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Anon locks his ass | /r/Greentext

Asslock Thread No.896422739 3 hours ago 714TTmmNbcL._AC_SL1500_.jpg JPG 103.3 KiB 1500x1204 >Be me >see this asslock on Amazon >claims to be 100% r--- proof >buy asslock >start wearing it whenever I leave the house >go to late night gym because no ones there >go showering afterwards >suddenly a black guy appears c--- in hand >ohfuck.jpg >"Bend over Whiteboi" >He sees my asslock >"Oh f--- an asslock" and leaves >mfw I just got saved by my asslock >mfw it's really 100% r--- proof Why don't you own an asslock anon? 4 replies No.896423265 3 hours ago controlling-laugh-laughing.gif GIF 555.5 KiB 220x293 No.896423445 3 hours ago >2023 >"ass lock" joke is born >eventually some zoomer takes it seriously >we begin the transition from "pear of anguish" to recreational ass locking i hope you're happy 1 reply . I
Asslock Thread No.896422739 3 hours ago 714TTmmNbcL._AC_SL1500_.jpg JPG 103.3 KiB 1500x1204 >Be me >see this asslock on Amazon >claims to be 100% r--- proof >buy asslock >start wearing it whenever I leave the house >go to late night gym because no ones there >go showering afterwards >suddenly a black guy appears c--- in hand >ohfuck.jpg >"Bend over Whiteboi" >He sees my asslock >"Oh f--- an asslock" and leaves >mfw I just got saved by my asslock >mfw it's really 100% r--- proof Why don't you own an asslock anon? 4 replies No.896423265 3 hours ago controlling-laugh-laughing.gif GIF 555.5 KiB 220x293 No.896423445 3 hours ago >2023 >"ass lock" joke is born >eventually some zoomer takes it seriously >we begin the transition from "pear of anguish" to recreational ass locking i hope you're happy 1 reply . I

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Anon forgot to bring a towel. | /r/Greentext

File: me.png (33 KB, 213x195) 18333 Terraria gaming Anonymous 03/24/23(Fri) 10:42:33 No.72689973 > be me > my buddies have been playing Terraria for a while > Decide to join em > I've had Terraria on steam for a long time but never played before > Create a character > Make him black for s---- and giggles, pic related > Join the game > 10 seconds in I fall into a deep puddle > Guys how do I swim? > "You can't."
File: me.png (33 KB, 213x195) 18333 Terraria gaming Anonymous 03/24/23(Fri) 10:42:33 No.72689973 > be me > my buddies have been playing Terraria for a while > Decide to join em > I've had Terraria on steam for a long time but never played before > Create a character > Make him black for s---- and giggles, pic related > Join the game > 10 seconds in I fall into a deep puddle > Guys how do I swim? > "You can't."

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Average cock enjoyer | /r/Greentext

03/22/23 (Wed)23:13:36 No.19081011 Broiler1-500x350.jpg 62 KB JPG >incredibly cheap to produce >converts inedible slop into highly digestible protein and fat >take only 6 weeks to raise >completely retarded so the ethics don't matter much >feeds billions of people keeping them strong and healthy ;) Is there anything she can't do? We should build shrines to these animals they are based. 03/23/23(Thu)05:40:32 No.19081672 03/23/23(Thu)05:47:03 No.19081681 : Anonymous : Anonymous >>19081011 (OP) # >We should build shrines to these animals Why am I not surprised that OP worships cocks?
03/22/23 (Wed)23:13:36 No.19081011 Broiler1-500x350.jpg 62 KB JPG >incredibly cheap to produce >converts inedible slop into highly digestible protein and fat >take only 6 weeks to raise >completely retarded so the ethics don't matter much >feeds billions of people keeping them strong and healthy ;) Is there anything she can't do? We should build shrines to these animals they are based. 03/23/23(Thu)05:40:32 No.19081672 03/23/23(Thu)05:47:03 No.19081681 : Anonymous : Anonymous >>19081011 (OP) # >We should build shrines to these animals Why am I not surprised that OP worships cocks?

