Greentext Stories - Images

Sorted By:

Errr...Hodor? | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon was a metal vocalist | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 404 KB PNG F---- UP MILWAUKEE" 01/09/24(Tue)07:45:29 No.912109101 >be me >Former metal band vocalist now in my late 30s >Mildly schizo unironically >Living in house with 5 roommates >In the middle of the night I have this half dream where I'm performing a major show and I'm about to scream "WHAT THE >for some reason my half ass brain actually wakes up and I scream this out with a perfect metal scream >F------ everyone ends up in my room and I start bawling telling them it's my f----- up brain >Turns out one of my roommates was twitch streaming and clipped it : Anonymous >Same thing borderline happens again within the same week What do I do about this? 977 KB JPG 01/09/24(Tue)07:46:14 No.912109121 >wakes up >WHAT THE F---- UP MILWAUKEE >goes back to sleep
: Anonymous 404 KB PNG F---- UP MILWAUKEE" 01/09/24(Tue)07:45:29 No.912109101 >be me >Former metal band vocalist now in my late 30s >Mildly schizo unironically >Living in house with 5 roommates >In the middle of the night I have this half dream where I'm performing a major show and I'm about to scream "WHAT THE >for some reason my half ass brain actually wakes up and I scream this out with a perfect metal scream >F------ everyone ends up in my room and I start bawling telling them it's my f----- up brain >Turns out one of my roommates was twitch streaming and clipped it : Anonymous >Same thing borderline happens again within the same week What do I do about this? 977 KB JPG 01/09/24(Tue)07:46:14 No.912109121 >wakes up >WHAT THE F---- UP MILWAUKEE >goes back to sleep

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

anon is stupid | /r/Greentext

:Anonymous 6 KB PNG 01/08/24(Mon) 22:19:28 No.912089080 >be me >have gf >gf turns out to be a liar and manipulator, only wanting money >gf is a jew >average white woman >break up with her >have russian thot roommate >acts like average russian woman, bipolar and lying to get what she wants >average FSB agent >have autist as roommate on second floor >does autist things, tell him.to shut up >he doesn't >ignore him, w/e >have blonde friend >acts like typical blonde, dumb as f--- and mentally incapacitated >no gf material in sight >6'3 so its not a short problem either >generally likeable amongst friends it all went wrong because of the jews
:Anonymous 6 KB PNG 01/08/24(Mon) 22:19:28 No.912089080 >be me >have gf >gf turns out to be a liar and manipulator, only wanting money >gf is a jew >average white woman >break up with her >have russian thot roommate >acts like average russian woman, bipolar and lying to get what she wants >average FSB agent >have autist as roommate on second floor >does autist things, tell him.to shut up >he doesn't >ignore him, w/e >have blonde friend >acts like typical blonde, dumb as f--- and mentally incapacitated >no gf material in sight >6'3 so its not a short problem either >generally likeable amongst friends it all went wrong because of the jews

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is in a sticky situation | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon goes to therapy. | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/17/21(Sat)21:41:13 No.63265334 >Talking to a therapist, she asks me about my sexual history >Tell her I'm a virgin still at 28 WHAH My I did... 55 KB JPG >"Oh, so you're asexual?" >"No, I'm not, I want to have sex I just haven't." >"What do you mean?" >"What do you mean what do I mean?" >"You can't tell me you've honestly been trying this long and are still a virgin?" >mfw I didn't know what to f------ say to that and she changed the subject. Therapy is f------ useless. View Thread
Anonymous 04/17/21(Sat)21:41:13 No.63265334 >Talking to a therapist, she asks me about my sexual history >Tell her I'm a virgin still at 28 WHAH My I did... 55 KB JPG >"Oh, so you're asexual?" >"No, I'm not, I want to have sex I just haven't." >"What do you mean?" >"What do you mean what do I mean?" >"You can't tell me you've honestly been trying this long and are still a virgin?" >mfw I didn't know what to f------ say to that and she changed the subject. Therapy is f------ useless. View Thread

