurse >Need pen >Check my front pocket >Find a rectal thermometer Some a------ has my pen. Settings Mobile Home 02/07/25(Fri)13:14:36 No.80292626 240 KB PNG Lähi- Apu
Board /r9k/ - ROBOT9001 Anonymous >Be me >Male nurse >Need pen >Check my front pocket >Find a rectal thermometer Some a------ has my pen. Settings Mobile Home 02/07/25(Fri)13:14:36 No.80292626 240 KB PNG Lähi- Apu

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Anon doesn't listen to talk tuah | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:02:11 No.80292540 Screenshot_20250207-134813.png 226 KB PNG >happen to be in some s----- tiktok where you make a joke about sucking c--- >successfully managed to build a media empire out of being a giant w---- >make literally millions off of this s--- >still not enough >use meme coins to pull off ponzi scheme and steal millions >go dark for months and realize no one's paying attention to you anymore >crave validation and miss the attention so much that you make a video crying about how you got tricked into scamming people >still keeping millions she stole Best case, she's a dumb bitch who never bothered doing any research or put any critical thoughts into what she was doing or worst case, she's a lying c--- who has no morals. Why the f--- did normies let her get famous?
: Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)14:02:11 No.80292540 Screenshot_20250207-134813.png 226 KB PNG >happen to be in some s----- tiktok where you make a joke about sucking c--- >successfully managed to build a media empire out of being a giant w---- >make literally millions off of this s--- >still not enough >use meme coins to pull off ponzi scheme and steal millions >go dark for months and realize no one's paying attention to you anymore >crave validation and miss the attention so much that you make a video crying about how you got tricked into scamming people >still keeping millions she stole Best case, she's a dumb bitch who never bothered doing any research or put any critical thoughts into what she was doing or worst case, she's a lying c--- who has no morals. Why the f--- did normies let her get famous?

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Anon owns himself, betrayed by the sun. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 02/01/14(Sat)06:43:48 UTC+1 No.530185563 Replies: >>530185704 >>530186017 >>530186037 >>530186110 >>530186484 >>530187452 >>530187650 >>530192343 >>530212493 >>530212792 File: 1391233428937.jpg-(552 KB, 1200x1600, 2013-04-12-IMG.jpg) What annoys me is I dress way better than most of these f------ running around out there but these douche bags still get the women. Took this awhile back of some goober in lame ass shorts and high school kinda s--- with this qt 3.14. I guess you got to be an a------ to get women these days. BULLS GREEN MEVER
Anonymous 02/01/14(Sat)06:43:48 UTC+1 No.530185563 Replies: >>530185704 >>530186017 >>530186037 >>530186110 >>530186484 >>530187452 >>530187650 >>530192343 >>530212493 >>530212792 File: 1391233428937.jpg-(552 KB, 1200x1600, 2013-04-12-IMG.jpg) What annoys me is I dress way better than most of these f------ running around out there but these douche bags still get the women. Took this awhile back of some goober in lame ass shorts and high school kinda s--- with this qt 3.14. I guess you got to be an a------ to get women these days. BULLS GREEN MEVER

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Anon has intrusive thoughts | /r/Greentext

>see a couple my age out in public >it's this girl who is like 6 inches shorter than her bf >she's staring at him relentlessly and holding onto his arm with a big closed-mouth smile on her face >he feels her staring >looks at her >"...what? what's so funny?" >she shrugs >"I'm just glad I met you" >places her head on his shoulder I have never wanted to kill two people more in my entire life.
>see a couple my age out in public >it's this girl who is like 6 inches shorter than her bf >she's staring at him relentlessly and holding onto his arm with a big closed-mouth smile on her face >he feels her staring >looks at her >"...what? what's so funny?" >she shrugs >"I'm just glad I met you" >places her head on his shoulder I have never wanted to kill two people more in my entire life.

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"They were steel beams, Jerry! Steel beams!" | /r/Greentext

File: vlcsnap-2025-02-07-03h46m(...).png (500 KB, 720x540) ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:52:18 No.208458804 >>208459502 >>208459545 >>208460185 >>208460508 >>208460554 >>208460641 >>208460684 >>208461118 >>208461447 >>208461492 >>208462993 >>208463135 Was a 9/11 special really necessary? ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)16:01:14 No.208461118 >>208461139 >>208461168 >>208465357 >>208458804 (OP). >Kramer gives the hijackers directions to the right gate so they don't miss their flight >George is unaware of the attacks and tries to convince his parents that he got a well-paying job in the WTC >Jerry cancels a gig at the WTC last-minute, leading to accusations that he had foreknowledge of the attacks >Elaine is on vacation with an NYFD firefighter during the attacks, making him miss his chance at glory ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)16:02:44 No.208461139 >>208461118 >Kramer gets hit with a piece of debris at the end.
File: vlcsnap-2025-02-07-03h46m(...).png (500 KB, 720x540) ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)13:52:18 No.208458804 >>208459502 >>208459545 >>208460185 >>208460508 >>208460554 >>208460641 >>208460684 >>208461118 >>208461447 >>208461492 >>208462993 >>208463135 Was a 9/11 special really necessary? ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)16:01:14 No.208461118 >>208461139 >>208461168 >>208465357 >>208458804 (OP). >Kramer gives the hijackers directions to the right gate so they don't miss their flight >George is unaware of the attacks and tries to convince his parents that he got a well-paying job in the WTC >Jerry cancels a gig at the WTC last-minute, leading to accusations that he had foreknowledge of the attacks >Elaine is on vacation with an NYFD firefighter during the attacks, making him miss his chance at glory ☐ Anonymous 02/07/25(Fri)16:02:44 No.208461139 >>208461118 >Kramer gets hit with a piece of debris at the end.

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Old Classic I found from 2013 | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 08/27/13(Tue)15:30 No.22214994 Replies: >>>22215025 >>22215036 >>22215053 >>22215058 >>22215360 >driving with friend >accidentally grab his leg instead of gearstick >we both laugh and I unzip his pants >park the car while fondling his balls >friend is laughing because he knows it's just a joke >start sucking his d--- on this empty parking lot >almost choke on his d--- because i'm laughing so hard >>friend is also laughing his ass off >he starts making train noises while yelling "BROJOB BROJOB! CHOO CHOO" >he c--- and I swallow it all like some stupid f----- >kiss my friend and call him a f----- while laughing Gotta love playing pranks on my friends.
Anonymous 08/27/13(Tue)15:30 No.22214994 Replies: >>>22215025 >>22215036 >>22215053 >>22215058 >>22215360 >driving with friend >accidentally grab his leg instead of gearstick >we both laugh and I unzip his pants >park the car while fondling his balls >friend is laughing because he knows it's just a joke >start sucking his d--- on this empty parking lot >almost choke on his d--- because i'm laughing so hard >>friend is also laughing his ass off >he starts making train noises while yelling "BROJOB BROJOB! CHOO CHOO" >he c--- and I swallow it all like some stupid f----- >kiss my friend and call him a f----- while laughing Gotta love playing pranks on my friends.

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