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Anon has an unexpected visitor | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous home alone 56 KB JPG 03/23/23(Thu)22:11:24 No.34381129 >home alone >sneeze >hear "bless you" im gonna cry im gonna cry im gonna cry im so f------ scared
: Anonymous home alone 56 KB JPG 03/23/23(Thu)22:11:24 No.34381129 >home alone >sneeze >hear "bless you" im gonna cry im gonna cry im gonna cry im so f------ scared

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Anons friend | /r/Greentext

366 KB PNG >eating popsicle with my friend >it looks phallic >we lol a bit >lick it seductively while looking at him >he is laughing his ass off >put it in my mouth and push it as deep as i can >gag and then pull it out >i look like one of those hentai girls, spit trailing and everything >he stops laughing and then looks shocked >look down >rock hard
366 KB PNG >eating popsicle with my friend >it looks phallic >we lol a bit >lick it seductively while looking at him >he is laughing his ass off >put it in my mouth and push it as deep as i can >gag and then pull it out >i look like one of those hentai girls, spit trailing and everything >he stops laughing and then looks shocked >look down >rock hard

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Anon celebrates the loss of his bully's legs | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 03/20/23(Mon)22:21:14 No.179404075 360_F_128037594_jfoJkaFUSILVW55FxQzCFGmNrqrdAsNj.jpg 43 KB JPG Tonight, the Chad who bullied me at school came back from Ukraine without legs.
: Anonymous 03/20/23(Mon)22:21:14 No.179404075 360_F_128037594_jfoJkaFUSILVW55FxQzCFGmNrqrdAsNj.jpg 43 KB JPG Tonight, the Chad who bullied me at school came back from Ukraine without legs.

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Anon gets an offer | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 491 KB PNG 03/24/23(Fri)08:39:23 No.896419351 >go see asian prostitute >do 69 and stuff >she tells me how good I am at licking p---- >at the end gives me her private number even though she's not supposed to >asks me not to tell her boss and to come back for free just to lick her p---- Should I do it? : Anonymous >>896419351 (OP) # I'll do it for you 03/24/23(Fri)08:40:14 No.896419381
: Anonymous 491 KB PNG 03/24/23(Fri)08:39:23 No.896419351 >go see asian prostitute >do 69 and stuff >she tells me how good I am at licking p---- >at the end gives me her private number even though she's not supposed to >asks me not to tell her boss and to come back for free just to lick her p---- Should I do it? : Anonymous >>896419351 (OP) # I'll do it for you 03/24/23(Fri)08:40:14 No.896419381

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Anon is not very fond of the antichrist | /r/Greentext

UkrSiberian Femboymoder (ID: 122Fq2j1) = 03/24/23(Fri)12:45:06 No.420839638 BURGER Burger King → KING @BurgerKingUK give me anime suggestions Перевести твит 02:33 · 23 мар. 23 . 88,3К Просмотры 22 Ретвита(-ов) 5 Цитаты 543 Отметки(-ок) «Нравится» ac Tonight Breakfo Tomohon Sir Baudelaire @abelac...20 4. В ответ @BurgerKingUK Got your back 22 DISNEY CHANNEL original 1 BURGER KING W CORK HOUSE IN THE SUNG WATCH CORY IN THE HOUSE on Disney Channel! 12 58 il 2105 Burger King @BurgerKi... 74. ⠀ IMG_20230323_231958.jpg 521 KB JPG ⠀ ● I HATE BRANDS I HATE CORPORATIONS I HATE THE ANTICHRIST
UkrSiberian Femboymoder (ID: 122Fq2j1) = 03/24/23(Fri)12:45:06 No.420839638 BURGER Burger King → KING @BurgerKingUK give me anime suggestions Перевести твит 02:33 · 23 мар. 23 . 88,3К Просмотры 22 Ретвита(-ов) 5 Цитаты 543 Отметки(-ок) «Нравится» ac Tonight Breakfo Tomohon Sir Baudelaire @abelac...20 4. В ответ @BurgerKingUK Got your back 22 DISNEY CHANNEL original 1 BURGER KING W CORK HOUSE IN THE SUNG WATCH CORY IN THE HOUSE on Disney Channel! 12 58 il 2105 Burger King @BurgerKi... 74. ⠀ IMG_20230323_231958.jpg 521 KB JPG ⠀ ● I HATE BRANDS I HATE CORPORATIONS I HATE THE ANTICHRIST