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Dumbledore explains the plothole | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/08/24(Mon)21:23:01 No.194612886 Dumbledore.png 448 KB PNG >Harry, did I ever tell you about Time-Turners? They are magical devices that allow the user to travel backwards in time. This incredible power can even be used to save loved ones from death, as you and your friends discovered with Buckbeak. Despite the fact that the Ministry has an entire closet full of Time-Turners, we never once thought to use one to end Voldemort's reign of terror. It would have been as simple as using one right after he killed one of his victims, say, your parents, and then lying in wait to ambush him before he showed up. Alas, time travel is simply too dangerous to meddle with. It must only be used for the express purpose of allowing a little girl to take extra classes one semester, and only if she is a good friend.
Anonymous 01/08/24(Mon)21:23:01 No.194612886 Dumbledore.png 448 KB PNG >Harry, did I ever tell you about Time-Turners? They are magical devices that allow the user to travel backwards in time. This incredible power can even be used to save loved ones from death, as you and your friends discovered with Buckbeak. Despite the fact that the Ministry has an entire closet full of Time-Turners, we never once thought to use one to end Voldemort's reign of terror. It would have been as simple as using one right after he killed one of his victims, say, your parents, and then lying in wait to ambush him before he showed up. Alas, time travel is simply too dangerous to meddle with. It must only be used for the express purpose of allowing a little girl to take extra classes one semester, and only if she is a good friend.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon activates his tard strength | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 103 KB JPG >ivehadenough.exe >"I'll show them!" >jump out of bed as high as I can and thrust my legs down to increase the impact on the floor 01/09/24(Tue)09:53:49 No.912088002 >hear two massive crashes from downstairs followed by child crying >be me >33 year old alcoholic >downstairs neighbors have 5 y/o little s--- >sounds like they have nightly furniture moving competitions and the screaming never ends >me suffering in bed with a hangover >almost s--- my pj's out of fear >several minutes later ambulance, police, fire truck, and landlord show up >pj's are shat >start throwing back shots of liquid cirrhosis because I have anxiety >knock at the door but pretend I'm not home >phone rings, luckily it's on silent >"anon, are you home?!" I hear through the door >lost in the sauce at this point and don't answer >find out next day a portion of their ceiling collapsed along with their kitchen cabinets : Anonymous >no one knows it was me >downstairs family finds new apartment because they don't feel safe here >peace at last BOOBA 1.06 MB PNG 01/09/24(Tue)09:56:43 No.912088133 >>912088002 (OP) # Put me in the screenshot, redditors
: Anonymous 103 KB JPG >ivehadenough.exe >"I'll show them!" >jump out of bed as high as I can and thrust my legs down to increase the impact on the floor 01/09/24(Tue)09:53:49 No.912088002 >hear two massive crashes from downstairs followed by child crying >be me >33 year old alcoholic >downstairs neighbors have 5 y/o little s--- >sounds like they have nightly furniture moving competitions and the screaming never ends >me suffering in bed with a hangover >almost s--- my pj's out of fear >several minutes later ambulance, police, fire truck, and landlord show up >pj's are shat >start throwing back shots of liquid cirrhosis because I have anxiety >knock at the door but pretend I'm not home >phone rings, luckily it's on silent >"anon, are you home?!" I hear through the door >lost in the sauce at this point and don't answer >find out next day a portion of their ceiling collapsed along with their kitchen cabinets : Anonymous >no one knows it was me >downstairs family finds new apartment because they don't feel safe here >peace at last BOOBA 1.06 MB PNG 01/09/24(Tue)09:56:43 No.912088133 >>912088002 (OP) # Put me in the screenshot, redditors

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon wears pants | /r/Greentext


Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon has shower sex | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 38 KB JPG 08/17/18(Fri)02:45:42 No.47557562 2 Replies >Be me >Take shower >Water touches my whole body including c--- >Watercycle.jpg >Girl takes shower >Water touches vagina >Mfw I basically had shower sex Later virgins View Thread 08/17/18(Fri)03:07:53 No.47557792 : Anonymous >>47557562 (OP) # F--- OFF NORMIE GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT
: Anonymous 38 KB JPG 08/17/18(Fri)02:45:42 No.47557562 2 Replies >Be me >Take shower >Water touches my whole body including c--- >Watercycle.jpg >Girl takes shower >Water touches vagina >Mfw I basically had shower sex Later virgins View Thread 08/17/18(Fri)03:07:53 No.47557792 : Anonymous >>47557562 (OP) # F--- OFF NORMIE GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon goes to Japan | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 141 KB PNG >go to japan >girl at a bar bought me a(n expensive) drink >asked to see my passport >took a pic of it >said she was going to the bathroom and never came back >see same girl at another bar >she pretended not to know me >tell her i recognize her tattoo >she suddenly doesn't speak english anymore >bartender tells me to leave
: Anonymous 141 KB PNG >go to japan >girl at a bar bought me a(n expensive) drink >asked to see my passport >took a pic of it >said she was going to the bathroom and never came back >see same girl at another bar >she pretended not to know me >tell her i recognize her tattoo >she suddenly doesn't speak english anymore >bartender tells me to leave

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Just incel things | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 05/17/22(Tue)13:14:03 >random girl is nice to you for 5 seconds No.168138175 >daydream a whole relationship with her for weeks What a loser r-right bros? N-never happened to me.
: Anonymous 45 KB JPG 05/17/22(Tue)13:14:03 >random girl is nice to you for 5 seconds No.168138175 >daydream a whole relationship with her for weeks What a loser r-right bros? N-never happened to me.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

On and on you are just like my favorite song | /r/Greentext

1h (1/9 1:10) 76047520 · 11 Re - 0 Img PNG 25KB (370x320) 1694007935846400.png 8 Replies >get gf >things going OK for some time >expenses creeping up because she needs to eat out every other day and buy new clothes every weekend, but apart from that, its fine >September 2023 >she NEEDS to see this band in another city >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation, hotel, she even demanded to buy a expensive costume to attend the concert etc >fortunately arranged to pay the whole thing in 2 installments which made it more accessible >about to pay off the 2nd installment, feel relief >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation (plane tickets) hotel >again manage to arrange to pay in a few installments to make it more affordable >yesterday >about to pay off the last installment, happy its over, can finally save some money >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it holy F--- i thought women not knowing how to save money and being responsible for 90% of all spending was just a meme, but no, its real.
1h (1/9 1:10) 76047520 · 11 Re - 0 Img PNG 25KB (370x320) 1694007935846400.png 8 Replies >get gf >things going OK for some time >expenses creeping up because she needs to eat out every other day and buy new clothes every weekend, but apart from that, its fine >September 2023 >she NEEDS to see this band in another city >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation, hotel, she even demanded to buy a expensive costume to attend the concert etc >fortunately arranged to pay the whole thing in 2 installments which made it more accessible >about to pay off the 2nd installment, feel relief >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it >buy VERY expensive tickets + transportation (plane tickets) hotel >again manage to arrange to pay in a few installments to make it more affordable >yesterday >about to pay off the last installment, happy its over, can finally save some money >says another band is coming in a few months and NEEDS to see it holy F--- i thought women not knowing how to save money and being responsible for 90% of all spending was just a meme, but no, its real.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon is depressed | /r/Greentext

122 KB JPG 03/26/22(Sat) 19:16:05 No.67947955 >Be extremely depressed >Make up delusions of grandeur and superiority >Start unironically believing said delusions >Stop being depressed and feel like a literal god for no reason at all It's this easy, you can change so much in a moment, reality is merely an illusion you can bend to your will and so is your personality. 8 Replies / 1 Image : Anonymous View Thread 03/26/22(Sat) 19:24:26 No.67 >>67947955 (OP) # you're legitimately describing manic depression
122 KB JPG 03/26/22(Sat) 19:16:05 No.67947955 >Be extremely depressed >Make up delusions of grandeur and superiority >Start unironically believing said delusions >Stop being depressed and feel like a literal god for no reason at all It's this easy, you can change so much in a moment, reality is merely an illusion you can bend to your will and so is your personality. 8 Replies / 1 Image : Anonymous View Thread 03/26/22(Sat) 19:24:26 No.67 >>67947955 (OP) # you're legitimately describing manic depression