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Anon remembers 9th grade | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous NINTINA 62 KB JPG 03/22/23 (Wed) 20:43:24 No.72670067 >Be me about to sleep >Remember my 9th grade satanist fase and wake up from the cringe >Remember my awful goth gf >That bitch blew me in a public bathroom and accidentaly bit my balls never get a goth gf guys
: Anonymous NINTINA 62 KB JPG 03/22/23 (Wed) 20:43:24 No.72670067 >Be me about to sleep >Remember my 9th grade satanist fase and wake up from the cringe >Remember my awful goth gf >That bitch blew me in a public bathroom and accidentaly bit my balls never get a goth gf guys

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Anon lookmaxxed | /r/Greentext

File: FnC7FVwXwAM8WGq.jpg (58 KB, 944x1004) IT'S JOEVER Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:02:10 No.72679102 [Reply] >>72679108 >fashionmaxxed >skinmaxxed >fitmaxxed >skinmaxxed >hairlinemaxxed >posturemaxxed >teethmaxxed >peaked at 6/10 Is it over when it never begun? >> Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:02:58 No.72679108 ► >>72679181 >>72679102 (OP) Well you can still get 5/10 or less women Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:10:48 No.72679181 >>72679108 But im better than that...
File: FnC7FVwXwAM8WGq.jpg (58 KB, 944x1004) IT'S JOEVER Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:02:10 No.72679102 [Reply] >>72679108 >fashionmaxxed >skinmaxxed >fitmaxxed >skinmaxxed >hairlinemaxxed >posturemaxxed >teethmaxxed >peaked at 6/10 Is it over when it never begun? >> Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:02:58 No.72679108 ► >>72679181 >>72679102 (OP) Well you can still get 5/10 or less women Anonymous 03/23/23(Thu)10:10:48 No.72679181 >>72679108 But im better than that...

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It's over... | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 27 KB JPG 03/23/23(Thu)18:29:47 No.28609564 >relaxing in my neighbor backyard drinking some beers after work >Open WhatsApp and start chatting with my best friend >complaining because some of the behaviors of my girlfriend >send an audio >"yes bruh, i feel like for her i'm not THE one, just ANOTHER one, i feel like I'm not special to her at this point" >he send me an audio back >can't hear anything >"I feel like im just getting the leftovers of other men, in all truth something holds me back from fully loving her, like if she wasn't mine, it's only my turn to f--- her" >he send me an audio back, and again can't hear anything >increase the volume and reproduce his own and my own audios all over again >open YouTube and play a song >MFW I notice THE F------ BLUETOOTH ICON My girlfriend often use my phone to listen to music with in Bluetooth speakers, i totally forgot about it. She was inside the house. So probably she heard the audios and what i said. I don't want to go back home. I know she is in the house. She probably heard everything...
: Anonymous 27 KB JPG 03/23/23(Thu)18:29:47 No.28609564 >relaxing in my neighbor backyard drinking some beers after work >Open WhatsApp and start chatting with my best friend >complaining because some of the behaviors of my girlfriend >send an audio >"yes bruh, i feel like for her i'm not THE one, just ANOTHER one, i feel like I'm not special to her at this point" >he send me an audio back >can't hear anything >"I feel like im just getting the leftovers of other men, in all truth something holds me back from fully loving her, like if she wasn't mine, it's only my turn to f--- her" >he send me an audio back, and again can't hear anything >increase the volume and reproduce his own and my own audios all over again >open YouTube and play a song >MFW I notice THE F------ BLUETOOTH ICON My girlfriend often use my phone to listen to music with in Bluetooth speakers, i totally forgot about it. She was inside the house. So probably she heard the audios and what i said. I don't want to go back home. I know she is in the house. She probably heard everything...

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I love /k/omrade | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous >>57579908 (OP) # So the US can have an excuse to send more money to Biden's buddies in Jewkraine, and the MIC can have their new Afghanistan. Don't have the clip, but the WEF literally admitted that Putin was one of their "young global leaders" a while back. It's all part of the plan. >>57580160 # 03/22/23(Wed)13:54:18 No.57580103 >>57580184 # >>57586006 # Anonymous >>57580103 # so you're suggesting that the CIA has infiltrated the russian government and convinced putin to start the war? god bless america 03/22/23(Wed)13:59:30 No.57580160
: Anonymous >>57579908 (OP) # So the US can have an excuse to send more money to Biden's buddies in Jewkraine, and the MIC can have their new Afghanistan. Don't have the clip, but the WEF literally admitted that Putin was one of their "young global leaders" a while back. It's all part of the plan. >>57580160 # 03/22/23(Wed)13:54:18 No.57580103 >>57580184 # >>57586006 # Anonymous >>57580103 # so you're suggesting that the CIA has infiltrated the russian government and convinced putin to start the war? god bless america 03/22/23(Wed)13:59:30 No.57580160

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Anon Becomes A Neet and Idk how people neet for that long I get bored | /r/Greentext

: Anonymous 1.85 MB GIF 02/23/18 (Fri) 10:10:38 No.43412282 >30+ >no education of worth >never had a job >no friends >never been on a date / no gf >physically and mentally ill >poor >below average looks >live in remote area, opportunities limited >no car license >spent every day for past 10+ years NEET in my room all day on my computer or just in my room doing nothing because there's nothing else How does one even begin to escape such a hopeless situation?
: Anonymous 1.85 MB GIF 02/23/18 (Fri) 10:10:38 No.43412282 >30+ >no education of worth >never had a job >no friends >never been on a date / no gf >physically and mentally ill >poor >below average looks >live in remote area, opportunities limited >no car license >spent every day for past 10+ years NEET in my room all day on my computer or just in my room doing nothing because there's nothing else How does one even begin to escape such a hopeless situation?

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Anon is trying hard :D | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 27 KB JPG 04/04/21(Sun)21:19:57 No.851308366 >Started to shower regularly >Brushing teeth more often >Cleaning my clothes and room >Going out for walks in the after noon >Got a nice haircut >Drinking more water >No more hamburgers and nuggies I'm gonna make it, bros.
Anonymous 27 KB JPG 04/04/21(Sun)21:19:57 No.851308366 >Started to shower regularly >Brushing teeth more often >Cleaning my clothes and room >Going out for walks in the after noon >Got a nice haircut >Drinking more water >No more hamburgers and nuggies I'm gonna make it, bros.

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Anon goes to the gun store | /r/Greentext

Anonymous 04/30/21(Fri)03:16:59 No.63446820 >turn 18 >decide it is time for me to buy weapons >read gun laws and look what I can buy >go to gun shop and buy a bolt action rifle and some ammo, ill shoot at cans in the garden >cute shop assistants asks me to prove im 18 >i show her my driving license that has an old pic >"wow, you lost a lot of weight anon, you look much better now, great job." >go bonkers and shoot her because its the nicest thing a person has ever said to me 6 KB PNG
Anonymous 04/30/21(Fri)03:16:59 No.63446820 >turn 18 >decide it is time for me to buy weapons >read gun laws and look what I can buy >go to gun shop and buy a bolt action rifle and some ammo, ill shoot at cans in the garden >cute shop assistants asks me to prove im 18 >i show her my driving license that has an old pic >"wow, you lost a lot of weight anon, you look much better now, great job." >go bonkers and shoot her because its the nicest thing a person has ever said to me 6 KB PNG

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Anon just wants to play basketball | /r/Greentext

TO 10. CAST BILT MAT EINE 58C8D2B4-F789-4DD6-B076-D1AF744C55A3.jpg 125 KB JPG FOUNDE Overheard a girl in my media class call me gay to her friends cause she sat by me for a week and apparently I didnt talk to her once and when we had the option to work with someone I always worked alone. All I do in that class is watch a random 90s basketball game or play Pokemon showdown. Didnt even notice the she sat next to me. Now everyone on her sorority thinks Im gay. Im literally only at that school to play basketball on scholarship and thats it. I hate it at the place and I cant wait till I can go home during the off-season. : Anonymous 03/24/23(Fri)09:56:45 No.72687183 >>72687167 (OP) # >If he doesn't immediately worship me he must be gay Why the F--- are c---- like this? >>72687228 # >>72687303 #
TO 10. CAST BILT MAT EINE 58C8D2B4-F789-4DD6-B076-D1AF744C55A3.jpg 125 KB JPG FOUNDE Overheard a girl in my media class call me gay to her friends cause she sat by me for a week and apparently I didnt talk to her once and when we had the option to work with someone I always worked alone. All I do in that class is watch a random 90s basketball game or play Pokemon showdown. Didnt even notice the she sat next to me. Now everyone on her sorority thinks Im gay. Im literally only at that school to play basketball on scholarship and thats it. I hate it at the place and I cant wait till I can go home during the off-season. : Anonymous 03/24/23(Fri)09:56:45 No.72687183 >>72687167 (OP) # >If he doesn't immediately worship me he must be gay Why the F--- are c---- like this? >>72687228 # >>72687303 #

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