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon's foolproof retirement plans | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous (ID: HgMqmU2Q 218 KB JPG 01/08/24(Mon)16:52:52 No.19354674 "Where do you see yourself in 5 years." Plan A: >wageslave until 65 Plan B: >move to norway/sweden >catfish p--- into meeting up with me >kill them brutally >do this as many times as i can >eventually get cought >live comfortably in prison for the next 20 years >ill see from there
: Anonymous (ID: HgMqmU2Q 218 KB JPG 01/08/24(Mon)16:52:52 No.19354674 "Where do you see yourself in 5 years." Plan A: >wageslave until 65 Plan B: >move to norway/sweden >catfish p--- into meeting up with me >kill them brutally >do this as many times as i can >eventually get cought >live comfortably in prison for the next 20 years >ill see from there

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

A glitch in the matrix | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 01/09/24(Tue)01:33:41 No.76045997 >become homeless >no longer care about materialism >don't need a phone >don't need money >just get fed by charities and be free >no rent, no bills, free healthcare some days i think about packing it all in
Anonymous 01/09/24(Tue)01:33:41 No.76045997 >become homeless >no longer care about materialism >don't need a phone >don't need money >just get fed by charities and be free >no rent, no bills, free healthcare some days i think about packing it all in

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Santa has an opinion on infantry troops | /r/Greentext

Santa Claus Infantrymen be like 01/08/24(Mon)12:55:32 No.663136876 F--- Horses Horses Stink d.o. infantry 4 Lyfe X Unbenannt.png 39 KB PNG >Oooh yeah, I am Infantroooning >Cavalery? Horsefucker! HORSEFUCKER!!! >No, I don't have a foot fetish. >Yeah, fighting on foot makes me so hard. >Horses are only good for eating. >Why would you ride a retarded horse if you can just fight on foot? >Infantry for da epic win!!! >I am Infantroooooo0000000000000000000000 00000000000oooning!!! 00000000000000000000000000000000000
Santa Claus Infantrymen be like 01/08/24(Mon)12:55:32 No.663136876 F--- Horses Horses Stink d.o. infantry 4 Lyfe X Unbenannt.png 39 KB PNG >Oooh yeah, I am Infantroooning >Cavalery? Horsefucker! HORSEFUCKER!!! >No, I don't have a foot fetish. >Yeah, fighting on foot makes me so hard. >Horses are only good for eating. >Why would you ride a retarded horse if you can just fight on foot? >Infantry for da epic win!!! >I am Infantroooooo0000000000000000000000 00000000000oooning!!! 00000000000000000000000000000000000

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon gets an interesting hookup | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 211 KB JPG 04/07/21 (Wed)01:43:13 No.851492990 > be me > going to bang chick i met on tinder > arrive at her house > she immediately leads me in to the bedroom > she pulls her pants down enough so that only her ass is visible > meh, a---'s fine too i guess > dont think any more about it, just bust into her ass > she suddenly tells me she has a surprise for me > she pulls at her head, taking off a mask > it's f------ joe rogan > he laughs and calls me a f----- before body slamming me to the ground, breaking my neck and instantly paralyzing me
Anonymous 211 KB JPG 04/07/21 (Wed)01:43:13 No.851492990 > be me > going to bang chick i met on tinder > arrive at her house > she immediately leads me in to the bedroom > she pulls her pants down enough so that only her ass is visible > meh, a---'s fine too i guess > dont think any more about it, just bust into her ass > she suddenly tells me she has a surprise for me > she pulls at her head, taking off a mask > it's f------ joe rogan > he laughs and calls me a f----- before body slamming me to the ground, breaking my neck and instantly paralyzing me

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon wishes he was a landlord because of trans housemates | /r/Greentext

01/07/24(Sun)07:22:53 No.30517871 >trans housemates bedroom is really starting to reek >when the door is open I can see trash is piling up all over the floor >mold is growing on their windows, I have offered multiple times to show them how to clean it but they just keep saying they'll do it themselves >random items go missing: plates, measuring jugs, cook pots, extension cables, knives >the slightest setback results in them performing highly melodramatic full bodied racking sobs to be heard by the whole house >they tried to kill themselves late last year so what do I do without setting off this minefield Anonymous 85 KB JPG Anonymous >>30517871 (OP) # Threaten to evict, or move out yourself. If neither of these are doable, please explain why. >>30517886 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:23:38 No.30517875 Anonymous >>30517875 # I'm not the landlord I cant evict them >>30517895 # >>30518034 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:25:33 No.30517886
01/07/24(Sun)07:22:53 No.30517871 >trans housemates bedroom is really starting to reek >when the door is open I can see trash is piling up all over the floor >mold is growing on their windows, I have offered multiple times to show them how to clean it but they just keep saying they'll do it themselves >random items go missing: plates, measuring jugs, cook pots, extension cables, knives >the slightest setback results in them performing highly melodramatic full bodied racking sobs to be heard by the whole house >they tried to kill themselves late last year so what do I do without setting off this minefield Anonymous 85 KB JPG Anonymous >>30517871 (OP) # Threaten to evict, or move out yourself. If neither of these are doable, please explain why. >>30517886 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:23:38 No.30517875 Anonymous >>30517875 # I'm not the landlord I cant evict them >>30517895 # >>30518034 # 01/07/24(Sun)07:25:33 No.30517886

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext

Anon tries repressing and gets gayer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.86 MB PNG Anonymous 01/08/24(Mon)10:49:53 No.76044283 I will be alone forever. >try to repress my homosexuality by jerking off to big booba women 01/08/24(Mon)10:55:17 No.76044324 >going great >go to bed >dream I am having sex >huge fat guy >im topping >we both c-- at the same time like in my animes >covers my face and pillow in ungodly amount of >>76044392 # >>76044422 # coom >wake up checking pillow for coom >thankfully didn't c-- in my pants What does it all mean? : Anonymous Anonymous >>76044324 # i wish i were having your dreams, i am not sure dude maybe you are ironically a repressed heterosexual, think about it, have a big think 01/08/24 (Mon)11:03:39 No.76044392 01/08/24 (Mon)11:07:17 No.76044422 >>76044324 # The more you try to repress it the worse it gets anon.
: Anonymous 1.86 MB PNG Anonymous 01/08/24(Mon)10:49:53 No.76044283 I will be alone forever. >try to repress my homosexuality by jerking off to big booba women 01/08/24(Mon)10:55:17 No.76044324 >going great >go to bed >dream I am having sex >huge fat guy >im topping >we both c-- at the same time like in my animes >covers my face and pillow in ungodly amount of >>76044392 # >>76044422 # coom >wake up checking pillow for coom >thankfully didn't c-- in my pants What does it all mean? : Anonymous Anonymous >>76044324 # i wish i were having your dreams, i am not sure dude maybe you are ironically a repressed heterosexual, think about it, have a big think 01/08/24 (Mon)11:03:39 No.76044392 01/08/24 (Mon)11:07:17 No.76044422 >>76044324 # The more you try to repress it the worse it gets anon.

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext gay repression

I remember | /r/Greentext

3h (1/8 15:16) 76043048 8 Re - 1 Img PNG 145KB (640 × 513) · B4B26240-9A11-45F4-B56F-2D3FB445EBCA.png 3 Replies >swap shifts with a coworker >qt coworker sees me and is surprised >in the past i told her i like curly hair >if i knew you were coming i would not have straightened my hair anon! >mfw she has a boyfriend and way out of my league what did she mean by this?
3h (1/8 15:16) 76043048 8 Re - 1 Img PNG 145KB (640 × 513) · B4B26240-9A11-45F4-B56F-2D3FB445EBCA.png 3 Replies >swap shifts with a coworker >qt coworker sees me and is surprised >in the past i told her i like curly hair >if i knew you were coming i would not have straightened my hair anon! >mfw she has a boyfriend and way out of my league what did she mean by this?

Greentext Stories
reddit greentext greentext memes 4chan 4chan memes /r/greentext